Alex 1 Chediak 1 1 1 Parent , Child 1 Discussion 1 Guide 1 ... · Alex 1Chediak 1 1 1Parent ,Child...
5
Alex Chediak ParentȬChild Discussion Guide Thriving at College Copyright © 2012, Alex Chediak www.alexchediak.com Talking to our children about going to college can be one of the trickiest things we’re called to do as parents. We care about their future. We want things to go well for them. But if we’re honest, it’s also a time of concern: Will my child’s Christian faith be strong enough to withstand the tests of college—the party scene, the atheistic professors seeking to brainwash freshmen? Will they manage their time well, or be overwhelmed with the amount of freedom that awaits them? Will they make solid, lifeȬ long friends, or be lonely and get in with the wrong crowd? Will they be happy, successful, and persevering in their studies, or will they wander aimlessly from one major to the next? We often wonder if their choices are going to match what our choices would be for them. We may have nurtured hopes and dreams for them since they were young. “I just know Michael is going to follow his father’s footsteps and become a doctor. He’s always been so bright.” Or, “I’m sure Amanda will want to go to college somewhere near home. We’ve always been so close.” And some of us are wondering if our high school children are going to ever start thinking about college! Thriving at College is a book you can read with your teenager toward the end of high school. It can serve as a springboard for discussions as you seek to raise your son or daughter to graduate collegeȬready. The book contains lots of discussion starter questions at the end of every chapter, which I hope are helpful for you. This brief file is an additional resource for you—I’ve put together a few conversation starters to “break the ice” as you talk with your collegeȬbound child about transitioning to young adulthood and preparing to thrive at college. Introduction 1. Do you want to go to college when you graduate high school? Why or why not? 2. What are some ways you’re taking on more responsibility as you get older? Do you find it freeing? Challenging? Stressful?
