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Transcript of Torah Times
The Torah TimesParshat Beshalach Copyright © 2012 The Torah Times ONE SHEKEL
“It’s What’sHappening!”
MIdBAr ZIN, IYAr 14-Members of the OppositionTeluna Party have issuednumerous complaints anddire warnings of grave foodemergencies and serious star-vation that are threateningIsrael.
“This so-called ‘exodus’ isgoing nowhere;it’s a dead end!How long canwe subsist on30-day old left-over Matzahcrackers? Youcan’t feed hun-gry people with mira-cles!” they complained.
The same oppositionparty had also protested,“Are there no graves inEgypt?” when Israel was atthe brink during the red Seacrisis three weeks ago.
“Our leaders are recklessand irresponsible,” com-plained Miss Lonen, an
Opposition leader. “Thiswhole “Exodus” conceptis a major mistake, run-ning out in utter hastewithout proper planninginto this deserted forsak-en place.
“Instead of just look-ing up to Heaven, we
need leaders who are downto earth!”
Watchamacallit?!Man oh Man! This watchamacallit (how else to
describe this strange stuff) leaves so much to be desired.The nondescript food makes me yearn for the good
old days, the fleshpots and zesty tastes of leek, garlicand onion.
The stuff goes bad in one day! No shelf life, no sav-ing grace, barely allowing you to live from one day tothe next, it gets all rotten and wormy by the next morn-ing.
Besides, the delivery is irregular and unreliable. Oneday you get one portion, the next day you get double,and the next day you get nothing!
Weren’t we promised daily delivery? I tried to findsomething to eat the day after Friday, but there wasn’t amorsel! All gone! This food is for the birds!
This spiritual stuff don’t agree with my system.Something’s obviously wrong when it stays in yourstomach, and you get no bowel movement.
It’s really so boring to keep on eating the same thingover and over again.
Manna in the morning, Manna in the evening,Manna at suppertime..."
criticFOOD by Miss Lonen
Torah Tops
for Education
Directions:
Instant, needs no prepa-
ration. Grind or cook if
necessary. Portion con-
trol. Follow instructions.
No Sabbath delivery.
One portion per personQuestions or comments?
Call 1-800-MOSHE Complaints? Call
1-800 I M NUDNIK
Exodus a Disaster!
Wood you believe?Marah’s
BITTERSWEETTREATED WATERAnother Heavenly Product, Unlimited
RECIPE CORNER
As You Like It!You don't need to be
a gourmet chef withfancy recipes, measuring cups, tsps, tbsps and those hard to getingredients. Be creative and
imaginative. Just thinkof the various possibilities,
depending on yourtaste. There's so
much to enjoy by hav-
ing the right attitude.
Wholesome &
nutritious,
assorted flavors.
Naturally honey sweet,
season to your taste.
Zin Zenet!
One Omer
No
Preservatives
added
HISTORICCOLLECTOR’S
ITEM!
Expirati
on Date:
1 Day A
fter Deli
very
This box helps you
think out of the box!
...the best to you each morning!
Heaven
ly!
A MIRACLE
product!
Preciou
s Stone
s
in spec
ial portio
ns!
FRESH DAILY!
Dual pa
cked to
preserve
freshn
ess.
Keep in
shade a
way
from sun
. HP
Nutrition Facts:Servings
2
Contents 1/10 efah
RDA 100%
Supernatural100%
Natural 0%
Waste 0%
Residue 0%
Has
hgac
haPratis Supervision
Special reporting by Dawson and Avi Ramm
Are there no
graves in
Egypt?
WOMAN IN THE NEWS:
MiriamBorn in a very bitter and
oppressive time, sweet littleMiriam had worked to save herbrethren many years ago, whenour Jewish leadership was still inits infancy.
Always optimistic, 'Big sister'Miriam was an enduring source ofstrength, confidence and hope,even when respected communalleaders had predicted gloom anddoom.
Her sense of Vision and fore-sight allowed Miriam to offer mar-ital advice to divorced couples;marriage counseling that helpedrepair many a broken family.
Her patient wait-and-see atti-tude stood by her when thingsdidn't seem to work out as hoped,when her predictions seemed togo down the drain. Her persist-ence allowed her to eventually seethe results of her efforts.
A dedicated mother’s helper,Miriam volunteered as a pediatricnurse in the maternity wards, car-ing for crying children and rock-ing them to sleep with soothinglullabies. She also served as a con-sultant/coordinator for adoptivemothers seeking a nurse for theirbaby.
