Orphan Moon (The Orphan Moon Trilogy Book...
Transcript of Orphan Moon (The Orphan Moon Trilogy Book...
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Contents
TitlePagePraiseforOrphanMoonDescriptionCopyrightDedicationChapterOne-September27,1860ChapterTwo-September26,1860ChapterThree-September27,1860
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ChapterFour-Tuesday,October16,1860ChapterFive-September27,1860ChapterSix-October20,1860ChapterSeven-September27,1860ChapterEight-September27,1860ChapterNine-October26,1860ChapterTen-November3,1860
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ChapterEleven-November13,1860ChapterTwelve-November15,1860ChapterThirteen-November16,1860ChapterFourteen-November26,1860ChapterFifteen-November26,1860ChapterSixteen-November29,1860AcknowledgmentsANoteFromtheAuthor
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AbouttheAuthor
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ORPHANMOON
By
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T.K.Lukas
BookOneoftheOrphanMoon
Trilogy
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ChevalierPublishing
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PRAISEFORT.K.LUKAS’S
ORPHANMOON
“Highlyrecommended!Anexciting,breathlessreadwithwell-
developedcharactersandaplotthatkeeps
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youguessing.”—Elizabeth
“Excellentread!Thestorygrabsyoufromtheverybeginningandkeepsyouwantingmore!”
—Aubrey
“Youshouldread
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thisbook.Itisagreatstoryofovercominghardshipwithalove
storythreadedthroughoutlotsof
adventure.”—Ron
“Gritty,rawAmericanhistory…I
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feltlikeIwasthere.LOVEthatinagood
novel.”—Gary
“Lovedthisbook!Grippingstorygrabsyoufromtheverystart.T.K.Lukasdoesanamazingjob
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ofcreatingcharacters.Youlovethemorhatethembutyoufeellikeyouknowthemall.”
—Sherry
“Highlyrecommended.Theauthormakesthe
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characterscomealivewithexquisitedetailsanddialog...IfeellikeIknowthem.Ican'twaitforthenext
bookintheseries!”—Beth
“T.K.Lukas'swritingreflectsthe
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kindofmaturitythatwillshinemoreandmorewitheach
passingnovel.Kudostoher!”
—GrammarDowager
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1860 - Palo Pinto, Texas:Under the spectacular glowof a Comanche moon, afamily is slaughtered, theirhomesteadtorched.
Nineteen-year-old BarleighFlanders survives theterrifying raid. Fiercelydetermined to rebuild, sheseizes an opportunity meantforanother.It'safoolhardy,reckless scheme. Desperate,near penniless, it's her only
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hope.
Her grueling physicaljourney stretches fromTexas, toMissouri, and intothe rugged Utah Territory.However, it's her emotionaljourney that takes her toplaces of uncharteddarkness, discovery, andredemption.
In Hughes Levesque,Barleigh gains an unsought
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ally with dark secrets of hisown.Ahiredgun,itbecomeshispersonalmission tokeepBarleighsafe.Doingsomaycosthimhislife,hisjob,andhisheart,noneofwhichhe'skeentolose.
Orphan Moon is a heart-wrenching saga of familylove,loss,andbetrayal.Botha gripping adventure and atimeless lovestory, itgallopsacross the bleeding edge of
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thewesternfrontier.
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Copyright©2015T.K.Lukas
Allrightsreserved.
Nopartofthisbookmaybereproduced,scanned,or
distributedinanyprintedorelectronicformwithoutthepermissionoftheauthor.
Pleasedonotparticipateinor
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encouragepiracyofcopyrightedmaterialsinviolationoftheauthor’s
rights.
Purchaseonlyauthorizededitions.
ISBN-10:0-9962356-0-4ISBN-13:978-0-9962356-0-0
ChevalierPublishingNote:
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Thisbookisaworkoffiction.Names,characters,places,andincidentseither
aretheproductoftheauthor’simaginationorareusedfictitiously,andanyresemblancetoactualpersons,livingordead,businessestablishments,
events,orlocalesisentirelycoincidental.
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Dedication
ForBaron,myhusband,myfriend,mylover,myreal-lifehero…
Yourunwaveringsupport
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andencouragement—yourunshakable,never-endingbeliefinme—isthesourceofmystrength,myjoy,andmysmile.
I’mgratefulforyourlove.
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CHAPTERONESEPTEMBER27,1860
HighupontheBrazosRiverridge,bare-chestedwarriorsonwar-paintedhorsesgatheredwithlances,bowsandarrows,andtomahawksinhand.Thefire-holder,theelderandreveredmedicineman,satastridehisdecoratedpintointhemiddleoftheassembly,hismount
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indifferenttotheflamingtorcheshisridergrippedineachhand.Otherhorsesstompeduppuffsoffinecalichedustthatglitteredinthemoonlight.Onehundredormoreinstrength,theywaitedinpatientsurveillanceofthequietfarmhousebelow,whilethoseinthefarmhousewatchedthem.
