New Jersey Jewish Standard, Jan. 4, 2013

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January 4, 2013 · Vol. LXXXII · No. 15 · $1.00 JSTANDARD.COM

201180N E W J E R S E Y

JewishStandard

Booze-free BirthrightJACS Israel trips offer the newly sober a road to recovery

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PUBLISHER’S STATEMENTJewish Standard (USPS 275-700 ISN 0021-6747) is published weekly on Fridays with an additional edition every October, by the New Jersey Jewish Media Group, 1086 Teaneck Road, Teaneck, NJ 07666. Periodicals postage paid at Hackensack, NJ and additional offices. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to New Jersey Jewish Media Group, 1086 Teaneck Road, Teaneck, NJ 07666. Subscription price is $30.00 per year. Out-of-state subscriptions are $45.00, Foreign countries subscriptions are $75.00.The appearance of an advertisement in The Jewish Standard does not constitute a kashrut endorsement. The publishing of a paid political advertisement does not constitute an endorsement of any candidate political party or political position by the newspaper, the Federation or any employees.The Jewish Standard assumes no responsibility to return unsolicited editorial or graphic materials. All rights in letters and unso-licited editorial, and graphic material will be treated as unconditionally assigned for publication and copyright purposes and subject to JEWISH STANDARD’s unrestricted right to edit and to comment editorially. Nothing may be reprinted in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher. © 2013

FYI

It could be verseRoses are red.Beaches are sand.A poem on the American dreamcan win you a grand.

That’s the bottom line of a poetry contest being sponsored by Jewish Currents magazine. Poems will be judged by former New Jersey poet laureate — and Jewish Currents reader — Gerald Stern.

Despite the title of the magazine, neither the poem nor the poets must be Jewish.

“I intended it to be a broad subject,” said the magazine’s editor, Lawrence Bush. “The American dream has psychedelic qualities, nightmarish qualities, dreamy and fulfilled and magnificent qualities.

“I’m sure many writers would look to their stash of poems and would find poems that would fit under that rubric.”

At the same time, he’s well aware of the significance that the American dream — which is represented by the Statue of Liberty on the contest’s promotional materials — holds for American Jews.

“The American Jewish experience is a glorious experience,” Bush said. “It unleashed Jews as political innovators, cultural creators, and world changers in a marvelous way. There’s a lot to talk about in the interaction of Jewish particularism and Jewish identity that exploded in America.”

Bush has been editing the 67-year-old quarterly publication for just over a decade. He is particularly proud of the arts section, “six-teen pages in color which presents visual artists and poets.”

With its roots in old-time Jewish leftism, the magazine now “culti-vates Jewish identity as countercultural, or anti-establishment, or as a the-world-is-not-perfected-and-we-can-help-perfect-it identity,” he said. “We are the embodiment of what’s left of that kind of pro-gressive Jewish spirit, and are trying to reinvent it all the time.”

Bush hopes the poetry contest will become an annual occurrence.

There is a $18 entry fee (for the submission of up to three po-ems), which includes a one-year subscription to the magazine. Poems must be previously unpublished, and the deadline to enter is January 15. The top 36 poems will be published as a chapbook. Full details are at http://jewishcurrents.org/poetry-prize

–Larry Yudelson

letters to the edItor PAGe 16

Iran’s nuclear threat, the peace process, Hezbollah and Hamas should always be secondary, with Mr. Pollard’s plight being number 1. David Subin, Englewood

CANdlelIGhtING tIMe: FrIdAY, jAN. 4, 4:23 P.M.shABBAt eNds: sAtUrdAY, jAN. 5, 5:27 P.M.

Noshes .................................................................................................. 4oPINIoN ..............................................................................................14Cover storY...................................................................... 18keePING kosher .....................................................30 torAh CoMMeNtArY ..................................32

Arts & CUltUre ........................................................33lIFeCYCle ....................................................................................37ClAssIFIed ...............................................................................38GAllerY ........................................................................................40reAl estAte ........................................................................ 41

Contents I could take them or leave them 0%

I loathe them 6%

I love them 94%

What do you feel about Women of the Wall?

Did you go out for New Year’s Eve?

To vote, log onto jstandard.com

loCAl

Calling on the world to solve Israel’s refugee crisis 8

loCAl

Hebrew schools come together 6

loCAl

Alex Witchel’s memoir of memory loss 11

jewIsh world

Reform, AIPAC disagree on Palestinians 24

Arts & CUltUre

The Sound of Music’s Jewish soul 33

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Jewish standard JanUarY 4, 2013 3

Gerald Stern

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‑California‑based Nate Bloom can be reached at [email protected]


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All together nowJoint hebrew school offers students the opportunity to meet and share

Lois GoLdrich

Some ideas simply make good sense.According to Lisa Swill, education vice

president at Fair Lawn’s Temple Beth Sholom, that is what spurred the creation of the Northern New Jersey Jewish Academy.

Swill, now a member of the school’s board, has been part of the venture since the idea first was broached to the Jewish Federation of Northern New Jersey several years ago.

“We were really just a collection of people in the county who were thinking we could make a regional Hebrew school,” she said. “It would save all the congregations a lot of money.”

Lisa Harris Glass, director of the federation’s Synagogue Leadership Initiative, said, “The conversation began as a result of a program [former director] Judy Beck ran — sort of like speed-dating for people interested in collaborating.”

According to Glass, synagogues came together to discuss such ideas as mergers and sharing sacred space. It was at one of the forums that the idea of a joint Hebrew school was raised.

“For a number of years, SLI was convening meetings of interested partners on a monthly basis,” she said. “Many synagogues at the table came and went throughout the process.”

Swill recalls that at early meetings to discuss a joint religious school, some synagogues favored a “spoke and hub arrangement,” where all children would attend a common school on Sundays and then each synagogue would do something in its own building one day a week.

“I didn’t like it,” she said. “I thought it was too disjointed and wouldn’t save us as much money.”

She pulled out of the discussions, but later was invited back to discuss the issue after two rabbis — Beth Sholom’s Baruch Zeilicovich and Rabbi David Fine of Ridgewood’s Temple Israel and Jewish Community Center — came up with a different plan.

That plan — which merged the Hebrew school programs of Beth Sholom and Temple Israel in 2011 — became the template for the academy’s future growth.

“It’s been a great partnership,” Swill said. “So much so that we have had three more synagogues join us this year.”

Rabbi Sharon Litwin, NNFFA’s director and the associate rabbi at Temple Israel, said that the five synagogues now making up the academy work together through a 10-member lay board. Each participating shul sends two members. In addition to Temple Beth Sholom and Temple Israel, the group now includes Congregation Beth Sholom in Teaneck, Kol HaNeshama in Englewood, and Temple Emanuel of North Jersey in Franklin Lakes.

The project was not without its challenges, many of which arose during the first year.

“There were some issues of integrating different curricula,” Litwin said, noting that “the students had learned different things at different times.” There were also issues involving social integration, since some of the students had been together since they were 5 years old.

Offering classes in grades K-7, the academy now serves 86 children, 65 of them from Temple Israel. The majority of the faculty comes from that synagogue’s Hebrew school as well.

All students attend classes at Temple Israel on Sundays, and third through seventh graders meet again on Wednesdays.

“We didn’t have to add classrooms,” Litwin said, pointing out that none of them were at or near capacity

before the new school was created. “We were all looking at our synagogue schools and seeing that the classes weren’t growing. Some were operating schools with 12 children, kind of a one-room schoolhouse for all ages and abilities. This was not as robust as we would want for a Jewish educational experience.

“We want the students to feel like part of a larger Jewish community,” she continued. “We pool our resources, so there’s now a teacher for every grade. There’s also special programming and workshops, and we can bring in special guests.”

Each synagogue contributes on a cost-per-student basis.

“There are definitely advantages, certainly for the smaller schools,” Litwin said. “It allows for community-building, and for students get to know Jewish peers their own age. It becomes a Jewish social experience as well as an educational one.” And because there is one class for every grade, “teachers can focus on the grade they’re teaching.”

“It’s no secret that the cost of Jewish education is high,” SLI’s Glass said. “Not only does that impact sustainability, but it also impacts quality. There was a ‘critical mass’ issue. Many individual schools were having to meld grades together.

“There are economies of scale available to a bigger group, and socially, it’s so much better to be with more kids,” she said. “It was, and is, the right answer for so many reasons.”

Fifth graders present their projects on B’reishit.

Rabbi Sharon Litwin

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Litwin said the school is getting “overwhelmingly positive feedback” from parents. “The main concern is sitting in traffic on [Routes] 4 and 17 on Wednesdays. But in terms of content and the experience of their kids and what they’re learning, it’s overwhelmingly positive, so they say it’s worth the schlep.”

Still, projects of this kind pose a number of challenges.“Every partner is afraid of losing its local identity,”

Glass said, but because each congregation maintains its own junior congregation, students can celebrate Shabbat in their own community. In addition, each congregation has an opportunity to host special activities on behalf of the academy.

“It’s hard to give up full control,” she said. “Collaboration is hard, emotional, visceral.” But while there are still “bumps in the road, we’re working on it. I think it can grow.” She pointed out that a recent grant from SLI will help the academy “explore how we can innovate to deal with issues unique to a collaborative school.”

Some of those issues surfaced the first year, Swill said. “We had to keep stressing to our members that it wasn’t Beth Sholom kids going to the Temple Israel Hebrew school. It’s a new entity.”

Similarly, she added, Temple Israel members had to understand that the school did not belong to them but to all NNJJA congregations.

One of the major things to be sorted out was the dichotomy between egalitarian and non-egalitarian practice.

“We had to figure out how to work in terms of tefillah,” Swill said, explaining that her synagogue, which sends

13 students to the academy, is not egalitarian. “Rabbi Sharon lays tefillin. Our girls don’t. But if they see it, we have to figure out how to explain it.”

Ultimately, she said, the board left it up to the rabbis to decide how to handle such issues.

Swill said that while her own children do not attend the academy — they all went through the Beth Sholom religious school — she is “invested emotionally” in the project.

“I want to ensure that the program we’re sending our children to is solid, that [the students] are getting the kind of education my own children got so that they’ll love being Jewish,” she said. And, she added, children will learn how things are done in various congregations “so they can walk into any Conservative synagogue and feel comfortable. It’s nice to have very full classes and lots of noise.”

Dan Unger, who is on the Temple Israel school committee and has two children in the academy — his older son graduated last year and moved on to the Bergen County High School of Jewish Studies — said NNJJA provides a benefit because “we all need more numbers. It’s nice that there’s a larger population, making it more cost effective for us and others.”

Still, while member synagogues benefit from cost savings, “the kids are [really] the ones that benefit,” he said, “spending time with other kids, having more friends, and having a graduating class where you’re being bar-mitzvahed with a bunch of kids you have grown up with.”

His children, 8 and 11, are enjoying the program.“Things are more progressive since I went to religious

school,” he said. “Kids actually look forward to it. They

have a good time.” The academy, he said, “has great teachers. When Beth Sholom joined last year, we were able to get one of their teachers, who is wonderful.”

Unger described the academy’s first year as a “learning journey — trying to understand how things work and what’s important to each congregation. Everyone is an equal partner. We have to listen to each other.”

He pointed out that participating congregations also have to respect each other’s membership.

“We have to make sure that the other member shuls don’t think that because their children are attending religious school at Temple Israel, we will try to take away their members,” he said. Indeed, “it’s part of the contract” that synagogues refrain from poaching other congregations’ members. Unger noted that congregations also have to be careful in setting dates for b’nai mitzvah services, because they now must try to avoid overlapping dates.

Academy board member Ashley Milun of Teaneck, who belongs to Congregation Beth Sholom there, sends two children to the school. Overall, he said, they are enjoying the experience. But since both children had attended a Solomon Schechter school for a few years, “my fourth grader is a little ahead of the class in Hebrew.”

He said that distance also is an issue, especially on Wednesdays, but the benefits the children gained far outweighted the disadvantages.

“One of the things they love is the social aspect — getting to know more kids of their age,” Milun said. “For them to meet other Jewish kids their age is great.” The challenge “is getting them all on the same page, accommodating a wide range of skill levels.”

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Israel and the African refugeesdebate rages over asylum policy, politics, and lessons from the shoah

Larry yudeLson

A petition circulated and signed by leading scholars of the Shoah calls on the world community

to take responsibility for the estimated 60,000 African refugees who entered Israel in recent years.

“We hope Israel will play an appropriate role in such an effort, alongside other nations that are committed to doing their fair share,” says the petition, whose signatories include three local rabbis.

The petition, however, is being criticized by some of those who have been advocating on behalf of the refugees in Israel, saying it whitewashes the Jewish state for its failure to follow United Nations procedures concerning refugees, as well as for the anti-immigrant fervor whipped up by politicians beginning last spring and continuing through this election season. (Israel is to hold national elections in a little over two weeks.)

Last week, it was reported that a 21-year-old Jewish man accused of throwing eight firebombs last April at four private homes of Africans and the yard of a kindergarten where African children were sleeping was offered a plea bargain by prosecutors that would entail six months of community service, but no prison time. No one was hurt in those attacks.

The lead force behind the petition is Rafael Medoff, director of the David Wyman Institute for Holocaust Studies in Washington. Medoff said that the petition emerged from conversations with another Shoah scholar, Yehuda Bauer of the Hebrew University in Jerusalem.

After debating the question of United States complicity in the Shoah in Israeli newspapers, the two sought common ground, Medoff said in an interview this week.

“Historians need to not only study history, but have an obligation to try to make this world a better place,” he said. “We had both expressed concern about the plight of the African refugees. Discussing the issue, we found we agreed that this is a world problem, a problem not just for Israel, and there should be a world solution.

“It’s not fair that Israel should be expected to shoulder the lion’s share of the solution to this problem, because every country in the world has the same moral responsibility to help the oppressed when they can,” Medoff continued.

“For the international community to expect Israel to take in all these refugees and then accuse Israel of racism if it doesn’t is simply unfair. The Israelis have been doing more than their fair share, by contrast with Egypt, whose border police have been shooting at many of these refugees.”

Rabbi Ronald Roth of the Fair Lawn

Jewish Center is among the local rabbis who signed Medoff’s petition.

“Israel isn’t given credit for what it is trying to do,” he said. “It’s an astonishing historical turnaround that people are literally dying to get into Israel to be safe. Other people who are persecuted around the world are finding Israel to be a refuge.”

Other area signatories include Rabbi Arthur Weiner of the Jewish Community Center of Paramus and Rabbi Eugene Korn, who lives in Bergenfield and is the U.S. director of the Institute for Jewish-Christian Understanding and Cooperation.

A petition circulated a few months ago condemning the Israeli government’s policy of “deterring asylum seekers” as “inhumane and unjust” attracted a different set of local rabbinic signers: Rabbi Michael Chernick, a professor at the Hebrew Union College – Jewish Institute for Religion, and Rabbi Rebecca Sirbu, who works for Clal: The Center for Jewish Learning and Leadership. Both live in Teaneck.

Medoff’s and Bauer’s petition looks back to the 1938 Evian Conference, where representatives from 32 countries met to discuss the plight of Jews living under Nazi rule, but refused to take in any refugees, as well as a 1979 conference, also in Evian, that was more successful in resettling refugees from Indochina.

The petition urges the international community to address the crisis of

African refugees “in the spirit of the appeal made by U.S. Vice President Walter F. Mondale at the United Nations Conference on Indochinese Refugees, held in Evian, France, in 1979. He said the countries attending the infamous 1938 Evian conference ‘failed the test of civilization’ by refusing to help Europe’s Jewish refugees, and he urged the 1979

attendees to cooperate in resolving the crisis of ‘boat people’ fleeing Indochina: ‘We face a world problem. Let us fashion a world solution.’ Those words moved governments to act. Hundreds of thousands of lives were saved.”

Those who have been advocating on behalf of the refugees, however, and particularly in the wake of increasing anti-immigrant rhetoric and violence from right-wing Israeli politicians, slam the petition as a whitewash of Israel’s moral failures in responding to the refugee situation.

“It’s the total abdication of Jewish moral responsibility and proof positive

Hunger knows no nationality as refugees line up for food in Tel Aviv. Photo courtesy

of Good PeoPle fund

that the Jewish people have learned nothing from the Shoah other than how to cynically invoke it when expedient,” said refugee advocate Daniel Sieradski, a New Milford native who now lives in Syracuse. Last spring, Sieradski drafted his own petition condemning the Israeli government’s policies, as well as the silence of Jewish organizations in the United States, which generally strongly support accepting refugees and legalizing immigration when it comes to these shores.

“These Holocaust scholars completely ignore Israel’s brutal treatment of and racist incitement against African asylum seekers, instead lavishing praise upon Israel, which has built internment camps for asylum seekers,” he said.

Sierdaski continued, “Rather than offering any words of criticism to Israel for its outrageous and inexcusable behavior…, it lays the blame at the doorstep of humanity, saying it is the world’s problem to solve, not Israel’s. While there’s an inkling of truth to that, the fact [is] that Likud is currently campaigning on expelling African asylum seekers, and the fact [is] that these Holocaust scholars have remained entirely mum in the face of that reality,” Sieradski said, adding that he was distressed by such an approach.

Said Medoff, “The majority of the people fleeing Africa are not fleeing religious or ethnic persecution. The majority are fleeing destitution, poverty, and civil war. The large majority are not fleeing genocide in Darfur — that’s a minority.

“Beyond that, Israel’s response is not at all similar to the world turning away the Jews aboard the St. Louis” who had received permission to exit Nazi Germany, but were turned away by the United States and others. “Israel has been accepting them for years. It’s only when the numbers became so large as to be unmanageable that the Israeli public began to express concern,” he said.

In 2011, the United States admitted 56,384 refugees. On a per capita basis, Israel would have to admit 1,000 refugees a year to match the United States. Instead, it admitted more than 50,000 Africans into Israel over the past several years, meaning that it well ahead of the United States per capita in admitting refugees from distressed lands.

