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Interpersonal communication

Dr Joanna Crossman

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Assignment 22500 Words; May 20 2008

Describe and explain the factors that influence interpersonal communication in the workplace.

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US research findings (Windsor et al. cited in Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor

2007, p379)

Involved 400 HR ManagersInterpersonal skills most important skill for

job successIdeal skills for managers included;

listening, working well 1-1 and in groupsConsidered more important than GPA,

type of degree or technical skills.

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Interpersonal Communication

The way “people react and respond to others in thought, feeling and action” (Cook 1971, p.14).

Obviously people can initiate interpersonal communication too!

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The Communication Climate

“The social tone of a relationship. The way people feel about each

other (Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor 2007, p302)

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According to Dwyer (2005) the communication climate

requires;

empathyself disclosureinterpersonal effectivenesswillingness to listen

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How do you know when you have a positive

communication climate at work?

Jot down some of the ways you can tell if people are communicating

well interpersonally.

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Positive communication climateDwyer (2005, p100)

people interact confidently and courteously relationships are built on openness, goodwill,

honesty and trust people are willing to speak to others people listen carefully, ask questions and

offer feedback information and ideas are conveyed

accurately

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In short, a positive communication climate is

one where people feel valued (Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor 2007, p302).

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How do you know if there is a negative communication

climate?

What kinds of things suggest to you that people are not communicating

well interpersonally in the workplace?

Write down your ideas.

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Negative communication climate

(Dwyer 2005, p100).

When communicating is difficult it is hard for people to obtain and provide

information and to take action people feel uncomfortable and unwilling to

interact people are unwilling to ask questions, or offer

ideas and feedback accuracy of communication declines

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Confirming and disconfirming

communication (Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor 2007, p303).

Confirming communication conveys valuing.

Disconfirming communication signals a lack of caring. Even not speaking to people creates a negative communication climate that leads them to leave their jobs.

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Confirming and disconfirming

communication (Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor 2007, p303-304).

Recognition (making contact)

Acknowledgment (listening, paying attention, asking questions

Endorsement (agreeing, encouraging)

Argumentativeness Complaining Aggression (Name

calling, sarcasm, yelling).

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Empathy

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Empathy(Dwyer 2005, p17)

Empathy is the ability to understand and respond to how another person feels

It enhances the communication climate The ability to put yourself in another’s

place (Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor 2007, p318).

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Which of the following comments are empathetic?

a) Yes, I can understand how Ann’s behaviour has upset you.

b) What did you do to cause Anne to behave like that?!!!!

c) Yeah, things often don’t work out the way you want.

d) You must feel disappointed after all your work that the project was rejected.

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Self-disclosure(Johnson cited in De Janasz et al. 2006,

p.32) “…the process of letting others know

what you think, feel and want. It is revealing to another how you are reacting to a situation and sharing experiences that are relevant to that situation”

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Self-disclosure (Dwyer 2005, p103):

requires open communication leads to increased self-awareness involves sharing of ideas and feelings provides feedback

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Self-disclosure must…. contain personal information be communicated verbally be sent to another person

(Cozby cited in Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor 2007, p275).

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Self-disclosure…..

Is about feelings more than facts. There are also different degrees of

self-disclosure (Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor 2007, p276).

How much SD depends on the communication climate

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Discuss the possible benefits and the fears

people might have about disclosing themselves to

others

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Brings relief psychologically to share feelings

People who know each other well work together better

Reduces stressYou are more

aware of other perspectives

Private information may be passed on to people without your knowledge

Some people see it as a weakness.

Janasz et al. (2006, p.33-35)

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Activity

Work with the person next to you. Discuss your workplaces/university and the extent to which you believe a positive communication climate exists.

Think about empathy, self disclosure, interpersonal effectiveness and a willingness to listen.