Themooncastshadowswherethereshouldhavebeennone,asifthesun
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insteadhadreachedfullbloom.Alonewhitestallionstoodonthehighestpointoftheridge,silhouettedagainstthesilverybackdrop,itsridersittingtall.Heheldhishandhighabovehishead,asifconnectingtosomelunarspirit.Hisarmdropped,thesignalwasgiven.Therockyridgecamealivewithhorsespouringovertheedge,slidingandtumblingdownthesteepslope,racingacrossthe
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valley.Withterrifyingwarcriesfillingtheair,gyratingcirclesofmountedwarriorsconstrictedinanever-tighteningnoosearoundtheranch.
Brilliantarcsoflighteruptedinthenightskylikeblazingtracesofshootingstarsfallingfromtheheavens.BarleighFlandersstoodtransfixedinthebarricadedwindowofherbedroom,peeringthroughthegunport
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asarrowsstreamingfireraineddownallaround.Dreadrootedherfeettothefloor.
Henry’shandsshookhisdaughter’sshoulders.“Runtothegoatshed,Barleigh.Getinthecellar.TakeBirdieandthebabyandAuntWinnie.Now!UncleJackandI’llgivecovertillwecanmakearunforit.”
“No,Papa.I’mstayingwithyou.”Barleigh
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pickeduptheshotgun,thrustitthroughtheport.
“Don’targue,girl.Notimetowaste.Keepholdofyourgun—takeitwithyou.”
WinnieranoutofBirdie’sroomcarryingthebaby.Borntwodaysearlieronthefirstnightofthefullmoon,Barleigh’shalf-sisterwailedwithhunger.“Birdie’stooweaktorunorwalk.Havingthischildtookallofherstrength.”
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Henryshoutedinstructionsasheshovedthemoutthebackdoor.“I’llcarryBirdiedowninaminute.Don’topenthehatchunlessyouknowit’sme.Hurrynow—run.”
Theyran,WinnieclutchingBirdie’sandHenry’sbaby,Barleightheshotgun.Noblethehoundboundedalongside,hisblackhairbristlinginalarm.Fromthebackofthehouse,pastthe
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horsecorral,thentothegoatshed,theyracedtheroilingcloudofdustchurninginfromtheridge.Barleighthrewopenthesecrethatchinthefloor,andafterWinnieandthedogmadetheirwaydowntheangledearthensteps,sheslippedintothecooldarknessbelow.Henryhaddugthecellarandcraftedasecretdoorforitastheirhidingplacetoseekshelterfromdangerousweatheror
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evenmoredangerousmen.“Hurry.Closethe
hatch,”Winniewhispered.Shebentforward,shieldingthebaby’stinybodywithherbroad,sturdybackashoovespoundedthegroundallaround,dirtsiftingdownontotheirheads.
“ButPapa’scomingwithBirdie.”Barleighpeekedoutthehatch,strainingtosee.Acavalcadeofhorsespassedinfrontoftheopendoorof
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thegoatshed.Allshesawwerefasthoovesandpaintedlegs,butthatwasenough.Sheknewwhatwasabove.Shesecuredthelatch.
Inthesafetyofthecellar,theyclungtoeachother,thebabynestledbetweenthem.Thehugeblackdogsatonhishaunches,watchingthehatchwithakeenalertness,alowrumblesteadyinhisthroat.Bloodcurdlingcrieslingered
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onthewind;thunderinghoofbeatsechoed;gunfireexploded,diminished,fadedaway,andthesharpsmellofthingsburningfounditswayunderground.
“Shh,shh....”Winniecradledthehungry,cryingbabyagainstheramplebosom,placingafingerinhermouthtohushit.“Bequiet,Noble,”shecommandedthecuriousdogthathowledinunison.
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“Thenannygoatisjustoutsidethesheddoorinthepen,”Barleighsaid.“Icanmakearunforit.Grabthegoatandduckbackinside.Thisbabyneedsmilk.Birdiemaynot—”
“No.It’stoodangerousforyoutogooutside.I’llletthebabysucksomepeachnectaroffmyfinger.Canyoufindajarofpeachesinthedark?”
Thebaby’shunger
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wasgreaterthanthenectar.Herwailingintensifiedintopiercing,balled-fistedspasms.WinnietiedaragaroundNoble’smuzzletokeephimfromjoininginagain.
“Weneedthatgoat.”Barleighcreptupthestepsandcrackedopenthehatch,herdeterminedblueeyespeeringoutside.Dreadfulnoisereverberatedinthedistance,butoverheadquiet
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filledthedarkness.Shecrawledoutside,foundthemilkingstool,andwedgeditinplacetokeepthehatchproppedopen.
