Why i loved, loathed and learned from facebook

download Why i loved, loathed and learned from facebook

of 74

Embed Size (px)

description

 

Transcript of Why i loved, loathed and learned from facebook

  • Love, Loathe And Learn Why I Loved, Then Loathed And Finally Learned From Facebook a real story
  • First I loved Facebook
  • I reveled in the attention,
  • and was engrossed in the gossips.
  • I used to enjoy seeing what others did or posting what I did,
  • You may call it stalking
  • or may be the love of self.
  • Yes, I loved my BIG ego.
  • I could say many things that I couldnt say on their face and yet go scot free
  • I was connected without really needing to meet or waste time.
  • I loved those surreal experiences and
  • was thrilled with my second world
  • I admired my own posts to no end,
  • and cherished the persona that I created for myself
  • Subtly but surely, Facebook became THE only reality.
  • I was addicted, and I would not admit.
  • My Facebook image larger than the real me and those shoes hard to fill
  • In real world and when I met real people, a false sense of familiarity overpowered the distance
  • Now, I started loathing myself
  • I saw that peoples opinions about me was not about me
  • I imagined that they saw me as a time waster
  • Even though I compromised 4+ hours of sleep each day
  • They saw me as jobless jack, or so I assumed.
  • They were probably calling me an egotist,
  • And I was getting increasingly uncomfortable with such notions
  • I was getting distant with myself, unable to accept that reality
  • Many a time, I saw them as intruding into my private life
  • At other times, I suspected that they were nonchalant
  • I felt terrible when people did not like my banal posts
  • I felt let down just because 299 friends wished on birthday. (I have all of 943 friends)
  • I started disliking their views and vice versa
  • I started reading too much into what they were posting
  • I made foes out of friends more because
  • I suspected that they knew me more than they should about me.
  • I started getting confused with my innate introversion and supposed exuberant extroversion.
  • There were conflicts with me and me
  • My many roles merged into one completely and a confused personality for all to see
  • I experienced incompleteness as everybody seemed to be doing awesome while my life seemed awful
  • Dreadful, hideous, repulsive, vile and upsetting to say the least
  • When I have nothing to write that day, I felt melancholic
  • No like in 4 hours was a misery, just as the wait for the next like or next comment was excruciating
  • Sleepless nights and sleeping pills wouldn't work
  • I snapped, slapped myself awake
  • And took a short Facebook Sabbath. I deactivated Facebook
  • And deleted the app from my phone and the iPad.
  • I started running sea ward and ran long distances, alone
  • Meditated by the beach, Rollerbladed on sidewalks
  • Prayed and started to discover the new me
  • That was in sync with me
  • And hence learned a few lessons
  • Facebook in itself was not bad. It was my own addiction
  • It was not how others saw me. It was how I thought they saw me.
  • They did not ignore me. They had placed importance to themselves.
  • Not that they didnt like me, they just took care of themselves.
  • The real world, real people were intact with their pristine goodness.
  • There still existed real meetings, real friends.
  • Online did not erase off-line identity. They coexisted.
  • There was a lot to learn and a lot more to unlearn.
  • So this is what I did
  • I slashed my friends list. All those not regularly adding value or making make me laugh had to go - unfollow or hidden.
  • I set a max limits on people. Less people, less content, less gossip, more time
  • I found a good reader app I use Flipboard to consolidate news and browse once a day for just 20 min.
  • I time boxed my online presence. I check Facebook only during breakfast, taxis or if I am waiting for some one.
  • I minimized the number devices Now my devices now serve specific functions
  • I deleted my phone app Just the way we remove junk food from the fridge to stick to a diet.
  • I turned to reliable content sources I followed useful content from professionals only on twitter, LinkedIn and tech blogs.
  • I use apps like Klout and Buffer to schedule sharing and wolfram alpha , retweet lab tell me on the good times to post.
  • The results are telling
  • Ive found myself refreshed, focused, and energetic.
  • I re-discovered the beauty of the world beyond inbox, newsfeeds and comments.
  • I was easy to love and loathe, it was arduous to step back, breathe in and to look at one self in the mirror.
  • And the journey continues #LifeIsOn #FullVolume
  • Love, Loathe And Learn Why I Loved, Then Loathed And Finally Learned From Facebook
  • By a President aspirant, amateur author, doting dad, experimental entrepreneur, passionate photographer, social media evangelist, tireless traveler, happenstance humanoid - Rajesh Soundararajan | @rajeshsound