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SMALL TALK

In most English-speaking countries, it is normal and necessary to make small talkin certain situations. Small talk is a casual form of conversation that breaks theice or fills an awkward silence between people. Even though you may feel shy

using your second language, it is sometimes considered rude t say nothing. Just asthere are certain times when small talk is appropriate, there are also certain topicsthat people often discuss during these moments.

WHO, WHAT, WHERE, WHEN, WHY?

WHO makes small talk?

People with many different relationships use small talk. The most common type ofpeople to use small talk are those who do not know each other at all. Though weoften teach children not to talk to strangers, adults are expected to say at least afew words in certain situations. It is also common for people who are only

acquaintances, often called a friend of a friend, to use small talk. Other peoplewho have short casual conversations are office employees who may not be goodfriends but work in the same department. Customer service representatives,waitresses, hairdressers and receptionists often make small talk with customers. Ifyou happen to be outside when the mailman comes to your door you might makesmall talk with him too.

WHAT do people make small talk about?

There are certain safe topics that people usually make small talk about. Theweather is probably the number one thing that people who do not know each otherwell discuss. Sometimes even friends and family members discuss the weather

when they meet or start a conversation. Another topic that is generally safe iscurrent events. As long as you are not discussing a controversial issue, such as arecent law concerning equal rights, it is usually safe to discuss the news. Sportsnews is a very common topic, especially if a local team or player is in a tournament

Polite Expression

In order to be polite when you are speaking English, you need to use these phrases correctly.

Excuse Me.

You say Excuse me when you want to go past somebody. You also say excuse me to somebodyyou do not know when you want to attract their attention.

Excuse me, could you tell me the way to the station?Excuse me, is anyone sitting here?

Sorry

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You say sorry when you need to apologize for something small:

Sorry I'm late.

I beg your pardon is a formal expression:

I beg your pardon! I must have picked up the wrong bag by mistake.

Sorry orI'm sorry is used frequently in Britain English:

I'm sorry, but do you think you could move your car? (I apologize in advance for anyinconvenience.)

In American English Pardon me and Excuse me are used for apologies:

Excuse me/ pardon me, I didn't see you there.

In British English you say Pardon? OrSorry? And in American English Pardon me? OrExcuse me? When you did not hear or understand what somebody said and want them to repeatit:

Pardon, could you say that again?

It is not polite to say What? If you have not heard or understood something.

I'm afraid

You use the phrase I'm afraid when you want to apologize because you have to tell somebodysomething that they may not like:

I'm afraid there's been an accident.Nina's not here at the moment, I'm afraid. Can I take a message?'Do you have any decaffeinated coffee?' 'I'm afraid not.''Has the last bus gone?' 'I'm afraid so.'

I wonder if

You use expressions which show hesitancy when you are asking somebody to do something orasking for a favor:

Could you just help me move this box, please?I wonder if I could have a copy of that letter.Would you mind if I felt a few minutes early today?Do you think I could borrow your car this evening?

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Please

You say Please when you ask for something. In British English it introduces or ends a request:

Please could I have the menu?

Could I have the menu, please?

You also use please when you ask somebody to do something:

Could you post this letter for me, please?Please could you post this letter for me?

Thank You

When somebody gives you something, or when you buy something or receive information. Youare expected to say Thank you or Thanks. Some people may be offended if you say nothing.

It is not usual to say anything in response to Thank you in British English, Although some peoplemay say That's all right, That's okay or Don't mention it. In American English you're welcome iscommon.

You say Thank you or Yes. Please when you want to accept something:

'How about another cup of coffee?' 'Thank you.' / 'Thanks.' / 'yes, please.'

You say No, thank you or no, thanks when you want you want to refuse something:

' Would you like some more cake?' 'No, thank you.' / 'No, thanks,'

Cheers

Cheers is often used in informal British English to mean Thank you:

'Here's that $5 I owe you.' 'Oh, cheers.'

You also say Cheers before you have a drink when you are with other people.

http://english-learn.blogspot.com.es/2005/05/polite-expression_07.html

Politely asking someone to do something

http://english-learn.blogspot.com.es/2005/05/polite-expression_07.htmlhttp://english-learn.blogspot.com.es/2005/05/polite-expression_07.html

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When we ask somebody to do something in a polite way, we can use this form:

Would you mind + -ing form of verb

Examples

Would you mind passing me the salt, please?Would you mind closing the window?

We can also ask somebody to not do something in the same way, using this form:

Would you mind + not + -ing form of verb

Examples

Would you mind not smoking?

Would you mind not shouting?

We can also use the following forms to ask someone politely to do something:

Would you (please) + base formCould you (please) + base form of verbCould I ask you to (please) + base form of verb

Examples

Would you pass me the salt?

Could you please talk more quietly?Could I ask you to please help me?

Similarily, when we want somebody to not do something we can use these forms:

Would you (please) + not + base formCould you (please) + not + base formCould I ask you to (please) + not + base form

Examples

Would you please not shout?Could you please not smoke in here?Could I ask you to please not make so much noise?

Inviting someone to do something with "Do"

When we invite somebody to do something in a polite way, we can use this form:

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Do + base form of verb

Examples

Do sit down.

Do have some cake.Do come with us.

Politely interrupting

When we want to interrupt somebody we can use one of the following expressions:

Sorry to bother you.Sorry to interrupt you.Sorry to disturb you.

