Post on 10-Mar-2016
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Sports Centre plans thrown into doubt DAVID ROBERTS
P r o p o s a l s f o r Impe r i a l ' s n e w Spor ts
C e n t r e f a c e d a t o u g h r e c e p t i o n
f r o m l o c a l res idents a n d c o u n c i l -
lors w h e n they w e r e put f o r w a r d
fo r p l a n n i n g a p p r o v a l last m o n t h .
W e l l in excess of a h u n d r e d
l o c a l r e s i d e n t s h a v e s u b m i t t e d
wr i t t en o b j e c t i o n s , s t a t i n g
i n c r e a s e d n o i s e a n d t ra f f i c a n d the
loss o f l igh t as t h e i r p r i n c i p l e
o b j e c t i o n s . N o n e t h e l e s s , t h e i r
d e c i s i o n is still f a r f r o m ce r t a i n
e i ther way - the p l a n n i n g c o m m i t -
tee has a g r e e d to c o m e o n a site
visit t o ge t a n i d e a of the pro jec t
fo r t h e m s e l v e s , b e f o r e r e tu rn ing to
m a k e a f ina l d e c i s i o n o n O c t o b e r
1 4 t h .
W h i l s t the m i x e d s u p p o r t w h i c h
the p r o p o s a l s f a c e d w a s no t ent i re-
Spot the space where you can fit a county standard sports hall... Photo: Ed
ly e n c o u r a g i n g , it hasn ' t d e n t e d
the o p t i m i s m of F rank M u r r a y , IC ' s
Spor t s a n d Le isure M a n a g e r , w h o
has seen a c o n s t a n t s t r e a m of p r o -
p o s a l s i d e a s a n d ske tches fo r the
new C e n t r e drift a c r o s s his d e s k
o v e r the last f ew years , b e f o r e the
cur rent p l a n was d e c i d e d u p o n .
S p e a k i n g to Fe l i x , M r M u r r a y
a d m i t t e d to b e i n g "qu i e t l y o p t i -
m i s t i c " . I C ' s D i r e c t o r o f Estates,
Ian C a l d w e l l , w a s in s i m i l a r m i n d ,
p o i n t i n g ou t that "In C e n t r a l L o n -
d o n i t 's i m p o s s i b l e t o b u i l d a n y -
th ing w i thou t r e c e i v i n g a s tack of
o b j e c t i o n s " .
If p e r m i s s i o n is g r a n t e d , w o r k
wi l l start ea r l y next s u m m e r o n the
y e a r l o n g b u i l d i n g w o r k w h i c h
w o u l d see a seven c o u r t spor ts ha l i
( s u i t a b l e f o r b a s k e t b a l l , b a d -
m i n t o n , f i ve-a-s ide f o o t b a l l , go l f ,
a r c h e r y etc) a n 8 m by 1 8 m c l i m b -
i n g w a l l , a d e d i c a t e d a e r o b i c s
g y m , i m p r o v e d c h a n g i n g r o o m s
a n d w e i g h t s t r a i n i n g fac i l i t i es a n d
a ser ies o f s e l f - c o n t a i n e d r e s i d e n -
t ia l f lats e r e c t e d a b o v e the cur ren t
Spo r t s C e n t r e s i te .
W i t h a d e c i s i o n e x p e c t e d w i t h-
in the next f o r tn igh t , w e ' l l k e e p you
p o s t e d wi th a l l n e w d e v e l o p m e n t s .
£36 000 loss to spell end for Summer Balls? DAVID ROBERTS
M a s s i v e l o s s e s o n l a s t J u n e ' s
S u m m e r B a l l s c o u l d resu l t in t h e
a x e f a l l i n g o n these t r a d i t i o n a l
e n d o f y e a r p a r t i e s .
A t o t a l o f £ 3 6 0 0 0 w a s los t
o n the t w o b a l l s , w i th the " o f f i -
c i a l " I C U Ba l l n o t c h i n g u p a £ 1 4
0 0 0 d e b t , a n d t h e M e d S c h o o l
U n i o n Ba l l c o l l a p s i n g £ 2 2 0 0 0
i n t o t h e r e d . L o s s e s o n b o t h
events w e r e d u e to t i cke t s a l e s
f a i l i n g t o r e a c h e x p e c t a t i o n s , w i th
the I C U B a l l , h e l d at A l e x a n d r a
P a l a c e o n the last d a y o f t e r m ,
s e l l i n g o n l y 1 4 0 0 of a p r o j e c t e d
1 9 0 0 t i c ke t s .
A s b o t h b a l l s -had fu l l I C U
b a c k i n g , h a v i n g b e e n o r g a n i s e d
by U n i o n g r o u p s , I C U wi l l n o w be
f a c e d w i th c o v e r i n g t hese losses
f r o m i t ' s o w n b a l a n c e s h e e t .
W h i l s t the M e d S c h o o l l osses c a n
b e r e c o v e r e d f r o m the r e m a i n s of
t h e o l d M e d i c a l S c h o o l U n i o n
Rese r ves , f i n d i n g su f f i c i en t c a s h to
p a y o f f the d e b t o n the o t h e r b a l l
m a y be m o r e p r o b l e m a t i c . I ndee d
the U n i o n m a y be f o r c e d to d i p
i n t o i t ' s s t r a t e g i c r ese rves (bui l t u p
by b a r prof i t s a n d d e s i g n e d to pay
f o r m a j o r c a p i t a l p r o j e c t s ) in
o r d e r t o c o v e r the l o s s . Th i s in
turn w i l l c r e a t e fu r the r p r o b l e m s
f o r t h o s e s e e k i n g to g u a r a n t e e the
n e c e s s a r y f u n d i n g f o r next s u m -
m e r ' s e x p a n s i o n into the b a s e -
men t s o f Beit Q u a d w h i c h the
m o n e y h a d b e e n e a r m a r k e d for.
O n e a l t e r n a t i v e s o u r c e o f
i n c o m e has c o m e to l igh t , h o w e v -
er, a s it is b e l i e v e d tha t c e r t a i n
s e n i o r m e m b e r s o f C o l l e g e staff
h a v e o f f e r e d t o use IC to wr i te-of f
the l o s s e s , in o r d e r to e n s u r e tha t
the S u m m e r Ba l l c o n t i n u e s . H o w -
ever, o n e p r o v i s o h a s a l l e g e d l y
b e e n set - tha t t he r e is o n l y o n e
b a l l . In o t h e r w o r d s , t he r e s h o u l d
b e n o m o r e s e p a r a t e I C S M Ba l l s .
R u m o u r h a s it t h a t a s a resu l t o f
th is c a v e a t t h e I C U P r e s i d e n t ,
N a t a s h a N e w t o n , h a s r e j e c t e d
t h e o f f e r o u t o f h a n d . M s N e w t o n
is a m e d i c a l s t u d e n t .
F o r n o w , h o w e v e r , the future
o f b o t h S u m m e r B a l l s w o u l d s e e m
to be in s o m e d o u b t , w i th the
m o s t l i ke ly o u t c o m e a s m a l l e r
s c a l e e v e n t o r g a n i s e d by I C U ' s
E v e n t s & M a r k e t i n g M a n a g e r .
W e ' l l u p d a t e y o u a s s o o n a s there
a r e a n y d e v e l o p m e n t s .
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University quality contol "farce" Big Issue
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Sports & Sociefies
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rat ion Society md the Student
: Pugwash G r o u p .
DAVID ROBERTS
Bat t le l ines a r e b e i n g d r a w n
between the two biggest players in
the H i g h e r Educ t ion wor ld over the
fo rmat for the new Q u a l i t y Assur-
a n c e system, due to be in t roduced
na t i onw ide later this year.
In the m i d d l e sits the Q u a l i t y
A s s u r a n c e A g e n c y ( Q A A ) , the body
respons ib le for assess ing a n d report-
ing o n the qual ity of t each ing in al l
HE universit ies a n d co l l eges , wh ich
is in the process of d r aw ing up p lans
to re-invent itself. To on e s ide sits the
C o m m i t t e e of V i c e C h a n c e l l o r s a n d
Pr inciples ( C V C P ) , the owners of the
Q A A , w h o a re d e m a n d i n g that al l
judgements o n t each ing qual i ty are
m a d e verbally. O n the other s ide ,
the H i g h e r E d u c a t i o n F u n d i n g
C o u n c i l (HEFCE) insists that n u m e r i -
ca l scores shou ld be h a n d e d out to
a l l ow easy c o m p r o m i s e s to be m a d e
In Brief SABBATICAL CURSE LIFTED
Ear l y in the s u m m e r it l o o k e d a s if
t h e s o - c a l l e d ' I C U S a b b a t i c a l
C u r s e ' (wh i ch h a s s e e n e l e c t e d
s a b b a t i c a l s f o r c e d to r e s i gn d u e
to f a i l i n g e x a m s in e a c h of the
last t h r ee years ) w a s g o i n g to hit
a g a i n , a s M e d S c h o o l P r e s i den t
B e c k y E n g l a n d f a i l e d he r 2 n d M B
p a p e r s . Th is n o r m a l l y l e a d s to
b e i n g d e e m e d to be in i n su f f i c i en t
a c a d e m i c s t a n d a r d - w h i c h
m e a n s y o u c a n n o t p u r s u e the
s a b b a t i c a l . H o w e v e r , she w a s f o r -
t u n a t e l y a l l o w e d t o res i t the r e l e-
v a n t e x a m s a n d , h a v i n g p a s s e d
th is t i m e a r o u n d , t o o k up he r pos t
in m i d S e p t e m b e r .
S H O W ME THE M O N E Y
M o r e m o n e y s e e m s to b e h e a d i n g
t o w a r d s I m p e r i a l c o u r t e s y o f the
g o v e r n m e n t s new S c i e n c e Ente r-
p r i s e C h a l l e n g e . I m p e r i a l h a s
b e e n s e l e c t e d a s o n e o f e i g h t
N a t i o n a l C e n t r e s o f E x c e l l e n c e
a n d h a s b e e n a w a r d e d £ 2 m i l l i o n
to h e l p " p r o m o t e the i m p o r t a n c e
of e n t e r p r i s e in s c i e n c e a n d t e c h -
n o l o g y " . E x p e r t s w i l l h e l p t o
g u i d e r e s e a r c h e r s f r o m t a k i n g
t h e i r i d e a s f r o m c o n c e p t i o n to the
m a r k e t p l a c e a n d a t t e m p t to fos-
between different institutions. They
are be l ieved t be b a c k e d by sen io r
f igures in the g o v e r n m e n t w h o a re
keen to see s t a n d a r d i s e d , m e d i a
fr iendly, University League Tables
const ructed by the Q A A .
Forced into a c o m p r o m i s e , the
Q A A ' s latest p l an is to split assess-
ment up into three distinct a r eas
( teaching & l ea rn ing , student p r o -
gress ion a n d l ea rn i ng resources )
e a c h of wh i ch w o u l d be b a s e d
a r o u n d a four point sca le whe re
e a c h level is desc r i bed in words
rather than numbers . Unsurpr is ing ly ,
the C V C P a re less than impressed
with this c o m p r o m i s e , desc r ib ing it
as " n u m e r i c a l ma rk i n g by the b a c k
d o o r " . The fact that the Q A A p lan to
mark other a reas , such as cu r r i cu-
lum des ign a n d content us ing a s i m -
ple pass o r fai l system has hardly
he lped to br idge the g a p .
The s e c o n d ba t t l eg round is the
ter a m o r e e n t r e p r e n e u r i a l a t t i -
t u d e to e n g i n e e r i n g .
BYELECT ION L O O M S
A s e l e c t i o n of B ig n a m e s a r e
g a t h e r i n g to f igh t it o u t f o r the
c o n s e r v a t i v e n o m i n a t i o n f o r the
K e n s i n g t o n a n d C h e l s e a bye l e c-
t i o n . The b y e l e c t i o n c o m e s a b o u t
as a resul t o f the d e a t h o f A l a n
C l a r k d u r i n g the s u m m e r , a n d
must t ake p l a c e b e f o r e C h r i s t -
m a s . A t p r e s e n t f o r m e r D e f e n c e
Sec r e t a r y M i c h a e l Po r t i l l o is the
h o t f a v o u r i t e t o b e o f f e r e d the
n o m i n a t i o n f o r the s e c o n d sa fes t
C o n s e r v a t i v e sea t in the coun t r y .
ANOTHER O N E GETS AWAY
S o u t h a m p t o n U n i v e r s i t y h a s
b e c o m e the latest m a j o r H i g h e r
E d u c a t i o n ins t i tu t ion to qu i t t he
N a t i o n a l U n i o n of S t u d e n t s . T h e y
jo in U M I S T a n d I m p e r i a l as the
o n l y m a j o r i ns t i tu t ions in B r i t a i n
not to be a f f i l i a t e d to the N U S -
a l t h o u g h the vas t m a j o r i t y o f
S c o t t i s h i n s t i t u t i o n s a n d s o m e
O x b r i d g e C o l l e g e s h a v e a l s o
c h o s e n not to jo in the n a t i o n a l
s t u d e n t b o d y . H o w e v e r , a s
S o u t h a m p t o n s tuden ts u n i o n left
t h r o u g h a d e b a t e a n d vo te at a
so-ca l l ed " l ight t o u c h " a p p r o a c h ,
whe reby c o l l e g e s a n d universities
with a g o o d track record in Q A A
aud i t s w o u l d u n d e r g o s impl ist ic
" s c r e e n i n g " to see if any further
a c t i on were necessary. The C V C P
fea r that b ig n a m e universit ies w o u l d
a u t o m a t i c a l l y ge t a n easy r i de ,
despi te the fact that s o m e d o not
have n ou t s t and ing assessment h is-
tory - O x f o r d a n d C a m b r i d g e , for
e x a m p l e , have s imply refused to let
the Q A A aud i t t hem in the past,
whilst s o m e universit ies with very
g o o d t e a c h i n g r e co rds have per-
f o r m e d poor l y in the assessment due
to their a d m i n systems.
W i t h the new system supposed l y
set to c o m e o n line next yea r (new
de pa r t m e n t a l b e n c h m a r k gu ide l ines
are d u e fo r re lease in M a r c h ) a year
of petty s q u a b b l i n g , p o w e r b rok ing
a n d pa infu l nego t i a t i on seems cer-
ta in .
u n i o n m e e t i n g , t he N U S h a v e
d e n o u n c e d th is a s u n d e m o c r a t i c
a n d h a v e f o r c e d S o u t h a m p t o n to
h a v e a r e f e r e n d u m in N o v e m b e r
t o d e c i d e w h e t h e r o r n o t to to
c o n f i r m d i s a f f i l i a t i o n .
STUDENTS STAY AT H O M E
T h e n u m b e r o f n e w s t u d e n t s
c h o o s i n g t o l i ve a t h o m e h a s
r i sen d r a m a t i c a l l y , f r o m 2 0 . 8 %
l as t y e a r t o 2 2 . 6 % th i s y e a r
a c c o r d i n g t o U C A S . B i za r re l y , the
f i g u r e r ises to a r o u n d 3 6 % in
S c o t l a n d b u t f a l l s t o 1 7 % in
W a l e s
CALL FOR PAY INQUIRY
FOR LECTURERS
L e c t u r e r s a t t a c k e d the g o v e r n -
m e n t at the T U C C o n f e r e n c e t w o
w e e k s a g o f o r t h e i r f a i l u r e to
a d d r e s s t h e p r o b l e m s o f l o w p a y
a n d p o o r c o n d i t i o n s o n a n a t i o n -
a l s c a l e ( g o v e r n m e n t p o l i c y c u r -
rent ly s ta tes t ha t p a y a n d c o n d i -
t i on s a r e u p to the i n d i v i d u a l
i n s t i t u t i o n ) . T h e A s s o c i a t i o n o f
U n i v e r s i t y T e a c h e r s (AUT) c a l l e d
f o r a n a t i o n a l i n q u i r y o n p a y d i s -
c r i m i n a t i o n to a s s e s s the extent of
t h e p r o b l e m a c r o s s t h e e n t i r e
p u b l i c sec to r .
G O L D M A N S A C H S I N T E R N A T I O N A L
es
r
, 7 1999 e
t
, e t ^ Ne t ,
EC4A
en
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Q|
e e For as l o n g as a n y o n e c a n r e m e m -
ber, Imper ia l C o l l e g e has b e e n try-
ing to const ruct a new Sports C e n -
tre. S ince the fa r ce wh i ch l ed to the
present bu i l d i n g ' s current f o rm (lack
of p l a n n i n g pe rm iss ion for Ha l l s to
be built o n t o p on ly b e c a m e a p p a r -
ent after work o n the Sports C e n t r e
h a d begun ) it has b e e n o b v i o u s that
a larger, i m p r o v e d faci l i ty w o u l d be
necessary to fully a c c o m m o d a t e the
needs of the C o l l e g e commun i t y .
For starters, runn ing a series of
sma l l e r i n d o o r fac i l i t ies - the s w i m -
m i n g p o o l , S o u t h s i d e G y m , the
We ights r o o m , the U n i o n G y m etc
is fa r less eff icient t han cent ra l i s ing
into o n e new venue (a s i tuat ion
a n a l o g o u s to the spor ts g r o u n d
issue). C o n s e q u e n t l y , m a j o r cos t
sav ings a n d serv ice i m p r o v e m e n t s
c o u l d b e m a d e by b u i l d i n g a new
unitary sports centre .