“Stayinthecellaronthestepswiththegunpointedoutthehatch,”BarleighsaidtoWinnie.“Don’tbeafraidtoshootifsomethingneedsshooting.IfIdon’tcomebackintwominutes,pushthemilkingstoolawayandboltthehatch.”
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ThewordsechoedinBarleigh’smind.Don’tbeafraidtoshootifsomethingneedsshooting.Thosewerethewordsofherfather,Henry’spartingphrasewhenleavingBarleighattheranchalone,andthewordshe’dsaidwhenhe’dhandedherthenewshotgunthreemonthsearlieronhernineteenthbirthday.
“I’mnotafraidtoshoot,butIdon’tlikethis
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plan.Ishouldbetheonegoingforthegoat.Youshouldbeinherewithyourbabysister.”Winniebrushedadirty-blondecurloffherworriedforehead,thewidestreaksofpre-maturegraymatchingthecolorofherequallyworriedeyes.
“You’rethemidwife.Youknowbabies.Iknowanimals.Icancatchagoat.”
“Allright.”Winniesighedthedeepsighofone
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givingin.Sheplacedthebabyinabasketofragsandgrabbedtheshotgun.“I’mready.”
Clingingtothedarkness,pressingherbackagainstthewall,herthinframealmostasthinashershadow,sheinchedtowardthedoorthatledoutsidetotheattachedpen.Thenannygoatshouldbejustinsidethegatenexttothefeedtrough,shethought.
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Barleighrushedtothegate,searching.Whereisshe?Shelistenedforamoment,makingoutthesoundoffaintbleating.Thick,chokingsmokehungintheair.Shecoughed,coveredhermouthandnosewithherhand,tryingnottomakeasound.Ignoringtheshoutedsongsoftriumphantcelebrationinthedistance,theeerieorangeglow,theflickeringlightfromfireburningallaround,
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sheopenedthegate,groping,andmadeablindgrab.Herhandsettledonthegoat’sbellcollar.Thehappytinklingsounditmaderangloud.Barleighgrabbedthebrassclanger,snatchingitinherclutchedfisttoquiettheconvictingnoise.
Runningbackinsidetheshedwiththegoatinherarms,sheheardanoisecomingfrombehind.Sheturnedtoseethesilhouetteof
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awarriorframedinthedoorway,adarkfigurebracedagainstthebackdropofflamesandsmoke.
Winniescreamed.Barleighdroppedto
theground,clutchingthegoattoherchest.Ashotgunblastsplittheair.ShelookeduptoseetheIndian,tomahawkraised,flyingbackward,withbloodspurtingfromaholeinhischest.Hefelltothefloor,dead.
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HandingthegoatofftoWinnie,Barleighrolledhisbodyupagainstthewallandthencoveredhimwithemptyfeedbags.Shescatteredloosehayoverthetomahawkandthewidepoolofblood,fearfuloftheevidenceandthestorythatthescenewouldrevealtoanotherpassingby.
*****Theymilkedthegoat,takingturnslettingthebabysuckthestickysweetnessofftheir
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fingers.Satisfied,sheslept.Takingarisk,Barleighlittheoillamp,dialedthewickdowntothelowestheightbeforeitextinguished,theflickeroflightallowingaquickreminderoftheirsurroundingsbeforeshesnuffedtheflame.
Birdie’spreservedfruitsandvegetableslinedtheshelves.Barleigh’spreservedthoughtsanddreamslinedherjournals,whichshekept
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stackedbelowtheshelves.Shecountedeightboundbooks,oneeachyearbeginningwhenshehadturnedtwelve.Thecellarwasherwritingplace.Herdreamingplace.Herhidingplace.
Noblesatlikeasentinelguardingthehatchwhilethelittlegoatpaced.“I’msorry,NannyGoat,butifNoblewearsamuzzle,somustyou.”Thegoat’s
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confusedbleatinghadgrownlouder,herfranticstridingmorevigorous.“Sorry.”
BarleighandWinnieatethejarofpeaches.Likethenervousgoat,theypaced.Winnieusedabucketofoldwashwatertorelieveherself.Itseemedasifthenightmightneverend,buteventuallyitstretchedintothequietstillnessofmorning.
“Ican’tstandthisany
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longer,”Barleighsaid,thesilenceofthepreviousfewhoursbecomingtooheavy.“Ineedtoknowwhat’soutthere.IfPapaandUncleJackwereable,theywould’vecomeforusbynow.”
Winnienoddedagreement.“Yes.Jack—”Sheletthesentencetrailaway.