Sorry to trouble you.

http://www.oneworldofenglish.com/english_grammar_reference/politely_interrupting

.htm

Polite words and expressions

hope

verb

usedinpolitestatements

seem

verb

usedwhenyouwanttosaysomethinginamorecarefulorpoliteandlessdirectway

respectfully

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adverb

usedforshowingthatyouarebeingpolite

perhaps

adverb

usedasapolitereplytosomeonewhenyoudonotcompletelyagreewithwhattheyhavesaid

Id/wed be delighted

usedforpolitelyacceptinganinvitation, oragreeingorofferingtodosomething

no disrespect (to)

usedbeforeyousaysomethingthatmightoffendsomeone, toshowthatyoudonotintendtooffendthem

do you mind?

usedforgettingsomeonespermissiontodosomething. Thiscaneitherbepolite, impolite, orhumorous. Ifsomeonesaysitinaloudway, theyareshowingthattheyareangryorannoyed

I took the liberty of doing something

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7/29/2019 Polite Expressions

7/10

usedfortellingsomeonethatyouhavedonesomethingwithouttheirpermissionbutyouhopethattheyapproveofthis

excuse me

usedforpolitelygettingsomeonesattention

excuse me

usedforpolitelytellingsomeoneyouareleavin

http://www.macmillandictionary.com/thesaurus-category/british/Polite-words-and-

expressions

How to be Polite in English

Politeness is the art of choosing among your thoughts.

Have you ever ordered at a restaurant in a foreign country only to get an ugly look from thewaiter? Have you ever asked somebody to do you a favor, only then to have them refuse with anupset tone in their voice? Well, maybe your problem when speaking English comes down to alack of politeness.

The English language is full of these little formalities which can definitely determine whetheryoure going to make a good first impression on someone or not. We have this unspokenetiquette when asking for information, or even when were offering something and we have totake into consideration how we are offering it. Using please and thank you is necessary in mostsituations. In a lot of situations, people expect a sort of indirect way of speaking to each other,which in my opinion is a little silly. But hey, when in Rome do as the Romans do (follow thecultural rules wherever you are).

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Making Requests/Asking For Something

One of the first things I noticed when I came to brazil was the way people order things here. Notlong after my arrival in Brazil I discovered the most amazing savory treat I had ever tastedThe COXINHA!! So, very eager to test my Portuguese, I went down to the local snack bar to

order one. Using my Portuguese dictionary, I said to the man,Com licenca, eu poderia ter umacoxinha por favor? Although he understood, he handed me the coxinha with a very peculiarlook on his face. I realized this must have been a strange way to order something when I heardthe guy next to me say, Ei, me d uma coxinha ai broder.

When ordering in English, we have a standard of politeness. The most common way to order inEnglish would be using:

Can I/Could I Could I have a coxina please? Can I have a coke please? Could I order please?Can you lend me ten dollars?

May I (used in more formal situations) May I attend the meeting next week? May I join youfor lunch?

Asking for Permission

A good tip when travelling to another country is to always ask if youre unsure about thepoliteness of something. Sometimes what may be normal in your culture might be considered alittle rude in someone elses culture. A good example would be how if here in Brazil I love tolisten to Baile Funk music on my cell phone when taking the bus (without earphones obviously).So, if I was to do that in Australia, I would ask permission of the people around me first byusing:

Do you mind ifI listen to my funk music really loudly / Would it be a problem if I listened tomy funk music really loudly / I was wondering if I could listen to my funk music.

These three expressions can be used in any situation when asking for permission. When askingthis way we also have to use a softer tone of voice. The reason we do this is because we want theperson to know that if its going to irritate them, they have the option of saying no withoutfeeling uncomfortable. Sounds crazy right? Were so worried about offending the other person.Thats English for you.

Not Understanding

In English, when we dont understand what someone says, the first reaction would be to saysorry? (in a soft tone of voice). Not sorry like desculpa but sorry like oi? This is themost common way, and it is considered to be polite. In Portuguese, you guys use a differentmethod: UHHHHH? Now that I have been living here for a while, I know that you are notbeing rude when you say this, but from a foreign perspective, especially when youre notfamiliar with the language, this can be kind of troubling. My first impression when someone said

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this to me was Damn, Ive just offended this person in some way or My Portuguese is so badthat he or she is getting angry. So try avoiding this one in English.

Instead, always use:

Sorry? Its polite and they will repeat, maybe even simplify what they just said.

Pardon (me)? A more polite way of saying sorry. This is sometimes used in a a more formalsituation.

Excuse me? This is asking the person to repeat. Depending on the tone of your voice, it couldexpress shock at what the person said, or maybe that you didnt like the context of what theysaid.

Turning Down an Invitation/ Disagreeing

Last but not least, the awkwardness of having to say no to people. When travelling, or spendingtime in an English speaking country, we are always going to come across these situations.

Ladies (Or guy for that matter), have you ever had to turn a guy down but didnt want to offendhim? Or maybe you have had to disagree with someone, but you didnt want to be sounddefensive. In English, we use these softening tools to make what we say not so so direct.

Turning Down an Invitation

Im afraid I cant

Id love to but

That sounds great but

Disagreeing

I see what youre saying, but I think

You could be right, but dont forget that

Yes thats true, but Im not sure that

Hey dude, do you want to come to my sisters spelling bee? Hey, Id love to, but Josh is

making spaghetti tonight.

Hey sexy! I would love to buy you a drink. Oh, Im afraid I cant, I have boyfriend.

Donkey Kong is the best game ever! I see what youre saying, but I think Mortal Kombat isthe best game ever.

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Sounding polite is obviously a personal choice everyone has to make on their own. There aresome situations where we have to put our foot down, be demanding, and even rudeness couldsometimes necessary from time to time. So, my advice to you all would be to always try to usethese polite expressions when in a foreign country, as you can never be too sure what isconsidered rude or polite in their culture.

http://reallifebh.com/how-to-be-polite-in-english