S e c o n d l y , t he r e s i m p l y isn ' t
e n o u g h s p a c e at present . A l t h o u g h
most c lubs a n d soc ie t ies c a n just
a b o u t squeeze into the exist ing slots,
there ' s very little potent ia l for a
" Spor t for A l l " e thos in wh i ch any
r a n d o m g r o u p of students have a
decen t c h a n c e of f ind ing the f ac i l i -
t ies t hey ' r e after. M o r e o v e r , the
necessity for s o m e c lubs to travel a
c o n s i d e r a b l e d i s tance just to f ind a
su i tab le faci l i ty is hard ly g o i n g to d o
w o n d e r s fo r pa r t i c ipa t ion levels.
O K , that 's why it needs to be
built - the next ques t ion is where . . .
S i nce the m i d e ight ies , a c o n -
stant s t ream of p r o p o s a l s , des igns
a n d p l a n n i n g a p p l i c a t i o n s have
f l oa ted a r o u n d the C o l l e g e a n d the
l o c a l commun i t y , with a variety of
sites, styles, costs a n d faci l i t ies o n
offer at o n e t ime o r ano the r - until
f inal ly it seems that we have s o m e -
th ing o n the tab le wh i ch has the
po ten t i a l to m o v e into p rac t i c e .
Indeed , o n e of the C o l l e g e ' s mos t
power fu l a rgumen t s is that they have
- qui te genera l l y - tried to fit the
C e n t r e into every other o p e n (or not
so open ) s p a c e o n c a m p u s . This is,
qu i te literally, the last op t i on a v a i l -
ab le . . .
The last m a j o r p l a n n i n g at tempt
c a m e b a c k in 1 9 9 6 . H a v i n g h a d
p roposa l s for a c o m b i n e d sports
centre a n d hal ls d e v e l o p m e n t o n
t o p of the tennis cour ts next t o Lin-
stead turned d o w n , C o l l e g e rea l i sed
that the l o ca l residents h a d h a d
e n o u g h of IC 's t r ade m ar k conc re t e
b l o ck bu i l d i ng motif , a n d w o u l d thus
only g ive pe rmiss ion to s o m e t h i n g
" in c h a r a c t e r " . Consequen t l y , the
des igners took a large lateral step
a n d p r o p o s e d s ink ing the ent i re
centre - c o m p l e t e with a mass ive
nine court ha l l - unde r Princes G a r -
dens , poss ib ly l ink ing toge ther the
exist ing s w i m m i n g p o o l with the t en-
nis courts (and beyond ) . Indeed it
was be l i eved that the "Secre t G a r -
d e n " (Princes G a t e G a r d e n s , beh i n d
W e e k s Hal l ) w a s initial ly b o u g h t to
further this project . A l t h o u g h such a
s cheme might n o w s e e m very far
etched, i t ' s worth r e m e m b e r i n g that
it was d r a w n up d u r i n g the in fancy
of lottery f u n d i n g , w h e n h u g e pi les
of m o n e y were th rown at suspect
projects . C o n s e q u e n t l y , it was to
poss ib l e to f und such a mass ive
project .
This p l a n went to commi t t ee late
in A u t u m n 1 9 9 6 a n d , f a c e d with
a r o u n d 2 7 0 ob jec t i ons f r om loca l
res idents - w h o c i ted u n a c c e p t a b l e
d i s rup t ion d u r i n g cons t ruc t ion a n d
inc reased traffic w h e n the C e n t r e re-
o p e n e d - it was flatly re jec ted. . .
A n d three years a n d a few o the r
(less fully deve l oped ) p l ans d o w n
the l ine, here we a r e , awa i t i ng the
o u t c o m e of the latest r o u n d of p l a n -
n i n g d i s cuss i ons .
So wha t ' s the d o w n s i d e ? W e l l ,
b u i l d i n g a new H a l l c o u l d m e a n the
loss of S o u t h s i d e G y m (the
t imesca le w o u l d fit in nice ly with the
S o u t h s i d e r e d e v e l o p m e n t a n d
f i n a n c i n g c o u l d , concep tua l l y , be
f u n d e d by the sa le of o n e of IC 's
three sports g r o u n d s - a l t h o u g h the
sen io r staff i nvo l ved a l l deny a direct
l ink. Anyway , that 's a d i scuss ion for
a n o t h e r day.. .
M I T C H E L L M A D I S O N G R O U P
Strategic Management Consulting
ft- . • * v 1-.,.. J ? '/
Are you:
- interested in strategy consulting?
- interested in e-commerce?
- interested in both?
To find out more about the exciting opportunities created by the recent merger of
Mitchell Madison Group and USWeb/CKS, please come along to our campus presentation.
Thursday, October 14th at 6.30pm
in Civil Engineering Lecture Theatre 201
www.mmgnet.com
We look forward to seeing you there!
Mitchell Madison G r o u p - a U S W e b / C K S company w w w . u 8 w e b c k s . c o i n
a e 7pm, Monday October 11th, dBs
Multimedia presentations from IC Radio, stoic,
Felix, Phoenix (Imperial's arts magazine), the
Alternative Prospectus and ICU Web. Chairs and
editors will also be on hand to offer help and
advice. Plus... FREE BEER
x
F ANATOMY Where Are We?
O n c e a g a i n Felix has m o v e d h o u s e , this t ime into a pa i r of s a l u b r i o u s
p o r t a c a b i n s s i tuated in the c a m p u s ' Latin Q u a r t e r (otherwise k n o w n as
just off the r o a d be tween Sher f ie ld a n d Pr ince C o n s o r t R o a d , nest led
be tween Physics a n d the l iqu id N i t r o g e n tank) . W e ' l l be l iv ing here fo r
the next twelve m o n t h s , until the shiny new U n i o n M e d i a C e n t r e is f i n-
i shed in the ba s e m e n t s of Beit. Unt i l t h en , you c a n expec t to f ind the e d i -
tor (that' l l be me) a n d a eve r-chang ing co l l e c t i o n of assor ted s u b - e d i -
tors , wr i ters , g e n e r a l h a n g e r s - o n a n d squaters g a t h e r e d a r o u n d the
p lays ta t ion a n d / o r c o m p u t e r s ( depend in g o n the day of the week) at a l l
hours of the day a n d night. D r o p by if you ' r e interested in wr i t ing a n d
I'll o f fe r you a co f f ee , a seat o n the so fa a n d s o m e very suspec t a d v i c e
a b o u t wha t you might l ike to d o .
Independence
U n l i k e s o m e student n e w s p a p e r s , Felix benef i ts f r om g u a r a n t e e d i n d e -
p e n d e n c e f r o m both C o l l e g e a n d the U n i o n (despite the fact that a l a rge
par t of o u r i n c o m e c o m e s stra ight f r o m ICU ) . C o n s e q u e n t l y , this a l l ow s
reporters a n d co lumn i s t s to g ive hones t , u n b i a s e d v iews a n d e x p l a n a -
t ions of a l l the b ig issues - we p r o m o t e the U n i o n whe reve r p o s s i b l e , but
the interests of the students a lways have to c o m e first. S imi lar ly , the e d i -
tor isn't direct ly r e spons ib l e to the U n i o n Pres ident (or i n d e e d any of the
sabba t i ca l s ) so Felix has the abi l i ty to s tand a l o n e as a n i n d e p e n d e n t
entity.
The Editor
Lucki ly for m e (and hope fu l l y for the qua l i t y of the f in i shed p roduc t ) , Felix
is run by a full t ime s a b b a t i c a l editor. F rom n o w until the end of next July
I'm b e i n g p a i d by the U n i o n - in other w o r d s you - just to run Felix. S o ,
if y o u don ' t th ink that I'm m a k i n g a par t i cu lar l y g o o d job of it, o r if you
d i s a g r e e with s o m e t h i n g that I've pr inted p l ease get in t o u c h - I n e e d
f e e d b a c k to d o this j ob p rope r l y . I c a n be r e a c h e d at
e d i t o r . f e l i x @ i c . a c . u k , o n ( 0 2 0 7 59 ) 4 8 0 7 2 o r a l ternat ive ly I'm usua l l y
in the p o r t a c a b i n s f r om 9 - 6 M o n d a y to Friday. If you ' r e u n h a p p y with
my reply then the next s tage is to c o m p l a i n to the M e d i a G r o u p C h a i r ,
C h r i s J a c k s o n ( c a j 7 @ i c . a c . u k ) w h o s h o u l d be a b l e to f ind a s o l u t i o n .
WHAT IS FELIX
Yes , o f c o u r s e Fe l ix is the n e w s p a -
p e r f o r s t u den t s at I m p e r i a l , bu t
m o r e i m p o r t a n t l y i t 's t he n e w s p a -
p e r wr i t t en by the s t u d e n t s of
I m p e r i a l t o o . It c a n o n l y f u n c t i o n
w i th a b r o a d b a s e o f w r i t e r s ,
d e s i g n e r s , p h o t o g r a p h e r s ,
r e v i e w e r s , s u b - e d i t o r s a n d
repo r t e r s d r a w n f r o m a c r o s s the
C o l l e g e w h o p o o l t h e i r c o l l e c t i v e
t a l en t s a n d k n o w l e d g e t o p r o d u c e
a p u b l i c a t i o n t o be p r o u d of.
NEWS
T h i n k a b o u t it, if s o m e t h i n g ' s n o t
r e p o r t e d ' i n Fe l ix , w h e r e e l s e a r e
s tuden t s g o i n g to f i n d o u t w h a t ' s
g o i n g o n o n c a m p u s ? C o n s e -
quen t l y , it r e q u i r e s the fu l l a t t e n -
t i on of a c r a c k t e a m of r e p o r t e r s
a n d p h o t o g r a p h e r s to k e e p y o u
up t o d a t e w i th w h a t ' s g o i n g o n in
the U n i o n , in the h i g h e r e c h e l o n s
of C o l l e g e , a n d in the l o c a l a r e a .
W i l l i n g v o l u n t e e r s t o g o u n d e r -
c o v e r a n d i n f i l t r a t e t h e i n n e r
w o r k i n g s of S h e r f i e l d a r e d e s p e r -
ate ly s o u g h t .
SPORT
Th is y e a r ' s spo r t s s e c t i o n s h o u l d
be b i g g e r a n d bet te r t h a n ever .
W e ' r e l o o k i n g f o r a d e d i c a t e d
t e a m o f s p o r t s r e p o r t e r s a n d
p h o t g r a p h e r s t o e n j o y the e x p e n s -
es p a i d h igh- l i f e o f H a r l i n g t o n ,
C o b h a m a n d T e d d i n g t o n , c o v e r -
ing a s m a n y o f I C ' s m a j o r ( an d
mino r ) f ix tures o v e r the c o m i n g
s e a s o n as is h u m a n l y p o s s i b l e .
I n te res ted? C o m e to the o f f i c e
a n d a s k for G u s .
REVIEWS
E n c o m p a s s i n g e v e r y s t y l e o f
m u s i c , f i l m , t h e a t r e , b o o k s , v i d e o ,
g a m e s (on a l l f o r m a t s ) , a r t , m u s e -
u m s , g i g s a n d c l u b b i n g , t h e r e
m u s t be s o m e t h i n g f o r y o u . Wr i t e
a rev i ew , ge t s o m e f ree stuff - it 's
a s i m p l e e q u a t i o n . In p a r t i c u l a r ,
g a m e s r e v i e w e r s a r e cu r r en t l y in
p a r t i c u l a r l y s h o r t s u p p l y , s o d r o p
by o r e m a i l f e l i x @ i c . a c . u k if
y o u ' r e i n t e r e s t e d .
. _ j
FEATURES
A n e s o t e r i c c o n c e p t at bes t , f e a -
t u r e s e n c o m p a s s e s just a b o u t
a n y t h i n g y o u c a r e to n a m e . B e e n
o n a n a m a z i n g h o l i d a y tha t y o u
w a n t to tel l the w o r l d a b o u t ?
T h e n w hy no t wr i te a b o u t it. G o t a
b u r n i n g i s sue y o u w a n t to ge t off
y o u r ches t a n d t u r n i n to a C o l l e g e
w i d e d e b a t e ? T h e n I k n o w a g o o d
p l a c e to start . S e r i o u s l y , if t h e r e ' s
s o m e t h i n g y o u w a n t t o wr i t e
a b o u t t h e n just d r o p by a n d h a v e
a c h a t - ' n o ' isn ' t in the s t u d e n t
e d i t o r ' s v o c a b u l a r y .
S C I E N C E
D e s p i t e the f a c t tha t this is o n e of
te w o r l d ' s l e a d i n g S c i e n c e , T e c h -
n o l o g y a n d M e d i c i n e Ins t i tu t ions ,
r e c r u i t i n g a t e a m of s c i e n c e wr i t-
ers a l w a y s s e e m s t o b e s u r p r i s i n g -
ly p r o b l e m a t i c . N o n e t h e l e s s ,
e x p e c t to see r e g u l a r u p d a t e s o n
every m a j o r m o v e m e n t s , p a r t i c u -
lar l y t h o s e c e n t r e d a r o u n d Impe r-
i a l , i n t e r s p e r s e d w i th the o d d
p a n i c k e d re-wri te o f last w e e k ' s
N e w Sc i en t i s t c o v e r story. C o n -
t r i b u t o r s a r e ve r y m u c h in
d e m a n d .
C O L U M N S
D u e t o a s u d d e n ( and very u n e x -
pec t ed ) spu r t o f g r a d u a t i o n a n d
P h D c o m p l e t i o n o n the pa r t of
last y e a r ' s c o l u m n i s t s n o w ' s the
t i m e f o r t h e m o r e c o m m i t t e d
a n d / o r o p i n i o n a t e d o f y o u to
o f f e r y o u r s e r v i c e s . W a n t to s p o u t
off eve ry w e e k a b o u t l i f e , l iberty,
l o v e e tc e t c ? O r h a v e y o u r o w n
s p a c e t o u n c o v e r G o d k n o w s
w h a t h i d d e n se c r e t s o f the r ich
a n d f a m o u s ? T h e n s i m p l y e m a i l
f e l i x @ i c . a c . u k
CLUBS & SOCIETIES
A n y c l u b o r s o c i e t y c a n s u b m i t a n
a r t i c l e d e t a i l i n g r e c e n t act iv i ty ,
p l a n n e d t r ips o r s p e a k e r e ven t s .
Just r e m e m b e r to g i v e at l eas t
s e v e n d a y s n o t i c e if y o u rea l l y
w a n t y o u r p i e c e to g o in a s p e -
c i f i c i s s u e .
1 e
yJohn Simpson, Director of IC's Careers Service, explains why it pays to think ahead when it comes to finding a career.
We l c o m e to I m p e r i a l C o l -
l e g e . The next th ree o r
f o u r y e a r s s h o u l d b e
a m o n g s t the m o s t i n t e res t ing a n d
e n j o y a b l e in y o u r l i f e , p r o v i d e d
y o u m a k e the m o s t o f the o p p o r -
tuni t ies a v a i l a b l e at C o l l e g e . W h a t
f o l l o w s s h o u l d g i v e y o u s o m e
ideas f o r y o u r o w n s e l f - d e v e l o p -
men t .
You c a n p r o b a b l y r e c a l l o n e of
the s i g n i f i c a n t s teps in y o u r life
w h e n y o u e n t e r e d the sixth f o r m o r
went to Sixth F o r m C o l l e g e . C o m -
ing to C o l l e g e is a n e v e n m o r e
s i g n i f i c a n t s t ep . Y o u h a v e m o r e
f r e e d o m , m o r e i n d e p e n d e n c e a n d
m o r e o p p o r t u n i t i e s to d o y o u r o w n
th ing a n d to s u c c e e d o r f a i l . If y o u
d o not m a k e s o m e m i s t a k e s y o u
wi l l n o t h a v e l e a r n t a n y t h i n g ,
l e a r n i n g f r o m o n e ' s o w n m i s t a k e s
is a n i m p o r t a n t par t o f e x p e r i e n c e ,
but d o n ' t was t e t im e r e i n v e n t i n g
eve ry th ing - b u i l d o n the e x p e r i -
e n c e of o the r s - t a k e a d v i c e (it's
usua l l y free) - i g n o r e s o m e o f it,
test it o u t , a c c e p t o r re ject it.
You h a v e a l r e a d y d e m o n s t r a t -
e d s o m e p l a n n i n g ab i l i t y by p a s s -
ing A leve ls - o r the i r e q u i v a l e n t -
suf f i c ient ly we l l t o b e a t C o l l e g e .
H o w a r e y o u g o i n g to p l a n the
next t h r ee , f o u r o r six y e a r s ? A n d
I'm not just t a l k i n g a b o u t y o u r
a c a d e m i c s t u d i e s , I 'm t a l k i n g
a b o u t the start o f the rest o f y o u r
l i fe .
W h a t d o y o u w a n t t o a c h i e v e
this t e r m ? M a k i n g f r i ends is u s u a l -
ly h i g h o n m o s t p e o p l e ' s l ist .
H o w ? J o i n c l u b s a n d s o c i e t i e s ,
a t t end m e e t i n g s , t a k e u p a n e w
spor t , d e v e l o p a n e w interest -
a n y of these a r e l ike ly to b r i n g y o u
in to c o n t a c t w i th l i k e - m i n d e d s t u -
den t s . A n d the r e ' s a l w a y s the b a r
to p r o p up w h i l e s p e a k i n g i n s p i r a -
t i o n .
By the e n d of the s u m m e r t e rm
in y o u r first y e a r y o u a r e f e e l i n g
the f i n a n c i a l p r e s su re s - in o t h e r
w o r d s , y o u ' r e b r o k e ! S o h o w
a b o u t e a r n i n g s o m e g o o d m o n e y
in the l o n g v a c a t i o n . If y o u l e a v e
j o b h u n t i n g un t i l t h e v a c a t i o n
starts y o u m a y b e t o o la te . A l l the
in te res t ing a n d lu c r a t i v e j obs h a v e
b e e n f i l l ed a l r e a d y a n d y o u ' l l b e
lucky if the l o c a l c o u n c i l wan ts
s o m e g r a s s cu t t i ng o r the l o c a l
g a r d e n cen t r e n e e d s a dirty p a i r o f
h a n d s . It's we l l w o r t h w h i l e d o i n g
s o m e p r e l i m i n a r y j o b h u n t i n g
b e t w e e n C h r i s t m a s a n d Easter .
