Salvator Mundi Book Two

8/13/2019 Salvator Mundi Book Two

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BOOK TWO : THE PLAN

(Nov 25th Dec 14th1997)

Tues 25th

Lured back to the roof-space where I find a portrait of Sam beforehis marriage. It is startling, disturbing; the ees a magnetic blue buthea! with something hidden and doleful. The ha!e been e"posedto things the should not ha!e seen. #o anger or bitterness in them,but sour, dark knowledge.

$nd es% $n old attach& case filled with tpewritten manuscript. Itmust be Thessal's research into local histor. (The )hildren of the*ill+ b Thessal oodchild. I take the little case downstairs b thefire and start to read.

THE CHILDREN OF THE HILL

by Thessay !oo"ch#"

$I be#eve #t %as that &o'o&a'#ac Theshe %ho state" #t Theshe the Ta&e*b+e,eye" "a+-hte o. /t the Re"* ast o. the 0#-hty H+'tes eca+se o.co+se the 0eso#th#c H+'te,!athees o. 3eey H# %ee No"#c #' o#-#' I.he eyes ha" bee' bo%'* o+ #ves -ht be "#..ee't 'o% +t he b+e,&a"'ess "#" #tThe #"ea %as 'ot hes o#-#'ay* #t ca&e .o& acoss the sea* .o& 3a&a theo" 3hehe",#'- %hose v#s#o's #t h#s ach#'- hea" %#th th+'"e 3a&a* #'-o. a 0e"#tea'ea' t#be o. Neo#th#c shehe",.a&es* %#th ha%6,#6e s6+sa'" -o%#'-* "a6 eyes* ha" ta#e" h#s -a#'- .oc6s .oeve 'oth%a"sto%a"s these &o#st a'" +'aea#'- #sa'"s* ha",esse" by those co'-+ beh#'"oth aces %ee e8o-a&o+s* (#t %as taboo to &ay %#th#' the t#be)* b+t3a&as #"ea beca&e #es#st#be to Theshe the Ta&e* cat#vato* b+tte,ha#e" e'save* b+e,eye" bee"e o. boo"stoc6 :'" that #s ho% the to+bebe-a' 5;;; yeas a-o :'" %hy %e ae s+..e#'- 'o%

T%o "#..ee't ac#a tyes yo+ see< the .o"abe ho'ey,hea"e" -#a'ts* s6y,eye" h+'tes .o& the Noth a'" the' those "a6 b#",bo'e" #tte .eo%s*%#y,.#'-ee" at#sts* %ho "es#-'e" the ots a'" oo&s a'" a the cave"#'-e'#o+s +8+y o. the 3o+th

Th+s #'- 3a&a* La&b o. the 3o+th* .oate" the #"ea acoss the cha''ec#'-#'- to the bac6s o. shee a'" -oats !oa"e" by h#s stoc6,bee"esyea'#'- .o the e.ect bee"* the #"ea ha" h#& #' #ts teeth He" +' o+t o.-a#'- too #' Nothe' Fa'ce a-e he"s co'- + beh#'" h#& ha"+she" h#& #'to the sea* so he cosse" the "#tch to -ae o' the othe s#"e

:so he" +' o+t o. h+sba'"s .o h#s "a+-htes Ne% boo" he" .#'" the& ,sto'-,#&be" a+"ac#o+s &e' %#th ha# %#" as %heat a'" eyes cea as a6es


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#' %#'te* %ho co+" ta6 %#th a'#&as a'" 6'e% 'o .ea O so he to" the&L#tte he 6'e%* o" 3a&a* that s+ch %as the t#be o. /t the Re"* Last o. the0#-hty H+'tes* the Ch#"e' o. the L#o'They %osh#e" the L#o' that ay o' 3eey H# "#s-+#se" as a .oest No,o'e6'e% %hat a #o' %as* b+t /t sa#" the a'#&a ha" bee' a#ve thee o'ce*

oa#'- the co+'tys#"e as #ts -#tte#'- 6#'- Lo'- a-o the t#be ha" +t a seo' #t to t+' #t #'to a .oest* a'" 'o% #t sa%e" aa#'- o' the h#s .a'6 as-+a"#a' otecto to a "evo+t a'" te#.#e" ca' The L#o' %as the ce'te o.the# #ves the# eyes t+'e" "a#y to #ts ese'ce o' the h#* eyes %#"e %#tha"oat#o'* evee'ce a'" o'-#'- :t "a%' a'" "+s6 ayes %ee s+'-*th##'- a'c#e't %o"s* so'oo+s a'" #'e8#cabe* the sace" se that 6et #t#' #ts ace .o #. #t e.t the h#s#"e they %ee "o'e .o

