PowerPoint Presentation

The Five Love LanguagesThe Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman

The Five Love LanguagesBy Dr. Gary Chapman

Jesus is Love...Father, help your children,And don't let them fall by the side of the road.Mmm, and teach them to love one another,And heaven might find a place in their hearts;'Cause Jesus is love.He won't let you down,And I know He's mine forever,Ah, in my heart.

We've got to walk on, walk on through temptation,'Cause His Love and His wisdom will be our helping hand.And I know the truth and His word will be our salvation.Lift up our heart to be thankful and glad'Cause Jesus is love.He won't let you down,And I know He's mine deep down in my soul.Jesus is love.

Four Types of LoveEros Love - Physical love expressed, attraction erotic - Song of SolomonStorge Love - Family love, love between a parent and child, sisters, brothers - Hannah & Samuel - 1 Samuel 1Philia Love - The love between friends - philanthropy, love of fellow man, love from the heart - 1 Samuel 18:1-5, David & JonathanAgape - Self-sacrificing, unconditional, without boundaries, regardless of the cost. God and Jesus - The Love of God, Luke 6:35, Romans 5:8, 1 Corinthians 13

Four Types of Love Continued...Consider this:The love between a husband and a wife should be, among other things, an erotic love. However, a long-term relationship based solely on eros is doomed to failure. The thrill of sexual love wears off quickly unless there are some philia and agap to go along with it. Retrieved from Got Questions.orgThis brings us to the Five Love Languages...

How Does God Define Love?Biblical Definition: 1 Corinthians 13: Long suffering, kind, does not envy, is not prideful, is not selfish, easily provoked, does not think of evil, rejoices in truth, bears, believes, hopes, and endures all things, etc...

What Are the Love Languages?

Words of Affirmation Quality Time Receiving Gifts Acts of Service Physical Touch

What Happens to Our Love for One Another?Quote from Mr. ChapmanOur dreams before marriage are of marital bliss; We are going to make each other supremely happy. Other couples may argue and fight, but not us. We love each other. Of course, we are not totally naive. We know intellectually that we will eventually have differences. But we are certain that we will discuss those differences openly; one of us will always be willing to make concessions, and we will reach agreement. Its hard to believe anything else when you are in love. p. 30

From In Love to Real LoveAnd now pursue real love with our spouse. That kind of love is emotional in nature but not obsessional. It is a love that unites reason and emotion. It involves an act of the will and requires discipline, and it recognizes the need for personal growth. Our most basic emotional need is not to fall in love but to be genuinely loved by another, to know a love that grows out of reason and choice, not instinct. I need to be loved by someone who chooses to love me, who sees in me something worth loving. p. 33(Italics and emphasis added)

So...What Exactly Are the Five Love Languages?Love Language #1Words of AffirmationVerbal compliments, or words of appreciation, are powerful communicators of love. They are best expressed in simple, straightforward statements of affirmation.Reference: Proverbs 18:21 - Amplified BibleDeath and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it and indulge it will eat its fruit and bear the consequences of their words.

How Do I Express Words of Affirmation? Record words of affirmation that you give your spouse each day Set a goal to give compliments each day Say I love you frequently Compliment your spouse in the presence of significant Look for their strengths and compliment them

So...What Exactly Are the Five Love Languages?Love Language #2Quality TimeIt means that we are doing something together and that we are giving our full attention to the other person. The activity in which we are both engaged is incidental. The important thing emotionally is that we are spending focused time with each other. The activity is a vehicle that creates the sense of togetherness.

What Does Quality Time Require?Focused AttentionQuality Conversation - involves sympathetic listening good listening skills, and body languageLearning to talk - Taking initiative, expressing feelings, willing to be vulnerable and transparentSharing Quality Activities a) At least one person wants to participateb) The other is willingc) Both of you know why you are doing it

How Do I begin? Designate specific times and places Ask your spouse what activities they enjoy Keep in touch throughout the day - text and/or photo Plan a getaway Make time during the day to share your events Do chores together Dream together

So...What Exactly Are the Five Love Languages?Love Language #3Receiving GiftsReference: For God loved the world in this way: He gave His One and Only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life. Gifts are a reminder of the love you share. Think about this...what did you receive on the day you were married?