Advocates for the Africans in Israel, however, say that Israel has failed its legal — and moral — obligations by not actually determining whether the Africans are deserving of asylum. Instead, said David Sheen, a Canadian-born Israeli journalist who publishes extensively on the topic, while the Africans have been allowed into Israel, it is not as refugees. Without refugee status, they are not allowed to work or to receive other privileges due refugees under international agreements of which Israel is a signatory, Sheen said.

In countries where emigrants from Eritrea, Sudan, and South Sudan are

“This is a world problem, a problem not just for Israel, and there should be a world solution.”

— Rafael Medoff

see Refugees page 29

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Gentiles of the Year 2012JTa sTaff

Whether they made us cheer, bang our heads against the wall, wish they were Jewish, or thank God that they’re not, this year had plenty of non-Jews who played an important role in the Jewish story. And what better time to highlight them than now, in this season of best-of lists and holiday cheer?

Begrudged mazel tovs greeted news in August that Benjamin Millepied had wed Natalie Portman, one of the most desirable Jewish women in Hollywood. Millepied, the French-born choreographer who prepped Portman for her Oscar-winning turn as a troubled dancer in the 2010 hit “Black Swan,” donned a yarmulke and wrapped himself in a tallit for the ceremony, held underneath a chuppah in Big Sur, Calif. The couple’s year-old son, Aleph, was among the wedding guests.

Thanks to Claire Danes, Americans not only have fallen in love with an adaptation of an Israeli TV show, but they’ve learned that Tel Aviv is the world’s “most in-tense party town.” Danes portrays the bipolar CIA agent Carrie Mathison on the critically acclaimed Showtime series “Homeland.” Some of the show’s second season was filmed in Israel.

After a far-right Hungarian politician called for Jews to be screened as potential security risks, the deputy speaker of the country’s parliament, Istvan Ujhelyi, led

colleagues in wearing yellow stars during a parliamenta-ry session as a sign of solidarity with the country’s Jewish community. Ujhelyi said he did not believe he had Jewish roots, but that he would be proud if it turned out he did.

When the International Olympic Committee denied

repeated requests to have a moment of silence at the 2012 London Summer Olympics honoring the 40th anni-versary of the murder of 11 Israelis at the Munich Games, NBC sportscaster Bob Costas took it upon himself to re-member the slain athletes and coaches. As the Israeli del-

Left to right, top to bottom: Benjamin Millepied, Claire Danes, Istvan ujhelyi, Bob Costas, Newt gingrich, Chaka Khan, Mohamed Morsi, Brian flynn, Ryan Parry, stephen Harper, Barack Obama. GraPhics by uri fintzy

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egation entered the stadium for the opening ceremonies, Costas summarized the controversy and then went silent for several seconds, holding his own moment of silence.

Newt Gingrich failed in his bid for the Republican presidential nomination in 2012, but not before burn-ing through millions of dollars donated by Jewish casino mogul Sheldon Adelson. He also sparked considerable outrage by referring to the Palestinians as an “invented people.” Gingrich stood his ground, however, saying he supported a negotiated peace but the onus was on the Palestinians.

After music legend Stevie Wonder backed out of a commitment to perform at a benefit for the Israel Defense Forces in Los Angeles in December, bowing to pressure from pro-Palestinian activists, the Grammy Award-winning singer Chaka Khan took his place. Khan

performed several of her signature hits at the gala, which wound up raising $14 million to support the well-being of Israeli soldiers.

Now that President Mohamed Morsi has clearly es-tablished that he’s running the show in Egypt, he must decide: Will Egypt be a threat to Israel, a reliable ally or a perennial headache? The jury’s still out, but Israel — and the world — remain transfixed.

For Brian Flynn and Ryan Parry, reporters for the British tabloid The Sun, it’s never too late for justice. The duo tracked down suspected war criminal Ladislaus Csizsik-Csatary, 97, leading to his arrest in Hungary in July on charges of helping send 15,700 Jews to their deaths during the Holocaust.

Calling Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper an unabashed Israel supporter is an understatement. In

the last few months, Harper has shuttered Canada’s em-bassy in Tehran, listed Iran as a state sponsor of terror-ism, ultimately unsuccessfully but personally pressured Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas to drop the Palestinians’ bid for statehood at the United Nations, and signed a series of defense pacts with Israel. Israeli President Shimon Peres has called him “an extraordinary friend.”

President Barack Obama’s fiercest Jewish critics assail him as undermining Israel’s interests. His staunchest acolytes say his policies may save Israel from Iran. What none of them question is the singular position of the U.S. president, whoever he may be, to influence events that will determine the Jewish future.

JTA Wire Service

formally evaluated to see whether they qualify as refugees with a reasonable fear of persecution, Sheen noted, “90 percent receive refugee status.”

Sheen said that while the petition praises Israel for its acceptance of refugees, in its history, Israel “has taken in less than 200 non-Jewish refugees.”

The issue is part of the Israeli national election campaign. Just this week, Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said, “All tens of thousands of infiltrators from Africa will be returned to their country or other countries.”

Netanyahu’s Likud-Beiteinu party is competing with the ultra-Orthodox Shas party, as well as smaller far-right parties, for the anti-African vote. The Israeli newspaper Yediot Ahronoth quoted sources in Shas as saying the anti-African vote could be worth as much as three seats in the elections later this month. The Sephardi-oriented religious party prepared — but did not publicly air — a five-minute video scapegoating refugees for crime and housing shortages, with the claim that only the party, one of whose three leaders, Eli Yishai, heads the Interior Ministry and has been one of the leading anti-refugee voices, can battle the “demographic threat” posed by the Africans.

Against this background, Sheen called Medoff’s petition “preposterous.”

“The government of Israel has signified with its words and actions that it intends not only to reduce the amount of non-Jewish African asylum seekers coming to the country; it also intends to deplete the country of those people who are living here currently,” he said.

At the same time, he added, a report from the Knesset Research Institute “said that all of the countries around here are accepting refugees to various degrees. How many Syrian refugees has Jordan taken in so far?

“Eighty percent of the refugees in the world are taken in by other third world countries. The poorest countries in the world are taking in way more than the lion’s share of refugees. This government doesn’t want to take any.”

Leonard Grob, professor emeritus at Fairleigh Dickinson University in Teaneck, is among those who signed the Evian Declaration. Grob, who still teaches one course a year at FDU, used to direct the university’s Holocaust center. He said that while it is appropriate for the nations of the world to take in the African refugees, Israel too “must heed the lessons we have learned from the Holocaust.

“Israel must do its best to provide a refuge for those who are attempting to escape from situations in which their lives are in danger.”

Grob said he disagreed with the Israeli government’s plan for the refugees.

“I realize that Israel can’t absorb every immigrant who comes across the border. But I think Israel as a country has to come to grips with different people, to welcome the stranger. It is a duty of the Jewish people, given the history of the Shoah when doors were closed throughout the world,” Grob said.

Refugees from page 8

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Sensitizing rabbisYeshiva University offers online marriage counseling course

AbigAil Klein leichmAn

A unique online course on marriage counseling for Yeshiva University-educated Orthodox rab-bis has attracted 40 participants from across

North America, Australia, and Israel. They include Benjamin Kelsen of Bergenfield’s Beis Medrash Zichron Shlomo Elimelech, Andrew Markowitz of Fair Lawn’s Congregation Shomrei Torah, and Chaim Poupko of Englewood’s Congregation Ahavath Torah.

The course, offered by Yeshiva University’s Center for the Jewish Future and its affiliate, Rabbi Isaac Elchanan Rabbinical Theological Seminary, aims to develop communal rabbis’ skills and techniques in assisting couples through every stage of relationship, from dating and marriage to crisis, divorce, or death.

The first of its kind, the yearlong series explores the rabbi’s role in various situations and considers how he can collaborate effectively with couples, their families, and mental health professionals in formulating and implementing a counseling plan.

“A lot of young couples are moving into Fair Lawn, and I wanted to gain the tools to become the best spiritual leader I can for my shul,” said Markowitz, 30, who also teaches at Yeshivat Noam in Paramus.

His congregation is paying half the fee for the course, even though counseling is not a formal part of Markowitz’s job description.

“This course teaches me to be more sensitive to the needs of my congregants, so that when someone asks a question, I can better understand the dynamics of the marriage and become closer to my congregants and more effective as a rabbi,” he said. “Together with my wife, I try to keep an open-door policy.”

When Markowitz was a rabbinical student at RIETS Manhattan campus, he took courses in pastoral psychology. He elected to further his knowledge at Israel’s Puah Institute, which deals with infertility issues in Jewish law, while he was at the university’s Jerusalem campus for two additional years. Last year, CJF teamed up with the Puah Institute for a yearlong online course on the issues surrounding infertility.

The current course, Markowitz said, is providing him

with more in-depth information and new material as well. That includes a recent presentation by social worker Lisa Twerski, an expert on spousal abuse in the Jewish community.

Rabbi Levi Mostofsky, director of RIETS CJF Continuing Rabbinic Education and Support, said that many communal rabbis are interested in enhancing their rabbinic education, but lack the time and money to come to conferences. “This course provides a cost- and time-effective way for rabbis to update their skills in a way that will allow them to serve their constituents better,” he said.

“We have been supporting our rabbis in numerous ways for years, and there is consistent interest in nuanced instruction from trained professionals,” Mostofsky added. “With the launch of our program in October, rabbis have an open platform to discuss and learn about every aspect of the Jewish marital relationship in real-time from the top experts in the field.”

Before the first webinar, each participant received a thorough selection of reference materials, related articles, and assignments on the course topics. Altogether, the group will meet virtually for 17 lectures and discussions; it also will meet twice in person for more intensive all-day seminars in New York.

Between classes, participants interact with one another via the course’s dedicated online forum and schedule offline conversations with the instructors, who are leading mental health professionals and authorities in Jewish marital law.

“This course represents a true paradigm shift, both in the ways the topics will be presented and taught as well as the way in which the rabbis will be accessing the information,” CJF’s senior scholar, Rabbi Dr. Jacob J. Schacter of Teaneck, said. “In addition, by delving into important, but often ignored, topics — such as abuse, blended families, adoption, illness and death, homosexuality — participants will be well prepared to formulate new approaches to answer their congregants’ most challenging questions and help find real solutions for painful and distressing problems.”

Rabbi Kenneth Brander, dean of the Center for the Jewish Future, gives a webinar to participating rabbis. CJF

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‘Disappearing in plain sight’alex witchel addresses her mother’s memory loss at JFs program

Marla Cohen

By anyone’s measure, Alex Witchel is an

accomplished woman. A writer for the New York Times and the author of four books, she has had a long, successful career. Her work has been published in magazines including New York, Vogue, and Elle.

By her own estimate, as she writes in her recently published memoir, she is used to taking charge and fixing things.

That is, until her mother was stricken with dementia. That was something she couldn’t fix.

“I thought I could find doctors who could stop the process, and the process cannot be stopped,” Witchel said in a recent phone interview. “If you can’t change it, you have to change yourself, your attitude, your expectations. It doesn’t make it any less sad, but I’m not in this race against time any longer. Time won.”

Witchel details her mother’s journey through diagnosis, denial, and decline in “All Gone: A Memoir of My Mother’s Dementia, With Refreshments.” In the book, Witchel describes her mother’s odyssey into oblivion. Starting in 2000 with small slips and hiccups in her

mother’s behavior, the book ends with Witchel’s grudging acceptance of her mother’s situation.

“I guess I’ve made an uneasy peace with it,” Witchel said. “It’s something I understand intellectually. I go back and forth between thinking that something I do will make a difference, even while acknowledging that it doesn’t.”

Witchel will talk about her personal

“If you can’t change it, you have to change yourself, your attitude, your expectations. It doesn’t make it any less sad, but I’m not in this race against time any longer. Time won.”

— Alex Witchel

JFS launches caregiver programMarla Cohen

Nina Wolff was a vibrant, active woman, who loved to play golf and cards. She had an active social life in Florida. But over the course of nine

years, starting in the early 2000s, dementia robbed her of that life. Finally she was bedridden, hooked up to a feeding tube, with aides watching her around the clock.

Her adult children, George, Robert, and Alma, struggled with the toll the disease took on their mother. They struggled equally with the toll their mother’s disease took on their father, Samuel, who insisted on caring for his wife at their home in Verona.

“We saw what it was doing to him and it was difficult for us during the whole, gradual decline,” George Wolff said. Even though they lived close by, it seemed there was always a problem, and finding all the information and the doctors they needed was not always a smooth process.

“My dad felt kind of alone as a primary caregiver,” Wolff said. “It really aged him as well as aging my mom. The disease really affected him as much as it did her, and we found that we were kind of adrift.”

Samuel died first, when he was in his 90s, and Nina died shortly after her husband did. The three Wolff children decided they wanted to do something in their parents’ memories that would help other people who

are struggling with similar problems. Last fall, they made a gift to Jewish Family Service of North Jersey, which established the Sam and Nina Wolff Caregivers Program.

The caregiver support program will provide both practical and emotional support to people caring for an elderly relative who is suffering from dementia.

Services provided will include counseling, family consultations, support groups for spouses and adult children, and referrals to community resources that JFS does not have. That’s according to Leah Kauffman, the agency’s executive director. The money is meant to seed the program over two years, allowing JFS to hire professionals to get it off the ground, she said.

There are a host of issues with which caregivers must cope, Kaufman said. It can be difficult for relatives who live far away to arrange and manage care. Home safety is a concern, and so is finding the rights sort of care, whether it is in the patient’s home or in an assisted living residence. Emotional issues are tough as well, as spouses and adult children watch someone they love become less and less capable.

“There are bereavement issues, as you watch someone you’ve lived with your entire life, and slowly see this person disappearing,” Kaufman said.

The idea of a resource center to honor their parents’ memory appealed to the Wolff siblings. The program could provide an all-in-one experience for people coping with the stress of caring for someone with dementia, George Wolff said.

“We wanted to have one place families, especially caregivers, could go to find the resources they need — social workers, doctors, to help them out even though this is usually a battle that doesn’t end well,” he said. “The caregiver really has to feel there are resources out there to help them. That’s what we wanted to put out there, that this is a place to go to for families facing this terrible, terrible disease.”

Robert Wolff, left, and George Wolff receive a plaque from Paula Shaiman, past president of JFS of North Jersey, at JFS’s annual meeting last May.

Alex Witchel Fred r. Conrad



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BrieFly local

Lubavitch on the Palisades dinner and auction honors three couplesLubavitch on the Palisades in Tenafly will host its 17th annual gala dinner and auction, celebrating “From Imagination to Creation,” at the Rockleigh Country Club on Sunday, January 13 at 5 p.m. The evening will honor Jeanella and Lawrence Blenden of Tenafly, Stacey and Nelson Braff of Demarest, and Yael and Joseph Chamay of Closter for their devotion and dedication to the organization.

The three couples also are active in the larger Jewish community. Lawrence Blenden spearheaded the

effort to extend the Tenafly eruv into northern Tenafly and southern Cresskill. Nelson Braff volunteers with organizations including ChaiLifeline/Camp Simcha and the Brooklyn College Hillel Foundation, and Stacey Braff also volunteers for Jewish Federation of Northern New Jersey. The Chamays are active members of Lubavitch on the Palisades, where they volunteer for activities.

For information, call (201) 871-1152 or go to www.chabadlubavitch.org.

Bergen County YJCC Sharks capture all-star swim meetThe Bergen Sharks, the Bergen County YJCC’s competitive swim team, took first place with an overall team score of 3715 in the YM-YWHA swim league all-star meet at the Raritan Bay YMCA in Perth Amboy on December 9. Second place went to the JCC of Central New Jersey in Scotch Plains. Teams from the Kaplen JCC on the Palisades in Tenafly, the JCC of Middlesex County in Edison, the Shimon and Sara Birnbaum JCC in Bridgewater, the YM-

YWHA of Union County in Union, and the JCC MetroWest in West Orange also competed. The Bergen Sharks broke seven all-star meet records, along with eight of their own team records. Michael Seeback is the Sharks’ head coach; he is assisted by Alex Laski, Sayaka Cullens, and Nicole Calianese. The team, made up of more than 170 swimmers from 5 to 18 years old, also is supported by a large group of parent volunteers.

Lawrence and Jeanella Blenden Nelson and Stacey Braff Yael and Joseph Chamay

Teen choir’s regional retreat will ring out in TeaneckHaZamir: the International Jewish High School Choir will hold its annual winter retreat at Congregation Beth Sholom in Teaneck on January 20 and 21. More than 150 teens from HaZamir chapters in the Northeast will join Bergen County teens for rehearsals with conductors from around the country. On Monday, January 21, at 12:30 p.m., the community is invited to attend an open rehearsal at Beth Sholom.

HaZamir is a network of choral chapters in the United States and Israel. Individual chapters rehearse weekly so all the singers learn the same repertoire, and then they gather to perform that repertoire at regional, national, and international retreats. The group’s culminating performance is a gala concert at Jazz at Lincoln Center’s Rose Hall in New York City on March 17.

The Bergen County chapter of HaZamir is conducted by Cantor Ronit Wolff Hanan and coordinated by Hana Prashker and Elaine Mason. It meets on Sunday afternoons at Congregation Beth Sholom. For information, call (201) 833-2620 or go to www.zamirchoralfoundation.org.

HaZamir’s international director, Vivian Lazar, and its founder and director, Matthew Lazar. HaZamir is a project of the Zamir Choral Foundation. Courtesy CBs

experience at a program hosted by the Jewish Family Service of North Jersey at 7:30 p.m. on Thursday, January 17. The talk, to be held at Temple Beth Rishon in Wyckoff, will mark the official launch of JFS’s Jewish Sam and Nina Wolff Caregivers Program. The cost is $18 per family by January 14, and $25 at the door. Call 973-595-0111 or email [email protected].

As the adult child tasked with shepherding her mother through doctor’s appointments, finding a home health aide, and overseeing her mother’s care, Witchel had a front seat to her mother’s decline. Barbara Witchel’s dementia sneaked up on the family. At first, it was easy to ignore. But after a while, small things — she called Witchel’s stepson “Nate” instead of “Nat”; she had always been a fastidious dresser but by now her belt was askew on her dress; she delivered the same lecture delivered twice at work — all started adding up.