Te66#'- ho&e that %#'te o. =*=4> C a.te the s+&&e h+'t* ach#'- .o.#es#"e a'" the s&a co&.ots o. heath* the t#be "#" 'ot +'"esta'" the s#-htthat &et the# eyes o' 3eey H# 3&o6e s%a& +%a"s .o& a-e b+#"#'-s

a'" sta'-e %h#te %ooy ceat+es cae" #6e -+s :'" the h# %as 'a6e"The L#o' ha" e.t #t The .oest ha" "#saeae"

Nobo"y &ove" o so6e Noth#'- ha" eae" the& .o th#s &o&e't TheL#o' ha" a%ays -+a"e" the&* 'o% they %ee oha's* v+'eabe a'"ao'e /t &a"e a so+'"* a -+'t* a'" .e H#s bo"y t%#ste"* o'e s#"e o. h#s.ace ce'che" #' sas& as he "a--e" h#&se. ao'- the -o+'" The t#bet+'e" so%y* s#-htessy* to %atch h#& "#e* eyes "ae"* &o+ths a-ae*seechess?e'ch#'- h#s %# a%a6e /ts so' ea#se" that they %ee a "y#'- too* a'"scea'- a #o's oa he a#se" h#s cee&o'#a a8e o. -#ste'#'-* ao,sha.#'t* sava-ey oe" o.. t%o .#'-es* a'" asse" #t* "##'-* to the 'e8t &a'Th#s s#-' eease" the #tes o. &o+'#'- ?o&e' .e sh#e6#'- to the -o+'"*a'" %#th the# coo6#'- 6'#ves* +'sea6abe .#'t ba"es* hac6e" o.. the# ha#*&o+'"e" the# bae hea"s %#th eath* the' %a'"ee" '"essy #' ho%#'-c#ces* -ash#'- the&seves +'t# they stea&e" %#th boo" 3e##'- thesac#.#c#a a8e &e' c+t o.. .#'-es a'" oe'e" the# .esh a'" bo"#es to the s6yto &a6e a -oy &ass o. %o+'"s3oo' the -o+'" %as a%ash* a c#&so' so+* a'" s+ch %as the .e'y that%he' /t* Last o. the 0#-hty H+'tes* th+st h#s e8te'"e" a& a'" co'v+se"bo"y to%a"s the h#* sho+t#'- tho+-h ce'che" teeth #' heess a-e* they

'eve sa% h#s eyes #' sas& .eee .oeve +%a"s

The .+'ea aste" a %ee6 They co+"'t sto +'t# the# a-o'y %as sate"The' ca&e the +#.#cat#o' a'" the .east the bath#'- #' the #ve* the sav#'-o. %o+'"s* the "ess#'- #' 'e% -a&e'ts se%' by the %o&e'* a'" theb+'#'- o. e'"es o. the ast No,o'e so6e o. /t .o he %as "ea" H#s so'%as the# ea"e 'o% :'" so&eho% 3e' &+st 6ee the t#be a#vea..e"* h#s eoe t+'e" to%a"s the h#* aba'"o'e"* %et,.ace"* seechessch#"e'$:'" 'o% I %# te yo+ &y "ea&@ sa#" 3e'The# &oo'#6e .aces s%+'- to%a"s h#&

$The L#o' hath 'ot aba'"o'e" +s* he hath -o'e o' a Ao+'ey@No,o'e &ove"


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$I' &y "ea& a vo#ce sa#"< $RET/RN TO BO/R HO0E3 E NOT :FR:IDHE TH:T H:TH LEFT BO/ ?ILL RET/RN THE LION 3H:LL LIE ?ITHTHE L:0 :ND E!ET : 3ON THEIR CHILDREN 3H:LL INHERIT THEE:RTH :ND :LL ?ILL E ?ELL@$?hat #s a a&b@ as6e" Theshe h#s s#ste