Theyascendedthesteps,crackedopenthehatch.Incontrasttotheviolent
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chaosthatwasthenight,dappledsunlightbathedtheearth,songbirdssangtooneanother,andthepeacefulworldseemednormal.Barleigh’seyesadjustedtothemorning’slight.Shelookedaround...andrealizedherworldwouldneverbenormalagain.
Smokecurledfromtheashyheapwhereoncestoodthehorsebarn.Thecorral’scharcoaledplanks
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sparkedinthebreeze.Whatlittlethatremainedofthehousestoodundertheprotectivearmsofasingedcottonwoodtree.Greenpearsgatheredthepreviousdayfromtheorchardsatpiledinbaskets,theshinyredpushcartsittingnexttowhatusedtobethekitchenporch.Thereinitsplacewasnowagapingblackholeopeningintothegutted,smolderinghouse.
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“Oh,dearGod,”Winniecriedout,layingthebabyinthepushcartnexttothepears.SherantoJack.Hisbodylaysprawledandmotionlessontheground.Adozenarrowssproutedfromhischest,withalancesecuringhimfromevermovingfromthatpositionagain.Fromthewaistdown,hewasstrippedofclothes,hismostprivatepartsslicedoff.Winniereachedtoclosehis
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eyes,hisgruesomedeathstarefrighteningtolookat,butitwasimpossible—hiseyelidswerecutaway,too.Stubby,bloodypalmswereallthatremainedofhishands,withallofhisfingersandthumbschoppedoff.And,fromeartoear,hisscalpwassawedfromhishead.
ThesightcausedBarleigh’sstomachtolurch.Shespunaway,fistedherhands,andpushedthemhard
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againsthereyes.ThesoundofWinnie’ssoftvoicedrewherbackaround.
Winniewasonherknees,kneelingnexttoherhusband’sbody.“There,there,there.”Shesoothedhim,kissedhim,andcaressedhisbloodyface.Speakingtenderwordstohim,sheeasedhistrousersup,beltingthemwithgentlehands.
Theyremovedthearrowsfromhisbodybut
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couldnotpullthelancefromhischest,sodeeplythespearwasimpaledintotheground.Together,leaningwithalltheirweightonit,breakingitoff,theymanagedtolifthisbodyoffthejaggedshaftembeddedintherockysoil.ThelancecaughtapieceofJack’sshirt,tearingit,keepingholdofit,andBarleighstartedtopullthefragmentofhisshirtfree.
“No!”saidWinnie,
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sharply,emphatically,hereyesglazedandstaringattheflappingfabric.“Leaveit.Letitbeabanner.Thismarkstheplacewhereagoodmandied.”
*****TheygatheredasmuchofBirdie‘sandHenry’sremainsastheycould.TheircharredbodieswerefoundtogetherinthebedwhereBirdiehadgivenbirthjustdaysbefore.ItappearedasifHenrywasbent
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overher,hisbodycovering,protecting,shieldinghers.AComanche’spiercinglanceaffixedthemtooneanotherforeternity.
Withtheirashyremainsfoldedtogetherinablanket,WinnieandBarleighcarriedthemtothegoatshedwheretheyhadpulledJack’sbody.ThedeadIndianwasdraggedoutoftheshedandleftforthescavengingvulturesalreadyhovering
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overthepiercedandimpaledcattlecarcassesdottingthepastures.Theypiledstrawontopoftheirdead,snakingatrailoutside.Then,splashingkeroseneallaround,theytossedlitmatchesontothesoakedstraw,watchingasfireracedintotheshed.Theloudcrackle-popofthefuneralpyredrownedouttheirsobs.
Windgusted,stokingtheflamesintoafrenzy.Flakesofashdrifteddown,
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thecrematedashesoftheirbeloved.Barleighturnedintothebreeze,tearsstreakingthegrimeonherface,thewet,ashymixtureseepingintoherpores,meltingintoherskin.SheimaginedapartofPapaandBirdieforeverbecomingapartofher,goingwithheralways.
Someashesflittedandtwirledhighintheair,blownintothelateSeptemberskybythefire’shotbreath.
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“You’refreetoflyawaynow,Birdie,”shesaidastheashesswirledabovethetreetops.“YouandPapaarenowfreetobetogether.”
*****“Isthereanythingtosavefromthehouse?”askedWinnie.ShepickeduptheblackandredwovenNavahoblanketPapahadkeptonthefrontporchchair,shakingashesfromit,sniffingit,poundingithardagainstthe
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railingbeforefoldingitoverherarm.
Whatcouldbesalvaged?Memories?“There’snotmuchleft.”Barleighwalkedouttothefrontporch,clutchingtwotintypephotographs.
“IrememberseeingyourpapawiththisblanketaroundhisshouldersthenightBirdiegavebirth,himpacingouthereontheporch.Themoonspotlightedhimlikean
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actoronastageperformingforcactusandcattle.”Winnie’sdarkeyesappearedhollowandsunken,pulledinwardfromtheterror.Hergazedrifted,unblinking,totheBrazosRiverridge.
