Healthy Relationships vs.

Unhealthy Relationships

Healthy & Unhealthy Relationships

You have (will have) relationships with:› Family› Friends› Romantic Partner

Family: Healthy Relationships

Communicate with each other Develop ways to value boundaries Build trust and respect

Friends: Healthy Relationships

Everyone needs friends! One you regard with affection, trust,

and respect True friends listen and respect each

other Be supportive, encouraging,

considerate Peer pressure can play a major role…

don’t give in!!

Romantic: Healthy Relationships

Signs:› Loving and taking care of yourself› Respecting your partner’s right to be

himself/herself› Having a life outside of the relationship› Making decisions together (compromising)

Unhealthy Relationships Focusing all energy on your partner Trying to change your partner to be

what you want them to be Dropping friends and family One partner makes all decisions One partner yells, hits, or throws things

during arguments

Healthy Relationships Traits:

› Honesty› Trust› Compromise› Respect› Support› Caring› Good communication

Scenarios! In groups of 4-5

› Each group is given a scenario to read, discuss, and share with the group

› As a group you must decide what aspects of the scenario are healthy and which are unhealthy; you may also share ways to improve the unhealthy aspects

› Your group needs to decide group roles1. 1 person is the writer2. 1 person is the reader3. 2-3 people are the presenters

All group members must help brainstorm

For each scenario name:

Love or Infatuation? (1 word, phrase, or reason to justify)

Healthy or Unhealthy? (1 word, phrase, or reason to justify)

“ My boyfriend likes for me to call him right away when I get home from work...he loves talking to me.”

Healthy or Unhealthy?Love or Infatuation?

“ I enjoy hanging out with my girlfriend because she helps me with my math, so that I can do well and pass the course.”

Healthy or Unhealthy?Love or Infatuation?

Healthy or Unhealthy?Love or Infatuation?

Healthy or Unhealthy?Love or Infatuation?

Healthy or Unhealthy?Love or Infatuation?

Healthy or Unhealthy?Love or Infatuation?

Healthy or Unhealthy?

“I need the computer please.”“I have work to do, can I use it for 20

more minutes, and then you can have it for the next 2 hours?”

“Ok, that works for me.”

What I Value in Relationships

Name of Person you have relationship with

Qualities you like about this relationship

Qualities you don’t like about this relationship

What tells you about the qualities you value in a relationship

1. 1. 1.

2. 2. 2.

3. 3. 3.

We’ve all read stories about two people who meet, fall deeply in love, and live happily ever after. But we all know that life is not that simple. People sometimes fall out of love, and even those who stay together the rest of their lives have some unhappy times and they must work to improve their relationship. However, it’s ok to dream about a perfect partner, it may help us recognize those we want to spend our lives with or have close relationships with.

My Perfect Mate (MPM)

1. I do/do not want MPM to be like me.

2. Characteristics your parents would want in your perfect mate.

Find 10 words that represent the qualities you most want in your perfect mate.

Beautiful Active FunnyReligious Passive QuietHappy Generous WittyMusical Brave SelflessProudLoyal MatureFriendly Outgoing CaringOpen Clean HelpfulAthletic Modest Hard-workingArtistic Smart Thoughtful

My Perfect Mate (MPM)

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Remember that in ANY relationship, you: Have the right to feel safe at all times. Have the right to express your own

ideas and say no to something you don't like.

Aren’t responsible for another person's actions even if they say you provoke them.

Never deserve to be abused in any way.

When you enter into a healthy relationship, how should you act?

How do you make decisions with your partner as to how you will act sexually?

Sexual Decision Making

Sexual Decision Making What I Need:

› To decide what you value› Clarify whether you want to

become involved sexually or not

How do I decide?› You must act according to

your conscience› You must accept the

consequences

Sexual Morality Includes1. Physical risks such as STD’s, STI’s, AIDS,

pregnancy2. Psychological and emotional concerns

1. May unleash many emotions: fear, guilt, remorse, anxiety, poor self-esteem

2. Should be a free choice, with no pressures3. Must consider the meaning you wish

sexuality to have for you

Sexual Decision Making

What does the Catholic Church

Say About Sexual Intercourse?

We are all sexual and drawn toward relationships (casual and intimate)

Full sexual intimacy is intended only for marriage

Sexual intercourse is not meant to be used to ‘fulfill’ cravings (attraction, satisfy sexual feelings, express youthful love)

Sexual intercourse is a sign of fully committed love

It is a gift that man and woman offer to each other in marriage

Sexual Decision Making &The Catholic Church

“If you don’t stand for something,you’ll fall foranything”.

Are Abstinence and Chastity the same thing?

Both are important, but very different.

Sexual Decision Making

NO WAY!!!

Abstinence: simply means saying “NO”; avoiding certain things (ex. Meat on Fridays, chocolate before dinner, sex before marriage);

Sexual Decision Making

Chastity: controlling sexuality appropriate to your relationship; it is a virtue, not a habit; a virtue of understanding and respecting sex to such a great degree that one keeps it in appropriate time and place (marriage)

Sexual Decision Making

Close your eyes, sit quietly, and listen...

Think about your initial reactions/thoughts....

Choosing to engage in sexual activity?

Why?

Why not?

Risks involved:

Choosing to engage in sexual activity?

Remember..... Chastity makes us truly free Human sexuality is a gift from God,

we must learn to control physical and emotional urges

Good relationships take time and need to develop ‘strong roots’

Loving does not mean sex Intimacy does not mean sex