Transcript of Alex 1 Chediak 1 1 1 Parent , Child 1 Discussion 1 Guide 1 ... · Alex 1Chediak 1 1 1Parent ,Child...
AlexȱChediakȱ ȱȱParentȬChildȱDiscussionȱGuideȱ ThrivingȱatȱCollegeȱ
Copyrightȱ©ȱ2012,ȱAlexȱChediak www.alexchediak.com
Talkingȱtoȱourȱchildrenȱaboutȱgoingȱtoȱcollegeȱcanȱbeȱoneȱofȱtheȱtrickiestȱthingsȱwe’reȱcalledȱtoȱdoȱasȱparents.ȱWeȱcareȱaboutȱtheirȱfuture.ȱWeȱwantȱthingsȱtoȱgoȱwellȱforȱthem.ȱButȱifȱwe’reȱhonest,ȱit’sȱalsoȱaȱtimeȱofȱconcern:ȱWillȱmyȱchild’sȱChristianȱfaithȱbeȱstrongȱenoughȱtoȱwithstandȱtheȱtestsȱofȱcollege—theȱpartyȱscene,ȱtheȱatheisticȱprofessorsȱseekingȱtoȱbrainwashȱfreshmen?ȱWillȱtheyȱmanageȱtheirȱtimeȱwell,ȱorȱbeȱoverwhelmedȱwithȱtheȱamountȱofȱfreedomȱthatȱawaitsȱthem?ȱȱWillȱtheyȱmakeȱsolid,ȱlifeȬlongȱfriends,ȱorȱbeȱlonelyȱandȱgetȱinȱwithȱtheȱwrongȱcrowd?ȱȱWillȱtheyȱbeȱhappy,ȱsuccessful,ȱandȱperseveringȱinȱtheirȱstudies,ȱorȱwillȱtheyȱwanderȱaimlesslyȱfromȱoneȱmajorȱtoȱtheȱnext?ȱȱȱȱWeȱoftenȱwonderȱifȱtheirȱchoicesȱareȱgoingȱtoȱmatchȱwhatȱourȱchoicesȱwouldȱbeȱforȱthem.ȱWeȱmayȱhaveȱnurturedȱhopesȱandȱdreamsȱforȱthemȱ
sinceȱtheyȱwereȱyoung.ȱȱ“IȱjustȱknowȱMichaelȱisȱgoingȱtoȱfollowȱhisȱfather’sȱfootstepsȱandȱbecomeȱaȱdoctor.ȱHe’sȱalwaysȱbeenȱsoȱbright.”ȱOr,ȱ“I’mȱsureȱAmandaȱwillȱwantȱtoȱgoȱtoȱcollegeȱsomewhereȱnearȱhome.ȱWe’veȱalwaysȱbeenȱsoȱclose.”ȱȱȱAndȱsomeȱofȱusȱareȱwonderingȱifȱourȱhighȱschoolȱchildrenȱareȱgoingȱtoȱeverȱstartȱthinkingȱaboutȱcollege!ȱȱȱThrivingȱatȱCollegeȱisȱaȱbookȱyouȱcanȱreadȱwithȱyourȱteenagerȱtowardȱtheȱendȱofȱhighȱschool.ȱItȱcanȱserveȱasȱaȱspringboardȱforȱdiscussionsȱasȱyouȱseekȱtoȱraiseȱyourȱsonȱorȱdaughterȱtoȱgraduateȱcollegeȬready.ȱȱTheȱbookȱcontainsȱlotsȱofȱdiscussionȱstarterȱquestionsȱatȱtheȱendȱofȱeveryȱchapter,ȱwhichȱIȱhopeȱareȱhelpfulȱforȱyou.ȱȱThisȱbriefȱfileȱisȱanȱadditionalȱresourceȱforȱyou—I’veȱputȱtogetherȱaȱfewȱconversationȱstartersȱtoȱ“breakȱtheȱice”ȱasȱyouȱtalkȱwithȱyourȱcollegeȬboundȱchildȱaboutȱtransitioningȱtoȱyoungȱadulthoodȱandȱpreparingȱtoȱthriveȱatȱcollege.ȱȱIntroductionȱȱ1.ȱDoȱyouȱwantȱtoȱgoȱtoȱcollegeȱwhenȱyouȱgraduateȱhighȱschool?ȱȱWhyȱorȱwhyȱnot?ȱȱ2.ȱWhatȱareȱsomeȱwaysȱyou’reȱtakingȱonȱmoreȱresponsibilityȱasȱyouȱgetȱolder?ȱȱDoȱyouȱfindȱitȱfreeing?ȱChallenging?ȱStressful?ȱȱ
