W i n t e r 2 0 1 1

O B L A T E S St. Benedict Monastery, 9535 Linton Hall Rd, Bristow, VA 20136

Phone: 703-361-0106

Email: oblates@osbva.org

Sitting here at the computer this morning, looking out onto a blanket of white dotted with red and blue as the cardinals and blue jays frolic in the snow, my heart is filled with wonder and awe as I contemplate the beauty of the season, and God’s blessings for us. All of us at the Monastery are so grateful to have our sisters home with us again and to experience them as they heal and grow from all they have gone through these past months.

As we begin this year we can pause to remember the celebration of our thirty years as an Oblate community. A grateful thanks to Debby Fancher and all who helped to make the day a wonderful remembrance of all we have experienced through the years and all the ways we have grown.

With all this growing, we have now been able to put into place a formal forma-tion program and an Oblate council to support the many new members seeking God through our way of life. Benedict continues to call men and women to follow his way of love and to carry his message to a world hungry for Benedictine values.

For the first time we hosted the regional Oblate retreat. Our Oblates outdid themselves providing hos-pitality and welcome to all our guests from Emmanuel, Ridgely, and Saint Anselm’s Monasteries and Saint Benedict’s parish in Baltimore. Sister Cecilia’s presentation was thought provoking, challenging and well re-ceived by all.

In November we had our annual Oblate retreat and eighty people attended from our Richmond, Bed-ford and Bristow deaneries. Father Raymond spoke to us on the themes of forgiveness, reconciliation, prayer, hospitality and Lectio. We will be reflecting and unpacking the wisdom received from Father Raymond and Sister Cecilia for a long time. A heartfelt thanks to both of them for sharing their wisdom with us

Our Oblates now have beautiful shirts thanks to Greg Evans, who designed and made them available to our Oblate community. If you did not already order one, we are sure he will be taking orders again soon. They are really beautiful.

Our monthly presentations this year by our Oblates and Sisters using the book, Running with Expand-ing Heart, and the parables of Jesus have also been well received and challenge us to see God in all the events and circumstances of out lives.

May you all be blessed abundantly in the coming year as we continue to love, support and pray for one another.

New Year Blessings from Sr. Charlotte Lee and Kathy Frick, Oblate Co-Directors

An Evening with Esther de Waal, submitted by Kathy Frick

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Sister Charlotte Lee and I had a delightful evening in November when we attended a presentation by writer and lecturer, Esther de Waal, at St. James Episcopal Church in Leesburg, VA. Standing in the historic church, Esther spoke simply and from her heart. She discovered Benedict and his Rule, she said, not through spiritual searching but rather because her husband was appointed to Canterbury Cathedral and she found herself living in a house that had been part of the medieval monastic community. At one point she was exploring an underground system of passages between the buildings. Looking at the ancient and marvelously put together stone work of the tunnels, she realized just how long monks had been at Canterbury. She decided to do further research into the history of the place. It was there she encountered Benedict and she has been studying, writing and lecturing on the Rule every since. Over the centuries, she said, the Rule has been a source of guidance, support, challenge, instruction, comfort and discomfort to thousands. It comforts while it moves us to discomfort whenever we decide to dally instead of go forward in our spiritual journey. She noted that she prefers regulum, which is a feminine noun for Rule, as it connotes more of the word guide, which is something we need to hold onto for our journey. The Rule always provides us with the challenge of change. While discussing some of the areas where the Rule has impacted on history, as well as present day spirituality, she mentioned in passing that the novel Catcher in the Rye has 50,000 words; the Rule has not yet 10,000. One of the most important things she said she found in her study of the Rule is the need for stability, in its many forms. She quoted Archbishop Rowan Williams of Canterbury, “God says, ‘Sit where I can see you.’” When she prays with icons, she said, “I gaze at God; God gazes at me. A mystery to remain a mystery.” Benedict understood this when he fled Rome seeking God. He took his nurse with him into his hermit existence – in other words, he took his own figure of wisdom. Gregory speaking of Benedict says, “He held himself still before the gaze of God.” We should have a heart of stillness so we can hear the voice of God within us, she reflected. One of the reasons Benedict commands so much respect, she asserted, is that he writes out of his own experiences, not theories. Neither does Benedict give ethical instruction, but he gives pictures for us to mull over. A good example is the porter of the monastery (Chapter 66), who stands on the threshold, one foot in the world, one in the monastery. He greets not only people but events with the same, “Thanks be to God that you have come.” The porter provides oblates especially with an image of how to live the Rule. Continued on next page…..