Barleighfollowedherstare.Itwasmorethancactusandcattlewatching,theybothknew.They’doverheardHenryandJackspeakofthegrowingnumberofwarriorsontheridgeeachnight.
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HenryhadspottedthefirsthintofaraidingpartyonWednesday,thebeginningofthetimeoftheComanchemoon,thenightHenryandBirdie’sbabychosetoentertheworld.
“Ifoundthese,”Barleighsaid,showingWinniethetintypes.“Birdielooksalmostwhiteinthisone,don’tyouthink?”
Winnienodded,takingthephotographfrom
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Barleigh’shands.“Shewasbeautiful.It’snowonderyourpapafellinlovewithher,despitethecircumstances.Iknowyoulovedher,too.”
“Yes.Ilovedher.Shewaslikeamothertome.”
LookingatBirdie’sphotograph,hersilkyblackcurlstoherwaist,herfinefeatures,heralmondeyes,waslikelookingatthenegativeimageofherself.Barleighhadlearnedata
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youngage,though,nottoaskfoolishquestionsastowhyahalf-Negro,half-FrenchCajunslaveofhergrandfatherandshe,whosebloodwasIrishandFrench,sharedalikeness.
Thefewsalvageditems—twotintypes,Henry’sblackchurchhat,Birdie’sBible,andtheNavajoblanket—wereplacedintothepushcartalongwiththepears.Asmallload.Barleigh
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marveledathowlittleshenowpossessed.Shethoughtaboutthingstakenforgrantedyesterday.Thedaybeforetheattack.Thedaybeforeherworldturneddark.Thedaybeforeherheartwasinflictedwithawoundsoseveresheexpecteditwouldneverheal.
ThecanopiedroadthatledeasttoWinnie’shousewasanarrow,rolling,anddustylane.Itwasatwo-hourrideonhorseback,an
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hourinanemergency.Barleighhadwhittleditdowntolessthanthatthedayshe’dgallopedforhelpwhenWinnie’smidwiferyskillshadbeenneeded.Theywalkedinsilence.
Frombehind,anoisestartledthemfromtheirprivatethoughts.Jumpinglikefrightenedrabbitsintothewoods,pullingthecart,thedog,andthegoatinwiththem,theyhidbehinda
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thicketofcedar.Shaking.Waiting.Peeringthroughbranches.Eachholdingtheirbreath.
ItwasBarleigh’shorse,Deal,withhisunmistakablewhinny.Hiswasnotahigh-pitchedwhinnybutadeep,throatyrumble—arat-a-tatgruntingmorelikethesoundofapersonclearingtheirthroat.Lame,limpingbadly,hisleftforelegboreazigzaggedgash
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thattoredeepintothemuscle.Mostofthehaironhisrighthipwasburnedaway,leavingangryblackblistersonhisskin.Buthewasalive.
“Icanpoulticethosewounds,”saidWinnie.“Theinjuriesaresevere.They’lltakealongtimetoheal.Thescarswillbeugly,butthey’renotfatalwounds.”ShegaveBarleigh’shandsagentlesqueeze.
Dark,cloudythoughts
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gatheredinBarleigh’smind.WasWinnietryingtoconveythatthesamewastrueforher?Thatherheart’swoundswouldhealbutwouldleaveuglyscars?Shedoubtedthatanyheartcouldsurvivewhathershadsuffered,fearinginsteadthatherheartwouldturntovapor.
*****EveryonefromPaloPintotoFortWorthcalledWinifredandJackJustin“Aunt
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Winnie”and“UncleJack.”Barleighpretendedshewasherreallifeaunt.Sometimes,shepretendedWinniewasmore.Sometimes,Barleighcalledher“Momma”whensheknewWinniewouldn’thear,justtoseehowthewordsfeltfallingfromhermouth.
Sheneverknewherrealmother,andeachbirthdayBarleighcelebratedwasaguiltyreminderofthe
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loss.ButshehadBirdie.Thoughshewaslikeamother,itwasforbiddenthatBarleighconsiderherasamother,orevenasfamily.AsimilewasallGrandfatherallowed.However,HenrychangedallthatafterGrandfatherdied.
“I’vemadeyoubreakfast.”Winnieputthecoffeekettleonthestove,thensatdown.
Barleighstaredatthe
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foodonthetable,herstomachunsettled.“I’mnothungry.But...thankyou.”
“Atleastdrinksomemilk.”WinniegotupandpouredaglasswithoutwaitingforBarleightoanswer.“Youneedtoputsomethingintherebesidescoffee.”
“Thehorsesthatweren’tburnedaliveinthebarntheystole,exceptforDeal,whotheyleftfordead.