C a l l in at the IC C a r e e r s Se r v i ce
( r o o m 3 1 0 Sher f i e ld ) w h e r e you
wi l l f i n d i n f o r m a t i o n a b o u t V a c a -
t i on T r a i n i n g , wr i te to e m p l o y e r s
wi th y o u r C V , c a l l in to s o m e s h o p s
a n d ho te l s a n d see w h o ' s a d v e r t i s -
ing in the l o c a l p ress .
V a c a t i o n j obs c a n b e m o s t
i n f o r m a t i v e . Idea l ly they g i v e you
the c h a n c e to try o u t s o m e type of
w o k o r fu ture e m p l o y e r in w h i c h
y o u a r e i n t e r e s t ed . They g i v e you
e x p e r i e n c e in j ob h u n t i n g , letter
w r i t i ng a n d in te r v i ews , as we l l as a
rea l i ns igh t in to w h a t it 's l ike to
w o r k f o r a p a r t i c u l a r t ype o f
e m p l o y e r . S o m e e ven pay y o u
qu i t e w e l l . J o b s a b r o a d a r e p o p u -
l a r a n d e a r l y a p p l i c a t i o n s a r e
e s s e n t i a l . Start by v is i t ing the IC
C a r e e r s S e r v i c e , w h i c h h a s a
g o o d r a n g e of r e f e r ence b o o k s
a n d a d d r e s s e s .
A t the start o f the s e c o n d yea r
y o u r a i s e y o u r s ights h igher . N o w
is the t i m e t o test y o u r ski l ls in
o r g a n i s i n g s o m e t h i n g - a s o c i a l
e v e n i n g f o r y o u r d e p a r t m e n t ,
l o o k i n g a f te r the f i n a n c e s of a
s o c i e t y o r the f ix tures o f y o u r
t e a m . T h a t s o u n d s f a r t o o m u c h
l ike h a r d w o r k I h e a r y o u say. Yes,
it d o e s t ake s o m e ef for t o n y o u r
par t but , g e n e r a l l y s p e a k i n g , the
m o r e ef for t you put into s o m e t h i n g
the m o r e e n j o y m e n t y o u wi l l ge t
o u t o f it.
C o m m i t t e e w o r k is a n e x c e l -
lent p r e p a r a t i o n f o r life a f ter C o l -
l e g e . Y o u l ea rn to set a g e n d a s ,
run m e e t i n g s , a g r e e a c t i o n s , p e r -
s u a d e o t h e r s tudents to d o t h i n g s ,
w o r k w i th in b u d g e t s a n d e n d u p
wi th a s u c c e s s f u l even t - a party,
a v is i t , a p l a y o r a n e w s p a p e r -
just th ink o w e m u c h effort went
i n to p r o d u c i n g this e d i t i o n of Fel ix.
Y o u s h o u l d start t h i n k i n g s e r i -
o u s l y a b o u t y o u r fu tu re c a r e e r
b e f o r e the e n d of the s e c o n d year.
En if y o u haven ' t a c l u e w h a t you
w a n t to d o , tha t ' s n o e x c u s e f o r
d e l a y i n g f i n d i n g ou t a b o u t the
p o s s i b i l i t i e s . You a r e s u r r o u n d e d
w i th s o u r c e s o f i n f o r m a t i o n -
f r i e n d s , f a m i l y , t u t o r s , c a r e e r s
a d v i s o r s , l i b r a r i e s a n d the internet .
Start l o o k i n g . It m a y be a l o n g
p r o c e s s , but so is l i fe , so it rea l l y is
w o r t h s p e n d i n g m o r e t im e t h i n k -
ing a b o u t y o u r c a r e e r t h a n p l a n -
n i n g y o u r next h o l i d a y o r w e e k e n d
away .
The IC C a r e e r s Se rv i ce is a
g o o d s ta r t ing p l a c e . Pop in a n d
s p e a k to the i n f o r m a t i o n staff.
F ind out a b o u t ' P r o s p e c t (HE) ' ,
o u r c o m p u t e r d r i v e n c a r e e r s g u i d -
a n c e sys tem - a n d a l l the i n f o r m a -
t i on b o o k l e t s a n d r e f e r ence f i l es .
H a v e a l o o k at s o m e of the
v i d e o s , a t t end s o m e s e m i n a r s o n
c a r e e r s , get you r se l f so r t ed out .
The M i l k r o u n d is in the s p r i n g
te rm of y o u r f i n a l year . Th i s is
w h e n e m p l o y e r s v is i t c a m p u s e s to
in te rv i ew a p p l i c a n t s o r inv i te y o u
to the i r L o n d o n O f f i c e s . C h r i s t m a s
v a c a t i o n c o u r s e s a r e a p o p u l a r
w a y of f i n d i n g o u t a b o u t c a r e e r s
s u c h as m a r k e t i n g but on l y a f ew
m a j o r rec ru i te rs run t h e m a n d they
a r e n o r m a l l y m a n y t i m e s o v e r s u b -
s c r i b e d .
S t o p ! I'm o n l y a f r e she r - why
a r e y o u t e l l i n g m e th is ? I'm te l l i ng
you b e c a u s e you n e e d to start
p l a n n i n g y o u r l ife n o w , d o n ' t just
drift t h r o u g h C o l l e g e a n d e m e r g e
with a d e g r e e a n d n o t h i n g e l s e .
O f c o u r s e a d e g r e e is i m p o r t a n t
a n d s h o u l d b e y o u r first pr ior i ty ,
but it mus tn ' t be y o u r on l y pr ior i ty .
In the m e a n t i m e , en joy y o u r -
self.
9 e
21 February - 2 March 2000
A journey through
Thailand in aid of NCH Action For Children
e
d
Contact Kevin Terry on:
0171-704 7019 r
* h
action for chi ldren
Q
H
8 l x
Sabbatical Manifestos At the request of the new Union President, Felix reprints this year's sabbatical manifestoes as a
reminder of what your representatives have promised to do in return for their £14 000 a year. How
ever, political manifestoes are rarely written in plain English, so to make them easier to understand
we've passed the text through Felix's state of the art Acme Read-Between-The-Lines-O-Meter™.
ICU President Natasha Newton
3 0 0 words to say " m o r e of the g o o d , less of the
b a d " , still, if peop l e are wi l l ing to read this, here 's
what I think ou r Un ion ' s priorities shou ld be. ������������ I know thai getting elected has
nothing to do with manifesto promises...
1. Students
Every report the U n i o n makes within itself a n d
to the rest of the student body shou ld start with what
is be ing d o n e for us students, h o w we will benefit. ������������ I'll show you all how great I am.
2. Students
The objectives for al l meet ings shou ld be ,
. students
2. students
3. students
4 . money, co l l ege ' s o p i n i o n . . . . (give o r take
legality and other m ino r matters). ������������ Pot the students first. And second.
And third. But we need to make some money. And
we have to do what College tell us.
S imple examp le , U n i o n peop le shou ld cont in-
ue he lp ing correct budgets . After all which students
are he lped if a c lub doesn ' t get its money. ������������ But losing £36,000 on two s u m-
m e r ba l l is definitely in your interests...
3. Students
The facilities and activities of the U n i o n are
ava i lab le to al l of us a n d that needs to be c o m m u -
nicated. ������������ Please don't take away my sports
ground. . .
N a h , s**t, I a p p e a r to have ment ioned c o m -
mun ica t ion , here we g o , the s tandard unreal p r o m -
ises yet, year after year it barely gets better. But for
what it's worth, here are my pract ical ideas in a d d i -
t ion to the obv ious ema i l , Felix a n d the U n i o n struc-
ture.
[translafionj ERROR READING DATA ERROR
ENGLISH N O T RECOGNISED INPUT ERROR
Keep it s imple ! L ike . . . .
The hardware : As a c c o m m o d a t i o n officer, I a m ,
at the moment , a r rang ing m o d e m s a n d PCs for W i l -
son House and seeing co l lege about internal IC
lines. The same cou ld h a p p e n in other outlying halls. ������������ But none of my friends live in Eve-
lyn Gardens, so they can walk into College.
The info: Every week a list of the meet ings tak-
ing p lace a n d s o m e contac t detai ls needs posting
o n al l U n i o n notice boa rds , in Felix a n d Stoic text.
Then if there's someth ing that may affect y o u , you
have a c h a n c e to talk to the peop l e involved a n d
find out the o u t c o m e . ������������ You won't want to get involved so
I'll tell you what to do.
So thanks for read ing a n d (this is the cheesy
bit...sorry) remember , a vote f o r T a s h a Newton is a
vote for students c o m i n g first. C o n t a c t 0 9 5 8 7 0 7
4 1 5
[translation! Help...too...many...jokes.
Deputy President (Clubs & Societies) - Tim Trailor
N e x t y e a r w i l l b e o n e of the m o s t c h a l l e n g i n g
yea r s f a c e d by the ( C & S ) . ������������ As I will have to clear up the
mess last years DP(C&S) left, ad the one
before, and the one before that etc. etc.
A l l c l u b s a n d s o c i e t i e s a r e f a c i n g a n
u p h e a v a l o f o n e k i n d o r a n o t h e r . ������������ Be it moving into portacabins
or being forced to shut down as a result of not
following Health & Safety regulations.
M a n y o f the s o c i e t i e s b a s e d in S o u t h K e n s -
i n g t o n w i l l b e a c q u i r i n g n e w f a c i l i t i e s c o u r t e s y
of the U n i o n s e x p a n s i o n in to w h a t w a s unt i l
r e cen t l y the B i o l o g y d e p a r t m e n t , ������������ And the acquisition of a cou-
ple of s p o r t s fields courtesy of the
College...best not to mention them though.
But p r o b a b l y the b i g g e s t c l o u d st i l l h a n g -
ing o v e r the h e a d o f next y e a r s (C&S ) w i l l
b e the I C S M m e r g e r i s s u e . ������������ Bloody medics.
W h a t wi th the I C S M R F C h a v i n g s h o w n
t h e m s e l v e s to be a f o r c e to be r e c k o n e d w i th
it is n o w as i m p e r a t i v e as eve r that the u n i q u e
ident i t y o f I C S M a n d I C U t e a m s is p r e s e r v e d . ������������ Especially as the ICU Rugby
team kicked medical ass in the University of
London Gutteridge Cup competition.
A s a m e m b e r o f the I C U H o c k e y C l u b
Exec a n d as a r e - a p p (in a ha l l c o n t a i n i n g
m a n y m e d i c s )
[ t r a n s l a t i o n ] S o m e of my friends are
medics, honest...
I h a v e b e e n w e l l p l a c e d o v e r this p a s t y e a r
to o b s e r v e w h a t y o u w a n t f r o m y o u r c l u b s a n d
s o c i e t i e s . I b e l i e v e tha t it is e s s e n t i a l tha t next
yea r s (C&S ) is s o m e o n e w i th a g r e a t d e a l
o f k n o w l e d g e c o n c e r n i n g the m e r g e r a n d the
p o s i t i o n that m o s t s p o r t i n g c l u b s at I m p e r i a l
w i l l f a c e o v e r the next 1 8 m o n t h s . A n y b o d y
t a k i n g o v e r a s (C&S ) w h o d o e s n ' t h a v e a
f i rm b a c k g r o u n d w i t h i n a s p o r t i n g c l u b w o u l d
no t h a v e the ab i l i t y t o r e p r e s e n t y o u a n d y o u r
U n i o n a p p r o p r i a t e l y to o r g a n i s a t i o n s s u c h as
B U S A a n d U L U .
[translation] Hockey, hockey, ra ra ra. Who
cares about those other clubs anyway?
I b e l i e v e tha t I h a v e g o t the n e c e s s a r y
g r o u n d i n g w i t h i n the s p o r t i n g f ra te rn i t y to r ep-
resent t h e m w e l l a l o n g w i th the d e s i r e to l isten
to a n d s u p p o r t the o t h e r c l u b s a n d s o c i e t i e s . It
is t hese q u a l i t i e s a l o n g w i th a p a s s i o n a t e
d e s i r e to d o this j o b , a n d d o it w e l l , that w o u l d
m a k e m e a n e x c e l l e n t c a n d i d a t e f o r the j ob -
so vo te f o r m e f o r ( C & S ) !
[translation] I believe I have acquired the
necessary skills during my hockey career to
communicate with the other sports sabbaticals
in London during our drunken meetings, and
to pull whatever random teenagers I ULU
sports sabbaticals make themselves available
to me... Anyone seen any seventeen year old
girls?
1 l 9
Deputy President (Finance & Services) - Ian Clifford
You m a y ask why you shou ld vote for Ian C l i f f o rd .
[translation] You've never heard o f m e a n d /
have no real policies...
Firstly, I have exper ience of the U n i o n f i nance
system. As treasurer of the City & G u i l d s C o l l e g e
U n i o n I work with c lubs & societ ies , assist ing them
with budgets , c l a ims a n d unrave l l ing red tape . I
have f a ced the d r e a d e d U n i o n budge t i ng rounds
a n d w o n .
[translation] The crowning glory of my two
terms as C&G treasurer was the successful pur-
chase of silly hats for our bar nights.
I have p repa red the f inances of the C & G U as
a who le . I know h o w the U n i o n runs f rom a c lub
f inance side as well as the services s ide.
[translation] The job title's got the word servic-
es in, so I'd better mention them somewhere.
Secondly , I have been a student at Imperial for
five years and a m e m b e r of several c lubs inc lud ing
the M o u n t a i n e e r i n g C l u b , P iml i co C o n n e c t i o n a n d
the C a t h o l i c Soc ie ty
[translation] If you have any spa re ropes , text
b o o k s or crucifixes, please donate them to Ian Clif-
ford c/o the Union Office. W e have no money after
buying the hats and purchasing sabbatical T-shirts.
I work in the U n i o n Resource Cen t re , he lp ing
both students a n d un ion staff - I will be as
a p p r o a c h a b l e as a sabba t i ca l like I a m as a m e m -
ber of staff. Personal contact a n d interest is i m p o r -
tant in establ ishing a g o o d work ing re lat ionship.
Deputy President (Education & Welfare) - Kevin Butcher
Final ly I C U has c r e a t e d a s a b b a t i c a l r e s p o n s i b l e
for e d u c a t i o n a n d we l f a r e . I feel c o n f i d e n t in t ak-
ing o n a n u n d e f i n e d ro le a n d c rea t i ng a j ob
desc r ip t i on - e n c o m p a s s i n g a l l aspec t s of e d u -
ca t i on a n d we l f a re .
[translation] It was very kind of the Union to
provide me with a "job description" and then for
the president to take it away...
S ince c o m i n g to Imper ia l as a p o s t g r a d u a t e
s tudent I've b e e n i n v o l v e d in the u n i o n : c h a i r o f
Imper ia l Q u e e r s a n d S C C t reasure r this year.
Be fore Imper ia l I w a s i n v o l v e d with c l ubs of
O x f o r d a n d Aberys twyth a n d was a vo lun tee r for
O x f o r d N i g h t l i n e . This e x p e r i e n c e has g i v en m e
the necessary m o t i v a t i o n , l i s ten ing ski l ls , p e o p l e
sk i l l s , a p p r o a c h a b i l i t y a n d f a i r j u d g e m e n t
r equ i r ed fo r D P (E&W) .
[translation] Trust me, I'm fluffy enough for
this job.
I have three m a i n a i m s . Firstly ! in tend to
work o n the we l f a re c o m m i t t e e ' s j ob d e s c r i p t i o n .
This wi l l be in consu l t a t i on with a l l the re levant
U n i o n a n d C o l l e g e commi t t ees ( A c c o m m o d a -
t i on , we l f a re , A c a d e m i c Af fa i r s , S tudent D e v e l -
o p m e n t etc.) the current s abbs a n d va r ious c o l -
lege off icers ( inc lud ing the Pro-Rector for E d u c a -
t i ona l Qua l i t y ) .
[translation] Come on, you have to vote for
me - I know the n a m e s o f all the College staff
and everything.
S e c o n d l y I in tend to ask as m a n y of the E & W
s a b b s a c ross the count ry a b o u t their ro le , their
c o n c e r n s a n d h o p e s . The first two w o u l d be
c o m p l e t e d be fo re the new a c a d e m i c year.
[translation] I'll go on lots of e x p e n s e s p a d
" fac t finding" missions.
Third ly , start ing the new term with this b a s e ,
I wil l consu l t as m an y students as poss ib l e . D P
(E&W) wil l wo rk best if as m a n y p e o p l e as p o s s i -
b le a re m a d e a w a r e of the e d u c a t i o n a n d w e l -
fare brief a n d it the job is t a i l o r ed to the needs of
the students . I w o u l d unde r t ake a regu la r sec t ion
[translation] And we all know how friendly the
Union staff are
Next year I a im to:
• Increase c o m m u n i c a t i o n s & tra in ing with
treasurers
[translation] You might be able to read the
finance manual without falling asleep.
• O p e n up the un ion to m o r e students
[translation] Don't know where we're going to
put them though - we can't afford any more space.
• Reform fund ing , payments a n d s tandard ise
subsidies
[translation] Coincidently giving more money
to C&G, Mountaineering, Pimlico Connection,
Catholic Soc iety . . .
in Felix a n d the C C U p a p e r s .
[translation] I am the only sabbatical actual-
ly intending to get something done this year...