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Speaking on the instructions about the Liturgy of the Hours within the Rule, she focused on the Hour of Vigils. Are we, as Benedictines, going to keep watch for those who are sleeping? Are we awake ourselves? Like the Liturgy of the Hours, have we marked off a time to study, time to work with their hands and, above all, time for prayer, in our own inner cloister?

The Benedictine motto, Ora et Labora, could just as easily be translated, Esther said, as people who live by the Book and by the Plow. Benedict did not use words carelessly. Rather, he sought to provide inner guidance be-yond the surface of his words, Esther said. One of those multi-layered words was cour-tesy, which Benedict urges his followers to practice with each other. Courtesy, she said, is an old fashioned word. It doesn’t mean just with good manners, but to deal with others gently and in a non-judging stance.

Further on Esther commented about how Benedict used scripture with the story of the Prodigal Son. The Rule’s Prologue is based on the baptismal instruction given to adults in the time of Benedict. Placing ourselves in the person of the Prodigal Son, Benedictines can find the origins of the three vows. Finding himself amongst the pigs, the Prodigal Son finally listens to what his father had tried to tell him before he left and now sees himself and his true situation; he achieves clarity and begins to see something of what God wants for him. His listening intently translates into obedience. Having listened with what we would call the ear of his heart, the Prodigal Son now turns from his previous path and returns to his true way by going home. The second vow: Conversatio (moving forward all the time), through never-ending transformation. At last he is home. The third vow: Stability, staying still and being steadfast in our own selves and in our search for God. Making the final commitment – I AM PRESENT! Using another scriptural example, Esther stated, “We cannot be like Lot’s wife. We must be curious, open to the new. Always asking, ‘Is this God’s will? Or is this my own will?’” We only know if we are liv-ing mindfully and not mindlessly.

Esther lives today in a small cottage on the Welsh/English border. “Benedict told me I was to handle the tools of my daily life with the same awe and respect as the holy vessels on the altar. For me, the everyday – the earth, routine chores, our own flesh, all become sacred. If we are to handle ‘tools’ in such a way, how then should we handle people? Including our-selves?”

In her concluding prayer she likened Benedict as a burning and shining light of the church. “God, enflame us with Benedict’s sense of urgency and his sense of patience.”

Current events from the Nevada Deanery Submitted by Sharon Hennessy-Bonas

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A happy and blessed New Year to all of you near and those of you not so near. Many miles might separate us, yet each of you is held dear in our hearts and in our prayers. Months have passed since our last communication, affording me this perfect opportunity to update you on our activities.

We began reading Radical Hospitality last year. Chapter by chapter, we have been meeting as a group to discuss how our lives are intertwined into the readings.

The dialogue has been revealing and the word "hospitality" has taken on new meaning and understand-ing in our lives. It has been brought to light how many of us unknowingly employ "hospitality" in much of what we already do. For some of us the readings have opened opportunities to incorporate more "hospitality" into what we do. All in all, the sharing has been very good and spiritually bonding for us as Oblates.

To keep in step with our Oblates back east who have been reading a book on the Parables of Jesus, we asked our two priests to give us a talk on the Parables. Father Paul concentrated on his favorite Parable on the treasure buried in a field. Father Nathan will give us a talk in March.

Our January meeting is always one of our favorites. After business matters are discussed, we share with our group the Oblate from our deanery whom we have individually been praying for during the last six months. Then, if we choose to, we discuss the "word" we received when we selected it in a sealed envelope. Tender stories of the impact that little word or two has on our lives deeply touches all of us closely listen-ing. We live with that word, from St. Benedict's Rule, for six months. Six months seems like an ade-quate amount of time for the word to evolve with some personal meaning and value.