Witchel’s unsentimental yet heartbreaking story of observing her very vibrant and capable mother, a college professor, go through the “torturous process of disappearing in plain sight,” toggles between scenes of her mother’s decline and scenes of her own childhood, many bound up in the rituals of cooking “basic 1950s housewife food, kosher division.”

The book includes recipes at chapter breaks that include sweet and sour meatballs, potato latkes, kreplach, and a foolproof meatloaf that serves Witchel as a sort of Ur-text of mother love. While her mother doesn’t seem to derive much pleasure in cooking, and does it in

a dutiful way throughout the book, Witchel enjoys the task and the memories it evokes. The dishes are homey, even homely, but the sort that might take you back to childhood and more carefree times.

“My mother never really liked to cook, but she was a good cook and we liked it when she cooked and when she cooked my grandmother’s recipes,” Witchel said. The meatloaf, in particular, stands in as a timeless anchor in the book, as if making it one more time, making it just right, would make things all better.

The meatloaf “was one of those things that didn’t change,” Witchel said. “And every time I made her meatloaf it smelled exactly the same way, it tasted exactly the same, and looked exactly the same.

“I could make the house smell the way my mother’s house smelled. It was a guaranteed way of evoking her and the power of being with her, through the food, since I couldn’t do that way through conversations.”

Witchel’s mother’s dementia was the result of undetected small strokes and the scar tissue they left behind. Unlike Alzheimer’s disease, the dementia is not supposed to be progressive. However, Barbara Witchel’s dementia grew worse. Today, she has little sense of time and often cannot remember her daughter’s name.

Witchel sought help through a social worker, who called for a family meeting. As the only one of four siblings not to have her own children, Witchel ended up charged with the task of taking care of their mother.

It is a job that took its toll, as Barbara declined and

Witchel, used to feeling super-capable and adept, foundered as a solution eluded her. She could not have imagined at the outset what it would mean that her mother literally would lose her mind.

And while she could still hold onto the past, especially through cooking, the future looked grim to Witchel. The disease stole her mother. Still, Witchel visits her mother, monthly. The daughter takes her mother to the hair salon and the two get their hair done together.

“Certainly nothing erases our past, but it was more an erasing of the future,” Witchel said. Her mother “couldn’t make plans for tomorrow. She couldn’t make plans for [the next] 15 minutes. The things she likes, she still likes, and the things she didn’t like she still doesn’t like. But she can’t articulate it.

“It’s not about losing the past. She is still the same person, but she certainly is diminished.”

Who: alex witchel

What: talking about her new book, in “all Gone: a Memoir of My Mother’s dementia, with refreshments”

Where: temple Beth rishon, 585 russell ave., wyckoff

When: thursday, January 17, at 7:30 p.m.

Why: to launch the Jewish Family service of north Jersey’s sam and nina wolff Caregivers Program

How: For information, call 973-595-0111 or email [email protected].

How much: $18 per family by January 14; $25 per family after then, and at the door


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JANUARY 27

OF NORTHERN NEW JERSEYJewish Federation

JFNNJ.ORG/SUPERSUNDAYfor more information contact Dana Garay

201-820-3937 • [email protected]

sign up to make calls!

THE STRENGTH OF A PEOPLE. THE POWER OF COMMUNITY.

Howard Chernin | Matt hew LibienAmy Shafron

Super Sunday Chairs

START OFF THE NEW YEAR WITH A TOUCHDOWNON

Disappointment and an opportunity

A new year has begun on a sour note.Normally, this newspaper does not take

political sides, and we are not actually taking one now. We leave that to our columnists — especially Shammai Engelmayer, who usually can be counted upon to be left of center and Democratic, and Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, who is more attuned to the right of center and Republican. While we often comment on issues, we try to avoid either criticizing or supporting one party over another. Partisanship is not our function.

This time, however, we may appear partisan to some, but we have little choice. Our community, like so many others, was severely hurt by Superstorm Sandy. Our communal social service agencies have been taxed to the maximum in trying to deal with the aftermath of that horrific storm.

We are now at the height of the winter season, and parts of this country have already seen a series of dev-astating snowstorms. While we have seen some snow, we have been spared the worst — for now. Who is to say, however, what will happen next week, or next month? Who will come to the aid of the victims of a future storm this winter if our social service agencies lack sufficient re-sources to do so because they expended so much of what they had on Sandy relief?

Of course, all of us were assured, the federal govern-ment would help foot the bill. There would be funds to help the victims of Hurricane Sandy, and so our social service agencies would be in a better position to deal with future storms and the devastations those might create.

Yet as we in northern New Jersey and throughout the tristate area went to bed late Tuesday evening, it was to the news that the House of Representatives declined to

take up an emergency relief bill as the current legislative session came to an end. That means that a new Congress must begin the process all over again. Considering that the new Congress opened in the second half of this week, only to adjourn again for two more weeks, only then to begin the serious working of creating legislation, includ-ing relief bills, what the House has done has put our com-munal resources in serious jeopardy.

This may sound as if it is a partisan argument, and it is in the sense that it holds the so-called “tea party” responsible and the tea party, which appears to have a stranglehold on the Republican House leadership, surely is partisan. It must be noted, however, that in our area of northern New Jersey and throughout the region, Sandy relief is not a partisan issue. Democrats and Republicans are united; liberals and conservatives are united.

It has been said that the Congress just ended was one of the least productive and most partisan in the his-tory of this country. Regardless of whether that is true, there is no question that in its final act, the House of Representatives, at least, was the most irresponsible leg-islative chamber in decades, if not in the entire history of this country.

As such, we once again renew our urging that people here donate to their local Jewish family service, and to give as generously as possible to the Jewish Federation of Northern New Jersey during its upcoming Super Sunday campaign on January 27. It is clear, or at least it should be, that the only people we can depend upon to help us in a crisis is ourselves.

What a terrible way to begin 2013. Yet if we all step up to the plate, it may also be a truly wonderful way to start a new secular year.

Our Israeli election wish list

While we are on the subject of political cam-paigns, there is one in Israel that is coming to a conclusion. Voters there will choose a new

government in a little over two weeks from now.We have our own wish list for what we would like to

see that new government accomplish.First and foremost, we hope the new government will

commit itself actively to protecting the rights of all Jews to pray at the Western Wall according to their own tradi-tions, to sit wherever they choose on public transporta-tion, and to dress as their own consciences allow.

With that, we also hope that the new government will find ways to get all of Israel’s able-bodied young men and women to engage in national service after high school, whether in the military or in some other way. Israel lives in too precarious a region for any one group to refuse to do its share.

We also hope the new government will actively com-mit itself to protecting the rights and granting asylum to people fleeing religious, ethnic, and political persecu-

tion, whether from Africa or elsewhere. We are troubled by some of the rhetoric coming from political parties on the right in Israel regarding the African refugees. Israel is a small country, to be sure. It cannot absorb tens of thou-sands of people fleeing persecution, but it also should not turn its back on refugees the way the world time and again turned its back on us. We surely should not be bragging about doing so in political campaigns.

Finally, of course, we hope the new government will pursue peace actively, despite the fact that at the mo-ment, at least, there does not seem to be a legitimate partner for peace on the other side. As John F. Kennedy said in his inaugural address 52 years ago this month, “Let us never negotiate out of fear, but let us never fear to negotiate.”

How we can make peace with an implacable enemy is beside the point. What is the point is that we already are at peace with our friends. We only make peace with our enemies. “Who,” says the Psalmist, “is the person desir-ous of life…? One who wishes for peace and pursues it.”

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JewishStandard

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Editor EmeritaRebecca Kaplan Boroson

To judge a Jew justlyShmuley Boteach

I do not normally use a column to respond to a letter, and I understand this newspaper’s

reluctance to publish such a rebut-tal, but for every rule there is an exception. Recently, a vicious let-ter to the editor attacked philan-thropist Sheldon Adelson. A sec-ond letter attacked me. Together, the two letters spell out all that is wrong in the increasingly rancid political climate of the modern-day United States, and the divisiveness of Jewish communal politics. They combine to create that exception to the rule.

In essence, the letter-writer who attacked Adelson did so because the philanthropist is a Republican and contributes to Republican causes. Here is a message to that writer: The United States is a democracy and a citi-

zen can affiliate with, and indeed support, any party he or she favors. A Jew can be a Democrat, an

Independent, and yes, even a Republican. Not one of those three is more Jewishly legitimate than the other, and any suggestion otherwise is a sad abuse of religion for political purposes.

We do not live in Iran. The United States has more than one party, thank God, and I salute Jews on both sides of the aisle who are politically active for the good of this nation and our community.

I can care less if Jews are Democrats or Republicans. I have my own personal preference, as we all do. The hatred that is being increasingly shown toward Jews who are political conservatives, however, undermines our community’s belief in the vibrancy of democracy.

I am a Jew who just ran for the Congress of the United States as a Republican, but who spent much of the campaign criticizing my own party for its social sexual obsession and its focus on abortion, gay marriage, and contraception to the exclusion of a national debate on divorce, materialism, and an increasing culture of nar-cissism, lovelessness, and loneliness. Yet there it was, a letter in last week’s issue of The Jewish Standard, calling me “American Jewry’s premier narcissist.” This is very sad.

Why am I such a horrible person? Because, wrote the letter-writer, “shamefully, [I] said nothing about guns” in a column following the Newtown horror, but instead offered a “religious” endorsement of Republican and National Rifle Association pro-gun policies.

This week, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach’s newest book, “The Fed-up Man of Faith: Challenging God in the Face of Tragedy and Suf-fering,” goes on sale.


editorial

trUtH reGardleSS oF CoNSeQUeNCeS

Op-ed

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editorialExcuse me? For the record, in the column that so of-

fended this letter-writer, I wrote, “Yes, guns make it easier for rage to become deadly — and only cowards would refuse to hold a national conversation now about gun laws, wherever that leads.” The letter-writer, however, has no problem villifying me because I am a Republican. He assumes that every Jewish Republican is an extremist nut who has abandoned Jewish liberalism, and therefore is fair game.

This appalling attitude was taken to an extreme by the Adelson attacker, who wrote that the victims of the Shoah would turn in their graves if they knew that Adelson is be-ing honored by Yad Vashem for giving tens of millions of dollars in their memory. Such words are an abuse of the memory of our martyred Six Million for crass partisan reasons.

Yes, Adelson gave a million dollars to an independent superPAC that supported my campaign. By fraudulently claiming that Adelson “proceeded to promote politicians ... who would advance his views,” the letter-writer errs against both donor and recipient. The Adelsons asked me for absolutely nothing, and, as per the law, I had no contact with the PAC and no control over what it did with the money it received. Adelson’s and the PAC’s generosity are legend. They are famous for supporting candidates who fight for Israel. With my 25-year history of fighting Israel-haters in live debates and the world’s media, I was proud and grateful to receive their support.

The letter condemns Adelson for the tens of millions he donates to Birthright, accusing him of using the pro-gram to “brainwash” Jewish youth. In doing so, the writer demonstrates not just his ignorance of how Birthright operates — through about 25 different independent con-tractors with whom donors have no contact — but his contempt for the indelible connection Birthright fosters between hundreds of thousands of young Jews and the ancient Jewish homeland.

This is how far we are prepared to take political parti-sanship within our community.

People can have selfless motivations when they give tzedakah. We ought to reject such cynical views of char-ity and instead salute and champion anyone — anyone, regardless of political convictions, from Sheldon Adelson to George Soros — who supports Israel and the memory of our k’doshim, our holy martyrs. Unfortunately, Soros, a man much admired by Democrats on the left, strangely does not support Israel or memorials to the victims of the Shoah, even though he himself is a refugee from the Nazi tyrany. There are plenty of Jewish Democrats who do, however, and I salute them all. Michael Steinhardt, the founder of Birthright Israel, is a founder of the Democratic Leadership Council, and like Sheldon Adelson he is a man I revere because of his lifelong dedi-cation to the Jewish people.

The politics of it all be damned.I am Republican, yes, but coming from the worlds of

academia and media, most of my friends are Democrats and liberals. I do not give a toss what a person’s politics are. I care about his or her character, her or his goodness, the person’s dedication to a higher good, and whether there is courage and righteousness behind this individ-ual’s convictions. How shameful that in the Jewish com-munity anyone should be judged first by the letter “D” or “R” in front of their name. Sheldon Adelson gives more money to Jewish causes than any man alive. His love for, and devotion to, Israel and Jewish causes should be cel-ebrated and emulated, regardless of his politics.

Whether Republican or Democrat, conservative or liberal, those who make the defense of Israel and the future of the Jewish people one of their foremost priori-ties should be feted as heroes in our community. Mean-spirited politically-driven critics ought to hold their pens before attacking fellow Jews with such unmitigated vitriol.

We have a right to disagree, but there is no warrant for being disagreeable.

Take Iran’s words literallyBen cohen

It often seems like there are two Irans.There’s the Iran deemed by western

political leaders and diplomats to be a rational agent with whom it’s possible to negotiate over that country’s nuclear am-bitions. It’s a common position on both sides of the Atlantic. In America, former Nebraska senator Chuck Hagel, currently the object of much speculation over his prospects for being appointed the Obama administration’s next Secretary of Defense, has been an ardent advocate of talks with the Iranian regime. An op-ponent of tougher sanctions on Tehran, back in 2007 Hagel urged President George W. Bush to engage in direct nego-tiations with the mullahs.

And in Europe, the EU’s foreign policy chief, Catherine Ashton, has gone out of her way to praise Iran’s “construc-tive and useful” approach to negotiations, at the same time advocating for more talks.

But there’s also another Iran — a country whose lead-ership is possessed by an apocalyptic messianism, that loudly incites genocide against Israel, and that is addi-tionally regarded by some conservative Arab states as an existential threat.

That second Iran was displayed in all its hideous glory in the aftermath of the massacre at the Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Conn., during which gunman Adam Lanza slaughtered 20 young children and six staff members. Except that, according to the Iranian regime’s English-language mouthpiece, Press TV, Lanza was a “fall guy” for the real authors of the massacre: Israeli “death squads” angered by the recent U.N. vote granting Palestine non-member status at the international body.

The originator of this repulsive conspiracy theory, Mike Harris of the anti-Semitic website “Veterans Today,” was encouraged by Press TV’s presenter as he laid the blame on “Zionists” not just for the Newtown horror, but also for the shootings of Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords and 18 others in Tucson, Ariz., in January 2011. Harris also ranted about the “filth” put out by “Zionist-controlled” Hollywood, and in a nod to Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, he said that he wants “Israel off the face of the earth.” The U.S. Congress, he asserted, is “bought and paid for by the Israeli lobby in the U.S.”

Here’s the point: By giving Harris an unchallenged platform just hours after the funeral of 6-year-old Noah Pozner, a Jewish victim of Lanza’s, the Iranian regime, wearing its Press TV hat, was deliberately and sadistically rejoicing in America’s national trauma. Remember the scenes of celebration in the Muslim world after the 9/11 atrocities? This episode was disturbingly similar.

I, for one, may have been disgusted by what I saw, but I wasn’t surprised. Anti-Americanism and anti-Semitism always have been bedfellows, never more so than in the imagination of the Iranian regime.

Yet the question remains: how do we reconcile an apparently rational Iran, concerned with its national interests, with the Iran motivated by loathing of Western cultures, values and peoples?

Foreign policy realists — those who think that a state’s

actions, not its words, are what really counts — would counsel us to ignore such inflam-matory statements. It’s just the Iranians let-ting off steam, they would say, or playing to the anti-American gallery. It doesn’t really mean anything, and it certainly won’t affect their “constructive and useful” approach to the nuclear negotiations.

Actually, if I was an Iranian leader, I’d feel weirdly insulted by that approach. I would counter that as an adult, my views should be respected as genuinely held, however out-landish or shocking they might be.

In some ways, the villains of this particular piece are not the Iranians, who are com-pletely candid about their opinions, but those

Western voices who think that nonetheless we can negoti-ate with them in good faith. True, the Iranians have lied to us for almost a decade when it comes to their nuclear pro-gram, but why would they do anything else? The idea that Iran basically is an intelligent child given to the occasional tantrum is, in this context, a far more troubling deceit.

Now consider that on January 16, negotiators from the International Atomic Energy Agency are scheduled to visit Tehran for a new round of discussions. Yukiya Amano, the shrewd diplomat in charge of the IAEA, already has pointed out a number of major stumbling blocks that are likely to arise. These include Iran’s demand that once IAEA questions on a particular issue have been addressed, the matter should be considered closed. Tehran also is insist-ing on access to Western intelligence files on the military uses of its ostensibly civilian nuclear program. Finally, there’s the established Iranian strategy of playing for time — as one Western diplomat told Reuters, “We really want to avoid a structured approach that is simply a gateway to further process.”

Continued “process,” however, suits the Iranians, be-cause they have no intention of reaching a compromise that would prevent the weaponization of their nuclear program. Why? Well, it’s simple. They hate us and ev-erything we stand for, and they know that possessing a nuclear weapon is the best way of defying us. If the Tehran regime were a good faith negotiating partner, it would not authorize its media outlets to crow over the Newtown murders.

Finally, there’s an additional question which advocates of negotiations should ask themselves: Why do we not take Iran’s insults seriously? Is it because we have low ex-pectations of Muslims to begin with? That while we can never presume that they’ll say what’s right, they can prob-ably be persuaded to act in their own interests?

I suspect that is the case. And that, plainly, is a form of racism that, ironically, enables the Iranians to promote their anti-Semitism and anti-Americanism with impunity.

I don’t, therefore, assume that anything positive will come from further negotiations. But I would request that Western negotiators do the Iranians the honor of taking their words — all of their words — at face value.

JNS.org Wire Service

Ben Cohen writings on Jewish affairs and Middle Eastern poli-tics have been published in Commentary, the New York Post, Ha’aretz, Jewish Ideas Daily, and many other publications.

Sonia Labboun, a cor-respondent for Iranian Press TV broadcasts from Puerta del Sol, Madrid, during the Spanish protests in May 2011. Kadellar/WiKimedia Commons.