A w a r e n e s s events ( abou t two pe r term) wi l l
c o i n c i d e with students e x p e r i e n c e s (eg a c c o m -
m o d a t i o n w e e k w h e n s tudents a re th ink ing
a b o u t h o u s i n g , a sexua l hea l th week to c o i n c i d e
with W o r l d A IDS Day, a stress buster to c o i n c i d e
(as c l o se as poss ib le ) with e x a m s a n d a menta l
hea l th week . I h o p e to c o n v i n c e C C U off icers
a n d the d e p reps to ensure that s tudent repre-
senta t ion is fa i r a n d a d e q u a t e a c r o s s a l l d e p a r t -
ments .
ftrans/afion] Hopefully the CCU officers and
dep reps won't be quite as useless as u s u a l . . .
Felix Editor - Dave Roberts
Fel ix is the p r i m a r y s o u r c e o f i n f o r m a t i o n f o r
s tudents at I m p e r i a l , s o it's v i ta l that it p resents
e n o u g h m a t e r i a l fo r s tuden ts to r e a c h the i r o w n
o p i n i o n s o n key issues - whi ls t the r e p o r t i n g
itself r e m a i n s u n b i a s e d .
[translation] Felix is the primary source of
scandal and manipulative articles at Imperial
College. I will use subliminal messaging to get
my views a c r o s s . Your opinion means nothing.
To this e n d , I'll i n t r o d u c e r e g u l a r i n-dep th
f ea tu res o n the m a j o r s tuden t issues - l ike U L U ,
fees a n d C o l l e g e e x p a n s i o n - so tha t e v e r y o n e
has a c h a n c e to u n d e r s t a n d what ' s rea l l y g o i n g
o n . P r o p e r d i s s e m i n a t i o n of i n f o r m a t i o n a l s o
m e a n s p r o p e r d i s t r i b u t i o n , so I'll e n s u r e that
Fel ix hits every c a m p u s o n the s a m e day , a n d
a p p e a r s o n the w e b every w e e k .
[translation] Because at Imperial we really
care about ULU, fees, and College expansion.
Bollocks more like.
C l u b s a n d s oc i e t i e s s h o u l d h a v e the o p p o r -
tunity to tell e v e r y o n e w h a t they d o . C o n s e -
quent ly , I'll p r o v i d e s p a c e f o r every c l u b to write
rev iews of events o r p rev i ew u p c o m i n g activity.
S i m i l a r l y , s p o r t s c o v e r a g e n e e d s t o b e
i m p r o v e d , with a d e d i c a t e d t e a m of repor te r s
a n d p h o t o g r a p h e r s to c o v e r m a t c h e s at H a r -
l i n g t o n , C o b h a m a n d T e d d i n g t o n .
[translation] Look, s e e - / k n o w the names
of the sports grounds.
F ina l ly , b o t h I C U a n d the C o n s t i t u e n t C o l -
l e g e U n i o n s s h o u l d be g i ven s p a c e to repor t o n
the i r ac t i v i t i es a n d justify t h e m s e l v e s - thus m a k -
ing o u r r epresen ta t i ves m o r e a c c o u n t a b l e .
[translation] ICU and C C U ' s justifying them-
selves? I'll eat my copy first. Please, keep your
bullshit down to a minimum of 100 words.
Felix is a c l u b , a n d l ike any o the r at Imper-
ia l it m u s t b e o p e n t o a l l . A s we l l a s i n c r e a s e d
p u b l i c i t y ( e spec i a l l y d u r i n g F reshers W e e k )
the re n e e d s to b e m o r e f r e e d o m fo r p e o p l e to
write o c c a s i o n a l a r t i c l e s , f ea tu res o r short s to-
r ies , r a the r t h a n h a v i n g to d e d i c a t e the i r l ives to
the n e w s p a p e r .
[translation] I love Felix. I'm in the office all
day, every day and every night. Come in and
say hello and write something. Please. I'm des-
perate
I'll a l s o have week l y m e e t i n g s at St Mary ' s
a n d C h a r i n g C r o s s , to e n s u r e a s w i d e a r a n g e
of c o n t r i b u t o r s as p o s s i b l e .
[translationj B e c a u s e / n e e d the m e d i c s to
vote for me...RAH RAH TEDDINGTON
I b e l i e v e that these c h a n g e s a r e n e c e s s a r y to
e n s u r e that Fel ix m a i n t a i n s its ro le as the news-
p a p e r fo r the s tudents a n d of the s tuden t s , a n d
h a v i n g b e e n i n v o l v e d fo r the best par t of three
years - as a writer, rev iewer , A d v e r t i s i n g M a n -
age r , F i lm Editor , a n d n o w Ass i s t an t Ed i to r - I
have the ab i l i t y to put these c h a n g e s into p r a c -
t i ce .
[translations] I write in very, very long sen-
tences.
l
MEach week we hand over a page to one of IC's four faculty unions, and this week it's the turn of the
Sabbatical Med School Union President, Becky England, to explain who she is and what she does. W e a re n o w w e l c o m i n g o u r s e c -
o n d i n t ake o f s tuden ts in to the r e l -
at ive ly n e w site at IC . T h e n e w
freshers s h o u l d bene f i t f r o m the
input f r o m last yea r s first y ea r s
e n a b l i n g us to m a k e life e a s i e r f o r
t h e m . Last y e a r w a s a p a r t i c u l a r l y
h a r d y e a r f o r a l l o f o u r s tuden t s
w i th in I C S M . O l d w e r e w e l c o m i n g
in t h e n e w w h i l s t t h e m s e l v e s
b e c o m i n g u s e d to a n e w e n v i r o n -
m en t a n d m e d i c a l s c h o o l s t ru c-
tu r e ; a n d the f reshe rs w e r e not
on l y d e a l i n g with the u s u a l ' f r e s h -
ers n i g h t m a r e s ' bu t a l s o c o p i n g
with b e i n g the first i n t ake of a n e w
c o u r s e w i th in a new b u i l d i n g .
Th i s y e a r w e h a v e a re la t i ve l y
f r e sh s t u d e n t s u n i o n , a l t h o u g h
s o m e f a c e s have not c h a n g e d . . . .
J o M a n s o n has t a k e n the ro l e o f
V i c e P r e s i d e n t I n t e rna l M a r y ' s ,
w i th L izz ie R o b i n s o n n o w V i c e
P r e s i d e n t E x t e r n a l a n d W a d e
G a y e d has b e c o m e E d u c a t i o n r ep
for C h a r i n g C r o s s . I myse l f h a v e
not b e e n a d i r e c t m e m b e r o f the
s tuden t s ' u n i o n a l t h o u g h I w a s
h e a v i l y i n v o l v e d in I C S M R A G
W e e k 1 9 9 9 . T h e rest h a v e a l l
b e e n i n v o l v e d w i th the o r g a n i s a -
t ion of v a r i o u s even ts a n d c l u b s
t h r o u g h o u t the M e d S c h o o l a n d
I'm su re a r e g o i n g to d o a f a n t a s -
tic j ob o v e r the next year .
To b e g i n w e h a v e o u r F R E S H -
ERS ' W E E K , r u n n i n g f r o m the 3 r d
to the 9 th of O c t o b e r . O u r S o c i a l
S e c r e t a r i e s , A n n a a n d C h e w y , w i th
the h e l p o f S u s i e ( T r e a s u r e r ) ,
M a r i s s a (Secretary ) , A l i s o n ( C l u b s
a n d S o c s ) , A l i a (VPI C h a r i n g
C r o s s ) a n d J o ; h a v e put t o g e t h e r
w h a t l o o k s to be a w e e k of s h e a r
fun a n d g a m e s , (not t a k i n g in to
a c c o u n t the m o r n i n g a f te r e x p e r i -
e n c e s a w a i t i n g a n y p o o r u n f o r t u -
nates ) . De t a i l s a r e g i v e n in the
f r e s h e r s ' h a n d b o o k a n d o n
pos te r s a r o u n d the c a m p u s e s . O n
O c t o b e r 16 t h w e a r e h o l d i n g the
I C S M F reshe r s ' Ba l l at C h e l s e a
F o o t b a l l C l u b , with a p a r t i c u l a r
f a v o u r i t e o f m i n e as the
t h e m e " A u s t i n P o w e r s " (watch
o u t f o r g i r ls w i th w e a p o n s w h e r e
you m i g h t not e x p e c t , b o y s , y o u ' d
bet ter h o l d o n t o y o u r m o j o l ) . T i ck-
ets wi l l be o n sa i l at the m a j o r
c a m p u s e s w h e n t e rm b e g i n s .
T h r o u g h o u t the yea r we h o p e
to h o l d a l l the t r a d i t i o n a l s o c i a l
events the M e d S c h o o l expec t s
a n d a l s o to a d d s o m e m o r e . A n y
i d e a s p l e a s e s e n d t h e m in o u r
d i r e c t i o n ! W e in tend to host the
s e c o n d I C S M S u m m e r Ba l l in the
first w e e k of July, a f i rm da te wi l l
be set in the n e a r f u t u r e ; a n y o n e
in te res ted in s t a n d i n g f o r S u m m e r
Ba l l c h a i r s h o u l d w a t c h ou t fo r
e l e c t i o n i n f o , g o i n g up in the first
f ew w e e k s of t e r m .
C l u b s a n d Soc i e t i e s w i l l , as
a l w a y s be a n in t eg ra l par t of M e d
S c h o o l l i fe , wi th a c l u b fo r 9 9 % of
p e o p l e s tas tes . T h e O p e r a Soc ie t y
wi l l be s t a g i n g ' C r a z y For y o u ' in
D e c e m b e r , the D r a m s o c I'm sure
w i l l b e ac t i ve at v a r i o u s po in t s
t h r o u g h o u t the y e a r a n d the m u l t i -
t ude of m u s i c soc s wi l l be sure to
m a k e the i r p r e s e n c e felt. Spor t s
c o n t i n u e to f l ou r i sh at I C S M with
o u r 1st Rugby t e a m d e s t i n e d f o r
E u r o p e . Fo r i n f o r m a t i o n o n a n y of
the c l u b s e i ther c o m e a l o n g to the
F r e s h e r s ' F a i r o n T u e s d a y 5 t h
O c t o b e r at the A l e x a n d e r F l e m i n g
B u i l d i n g in the a f t e r n o o n , o r c o n -
tact myse l f o r the C l u b s & S o c s
r e p , A l i s o n O g i l v i e .
T h r o u g h o u t the c o m i n g y e a r
m a n y issues c l o s e to the hear ts of
the m e d i c s wi l l a r i s e T h e fu tu re o f
o u r c l i n i c a l s i tes ; the fu ture of o u r
spor ts g r o u n d s ; the p r o s p e c t of
m e r g e r of the spor t s t e a m s a n d
the d e v e l o p m e n t o f the n e w
c o u r s e a n d the r e p e r c u s s i o n s o n
bo th the o l d a n d new students .
The s tuden t s ' u n i o n a i m s to r e p r e -
sent the s t u d e n t s ' v i e w s , a n d
t h e r e f o r e a n y i npu t wi l l be read i l y
r e c e i v e d .
A s p r e s i d e n t ( f ina l l y , a f t e r
s c r a p i n g t h r o u g h the n i g h t m a r e of
2 n d M B ) , I w i l l b e b a s e d p r i m a r i l y
o n the S o u t h K e n s i n g t o n C a m p u s ,
in the A l e x a n d e r F l e m i n g B u i l d i n g
( former ly the B M S ) . H o w e v e r , my
p l a n , (subject to c h a n g e ! ) is to
s p e n d T u e s d a y m o r n i n g s at St
M a r y ' s , W e d n e s d a y m o r n i n g s at
C h a r i n g C r o s s a n d every s e c o n d
T h u r s d a y l u n c h t i m e at T h e
C h e l s e a a n d Wes tm ins te r .
P l e a s e fee l f r ee to c a l l wi th any
q u e r i e s , p r o b l e m s o r g e n e r a l
g r u m b l e s .
Contacts Contacts
President - Becky England Vice Presidents Officers
M o b i l e : 0 7 7 1 3 7 4 1 0 0 3
O f f i c e : 0 1 7 1 5 9 4 8 0 7 9
E m a i l : r e b e c c a . e n g l a n d @ i c . a c . u k
V P ( Internal) St M a r y ' s - J o M a n s o n
V P ( Internal) C h a r i n g C r o s s - A l i a F a m m y
V P (External ) - L izzie R o b i n s o n
C l u b s & S o c i e t i e s - A l i s o n O g i l v i e
T r easu re r - Sus i e B l o c h
Sec re ta r y - M a r i s s a S ee
1 n 1
The State of the Union By Natasha Newton, Imperial College Union President
He l l o , to a l l the new s tu-
de n t s , w e l c o m e b a c k to a l l
the o l d . W e l l , w h a t a s u m -
mer ! To the F reshers , let m e i n t ro-
d u c e the c o l u m n . Th is is a week l y
u p d a t e of w h a t the U n i o n is u p t o ,
wha t we as y o u r r ep resen ta t i ves
a re d o i n g f o r y o u a n d qu i t e o f t e n ,
why.
S o , w e ' v e b e e n busy, d a V i n c i ' s
has h a d a b i g face l i f t a n d I h o p e
you a g r e e n o w l o o k s tasty. It has
b e e n a c o n s t a n t bat t le as the d e m -
o l i t i on w o r k g o i n g o n in the rest of
Beit has o v e r sp i l l ed in to this e n d
of the b u i l d i n g . Hones t l y , it w a s l ike
a F r ench f a r ce at o n e p o i n t , cu t
wa te r p ipes sett ing of f i re a l a r m s ,
but t h e n they cut t h r o u g h the
e lec t r i cs f o r the fire a l a r m ! ! You
s h o u l d have seen the size o f the
ho l e in the men ' s to i le ts c e i l i n g !
What ' s this a l l a b o u t , t h en ?
W e l l , wi th the c r e a t i o n of
a n e w E d u c a t i o n a n d
W e l f a r e S a b b a t i c a l - tha t ' s m e -
c o m e s a g r e a t e r p r o m o t i o n of the
n o n - c o m m e r c i a l s e r v i ces o f f e r e d
by I C U a n d the r e p r e s e n t a t i o n
u n d e r t a k e n o n y o u r beha l f . A ful l
b r e a k d o w n of the serv i ces a v a i l -
a b l e to you a n d the r e p r e s e n t a t i o n
u n d e r t a k e n o n y o u r b e h a l f c a n be
f o u n d in the S tuden t H a n d b o o k
( a va i l ab l e f r o m the U n i o n R e c e p -
t ion) . Impor tant issues r e l a t i ng to
y o u , w i th in the E d u c a t i o n & W e l -
fare remit , wi l l be a i r e d he re . So
here g o e s
• M e n i n g i t i s
A l l f irst y e a r s t u den t s h a v e
b e e n e n c o u r a g e d to get v a c c i n a t -
e d fo r men ing i t i s be fo r e a r r i v i ng at
C o l l e g e . H o w e v e r , t w o po in t s n e e d
to be m a d e :
Firstly, o v e r s e a s s tudents l i v ing
in H a l l s a r e e s p e c i a l l y e n c o u r a g e d
to visit IC H e a l t h C e n t r e f o r a v a c -
c i n a t i o n .
S e c o n d l y , the v a c c i n a t i o n o n l y
protects a g a i n s t type C men ing i t i s -
w h i c h o n l y r e p r e s e n t s 3 0 % of
men ing i t i s c a s e s r e p o r t e d in the
U K . T h e r e f o r e if y o u h a v e b e e n
v a c c i n a t e d but still h a v e f lu-l ike
s y m p t o m s - p l e a s e visit a d o c t o r o r
ca l l a n a m b u l a n c e to be safe a n d
D o w n to b u s i n e s s . Let's start
s o m e w h e r e f a m i l i a r , the re h a v e
b e e n s o m e b i g c h a n g e s in the
s h o p this s u m m e r , sadly , we have
lost s o m e o l d f r i ends , but we have
g a i n e d two new p e r m a n e n t m e m -
bers , A n d r e w the f l o o r m a n a g e r
a n d D a n i e l the System a n d stock
c l e r k . W e l c o m e g e n t l e m e n , w e
h o p e you surv ive F resher ' s w e e k !
The H e a l t h C e n t r e . P rogress
i n d e e d , the U n i o n a n d the cent re
n o w h a v e r e g u l a r mee t i ngs to d i s -
cuss p r o b l e m s o u r s tudents , the i r
pa t i en t s , encoun te r . If you have a
p r o b l e m with t h e m , you s h o u l d talk
d i rec t to the i r P rac t i ce M a n a g e r in
the first i n s t an ce , but you c a n still
c o m e to us. D u r i n g the s u m m e r
i C U su r veyed the o the r Un ivers i ty
ask a f i r end to l o o k after y o u .
D o n ' t a s s u m e y o u c a n ' t h a v e
men ing i t i s pure ly b e c a u s e y o u ' v e
b e e n v a c c i n a t e d - this is N O T the
c a s e .
If you have not b e e n v a c c i n a t -
e d a n d a re w o r r i e d then IC H e a l t h
C e n t r e wi l l be a b l e to adv i s e a n d
a r r a n g e fo r v a c c i n a t i o n .
• S tudent S u p p o r t S c h e m e
First a n d s e c o n d years a r e n o w
f u n d e d v i a the S tudent S u p p o r t
S c h e m e , w h i c h i n c l u d e s m e a n s -
tested he lp t o w a r d s tu i t ion fees .
U n d e r the new rules s tudents have
a d e a d l i n e by w h i c h they must
a p p l y f o r s u p p o r t , o the rw i se they
wi l l not be e l i g i b l e fo r any f i n a n c i a l
s u p p o r t in future years of study. The
d e a d l i n e is the e n d of the first t e rm
of the i r first year.