Somehow God always seems to know the word we each need the most. It never ceases to amaze us. Some of the words are as follows: study, devotion, make peace, humility, obedience, discipline, perseverance, seek God, patience, change, moderation, listen, prayer, openness, and community,

In May of 2010, we met for our annual retreat. We joyfully welcomed Sister Charlotte Lee and Kathy Frick. Under the care and direction of God, we received a much needed "shot of rejuvenation". The topics of love, trust, and humility dispensed the perfect supplements to fortify our souls, spirits, and strengthen us in our efforts to live the Rule of St. Benedict. We are all called to love one another through our ministries, whether in the church, in the community, at work, nurturing ailing spouses, or guiding children or grandchildren. It is a necessity to be infused with inspiration to do so. We welcomed and absorbed this wonderful opportunity.

We renewed our vows and witnessed the reception of our two new Oblate novices, Mary Johnson and Valarie Nunes. We look forward to their gifts and talents. Invitations are always extended to others to join us in morning prayer or our monthly meeting in hope that others will journey with us under the God-guarded precepts of St. Benedict.

The announcement was made that at the conclusion of May 2011, when we break from our monthly meetings for the summer, our beloved dean, Almita Bey-Carrion, will retire from her ever loving and guiding leadership responsibilities. After six years, Almita feels it is time to pass the torch and experience God in other ways. Sharon Hennessy-Bonas will assume the role of dean with Joan Hall sharing the responsibilities as assistant dean. With open minds and hearts, Sharon and Joan will attempt to carry on the wonderful work set forth by Almita. Graceful and blessed, Almita has touched many.

Mother Teresa; Come Be My Light, The Private Writings of the Saint of Calcutta by Brian Kolodiejchek, MC, Reviewed by Vonda Sines

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Despite the many photos of her frailty in her last years, it’s hard to believe that Mother Teresa would have turned 100 this year. Individuals of many faiths remember her achievements – including the 1979 Nobel Peace Prize – as well as her often-noted comment that she considered herself just “a pencil in God’s hand.”

Her story is a familiar one to millions. Mother Teresa is known for humility and untiring service to the poorest of the poor. Her journey as a young woman from Skopje to Indian citizenship was an amazing one. When it was pub-lished, this book told us something else about Mother Teresa: she had secrets.

Although the bulk of this volume consists of copies of handwritten notes and letters Mother Teresa wrote to her religious superiors and confessors, it’s helpful to know a bit about its author. Fr. Brian Kolodiejchuk, M.C., Ph.D. is a Canadian who met Mother Teresa in 1977 and who remained connected to her until her 1997 death. When the Missionaries of Charity Fathers was founded in 1984, he joined the order. He is also postulator of the Cause of Beatification and Canonization of Mother Teresa of Calcutta and serves as director of the Mother Teresa Center.

On the surface, Mother Teresa’s correspondence suggests a nun who was dedicated and extremely persistent – to the point of rebuke by a superior. The reasons behind these attributes appear to be tied to at least three secrets.

The first has to do with the difference between her private spiritual life and the genuine devotion so obvious in public. The book reveals that Mother Teresa for decades experienced darkness during which she felt entirely cut off from the Trinity. She heard no answer when she called. She practiced her vocation essentially on faith.

An even greater shock is that for so many years, Mother Teresa revealed to no one the private vow she made after she promised to serve the poorest of the poor. Even Sister Nirmala, her successor as superior of the Missionaries of Charity, had no idea this vow existed. Only in her later years did she reveal to a few religious leaders the second vow, which was to deny Christ nothing. It was apparently the source of her annoying persistence when she needed permission for almost anything from her superiors as well as what sustained her through repeated exhaustion and physical ailments without any complaints whatsoever.

The last secret is undoubtedly the most perplexing. Mother Teresa’s writings make it clear that she sought just one thing: total intimacy with Christ through serving him. Pop psychologists might have a field day with the idea, per-haps suggesting it had to do with the death of her father as a child. What was the source of this desire? Did it generate from her (as the writings suggest), or was it a response to an invitation? If we were able to ask her, would she even an-swer? Time and time again, she wrote that she wanted to describe what she was feeling but was at a total loss for words.

Although Come Be My Light is the source of many details of the daily life of Mother Teresa and her fellow Mis-sionaries of Charity, the book’s most intriguing appeal is in showing us a glimpse of how complex an individual this “living saint” truly was. Every time we think we’ve begun to figure out what made her tick, another facet of her faith or personality emerges. Given the secrets she kept, it’s impossible not to wonder if anyone on this earth really knew her or just thought that was the case.