AlexȱChediakȱ ȱȱParentȬChildȱDiscussionȱGuideȱ ThrivingȱatȱCollegeȱ
Copyrightȱ©ȱ2012,ȱAlexȱChediak www.alexchediak.com
Chapterȱ1:ȱDon’tȱChuckȱYourȱFaithȱ–ȱGrowȱCloserȱToȱGodȱȱ1.ȱWhereȱareȱyouȱat,ȱpersonally,ȱwithȱregardȱtoȱChristianity?ȱȱBeȱhonest.ȱAreȱyouȱboredȱwithȱit?ȱDoȱyouȱhaveȱanyȱdoubtsȱaboutȱitȱbeingȱtrue?ȱȱAreȱthereȱanyȱquestionsȱyou’veȱbeenȱdyingȱtoȱask,ȱbutȱdon’tȱthinkȱit’sȱOK,ȱorȱthatȱanyoneȱwillȱhaveȱanȱanswer?ȱȱȱ2.ȱMostȱpeopleȱatȱaȱsecularȱcampusȱwon’tȱshareȱourȱvalues,ȱagreeȱwithȱourȱmorals,ȱorȱbelieveȱtheȱsameȱthingsȱweȱdoȱaboutȱJesus.ȱHowȱdoȱyouȱthinkȱthatȱwillȱfeel?ȱȱȱ3.ȱWhatȱdoȱyouȱdoȱnowȱtoȱmaintainȱyourȱrelationshipȱwithȱJesusȱChrist?ȱDoȱyouȱthinkȱyou’llȱbeȱableȱtoȱkeepȱdoingȱthoseȱthingsȱonȱcampus?ȱȱȱ4.ȱDoȱyouȱhaveȱanyȱfriendsȱwhoȱareȱlivingȱaȱdoubleȱlife—livingȱoneȱwayȱinȱfrontȱofȱtheirȱparentsȱandȱchurchȱfriends,ȱandȱanotherȱwayȱwhenȱnobodyȱfromȱchurchȱisȱlooking?ȱȱȱChapterȱ2:ȱDon’tȱTreatȱCollegeȱAsȱifȱitȱWereȱHighȱSchoolȱȱȱ1.ȱDoȱyouȱmakeȱaȱhabitȱofȱstartingȱyourȱhomeworkȱrightȱaway,ȱorȱdoȱyouȱprocrastinate?ȱȱȱȱȱ2.ȱIsȱrecreationȱ/ȱfunȱtimeȱimportant?ȱWhatȱdoȱyouȱlikeȱtoȱdoȱtoȱtakeȱaȱbreak?ȱȱȱ3.ȱDoȱyouȱjustȱendȱupȱdoingȱthingsȱ“byȱaccident,”ȱorȱareȱyouȱbeingȱintentionalȱinȱchoosingȱwhatȱyouȱdo?ȱȱȱȱ4.ȱDoȱanyȱofȱtheȱthingsȱyouȱenjoyȱbecomeȱaddictiveȱorȱdistracting?ȱDoȱtheyȱmakeȱitȱhardȱforȱyouȱtoȱshiftȱbackȱtoȱschoolworkȱorȱchores?ȱȱȱȱ5.ȱHowȱdoȱyouȱprioritizeȱyourȱwork?ȱIsȱitȱhardȱtoȱdoȱtheȱthingsȱyouȱdon’tȱfeelȱlikeȱdoing,ȱevenȱwhenȱthey’reȱimportant?ȱHowȱdoȱyouȱdecideȱwhatȱtoȱdoȱfirst?ȱȱ6.ȱIt’sȱ11pm.ȱYou’reȱlivingȱinȱaȱdormȱwithȱ100ȱotherȱkidsȱyourȱsameȱage,ȱgoingȱthroughȱallȱtheȱsameȱthingsȱyouȱare.ȱOnȱtheȱ1stȱfloor,ȱsomeȱguysȱareȱsettingȱupȱaȱcrazyȱobstacleȱcourseȱandȱtalkingȱaboutȱorderingȱpizza.ȱOnȱtheȱ2ndȱfloor,ȱthereȱareȱseveralȱgroupsȱhavingȱconversations…someȱhilarious,ȱsomeȱdeepȱandȱprofound.ȱOnȱtheȱ3rdȱfloor,ȱtwoȱguysȱareȱplayingȱsomeȱawesomeȱguitarȱandȱaȱbunchȱofȱtheȱgirlsȱareȱwatchingȱthem.ȱYou’reȱnotȱremotelyȱtiredȱandȱnoȱoneȱisȱgoingȱtoȱtakeȱattendanceȱatȱyourȱ9amȱclass.ȱYouȱdoȱhaveȱtoȱreadȱ150ȱpagesȱforȱaȱLitȱclassȱbyȱ4pmȱtomorrowȱandȱhaveȱaȱproblemȱsetȱdueȱbyȱnoon.ȱWhatȱdoȱyouȱdo?ȱȱȱ