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Inference theory (Cook 1971, p.32; Dwyer 2005, p101)

A process used in forming impressions and making judgments about people

Judgments based on an unconscious set of ideas reflecting our attitudes, beliefs and values

Identifying and associating certain characteristics that can lead to stereotyping, eg. by gender or race, occurs and judgments are made.

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Inference theory

Resembles syllogistic reasoning. For example;

All red-haired men are aggressiveThis man has red hair (Identification)Therefore he is aggressive

(Association)(See Cook 1971, p.32)

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Activity

In pairs or threes write your own example of an inference theory. Try to use one that is authentic in your culture. Be prepared to share your ideas.

Eg; people with close set eyes.

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Emotions

Intense debate about how emotions can be defined and classified with some coming to the view that they are so multifaceted that it is an impossible task (Crossman 2007).

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Emotion is about “taking things personally” (Shields 2002,

p5).

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Emotional awareness

People who are emotionally aware are often better at interpersonal communication.

Emotional awareness means you know how you feel and can express it in words (Hein 2003 cited Dwyer 2005, p. 104)

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Emotional intelligence involves (Mayer 1999 cited in Dwyer 2005,

p. 104 ) … Being able to perceive emotion integrating emotion into thought understanding & expressing

emotion managing emotion appropriately in

different contexts

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Edward de Bono and the hats theories….

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Objectivity

Caution Emotions

Creative ideas

Control

Yellow hat = positive outcomes

Edward De BonoSix Thinking Hats

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Red hat thinking

Vermeer. Girl with the red hat

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“If emotions and feelings are not permitted as inputs in the thinking process, they will lurk in the background and affect all the thinking in a hidden way. Emotions, feelings, hunches and intuitions are strong and real” (De Bono 1999).

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1.jpg

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Activity

Discuss the importance of emotional intelligence in relation to traditional notions of intelligence.

Can you think of people who are traditionally intelligent but emotionally ‘poor’ – how does it affect their lives do you think?

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Self-concept “Self-concept refers to our own

understanding of ourselves” (Tyler, Kossen & Ryan 2005, p. 199).

Relatively stable perception people hold about themselves.

It is influenced by; Past experience Relationships Communication skills(Dwyer 2002,p51).

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Self Concept continued….

The Johari window named after the first names of its creators Joseph Luft and Harry Ingram.

The window provides a model for understanding self concept

(Tyler, Kossen & Ryan 2005, p. 199).

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Johari Window

Known to others

Not known to others

Known to self

Not known to self

Public Arena Blind Spot

Hidden AreaUnknown

Area

Source: Dwyer . 2002, p.54

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Positive self-concepts(Dwyer 2005)

A person with a positive self-concept is:

self-directed able to communicate effectively accepting of themselves effective in different interpersonal

situations

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Self-esteem (Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor 2007, p56-

57) Extent to which we approve and accpet

ourselves High self esteem effects communication

because people who feel good about themselves have positive expectations about how they communicate

When they communicate well their self-esteem is further reinforced

Low self esteem works in a similar way.

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Machiavelli (Janasz et al. 2006, p.6)

Attempting to lead without self knowledge results in disaster.

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Those with self-awareness can….

understand how others see themdevelop a self-improvement programset appropriate life and career goalsdevelop better relationships with othersmanage others effectivelywork more productively

(Janasz et al. 2006, p.6)

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Role Theory

In one day we may fulfil a variety of roles such as friend, student, brother, sister, colleague, employee and may move in and out of these roles easily (Tyler, Kossen & Ryan 2005, p. 199).

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Do we change who we are?

Role theoryRole repertoire: the number of roles constantly and competently performed in a variety of contexts (Dwyer 2005, p. 107)

Role theory: socially approved identities or ‘faces’ accepted as appropriate to a particular role (Dwyer 2005, p. 107)

‘Face’: is emotionally invested, can be lost, maintained or enhanced (Brown & Levinson 1987, p.

61)

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Discuss with your partnerhow you may seem a little different depending upon the context and your role.Be prepared to share your thoughts with the group.