$I "o 'ot 6'o%* b+t %e &+st t+st #' H#& He %# co&e a-a#' ?e &+st beeae" No% -o to yo+ ho&es a'" #ve #' eace acco"#'- to the a%@

:coss the cha''e #' Fa'ce #'- 3a&a %as too o" .o a Ao+'ey :t th#tyhe ha" 'o yea'#'- .o ha" be"s a'" +heavas a'" .+''y .oo"* b+t the #"ea%as o"-e" #' h#s -+t* .ee"#'- o.. h#s e'ta#s* a'" he ha" 'o cho#ce :so heha" .o+ "a+-htes

2CthSept.ear randpaThankou for the lo!el birthda present and for taking me out.=hat a treat that was% It's a relief to be D. Last ear was the worstI'!e had. Sometimes I'!e felt as if I'm not here. I don't e"ist. I'!ebeen replaced b a hole. I'm e!en surprised people can see me.Then I think about add and I know he's with me. It happened theother da plaing lacrosse, with the sun setting o!er the plaingfields the wa it used to on Sell *ill. ust watching the seas andislands spilling about, so gaud and soft and brilliant, with 0)1$#S

of gold sloshing in a sea of pink, ou can feel our soul growing ande"panding inside ou, and ou know e!erthing's alright reall /e!en lacrosse. That #0T*I# can destro it% $nd that add willcome back when the time is right and we'll do whate!er it is weha!e to do without fear, because that's what we're here to do. ThenI'm not lonel or afraid anmore and I know it will be 0G. 8ut I do somiss Sell *ill and I wish I could go home for good. I know randpaoodchild thinks I should do m $ le!els, but reall I'm a bit of adunce ou know. I ha!e other


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all about the ancient #eolithic settlement up there. It's awfullinteresting. The had larger brains than us, did ou know that>T*1:'d ha!e done their $ le!els alright. She thinks the ma ha!ebeen a religious sect, rather like the 1ssenes - the ead Sea Scrolls

ou know>- who were tring to breed a pure race. She ga!e me a

ri!eting book for m birthda about unusual religious practices inprimiti!e societies. It was written b some 0"ford ?rofessor in theBH's I think. It seems that the *awaians (accorded e"treme sanctitand untouchabilit to a )hief born of a brother and sister who werethemsel!es born of a brother and sister. The thought that this

produced a pure being / a od almost.+ $nd umm thinks thema ha!e been up to something similar on Sell *ill. Interestinghuh> ust go now I'!e got prep. o talk to um about me cominghome for good. I'm fed up here and no good at anthing.

Lo!e and big hugs to ou both.ar.

40ST1 FI blame mself for what happened ar, I should ha!e put m footdown. It started as soon as Sam left, the dadreaming, theabsences from school, the (headaches+ and (tired feelings+. Sheneeded a man about the house to keep her up to scratch. $ father.Thessal 3ust ga!e in to her, let her do as she liked. So when shewent to boarding school she had no self-discipline, no idea whatwork meant. It was m fault, I should ha!e done more. 0f courseshe could ha!e taken her $ le!els if she'd wanted / she wasn't

stupid. Then she would ha!e gone to )ollege and got a degree anda proper 3ob and none of this would ha!e happened. It was a wastedlife. She had no self-respect ou see. She talked about going abroadwhen she came home. I asked what she would use for mone andshe said she'd get a 3ob locall and sa!e up. Thessal had workedas a waitress in a coffee bar when she was a student, and shethought ar could do that. 8ut there weren't an coffee bars inSellwick. $nd then 4lora suggested she work in a pub. $ pub% Shewasn't e!en legall of age, she was onl si"teen% 8ut her uncle oeLaud, one of )hrist's brothers, ran a pub in =allbeck and needed awaitress in the dining-room, so he took her on. #e!er said she'd be

helping out in the bar on Saturda nights. $nd of course that'swhere she met him - whoe!er he was% $ ank% 4rom the AS $irforcebase in =allbeck. *e !anished naturall after the damage wasdone. I ne!er thought e!en ar would be that stupid. I reall lo!edthat girl, and I blame mself for what happened. She might ha!ebeen ali!e toda if I'd handled things right. It keeps me awake atnights. =ishing I'd been a bit more forceful with her. ?ut m footdown