Even if you th ink you a re not
e l i g i b l e f o r any he lp with you r
tu i t ion fee you still n e e d to app ly . If
y o u d o not w ish to take ou t any of
the l o a n : app l y , be assessed fo r
s u p p o r t a n d then ask fo r £0 . The
S tudent Loans C o m p a n y wil l then
have y o u r de ta i l s a n d in future
years y o u wi l l be a b l e to app ly .
• W e l f a r e at S i l w o o d Park
O v e r the s u m m e r the p r o v i s i o n
of L o n d o n c o l l e g e s with the i r o w n
H e a l t h C e n t r e s to see h o w they
c o m p a r e to ou r s . W e a re n o w d i s -
c u s s i n g t h e s e resu l ts w i th the
H e a l t h C e n t r e , w h o have t a k e n a
rea l interest.
In a b ig . p a p e r p u s h i n g exer-
c i se , we have e x t e n d e d a n d u p d a t -
e d o u r r e c i p r o c a l a g r e e m e n t s so
you r U n i o n c a r d wi l l g a i n you
acces s to even m o r e Un ivers i t i es
t han ever b e f o r e . W e have a l s o
d o n e s p e c i a l d e a l s fo r the s tudents
at S i l w o o d that they wi l l be a b l e to
g o o v e r to Roya l H o l l o w a y to party.
As you wi l l s e e , o u r s a b b a t i c a l
man i f e s to s have b e e n i n c l u d e d in
this issue if Fel ix, s o , fo r the 3 0 0 0
o d d of you w h o d idn ' t h a ve a
c h a n c e to vote fo r us, you c a n see
of we l f a re fac i l i t ies at S i l w o o d were
r e v i ewed . S u p p o r t l inks be tween
S i l w o o d a n d I C U a r e b e i n g
s t r e n g t h e n e d a n d C o l l e g e h a s
a g r e e d p r o v i s i o n for extra C o u n -
se l lo r t ime , a l l o w i n g fo r a r e g u l a r
visit to S i l w o o d by o n e of the C o l -
l ege C o u n s e l l o r s . This is a g o o d
start to i m p r o v e d p r o v i s i o n at S i l -
w o o d .
• Registry
The A c a d e m i c Registrar , Ve r-
n o n M c C l u r e , wi l l be a v a i l a b l e in
his o f f i ce ( 3 3 9 Sherf ie ld ) o n M o n -
d a y s d u r i n g t e r m - t i m e f r o m
1 . 3 0 p m to 2 . 0 0 p m . N o p r i o r
a p p o i n t m e n t is necessary . This is to
d i scuss matters o ther t h a n those
you w o u l d ra ise with y o u r D e p a r t -
ment o r rout ine enqu i r i e s that the
Registry c a n he lp w i th .
• A n d f inal ly . . .
P l ease feel f ree to c o n t a c t M a r -
tin (the U n i o n Adv i so r ) o r m e with
any ques t i ons o r q u e r i e s - you ' l l
f ind my p h o n e n u m b e r a n d e m a i l
a d d r e s s be low . In par t i cu la r , if y o u
have ques t i ons o r answers to p r o b -
lems you fee l o t h e r s tudents c o u l d
benef i t f r o m , p l e a s e get in t o u c h
a n d the p r o b l e m a n d s o l u t i o n m a y
wel l a p p e a r he re in future e d i t i o n s .
wha t we p r o m i s e d a n d if y o u d o n ' t
l ike it the next s a b b e l e c t i o n s
a r e in F e b r u a r y ! F ina l ly , a s p r o m -
ised at hus t i ngs , I h a v e a jar of f ree
lo l l i es o n my desk a n d here is the
list o f the up a n d c o m i n g m e e t i n g s
f o r the w e e k :
- This Week's Union Meetings -
• W e d s 6 th O c t o b e r : M A D S A C
U n i o n P res ident meets c o l l e g e a n d
the H e a l t h C e n t r e fo r d i s c u s s i o n s
re the se rv i ce they p r o v i d e etc.
• Thurs 7th O c t o b e r : I C U Exec
T h e s a b b s , C C U p re s i den t s a n d 4
m e m b e r s of c o u n c i l (to be e l e c t ed
1 2 th O c t o b e r ) mee t to d i s cuss the
week-to-week m a n a g e m e n t of the
U n i o n .
• Fri 8 th O c t o b e r : R C C C h a i r s
a n d t r easu re r s m e e t i n g .
Essential Contacts
- Kev in Bu tche r -
interna l ex tens ion 5 8 0 6 4
d p e w @ i c . a c . u k
- M a r t i n T h o m s o n , U n i o n A d v i s e r -
(020) 7 5 9 4 8 0 6 7
m . m . t h o m s o n @ i c . a c . u k
- N i g h t l i n e -
(020) 7 6 3 1 0 1 0 1
- IC C o u n s e l l o r s -
(020) 7 5 9 4 9 4 3 0
- IC Tutors -
(020) 7 5 9 4 6 4 3 0 / 6 2 3 8
- IC H e a l t h C e n t r e -
(020) 7 5 8 4 6 3 0 1
- S a m a r i t a n s -
0 3 4 5 9 0 9 0 9 0
- A IDS H e l p l i n e -
0 8 0 0 5 6 7 1 2 3
- A l c o h o l H e l p l i n e -
0 8 0 0 9 1 7 8 2 8 2
- A l o n e in L o n d o n -
(020 ) 7 2 7 8 4 2 2 4
- Q u i t l i n e -
0 8 0 0 0 0 2 2 0 0
Welfare Update By Kevin Butcher, Deputy President (Education & Welfare)
2 k x
FELIX Editorial Staff
Edi lor. : : ! '< berts
Deputy Ed i to r . . . . .Ma r i e N i c o i a o u
Asst Ed (Reviews) V a c a n t
Asst Ed (Layout) V a c a n t
N e w s A r i d re w O f o ri;
Pho tograpy . J o n a s L idsay
Sports „ O u ' P a f i
S c i e n c e V a c a n t
M u s i c p l s | J a m e s & Joe l ;
F i lm H e l e n C l a r k
Arts Ben Fisher
B o o k s V a c a n t
D inrv V a c a n t
ulc.her,
ccy Fng-
T h a c k e r
C o n s o r t
nee
vw . su . i c . a c .uk/
Lond i L C I N 71
F e l l
1 0 4 0 - 0 7 1 1
MIND YOUR VAT
Towards the e n d of last te rm Bas ics ,
the Sou ths ide p izza p l a c e started to
c h a r g e VAT to students p u r c h a s i n g
f o o d f r o m there . Bas ics staff were
instructed by their m a n a g e r s not to
p r o m p t students f o r p roo f of stu-
den t identity, a n d to c h a r g e VAT if
ID was not vo lun tee red . Basics
staff r epor ted to Kevin that this
c h a n g e in p r o c e d u r e resulted in
m a n y students pay ing too m u c h for
the i r P izza . Kevin warns students
that they wil l be o v e r c h a r g e d in this
way by m a n y outlets run by both the
U n i o n a n d C o l l e g e unless they
act ively wave their U n i o n c a rd at
the pe r son serv ing t hem.
NOVELTY GREEN-
HOUSE
Sir N o r m a n Foster, arch i tect of the
B M S b u i l d i n g h a d s o m e p r o b l e m s
with a n o t h e r of his projects , the
G e r m a n g o v e r n m e n t bu i l d i ng the
Re ichs tag , c o m p l e t e d shortly after
o u r o w n g r e e n h o u s e . G o v e r n m e n t
o f f i c i a l s w e r e a s t o n i s h e d w h e n
shortly after m o v i n g in they no t i ced
that the roof was l eak ing . A
s p o k e s m e n for Foster r e s p o n d e d to
the c o m p l a i n t with the statement :
"It w a s a lways the intent ion to a l l o w
water i n " . This leaves Kevin w o n -
de r ing what arch i tec tura l novelt ies
may have been d e s i g n e d into the
South Kens ing ton b u i l d i n g .
VIDEOCONFERENCE
MADNESS
The G r e a t H a l l is to be used for the
R C S freshers ' w e l c o m e , with the
' s h o w ' re layed to those w h o c a n
A Mostly Harmless Column by
Kevin, a random entity who
knows nothing about nothing
not fit in by v i d e o c o n f e r e n c i n g
t e c h n o l o g y to the P ippa rd lecture
theatre in Sher f ie ld . C a n s o m e o n e
f ind the prat w h o is o b s e s s e d with
a l l this v i d e o c o n f e r i n g a n d
v i d e o t e a c h i n g , a n d remote l e a r n -
ing nonsense so we c a n shoo t h i m .
The Royal G e o g r a p h i c a l Society,
wh i ch was used last yea r is a m u c h
m o r e i m p r e s s i v e v e n u e , m o r e
important ly it a l so has the capac i t y
to h o l d a l l the students .
NEW SABBATICALS...
Kev in judges any U n i o n O f f i c e r by
their behav iou r , a n d suspects he
wil l not be the on ly o n e u n i m -
p r e s s e d at s a b b a t i c a l s a b u s i n g
their new- found p o w e r to let their
c ron i e s into so ld-ou t events for
free. It is l ikely that the first t ime
m a n y i m p r e s s i o n a b l e first years see
their s a b b a t i c a l s wi l l be w h e n they
a re usher ing the i r mates past them
into p a c k e d f resher ' s week c a r n i -
vals o r c o m e d y n ights .
In Kev in 's o p i n i o n M i s s N e w t o n
is con f i den t that she is suitably
trendy, yet student-y e n o u g h to l ead
a S tudent ' s U n i o n . Kevin expects
her to be u n c o n c e r n e d with her
i m a g e , be l i e v ing that she has go t
the w h o l e s tudent th ing sor ted .
M o s t of her t ime wil l be spent c o n -
cent ra t ing o n the eff ic ient runn ing
of her o r g a n i s a t i o n . If she suc-
ceeds in p rov i ng herself c a p a b l e of
d o i n g this , it wil l be useful to her
later in life as t o d a y ' s med i c s a re
expec ted to be exce l lent m a n a g e r s
as wel l as doc to r s .
The PopTarts a re in the toaster,
a n d la i r ing to g o .
To comment or contribute:
http://come.to/mishmash
THE TEMPLATE
In the a b s e n c e of any a c t u a l letters
to pub l i sh this week , he re ' s a handy
g u i d e to h o w to p r o d u c e you r o w n :
D e a r D a v i d / Fel ix / Ed i to r / S i r /
M r Roberts (circle one)
I a m wr i t ing t o express m y : (circle)
- a m a z e m e n t at the qual i ty of your
n e w s p a p e r
- a n n o y a n c e ove r the a b s e n c e of
a n y r ea l news a n d excess ive level o f
c o v e r a g e g i v en o v e r to reviews
(music in part icu lar ) a n d sport
- c o n c e r n that my c lub ' s recent
s p e c t a c u l a r p e r f o r m a n c e s have no t
b e e n r epor ted in you r m a g a z i n e
- c l ient ' s w ishes that you no l o n g e r
refer to her as a " b r a i n l e s s s l a p p e r
with the I Q of a g a m e s t e a c h e r "
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11 N O f 8ETT0
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wayputnmk s e e p o s t e r s f o r f u r t h e r d e t a i l s
2 n 5
Win a Young Person's Railcard or a
copy of the new Sex Pistols Book s
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The Islamic Society
warmly welcomes all freshers
to Imperial College
The Islamic society is one of the largest and dynamic
societies at Imperial College catering for students from
all over the world.
The society is well established in organising social
act ivit ies, topical d i scuss ions , exhibit ions and
seminars. Additionally for Muslims we provide very
good prayer facilities and iftar during the month of
Ramadan.
Some upcoming events organised by the society this
year are:
The Islamic Awareness Week
The Big Event'99.
Come and visit us at the freshers' fair for a friendly chat
and your free freshers' pack. Or pop into the prayer
room on the 2nd or 3rd of October.
The Prayer
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situated in
the basement
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D w i n e / ' i d b i ' l ,
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1 [
Li qu id skin 's the funky stuff that you c a n stick
on to your f ingers for p ro tec t i on w h e n you
k n o w that t hey ' r e g o i n g to ge t r i p p e d to
shreds by s o m e bru ta l a n d un fo rg i v i ng gu i t a r
str ings. It's a l so a n a p p r o p r i a t e title to a t t ach to
the G o m e z s o u n d . W h i l e e a c h t rack is d i s t i nc-
tive a n d di f ferent in its o w n r ight, there ' s a n
ove ra l l s o n i c a p p e a r a n c e that ' s h a r d not to
no t i ce . It's this f lu idi ty that is Liquid Skin's
strongest se l l ing po in t .
F o l l o w i n g up o n Br ing it On was never
g o i n g to be easy - mass i ve sa les a n d cr i t ica l
success b a s e d a r o u n d a very d is t inct ive a n d
id iosync ra t i c s o u n d is a h a r d a c t t o f o l l ow , e s p e -
cia l ly as the o r ig ina l i t y na tura l l y s e e m s to van i sh
w h e n you m o v e into s e c o n d a l b u m n territory.
N o n e t h e l e s s , Liquid Skin h o l d s to the s a m e v a l -
ues that m a d e Bring it On a c l a s s i c , a n d whi lst
the o u t c o m e might not be o n qu i te the s a m e
p l a n e , it 's still n i ce to see that char t success a n d
m a s s i v e e a r n i n g s h a v e n ' t d e n t e d G o m e ' s
p roud l y lo-tech s o u n d .
The b e g i n n i n g is s i g n a l l e d by H a n g o v e r , a
m e d i o c r e start that isn't d i s a p p o i n t i n g in that it
serves a s a gen t l e r i pp l e o f w h a t ' s t o f o l l ow . Rev-
o lu t i ona r y Kind p l o d s o n a n d bu i lds itself up
m u c h in the s a m e way Whippin' Piccadilly d id
on Bring It On, a lbe i t in a less ec lec t i c way. It's
cer ta in ly o n e that 's easy for a u d i e n c e s to m a r c h
a l o n g to . The first of a few a u r a l waves then
r ea ches a p e a k with the first s ing le off the a l b u m
a n d p r o b a b l y the first to be n a m e d after you r
p r e v i ou s a l b u m . O r was it the o ther way
a r o u n d ?
The m u s i c a l h igh po in t is Rosalita, a c h a r m -
ing a n d add i c t i ve a c o u s t i c b a l l a d . " Y o u ' v e lost
your pa t i ence . I see myself sink in your e s t i m a -
t i on . Just p l ease talk to me . I won ' t portray
myself so pit i ful ly," a re l ines that m a k e m o r e
sense a n d have m o r e re l evance to m e than
" Y o u say it best w h e n you say no th ing at a l l . "
B lue M o o n Rising sees the t ide g o out u n d e r
cove r of da rkness . A t m o s p h e r i c a n d f i l led with a
k ind of late n ight C o l o m b i a n m o o d i n e s s , it's
seduct ive ly attract ive. Las Vegas D e a l e r then
he ra lds the b a n d s o u n d i n g like they ' re real ly
en joy i ng themse lves a n d I think that this is the
key to their a p p e a l .
T h e y ' r e l ike the p rove rb i a l b i g g e r brother.
The y o u n g kid c o u l d g r a d u a t e with h o n o u r s ,
l and a job with respect a n d shed- loads of
d o u g h but w h e n e v e r there 's a party or fami ly
get-together, it 's b ig b ro ther with his h a p p y exis-
tence that e ve ryone seems to l ike a n d wan t to
have a cha t with. G o m e z m a y not be heavy-
we igh t p layers but they have a w a r m c h a r i s m a
a b o u t t hem that m a k e s y o u wan t to keep on l is-
t en i ng . You c a n t ake G o m e z o r you c a n cut
t hem out . You don ' t have to have a c lue of wha t
they ' re o n a b o u t . You c o u l d d i smiss Liquid Skin
as Bring It On Again. But m e , I'll try any th ing
tw ice .
D e n n i s
1 c 17
Ocean Colour Scene
One for the Modern
Supergrass
Supergrass ��—r
Did y o u h e a r Profit in Peace d u r i n g the
h o l i d a y s ? C h a n c e s a r e tha t y o u d i d .
H o w e v e r , i t 's c o n c e i v a b l e tha t y o u
d i d n ' t g i v e n tha t i t 's r e l e a s e w a s a s l o w key as
a r e - a p p o n the S a t u r d a y n o w g o n e , w h e n
c a r s w e r e j a m m i n g i n t o P r i n c e ' s G a r d e n s a n d
a l l m a n n e r o f l u g g a g e w a s f l o w i n g t o w a r d s
the v a r i o u s H a l l e n t r a n c e s . S t r a n g e tha t ,
s i n c e m u s i c a l l y it w a s q u i t e r a d i o - f r i e n d l y -
f o o t s t a m p i n g l y a l i v e a n d a m i l i t a r y rhy thm
s i g n a l l i n g tha t they a r e r e a d y to start m a r c h -
i n g ( a l r eady ) r o u n d t h e U K l ive c i r cu i t o n c e
a g a i n . Lyr i ca l l y , h o w e v e r , set a g a i n s t the
b a c k d r o p of r e cen t e v e n t s in East T i m o r a n d
yet a n o t h e r m a s s - m u r d e r i n g t e e n a g e s h o o t -
ou t in the U S , " T h e r e ' s n o p ro f i t in p e a c e ,
b o y s , s o y o u m u s t f i gh t s o m e m o r e , " p r o b a -
bly l e a v e s t o o s o u r a tas te in s o m e p e o p l e ' s
m o u t h s .