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No limitation on pain from abuseRabbi Pruzansky knows precious little about the crime of child abuse, and how it intrinsically causes shame and denial within the victim (“Blog post on abuse reports sparks debate,” December 28). No complaint is untimely or unwar-ranted. The very nature of the offense in-hibits a timely response, especially when the abuser uses his position of power to threaten retaliation. If Rabbi Pruzansky wishes to do a service to our community he should, instead, issue a more enlight-ened response.

Bruce EgertHackensack

Filing civil claims against abusersIn “Blog post on abuse reports sparks debate” (December 28) there was a discussion about whether there is any redeeming value of alleged victims of

abuse of yesteryear coming forward now “to prosecute through the media” their alleged abusers. Given that criminal prosecution due to a statute of limita-tions has lapsed, the merits of such “prosecution” was debated on the pages of your newspaper.

Yet may I point that to this very day, both on halachic as well as legal grounds, there may remain grounds for filing civil claims for damages against these alleged abusers. From a legal standpoint, in Georgia, Illinois, and New York there are statutes or case law that expressly provide that if a claim is time barred in court, it also would be time barred in an arbitration such as a bet din proceeding. Consequently, such claims could not be filed in order to be arbi-trated. However, in other states, such as California, Connecticut, Florida, North Carolina, Ohio, and Washington, there exists a rule that a statute of limitation is inapplicable to arbitration proceed-ings, such as batei din. And, therefore, to this very day, should the abuse have transpired in these states, there still would be grounds for filing civil claims for damages, and should the panel ren-der an award it would be enforceable in

civil court.For the halachic grounds for fil-

ing a damage (nezikin) claim against spousal abusers as well as child abus-ers in batei din, I refer the reader to my article, which can be found at www.yutorahorg. In fact, approximately a year and half ago, a parent filed a damage claim against a teacher who allegedly abused his child in a New York bet din. More recently, a wife filed suit in a West Coast bet din against her husband, who has admitted engaging in spousal rape and the physical abuse of his wife. And generally halachah does not recognize a statute of limitations regarding such damage claims

During the last year, alleged acts of child abuse have surfaced in London, Sydney, Jerusalem and Ashdod as well as in Monsey and Brooklyn, Elizabeth, West Orange, and Teaneck. In some instances, the alleged abuse has been reported to civil authorities. However, in many cases victims and or their families have cho-sen to refrain from reporting the abuse. In other instances, institutions such as schools, youth organizations, and syna-gogues continue to protect the identity of these pedophiles.

“Awaken you slumberers from your sleep.” And then use the civil as well as halachic institutions that are readily available in order to prevent any future endangerment of the children and grandchildren of our communities.

Ronnie WarburgTeaneck

Trial by mediaHaving followed the Duke lacrosse case closely, let me say that while I sympa-thize with those who have actually suf-fered abuse, I have also seen how “trial by media” can ruin lives and reputa-tions. Perhaps a middle course would be acceptable, but with the proviso that the scriptural injunction to punish false accusers is also followed: Give the false accuser the same sentence the accused would have received (Deuteronomy 19:18-20). And in that way, the scripture says, the rest of the people will hear of this and fear, and never again will such an evil thing be done in the land. At present we treat most false accusers as emotionally disturbed, and send them

We must address the intersection of mental illness and gun violencelori WeinStein

WASHINGTON — Twenty-six lives were lost in Newtown in a sliver of time, and another community was shattered by vio-lence. These lives of beautiful potential lie like shards of glass on the floor of our na-tional conscience.

While we grieve as a nation, it is impera-tive that we engage in a national discourse about gun control and the need for im-proved access to mental health services.

Gun violence and mental illness inter-twine in ways that are dangerous and can be deadly.

Few understand that as well as the families, friends, and advocates of domestic violence victims, with whom Jewish Women’s International has been working for years.

The devastation in Connecticut is not an isolated incident. We see the intersection between domestic violence and gun violence all too often. Every day, three women are murdered by their intimate partners, and guns are the murder weapon in the majority of cases. In

2010 alone, more than 300 women were shot and killed either by their husbands or intimate acquaintances during the course of an argument. An abuser’s access to fire-arms drastically increases the likelihood of homicide.

President Obama’s speech about the massacre in Newtown amounts to nothing less than a clarion call to action. We must seize this opportunity to come together as citizens and as a nation to enact mean-ingful legislation that will outlaw assault

weapons and high-capacity magazines, will keep guns out of the hands of those who will use them to commit crimes, and will strengthen and expand background checks for purchasers. This is not a radical ideology but a commonsense practicality for a country that has sacri-ficed too many of our loved ones to gun violence.

Woven into this call to action is an urgent appeal to address the intersection between mental illness and gun violence. We must support efforts to give families the tools to treat loved ones who have a proclivity toward

violence. We also must provide expanded resources for mental health professionals, and most importantly, we must ensure that appropriate mental health policies are in place and funded appropriately.

In the past few years, we have had many opportuni-ties to come together as a nation. But this time is differ-ent. This time, we as citizens must lead. We must use the power of our voices and the strength of our numbers to ensure that legislation is enacted early in the 113th Congress.

Left to its own devices and without our active engage-ment, there is a strong likelihood that the legislative process will break down once again in Congress. Every member of Congress who believes that now is the time to pass life-saving legislation needs our support and our commitment. We must be committed to working along-side Congress and the administration to enact sensible but effective gun control legislation.

JTA Wire Service

Lori Weinstein is the executive director of Jewish Women’s International.

Letters

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17 Jewish standard JanUarY 4, 2013 Jewish standard JanUarY 4, 2013 17

for treatment (if even that). There is very little downside to making a false ac-cusation; but, as Dennis Prager noted, “the rape of a name is also a rape.” False accusations should be understood as criminal acts, capable of inflicting tre-mendous harm and they should be re-sponded to accordingly. And that might go a little way toward protecting those who are innocent.

R. B. ParrishPhoenix, Arizona

Frishman’s fringes and tallit trendsI applaud Rabbi Elyse Frishman’s cour-age (gevura) in donning a tallit at the Kotel plaza (“Furor over Frishman’s fringes,” December 28).

There was a time when Reform con-gregations forbade Jewish men (let alone women) from wearing tallitot in their temples. So now the shoe is on the other foot. Reform women wish to observe the mitzvah of tallit, and the Orthodox are telling them no thanks, please don’t join us. In essence, if you are a women, this is a mitzvah that is forbidden to you. My understanding of halachah, imperfect as it is, tells me that time-bound mitzvot such as tallit/tzitzit are not forbidden, but that is a subject for another letter.

On the other hand, I was confused by certain aspects of the story. The cover picture shows three women pray-ing with a coffee vending machine in the background. Was this the place where they chose to pray Shacharit with others? Or was the picture taken somewhere else? The picture with the article showed five women wearing their tallitot outside the police station. Why would someone wear a tallit at that time and in that place?

In fact, I object to the politicization of tallit; wearing one outside a police station does not fulfill the time-bound commandment to put on tallit for morn-ing prayers. I would no sooner put on a tallit in the middle of a rock concert than at a police station.

It is time for all sides of this argument to step back and remember when and why we are commanded. It is to remem-ber the covenant and to be holy. Ladies, please wear your tallitot for tefilla (prayers). Reform brethren, we should all welcome your participation in this mitzvah. And come to think of it, how about tefillin?

Eric WeisWayne

Women of the Wall: Rude and crudePlease let me state several opinions regarding the arrest of the members of the women’s prayer group at the Kotel (“Furor over Frishman’s fringes,” December 28).

First of all, the arrest was overkill.

The police could have escorted these women over to Robinson’s Arch where they could have conducted any religious service they wanted legally. The arrest gave these women the victim status they so richly wanted.

Secondly, just like the other Jewish holy places in Israel, the Kotel is an Orthodox synagogue. The reason is that one quarter of the Jews are Orthodox and less than 1 percent are either Conservative or Reform. Even most of the remaining 75 percent prefer an Orthodox synagogue and Orthodox rit-ual when they observe. Hence acts such as the wearing of a tallis or the reading of the Torah are correctly perceived as a thumb in their eye by Orthodox Jews or an act of American Jewish cultural im-perialism by non-Orthodox Israelis. The women doing this are not budding Rosa Parks but rude tourists.

After having said this, I do believe that non-Orthodox Jews should have better place at the Kotel rather than Robinson’s Arch. However, the way to do that is to have dialogue with the Orthodox both in Israel and in the diaspora, not the com-mission of unilateral acts.

Alan Mark LevinFair Lawn

Pollard must be freedThe Jewish Standard’s December 21 cov-er story, “What the CIA Said,” presents very little new information that a Pollard analyst would think contributes toward a more transparent and fuller account to the continuing saga of an American Jew serving his 28th year of an unjustified prison sentence in the land that we call the “the home of the free.”

Even the reference to Mr. Pollard’s lawyer saying that he would not talk to the Standard speaks volumes about why we may never know all that we wish to know. It’s because people who are close to the story are afraid to contribute to the greater body of knowledge.

The lawyer joins a long list of influ-ential Jewish icons in both the United States and Israel who have failed to act, or to say the appropriate thing at the time of need.

With no deep inherent selfless con-victions of their own, absent any real depth of individual or collective con-sciousness of guilt or humility, American Jewry has betrayed Mr. Pollard and has traded his continued existence and physical deterioration in federal prison for what they would prefer to define as more urgent matters, such as can be generalized under the “greater” banner of “the security of Israel.”

The failure to see that Mr. Pollard represents the litmus test of Israeli-American relations is the reason why we do not act out of conviction, doctrine, and ethics.

At this point, it will not matter what “new” CIA document may reveal, or whether any declassified information may shed new light on already analyzed and considered evidence. And it cer-

tainly wasn’t a Wolf Blitzer interview in prison many years ago that is material, or substantive to Pollard’s continued incarceration.

A full assessment of the extent of what damages Pollard caused the United States will never be made be-cause the estimate always has been exaggerated. The sole card to Pollard’s continued incarceration always will be that if the information ever is revealed it will inevitably indict more fully, or ex-acerbate already existing claims by the prosecution.

Certain people who want Pollard to die in jail never will reveal that card, de-spite the likelihood that there is no card!

Claims that American Jews act out of double loyalty will be leveled by those who are especially cynically and com-pulsively sure of their own loyalties, not necessarily in line with a greater popular America, but of more of fringe and extremist agendas and interests. But American Jews have themselves to blame for Mr. Pollard’s continuous in-carceration. Growing up, maturing, and building the greatest Torah centers in the history of the Jewish world, we are confronted with the greatest tests of all: ahavat Yisroel and pidyon she’vu’yim.

American Jews are in a more secure world because of the information that Mr. Pollard provided that enhanced the security of the State of Israel. This, as we know today, did not come at the expense of American security. Despite the at-tempts to assassinate his character and depict him as a self-serving and egocen-tric spy, nevertheless it must be under-stood that upon seeing vital information being willfully withheld, Mr. Pollard felt it was his duty to act.

If there are those in the State Department or the intelligence agen-cies that are particularly adamant about an early commutation to Mr. Pollard’s release, then we should meet with them. Under no circumstance should any member of the Jewish community or the Christian pro-Israel camp meet with the president without being knowl-edgeable and vehement about an early commutation of Mr. Pollard’s sentence. Iran’s nuclear threat, the peace process, Hezbollah and Hamas should always be secondary, with Mr. Pollard’s plight be-ing number 1. Lighting Chanukah can-dles on the White house lawn and eating kosher meals in the White House actu-ally are lost opportunities to procure his release. Such decision and efforts will always work and we must act now.

There is more information at www.jonathanpollard.org, and a letter to him always will be appreciated.

David SubinEnglewood

Gentiles ‘guided’ to Christmas cheerI would like to comment on the December 28 FYI column called “China Syndrome.” The “finkorswim” website on hilchos Christmas that you referred to was hilarious. And the “Talmud for Christmas” by Rabbis Rick Brody and Rachel Kobrin raised a question: “At what time does one attend the cinema?” I’m sure their references to Talmudic sages would show that some say before the Chinese dinner, while others say after.

Years ago, we would go to the movies on Christmas and find the place nearly empty, except for other Jews. There is a Yiddish expression that what happens in the Christian community follows in the Jewish community. With movies, the opposite has happened. We went to the Garden State Plaza theater last week and found that the first two showings we preferred were sold out and the one we got into was full. The lobby had intermi-nable lines at every step, and I never saw the place more crowded. Apparently, the other Jewish Christmas tradition has caught on with the Gentiles. More power to us! We have also given them “White Christmas” and “The Christmas Song.” What more can we do for them?

Stephen TencerNew Milford

Guns and peopleRabbi Kiel should read the Supreme Court’s decision regarding guns and the Second Amendment (Letters, December 28). He seems ignorant of the reasons for the Second Amendment and its importance in the passage of the U.S. Constitution. He disregards the actions of governments around the world that confiscated arms from its citizens and the results therefrom. In Chicago, this year, with laws banning guns, there were 500 deaths involving guns. Those that revere the rationale for the rights noted in the Declaration of Independence are members of both political parties as well as the politically independent. Cars kill more people than guns so let’s ban or control what type of car one can buy. People kill people with any weapon available that will suit someone or some group in order to suffice inner rage. Jews should remember that assault weapons were instrumental in the founding of the State of Israel. Idealism is possible, but only after reality has afforded us the op-portunity to espouse that idealism.

Shel HaasFort Lee

Opinions expressed in the op-ed and letters columns are not necessarily those of The Jewish Standard. Include a day-time telephone number with your letters. The Jewish Standard reserves the right to edit letters. Write to Letters, The Jewish Standard, 1086 Teaneck Road, Teaneck, NJ 07666, or e-mail [email protected]. Hand-written letters are not acceptable.

Letters

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Cover story


The sober side of BirthrightJACS uses Israel trip as a way to reinforce recovery from dependencies

Joanne Palmer

Birthright Israel is meant to make people fall in love with

Israel.There is nothing hidden about that goal, and most

of the time it works. It offers its 18- to 26-year-old participants a free trip that engages all their senses, engages their emotions, and very often captures their hearts. It accomplishes its task in a whirlwind of sights, sounds, smells, tastes, colors, and experiences, often fueled with the short-term rush of adrenaline rather than the longer-term comfort of sleep.

Very often, it is also fueled by alcohol. Not officially — but the drinking age in Israel is 18, and strictures against visible drunkenness and loutishness do not stop more

restrained adult drinking.That’s fine for most Birthright participants. It’s not fine

for travelers who have had substance abuse problems.That’s why JACS runs a sober Birthright Israel trip

twice a year. The most recent trip left on December 24 and is scheduled to return today.

JACS is the acronym for a group called Jewish Alcoholics, Chemically dependent persons, and Significant others. (It is an acronym if you squint at it selectively, at any rate.) It is a project of the Jewish Board of Children and Family Services of New York, funded in part by UJA Federation of New York, but its reach is region-wide, and it offers weekly meetings in Teaneck.

Sharon Darack, JACS’s program director, lives in Teaneck. She has helped facilitate the group’s trips since its first one, in March 2010. “We felt that Birthright

tours were not sober and they did not feel safe, so we applied to Israel Free Spirit to do a 12-step tour,” she said. (Birthright Israel is an extraordinarily complicated program. There are many so-called trip providers — travel agencies, basically — that take care of trip logistics. Once they have been accepted by Birthright and by the trip providers, many different organizations, each with a slightly different slant, vie for and attract would-be participants, who also have to be accepted by Birthright. Many more people apply than can be accepted.)

The first trip was an experiment. Darack had no idea how many applicants she could round up for the trip, so JACS decided to open it to anyone who was interested in a sober tour and otherwise qualified for Birthright — not only people in 12-step programs or otherwise in recovery, but also people with illnesses that did not allow

Participants in a JACS sober Birthright Israel trip listen to their tour guide in an open-air setting.

them to drink, as well as others who simply did not want to have to deal with drink or drunks. “Between 60 and 70 people applied,” she said.

Since then, the trip, now only for people recovering from addictions, has run every six months.

It tends to affect participants deeply, according to Darack, who led one such trip last year.

“A lot of them are sober for the first time in years, even though they’re babies, really,” she said. “They’re in their mid-20s, on average, and they’ve been active drug addicts or alcoholics since they were 12 or 13, some of them. And they’re clear now.” In fact, she said, one 26-year-old participant had been sober for nine years.

“It’s beautiful to see,” she continued. “It was very emotional for me, to see them put on tefillin — to see someone who’s never done it before learn to put on tefillin — someone who a year ago was a heroin addict, living on the street. It’s life-changing.

“Most of them have come back from using opiates or alcoholism, and through that homelessness. Their lives had become unmanageable. They fell apart. And then they go to treatment.” And then they go on Birthright.

The result is raw emotion.“It’s mind-blowing. It’s breathtaking,” Darack said.“It is my understanding that Israel Free Spirit loves our

tour, because it is so meaningful. Every person on it is in a place of profound gratitude. They say things like ‘I never thought I’d come to Israel. I never thought I’d be alive and be able to come to Israel.’ They have overwhelming

feelings of ‘I’m in Israel. I’m a Jew. I’m alive. It’s a miracle.’“Some of them cry. They’re excited. They’re

happy; they’re sad, but happy. It’s a 10-day emotional rollercoaster.”

This is not entirely unlike what many Birthright participants feel, but it is more intense because so many travelers on the sober trip are so vulnerable and have not yet rebuilt their defenses. They also are forced to face questions of identity more baldly than their peers. “They have to figure out, ‘Where do I belong in this world?’” Darack said. “‘Where am I as a Jewish person?’”

Not only do the participants struggle with these existential questions internally, in the middle of the night, riding on a bus, or walking through Jerusalem in blinding light, they also ask them out loud in the 12-step meetings that are part of their itinerary. “They get to share,” Darack said. Because the group goes to two 12-step meetings for English-speaking Israelis and also holds its own during the trip, participants are able to talk about their emotions instead of burying them with drink, drugs, or even the whir of constant motion.

Daniel, who is 22 years old and lives in Brooklyn, was on the sober Birthright trip last spring. (JACS participants, like many other recovering alcoholics and addicts in 12-step programs, ask that their last names not be made public. If they can be identified, the thinking

Church basement or shul, the goal is recovery

The people JACS help, like its staff and volun-teers, represent the full range of Jewish life in North America.