Regardless, she willingly answered the call to bring God’s light - his hospitality - to the neglected, the sick, the destitute and the outcast. She saw Christ in each and every one of them. And despite her years of darkness and yearning for greater intimacy with Him, she continually sought to be a transparent person through whom God’s light could shine without any earthly impediment.

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News Updates • In June, 2010, Sister Glenna Smith, OSB was elected president of the

Federation of Saint Scholastica.

• In September, 2010, Rosa Farrar, entered the Benedictine Sisters of Virginia.

• Sr. Mary Clarke made her first profession and is now a Scholastic.

• Pat Novak became a Novice in September and will be known as Sister Pat Novak.

• Joanna Burley and Shirley Arce entered the community on January 10, 2011.

• On January 4th Bill Farquhar went to eternal life after serving 30 years as a faithful oblate of Saint Benedict Monastery. May He rest in peace.

CHAPTER 72 THE GOOD ZEAL OF MONASTICS THIS THEN IS THE GOOD ZEAL MEMBERS MUST FOSTER WITH FERVENT LOVE: "THEY SHOULD EACH TRY TO BE THE FIRST TO SHOW RESPECT TO THE OTHER" (ROM. 12:10), SUPPORTING WITH THE GREATEST PATIENCE ONE ANOTHER'S WEAKNESSES OF BODY OR BEHAVIOR AND ERNESTLY COMPETEING IN OBEDIENCE TO ONE ANOTHER.

NO MONASTICS ARE TO PURSUE WHAT THEY JUDGE BETTER FOR THEM-SELVES, BUT INSTEAD, WHAT THEY JUDGE BETTER FOR SOMEONE ELSE. AMONG THEMSELVES THEY SHOW THE PURE LOVE OF SISTERS AND BROTHERS; TO THEIR PRIORESS OR ABBOT, UNFEIGNED AND HUMBLE LOVE.

LET THEM PREFER NOTHING TO CHRIST, AND MAY CHRIST BRING US ALL TOGETHER TO EVERLASTING LIFE.

LET US STRIVE TO HEAR THESE WORDS OF SAINT BENEDICT AND PUT THEM INTO PRACTICE IN THE NEW YEAR.

The National Association of Oblate Directors Conference will be held July1-6, 2011 at St. Meinrad Archabbey in Saint Meinrad, Indiana. If you are inter-ested in going please contact Sr. Charlotte Lee.

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I’VE GOT A STORY By Kathy Frick It was a dark and stormy night when a visitor to England found himself stalled on a country road at the gates of a Benedictine monastery. Getting out of his car, he made his way down the lane and arriving at the door of the monastery, he knocked on the door until the porter of the monastery opened it. The traveler explained his difficulty and asked if he could use the phone to call a tow truck. “Oh course,” said the monk, “but please join us for dinner while you wait.” The traveler gladly agreed and sat down with the monks to have what turned out to be the best fish and chips dinner he had ever tasted. Afterwards, he turned to the porter and asked if it would be appropriate to compliment the cook. The porter directed the traveler to the kitchen. Once there, the traveler spoke to one of the monks working in the kitchen, asking if he was the one responsible for the wonderful fish. “Oh, no,” replied the brother, “I’m the chip monk. Brother Henry is the fish friar.”

Bill Farquhar told the above story and many, many more jokes over his 96 years. To see Bill was to begin to smile because you knew he had another story to tell you. It might not be a particularly good joke, but it would be one told with gusto and with an innate invitation to join Bill in sharing a few moments of joyful companionship.

At his funeral earlier this month, the family and friends of Bill gathered in the Bill Farquhar Sports Centre in Linton Hall School for his funeral mass. At one time it was simply called “the gym” but with a photo of Bill smiling down from over the doorway, you knew that Bill’s presence was still a living part of Linton Hall. He came to Linton Hall and the Sisters as a young man and never really left. Generations of LHS students came under Bill’s eye and into his heart.

Msgr. William Carr called him “a man of towering integrity and common sense.” So much common sense, that Bill bought his own coffin years ago and had it stored on an upper floor of Linton Hall School “for when the time comes.”