Receiving Gifts Continued...A gift is something you can hold in your hand and say, Look, he was thinking of me, or, She remembered me. You must be thinking of someone to give him a gift. The gift itself is a symbol of that thought...it is not the thought implanted only in the mind that counts but the thought expressed in actually securing the gift and giving it as the expression of love.When you are a gift-giver, remember that you are making an investment into your relationship.

How Do I Get Started? Remember that the best gift is the gift of yourself Be creative, give a gift for 12 days Make a gift Keep a gift notebook of the items your spouse has expressed an interest in

So...What Are the Five Love Languages?Love Language #4Acts of ServiceReference: John 13:14-15 King James Version (KJV)14 If I then, your Lord and Master, have washed your feet; ye also ought to wash one another's feet.15 For I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you.Requests give direction to love, but demands stop the flow of love...Before marriage, we are carried along by the force of the in-love obsession. After marriage, we revert to being the people we were before we fell in love.

How Can I Serve My Spouse? Think about serving one of your spouses loved ones Ask your spouse how you could serve them best Surprise your spouse with a service act Allow your spouse to relax

So...What Exactly Are the Five Love Languages?Love Language #5Physical TouchHolding hands, kissing, embracing, and sexual intercourse are all ways of communicating emotional love to ones spouse...to the person whose primary love language is physical touch, the message will be far louder than the wordsin marriage, the touch of love may take many forms. The body is meant for touching. - Eros Love

Eros Love - How is it Expressed in Marriage? Kissing Hugging Foreplay Physical Intimacy Standing or sitting near Additional creative touching...

FYI - A Little ResearchDo you and your spouse argue more than you kiss? That seems to be the norm these days. Surveys show that the average married couple kisses four times a day and disagrees twice that often. And 1-in-5 couples go without kissing for as long as a week at a time. But the lack of affection can hurt your relationship. In fact, couples therapist Joel Block says its easy to strengthen your relationship just by kissing each other more often. Thats because kissing releases the brains bonding hormones dopamine and oxytocin. And holding a kiss for ten seconds instantly makes you feel more connected as a couple. And the benefits dont end there. Kissing also lowers levels of the stress hormone cortisol, which means locking lips with your sweetie helps both of you relax. And less tension means fewer disagreements. Retrieved from: Tesh.com

Remember 1 Corinthians 13? The Excellence of Love4 Love endures with patience and serenity, love is kind and thoughtful, and is not jealous or envious; love does not brag and is not proud or arrogant. 5 It is not rude; it is not self-seeking, it is not provoked [nor overly sensitive and easily angered]; it does not take into account a wrong endured. 6 It does not rejoice at injustice, but rejoices with the truth [when right and truth prevail]. 7 Love bears all things [regardless of what comes], believes all things [looking for the best in each one], hopes all things [remaining steadfast during difficult times], endures all things [without weakening].8 Love never fails [it never fades nor ends]. Amplified Bible

1 Corinthians 13 in the Message BibleLove never gives up.Love cares more for others than for self.Love doesnt want what it doesnt have.Love doesnt strut,Doesnt have a swelled head,Doesnt force itself on others,Isnt always me first,Doesnt fly off the handle,Doesnt keep score of the sins of others,

1 Corinthians 13 in the Message BibleDoesnt revel when others grovel,Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,Puts up with anything,Trusts God always,Always looks for the best,Never looks back,But keeps going to the end.

Discovering Your Primary Love Language

Your Turn!Lets take the quiz!

You may take the quiz online at:http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/couples/

Love that never fades...

Jesus Is LoveThe CommodoresLionel RichieLionel RichieGold: Lionel Richie/CommodoresR&B/Soul2006-01-10T08:00:00Zkytangela68@yahoo.com2015-11-11 14:00:41Gold: Lionel Richie/CommodoresUniversal:isrc:USMO10111078