AlexȱChediakȱ ȱȱParentȬChildȱDiscussionȱGuideȱ ThrivingȱatȱCollegeȱ
Copyrightȱ©ȱ2012,ȱAlexȱChediak www.alexchediak.com
Chapterȱ3:ȱBeȱIntentionalȱ–ȱFindȱGreatȱFriendsȱandȱMentorsȱȱ1.ȱAsȱyouȱconsiderȱgoingȱoffȱtoȱcollege,ȱwhatȱqualitiesȱareȱyouȱlookingȱforȱinȱfriends?ȱȱȱ2.ȱWhatȱdoȱyouȱthinkȱaboutȱfindingȱaȱchurchȱnearȱtheȱcollege?ȱDoȱyouȱknowȱhowȱtoȱchooseȱone?ȱWhatȱareȱsomeȱthingsȱyouȱcouldȱlookȱfor?ȱȱȱȱSuggestedȱactivity:ȱIfȱyourȱchildȱdoesn’tȱalreadyȱhaveȱaȱspecificȱchurchȱinȱmind,ȱgoȱonlineȱtogetherȱandȱidentifyȱatȱleastȱthreeȱchurchesȱtoȱvisit.ȱAgreeȱthatȱyou’llȱtalkȱaboutȱthemȱafterwards.ȱȱ3.ȱWhatȱdoȱyouȱplanȱtoȱdoȱthatȱfirstȱmonthȱorȱtwoȱatȱcollegeȱtoȱestablishȱfriendshipsȱonȱcampus?ȱȱȱȱȱSuggestedȱactivity:ȱIfȱyouȱchildȱisȱconsideringȱaȱsecularȱcampus,ȱgoȱonlineȱtogetherȱandȱidentifyȱseveralȱChristianȱorganizationsȱthatȱhe/sheȱthinksȱareȱworthȱvisiting.ȱȱȱȱChapterȱ4:ȱDistortingȱDatingȱandȱRomanceȱȱ1.ȱȱHaveȱyouȱseenȱanyȱfriendsȱgetȱinȱtroubleȱbyȱgoingȱtooȱfar,ȱtooȱfastȱinȱguyȬgirlȱrelationships?ȱȱȱȱ2.ȱDoȱyouȱthinkȱsomeȱpeopleȱtryȱtoȱpursueȱintimacyȱapartȱfromȱcommitment?ȱWhy?ȱWhatȱisȱyourȱplanȱinȱthisȱarea?ȱȱȱ3.ȱDoȱyouȱthinkȱit’sȱrelevantȱtoȱthinkȱaboutȱwhatȱyou’reȱlookingȱforȱinȱaȱspouse,ȱbeforeȱconsideringȱaȱparticularȱ“girlfriend”ȱorȱ“boyfriend”?ȱȱȱ4.ȱDoȱyouȱthinkȱthereȱisȱonlyȱoneȱ“right”ȱpersonȱoutȱthereȱforȱyou?ȱȱȱȱChapterȱ5:ȱȱRefusingȱtoȱGrowȱUpȱȱ1.ȱHowȱwillȱgoingȱawayȱtoȱcollegeȱchangeȱyourȱrelationshipȱwithȱus?ȱȱ2.ȱWhatȱisȱtheȱdifferenceȱbetweenȱaskingȱyourȱparentsȱforȱhelpȱandȱaskingȱthemȱtoȱdoȱthingsȱforȱyou?ȱȱȱȱȱ3.ȱȱHowȱdoȱyouȱplanȱtoȱtakeȱresponsibilityȱforȱyourȱlifeȱinȱcollege,ȱinsteadȱofȱdependingȱonȱusȱforȱeverything?ȱHowȱwillȱyouȱmakeȱbigȱdecisions,ȱonesȱthatȱhaveȱnoȱclearȱrightȱorȱwrongȱanswer?ȱȱ