We all have our Bill stories. Here’s one: It’s summer of 1968. Two men are sitting on rocks along the run at Linton Hall School. These two summer camp counselors spend their time watching the young ca-dets of the school and talking about life and politics and whatever it is that men talk about on hot summer days. They were known as Bill #1 and Bill #2. Forty-some years later they were together once more. This time Bill #2, no longer a young seminarian but now Monsignor Carr, presides at the funeral mass of Bill #1, our beloved Bill Farquhar.

On the day of his funeral, huge construction paper flowers lined two walls of the gym, on their leaves were brief notes from various students. “Mr. Bill, I miss you soo much. I will all ways remember you in my heart. I hope you meet Virginia [Bill’s deceased wife].” “He would always hug me.” “Mr. Bill, you were the nicest man I had ever met. You probably are going to be the nicest man I ever meet.” “Mr. Bill, I re-member you youst to serve pineapple and applesauce for lunch.” “My favorite memory of Mr. Bill was every time I saw him.”

“None of us is eager to die,” Msgr. Carr, remarked, “Not because our faith is weak, but because there is just so much good in this life.” Bill filled up his life with good and like the folk hero Johnny Appleseed, he scattered the seeds of goodness for future generations wherever he went. And, though we will miss him tre-mendously, some of us can’t help but smile with the thought that Bill now has all of Heaven with which to share his stories. Like one of the leaves on the flowers said, “Enjoy Heaven.”

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“Your way of life should be different than from the world.” Taken from Chapter 4 of the Rule and exemplified by the life of Bill Farquhar

Submitted by Missy Monahan

Bill, our friend and brother has gone home. Bill now is in the arms of his dear Virginia, chatting with his brother “Butch”, and sharing in the beauty all of those whom he loved so deeply that had gone before him. Having lived a life in God’s grace, he walks with the angels, and is, just perhaps, negotiating with St. Peter to build a celestial football field or re-grade the heavenly baseball diamond. I’m sure he will field a team in no time flat. Bill Farquhar was by any standard, the genuine article. He lived life with a servant’s heart and quiet strength. He was witty, serious, determined, funny, kind, non-judgmental, and had the warmest twinkle in his eyes. Bill lived 95 years, and lived well. Just as directed by St. Benedict, Bill lived a “way of life different from the world”. Each and every day he demonstrated his life of faith as a faithful husband and parent, a servant in the community, and a Catholic educator. He demonstrated service to his faith, his family, and to this nation, and did it all with an engaging smile and a warm handshake. Bill had friendships with his fellow service club members, with boys (now men) that he coached or taught, with children currently at the elementary school, with the Sisters and with the Oblates. His nature was to give each of us the best of himself. Because we knew him, we are forever changed. This quiet, soulful man made each and every person Bill encountered richer in this world, and in the understanding of Christ in our lives. Bill had the gift of making you feel like he’d been waiting all day just for you to come in. He’d share a joke and tell a story and was always ready to listen with an understanding ear. The man knew how to “listen with the ear of the heart”. An accident rocked the soul of this community on August 1st of last year. I sat on the swing in the garden, just thinking, while everyone around was engaged in the search for the “new normal”. Bill came upon me and stopped for minute. We talked briefly. My words were full of the tragic loss. Bill said, “I know we are all hurting right now, but imagine how happy Denise is”. Leave it to Bill to say the right thing. Bill too has now gone to live in the light of his Lord and Master. He has in fact, gone from our sight, yet his spirit remains very much with us. When you welcome a stranger, listen to friend, teach a child, enjoy a good, although corny, joke, Bill is with you. When you begin a project that seems unmanageable, Bill will help guide your hands. When you offer your hand and heart to help others, Bill is smiling. Although it will be hard not to have the ‘oldest alter boy in Archdiocese of Arlington’ at mass with us, his love and his lessons in our spirits and hearts continue. Always the teacher and coach, Bill has taught us Benedictine life by example. Now, as we go forward, let us accept the challenge to follow in Bill’s stead, and live lives of love, faith and service, sprinkled liberally with humor and kindness. Hey Bill, because we knew you, we have been changed for good and we know how happy you are now. "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! " 2 Corinthians, 5:17