And that is a good thing, according to Susan, a recovered addict, who says it helps to have a specifically Jewish way to recover from it.

“I went to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings — this was about 32 years ago — and another woman and I were the only two Jews in the group. The group was incredibly loving and supportive, but it was in a church basement,” she said.

“They’d end the meeting with the Lord’s Prayer, and people would cross themselves.

“It was fine, because that place gave me my life back. But then somebody came to me and said, ‘I have a place for you to go.’ He was ahead of me — he had about six months of sobriety — and it was a JACS retreat.”

JACS was brand new then; its retreats were small and groundbreaking.

“It took me about six months to get the retreat, and then I was hooked,” Susan said. “There was something about it, an honesty — I felt that I had walked into home. These people spoke my language. I learned a lot; I began to study in chavurah with people in JACS.

“One of the rabbis was Orthodox” — Susan is deeply Jewish, but she was not and still is not Orthodox; in fact, she does not practice religion at all fervently — “and very different from me. It enhanced my Jewish understanding of where I really come from.”

Program director Sharon Darack is clear, though, that although it is wonderful for Jews to have the opportunity to find meetings in shul basements rather than in churches, “still, most meetings still are in churches, and we encourage people to go to them. We support it. There are many rabbis who say that it’s okay. It’s pikuach nefesh — saving a life. Your life. It will help you. There is nothing wrong with it. You are there to save your life.”

“JACS is not a religious program,” Lisa Auerbach, the learning specialist, said. “It offers education and support for Jews in recovery, no matter what denomination they come from or pathway they are on. We deal with the ultra-Orthodox community, and with people who identify themselves as Jewish but who do not necessarily choose to go down a religiously Jewish path.

“We have wonderful rabbis, who have worked with us for 30 years. We have meetings in synagogues, because there are people who have difficulty going to churches. We jokingly say that if we ever made a movie about JACS, we’d call it ‘From Shtreimels to Miniskirts,’ because if you come to a retreat, you see someone who you can see from his dress is ultra-Orthodox talking to someone in jeans with nose-rings and piercings.

“It’s one of the few places in the Jewish community that reaches everyone, because here all Jews are equal. They’re all here for one purpose — and that purpose is recovery.”

-- Joanne Palmer

The JACS so ber Birthright trip includes some davening.

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The next sober Birthright Israel tour is set for June 10-20.

JACS meets the first Thursday of each month at 7:30 p.m. at the offices of the Jewish Family Service of Bergen and North Hudson at 1485 Teaneck Road in Teaneck. The meeting is open to all Jews who want to get help with their own addiction, or the addiction of someone they love. The meetings focus on issues of alcoholism, chemical dependency, and co-depen-dency as they relate to Judaism and spirituality. The meetings are non-denominational and anonymity is respected.

For information call 201-837-9090 and ask for Ira, or email him at [email protected].

“They have overwhelming feelings of ‘I’m in Israel. I’m a Jew. I’m alive. It’s a miracle.…’ It’s a 10-day emotional rollercoaster.”

— Sharon Darack


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goes, and if they relapse, the failure can reflect on the entire program.)

Daniel is articulate and seems to be both smart and self-aware. His history is sobering.

“I’d been using drugs since high school, and then it continued into college,” he said. “I never made any attempts to stop, even though I knew it was a problem.

“At first, I was at McDaniels, a small school in Maryland that you’ve probably never heard of. There was nothing to do there, so I did a lot of drugs. Then I transferred to Temple in Philadelphia, which you probably have heard of. There were a lot more drugs there, so I did a lot of drugs.”

Eventually, he was unable to continue with school, took some time off — “I was really struggling, really depressed” — and ended up in a seven-month treatment program. Six months into the program, he went on Birthright.

“Being in Israel was really cool,” Daniel said. “I’d been once, when I was 7, but I didn’t remember anything, so it was a really new experience for me. I was just blown away by how beautiful the country was. Everything about it was amazing.

“I think that if I hadn’t been sober, it wouldn’t have been such a great experience.

“I didn’t feel much connection to Judaism prior to the trip,” he continued. “I’m not very religious. But the trip made me feel connected, and not in an artificial way. I felt a strong connection to my historical roots, and to the land itself.

“When I got home, I felt the emotional impact of it. When I was there, I was kind of in the moment. Seeing the desert, these amazing different structural landscapes, just blew me away.”

Daniel has strong political views that are to the left of

those he felt expressed on Birthright, but he learned from that. “When I was there, my views definitely changed,” he said. He felt some tension. “I definitely see it differently now. We saw places like Sderot,” a town that faces nearly constant bombardment from Gaza, and whose residents live in a debilitating state of constant alert, “and you see that it’s such a complicated issue.

“Birthright presents everything in a one-sided way, which is understandable, so I was able to use that, and add it to my preconceived notions, and get a well-

rounded perception.”Lisa Auerbach, a learning specialist who lives in

Brooklyn, is president of the council of volunteers that oversees JACS.

She was a leader on the first sober Birthright trip.“It was pretty intense,” she said. Some of the

participants had been to Israel already — Birthright’s rules are that the trip cannot have been with a peer group, but people who have visited with family are eligible — “but the majority of the kids who had been

The sober Birthright Israel experience appeals to 18-to 26-year-olds in recovery.

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there had not experienced it fully. This gave them an opportunity to come back.

“There was an incredible moment when we touched down in Israel, and one of the participants had a difficult time getting off the plane. She got very emotional, because Israel was the place where it all fell apart for her.

“She was afraid of what it would be like to come back sober.”

This story has a happy ending. “It was really wonderful for her,” Auerbach said. “That was what I witnessed. I watched these kids really experience something, really be present in way they weren’t before, in a place that meant a lot to them.”

It meant so much to the participants, in fact, that a few of them have made aliyah and now live in Israel.

Prospective travelers on JACS/Birthright Israel trip have to meet both Birthright’s and JACS’ specifications.

“We have very specific requirements for applicants,” Darack said. “They must have been sober for a minimum of three months from drug or alcohol addictions, or other 12-step programs, such as eating disorders or gambling. Most of the time when it comes to drug and alcohol addiction, there is a crossover to other addictions — eating, gambling, sex, the Internet.”

The application process is intense. It begins with a phone screening. “We start to learn who they are,” Darack said. “They have to tell us about their recovery,

their mental health, who sponsors them, any criminal reports, any probation requirements.” Because some of the applicants are still in what she calls “early recovery,” they tend not to be particularly well organized; when it might take someone else “five hours to get everything together, if they’re in early recovery it could take five months,” she said.

“And about half of our population is on medication.

Part of the process is getting a note from their doctor. It freaks them out, needing a doctor’s note, but the reality is that it’s just a precaution.

“Actually, almost all of the applicants make it through the process,” she added. “They might be wait-listed, if they’re not sober enough.”

JACS also screens the Israeli soldiers who join the trip for a few days. They are not recovering addicts, but they must be comfortable around people who are. “They have to understand the nature of what we do, and we have to make sure that they can stay sober for five days,” Darack said.

Although the Birthright trip may be JACS’s most visible project, it is far from its only one. JACS is not only for young people, either. It offers educational programs

and meetings, works in schools, runs a speakers bureau, and holds a retreat where recovering addicts and congregational rabbis who will find themselves counseling addicts and their families can learn from each other.

Everyone active in JACS at one time or other has to face the deeply held belief — which, in fact, is a myth — that Jews do not drink or do drugs; that the problem is endemic in other communities, but has spared this one.

That is not true.“It’s typical Jewish denial,” Darack said. Moreover, that

particular denial is not unique to Jews. “It happens in many cultures,” she said. “Italian, Spanish — it’s a way of saying that doesn’t happen to me.

“Jews don’t want to air our laundry in public,” she continued. “We want to keep it in house, to sweep it under the rug, and then say that it doesn’t happen here. We have to explain that it’s okay to speak out and get help. People are so ashamed.

“In more religious settings, the worry is, ‘What will other families say? How will our other kids get a shiduch?’ In more secular families, the worry is, ‘How will my kid get into college? Will this be all over Facebook?’”

Auerbach agrees that JACS can save lives.“We had a young man who came to us; he was about

16,” she remembered. “He had heard us speak at his school.

“He told us that he had planned to go home that day and kill himself, but he heard one of our members speak and went up to him instead.

“And that young man? We went to his wedding. We walked around and kept saying, ‘Our baby’s getting married! Our baby’s getting married!’

“We have many success stories. I feel incredibly blessed by them. These kids have been a gift.”

Food Addicts Anonymous meetings are held Wednesdays at 7:15 p.m., also at the JFS offices in Teaneck. Food Addicts Anonymous is a fellowship open to all who wish to recover from food addiction and is based on the AA 12 Steps. For information, email Yael at (347) 210-8124.

“Jews don’t want to air our laundry in public. We want to keep it in house, to sweep it under the rug, and then say that it doesn’t happen here.…”

— Sharon Darack

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Life after Newtownsome Jewish gun owners are ready to consider measures for controls

Chavie Lieber

Until recently, Eric Schaefer owned a .233 caliber semiauto-matic Bushmaster rifle.

The day he learned that a rifle like his was used to kill 26 people in Newtown, Conn., he sold his weapon to a local law enforcement agency near his home in Scottsdale, Ariz.

Schaefer, a 40-year-old commercial real estate agent, says he has been hit by an unshakable feeling of shame. He no longer wants his two children exposed to the many weapons he owns for sport-ing purposes — guns he keeps locked up and away from the house.

“There’s a sense of embarrassment now to being a gun owner. I don’t feel proud of it,” Schaefer said. “I have my guns as a personal enthusiast, but I can’t say I support all the language and laws associated with guns. It’s far too easy to come across them in this country.”

The mass shooting at a suburban elementary school that left 20 children and six adults dead two weeks ago has reignited the country’s longstanding de-bate over gun control, pitting supporters of tighter restrictions against those who fear any infringement on their Second Amendment rights.

But while the gun-rights lobby has made clear that it opposes any measures to limit the availability of deadly weap-ons any further, some Jewish gun owners acknowledge that they are uncomfort-able with the current regulations on firearms sales.

Schaefer says authorities should constantly check the mental state of gun owners and he would like to see the wait

time for gun purchases extended. (That is a measure that could buy time for potential shooters acting on instinct to reconsider their actions.)

“I feel like it ought to be excruciat-ingly difficult to own a gun, and those who really want one should be able to tough through a more rigorous, difficult process to get one,” Schaefer said. “Law-abiding citizens that want guns for safe reasons like myself should want tougher gun restrictions, so the country can use weapons properly.”

Rabbi Jonathan Siger, a law enforce-ment chaplain and former NRA shoot-

ing instructor from Spring, Texas, says bearing weapons is a God-given right — especially for Jews. But Siger says he would support tighter controls, such as requiring someone applying for a carry permit to have two character witnesses, and closing the so-called gun show loop-hole that enables buyers to circumvent a federal background check.

“I don’t understand how some people get their hands on guns,” Siger said. “It

Gun control supporters protesting outside the National Rifle Association office on Capitol Hill in Washington on December 17. Josh Lopez/Creative Commons

“I feel like it ought to be excruciatingly difficult to own a gun, and those who really want one should be able to tough through a more rigorous, difficult process to get one.”

— Eric Schaefer


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seems to me the glaring problem is there is not enough control over who is selling what to whom.”

Many people have suggested such controls in response to Newtown. The National Rifle Association, the coun-try’s premier gun-rights lobby, opposes them. Wayne LaPierre, the group’s ex-ecutive vice president, responded to the Newtown shooting by proposing a number of new measures, such as plac-ing armed guards in each of the nation’s public schools and focusing on mental health issues.

The NRA’s response was widely criti-cized, even by such vocal conservatives as columnist Ann Coulter and media mogul Rupert Murdoch. But some Jewish gun owners said LaPierre didn’t go far enough.

“The NRA is way too soft on the is-sue,” said Charles Heller, the executive director of the Jews for the Preservation of Firearms Ownership, an advocacy group. “We should be increasing the lay-ers of security in our school by training teachers and administrators who want to work also as security.”

Heller, whose organization has linked gun control to genocide, recommended offering tax breaks to veteran special-forces soldiers and retired policemen in exchange for protecting schools. A society with fewer guns would be more violent, he said.

“Don’t punish the innocent for the acts of the guilty,” Heller said. “That’s not very Jewish.”

After the Newtown shooting, a broad range of Jewish groups — the Religious Action Center, the Jewish Council for Public Affairs, B’nai Brith International, and the National Council of Jewish Women, among others — threw their support behind measures to limit the availability of guns.

To many Jewish gun enthusiasts, how-ever, history provides ample justification for arming civilians and refusing to rely solely on police protection. They rou-tinely invoke the powerlessness of Jews during the Holocaust and the current security threats to Jewish institutions, and they are dumbfounded by Jews who favor gun control.

“It is one of the most frustrating feel-ings to watch those who have been and continue to be the most persecuted people on the planet deny themselves the inherent right of self-defense,” said Zev Nadler, an NRA-certified instructor in Arizona. “A firearm is a great equalizer in that those who wish to do a Jew harm know that they may be armed. And sud-denly we are not the easy prey we used to be.”

But the Newtown shooting, with its grisly details and 20 dead children, has left some gun owners ready for change. President Barack Obama has conveyed

his support for reinstating the federal as-sault weapons ban that expired in 2004 and restricting high-capacity gun maga-zines. The NRA’s outright refusal even to discuss such an approach isn’t viable, these gun owners say.

“To me, this is a clear example that something needs to be done,” said a criminal defense attorney from

Michigan, a gun owner who did not want his name made public. An assault ban on certain weapons wouldn’t help because a gun is a gun, and they are dangerous. But the NRA needs to be open to sitting down and talking because now is when we need an open debate about realistic measures of change.”

JTA Wire Service

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Reform movement and AIPAC stake out opposing positions on penalizing PalestiniansRon Kampeas

WASHINGTON – Two major Jewish groups are at odds over the prospect of penalties for the Palestinians as a result of their enhanced U.N. status.

In recent weeks, the American Israel Public Affairs Committee has backed two congressional bids to at least shut down the Palestine Liberation Organization office in Washington. That is in response to the United Nations General Assembly’s overwhelming vote on November 29, which granted Palestinians non-member observer state status.

Conversely, the Reform movement has urged President Barack Obama emphatically not to retaliate against the Palestinians, JTA has learned. The Reform movement also has resolved to oppose the shuttering of the PLO office.

The lines dividing the two organizations are not necessarily set in stone. The Reform movement has suggested that it might back penalties should the Palestinians use their new status to charge Israel in in-ternational courts. An AIPAC official suggested to JTA that the organization would wait and see whether the Palestinians go to international courts before it decides its next legislative moves.

Still, the markedly different tone in AIPAC’s call to its activists to back the proposed congressional penalties and the Reform movement’s plea to the president to ignore such calls could portend a split within the pro-Israel community’s center.

An AIPAC official, speaking on condition of anonym-ity, would not specify its differences with the Reform movement’s view. But the official noted that the con-gressional letter to Obama that AIPAC backed this month urges a resumption of peace talks in addition to calling for the closing of the PLO office and a suspen-sion of funding to some U.N. affiliates.

“Everyone in the pro-Israel community should be pleased that a solid bipartisan majority signed a pro-peace talks letter in support of direct talks and opposed to attempts to delegitimize Israel,” the official said.

Israel has made clear that the Palestinians’ U.N. moves should have consequences. It has announced a flurry of new building projects in eastern Jerusalem and the west bank, and diverted millions of dollars in taxes earmarked for the Palestinian Authority to Israeli utility providers that have been dunning the Palestinians for payment.

Recently, reporters for Jewish media asked Michael Oren, the Israeli ambassador to Washington, his view on congressional proposals to penalize the Palestinians. His answer suggested pique not just at the Palestinians’ enhanced U.N. status but also at the speech by P.A. President Mahmoud Abbas that preceded the vote.

“We think that the Palestinians when they violate agreements, when they declare that Israel is a war crim-inal or when they describe Israel as a war criminal for defending itself against thousands of terrorist rockets

without ever condemning those rockets, we think they should be held to task for that,” Oren said. “We do not think they should be given a free pass.”

But the leaders of the largest American Jewish de-nomination have called for restraint from the U.S. in responding to the Palestinians’ U.N. bid.

In a December 14 letter to Obama, the president of the Union for Reform Judaism, Rabbi Rick Jacobs, and the CEO of the Reform movement’s Central Conference of American Rabbis, Rabbi Steve Fox, noted a December 3 resolution that had been approved by the boards of a number of Reform organizations.

The statement, the rabbis note in the letter, con-demns the Palestinians for moving ahead with the ad-vanced status but also “urges Congress to eschew any action that would serve as an impediment” to resuming Israeli-Palestinian peace talks.

The letter from the Reform leaders to Obama at-taches the December 3 resolution, which opposes fund-ing cuts to the Palestinians, to the United Nations and “any reduction in the currently recognized Palestinian diplomatic presence.”

The resolution also “opposes” Israel’s retaliatory plans to build Jewish homes in eastern Jerusalem and the west bank, and supports “appropriate measures if the Palestinians use their new status at the U.N. to ini-tiate formal action against Israel via the International Criminal Court or other agency.”

The Reform movement made the December 3 reso-lution public, but the December 14 letter to Obama was released to a JTA reporter by mistake. A spokesman for the group said the failure to publicize the letter to the president was an oversight, noting that it was sent on the day when the nation was preoccupied with the mas-sacre of first graders the Newtown, Conn.

Some dovish Jewish groups, including J Street and Americans for Peace Now, also have made clear their opposition to penalties for the Palestinians.

In a fundraising letter, J Street’s president, Jeremy Ben-Ami, counted the 239 signatures on the AIPAC-backed congressional letter sent December 21 as a vic-tory for his movement, noting particularly that only 67 Democrats signed.