AlexȱChediakȱ ȱȱParentȬChildȱDiscussionȱGuideȱ ThrivingȱatȱCollegeȱ
Copyrightȱ©ȱ2012,ȱAlexȱChediak www.alexchediak.com
ȱSuggestedȱactivity:ȱCreateȱaȱbudgetȱtogetherȱforȱtheȱfirstȱsemester.ȱWhatȱwillȱtheyȱneedȱtoȱcover?ȱWhatȱwillȱyou,ȱasȱparents,ȱcover?ȱȱWillȱtheyȱbeȱexpectedȱtoȱwork,ȱreceiveȱanȱallowance,ȱorȱsaveȱmoneyȱfromȱaȱsummerȱjob?ȱȱChapterȱ8:ȱȱWiselyȱSelectingȱaȱMajorȱȱ1.ȱȱWhatȱ(academic)ȱsubjectsȱdoȱyouȱespeciallyȱlike?ȱWhatȱareȱyourȱpassions?ȱȱȱȱ2.ȱȱWhatȱkindsȱofȱprojects/activitiesȱhaveȱyouȱpursuedȱjustȱbecauseȱyouȱwantedȱto?ȱȱ3.ȱȱInȱwhatȱareasȱhaveȱyouȱseenȱsuccess?ȱȱWhatȱkindsȱofȱsuccess?ȱȱ(Grades,ȱcontests,ȱrecognitionȱbyȱteachers,ȱetc.)ȱȱ4.ȱȱWhatȱcouldȱyouȱseeȱyourselfȱdoing,ȱcareerȬwise?ȱȱWhatȱifȱmoneyȱwereȱnoȱobject?ȱȱChapterȱ9:ȱȱRecognizeȱthatȱGrowthȱRequiresȱChallengeȱȱ1.ȱȱDoȱyouȱhaveȱaȱstrategyȱforȱtakingȱnotesȱduringȱclass?ȱȱHowȱdoȱyouȱplanȱtoȱstudyȱoutsideȱofȱclass?ȱȱȱȱȱ2.ȱWhatȱdoȱyouȱthinkȱofȱtheȱideaȱthatȱpartȱofȱgettingȱanȱeducationȱisȱaboutȱbecomingȱaȱcertainȱkindȱofȱperson?ȱȱOrȱdoȱyouȱthinkȱeveryȱclassȱyouȱtakeȱneedsȱtoȱgiveȱyouȱspecificȱjobȬrelatedȱskills?ȱȱȱȱ3.ȱHaveȱyouȱeverȱstruggledȱwithȱjealousyȱinȱcomparingȱyourȱacademicȱskills/accomplishmentsȱwithȱothers?ȱȱȱȱ4.ȱWhat’sȱtheȱdifferenceȱbetweenȱworkingȱhardȱandȱworkingȱsmart?ȱȱȱȱ5.ȱIfȱyouȱstruggleȱacademicallyȱinȱcollege,ȱwhereȱcanȱyouȱgoȱforȱhelp?ȱȱȱ
AlexȱChediakȱ(Ph.D.,ȱU.C.ȱBerkeley)ȱisȱaȱProfessorȱofȱEngineeringȱandȱPhysicsȱatȱCaliforniaȱBaptistȱUniversity.ȱHisȱbook,ȱThrivingȱatȱCollegeȱ(TyndaleȱHouse,ȱ2011),ȱhitȱtheȱChristianȱBookseller’sȱAssociationȱbestȬsellerȱlistȱinȱMayȱ2011.ȱȱItȱwasȱrecognizedȱbyȱYouthWorkerȱJournalȱasȱoneȱofȱtheȱbestȱresourcesȱofȱ2011.ȱȱHeȱregularlyȱcontributesȱtoȱChristianityȱTodayȱandȱFocusȱonȱtheȱFamily’sȱBoundlessȱwebzine.ȱȱFindȱoutȱmoreȱatȱwww.alexchediak.com.ȱȱȱȱȱȱȱ
AlexȱChediakȱ ȱȱParentȬChildȱDiscussionȱGuideȱ ThrivingȱatȱCollegeȱ
Copyrightȱ©ȱ2012,ȱAlexȱChediak www.alexchediak.com ȱ
![Alex. Darida Gh[1][1][1][1]. Zamfir En.Version](https://static.fdocuments.in/doc/165x107/554c9fffb4c905b80b8b5394/alex-darida-gh1111-zamfir-enversion.jpg)
