THE ROTARY CLUB OF FERNDOWN

In this Issue

Derricks Ditherings

Golf Day

Charter Night

Alan Dean

Business Partners

Haskins Collection

Chris Marshall

George Phillips

Amusing Adds

Inner Wheel

Kids Out

Jazz Festival

Dog Show

Special points of interest:

Meets at Cobhams Sports and Social Club

Merley Park Road Wimborne

Telephone: 01202 885773

E-Mail: cobhamsport@btconnect..com

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Service above Self

Iss

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e Derricks Ditherings

As I settle down to write this my last dithering, determined to get it done

before I get the inevitable call from Neville asking me “why he is still

waiting”. I reflect briefly on the events of the last two days.

Wednesday 3rd June was our Golf Day, brilliantly organised by Jim Sand-

ers and his Golf Committee. Although not a golf player and generally be-

mused by the antics of the teams taking part I thoroughly enjoyed the day.

Geoff Richardson and I did our duty at “Hole 5” where a hole-in-one

would have meant the lucky golfer drove home in his (or her) star prize, a

new Honda Civic (sponsored by the Hendy Group). I am pleased to say

that we prevented that from happening on our watch and basked in

warmth and bright sunlight throughout our morning stint.

A magnificent total of £6,000 was raised from the event with three thou-

sand pounds going to Natasha Jones of LEAF (Wimborne) and Katie

Mosses of the Forest Holmes Hospice (Poole).

Again my thanks to Jim, his committee and all our Club members who

assisted on the day.

The following evening I attended a relatively quiet but well attended func-

tion in the Minster organised by a partnership between the Wimborne

Deanery and the Rotary Club of Wimborne. Robert Key, former MP for

Salisbury and now Chairman of the Salisbury Cathedral 2015 Magna

Carta 800th Anniversary Board gave an interesting and very amusing talk

on the history of the Magna Carta and its relevance in today’s society both

at home and Internationally.

Interestingly, the Minster and the Wimborne Club have developed a very

productive relationship recently, one that has been responsible for micro

finance initiatives with the Minster’s Southern Sudan link focused on

Yambio and culminating in the formation of a new Rotary Club in Nzara.

So well done Derek Radley and his fellow Rotarians.

Derricks Ditherings Continued (yet again)

On Wednesday 20th. May the Club celebrated the 39th. Anniversary of its Charter. The Dinner

was very well attended with guests including Debbie Dunford, incoming Assistant Governor and

current President of Wareham Rotary Club; Derek Radley, President of Wimborne; President

Paul Delieu and three members of the Parley Club.

Our guest speaker was Alastair Duncan an authority on the New Forest and its governance and

who was able to tell us a host of things “we didn’t know about the New Forest’. A very enjoyable

presentation and a very enjoyable evening.

It’s been a hectic final month with no sign of a lull in activities, however, space prevents me from

detailing all that has gone on and all that is to come, although I will just mention the International

Committee’s Haskin’s collection. Well done Bob Jones and all the Rotarians who turned out to

help with the collecting.

I look forward to “Kids Out” at Paultons Park, the Fete on the Field, the weekend visit from the

Dubliners and Gerry Clarke’s Jazz Event, Club

Assembly and Handover.

Now I’d like to thank all the Clubs appointed officers for their hard work over the year and, par-

ticularly my Committee Chairmen for their loyal support, Mike Sismey for controlling a very busy

program of events, Neville for his extensive publications (a new career path, perhaps ?). My

thanks also to my Presidential team of IPP Chris Marshall and PE George Phillips plus, of course

a super pair of executives in Treasurer Richard Giles and Secretary Bill Field. My last thank you

goes to every Club member for allowing me to be your President.

At the beginning of my Presidency I stated that my aim was to do ‘no harm’, improve fellowship

and try to ensure that all my colleagues have fun and enjoy their Rotary. I sincerely hope I have

achieved those modest aims. So, looking to the future I‘d like to wish George and his team a very

successful Rotary Year and ask my fellow Rotarians to give George the same terrific support that

you kindly gave me throughout the year.

Many thanks to you all

Enjoy Rotary

President Derrick

Charity Golf Day

Another great day, with over £6,000 raised for our chosen charities LEAF and FOREST HOLME

HOSPICE. All the hard work by the Golf Committee paid dividends with 33 Teams, a record so

far enjoyed a course that was in great shape, weather that was perfect and food and drink that was

plentiful. This ensured that we all had a lovely day, even those of us whose Golf was not up to

Par. Many thanks goes to our Main Sponsor The Hendy Group for the Cars for the Hole in One

Competition, unfortunately nobody won one, many thanks to David Phipps for the Pimms we en-

joyed after the round and many thanks to Thesis Asset Management for refreshments half way

round. With the help of other Sponsors a total of over £800 was raised with the Auction and as

usual Eileen and her team raised a further £750 with the Raffle.