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Role theory has been criticised as being simplistic because relationships can be more complex and spontaneous (Tyler, Kossen & Ryan 2005, p. 199).

For example we may regard individuals as both friends and colleagues. Some married people work together.

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Communication styles (Dwyer

2005, p.107)

DominantDramaticContentiousAnimatedImpression-

leaving

RelaxedAttentiveOpenFriendly

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Decide which communication style best describes you and explain to the person sitting next to you why you think

this is so.

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Effective Communication

Based on; a person’s willingness to communicate

empathy with anotherthe skill to adjust their communication in

ways appropriate to other individuals and situations

The recognition of the needs and rights of others. (Dwyer 2005, p. 112)

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Interpersonal effectiveness

OpennessEmpathySupportivenessPositivenessEquality

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The guy in the red shirt needsAssertiveness training

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Assertive behaviour (Dwyer 2005, p113)

acknowledges the rights of others and one’s ownIs open and relaxedinvolves high self esteemallows for expression of opinions or disagreeingis not aggressive (involving conflict and

domination)not submissive (low self-esteem; unable to

promote own needs and interests)

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Effective communication (Dwyer 2005, p144)…

‘I’ statementsFeelings + behaviours + effects + alternativesEg. “I feel annoyed (feelings) when you don’t

let me know you will be late (behaviours) because I am unable to reschedule my timetable (effects). I would like you to call me and let me know you’ll be late” (alternatives).

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ActivityThink of an unacceptable situation

involving another person that you are experiencing in your work or personal life.

Write down a ‘Feelings + behaviours + effects + alternatives’ statement that you could use to achieve more effective communication

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Role Play

Act out a role play of an unacceptable situation. One person plays the part of someone who is perceived as behaving unacceptably and the other must use the ‘feelings + behaviours + effects + alternatives’

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Effective Communication involves giving feedback…

Feedback should be constructive not destructive (Dwyer 2005 118)

It should occur in a timely fashionIt is best to focus criticism on one topic

(Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor 2007, p382)

Address the issue whilst maintaining a positive relationship (Adler, Rosenfeld & Proctor 2007, p383)

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Activity

Discuss what have you found out about interpersonal communication in this lecture?

Be prepared to present the main points to the wider group.

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Summary of topic A positive communication climate is created through

for example, empathy, self-disclosure and interpersonal effectiveness.

Emotional intelligence has an important role to play in building interpersonal relationships

Self concept, self image and self esteem play a part in interpersonal relationships

Assertive communication with ‘I’ statements is helpful. The roles we play may affect our interpersonal

relationships Providing effective feedback is vital. Effective networking needs to be informed by theory

on interpersonal effectiveness.

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References

Adler, R Rosenfenfeld, L & Proctor, R 2007, Interplay, 10th edn., Oxford University Press, New York.

Burleson, B, Liu, M & Mortenson, S 2006, ‘Chinese evaluation of emotional skills, goals, and behaviours. An assessment of gender-related similarities and differences', Communication Research, vol.33, no.1, pp.38-63.

Cook, M 1971, Interpersonal Perception, Penguin science of behaviour, Harmondsworth, UK.

Crossman, J. 2007. The role of relationships and emotions in student perceptions of learning and assessment. Higher Education and Research Development, 26 (3).

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References continued…..

De Janasz, S, Wood, G Gottschalk, L, Dowd & K Schneider, B 2006, Interpersonal skills in organisations, McGraw- Hill Irwin, Boston.Dwyer, J.2005, Communication in Business. Strategies

and skills, Prentice Hall, Frenchs Forest, NSW.Shields, S. (2002). Speaking from the heart. Gender

and the social meaning of emotion. Cambridge, UK: Cambridge University Press.

Tyler, S, Kossen C & Ryan, C 2005, Communication. A foundation course, 2nd edn, Pearson Prentice Hall, Frenchs Forest, NSW.