O n e F r o m The Modern is r e c o g n i s e d by
m a n y a s the i r t h i r d a l b u m (except t h o s e tha t
a r e e i t h e r e x t r e m e l y e a r l y f o l l o w e r s o r p a r t i c -
u l a r l y p e d a n t i c m u s i c a l know- i t-a l l s ) a n d i t ' s
no t ha l f b a d . T h a t ' s no t to say tha t i t 's ha l f
g o o d , t h o u g h . T h e r e a r e a f ew utter ly un-
m e m o r a b l e o r is it i m - m e m o r a b l e ? A n y -
way , t he r e a r e a f e w c o m p l e t e l y f o r g e t t a b l e
t r a c k s , w i th N o One At All a n d Families b e i n g
n o t a b l y g o o d e x a m p l e s of a l b u m f o d d e r .
T h e r e ' s n o i m m e d i a t e i m p a c t l ike the River-
boat Song riff (see TFI Fr iday) o r Hundred
Mile High City (see L o c k , S t o c k a n d Two
S m o k i n g Barre ls ) but if y o u ' r e l o o k i n g f o r
s o m e t h i n g a k i n to a C r a d d o c k g u i t a r r u s h ,
t h e n the o p e n i n g of July w i l l e a s i l y su f f i ce -
sure l y i t 's a l r e a d y w h i r l i n g r o u n d the B B C as
a n e w c o n t e n d e r f o r the G o a l o f the M o n t h
s i g n a t u r e t u n e .
T h e r an t-d r i v en / Am The News is a n
o b v i o u s s i n g l e . The g o r g e o u s l y s i m p l e Step
By Step is a less o b v i o u s c h o i c e . N o t leas t
b e c a u s e it m a y be m i s t a k e n fo r a N e w K ids
O n T h e B l o c k cove r . J a n e She Got Excavated
a n d / Won't Get Grazed are u n d e r s t a t e d
q u a l i t y s o n g s . T h e p r o b l e m , t h o u g h , is tha t I
c a n ' t s p o t a n y ' m o m e n t s ' . N o m a j o r riff e x h i -
b i t i o n . N o e m o t i o n - f i l l e d a c o u s t i c b a l l a d
a n t h e m . P e r h a p s these m o m e n t s wi l l r e v ea l
t h e m s e l v e s w i th t i m e . T o o o f t e n , t h o u g h , the
m o r e w e w a i t the m o r e d i s a p p o i n t e d w e
b e c o m e . A n d w h e n t h e r e ' s a f a i r few o t h e r
o p t i o n s o u t the re - just l o o k a c r o s s t hese
p a g e s f o r e x a m p l e s - w h o wan t s to w a i t ?
Dennis
I
You don ' t know it yet but you ' ve been wait-
ing for this a l b u m . You 've s a m p l e d the
cheeky absurd i ty of Pumping On Your
Stereo a n d exper ienced the sho tgun chorus of
M o v i n g . A n d a l though this shou ld have been a
warn ing shot that some th ing fairly spec ia l was to
fol low, there were other th ings g o i n g o n that
diverted your at tent ion. W e l l it 's t ime you got
back in the swing of th ings, so sit up , sharpen
your penc i l a n d start tak ing s o m e notes. Point 1:
Supergrass have re leased their third a l b u m . Point
2 : It's the best a l b u m this year so far.
If In It For The Money saw s o m e sort of t ran-
sit ion f r om bum-fluff p o p artists to ser ious m u s i -
c ians , then Supergrass re inforces doub le- fo ld the
fact that this transit ion is wel l a n d truly comp le t e .
This is the s o u n d of a b a n d hitting its peak.
The singles have been fantast ic. What Went
Wrong (In Your Head) will p robab l y join t hem, as
the initial s ing ing of the title l ine is the o n e of the
most m e m o r a b l e m o m e n t s of the a l b u m . Var ied
a n d p r o u d , contempla t i ve ( M a m a <& Papa) a n d
somet imes s loganeer ing-ly silly (Jesus C a m e From
Outta Space), Supergrass have c rea ted a piece of
work that ho lds itself up with i m p e c c a b l e ba l ance .
The kids aren' t just a l r ight ; they ' re ou ts tand ing !
Denn is
8 m x
Ta k e The Commitments a n d r e p l a c e s o u l
w i th ' e x p e r i m e n t a l j azz j u n g l e ' ( that ' s
h o w they d e s c r i b e it in the m o v i e , a n d I
c a n ' t t h i n k of a n y t h i n g m o r e a p p r o p r i a t e ) .
N o w r e m o v e the e a s y g o i n g Irish se t t ings a n d
g e n i a l c h a r a c t e r s a n d r e p l a c e w i th m o d e r n
d a y S o u t h East L o n d o n a n d a m i x e d b a g of
j u n k i e s , e g o m a n i a c s , w a s t i n g n o - h o p e r s a n d
a s m a t t e r i n g of g o o d a p p l e s . F i n a l l y a d j u s t
the l eve l a n d the style o f the c o m e d y to c o r -
r e s p o n d to th is n e w s e t t i n g . A n d , h o p e f u l l y ,
w h a t y o u ' r e left w i th s h o u l d n ' t b e a m i l l o n
m i l e s a w a y f r o m the p i t c h f o r GMT.
L i ke a l l the b e s t l o w b u d g e t B r i t i s h
m o v i e s , the cas t is p a c k e d w i th u n k n o w n s
a l o n g s i d e the o c c a s i o n a l r e c o g n i s e d f a c e
w h i c h p r o v o k e s a n a u t o m a t i c " w h a t the he l l
a r e they d o i n g t h e r e " r e s p o n s e . In th is c a s e ,
tha t r e s p o n s e w i l l u n d o u b t e d l y a p p l y to the
m u s i c a l c a m e o s o n s h o w , w i th H i n d a H i c k s
a r r i v i n g a s the g r o u p s v o c a l i s t a r o u n d h a l f
w a y t h r o u g h the m o v i e , a n d M e r c u r y M u s i c
Pr ize w i n n e r Ta l v i n S i n g h p u t t i n g in a s t r a n g e -
ly o u t of p l a c e a p p e a r a n c e in the last f ew
m i n u t e s . H a r d l y A l ist , a d m i t t e d l y , but a c l e a r
p o i n t e r to the rea l s t r e n g t h of the m o v i e - i t 's
m u s i c . J a z z j u n g l e m a y w e l l no t b e y o u r t h i n g
(is it a n y b o d y ' s ? ) b u t t h e h a u n t i n g , a l
e n v e l o p i n g s o u n d t r a c k is h a r d to f o r g e t o r
d i s m i s s eas i l y . M o r e o v e r , a s the b o d y of the
cas t cons i s t s en t i re l y of n e w c o m e r s y o u ' r e
a l l o w e d to b e l i e v e tha t the a c t o r s t h e m s e l v e s
a r e p e r f o r m i n g in f ron t of y o u ( i n d e e d that
m a y w e l l be the t ruth) . C o n s e q u e n t l y , the t r a -
d i t i o n a l f a i r y t a l e r ide f r o m o b s c u r i t y to m a s -
s ive l ive sets a n d a l b u m d e a l s is s u r p r i s i n g l y
b e l i e v a b l e a n d r e a l i s t i c , a v o i d i n g the
e x t r e m e l y c l i c h e d a p p r o a c h tha t y o u a u t o -
m a t i c a l l y e x p e c t w i th m o v i e s of this t ype .
A n d so to the m o v e itself . H a l f - a - d o z e n
k i d s f r o m v a r y i n g S o u t h L o n d o n b a c k g r o u n d s
( l one j u n k i e p a r e n t s , b r o k e - b u t - l o v i n g p a r -
en t s , the r i ch k i d , the t o k e n b l a c k guy.. . ) f i n -
ish s c h o o l in tent o n m a k i n g it b i g . A f ew yea r s
l a t e r we r e j o i n t h e m , a l itt le o l d e r , no t m u c h
w ise r , a n d not m u c h f u r t he r t h r o u g h the i r
c a r e e r s . H o w e v e r , the r e a l i s a t i o n that l i fe is
c a t c h i n g u p wi th t h e m - a n d u l t i m a t e l y a t r a g -
ic a c c i d e n t - s p u r t h e m in to a c t i o n , r e s u l t i n g
in the u s u a l s e l e c t i o n of m a k i n g u p , b r a k i n g
u p , f i gh ts a n d a r g u m e n t s . A n d as they s l i d e in
a n d ou t of the p r o t e c t i v e e n v i r o n m e n t of the
g r o u p ( and the f r i e n d s h i p s i n e x t r i c a b l y l i n k e d
to it) so the i r l i ves c o m e t o g e t h e r o r f a l l
a p a r t .
It's c e r t a i n l y d i f f e r e n t t o m o s t o t h e r gr i t ty
Brit f l i c k s y o u ' v e s e e n r ecen t l y , e m b o d y i n g a n
i n t e r e s t i n g a t t e m p t t o r e v i v e the m u s i c a l
(g i ven a d e c e n t m a r k e t i n g c a m p a i g n b a s e d
a r o u n d the s o u n d t r a c k a l b u m it m i g h t just
wo rk ) yet i t 's a l s o f a i r l y p r e d i c t a b l e a n d
g e n e r i c . T h e s to r i e s m i g h t b e t o l d in a d i f f e r -
ent way , bu t t h e y ' r e st i l l t h e s a m e s t o r i e s . T h e
c h a r a c t e r s w e a v e in a n d o u t of e a c h o t h e r s
l ives in a nea t l y o r c h e s t r a t e d way , yet the i r
i n d i v i d u a l d e s t i n i e s a r e n e v e r r e a l l y in d o u b t .
A n d o f c o u r s e , th is b e i n g a b a n d m o v i e ,
t h e r e ' s o n l y r ea l l y o n e p o s s i b l e e n d i n g . . .
S o w h a t ' s left? A very w e l l m a d e m o v i e
f o r s u r e . T h e cas t p r o b a b l y a r e n ' t d e s t i n e d f o r
g r e a t t h i n g s ( m u s i c a l c a m e o s a s i d e ) , bu t the
d i r e c t o r c e r t a i n l y h a s p o t e n t i a l . G M T c e r t a i n -
ly h a s the a b i l i t y t o i m m e r s e y o u in a f o r m o f
m u s i c w h i c h y o u p r o b a b l y w o u l d n ' t n o r m a l l y
g o o u t of y o u r w a y to l i s ten to - a n d wh i l s t
tha t m a y u l t i m a t e l y b e i t ' s d o w n f a l l at the bo x
o f f i c e , it d o e s g r e a t c r e d i t to the d i r e c to r . Yet
u l t i m a t e l y th is just l e a v e s y o u l o o k i n g f o r a
g r e a t m o v i e to g o a l o n g s i d e the s o u n d t r a c k
a n d , s a d l y , t h a t ' s w h a t G M T s q u a r e l y re fuses
to de l i v e r .
1 m 9
I
Analyze This
Starring: Robert de Niro, Bill Crystal, Lisa Kudrow
Director: Harold Ramis
ft
Ro b e r t D e N i r o ' s status a s a s c r e e n i c o n is
l o n g s i n c e a s s u r e d - there mus t be c o u n t -
less s t u d e n t h o u s e h o l d s a r o u n d the
w o r l d a d o r n e d wi th the m a n i c a l l y g r i n n i n g
i m a g e of Travis B i c k l e i n q u i r i n g if w e a r e ,
ra ther unwise ly , l o o k i n g at h i m . H o w e v e r , it
seems that the f ire in the bel ly o f the you th fu l
D e N i r o r e s p o n s i b l e f o r his in tense s c r ee n
p r e s e n c e has d w i n d l e d to b a r e l y a s m o l d e r , as
he s e e m s con t en t to p h o n e in p e r f o r m a n c e s in
pretty u n d e m a n d i n g ( and very lucrat ive ) ro les
a n d s c a r p e r w i th a fat c h e q u e . W h y e lse d i d he
b o t h e r with W a g the Dog o r Ron/'n? B o b b y f ans
wi l l r e j o i c e , t h e n , a s Analyze This f ea tu res the
m a n in t o p f o r m - a l b e i t in a s l ight ly u n e x p e c t -
e d r o l e .
T h o u g h h is bes t k n o w n p e r f o r m a n c e s
s h o u l d be f i l ed u n d e r p a i n s t a k i n g m e t h o d
r e a l i s m , he has o c c a s i o n a l l y s t r ayed in to the
r e a l m of c o m e d y , n o t a b l y with the h i l a r i o u s
Midnight Run. H i s la test f i lm f inds h i m a i m i n g
fo r l a u g h s o n c e a g a i n , t h o u g h t r a d i n g heav i l y
o n his i m a g e as e v e r y o n e ' s f a v o u r i t e m a f i a
h a r d m a n .
H e p lays Pau l V i t t i , h e a d of a N e w York
c r i m e f am i l y a n d a m a n u s e d to i n s p i r i n g f e a r
in his f r i ends a n d e n e m i e s a l i k e . N o t rea l l y a
ne r vous in t rospec t i ve c a n d i d a t e fo r p s y c h o -
a n a l y s i s , but w h e n the p ressu re of o u t m a n e u -
v e r i n g his r iva l m o b s t e r s b e g i n s to c a u s e a n x i -
ety a t t a c k s , he is f o r c e d to seek the he lp of a
psych ia t r i s t . The re luc tan t sh r ink , D r Ben S o b e l
( p l ayed by a n in f o r m Billy Crysta l ) r ap id l y has
to get used to his new pa t i en t ' s hab i t of tu rn-
ing up with a b o d y g u a r d a n d a g u n ra ther
t han a n a p p o i n t m e n t , a n d very s o o n his p r i -
vate life is a f f e c t e d . M o s t notab ly , his f i a n c e e
(Lisa K u d r o w , o f f e r i ng up a p e r f o r m a n c e w h i c h
c o u l d p r o b a b l y have b e e n c o b b l e d t o g e t h e r
f r o m a s e l e c t i o n of Friends ep i sodes ) ce r ta in l y
isn ' t t o o k e e n o n Ben c o n s o r t i n g with m e m b e r s
of the c r i m i n a l u n d e r w o r l d .
C r u c i a l l y , the o n s c r ee n p a i r i n g of D e N i r o
a n d C r y s t a l is a h u g e s u c c e s s , bo th expert ly
h a n d l i n g the o n e l iners a l o n g with the d e v e l -
o p m e n t of the i r u n u s u a l d o c t o r / p a t i e n t r e l a -
t i o n s h i p . This is the w o r k of two maste rs of
the i r craf t h i t t ing t o p f o r m a n d b o u n c i n g off
e a c h o t h e r - a n d thus the result is neve r in
d o u b t . T h o u g h the p lo t l o o k s a little f l imsy at
t i m e s , the jokes a re the sort w h i c h m a k e y o u
l a u g h ou t l o u d - a n d isn't that the mos t e f f ec-
tive f o r m of t h e r a p y ?
Simon
I
I
Competition
Analyze This
Ne w to L o n d o n ? T h e n y o u w i l l s o o n
f i n d o u t h o w e x p e n s i v e the c i n e m a is
o n w e e k e n d s . But f e a r n o t ! T h e k i n d
p e o p l e at the K e n s i n g t o n O d e o n (at the f a r
e n d of H i g h S t ree K e n s i n g t o n - the N o 9 , 1 0
a n d 4 9 b u s e s s t o p r i g h t o u t s i d e ) h a v e
t e a m e d up wi th us to g i v e a w a y f ive pa i r s o f
t i cke ts to see A n a l y z e Th i s f o r f r e e .
To w i n a p a i r o f t i c ke t s , a l l y o u h a v e to d o
is w o r k o u t the a n s w e r to the f o l l o w i n g s i m -
p le q u e s t i o n :
w
d
E m a i l y o u r a n s w e r to f i l m . f e l i x @ i c . a c . u k .
E n t r i e s m u s t a r r i v e b e f o r e m i d d a y next
W e d n e s d a y (the 6 th ) . W i n n e r s n a m e s w i l l be
p r i n t e d in next w e e k ' s e d i t i o n of Fe l ix .
sH a v e y o u r e a d the r e v i ews a n d t h o u g h t 'I c a n
d o be t te r t h a n tha t ! ' ? T h e n p r o v e it. C a l l in to
the Fe l ix o f f i c e a n d a sk f o r H e l e n .
n x
FELIX
1 E N •
i s
y
R u g b y W o r l d C u p
E n g l a n d v Italy l ive in
d a V i n c i ' s f r o m 5 p m .
W e l c o m e N i g h t
8 p m - l a m ( m i d -
n i g h t b a r ) . G i v e -
a w a y s , c h i l l o u t
r o o m a n d d a n c e
f l oo r . F ree entry t o a l l
a n d sundry .
E y
L i v e F o o t b a l l
W a t c h C h e l s e a t a k e
o n M a n U in dBs o r
d a V i n c i ' s . K i ck off
4 p m
J a z z N i g h t
Ge r r y LeStrange trio
live in dBs f rom 8-
1 0 : 3 0 p m , with eock-
tait bars Free : :eniry.
V y
F r e s h e r s Ba l l
The U n i o n g o e s ret ro ,
w i th C a r w a s h a n d
The B i k in i B e a c h
B a n d , p lus
l a s e r q u e s t , T h a '
B o m b , cock ta i l s a n d
Sony g i vaways .
9 p m - 2 a m ( l a m
bar) , Entry £7 (free
with Entscard) .
Want to see your clubs detai ls listed here? A l l
you have to do is ema i l the date , venue and
t ime of your meet ings or events to
fe l ix@ic .ac .uk. Don' t forget to indicate
whe ther it's a week ly event or a one-off.
N y I
C o m e d y
A l M u r r a y l i ve o n
s tage f r o m 8 p m . £ 6
(free with Entscord)
S T A T r i v i a
W i n £50 o r a crate of
lager. Starts p m .
B f r e e
A lcoho l free ents. 8 p m .