This week, Miriam debuted asa talented composer with a nineword choreographed musical,playing and singing for womenaudiences.
Miriam is not afraid to expressherself, regardless of where thechips may fall. To this day, Miriamis responsible for a daily anti-Lashon Hora shiur for men andwomen.
When Miriam does something,she certainly does it well. A foun-tain of inspiration, she gushesforth with life wherever she goes,flowing with goodwill. All’s wellthat ends well.
Grace in Sea Major
This impromptu per-formance lacked the
usual concert accouter-ments: no advertise-ments, acoustics orauditions; no fancystage or grand cur-tains; no recitals orrehearsals; no phil-
harmonic orchestra orvirtuoso.
No memorizing notes, dexter-ity of players’ hands or fiddlingof the fingers.
Yet this spontaneous outpour-ing became a splashing success!What it lacked in physical equip-ment, it more than made up inspirit, culminating in a grandfinale.
Millions attended without Pror tickets or reservations. Insteadof paid performers, the audiencejoined in, with jubilant melodiessung from the heart.
Octwaves rising to a tri-umphant crescendo, liberationreverberated through young andold in a fervent and ecstatic syn-chronized chorus, flowingsmoothly, all on the same wave-length; joy and elation echoed bywave after wave of thunderousapplause engulfing the area.
Neatly arranged like alternatecourses, each stanza and sentencerepresenting an additional brick,rising higher and higher, formingtall columns of an imposing edi-fice.
Buoyant voices rising incadence drowned out the opposi-tion, as nature returned to fill thevoid.
The tambourine performancereflected years of preparation andpersistent practice, which helpedthe player stay in tune, ready forthat very special moment.
Special thanks to "The Birds"ensemble who flew in for the cel-ebration.
musical NOTESI Remember When...
Seaing Is Believing!By Shifcha Seymour
As a simple domestic maid, I’mvery flattered to share my specialview and perspective of the amaz-ing red Sea Crossing.
Let’s sea. I'm really not awriter, and I don’t have the spiri-tual insight, eloquence or prophet-ic perception of Ezekiel’s divineChariot, but this was really some-thing out of this world!
Billions of pails of water weresuddenly mopped up, that wewere able to walk right through!If only I could dry myfloors so easily!
Taking the plunge,crystal clear channels
offered fruits and gushed forthwith fresh water drink-ing fountains! Ecstatic,we broke into a joyoussing-a-long.O my G-d! The divine
spirit was actually palpable,you could feel it, l’pailmamash!
Sorry, that’s it for now.I must go back to
work, mop-ping up. You
can’t alwaysrely on miracles!
Side ASHIRA by the Sea
Upbeat Allegro tunes!#1 Top 10 Hit! Free! Divine! Wonderful!
Inspired! A rich Experience! Drowns out oppression!
Presented by:Moshe Rabenu: Solo
Children of Israel Choir: VoicePercussion: Miriam
High pitched vocals: BirdsFirst visuals: Children
Layout and design: Areach/LevanaSelections: -Az Yashir- Ashir- Azi- Zeh E-li-Mi Kamocha - Ad Yavor - Hashem yimloch-" Better than Ezekiel" - Maid's Review
Side BShirat DevorahUpbeat, Allegro tunes!#4 of the Top 10!
Ben Avinoam Presents...Shirat Devorah Songs of Victory!
Plus.. Top of Yael!Background: Nachal KishonMournful Blues: Aim Sisra
Special thanks to Zevulun & Naftali
Selections: Uri Uri- Ad Shakamti- LamaYashavta - Kol M'chazzim - Mini
Ephraim - Tzidkas Pirzono - T'vorachminashim - Zeh Sinai -
NEW RELEASE!
Jewish MusicThe NewWave
in• Free! • Free!Free! • Free!
#1 AMONG THETOP TEN SONGS!
Forward: by Nachshon B. Aminadav
FAITHFULRENDITION By Miriam Aarons and the Tambourines
Top Flight Accompaniment by
"The Birds" Main Act:
"Greatest Aquatic Show on Earth!"• 12 Channels
• Presenting: "Moses & The Sons of Israel"in Live Concert
• Spectacular Seanic Views• Original Cantorial
JEWISH WOMEN’S CIRCLE PRESENTS
TheTambourinesJoin the Miriamathon!
S I N G A L O N G P E R F O R M A N C E
At the Crossings, WaterburyFruit and Refreshments