Techniques For Empathetic Listening
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Transcript of Techniques For Empathetic Listening
Techniques for Empathetic
Listening
Rev. David Eisenmenger, MAMFTDirector of Education, Research and ProgrammingSignature HealthCARE, LLCSpirituality Pillar
Our Lives are Spent
Communicating• Study conducted
across a variety of
occupations
• Up to 70% of waking
time spent
communicating
Everything else
Communicating
How Much Time Do You
Spend?• Up to 70% of waking
time spent communicating
• Nearly 45% of communication time spent listening
• Conclusion: Listening is a key component to every aspect of our lives
Communicating
All other communicating
Listening
Hearing vs. Listening
Hearing• A physiological sensory process by which
sensations are received by the ears and transmitted to the brain
Listening• A psychological procedure involving interpreting
and understanding the significance of the sensory process
Listen: An Etymology
Derived from two Old English words:
Hlystan, “hearing”
Hlosnian, “to wait in suspense”
Attending Behaviors have four
components• Eye contact
• Body language
• Vocal qualities
• Verbal tracking
Eye Contact
• Get on the same level as the people you are speaking with
• Give enough eye contact…but not too much
• Most patients:– Will be comfortable with more eye contact when you’re
talking
– Less eye contact when they’re talking—but this can vary
• Cultures vary greatly in what is considered appropriate eye contact
Body Language
• Positive body language
• Leaning slightly toward the patient
• Maintaining a relaxed but attentive posture
• Mirroring
Vocal Qualities
• Refers to the tone and inflections of your voice
– Not the content of what you say, but how you say it
• For example: Pacing
– Moving slightly toward matching the patient’s vocal qualities
• You can also use your vocal qualities to lead the patient
Verbal Tracking
• Using your words to demonstrate accurate following
• Includes restating or summarizing
Too much of a good thing
• Positive attending behaviors can become negative or annoying if you use them too much
• Staring
• Leaning in
• Over tracking
Negative Attending Behaviors
• Infrequent eye contact
• Turning away from the patient
• Leaning back from the waist up
• Crossing your legs away from the patient
• Folding your arms
Individual and Cultural
Differences• Every patient is unique
• Listening behaviors to accommodate individuals
Following Skills
• Door openers
– Open-ended questions
– Going up at the end of your sentence
• Minimal encouragers
• Infrequent questions
• Attentive silence
Minimal Encourage
• Small words
– Convey that you are listening
– Offers an implied invitation to continue talking
Paraphrasing
• Summarize, repackage and return what
you hear
• Reflect the content
• Reflect the feelings
Secondary Emotions
• Tertiary Emotion: Relaxed
• Verbalization: “You have such a relaxing voice.”
• Secondary Emotion: Content
• Primary Emotion: Peaceful
Tertiary Emotions
• Tertiary Emotion: Embarrassed
• Verbalization: “I cant’ believe I did that. What an embarrassment.”
• Secondary Emotion: Insecure
• Core Emotion: Scared
Resources• Bolton, R. (1979). People skills. New York, NY: Simon
• Ivey, A., et al (1997). Basic attending skills. North Amherst, MA: Microtraining Associates
• Lanier, S. A. (2000). Foreign to familiar: a guide to understanding hot- and cold-climate cultures. Hagerstown, MD: McDougal Pub.
• Lipson, J. G., Minarik, P. A., & Dibble, S. L. (1996). Culture & nursing care: a pocket guide. San Francisco: UCSF Nursing Press.
• Wilcox, G. (Array). Feeling Wheel [ PDF ]. Retrieved from http://med.emory.edu/excel/documents/Feeling Wheel.pdf