F r e s h e r s F a i r
2 5 0 - o d d c l ubs p lus
two d o z e n c o m p a n i e s
p i tch the i r stal l a n d try
to lure you into the i r
s h a d o w y w o r l d .
A c r o s s the Sou th Ken
c a m p u s f r o m 2 p m -
ful l m a p s a n d de ta i l s
in s u p p l e m e n t a r y s e c -
t ion
C o m m o n P e o p l e
T rad i t iona l W e n e s d a y
n igh t f a y r e in d B s
f r o m 9 p m - l a m
( m i d n i g h t ba r ) . £1
(free with Entscard)
O S C D i s c o
O v e r s e a s Societie W e l -
c o m e d isco . Free tick-
ets at Freshers Fair.
S p o r t s T r i a l s
H o c k e y , f o o t b a l l a n d
r u g b y p loye r s g a t h e r
in Beit Q u a d at m i d -
d a y for first t r a i n i n g
a n d tr ia ls s e s s i o n of
the year . Turn u p fo r
y o u r f ree i n t r o d u c -
t ion to the w i n d s w e p t
d e l i g h t s o f H a r l i n g -
t o n .
c
i
TV .' � -
s
R o n n i e S c o t t ' s
C h a r i t y G a l a
A qua l i t y l i ne-up
a s semb l e s at the Bar-
b i c a n . Very pr icey -
check for returns.
A n a l y z e T h i s
D e N i r o a n d Crys ta l
return to fo rm with this
ta le of a m a f i a h i tman
a n d his shr ink. It's not
h a r d to g u e s s w h o
plays w h o .
M a t c h o f t h e D a y
B B C 1 , 1 0 : 3 0 p m
S o m e h o w , despi te n o
live footba l l a n d no
Des , the BBC still have
the best cove rage . . .
D e s i g n i n g i n t h e
D i g i t a l A g e
Part icu lar ly we l l suit-
e d to IC students as
it 's bo th g eek y a n d at
the V & A . Free to stu-
dents
G o
O n e of the year ' s most
highly p ra i sed mov ies
consists of three inter-
l inked ta les, d i rected
by D o u g " S w i n g e r s "
L iman .
C h e l s e a v M a n U
Sky Spo r t s , 4 p m
It's C h e l s e a ' s last
c h a n c e to s top Un i t ed
w r a p p i n g u p the title
by C h r i s t m a s .
C a n d i d e
Three hours of m u s i -
ca l Vo l ta i re ? I think
I'll pass on that o n e .
H i g h qual i ty N a t i o n a l
T h e a t r e p r o d u c t i o n ,
£10 - 1 5 .
E l e c t i o n
M a t h e w B roder i ck a n d
Reece W i t h e r s p o o n
star in this a c c l a i m e d
ta le o f a n o - m o r a l s
h igh s c h o o l brat a n d
her teacher.
J e r r y S p r i n g e r U K
Jerry visits L o n d o n
a n d offers a few les-
s o n s in the art of
i n s i g h t m e n t to r iot
a n d street f ight ing.
Pos t I m p r e s s i o n s
Surely a s h o w at the
Brit ish L ibrary ent i t led
" T h e ar t of the
s t a m p " can ' t poss ib l y
b e m i s s e d ? U n s u r -
pr is ingly f ree .
T h e B e t a B a n d
H o w little is there on
this week? So little that
this is probab ly the best
on offer Ham m ers m i th
Palais, £12.50
S o u t h P a r k
If you love South Park
e n o u g h to actua l l y be
a b l e to sit t h rough an-
h o u r - a n d - a n - h a l l of
Kenny, C a r t m a n et a l ,
you ' l l love it.
T h e M a r k T h o m a s
P r o d u c t
C h a n n e l 4 , 1 1 : 0 5 p m
M r T h o m a s returns to
scare the hell out of
'the establ ishment ' .
G u m b o o t s
Six guys f r o m S o w e t o
d a n c i n g l ike c r a y
w e r e a s m a s h at
E d i n b u r g h . N o w
they ' r e at the Lyric
Thea t r e . £10 .
B r y a n A d a m s
W e m b l e y A r e n a plays
host to yet a n o t h e r
e ven ing of lift mus i c
c lass ics . Tickets f r om
£ 2 5
E y e s W i d e S h u t
Sadly , not up to any-
th ing y o u ' d expect - n o
K u b r i c k g e n i u s , n o
C r u i s e c h a r i s m a a n d ,
shock ing ly , n o p o r n . A
real s h a m e .
A l l y M c B e a l
C h a n n e l 4 , 1 0 p m
Is there any c h a n c e
of a c h a r a c t e r w h o
c o u l d be d e s c r i b e d
as " n o r m a l " ? N o .
A l f r e d H i t c h c o c k &
C o n t e m p o r a r y A r t
The M u s e u m of M o d -
ern A r t ' s n ew show,
d e s c r i b e d as
" t e d i o u s " by T i m e
O u t . £1 .50
1 n
D A Y y
Cabaret
Tickets £3.
A lcoho l free ents in the
Concer t Ha l l .
T h e H a u n t i n g
Q u i t e p o s s i b l y the
least scary h o r r o r
m o v i e m a d e in the
nineties. But then wha t
d o you expect f rom the
d i rector of S p e e d 2 ?
T h e S o p r a n o s
C h a n n e l 4 , 1 Opt
<_ruely ovc
the Emmv
D e r R o s e n k a v a l i e r
J o n a t h a n M i l l e r ' s
reworks S t rauss ' b i t-
ter-sweet c o m i c
o p e r a at the E N O .
Thurs & M o n 6 : 3 0 .
£2 .50 - £50 .
F r e s h e r s C a r n i v a l
' C a r n i v a l of the
Bizarre ' with fire eaters,
s n a k e c h a r m e r s etc,
plus serious tunes in
the C o n c e r t Ha l l , c a s i -
no in the g y m , ka raoke
in the U D H a n d
cheese in dBs. 9 p m -
2 a m . £7 (free with
entscard).
S t a n d a r d U n i o n l i ne-
u p ge ts u n d e r w a y ,
e s d a y a n d m d a y ,
p lus the STA b a r qu iz
o n Tuesday a n d the
t r a d i t i o n a l c o c k t a i l s
o n T h u r s d a y n i g h t .
C h e c k next w e e k ' s
Fu l l p r o g r a m m e of
sports a n d soc iet ies
activity gets u n d e r w a y
- con tac t you r c l u b
ch a i r / c a p t a i n .
Full f ixtures for the
new s e a s o n wi l l (ULU
a n d B U S A permit t ing)
a p p e a r in next w e e k ' s
Felix.
N e t a i d
event
spent.
idon leg
t chairty
135 well
T h e G e n e r a l ' s A m e r i c a n P i e
D a u g h t e r
We l l m a d e
ing) po tbo ik
Mass i v e in the Sttes,
b e c a u s e it
m a n a g e s to f ind a
new level of
l a rge l y
m a n a c
w h o l e
lowest c o m m o n
denomina to r . Sick.
B u f f y
Sky O n e , 8 p m
H o w d o e s s o m e t h i n g
with D o c t o r W h o style
s p e c i a l effects m a n -
a g e to d o so we l l ?
V a n D y c k
R o y a l
s n o w s a re a l w a y s
impress i ve a n d wel l
o r g a n i s e d , a n d f o r
o n c e ' s no t t o o
pricey. £5 .40
Spor t , spor t & m o r e
spor t cou r t esy o f the
R u g b y W o r l d C u p ,
c o u n t l e s s f o o t b a l l
c o m p e t i t o n s a n d lots
of U S spor t o n C 5 .
N e w seasons ac ross
the b o a r d as gal ler ies
a n d theatres g e a up
for the i r m i l l e n i u m
runs . Expect m u c h
Y 2 K i n sp i r ed n o n -
sense to be unve i l ed .
NoteWeek One : The Basics
We l come to the first in a new
series of Felix c o o k i n g
c o l u m n s . I'm g o i n g to
attempt the imposs ib le - to provide
someth ing for everyone. C o o k i n g
really is easy. To prove the point, this
c o l u m n will bui ld up slowly, reach ing
a full roast before Chr i s tmas .
For most c o o k i n g , you only
need a few simple rules. In the Basic
Skill sect ion I intend to cover a smal l
step a l ong the way each week. The
M e a l S u g g e s t i on wil l then g ive
instructions for m a k i n g a who l e
m e a l , w i thout us ing any th ing
beyond the skills covered so far. For
the more adventurous, there will
a lso be a n A d v a n c e d Tip conta in ing
a n interesting idea or technique.
The Basic Skill
Boiling Water
To start off, this is a really bas ic but
very important ski l l . First, a few
words abou t pans. Obv ious ly , the
main distinction is between non-stick
and ordinary. For the nov ice , n o n -
stick is probably the best cho i ce ,
a l t hough there a re s o m e things
which are difficult to d o with a n o n -
stick pan (eg ach iev ing a g o o d g o l d -
en brown finish). The other impor-
tant characteristic is the thickness of
the base - in genera l , pans shou ld
have a moderate ly thick base .
C o n t r o l l i n g the t empe ra tu r e
under a pan is on e of the most
important skills to learn. If the heat is
too great, f o o d will burn , or c o o k
unevenly. If the heat is t oo low, you
may not get the f o o d hot e n o u g h for
the desired effect. The key to most
tasks is to vary the temperature.
W h e n boi l ing a pan of water,
start by turning the heat up as far as
possible. Loads of heat is required at
first to raise the temperature of the
water. As a genera l rule, you shou ld
never turn the heat so high that gas
f lames o r an electric g l ow are visible
round the edge of the p a n . W h e n
the water is bo i l i ng , a d d the f o o d
you want to bo i l . You will still need to
heat the pan fairly ha rd , because
now the f o o d needs to be raised in
temperature. At the point where the
water is bo i l ing , with the f o o d in the
p a n , you will need to lower the t e m -
perature, so that a m o u n t of heat
app l i ed matches the heat wh ich is
be ing lost. In this way the pan will
bo i l gently, without so m u c h e v a p o -
ration that the pan may boi l dry.
Meal Suggestion
Pasta with Pesto
Pasta is great. It is easy to c o o k , full
of energy, a n d c a n be really cheep -
a n d you don't necessari ly have to
m a k e a comp lex sauce to g o with it.
Pesto is the genera l n a m e for a
paste, m a d e with ol ive o i l , gar l i c ,
a n d either hard cheese o r nuts. You
can buy a bas ic green basi l pesto in
a jar, f rom supermarkets . M a n y
shops a lso sell red pesto, which has
a d d e d toma to . You c a n mix pesto
straight in with pasta , for a g o o d
va lue , tasty m e a l .
Boi l the pasta as desc r ibed
a b o v e , a d d i n g a p inch of salt to the
water. After the pasta has been
c o o k e d for the t ime speci f ied on the
packet , d ra in the p a n . If poss ib le ,
a d d s o m e butter of ol ive oi l to the
p a n , and mix into the pasta . Finally,
s imply stir in a b o u t a t ab l e spoon per
person of pesto.
Advanced Tip
Rosemary and Stilton Pesto
Rosemary a n d stilton c o m b i n e really
well in a pesto wh ich is idea l with for
pas ta , stuffing m u s h r o o m s , o r tick-
ing u n d e r the skin of c h i c k e n
breasts. M a k i n g pesto is great fun -
I'm sure there a re scientific ways of
d o i n g it, but I normal l y just shove al l
the ingredients in a blender. Just be
careful not to over-blend the stilton.
It is idea l to use on e of those
mini f ood processors , o r a h a n d
b lender with an enc losed a t tach-
ment. For two peop l e , b lend the f o l -
l ow ing , until s m o o t h :
5 0 g Pine Kernels (or Cashews)
3 t ab l espoons O l i v e O i l
1 large c h o p p e d gar l ic c love
a smal l c l u m p of fresh rosemary
a few drops of l emon juice
salt a n d peppe r
To f in ish, c h o p 6 0 g of stilton into
smal l chunks , then a d d to the pesto.
B lend for a further 1 0 seconds .
2 s x
Exploation Society FRISBEE 99
N i g e l T h a c k e r a n d S i m o n
H i c k s l ed the i r f irst m a j o r e x p e d i -
t i on this s u m m e r to P a k i s t a n w i th
f o u r o t h e r I C s t u d e n t s . W h a t f o l -
lows is the i r r epo r t o f a very s u c -
cess fu l v e n t u r e .
D i a r r h o e a , a l t i t u d e , f o o d p o i s o n -
i n g , i o d i n e , b l i z z a r d s , g l a c i e r s , b i g
r i ve rs ; s u m m e r m u s t h a v e a r r i v e d
a n d m a n y h a v e f o u n d t h e m s e l v e s
yet a g a i n o n E x p e d i t i o n . A n d so it
w a s f o r the six o f us a s w e set o f f
in to P a k i s t a n .
E ve r y th i ng w e n t w e l l o n o u r
d e p a r t u r e f r o m L o n d o n , a n d
I s l a m a b a d s o o n l o o m e d u p o n u s ;
w e r e a l i s e d h o w m u c h f a i th w e
h a d put in o u r Tour A g e n t s ; w e
h o p e d they w o u l d be t h e r e !
A t 3 a m o u r first m o v e t o o k us
to a s m a l l h o t e l in R a w a l p i n d i , the
o l d e r c i ty n e i g h b o u r i n g I s l a m -
a b a d . H e r e o u r g u i d e r e c o m -
m e n d e d w e wa i t t i l l t he f o l l o w i n g
m o r n i n g to c a t c h the for ty m i n u t e
f l ight u p to S k a r d u , bu t n o ! W e
we re f a r to k e e n . W a i t twenty f o u r
h o u r s in o n e p l a c e ! D i d t hey t h i nk
we w e r e m a d ? P e r h a p s fat lazy
A m e r i c a n s ? N o , w e w e r e y o u n g
e a g e r s t u d e n t s a n d c e r t a i n l y
we ren ' t g o i n g t o s t a n d st i l l f o r a
day . I n s t e a d w e m a n a g e d t o
n e g o t i a t e a bus f o r i m m e d i a t e
d e p a r t u r e u p o n the twenty f ive
h o u r d r i v e at 3 5 c e n t i g r a d e a l o n g
the K a r a k o r a m H i g h w a y . I th ink
w e w e r e d o u b l y c h u f f e d not to
h a v e to p a y ext ra fo r this s u c c e s s .
Twenty e i g h t h o u r s later, a n d
p r o b a b l y a s m a n y l itres in swea t ,
w e a r r i v e d in S k a r d u . The s cene r y
h a d b e e n q u i t e f a n t a s t i c w i th
s h e e r d r o p s of 1 0 0 0 m , to be
f o u n d o n l y in the g r e a t e r r a n g e s ,
a n d w e felt w e h a d g o t to k n o w
the c o u n t r y a l itt le. S t i l l , a f ter fifty
h o u r s in t rans i t o u r e ag e r- s tu den t
o u t l o o k w a s f l a g g i n g , a n d w e
w e r e p e r h a p s b e g i n n i n g to jo in
the A m e r i c a n c a m p . I n d e e d o u r
next ho te l w a s fu l l o f exac t l y the
a f o r e m e n t i o n e d A m e r i c a n s , a n d
we f i t ted in f i ne .
The trek (wh ich in te res t ing ly is
a l w a y s i n t e r c h a n g e a b l e f o r
" a d v e n t u r o u s w a l k " ) wen t w e l l ,
c o v e r i n g a m a z i n g l y c h a o t i c i ce
f i e lds b e f o r e e m e r g i n g o n t o the
' i c e h i g h w a y ' o f the B i a f o G l a c i e r .
W e h a d o p t e d to a l l o w p lenty o f
t i m e so a s to b e a b l e to b e a b l e to
c l i m b s o m e m o u n t a i n s en- rou t e .
O u r d r e a m s h a d b e e n of l o n g
s n o w c o v e r e d r i d g e s that w e c o u l d
a s c e n d , p e r h a p s i ce-axe in o n e
h a n d , t o o u r g l o r y at m a y b e
7 , 0 0 0 m . Ins tead w e f o u n d m a n y
r o c k sp i r e s a n d s h e e r f a c e s that
p e r h a p s c o u l d b e c l i m b e d by
Br i t a in ' s best c l i m b e r s ; we w o u l d
h a v e t o g i v e it a f e w y e a r s .
D e s p i t e this d i s c o v e r y w e w e r e
p l e a s e d to m a k e s e v e r a l a s cen t s
u p to 5 8 8 2 m , c l a i m i n g o n e
u n c l i m b e d p e a k a s " F r i s b e e
B r a k k " .
K a y a k i n g w a s a h u g e s u c c e s s
t o o with two m a j o r r i vers , the
S h y o k a n d the H u s h e b e i n g p a d -
d l e d a n d s w a m in l a r g e s e c t i o n s .
T h e w a t e r w a s very fast - p e r h a p s
3 0 m p h in p l a c e s - a n d p r o v e d
very p a i n f u l to t h o s e w h o s w a m .
O n e e p i c e n d e d in us l o s i n g a
b o a t a n d p a d d l e , t h o u g h the b o a t
w a s la ter r e c o v e r e d a n d w e c a r -
r i ed a s p a r e p a d d l e .
O t h e r h i g h l i g h t s o f the tr ip
i n v o l v e d s c e n i c to i l e t s i tes , a l m o s t
k i l l i ng H i ck s y (a l a r g e f a l l i n g ice-
b l o c k g r a z e d his he lmet ) a n d the
r e v e l a t i o n tha t o u r staff h a d b e e n
t h r e a t e n e d with the s a c k s h o u l d
o u r g r o u p c o m p l a i n . S u r p r i s i n g l y
h i g h s t a n d a r d s f o l l o w e d !