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But,whydidtheyhavetokillthecattle?”Shepushedtheheelsofherpalmsagainsthereyes,tryingtorubawaythehorrificmemory.
Thebarnhadbeenfullofmareswithfoals.Barrenmares,stallions,andgeldingshadbeenseparatedandturnedouttopasturesandpaddocks.Allinthebarndied.Afewfleeinghorseshadbeenkilledinthemelee.Hundredsofcattlecarcasses
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wereleftscatteredacrossthepastures,arrowsembeddedintheirsilverygrayhides,theirbrown-eyedvacantstaresgoingonforever.
“Theycangallopawaywithhorses.Cowsaretoodifficulttocontrol.Theyturnintoadangerousstampede.Theymaykeeponeortwoforfood.Butwhattheycan’ttake,theykillorburn.Orboth.”Winniestaredintohercoffee,slippingaway
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tohersilentplace.Asilentplace—
Barleighlongedforone.Dayornighthermindscreamedoverthehorror—waking,sleeping.She’dopenhereyesandseeitallagain.She’dclosehereyes,andtheimageswouldremain.Ifitwould’vemadetheterriblevisionsstop,thememoriesfade,she’dhaveclawedouthereyesandfedthemtothedogs.
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Barleighwanderedupstairstoherroom,leavingWinnietoherthoughts.WrappingtheNavajoblanketaroundhershoulders,shesatintherockingchairnexttothewindow,thephotographsofherpapaandBirdiedisplayedonthesill.Outsideinthepaddock,shewatchedherhorseashelimpedfeeblytowardthewatertrough,stoppingshort,thepainfromhiswoundstoomuchforhis
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effort.Thesightwasherundoing.Itshatteredher,brokeherapart,andsheburiedherfaceintheblanketandwept.
*****Winniehadtakentowringingherhandswhenshetalked.“It’sbeentwoweekssinceIsentwordtomysons’regimentcommander.Surelyhe’llapprovetheirleave.JacksonandJonahwillbearthenewsonstrongshoulders.
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Ifearit’llbehardestonlittleJeddy.”
“Whileyou’reinquiringatthemilitiaheadquarters,”saidBarleigh,watchingasWinniefrettedwithherhands,“IwanttopayavisittoMr.Goldthwaiteatthebank.”
“Yes.Iunderstand.That’sanotherreasontoleaveyourbabysisterhere.WehavetoomuchtodoinFortWorth.”
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“ButI’mworried—”“Esperanzaiscapable.
Shehelpedraisemythreeboys.Nowdon’tgolookingatmelikeI’msuggestingyouleaveherforayear.It’llbeoneday.She’sbetteroffherewithEsperanza.”
“I’mallshehasinthisworld.Whatifsomethinghappens?”
“There’snoneedtoworry.She’llbefine,”saidWinnie,windingand
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unwindingherhands.“It’snogoodluck,a
babygoingthislongwithnoname,”Esperanzasaid.“Tonocallherbyherownnamecannobegood.”Shebentandliftedthebabyfromthecradle.
BarleighlookedatWinnie,panicked.ShehaddreadedthethoughtofherhavingbeenbornunderaComanchemoon,hadfearedwhatbadomenthatmayhave
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foretold.Whatkindofmisfortunehadsheaddedtothat,bynotnamingher?“HaveIbroughtherbadluck?”
“No,”saidWinnieemphatically.“Butshedoesneedaname,nomatterthereason.Whathaveyouconsidered?”
“Ihaven’tconsideredanything.You’reamother.You’regoodatthesekindofthings.”
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“Inamedthreeboys.She’syoursister.Youshouldhavethehonor.”
BarleightriedoutafewcombinationsinherheadasshewatchedEsperanzateaseasmilefromthebaby’smouthwithawarmbottle.ShewantedsomethingthatwouldremindherofBirdieandofherPapa.
“Starling,forBirdie,andHenrietta,forPapa.Whatdoyouthink?”
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“StarlingHenriettaFlanders.That’sperfect.”WinnietookthebabyfromEsperanza.“Starling,younowhaveabeautifulname.”
*****WhentheyarrivedinFortWorth,thetownwasanaxisofexcitement,folksjoinedinanimatedconversationsabouttheupcomingpresidentialelectionthreeweeksandonedayaway.Barleighonceentertainedopinionsabout
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suchmattersaspolitics.They’dseemedimportantwhenherpapahadengagedherinspiriteddebates.She’dhavearguedthattheRepublicanAbrahamLincolnwouldmakethebestleader,eventhoughmanyinTexasfavoredtheNorthernDemocrat,StephenA.Douglas.However,herfocusonthisdaywaswhatshehadtodotorebuildherranch.
