Pilot Tech Talk #1 — 101 Nonviolent Communication by Karola Morawska
Transcript of Pilot Tech Talk #1 — 101 Nonviolent Communication by Karola Morawska
Active aggression
● threatening● emotional terror● shouting● criticizing publicly● lying● quitting● ignoring orders
Passive Aggressive
● being sarcastic● giving minimum of effort● hiding behind law● being unreceptive to change
reality● staying silent● looking the other way● accepting low standards● refusing to participate
Marshall RosenbergAmerican Psychologist
1960 - Nonviolent Communication (NVC) to help resolve conflicts
NVC applies to many areas:
● Relationships, ● Conflict Resolution, ● Parenting and Families, ● Personal Growth, ● Workplace, ● Healthy Body Image, ● Education
Compassion communication
● framework for communicating
● what we feel and what we need
● helps ensuring understanding
Giraffe
Language of emotions and needs
Says ‘no’ when thinks ‘no’
Says ‘I’ and talks about herself/himself
Language of requests
Jackal: “He is so rude.”
Giraffe: “When I said “hello”, he looked in another direction.”
Jackal: “Mr Abraham is not at all able to manage his team.”
Giraffe: “Mr Abraham has explained the new strategy and has been interrupted several times by different people.”
Manager: Could we meet at 5 p.m. to see how to deal with ….
Employee: I planned to leave at 5 p.m. I have been working late for weeks.
Manager (Giraffe): How are you feeling?
Employee (Giraffe): I still feel OK, but I need time for my family and friends too.
Manager (Jackal): We’ve all been working very hard. This is an urgent case and can’t wait.
Employee (Jackal): It’s always urgent. A better schedule would help all of us to be more efficient.
Key Takeaways● Avoid static language (good/bad, normal/not normal, correct/incorrect).
● Don’t compare
● Avoid subtle judgement words like should, ought and must.
● Avoid judgement words which are used to exaggerate, such as always, never,
ever, whenever, often, frequently and seldom.
● Always speak kindly, firmly and clearly.
● Focus on facts
● Switch on the empathy
● Double check “What I hear you saying is…”; “Am I correct in thinking that
your biggest concern is…?”
Key Takeaways
● Double check “What I hear you saying is…”; “Am I correct in thinking that
your biggest concern is…?”
● Set clear expectations around every project and objective
● When giving instruction, ask your colleagues to repeat back what you just said to ensure you were fully understood
● Give praise generously
● Pay close attention to all non-verbal communication
Source.Book:
Marshall Rosenberg “Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life”, 2003
Articles:
● http://www.nonviolentcommunication.com/index.htm 2016.04● http://www.listeningway.com/cctutorial-1.html 2016.04● http://firstround.com/review/power-up-your-team-with-nonviolent-communication-principles/ 2016.04● http://jewishcurrents.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/non-violent-communication.gif 2016.04● https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/passive-aggressive-diaries/201306/why-passive-aggression-thrives-in-the-workplace 2016.04 ● https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/violent-communication-work-am-i-my-peers-bartlomiej-zawadka 2016.04● https://www.americanexpress.com/us/small-business/openforum/articles/8-ways-deal-passive-aggressive-employees/ 2016.04● http://dziecisawazne.pl/zyrafa-szakal-co-znacza-symbole-porozumienia-bez-przemocy-2/ 2016.04● https://www.cnvc.org/addressing-workplace-conflict-three-steps 2016.04