M y f i n a l m e s s a g e f r o m this
e x p e d i t i o n w o u l d be that if y o u
w a n t to d o s o m e t h i n g , D O IT!!
H a d w e f o l l o w e d the we l l m e a n t ,
p r e - d e p a r t u r e a d v i c e f r o m the
m a n y ' e x p e r t s ' we s p o k e to we
s h o u l d not h a v e v i s i ted Pak i s t an
this y ea r ( F a b r i z i o ' s f r i ends h a d
b e e n sho t at p o i n t b l a n k o u t t he r e
last year ) , w e w o u l d c e r t a i n l y not
c l i m b a n y t h i n g ( Rob h a d h a d
extens i ve e x p e r i e n c e in the a r e a
a n d k n e w it w a s a l l t o o t e c h n i c a l ) ,
the por te rs w o u l d sure ly c o n us
(an i n e v i t a b l e a s p e c t o f the d i f f i -
cu l t p e o p l e in the a r ea ) a n d as fo r
c a n o e s , h u h ! , d o n ' t e v e n b o t h e r
p u t t i n g t h e m o n the p l a n e (every
r iver w i l l b e s t o p p e r e d to 1 5 m a n d
l e tha l ) . O f c o u r s e n o n e of these
p r o b l e m s p r o v e d t o o h a r d t o
o v e r c o m e , a n d wi th a little de t e r -
m i n a t i o n a n y e x p e d i t i o n c a n h a p -
p e n , a n d o u r s d i d .
M a n y t h a n k s t o C a s c a d e
D e s i g n s f o r w a t e r f i l t e r s a n d
The rm-a-Res t s , D a l l o z Fa l l P ro tec-
t i o n f o r Trol l a n d G r i v e l c l i m b i n g
g e a r , a n d B r i d g e d a l e 2 0 0 0 f o r
s u p p l y i n g the t e a m wi th s o c k s .
T h e e x p e d i t i o n w a s a p p r o v e d
by I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e ' s E x p l o r a t i o n
B o a r d , the D o r s e t E x p e d i t i o n a r y
Soc ie ty , a n d the Y o u n g E x p l o r e r s '
Trust o f the Roya l G e o g r a p h i c a l
Soc ie t y .
To f i n d o u t h o w t o j o i n a su i t-
a b l e e x p e d i t i o n o r l e a d y o u r o w n ,
c o m e a l o n g to the E x p l o r a t i o n
S o c i e t y ' s I n t r o d u c t o r y t a l k o n
T h u r s d a y 14 O c t o b e r at 1 2 : 3 0 ,
v e n u e T B A . S p e a k e r s i n c l u d e Prof.
B o b S h r o t e r f r o m ICs e x p l o r a t i o n
b o a r d , a n d S h a n e W i n s o r f r o m
the Roya l G e o g r a p h i c a l Soc ie ty ,
b o t h g i v i n g p r a c t i c a l a d v i c e o n
p l a n n i n g a n d f u n d i n g y o u r v e n -
tu re . If y o u a r e u n a b l e to a t t e n d ,
o r w o u l d l ike m o r e i n f o r m a t i o n
a b o u t the s o c i e t y ' s o t h e r l e c tu res ,
p l e a s e c o n t a c t N i g e l at
n i g e l . t h a c k e r @ i c . a c . u k .
To place an article about your society
contact David Roberts at felix@ic.ac.uk.
1 s 3
Pugwash Womens Football
P u g w a s h is a w e l l - k n o w n i n t e r n a -
t i o n a l o r g a n i s a t i o n ( w w w . p u g -
w a s h . o r g ) , c o n c e r n e d wi th g l o b a l
p r o b l e m s a n d s o c i a l a n d e t h i c a l
i s s u e s . It e n c o u r a g e s s c i en t i s t s
a n d e n g i n e e r s to t a k e r e s p o n s i b i l -
ity f o r the i r a c t i o n s . P u g w a s h a n d
its p r e s i d e n t J o s e p h R o t b l a t
r e c e i v e d the N o b e l P e a c e Pr ize in
1 9 9 5 f o r t h e i r e f fo r t s t o w a r d s
n u c l e a r d i s a r m a m e n t . T h e S t u -
den t P u g w a s h g r o u p is g u i d e d by
the g o a l s a n d p r i n c i p l e s o f " T h e
P u g w a s h C o n f e r e n c e s o n S c i e n c e
a n d W o r l d A f f a i r s " . It is c o n -
c e r n e d a b o u t the s o c i a l i m p a c t o f
s c i e n c e a n d s e e k s w ay s t o p r e v e n t
its m i s u s e . It is a l s o c o n c e r n e d
w i th r e d u c i n g t h e d a n g e r o f
a r m e d c o n f l i c t a n d s e e k s c o -
o p e r a t i v e s o l u t i o n s t o g l o b a l
p r o b l e m s , a n d t h e r e b y t r ies t o
ave r t the i m m i n e n t th rea t s t o c i v i l -
i s a t i o n .
T h e IC S t u d e n t P u g w a s h
g r o u p a i m s t o ra i se the a w a r e n e s s
o f o u r r e s p o n s i b i l i t y to h e l p to
r e d u c e a n d , w h e n p o s s i b l e , to
e l i m i n a t e the a c t u a l a n d p o t e n t i a l
h a r m f u l e f fects o f the sc ien t i f i c
a n d t e c h n o l o g i c a l r e s e a r c h a n d
d e v e l o p m e n t . W e a r e o r g a n i s i n g
events s u c h as l e c tu res , d i s c u s -
s i o n s , w o r k s h o p s a n d s e m i n a r s in
a r e a s l ike a r m s c o n t r o l , d i s a r m a -
m e n t ( p a r t i c u l a r l y w e a p o n s o f
m a s s d e s t r u c t i o n ) , , s u s t a i n a b l e
e n v i r o n m e n t a n d o t h e r e t h i c a l
i s s u e s . N o b e l P e a c e l a u r e a t e
J o s e p h Ro tb l a t w i l l g i v e the i n a u -
g u r a l l e c t u r e , a n d w o r k s h o p s o n
the f o l l o w i n g t o p i c s a r e env i s-
a g e d : m i l i t a r y r e s e a r c h at IC ,
a l t e r n a t i v e c a r e e r s , i n f o r m a t i o n
w a r f a r e , e n v i r o n m e n t a l i s s u e s ,
i n t e r n a t i o n a l s e cu r i t y , a r m s
e x p o r t , a n d e th i cs in s c i e n c e .
Fo r m o r e i n f o r m a t i o n o n the
I C U P u g w a s h g r o u p , o r if y o u
w o u l d l i ke to ge t i n v o l v e d with o u r
w o r k , p l e a s e c o n t a c t C a r s t e n
R o h r at c . r o h r @ i c . a c . u k o r c h e c k
o u t o u r w e b s i t e a t
w w w . s u . i c . a c . u k / p u g w a s h .
Women's footbal l at IC is about
fun, compe t i t i on and team
work. W e welcome anyone, no matter
what your nationality, discipl ine or
ability, and strive to accommodate any
enthusiastic player.
The team competes in the U niver-
sity of London league and cup com-
pet i t ion on Sundays, and in the
national British Universities Sports
Assoc ia t ion ( B U S A ) competit ion on
Wednesday afternoons. Last year we
reached the quarter finals of the
B U S A compet i t ion, and the year
before we lost on penalties in the
semi-final of the U L U cup. A l ongside
the main competit ions are a range of
five-a-side tournaments arranged by
other Universities which we also com-
pete in.
Moreover , we hope to d o even
better this year with the influx of more
medical and off-campus students into
what was previously a purely Imperial
team.
W e train once a week on M o n -
day nights with a qualif ied football
coach to prepare for the games.
Wednesday nights are when the wom-
ens team gets together in the bar to
talk tactics and encourage team bu i ld-
ing through our shared love of beer.
W e are also keen to maintain relations
with the men's club - we have joint
Christmas and Annua l Dinners, where
we get together to reminisce about
the seasons highs and lows.
So , when your course gets you
d o w n , and stress is at an all time high,
share the burden and take it out on
some other university on the footbal l
p i tch . If you love footba l l , fun and
frolics, join the womens football club
and enhance your time at Imperial
Co l l ege .
For more information on the club
find us at the Freshers Fair (you ' l l find
our stall in the M D H ) , turn up for
training at midday on W e d nesday, or
contact this y e a r s captain, A n n e
Kerr, at anne.kerr@ic .ac .uk . Results,
fixtures and loads more useful info can
also be found on our webs i t e :
www.su. ic .ac .uk/ladiesfootbal l .
SATURDAY 2ND 5PM RUGBY WOULD CUP
If
PLUS A CHANCE TO WIN CALDERS
& TETLEYS POLO SHIRTS ALL AFTERNOON
SUNDAY
����6
ICU
24 t x
Welcome to the Wide World of Sport In t rue n e w s p a p e r s ty le , th is b a c k
p a g e is r e s e r v e d f o r t h e m o s t e l e -
g a n t , d y n a m i c , p e r c e p t i v e r e p o r t -
ing e m e r g i n g f r o m I m p e r i a l C o l -
l e g e . Y e s , i t ' s t h e s p o r t p a g e s ,
a n d th is y e a r y o u c a n e x p e c t t o
see the resu l ts o f I m p e r i a l ' s f i nes t
c l u b s c h u r n i n g t h e i r w a y t h r o u g h
w h a t e v e r the m e d i o c r e U n i v e r s i t y
of L o n d o n t e a m s c a n t h r o w (or
k i c k , h i t , pass ) at t h e m . A g a i n .
T h e Br i t i sh U n i v e r s i t i e s S p o r t s
A s s o c i a t i o n c o m p e t i t i o n k i c k s off
o n W e d n e s d a y 1 3 t h O c t o b e r w i th
o u r M e n ' s F e n c i n g l o o k i n g t o
d e f e n d the i r B U S A C h a m p i o n s h i p
t i t le f r o m the l ikes o f O x f o r d a n d
L o u g h b o r o u g h . M e n ' s V o l l e y b a l l
m a y g o o n e bet te r this y e a r to
c l i n c h the tit le a f t e r r e a c h i n g the
f i n a l s last year. In the Un i v e r s i t y o f
L o n d o n l e a g u e s , M e n ' s F o o t b a l l
a r e l o o k i n g to d o the d o u b l e
a g a i n , w h i l e the Lad i e s t e a m a r e
sti l l s e a r c h i n g f o r t he i r f irst t i t le in
any c o m p e t i t i o n . W h a t e v e r y o u r
s p o r t , Fel ix w i l l b r i n g y o u the la t-
est r e su l t s , m a t c h r e p o r t s a n d
t e a m i n f o r m a t i o n o n M o n d a y
m o r n i n g s , f o r y o u r l e c tu r e t i m e
r e a d i n g p l e a s u r e .
M a t c h r epo r t s (in p l a i n E n g -
l i s h , o n p a p e r , not s c r a w l e d i l l e g -
ib ly o n the b a c k o f a b e e r mat)
a r e a l w a y s w e l c o m e o n a
W e d n e s d a y n i g h t . W e ' r e a l s o
l o o k i n g f o r e a g e r s p o r t s
r e p o r t e r s , p u n d i t s , s t a t i s t i c i a n s
a n d p h o t o g r a p h e r s , s o if y o u
f a n c y y o u r s e l f a s the next J o h n
M o t s o n , B a r r y D a v i e s , T r e v o r
B r o o k i n g o r M u r r a y W a l k e r
( p o t e n t i a l J i m m y H i l l ' s n e e d not
app l y ) a n d w a n t t o e x p e r i e n c e the
c o m b i n e d e x c i t e m e n t o f l ive spo r t
a n d a n e x p e n s e a c c o u n t d r o p
i n t o t h e o f f i c e o r e m a i l
f e l i x @ i c . a c . u k .
United stride away while Hakkinen nudges ahead
challengers falter at first of Irvine in race for title Football Formula One
O h dear . O n c e a g a i n Un i t ed a re
g o i n g to wa lk a w a y with every th ing ,
aren ' t they. W h a t l o o k e d like b e i n g
a relatively o p e n s e a s o n - a three
horse race at the very least - l ooks
like a fairly safe bet a l ready . T h e
Premiersh ip w o u l d s e e m to b e in
ser ious d a n g e r of tu rn ing into the
Scott ish Premier, with Un i t ed on ly
hav ing to turn up to w a l k a w a y with
the s i l verware , at least until A r s e n a l
c a n r e c a p t u r e the i r t r a d e m a r k
st inginess a n d a r r o g a n c e , C h e l s e a
c a n learn a little cons is tency , Leeds
c a n a f ford a c o u p l e of truly w o r l d
c lass p layers o r L i ve rpoo l c a n a f ford
to buy the o ther half of the c o a c h -
ing m a n u a l (the sec t i on o n d e f e n c e
wou ldn ' t g o amiss ) .
A l l we c a n real ly h o p e fo r n o w
is f o r s o m e t h i n g nasty to h a p p e n t o
D a v i d B e c k h a m , thus putt ing h i m
out for the rest of the s e a s o n a n d
spa r i ng us h a v i n g to h e a r the w o r d s
"this is def ini te ly B e c k h a m terr i tory"
every t ime the o p p o s i t i o n c o n c e d e
a free kick in their o w n half. M e a n -
whi le they ' re a lmos t certa in ly g o i n g
to be the only British t e a m m a k i n g
a n y p r o g r e s s in E u r o p e (unless
B o b b y Robson ' s m a g i c reaches new
he ights o r Spurs get lucky a n d
G i n o l a starts s h o w i n g off). O h we l l ,
at least Un i t ed can ' t w in the C u p
this s e a s o n . . .
Fu r ther d o w n the d i v i s i o n ' s ,
however , there ' s a m u c h m o r e inter-
est ing c h a l l e n g e in progress . I'm
ta l k ing a b o u t the eterna l quest to
ach i e ve the holy gra i l of League
F o o t b a l l . Af ter years of the Thi rd
D i v i s i o n effect ively b l o c k i n g any
p r o m o t i o n into the League , us ing
s t ad ium qual i ty as their just i f icat ion,
a l l the b ig C o n f e r e n c e teams now
have g r o u n d s that w o u l d d o the
League p r o u d . C o n s e q u e n t l y , f ou r
o r f ive years after first w inn ing the
C o n f e r e n c e , S t evenage f inal ly l o o k
l ike they ' ve got a decen t c h a n c e of
m o v i n g up into the heady w o r l d o
"rea l f o o t b a l l " . The fact that it might
be at the expense of O r i e n t just
m a k e s it even sweeter...
A s the 1 9 9 8 / 9 9 s e a s o n d r a w s to a
c l i m a x , the scene is set fo r a d r a -
ma t i c f in ish to both the Dr ivers a n d
C o n s t r u c t o r s c o m p e t i t i o n s .
D e f e n d i n g c h a m p i o n , F inn M i k a
H a k k i n e n , 3 1 , c l i n c h e d a vi ta l two
po in ts at last w e e k e n d s E u r o p e a n
G P in w h i c h D a m o n Hi l l e n d e d his
d i s s a p o i n t i n g s e a s o n in a f itt ing
m a n n e r in a n a c c i d e n t i n vo l v i ng
J a r n o Trull i a n d Rubens B a r r i c h e l l o
o n the first co rne r . The N u r b u r -
g r i ng in G e r m a n y m a d e fo r a n
exc i t i n g , a c t i o n p a c k e d r a c e with a
first p l a c e jinx s t r ik ing f o u r t imes .
W i n n e r J o h n n y He rbe r t t o o k a first
S t e w a r t - F o rd G P w i n a f t e r t i t le
c h a l l e n g e r s H e i n z - H a r a l d Frentzen
a n d D a v i d C o u l t h a r d ret i red in a
race p l a g u e d by i n c l e m e n t w e a t h -
er. I t a l i an G i a n c a r l o F i s i c h e l l a
s p u n ou t h a v i n g t a k e n first p l a c e
after C o u l t h a r d l o c k e d up af te r
o p t i n g to take his c h a n c e s in the
r a i n . In a race w h i c h s a w Ferrar i
p e r f o r m the worst pit s top of the
s e a s o n , l e a v i ng Edd i e Irvine l a n -
g u i s h i n g just o u t s i d e a po in ts p o s i -
t i o n , the re t i r ement of J a q u e s V i l l -
n e u v e c r e a t e d a n e w ba t t l e
b e t w e e n Irvine a n d H a k k i n e n fo r
6th p o s i t i o n - a n d a m u c h n e e d e d
c h a m p i o n s h i p p o i n t . H a k k i n e n
s p r u n g in to a c t i o n desp i t e r a c i n g
ha l f-hear ted l y fo r m u c h of the r a c e
f o l l o w i n g the s t r a t egy m i s t a k e s
o r i g i n a t i n g f r o m the M c C l a r e n
e n g i n e e r s . H a k k i n e n ' s first o v e r t a k -
ing a t t empt s a w h i m run off the
t rack , but a la te r m i s t ake by Irvine
as the p ressu re bu i l t up a l l o w e d
the F inn to t ake 6 th p o s i t i o n with
th ree l aps to g o .
W i t h t w o r a c e s t o g o , H a k k i -
nen n o w l e a d s the dr ivers c h a m p i -
o n s h i p by 6 2 p t s to Irvine's 6 0 p t s ,
with H e i n z - H a r a l d Frentzen sure ly
ou t o f the r u n n i n g in th i rd o n
5 0 p t s . The a c t i o n n o w m o v e s to
M a l a y s i a a n d J a p a n wi th a l l the
po ten t i a l f o r a n i n c r e d i b l y d r a m a t -
ic f in ish - it just r e m a i n s to be seen
h o w v i ta l t hose t w o po in t s turn ou t
to b e .