Barleighhurried
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towardthebank,ahandkeepingherhatfromblowingawaywhilethegustywindflutteredherskirts.Shereacheddowntostraightenthem,andasshedid,shenoticedapieceofpaperbeingcarriedaloftonthebreeze.Itsettledatherfeetasthewindblewitselfout.Shesawthatitwasanadvertisement.Pickingupthepaper,sheread:
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WANTED.Young,skinny,wiryfellows.Notovereighteen.Mustbeexpertriders.Willingtoriskdeathdaily.Orphanspreferred.Wages$25PerWeek.
Apply:PonyExpressStables,SaintJoseph,Missouri
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It’stoobadI’mnotafellow,shethought,foldingthepaperandtuckingitintoherpocketasshesteppedthroughthebank’sheavy,barreddoors.
Mr.Goldthwaitewascordial,escortingherintohisoffice,offeringsincerecondolencesonthedeathofherfatherandofJackJustin.HenevermentionedBirdie.Then,hepropositionedher.
“Yourfather,”he
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explained,tobaccojuicestainingthecornersofhismouth,“wasnobusinessman.Hewasabreederoffineequines,aknowledgeablecattleman,buthelackedbusinessacumen.Myself?I’manastutebusinessman,quitecleverwithstretchingthedollar.”Hewinked.
Sherememberedfromwhatseemedalifetimeago,althoughithadbeenonlyfiveyearspast,herinitial
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encounterwiththismanthefirstnightthey’dmadeittoFortWorth.She,herpapa,grandfather,andBirdiehadlefttheGulfCoastbehind,hadspentthreelongweeksinacoveredwagonbeforereachingtheFort,andsherecalledhisinclinationatexpressingsignificantmeaningthroughthedramaticblinkingofoneeye.Shestillfoundthepeculiarhabitannoying.
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“Icametoyouforadvice,Mr.Goldthwaite,”shesaid,herhandsfoldedinherlap.“Myplanistorebuildtheranch.”Sheenvisionedasmallbarntostart,thenaserviceablehouse,addingafewbreedinganimalsasshecould.
“Mydeargirl,”hesaid.“WhenIheardaboutyourtragedyfromCaptainGoodnight,Istraightawayinspectedyourfather’s
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accountandIwentoverhislegalpapers.Viahiswill,you’veinheritedoutrightallofyourfather’sestate.Thatmeansallofthedebtsaswellasalloftheassets.”
“Idon’tbelievemyfatherhadanydebts.Hiscustomwastopaycashforeverything.”
“Heownedtheranchoutright,freeandclear.However,heletaccruethetaxesontheproperty.Last
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yearitwastooffsetthepurchaseofbreedingheifers.Thisyearitwastooffsetthepurchaseofthosefancythoroughbredsyourlategrandfatherwassofondofandyourfather,er,latefather,likedtouseforbroodmares.”
Aweedypanicbegantotakeroot.“Can’tyouusethemoneythat’sintheaccounttopaythetaxes?GetthemcaughtupuntilIcan
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findawaytoearnsomemoney?”Letthetaxesaccrue?WhywouldPapadothat?
“Ihaveanideaonhowwecantakecareofthetaxes.”Mr.Goldthwaite,inhiswrinkledgraysuitwithsilverwatchfobdanglingtoolowfromhisvestpocket,waddledfromhisdeskandstoodbehindherchair.Hisstumpy,liver-spottedhandsmassagedhershouldersina
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fashiontoofamiliarforcasualacquaintances.
“I’malonelyman.Imisshavingawife,Godresthersoul.Imissthepleasuresthatawifeaffordsaman.”Hemassagedharder,hisfingersworkingforwardanddownwardfromhershoulders,brushingoverherchest.
Ared-hotblushblossomedonherface.“Mr.Goldthwaite!Pleasestop
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what—”“Ifyou’dconsentto
myproposalofmarriage,”hesaid,plungingahead,“wellthen,I’msureIcouldpersuadetheboardoftrusteestograntyouanextensiononthetaxes,inlightofyourrecenttragedy.”
Herbodyshudderedwiththeabsurdity.“Marriage?Asin,memarryyou?”
“Ofcourseonce
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married,I’dtransferyourlandtomynameinorderthatyou’dnothavetoworryaboutthetaxesinthefuture.Asyourhusband,I’dtakecareofallthatbusinessnonsenseforyou.I’dgiveyouahandsomeallowance,ofcourse,tobuyyourselfprettylittlethings.”
Sheunfoldedherhandsfromherlap,clutchingthearmsofthechairinawhite-knucklegrip.“Mr.
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Goldthwaite,yourofferisgenerous,but,Iprefertotakecareofmattersmyownway.Now,pleaseremoveyourhandsfrommyshoulders.”
“MissFlanders,takesometimetothinkaboutmyoffer.You’restillgrieving.Giveseriousconsiderationtotheoptionsandtheconsequences.”