Charity Golf Day

Just a note to thank you and your team for a super day out at

Canford Magna on Wednesday. The ‘Ladies in Red’ and

‘Hiltons Heroes’ had a most enjoyable and fun time. It was

superbly organised and the course and food were excellent,

particularly the Pimms at the 18th. The weather was also a

great bonus. Please pass on our thanks to all concerned and

we look forward to joining you again next year.

Christine and Barrie Vincent Ferndown Golf Club

John & Mik e

On duty at reception Desk Julian, Malcolm & Neil

On Duty at the 5th Hole

Fenners Friends at the 5th Hole

Trying to win a Car Jim with one of the Hole in One Prizes

Bill Field with the Ferndown Flyers

39th

CHARTER NIGHT

PRESIDENT DERRICK

OPENS PROCEEDINGS

Chris Loring our newest member John Smith Founder Member

Reads the Charter Reads the Objects of Rotary

AG Mary toasts the Club Chris Marshall responds

Business Partners

I do not need to emphasise the import role that Business Partners play in supporting our club,

not only financially but in sponsoring events and taking part in some events.

With change of ownership and new personnel in companies we do loose partners from time to

time. This year we have lost two partners, mainly because the main contact within that company

was a Rotarian, but is no longer so. I would urge you to think about businesses, companies or

other organisations that you are in touch with and either approach them direct about becoming a

Partner or give me the details and I will contact them.

Without their ongoing support it will make it more difficult for us to fulfil our programme. It is

also a way of perhaps recruiting new members.

Our current list of partners are listed in our directory.

Thank You. Gordon Lewis

Alan Dean presenting a cheque to the representative from Dorset Blind at the

Wimborne Model Village, which as you know is or was his pet project.

Incoming President’s Letter

12 June 2015

My first letter A

As you know, I am keen this coming year to get closer to the Ferndown town community. This

will be emphasised in the Assembly, along with a desire to recruit some more like-minded mem-

bers to take up the baton from the old guard. Ferndown Rotary is a terrific club, the best around.

Let’s keep it that way.

Well done Bob and team for raising £500 for Shelterbox. These boxes are a lifeline for people hit

by disaster.

The Golf Day was a resounding success again – well done Jim and team. £6000 raised for good

causes, making this our biggest event of the year. Thank you to Norman for his generosity.

Kids’ Out had a beautiful day for the trip, and I look forward to getting the full report. More on

this next time.

At the time of writing, all is set for the Fete on the Field, and only the weather is left to organise.

Anyone want to help with an anti-rain dance? Plenty to amuse our guests from Ireland too – Fete,

Jazz and sunshine.

Here’s to a great summer

George

KIDS OUT

June 10th 2015

Paul and Jean Hunter, Neil and Pat Meldrum, John Flude, Chris Marshall and John Lewis accom-

panied 27 children and and 17 staff of Beaucroft School to another successful Kids out at Poul-

ton's Park on Wednesday. We used a coach, which added to the children's excitement. The weather

was excellent, and the children had a great time trying out various attractions. We had a nice picnic

on the grass with packed lunches provided by District. As usual, the Park was packed out with chil-

dren and Rotarians from around District 1110. This event is very popular, and those who helped

once again said how worthwhile it was.

SEND FOR ROTARY

Once again Ferndown are out shaking the tins for a Disaster

Appeal. This time for the earthquake victims of Nepal. Les,

Helen and Martin doing their stint at Haskins, were we raised

Over £500, well done Bob and his team.

About 6” away

Rotate the Mic as well

When Turning Head

HOW TO KEEP MIC HAPPY

How to Keep Mic Happy

By

Chris Marshall

Dear all. Many members will remember that a few years ago, our member called MIC complained

that members were not using him properly and he was getting very fed-up. He sent everyone some

instructions and diagrams to help learn how to get the best out of him. MIC has again complained

that members have forgotten and that he is not being used properly which annoys Bill intensely, so

with President Derrick's agreement, I attach diagrams showing how once again to become friendly

with MIC. He says that he is not magic - he just needs to be held properly. Remember that he can

only hear you if you hold him within a limited range of angles, as he is uni-directional and not omni

-directional. This is explained in the diagrams.

In addition to the attached diagrams, MIC says that some members hold him so tightly by the throat

that their hand presses the epiglottal ON/OFF switch and causes him to keep cutting out. So would

you if someone had you by the throat!!!! Please hold MIC much lower down below the ON/OFF

switch so that he can again breathe properly, and allow the wondrous tones of your voice to shine

through.