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Reform leader Rabbi Rick Jacobs, shown speaking at the Jewish Federations of North America General Assembly in Jerusalem in November 2012, co-signed a letter to President Obama advising against any action that would damage efforts to renew peace talks with the Palestinians. RobeRt A. Cumins / JFnA)

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“We’re seeing the impact in Congress where two-thirds of the Democratic Caucus refused to sign AIPAC’s latest letter calling for closing the PLO’s diplomatic mission in Washington,” Ben-Ami said in the letter. “Such letters used to be signed by four out of every five Members of Congress. Not any more.”

A slate of recent AIPAC-backed letters indeed have scored signatures in the mid-300s, but letters scoring in the mid-200s are not exceptional, and the new let-ter still was signed by a majority of the U.S. House of Representatives.

The AIPAC official acknowledged that the organiza-tion had hoped for more signatures but added that the letter was circulated toward the end of a congressional session — and the session was focused on finding a compromise on spending and taxes.

“There’s a confidence that Ileana Ros-Lehtinen and Howard Berman would have gotten more signatures had there been time,” the official said, referring re-spectively to the House Foreign Affairs Committee’s Republican chairwoman and the Democratic ranking member who together initiated the letter. Both are leav-ing their top committee posts, Berman after having lost an intra-party re-election battle in his home district and Ros-Lehtinen as a result of Republican caucus rules lim-iting the tenures of committee heads.

On its website, AIPAC touted the congressional letter as a key element of its legislative agenda.

“The Palestinians must face consequences,” AIPAC said. “The United States should continue to press the Palestinians to refrain from such harmful actions and outline repercussions if they move ahead, such as clos-ing the PLO office in Washington.”

The letter proposes the immediate closing of the of-fice “to send the message that such actions are not cost-free and that, at a minimum, they result in setbacks to U.S.-Palestinian relations.”

AIPAC also is backing a Senate amendment that would shut the PLO office, and if the Palestinians pro-ceed to the International Criminal Court, would cut P.A. funding.

AIPAC’s professional leadership circulated a letter to senators urging its passage.

“The amendment does two things,” said the letter, signed by Howard Kohr, AIPAC’s executive director, and Marvin Feuer and Brad Gordon, its joint directors of policy and government affairs. “1) It would cut off aid to the Palestinian Authority should it successfully pursue anti-Israel efforts at the International Criminal Court and 2) it would close down all PLO offices in the United States unless the Palestinians re-enter meaningful peace negotiations with Israel.”

AIPAC, however, has not alerted its activists to the Senate amendment.

The amendment, proposed by Sens. Charles Schumer (D-N.Y.), Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.), and John Barrasso (R-Wyo.) on the same day as the U.N. vote, never made it to the Senate floor; it’s not clear why.

Also not clear is why the House letter did not include a recommendation to Obama to cut funding to the Palestinians, although it has been the centerpiece of warnings over the last year to Palestinians should they press ahead with efforts to upgrade their status at the United Nations. The offices of Ros-Lehtinen, a Florida Republican, and Berman, a California Democrat, did not return requests for comment.

In the past, Israel has quietly opposed cutting off funding to the Palestinians, and even after the U.N. vote, with the exception of the diversion of some $180 million in taxes earmarked for the Palestinian Authority to Israel’s electricity provider, it has refrained from im-posing its own penalties.

Despite diplomatic tensions, Israeli and Palestinian Authority security forces continue to cooperate to keep the west bank quiet, and, in the past, Israeli security officials have been vocal in their opposition to funding cuts for the Palestinians.

JTA Wire Service

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Ron Dermer, the senior adviser to Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, speaking at a convention of Jewish bloggers in Jerusalem in 2009. MiriaM alster/Flash90/Jta

The next Israeli ambassador?netanyahu aide ron dermer brings american sensibilities to israeli politics

Ben SaleS

TEL AVIV – Like many Israeli politicians, Ron Dermer is an unapologetic defender of Israel’s actions, even if it might mean being undiplomatic.

But like a seasoned diplomat, Dermer — senior adviser to Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu — knows his way through Washington’s backchannels and has cultivated relationships with senior U.S. policymakers.

Most important, say those who know him, Dermer has Netanyahu’s ear.

“Netanyahu likes him, respects him, and listens to him,” said Uzi Arad, Netanyahu’s national security adviser until 2011. “I often asked for his advice. In many ways he was a guy to listen to. When it came to knowledge and being cultured and erudite and intellectually inclined, that’s him.”

Dermer’s name was floated last week as a possible successor to Michael Oren as Israel’s ambassador to Washington. Though the report about Dermer, published last Friday in Israel’s Makor Rishon newspaper, was denied almost immediately, it could have been a trial balloon. Oren is set to return to Israel in the spring, providing an opening at the most important overseas post in the Israeli diplomatic corps.

Netanyahu’s office declined to comment on the report; the Israeli embassy in Washington called it baseless.

If Dermer were to go to Washington, he would be the second U.S.-born Israeli ambassador to the United States in a row.

Born and raised in Florida and educated at the University of Pennsylvania, Dermer, 41, started his career working with Republican strategist Frank Luntz on the Republicans’ 1994 midterm election victory. From there he went on to earn a master’s degree at Oxford, intermittently traveling to Israel to work on the Knesset campaign of Natan Sharansky, the former Soviet refusenik who then headed the Russian-immigrant Yisrael B’Aliyah party.

Dermer made aliyah to Israel in 1997 and stayed

with Sharansky for his 1999 Knesset drive. He continued consulting after the election, and in 2001 he began to write a weekly Jerusalem Post column, the Numbers Game, which became an outlet for his hard-line views. In 2003, for example, Dermer wrote that in agreeing to the U.S.-sponsored “road map” plan for Israeli-Palestinian peace, Israel had given up its sovereignty.

“It is one thing for Israel to take into consideration what America says,” he wrote. “In fact, Israel’s national interest demands that it do so. But it is quite another to cede to a third party, no matter how friendly, the right to determine Israel’s future.”

In 2005, with Netanyahu serving as Israel’s finance minister, Dermer returned to Washington to become the economic charge d’affaires at Israel’s embassy. He had to surrender his U.S. citizenship to take the job, and in a column in the New York Sun wrote that he “left America because I wanted to help another nation I love defend the freedoms that Americans have long taken for granted.”

That conviction came through in “The Case for Democracy,” a book Dermer co-wrote with Sharansky in 2004 on the importance of democracy for newly independent nations. The book reportedly was a major influence on President George W. Bush’s worldview.

Dermer returned to Israel in 2008 to work on Netanyahu’s successful campaign for prime minister and has stayed with Netanyahu. Colleagues say he brings both an American sensibility and an acute understanding of Washington politics to the job.

“He understands how Americans view Israelis and how Israelis view Americans,” said Mitchell Barak, an Israeli pollster who met Dermer when he was an adviser to former Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon. “He knows how to work [in Washington] and has personal relations.”

In his role as a Netanyahu adviser, Dermer has defended his boss pugnaciously in public. He also is the prime minister’s speechwriter and acts a liaison between Netanyahu’s office and the White House.


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Ron Dermer, the senior adviser to Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, speaking at a convention of Jewish bloggers in Jerusalem in 2009. MiriaM alster/Flash90/Jta

“He’s American born — he brings with him a professional understanding of America and he’s an admirable exponent of America,” Arad said. “He has been working with the key Americans with this administration.”

Dermer never has been shy about promoting his political viewpoint. In a 2009 interview he gave to the Israeli daily Yediot Achronot, Dermer criticized as “childish” the political “focus given to the matter of two states for two peoples instead of dealing with core issues.”

In a 2011 open letter to the New York Times, Dermer slammed the newspaper and its op-ed page.

Times columnists “consistently distort the positions of our government and ignore the steps it has taken to advance peace,” Dermer wrote in the letter, which was published in the Jerusalem Post. “It would seem as if the surest way to get an op-ed published in the New York Times these days, no matter how obscure the writer or the viewpoint, is to attack Israel.”

“He calls it like he sees it,” Barak said. “It’s widely known that he’s heavily identified with the Republican Party and conservative politics.”

The right-wing orientation could hinder Dermer if he is tapped for the ambassador job, according to Bar-Ilan University professor Eytan Gilboa. Gilboa says U.S.-Israel ties have deteriorated during Netanyahu’s term, citing as an

example what some saw as Netanyahu’s tacit support of Republican candidate Mitt Romney during the presidential campaign.

“People say that Netanyahu understands American politics, but judging from [his staff’s] behavior, they don’t understand American politics,” Gilboa said. “When you have a president like [Barack] Obama with an opposite worldview, you cooperate as much as possible, but it seems like Netanyahu is fighting.”

Gilboa said Dermer’s philosophy in “The Case for Democracy” was “good for Bush, but it doesn’t work with Obama.”

But Aaron David Miller, who served as an adviser on the Middle East to Republican and Democratic secretaries of state, said that if he becomes ambassador, Dermer’s personal views wouldn’t have much effect on the U.S.-Israel relationship. Miller, now a vice president at the Woodrow Wilson Center for International Scholars in Washington, called Dermer a “tough, pragmatic hawk.”

“I don’t attach much importance to mid- or senior-level officials in terms of altering the nature of the relationship between leaders,” he said. “They can facilitate improvements or make matters worse through their own missteps, but leaders have an ultimate responsibility for how the relationship evolves.”

JTA Wire Service

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The company makes five candies — UNREAL 41: Candy Coated Chocolates; UNREAL 54: Candy Coated Chocolates with Peanuts; UNREAL 5: Chocolate Caramel Nougat Bar; UNREAL 8: Chocolate Caramel Peanut Nougat Bar; and UNREAL 77: Peanut Butter Cups.

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Sh’mot: Forgetting and remembering

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As we begin a secular New Year, I’ve been wondering what kind of world we will make for our-

selves in 2013. There are serious chal-lenges we face as a nation, and at least two ways to address them. The parasha gives us two models to choose from.

First, we have the model of Pharoah. “A new king arose in Egypt who knew not Joseph.” (Exodus 1:8) What could this possibly mean? Did such a long time pass between Pharaohs that Joseph’s he-roic acts were legitimately forgotten? Or is something else at play here?

Rashi gives us a sample of the many rabbinic comments on this issue. Perhaps a great deal of time passes be-tween the Pharaoh of Joseph’s time and this “new” king. Or perhaps, asah atzmo ke’ilu lo yada. He made himself forget. He willfully acted as if he never knew what had come before.

The other model of world-making we learn from two women, the mid-wives named Shifrah and Puah. When this “new” Pharaoh decrees that all the first-born sons of the Israelites are to be killed, Shifrah and Puah resist, resisting the evil decree.

The portion begins with these words, which give the book its Hebrew title of Sh’mot, or “Names”: “These are the names of the children of Israel who came down to Egypt… Reuven, Shimon, Levi, and Yehuda…” Exodus 1:1.

“These are the names.…” These words have haunted me in recent

weeks. We have seen lists of the names of those killed in Newtown, Conn., scant days ago. These are the names: Charlotte, Daniel, Grace, Noah, Rachel, Olivia, Josephine, Anna, Dylan, Dawn, Madeline, Catherine, Chase, Jesse, James, Emile, Ann, Jack, Caroline, Jessie, Avielle, Lauren, Mary, Victoria, Benjamin, and Allison. These are only the most recent 26 worlds to be de-stroyed by the plague of gun violence. This was only one of the most visible massacres — the ones that make the news for days on end, the ones that get our attention and bring us to our knees. Among the many year-end lists so popu-lar this time of year, we could add a grue-some one: the list of the 30,000 people whose lives ended this way in America in 2012, most of whom didn’t make the 24 hour news cycle. When my father was murdered by a man with a gun almost 14 years ago, news of his death barely made one column inch of news in the Chicago Tribune.

We have a choice in America this year. How will we respond? Will we be like Pharaoh? When time passes, and the news cycle turns, it will be easy to forget this nightmare. And who really wants to remember it, anyway? It would be much easier on our psyches to will ourselves to block out this tragedy.

Or will we be like Shifrah and Puah, speaking truth to power, demanding justice, standing up for what is right, re-solving to remember these names, and never forget?

Will we allow the NRA and those it supports to continue to rationalize the ownership of weapons of mass destruc-tion in the name of the Constitution?

If the names Aurora and Milwaukee and Tucson and Virginia Tech didn’t con-vince us that it’s time to do something about the ease of access to murderous technology, perhaps the name Sandy Hook will.

On this Shabbat Sh’mot, let Shifrah and Puah be our model, not Pharaoh. Let’s hold our officials accountable to make the world safer, rather than be complicit in a culture that throws its hands in the air, resigned that we can do nothing to curb violence. Let it not be said of us: asah atzmo ke’ilu lo yada.

“Charlotte, Daniel, Grace, Noah, Rachel, Olivia, Josephine, Anna, Dylan, Dawn, Madeline, Catherine, Chase, Jesse, James, Emile, Ann, Jack, Caroline, Jessie, Avielle, Lauren, Mary, Victoria, Benjamin, and Allison.”

—Victims of Newtown

Arts & culture

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RobeRt Gluck

Oscar Hammerstein II was raised by Scottish Presbyterians, and the only time he ever entered a synagogue was to deliver eulogies at Temple

Emanu-El on Fifth Avenue in Manhattan.But according to his grandson, Oscar Andrew (Andy)

Hammerstein III, his Jewish heritage influenced Oscar II’s work — work for which he won eight Tony awards and two Academy awards as a lyricist on musicals including “The Sound of Music,” “South Pacific,” and “Oklahoma.” This influence can be traced back to Oscar II’s grandfather, German-Jewish theater impresario Oscar Hammerstein I.

“German Jews, especially those who had been given the ironic opportunity to assimilate during the 1860s and ’70s — that crowd metamorphosed their Judaism to a great love of musical theater, opera in particular,” Andy Hammerstein said. “There was something about it that appealed to the heart. What is musical theater but song and story? What is Judaism but rabbi and cantor? You have a twin-pronged religion teaching children. When they leave the religion they still bring with them that twin-pronged desire for song and story. Judaism is remarkable because it appeals to the singer and the storyteller. Oscar is in some way carrying out a very Jewish tradition of sung story.”

Oscar II’s work remains influential more than five decades after his death in 1960. Five-time Grammy winner Carrie Underwood will star in the coveted role of Maria von Trapp in NBC’s live broadcast of “The Sound of Music” in late 2013. NBC is partnering with the acclaimed “Smash” producing team of Craig Zadan and Neil Meron for “The Sound of Music.”

Bert Fink, senior vice president at the Rodgers & Hammerstein agency, which was founded by the legendary theater team of Oscar II and Richard Rodgers, said, “As much as I would like to claim Oscar Hammerstein II as a landsman, he was not Jewish, neither by Talmudic law, nor in how he was raised.

“His mother, Alice, was of Scottish descent, and her religion has been described as Presbyterian or Episcopalian. Oscar Hammerstein II was raised in the Episcopalian faith, and he raised his children vaguely in that faith.”

According to Ellen Schiff, adviser to the Jewish Theatre of Austria and a consultant to the Foundation of Jewish Culture in New York, Oscar II “was more focused in his endeavors” than his Jewish grandfather had been.

“He was smitten with the love of musical theater and spent his whole life in it,” Schiff said. “As a student at Columbia he wrote university productions based on adaptations, a practice he continued, with one exception, throughout his career. Recognizing that audiences were less engaged with a show’s typically unlikely story than they were with its songs and comedy, he set out to explore interweaving these elements.”

In 1949, Oscar II took a lot of flak for inserting the song “You’ve Got to be Carefully Taught” into “South Pacific.” That song admonished the mostly white, relatively affluent theater crowd that racism was taught, not inborn, and thus offered hope that a cycle of hate and fear could be broken.

Andy Hammerstein said that his grandfather

embraced and championed many progressive causes at a time when that was a difficult thing to do.

“It was one of many congruent events that ushered in a decade of racial struggle and progress,” Hammerstein said. “That song, preachy as some had complained, remains at least as relevant today as when it was written.”

Oscar Hammerstein II first gave creative voice to his politics in 1927 with “Show Boat,” an epic tale of life on the Mississippi River after the Civil War. In an historic production, blacks and whites not only shared the musical stage, they also shared the plot.

“This was strong stuff back then,” Andy Hammerstein said. “The show and its authors were banned from much of the south for years. After the Great Depression struck, Oscar migrated out to Hollywood to do work-for-hire gigs for movie studios. While there, he founded the Hollywood Anti-Nazi League in 1936 in order to warn Americans about the looming peril of Hitler’s rise to power and to promote the need for international cooperation to contain, by all means necessary, the looming menace overseas.”

Schiff said that a hallmark of Hammerstein’s work “is his abandoning the customary upper class characters and settings influenced by European musical theater in favor of mining the considerable potential of shows about ordinary Americans.

“His opera-loving grandfather would have delighted in the seven-minute soliloquy sung and recited by a carnival barker in ‘Carousel,’ and by Oscar’s relocation of Bizet’s Carmen to the American South in ‘Carmen

Jones,’” she said. “It was not only music, lyrics, libretto and setting that were integrated in his 1927 adaptation with Lorenz Hart of Edna Ferber’s novel ‘Show Boat.’ Blacks and whites are integral to every dimension of this watershed show that transformed American musical theater.”

In the early 1940s, the FBI opened a file on Hammerstein, fleshed out and backdated to include the brouhaha surrounding “Show Boat” and the implicit one-world-order goals of the Anti-Nazi League. The New York and Philadelphia FBI offices coordinated surveillance efforts that included tapping his phone lines, reading his mail, and sometimes tailing his activities, mostly in New York City.

“Despite accusations of ties to known Communists and sympathizers, Oscar II spoke his liberal beliefs clearly: treat all human beings as equals despite race, creed or color,” Andy Hammerstein said. “Oppose both censorship and segregation. Recognize they are the two sides of the same hateful coin. Honor each individual’s right to think one’s mind, speak one’s mind and to assemble without fear. Help those in need, even across borders and ideology. Talk, especially with your enemies. Resist the temptation to demonize those with whom you disagree. Encourage artistic expression, especially in the young and the disadvantaged. Negotiate global solutions for global problems. Above all, put your money where your mouth is.”

JNS.org Wire Service

In 1948, Richard Rodgers, left, Irving Berlin, Oscar Hammerstein II, and Helen Tamiris watch as hopefuls audi-tion on stage at the St. James Theater in Manhattan. Library of Congress.