S$ J

The thing is I was doing well in $merica. :ou can ou know. The'renot alwas looking o!er their shoulders for precedent the wa we


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y 'od1

)*IST: F:ou're shocked aren't ou girl> Shocked at her letters> )ourse ou

are. I was too. ad. 8arking mad the pair of them, she and hermother. fault of course. I'd made them and I dropped them in it.?recipitated the situation. 8ut I tell ou something ar, there'sworse than madness. There's fear of madness, a!oidance, a life ofnon-participation, non-action, non-li!ing. $nd that's death. ar andThessal were li!ing to the hilt girl, full aware and conscious withall their faculties. Their li!es were charged with 3o and inspiration,the thrilled to e!er nuance of the seasons on Sell *ill. The werein a kind of rapture girl, inspired. I used to en! the energ andthrust of their li!es, the had purpose and direction, a transcendentgoal. The were the stuff of the old )hristian martrs, the were notafraid. ar knew she would not li!e long, she shows that in herletters. $ll I could do was be around when the needed me. Isuper!ised her as best I could on m monthl (business trips+ andused to collect her from the pub in =allbeck when she'd finishedwork on a Saturda night and take her home. (To make sure shedidn't get seduced b the wrong class of person+ I used to sa. $ndshe humoured me. abe she was glad to ha!e me around> brother oe couldn't alwas keep an ee on her, and she was a

prett little thing. She used to stroke m face like she did as a child.4lora said it was because I looked like Sam, but I think she was fond

of me too. I miss her ar. I miss her more than I can sa. Sorr girl,ou'd better lea!e me for a bit. Sorr. Sorr to gi!e wa like this.

S$ EI didn't recognise her ar, I didn't know who she was. I still hadthis picture in m mind of a se!en-ear-old with dream ees, flosshair and a huge giggle.In fact I had planned to sta at The ed Lion but it was booked upfor a conference of heating engineers, so I *$ to sta at The =hite*arte, oe's pub. =hen I got there old eorge the barman didn'trecognise me, and he told me oe was awa on holida so that was

alright. I went up to m room and had a sha!e, and then I realisedwh he didn't know me. Looking at mself closel for the first time, Isaw I was a different person; not 3ust older, but terrible bitter linesaround the mouth, like scars. I looked like a lifer ar, a mandenied humanit and normal intercourse with others, a shrunken,embittered thing to be feared and pitied. Shift ees and a ghastlsmile. #o wonder old eorge didn't recognise me. I put on m gearand chewed some gum and sauntered down to the bar like acowbo from )entral )asting. 8ut I had to wheel round


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I shouldered m wa through the Saturda night throng to the endof the bar and perched on a stool. I had to haul m mind back fromthe hotel kitchen where it was inspecting a row of kni!es / long,gleaming car!ing-kni!es. It kept slipping and slithering along the

passage to see them hanging wetl, ra7or-sharp and shining / and

I'd hea!e it back again, shaking, with trembling hands.There was a mirror on the wall abo!e me, brown and stained withsmoke, (=ills' =hiffs+ it said, and it was placed so the barman couldsee both bars. $nd in it I could see )hrist. 0ff I went again / alongthe passage into the kitchen / I felt m stomach churning. :oushould ne!er fight an obsession ar, it onl makes it worsebecause the inner conflict weakens ou. :ou ha!e to sta with itand let it inhabit ou, and e!entuall it will go awa. 8ut it needscourage; our whole ner!ous sstem screams with it, ou feel ouare being flaed ali!e. So I held on to the bar and took a deepbreath and then suddenl I saw old )hrist fumbling the barmaid%The dirt old bugger was pawing her hand% I saw her lean forwardso he could whisper in her ear, and she was laughing% 8 od old)hrist had a bit on the side% mind was off again / along the

passage into the kitchen / but the girl had mo!ed awa and wascoming round the bar to ser!e me. I had to order something


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grinned at each other, familiar and eas. =e sought each other'shands instincti!el, as children do. =e were a couple, and belongedtogether. =e didn't talk or e"change names, we didn't need to. $ndif ou find that strange, what follows is e!en stranger. 4or as wewalked up the hill I found mself repeating these words6

(There is one thing to be done $nd I must do it if I can. =ide awake beneath the sun $ lo!ing act then all is well. 0ne final act fulfils the plan, $n act of lo!e completes the ccle, breaks the spell.+The girl looked at me, intrigued6 (=hat's that ou're saing>+(I'!e no idea+ I said. (Some kind of nonsense. I'll teach it to ou.+So like children we laughed, and chanted together idioticall6 (There is one thing to be done $nd we must do it if we can. =ide awake beneath the sun $ lo!ing act then all is well. 0ne final act fulfils the plan, $n act of lo!e completes the ccle, breaks the spell.+

$nd, laughing like children, we raced to the top of the hill.