Here's hoping

MIC's friend Chris

Adds seen in a U3A magazine

It just goes to show you are never to old.

FOXY LADY:

Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty,

80's, slim, 5'4' (used to be 5'6'),

Searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion.

Matching white shoes and belt a plus.

----------------------------------------------------

LONG-TERM COMMITMENT:

Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband,

Looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness,

fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.

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SERENITY NOW:

I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and

meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together,

take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

----------------------------------------------------

WINNING SMILE :

Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser

to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.

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BEATLES OR STONES ?

I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on

Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar.

If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen,

let's get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.

----------------------------------------------------

MEMORIES:

I can usually remember Monday through Thursday.

If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday,

let's put our two heads together.

----------------------------------------------------

My favourite ad

MINT CONDITION :

Male, 1936 model, high mileage, good condition, some hair,

many new parts including hip, knee, shoulder, cornea, valves.

Isn't in running condition, but walks OK, just about.

For your information, it’s not me, though it could be.

Neville

Another one From Paul Hunter or was it Trevor Longcroft

Science Class

The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, “Which human body part increases to

ten times its size when stimulated?”

No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, “You should not be asking sixth-graders a

question like that! I’m going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will

then fire you!”

Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, “Which body part increases to 10 times its

size when stimulated?”

Little Mary’s mouth fell open. Then she said to those around her, “Boy, is she going to get in big

trouble!” The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, “Anybody?”

Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, “The body part that increases 10 times

its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye.”

Mrs. Parks said, “Very good, Billy,” then turned to Mary and continued. “As for you, young lady, I

have three things to say

One, you have a dirty mind.

Two, you didn’t read your homework.

And three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed.”

Hi dear friends and jazz lovers!

Just a quickie to let you know about my first Bournemouth Jazz Festival which takes place in ten

days time - Friday19th, Saturday 20th and Sunday 21st June.

We have over 40 jazz bands and singers performing at more than 30 hotels, restaurants, pubs and

bars across the town.

You will find more details on our website and facebook pages via the weblinks below.

We're looking forward to plenty of warm sunshine and smooth jazz by the sea!

So tell all your friends and family and come and join us if you can,

Kind regards,

Gerry Clarke

Festival Director,

Bournemouth Summer Jazz Festival,

Tel: 01202 706662 Mobile: 07710 611123

Email: gerry.clarke@btinternet.com

Website: www.gerryclarke.co.uk

Website: www.bournemouthjazzfestival.co.uk

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/bournemouthjazzfestival

PTO

NEWS FROM INNER WHEEL

The month of May has seemed to have passed very quickly and our activities have certainly focussed on a social side. Business wise we only have had one meeting this month as our dinner meeting date fell on the Spring Bank Holiday and so on this date we were at home, cooking our own dinners!

However, hoping for summer to begin, we arranged a meeting at John Brown’s establishment to do what we do best, chat and drink coffee. It was a lovely morning and we enjoyed sitting outside in the sunshine putting the world to rights. Two weeks later Sue Sismey very kindly invited us to visit her home for a morning of friendship and yes- chat!

Unfortunately we have had to cancel our International Fund Raising lunch, so are hoping to have good success with our stall at the Fete in the Field. The whole day sounds exciting and will bring the name of Rotary and hopefully Inner Wheel to the attention of the local popula-tion. The end of June we have our AGM and will handover the reins to a fresh committee so I will be bequeathing my duties to Mary Tuffrey, who will be an excellent club correspondent.

June looks a busy month for us all so hope my final report will have a little more substance than recently

Sheila Smith

The Object of Rotary

The object of Rotary is to encourage and foster the ideal of service as

a basis of worthy enterprise and, in particular, to encourage and fos-

ter:

1. The development of acquaintance as an opportunity for service.

2. High ethical standards in business and professions, and the

recognition of the worthiness of all useful occupations and the

dignifying of each Rotarian’s occupation as an opportunity to

serve society.

3. The application of the ideal of service in each Rotarian’s

personal, business and community life.

4. The advancement of international understanding, goodwill

and peace through a world fellowship of business and

professional persons united in the ideal of service.

The “Four-Way Test”

First: Is it the truth

Second: Is it fair to all Concerned?

Third: Will it build goodwill and better friend ships

Fourth: Will it be beneficial to all concerned

Business Partners of Ferndown Rotary Club Helping Our Community

Haskins Garden Centres

Henderson’s Opticians

Hendy Group Motor Dealers

Insley & Partners,Solicitors

A.E.Jolliffe & Sons, Funeral Directors

Merlo UK Ltd

Moors Pharmacy

Simon R Puddle, Certified Accountant

Swift Body Repairs

The Practice at Ferndown, Osteopaths

The Roman Group Printers

Wellstead & Wellstead Estate Agents