A Jewish tone for ‘The Sound of Music’

Calendar

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friday [january 4]

Shabbat in Teaneck The Carlebach Minyan joins congregants of the Jewish Center of Teaneck for davening, 4:25 p.m. After the 9 a.m. service on Shabbat morning, at his tish, Rabbi Lawrence Zierler will consider “Whither Pluralism, Its Possibilities and Perils?” Kinder Shul for 3- to 8-year-olds while parents attend services, 10:30. 70 Sterling Place. (201) 833-0515 or www.jcot.org.

Rabbi Steven Weil

Shabbat in Englewood Rabbi Steven Weil, the Orthodox Union’s executive vice president, is scholar-in-residence at Congregation Shomrei Emunah on Shabbat. On Friday evening he will speak at the oneg on “The Defining Issues That Will Shape 21st Century American Jewry.” His Shabbat morning drasha is “Don’t Jew Me;” in the afternoon, he will give a workshop on “The Evolution of the World’s Greatest Leader;” and during seudat shlishit he will tackle “The World’s First BDS Movement.” 9 Huguenot Ave. (201) 567-9420 or [email protected].

Shabbat in Pompton Lakes Students lead services after dinner, 7:30 p.m. 21 Passaic Ave. Reservations, (973) 838-5566

sunday [january 6]

Infant/toddler program in Tenafly Shalom Baby offers a party with Shalom Sesame characters at Temple Sinai of Bergen County, 9:30-10:45 a.m., for infants and children up to 4 years old with parents. Administered by Jewish Federation of Northern New Jersey’s Synagogue Leadership Initiative. 1 Engle St. Risa Tannenbaum, (201) 568-6567 or [email protected].

War veterans meet The Teaneck/New Milford Post #498 Jewish War Veterans meets for breakfast at the American Legion Building in Teaneck, 9:30 a.m. Prospective members welcome. 650 American Legion Drive. Past Commander Stan Hoffman, (201) 836-0814.

Book review The sisterhood of Temple Beth Sholom in Fair Lawn talks about Deborah Feldman’s “Unorthodox” at its annual book review, 10:30 a.m. 40-25 Fair Lawn Ave. (201) 797-9321.

Circus skills workshop The Sisterhood of the Jewish Community Center of Paramus hosts “The Circus Place,” an interactive circus skills workshop that includes juggling, plate spinning, feather balance, and tight wire, presented by Circus Place director Sharyn Brandman, 11 a.m. Registration required. East 304 Midland Ave. (201) 262-7691 or [email protected].

Shabbat in Washington Township Temple Beth Or offers Shabbat Hallelu, a musical family service, 7:30 p.m. 56 Ridgewood Road. (201) 664-7422 or www.templebethornj.org.

Shabbat in Closter Temple Beth El invites the community to join them for a Shabbat service led by Rabbi David S. Widzer and Cantor Rica Timman featuring the music of Debbie Friedman, 7:30 pm. 221 Schraalenburgh Road, Closter. (201) 768-5112.

Shabbat in Wyckoff Temple Beth Rishon holds Shabbat Tzavta (Together), a participatory folk-rock musical service, 8 p.m., with selections from contemporary and classical repertoires, folk rock melodies, liturgical selections, traditional motifs, Israeli melodies, and synagogue melodies from Argentina. Dessert and coffee. 585 Russell Ave. (201) 891-4466 or bethrishon.org.

saturday [january 12]

Shabbat in Teaneck Temple Emeth offers a special Shabbat service and day of learning exploring the themes of “The Zookeeper’s Wife” by Diane Ackerman as part of the Jewish Federation of Northern New Jersey’s “One Book, One Community.” Torah study, 9 a.m.; services and activities, 10:30; kiddush lunch, noon; screening of the documentary “Safe Haven,” 2:30 p.m. 1666 Windsor Road, (201) 833-1322.

Family event The Glen Rock Jewish Center offers family fun night, 6:30-9 p.m., with movies, games, dairy and pareve appetizers, and ice cream sundaes. BYO kosher. 682 Harristown Road. (201) 652-6624 or [email protected].

in new york

wednesday [january 9]

Poland under the Nazi regime The Museum of Jewish Heritage - A Living Memorial to the Holocaust welcomes Yale University professor Timothy Snyder for a conversation with museum director Dr. David G. Marwell on “The Auschwitz Volunteer: Beyond Bravery.” The book, by Witold Pilecki was translated into English by Jarek Garlinski, 7 p.m. Co-sponsored by the Polish Cultural Institute. (646) 437-4202.

singles

tuesday [january 8]

Mingling and trivia in Paramus Jewish Federation of Northern New Jersey’s eNgageNJ, a young leaders group, 22-30, meets at the Orange Lantern for drinks, mixing, and mingling, 7 p.m. Trivia at 8:30. 15 Firehouse Lane. Kimberly Schwartzman, (201) 820-3936 or [email protected].

Congregation B’nai Israel, 11 a.m. Rabbi Ely Allen, director of Hillel of Northern New Jersey, will discuss “Kabbalah: Jewish Mysticism 101.” Transportation provided if needed. 10-10 Norma Ave. (973) 595-0111 or www.jfsnorthjersey.org.

Lunch/games in Edgewater The Englewood & Cliffs Chapter of ORT America holds its winter luncheon and card party at the River Palm Restaurant, noon. Games include cards, mah jongg, Scrabble, and RummiKub. Marilyn, (201) 346-9165.

Book club in Washington Township A book group at the YJCC discusses “The Lost Wife” by Alyson Richman, 7:30 p.m. 605 Pascack Road. Jill Brown, (201) 666-6610, ext. 5812, or [email protected].

thursday [january 10]

Courtesy AdAs emuno

A cappella in Leonia Magevet, the premier Jewish, Hebrew, and Israeli a cappella group at Yale University, performs at Congregation Adas Emuno, 7:30 p.m. Light refreshments. 254 Broad Ave. (201) 592-1712 or www.adasemuno.org.

friday [january 11]

Shabbat in Wayne The Chabad Center of Passaic County offers a Russian-themed Shabbat dinner with entertainment by Hebrew school students, 6 p.m. 194 Ratzer Road. (973) 964-6274 or www.jewishwayne.com.

Shabbat in Paramus The JCC of Paramus hosts a catered Shabbat dinner, beginning with services, 6:45 p.m.; services at 8:30. East 304 Midland Ave. (201) 262-7691 or [email protected].

monday [january 7]

Feature film in Tenafly The Treasure Hunting in Film series at the Kaplen JCC on the Palisades in Tenafly continues a series with Harold Chapler, “Top Films You Might Have Missed,” with a Preston Sturges comedy, “The Lady Eve,” 7:30 p.m. Chapler introduces the film and leads a discussion afterward. (201) 408-1492.

tuesday, [january 8]

Computer open house The Computer Learning Center for Adults (40+) at the Kaplen JCC on the Palisades in Tenafly holds an open house, 10:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Classes for the winter session begin January 17. Discount if you sign up for classes at open house. (201) 569-7900, ext. 309, or jccotp.org.

Rabbi Ely Allen

Program for survivors in Fair Lawn Jewish Family Service of North Jersey offers Café Europa, a program for Holocaust survivors, at the Fair Lawn Jewish Center/


Jewish Federation of Northern New Jersey’s Women’s Philanthropy group offers a program on Thursday, January 10, 10:30 a.m., at Neiman Marcus, Westfield Garden State Plaza in Paramus. Author Rachelle Bergstein discusses her book “Women from the Ankle Down: A Story of Shoes and How They Define Us.” Light brunch; all dietary laws strictly observed. Jennifer Cahn, (201) 820-3906 or [email protected].

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wednesday [january 9]

Senior singles meet Super Singles 65+ meet and schmooze at the JCC Rockland, 7 p.m. Refreshments. 450 West Nyack Road, West Nyack, N.Y. Gene Arkin, (845) 356-5525.

sunday [january 13]

Brunch in Caldwell New Jersey Jewish Singles 45+ meet for brunch at Congregation Agudath Israel, 11:30 a.m. 20 Academy Road. (973) 226-3600, meetup.com (use group name) or [email protected]. For marriage minded Jewish women A seminar, “Inner Self/Outer Self,” offers a spiritual and physical makeover from head to toe with certified

makeup artists, professional hair stylists, a nutritional therapist, personal trainer, spiritual and dating life coach, image consultant/stylist, and Zumba. Bring sneakers. Demonstrations, discussions, applications, refreshments, giveaways, and prizes. Congregation Talmud Torah Adereth El, 2-6:30 p.m. Registration, 1:45. 133 East 29th St., Manhattan, between Lexington and Third Avenue. (973) 851-9070 or [email protected].

thursday [january 17]

Singles mingle in Scotch Plains The B’nai B’rith Young Professional Network, 23-33, offers “Mingle with Jewish Singles” with a happy hour and free appetizers at Stage House Tavern, 5 -7 p.m. 366 Park Ave., Danielle Ross, [email protected].


Israeli dancers in arts weekend The 92Y offers its annual presentation of choreography by Israeli artists working in New York’s 92nd Street Y’s Harkness Dance Center. The special weekend celebra-tion, from January 11 to 13, is in conjunction with the Association of Performing Arts Presenters Conference.

Call (212) 415-5435, [email protected], or www.92Y.org.

Circus workshop in ParamusThe Sisterhood of the Jewish Community Center of Paramus offers an introduction to the core disciplines of the circus: coordination, balance, and fitness, in an interactive circus skill workshop. The program on Sunday, January 4, is for adults, teens, and children.

Skill stations will include juggling, feather balance, plate spinning, and tight wire. For information, call (201) 262-7691 or [email protected].

Author will speak in TenaflyEach year, the Kaplen JCC on the Palisades in Tenafly celebrates the James H. Grossmann Memorial Jewish Book Month to bring the community together in celebration of Jewish life and culture. This year, the adventure continues as author Iris Krasnow discusses her bestseller, “The Secret Lives of Wives: Women Share What It Really Takes to Stay Married.” The talk is set for Wednesday, January 9, at 7:30 p.m.

Krasnow also is the author of the New York Times bestseller “Surrendering to Marriage,” “Surrendering to Motherhood,” “Surrendering to Yourself, and “I Am My Mother’s Daughter.” She has appeared on national shows, including “Oprah” and “Good Morning America.” She lives in Maryland with her husband and four sons.

A book signing and sale will take place after the presentation. Call Sharon Potolsky, (201) 408-1403, or email her at [email protected].

Iris Krasnow Courtesy

of Author

Girl Scout cookies hit the marketThe Girl Scout’s annual cookie sale program begins this weekend. Eight varieties of cookies are offered, at $4 a box. After February 3, girls will continue selling and holding booth sales at area businesses.

The Orthodox Union’s dairy symbol, OU-D, is on Do-si-dos Peanut Butter Cremes, Dulce De Leche Cookies, Samoas, Savannah Smiles, Tagalongs, Thank U Berry Munch, Thin Mints, and Trefoils.

The Girl Scout Cookie program also generates funds for Girl Scouts of Northern New Jersey and helps pay for volunteer screening and training and the maintenance of camp properties and service centers. All cookie proceeds stay in the local community.

Cookie purchases also benefit many local food pantries and organizations. Through the Gift of Caring, customers can buy cookies that will be donated to local charitable organizations.

For information, go to www.gsnnj.org,or call (201) 967-8100.

Queen show to play at Bergen PACQueen’s official tribute show, produced by its drummer Roger Taylor, kicks off its North American tour at the Bergen Performing Arts Center in Englewood. The show is set for Tuesday, January 15, at 8 p.m. Tickets are available at www.ticketmaster.com or www.bergenpac.org or at the box office, (201) 227 1030.

Cellist to concertize at YMCAThe Wayne YMCA begins its Sundays Backstage At the Y series with solo cellist Zoe, who performs pop, jazz, and classical music, on Sunday, January 6, at 11:45 a.m. The cost is $10 per concert or $32 for four shows. The Metro YMCAs are a partner of the YM-YWHA of North Jersey. For information, call Meryl at (973) 595-0100, ext. 257.

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Separation of eglise/etat?French Jews pay a price for the government’s effort to curb extremism

Cnaan Liphshiz

MARSEILLE, France – As a soccer fan and treasurer of Maccabi France, Jean-Marc Krief is more preoccupied with his team’s legwork than with God’s work.

So Krief was dismayed to learn that government officials in southern France were stripping the Marseille branch of the Jewish sports association of longstanding state subsidies because of its “religious affiliations,” as one official put it.

Krief, who met his wife 10 years ago on a hiking trip organized by Maccabi Marseille, says the association’s local branch used to receive about $3,000 annually from the regional government. After several inquiries, he was told that to preserve its funding, the organization would have to include non-Jews on its board. His argument that Maccabi’s activities were secular and open to anyone, Jewish or not, fell on deaf ears.

“We have been receiving a modest subsidy for many years now until August. The rules for applying stayed the same, but we’ve been declined funds because we are suddenly considered ‘religious.’ We don’t have enough money for activities in 2014.”

French Jewish organizations long have relied on public assistance to finance their core operations. But eight groups in the southern French province of Provence-Alpes-Cote d’Azur have been informed that they will not receive any public financing in 2013, according to the CRIF, the umbrella group representing French Jewish communities. In each of the last two years, the groups received a total of $180,000 annually in public subsidies.

Local officials would say little about why the Jewish groups are being denied public support. Gerard-Jose Mattei, a spokesman for the president of the PACA regional council, told JTA only that funding would be given to “organizations that are not religious in essence.”

But to local Jewish leaders, concerns about church-state separation are a red herring. Only Muslim and Jewish groups appear to be affected by the government’s cutbacks, with local Catholic charities, which consume a far larger proportion of public support, seemingly unaffected. Maccabi and other groups, the Jewish leaders say, are collateral damage in the government’s wider effort to counter Muslim extremism and rein in the religious sectarianism that has helped fuel the rise of the French right.

That effort was declared policy under former French President Nicolas Sarkozy, whose center-right government

banned face covering in public spaces, among other controversial laws, but gained new impetus after a Muslim radical murdered four Jews in Toulouse in March. Since then, the government of President Francois Hollande has introduced new anti-jihadist legislation, deported some Muslim clerics, and shaken up France’s domestic intelligence agency.

Michele Teboul, head of the local CRIF branch, says

Jewish interests and freedoms are routinely affected by France’s response to Muslim extremism.

“We’ve seen this in attempts to ban halal slaughter and circumcision, and in how the debate on burkas morphed to suddenly include kippahs,” she said. “It is unjustified, as we have always known how to integrate while retaining our own identity.”

Some 120,000 Jews live in the Marseille region. Besides Maccabi, the affected Jewish groups include the local office of the CRIF; the Marseille Consistoire, which administers religious services; the Bnei Akiva youth movement; and Baskets for Shabbat, a Jewish charity. CRIF’s national president, Richard Prasquier, said the denial of subsidies for Jewish groups was “troubling” but so far it has been limited to the Marseille region.

Controversy surrounding the funding of religious charities is not a new issue in France, which is unique in Europe for enforcing public secularism in a manner similar to the way it is done in the United States. A 1905 law enshrining state secularism prohibits the government from subsidizing religion — a law Krief says was cited by local officials in justifying their denial of funding. But public officials have had wide discretion in applying the law and in the recent past have moved to cut support for groups on the basis of their religious affiliation.

Last year, a Muslim charity in Marseille became the subject of controversy when it was revealed that the charity received $150,000 in subsidies from the regional council in 2010 and 2011. Near Paris, the Franco-Muslim Association of Saint-Gretin last year won a court case against the municipality, which had refused funding to the group because of its name.

Amiens, a city in northern France, forced organizers of the traditional Christmas festival to rename the event “Winter Festival” to win subsidies. And in Paris, city funding for 20 Jewish kindergartens is a point of contention each year, as local politicians hold up its funding as an example of the violation of the principle of

secularism, known in French as “laicite.”“Muslim cultural associations are systematically denied

funding,” Hassen Chalghoumi, the imam of Drancy near Paris, said. The pullback has intensified nationally since the March 19 shooting in Toulouse, he added.

“Some groups are told to change their names, which they won’t do,” Chalghoumi said. “It hurts the moderates and invites extremists to take over with their funding from outside France.”

Jewish groups were offered similar arrangements. Bernard Benguigui, vice president of Baskets for Shabbat, which distributes food to several hundred recipients from a dispensary behind Marseille’s Great Synagogue each week, said he was told that he could continue to receive government funding if he changed his organization’s name to one without “a Jewish connotation.”

“I refused this proposal because government orders to change Jewish names remind me of dark periods,” Benguigui said.

Dozens of government-funded Christian groups in the Marseille area, meanwhile, seem less affected. In 2011, the regional council gave nearly $2.7 million to 30 groups with “Catholic” in their names. Three of the groups told JTA that they were unaware of any planned cutbacks in funding. The website of one group, Secours Catholique, is publicizing a trip to the Holy Land next year, organized in partnership with the regional council.

Still, to some in the Jewish community, the dilemma is fundamentally not one of church-state separation but of using an overly blunt remedy to a problem that requires a more nuanced approach.

“As with other associations that endanger the fabric of society, the solution to depriving hotbeds of Muslim extremism of their funds isn’t blanket measures because those will hurt positive and neutral forces,” said Joel Rubinfeld, the co-chair of the European Jewish Parliament. “What’s needed is a case-by-case analysis and decision.”

JTA Wire Service

Karen Allali, left, of the Jewish Guides and Scouts of France, and Jean-Charles Zerbib, regional liaison to Israel for the Unified Jewish Social Fund, speak in Marseille last fall. Cnaan Liphshiz

“We have been receiving a modest subsidy for many years now until August. The rules for applying stayed the same, but we’ve been declined funds because we are suddenly considered ‘religious.’ We don’t have enough money for activities in 2014.”

— Jean-Marc Krief

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EngagEmEnt

Storfer/EfratiMandy Storfer, daughter of Linda and Bennett Storfer of Teaneck, and Etan Efrati, son of Rachel and Sassoon Efrati of Queens, N.Y., are engaged. The couple recently made aliyah and live in Jerusalem.

