1

Writing Style to Avoid Confusion for the Reader

Avoid weak verbs Use Active Voice Use the dependent clause Avoid prepositional phrases Avoid excess wordiness and less precise

words Avoid fancy or less precise words Limit paragraph, word, and sentence length

2

Avoid Weak Verbs

Weak verbs convey practically no sense of action do, make, perform, have forms of the verb to be

Avoid nouns that are really verbs in disguise Substitute verbs that create a clear sense of action

At the core of every good sentence is a strong, precise verb.

3

Verbs Disguised as Nouns

Make a recommendation Recommend

Formulate an argument

Arrive at a conclusion

Perform an analysis

Argue

Conclude

Analyze

4

Active vs Passive Voice

Frisky ate my homework. (4)

My homework was eaten by Frisky. (6)

Frisky = Doer / subject of sentence

ate = Active Verb

homework = Object of action

homework = Object as subject

by Frisky = Doer object of preposition

was eaten = passive verb

5

Active or Passive Voice?

The metropolis has been scorched by the dragon’s fiery breath. (10)

The technicians demanded longer coffee breaks. (6)

The explosion was caused by a kerosene lamp. (8)

The dragon’s fiery breath scorched the metropolis. (7)

The technicians demanded longer coffee breaks.

A kerosene lamp caused the explosion. (6)

6

When Passive Works …

Use active voice unless you have a good reason for choosing passive

Emphasize the receiver of the action

The solution was heated to the boiling point and then reduced in volume by 50 percent.

7

When Passive Works …

Use active voice unless you have a good reason for choosing passive

Passive Voice: A number of problems are indicated by these results.

 Active Voice: The results indicate a number of problems.

Further analysis showed / suggested / yielded ….

8

The Dependent Clause

Amplifies or qualifies the statement in the main part of the sentence Highlights the importance Suppresses the incidental Links ideas together Shows how ideas are related

Start with a subordinating conjunction or relative pronoun

9

The Dependent Clause 

So Where Before

Although Than Though

After Since When

Because As Whereas

If Unless until

While

Who What Which

That Why How (many)

Subordinating conjunctions

Relative Pronouns

10

The Dependent Clause

The project was not completed on time, because the machine parts were stolen.

If at first you don't succeed, try something else.

A helium nucleus has two protons, whereas hydrogen has only one.

Energy supplies will dwindle, unless we conserve.

11

The Dependent Clause

Where are the parts that I ordered?

The uranium nucleus, which contains 92 protons, is unstable.

Most people don't know who their senators are.

What the aerospace industry needs now is more friends in Congress.

12

Avoid Prepositional Phrases

Less informative alternative to dependent clause

Treat all ideas as grammatically equal No discrimination No emphasis among qualifying details

Reader left to interpret what you are trying to say

13

Avoid Prepositional Phrases

in progress on the floor beside the garage between the cities of data-processing equipment to a Martian by walking on hot coals

14

Avoid Prepositional Phrases

In their specifications for engine parts, titanium is often requested by engineers because of its resistance to the effects of high temperatures. (6)

Because titanium resists high temperatures, engineers often request it in their engine part specifications.

15

Avoid Excess Wordiness

As a matter of fact I might add that It should be pointed out that the presence of

at this point in time

has the ability to

in light of the fact that

in the event that

the question as to whether

Unnecessary Phrases…..

Use only necessary words …..

the course of the fact that It is significant that….

now, then

can

because

if

whether

16

Editing Approach

Circle the prepositions Determine the doer Determine the action

Use dependent clauses instead of prepositional phrases, when possible

Use active voice instead of passive Use strong verbs Eliminate excess / less precise words

What to look for…..

What to do …..