Then we were ling in a kind of bower of scented lea!es and flowersin the 0ak ro!e near the stone and we were naked, and I tell ouar, m heart turned o!er and m breathing stopped for it was mS0AL% lo!ing radiant soul, m shining self, weeping with lo!e,

took me in her arms and held me close, close closer than deathitself. I was bound in a deep web to an act so deep it was startedbefore I was born. $n act performed in full consciousness in broaddalight for which I was born. It was like ding. heart stopped Ibelie!e. Then the humming of the hill was drowned b a low roaringnoise from the forest and we were hanging on for dear life as ahuge wind began to stir and thrash the oak trees in an agon ofwrithing, branches fell around us, the earth trembled and sighed,then shuddered in an ecstas of procreation / and the spell wasbroken.

It was the light that woke me and the feeling of being watched b alarge face. $ full moon was sailing and smiling through the oaktrees. 8ut I was in such a deep drugged sleep I couldn't keep mees open. The ne"t time it was e!en harder to wake, like comingup from the bottom of the sea, as if I had died and been draggedback to life. I was di77 with the dead weight, stri!ing upwards,feeling different, happ, free. The ring of pain had gone from aroundm heart and I was happ at last. =arml gentl happ. Iremembered nothing. I'd had a soft lo!ing dream of some kind andwas released. $nd so I flew back to $merica without e!en needing

to see Thessal or ar.


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Seelspring 4arm. Sundaearest randpa,I'll put this note in our pocket so ou'll find it when ou dri!e backhome tonight. 8 which time IT will ha!e happened. I'm not ill as

ou thought last night randpa, nor (fluish+ as ou thought this

morning. Though it does feel a bit like that. I'!e met someonerandpa darling, that's what's happened. ight under our nose inthe pub last night. *e was in the other bar so ou didn't see him.I'!e ne!er felt like this before and it's not what I e"pected. *e's amiddle-aged $merican from the $ir 8ase with no ob!ious selling

points. 1"cept that I am his. I belong to him. *e is a strange bitterperson who seems damaged in some wa and terribl hurt andangr inside. It tears me apart to look at him, he seems sodestroed and poisoned. 8ut I know I can make him better randpa.I know I can heal him and make him trusting and open. *e needslo!e and I need to gi!e it to him. So we are going for a walk on thehill this afternoon, and I will let things take their course, as things doon the hill. arling randpa I wish I could be seduced b a betterclass of person, but this one is the man for me. Take great care of ourself. I will need ou soon.

:our lo!ing ar

T*1SS$L: She wouldn't tell us who the man was. She didn't know his name,and wouldn't be seeing him again anwa. 4oster hit the roof. *e

was furious. Said it was 3ust what he'd e"pected, that it was startingall o!er again 3ust as he had feared, and that she was to ha!e anabortion.8ut ar of course had left it too late for that, and as she wouldn'tgi!e a description and no-one else had seen him, 4oster couldn'te!en complain to the )amp )ommandant. It ne!er occurred to herto ha!e a termination; she regarded it as the pinnacle of her life'swork to bear this child. I'!e ne!er seen anone so happ. Shewalked like a chalice. 1!erthing she did, e!er thought she had,contributed to the de!elopment of this precious being. I belie!e sheworshipped it. She wasn't emotional or weep; her ees were


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I contacted Sam through his publishers in #ew :ork and he cameback for the funeral. I didn't tell him ar had had a bab. I thoughttoo much was enough. 8ut I was sure it was for Sam to bring himup, not me. I wasn't


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!opyright 4. J. Ward, 2;::, B4AJA(4, 2GHG;, IC$4!*, (AN!4

Salvator Mundi Book Two

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Transcript of Salvator Mundi Book Two