The future bride is a University of Maryland graduate and earned a master’s in accounting from Notre Dame University. She works as an auditor in Ernst and Young’s Tel Aviv office.

The future groom, a University of Massachusetts graduate, works in real estate for the Woodley Group in Jerusalem.

A May wedding in New York is planned.

B’nai mitzvah

Alexandria MuradAlexandria “Lexi” Murad, daughter of Jacob Murad and Tamara Kerr of Teaneck, and sis-ter of Ethan, celebrated becom-ing a bat mitzvah on December 29 at Congregation Beth Sholom in Teaneck.

Liza Spector

Liza Spector, daughter of Susan and Craig Spector of Woodcliff Lake and sister of Josh, Jillian, and Margo, celebrated becom-ing a bat mitzvah on December 27 in Israel. The family belongs to Temple Emanuel of the Pascack Valley in Woodcliff Lake.

Celebrate your simchawe welcome announcements of readers’ bar/bat mitzvahs,

engagements, marriages and births. announcements are free, but there is a $10 charge for photographs, which must be accompanied by a stamped, self-addressed envelope if the photograph is to be

returned. there is a $10 charge for mazal tov announcements plus a $10 photograph charge.

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OBituariEs

Betty RosenbergBetty Rosenberg, née Rothstein, 86, of Fort Lee, formerly of Woodcliff Lake and Teaneck, died on Dec. 28.

Born in Brooklyn, N.Y., she is survived by her husband, Fred, and children, Esta of Washington, D.C., and Bernard of Houston, Texas; grandchildren, Rebecca, Kate, and Rachel; and a step-grandchild, Jake.

Arrangements were by Gutterman and Musicant Jewish Funeral Directors, Hackensack.

This week’s Torah commentary is on page 32.

Obituaries

are prepared with information

provided by funeral homes.

Correcting

errors is the responsibility

of the funeral home.

Rita Levi Montalcini, Nobel Prize winner, dies at 103Rita Levi Montalcini, an Italian Jewish bi-ologist who defied World War II fascist anti-Semitism and went on to win a Nobel Prize in medicine, died in her sleep on Sunday. She was 103.

Levi Montalcini, who never married, was born in Turin in 1909. During World War II, be-cause of anti-Semitic restrictions imposed by Italy’s fascist government, she worked secretly in a clandestine laboratory that she built in her bedroom.

She and her family fled Turin in 1941, first to a mountain village and, in 1943, to Florence, where they spent the rest of the war in hiding. After the war, Levi Montalcini moved to the United States and eventually divided her time between there and Italy.

In 1986 she shared the Nobel Prize in medi-cine with American biochemist Stanley Cohen for groundbreaking research, carried out in the United States, unlocking the mysteries of the cell.

Tributes poured in from across the Italian spectrum for one of Italy’s most admired and honored women. The Rome newspaper Il Messaggero said news of her death was greet-ed on the Internet “with the same affection and same outpouring of messages as would have accompanied the death of a rock star or cinema idol.’

Recognized as a moral as well as intellectu-al authority, Montalcini was named a Senator for Life, one of Italy’s highest honors, in 2001.

According to President Giorgio Napolitano, “A luminous figure in the history of science has passed away.” He praised Levi-Montalcini’s scientific work as well as her commitment to fostering the rights of women.

Rome’s Mayor Gianni Alemanno called her death a great loss “for all of humanity” and said Levi Montalcini had represented “civic conscience, culture and the spirit of research of our time.” JTA Wire Service

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800.813.0557 | mazon.org

Photo licensed under Creative Commons from flickr user [auro].

We don’t blame you for feeling tired of hearing stories about the ever-growing number of families struggling with hunger.

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1 Sixth and seventh graders from Temple Emanu-El in Closter and their rabbi, David-Seth Kirshner,

pictured right, visited the Museum of Jewish Heritage – A Living Memorial to the Holocaust in Battery Park on December 16. Courtesy temple emanu-el

2 The Men’s Club of Shomrei Torah in Wayne ran another successful blood drive on December

18 with 24 units of blood collected in support of the community. Another drive is planned for June. Roni Mishpati, an emissary from Israel from the Jewish Agency, is pictured donating. She works to support Israeli programming at the Jewish Federation of North Jersey, Wayne YMCA, and with the Israeli Scouts of Fair Lawn. Courtesy shomrei torah

3 Israeli soldiers at the Leekdod Hagoush Army base in Gush Etzion received letters of support

from the students of the Gerrard Berman Day School, Solomon Schechter of North Jersey. During a mission with the North Jersey group of the Jewish Women’s Renaissance Project, a GBDS parent, Marcia Harvey, delivered the letters to IDF soldiers who served in Operation Pillar of Defense. Courtesy GBDs

4 Congregants of Temple Emeth in Teaneck celebrated the synagogue’s 65th anniversary

during services on December 14. The day included music by the adult choir, Kol Emet, and reminisces by longtime member June Moss Handler. Here, from left, are Rabbi Joshua Leighton, Cantor Ellen Tilem, Rabbi

Steven Sirbu, and New Jersey State Senator Loretta Weinberg, who presented a proclamation. photo By

BarBara Balkin

5 Rabbi Mark Wildes, founder of the Manhattan Jewish Experience, left, with his brother, Michael

Wildes, a former mayor of Englewood; Great Britain’s chief rabbi, Lord Jonathan Sacks, and the Wildes’ father, Leon Wildes, founding partner of Wildes and Weinberg PC, at the 17th annual Ruth B. Wildes Memorial Hazkara lecture series at the Jewish Center in New York City. More than 500 people attended the event, where Sacks addressed “Jewish Pride In an Age of Multiculturalism.” Courtesy miChael WilDes


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$13 tickets for 13 shows: BergenPAC celebratesBergen Performing Arts Center in Englewood is celebrat-ing 2013 with a special promotion: 13 different shows for $13 a ticket. There is a limited supply of discounted tickets available. Tickets can be ordered by using the code 13for2013 at Ticketmaster.com or by calling (201) 227-1030 or through the BergenPAC box office 30 North Van Brunt St. in Englewood. This promotion can’t be combined with any other offer and is not retroactive.

Shows for which tickets are available include “The Little Prince,” “Room 105: The Highs and Lows of Janis Joplin,” and the Popovich Pet Theater, as well as per-formances by The Preservation Hall Jazz Band, Vanilla Fudge, and Physical Graffiti. A full list is available at http://www.bergenpac.org.

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287 Farrant Ter. $299,900Pretty S/H Col. LR, FDR, Den/Off, MEIK w/ Granite Counters, 3 BRs, 2 F Bths. Fin Attic. Rec Rm Bsmnt. H/W Flrs. Deck. Gar.

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REAL ESTATE & buSinESS noTES

Living with cancer at workGilda’s Club Northern New Jersey is offering a lecture and a question and answer session on living with can-cer at work, featuring attorneys Jonathan Nirenberg and Natalia Shishkin.

Topics that will be covered include taking time off under the Family and Medical Leave Act, reasonable accommodations, and what to do if you are fired from work because of the cancer.

The lecture is Wednesday, January 16, from 6:30 to 8 p.m. at Gilda’s Club Northern Jersey, 575 Main St., Hackensack.

Please call (201) 457-1670 to reserve a space in the lecture.

The Teaneck Chamber of Commerce will be hold its an-nual general membership meeting at 8:30 a.m. on Tuesday, January 8, at the offices of Davis, Saperstein & Salomon PC, 375 Cedar Lane, Teaneck. At this meeting, the Chamber membership will also be able to vote for members of the 2013 Board of Trustees for the Chamber. The following po-sitions and names nominated are up for election:

President (2-year term): Larry Bauer, Bauer Printing Company; Vice-President (1-year term): Jennifer Glass, Credit Cards, NJ; Treasurer (1-year term): Allen Ezrapour, Citibank (Paramus); Secretary (2-year term): Yolanda Andrews, Five Star Premier Senior Residence

Members-at-large (1-year term): Patrick Finnegan, Holy Name Medical Center; Emin Kahyaoglu, Kismet Limousine; Handan Koch, Oritani Bank; Genesis Liu, Snukums n’ Snooks; Garry Salomon, Davis, Saperstein & Salomon, PC; Fernando Sosa, HaonTech; Heritage Pointe Senior Residences

Nominations may also be made up until the elections by contacting a current member of the board and indicating your interest in seeking a seat on the 2013 board. In order to be eligible to vote and serve as a board member, one must be a paid-in-full member of the Chamber for the 2012 year. To RSVP, please e-mail [email protected] and put general membership meeting in the subject line.

To receive additional information on the Teaneck Chamber of Commerce, its activities, programs, membership, or to get on their e-mail list, visit the Chamber’s website at www.teaneckchamber.org, con-tact the Chamber office at (201) 801-0012, or e-mail at [email protected].

Teaneck Chamber of Commerce to meet and vote trustees

Find recipes at www.jstandard.com

COOKING WITH BETH

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AbigAil Klein leichmAn

A nybody can plunk down some potted trees and pretty planters on a roof, but a rooftop garden

does not offer the same environmental and ecological benefits as a “green roof” — a layer of low-maintenance vegetation that insulates the building underneath and reduces flash flooding on paved streets below by acting as a sponge for rainfall.

Professor Leon Blaustein, director of the University of Haifa’s new Green Roofs Ecology Center, says the Israeli center is the first of its kind in the Middle East and one of the first worldwide to focus specifically on how to conserve biodiversity in an urban setting.

“When you create a city, you’re destroying much of the natural habitat for plants and animals, and we want to mitigate this as much as possible with our rooftop habitats,” Blaustein said.

Blaustein and his team have installed 48 experimental modules on top of the university’s Student Union, each with a different growing material, drainage configuration and plant grouping.

Ecology researchers around the world

will be watching as the Israelis monitor how well each of the modules thrives and attracts insects, birds and other fauna, in the hope of determining the most successful recipe for developing biodiverse green roofs in arid climates.

Eventually, they hope to create experimental green roof plots on additional buildings on the campus and around the city of Haifa, as well as other Israeli cities.The Green Roofs Ecology Center will pro-vide an unusual outdoor laboratory for ecology and evolutionary biology research-ers from around the world to develop and test ecological theories, said Blaustein, who heads the university’s Community Ecology Laboratory.

“We’re just getting started. We are looking for collaborators outside the university, such as government and NGO officials,” said Blaustein, who has been in touch with interested scientists from Switzerland and the United States.

The project got up and running thanks to an overseas donor and input from University of Haifa pollination and plant ecologist Amos Dafni, landscape ecologist

Turning Israeli roofs into green habitats

Lior Blank, environmental management expert Shay Levy, geography professors Noam Greenbaum and Dan Malkinson, and London green roofs and eco-design expert Gary Grant.

Doctoral candidate Amiel Vasl is in charge of the experiment on the Student Union building, while master’s degree candidate Ariel Solodar will be testing the feasibility of using “gray water” coming from the building’s sinks to irrigate the plants.

Blaustein explains that the growing substrate and foliage on green roofs keep buildings insulated from heat and cold so there is less need to use energy for keeping

the interior at a comfortable temperature. And by soaking up rain before it hits the non-absorbent asphalt or concrete below, green roofs can prevent flash flooding in urban environments.

The center was inaugurated in October with the backing of an international advisory board that includes, among others, eco-architect Ayal Ronen from Bezalel Academy of Art and Design in Jerusalem; Rakefet Sinai, an architect affiliated with the Technion-Israel Institute of Technology; and Howard Wenger, California-based president of SunPower and various gardening companies.

Israel21c.org

Garden with a view: Some 48 experimental modules are planted on the University of Haifa’s Green Roofs Ecology Center.

The Israeli team is studying how to conserve plant and insect species in an urban setting.

This World:

The Jewish Values Network and West Side Institutional Synagogue presents

GEFEN PUBLISHING HOUSE

Challenging God in the Face of Tragedy and Suf fering

the fed-up man of faith

Shmuley BoteachForeword by Dennis Prager

“Rabbi Shmuley has the courage to take on a subject that most simply accept as a way of life. The Fed-Up Man of Faith provides answers to questions that have plagued humans since they first experienced suffering. You will be hard-pressed to find a more thought-provoking book.”

Dr. Phil McGraw, host, The Dr. Phil Show

“A powerful, moving, and unprecedented book which gives eloquent voice to the critical spirit of human defiance.”

Rt. Hon. Cory Booker, Mayor of Newark

“Rabbi Shmuley insists that the only proper response to injustice is to challenge God for letting it occur. Provocative and heartfelt, the book offers a distinctive approach to the problems of suffering and evil.”

Noah Feldman, Bemis Professor of International Law, Harvard University

“Rabbi Boteach is devout, but inquisitive. He combines reverence with sly jokes, humane reflection with provocation. He entertains, while focusing on serious matters. He is very much worth reading.”

Douglas J. Feith, Hudson Institute Senior Fellow; former Under Secretary of Defense

“Surprising and sometimes provocative.… This one is really worth reading.”Michael Steinhardt, Wall Street legend; co-founder, Birthright Israel

“Drawing on Job, Rabbi Boteach has written an important book to guide questing and unsettled souls.”Rabbi David Wolpe, Sinai Temple in Los Angeles; author of Why Faith Matters

“Great comfort for those of us who are spiritual seekers, and who continually struggle to define our relationship with our creator.”

Alan Colmes, The Alan Colmes Show; author of Thank the Liberals for Saving America

“Like scaffolding around the rock of our faith.… Essential reading for those who think hard about their beliefs.”

Uri Geller, www.urigeller.com

“It’s reassuring to know that leaders such as Rabbi Shmuley Boteach are there to help us find meaning in the toughest of times.”

Josh Mandel, Treasurer of Ohio; two-tour Iraq War veteran, U.S. Marine Corps

“Can we eradicate suffering altogether? Must we? The answer flies right back at us in the form of another question: what are you doing to reduce another’s suffering? Brilliant!”

Kevin Bermeister, founder, Jerusalem 5800; founding investor, Skype

RELIGION

Est. 1981

JERUSALEM NEW YORKpublishing house בית הוצאה לאור

the fed

-up m

an of faith

Sh

mu

ley Bo

teach

RELIGION

Where was the hand of God on 9/11?

Was God absent from the crematoria of Auschwitz?

Does pain make us into more sensitive people?

Can a person question God and still be righteous?

Rabbi Shmuley Boteach tackles the ultimate, timeless questions that go to the heart of the human condition – and arrives at some surprising answers.

Drawing on numerous confrontations with God from the Bible, and using examples of appalling suffering from today’s headlines, Rabbi Shmuley argues forcibly against those who implicate man and exonerate God for human suffering and boldly guides us to the conclusion that challenging God and His actions is not just our right but our foremost obligation as human beings.

This revolutionary argument turns millennia of mistaken belief on its head, providing a concrete action plan for emboldening ourselves against victimhood. If life has ever defeated you, or if you have ever felt let down by G-d, this is the book for you.

Shmuley Boteach, “America’s Rabbi,” is one of the foremost spiritual leaders and values exponents of our time. The author of twenty-eight books, which have been translated into eighteen languages,

Rabbi Shmuley’s syndicated columns and TV and radio shows appear in media throughout the world. Rabbi Shmuley was labeled “a cultural phenomenon” and “the most famous rabbi in America” by Newsweek magazine, one of the fifty most influential Jewish personalities in the world by the Jerusalem Post, and is the only rabbi ever to win the highly prestigious London Times Preacher of the Year award. Having served for eleven years as rabbi at the University of Oxford, Rabbi Shmuley now lives in Englewood, NJ, with his Australian wife Debbie. They have nine children. Follow him on his website, www.shmuley.com Twitter@RabbiShmuley.

Gefen Publishing House Ltd.Jerusalem ٠ New York

Printed in Israel

Bret Stephens Wall Street Journal

noah feldman H a rva rd Law ScHo oL

f e a t u r i n g

Rabbi Shmuley Boteach

Thursday January 10

TickeTs: $20$15 seniors and Wsis members$10 sTudenTs WiTh id

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WesT side insTiTuTional synagogue, 120 WesT 76Th sTreeT, neW york, ny

has god turned on america?on america?the Fed-up man oF FaFaF ith

has god Turned on america?a paneL diScuSSion for rabbi SHmuLey boteacH’S new book:

The Fed-uP man oF FaiThChallenging God in the Face of tragedy and Suffering

buy your TickeTs online: WWW.Wsisny.org

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[email protected] · [email protected] · www.MironProperties.com/NJ

Each Miron Properties office is independently owned and operated.

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Jeffrey SchleiderBroker/Owner

Miron Properties NY

Ruth Miron-SchleiderBroker/Owner

Miron Properties NJ

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[email protected] · [email protected] · www.MironProperties.com/NJ

Each Miron Properties office is independently owned and operated.

Contact us for your complimentary consultation

Jeffrey SchleiderBroker/Owner

Miron Properties NY

Ruth Miron-SchleiderBroker/Owner

Miron Properties NJ

10 LEXINGTON COURT 184 SHERWOOD PLACE 360 AUDUBON ROAD 248 CHESTNUT STREET

386 CUMBERLAND STREET 249 EVERETT PLACE 300 BROAD AVENUE 167 VAN NOSTRAND AVE

121-B E. PALISADE AVE 350 ELKWOOD TER 113 E. HUDSON AVE 400 JONES ROAD

370 ELKWOOD TER 280-290 E. LINDEN AVE 136 E. HAMILTON AVE 98 HILLSIDE AVE

68-D DWIGHT PLACE 571 NEXT DAY HILL DR 440 ELKWOOD TER 139 CHESTNUT STREET

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READERS’CHOICE

2012

FIRST PLACEBUTCHER#1

BUTCHER

* While supplies last the week of January 6.

Mashgiach Temidi / Open 7:00 am Sunday through Friday · Now closing Friday at 2:00 pm

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Zena’s Chocolate Chunk Brownie

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Enjoy Life Crunchy Vanilla Honey Graham

EZ Gourmet Marble Delight Cookies

Finchi’s Decadent Chocolate Mousse

New Jersey Jewish Standard, Jan. 4, 2013

Documents

Transcript of New Jersey Jewish Standard, Jan. 4, 2013