“Consequences?”“Particularlytothe
consequences.”Heleanedin,
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whisperinghissourbreathinherear.“Takeuntilthebeginningoftheyearwhentaxesaredue.Januarymaycomearoundandcauseyoutoseethingsinadifferentlight.Bytheway,yourfather’saccounthasalittleovertwohundredandfifty-sevendollarsleftinit.Taxespastandpresentamounttofourhundredandsixdollars,giveortake.”
Barleigh’sheartfeltas
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ifitmightpoundfromherchest.Herthroatconstrictedandburnedassheswallowed,tryinghardtopushdowntherisingswellofpanic.“Ipledgeallthemoneyinmyfather’s,Imean,inmyaccount,towardtaxesowed.I’llhavetheresttoyoubytheendofJanuary.”
“MissFlanders,youdorealizethatthisbankcanforecloseonyourpropertyfordelinquenttaxesandsellthe
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landtosatisfythedebt?Consequences.”Hekneadedhershouldersharder.
“Mr.Goldthwaite,youdorealizethatyoucandieamiserabledeathandrotinhell?”
Sheshovedawayfromthechair,sendinghimtotteringandstumblingbackward,andthenmarchedoutofhisoffice.Betweenhisembarrassingactionsandherownsurprisingwords,a
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pricklyheatblushedhercheeks.Withasmuchdignityasshecouldmuster,sheleftthebank,headhigh,andelbowedherwaydownthecrowdedsidewalk,somehowmanagingtoreachthealleybeforelosingthecontentsofherstomach.
Reachingintoherpocketforahandkerchief,herhandinsteadcameoutwiththeadvertisementshe’dfoundearlier.Withthepaper
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unfolded,shereadthewordsagain,thewritingseemingtojumpofthepage.Shewasyoung,skinny,andwiry.Onlyslightlyovereighteen.Anexpertridersinceachild.Willingtoriskdeath?Forsuchgenerouswages?Yes.Shequalifiedasanorphan,inthetechnicalsensethatbothparentswerenowdead.Therewasonlyoneconspicuousconcern.Shewasnotafellow.
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Refoldingthepaperandtuckingitintoherpocket,shesetofftofindWinnie.
Deepwithin,wherepretenseandtruthcometogetherinabattleofwits,sheknewthiswaybillwasmeanttofindher.Thegodswhogovernthewindsdepositedthispaperatherfeet.Angelsscootedittowardherviaagentlecurrentfromtheirflutteringwings.Someinvisibleforceintheuniverse
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slowedtheearth’sorbitlongenoughforthistocatchuptoher.Anytheory,plausibleornot,fit,becausesheknewthiswasheranswer.Thiswasherhope.Sheknew,withoutadoubt,thiswasherdestiny.
***** Clutchingthepapertightlyinherhands,Barleighreviewedherthoughts,gettingherideasinorder.Thekettleofcoffeeshe’dmadeearlierasshewaitedfor
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Winnietocomedownforbreakfastwashalfgone,aswereherchewed-offfingernails.
Winnieyawnedassheshuffledintothesun-filledkitchen.“Goodmorning.You’reupearly.”
“Ihaven’tslept.”“Areyouhungry?I
canfixpancakes.”Sheshookherheadas
sheheldoutthepaper,releasingthebreathshe’d
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beenholding.“IwanttoshowyouwhatIfoundyesterday,orwhatfoundme.ThisishowI’mgoingtosavemyland.”
OntheirreturnfromFortWorththedaybefore,BarleighhaddisclosedtoWinniewhatshe’dlearnedfromMr.Goldthwaiteaboutherfinancialsituation,thetaxesdue,andherfather’sapparentmishandlingofhismoney.She’dpurposely
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omittedthethingsthatinducedhertoblush.
Winnietookthepaper,studiedit,andthenhandeditback.“Itsaysthey’relookingforyoungskinnywiryfellows.Fel-lows,”shesaid,elongatingeachsyllableassheputteredaroundthekitchen,Starlingsoundasleepinhercribbythewindow.“You,Barleigh,whileyoung,skinny,andwiry,couldneverpassasa
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fellow.It’sacrazyidea.Putitoutofyourhead.We’llthinkofsomethingelse.I’llsellanothercow.”
“You’veonlyfourcowsleftandstillhavedairycustomerstothinkof.”
“Withallthemenandboysleavingtojointhearmy,mydairybusinesshasallbutdriedup.Forcryingoutloud,we’llcomeupwithsomethingmorelogicalthanyoupassingyourselfoffasa
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fellow.”“Logicbedamned!”
Barleighthrewahandoverhermouth.“I’msorry,AuntWinnie.Ididn’tmeantocurseatyou.”SheranoverandwrappedherarmsaroundWinnie.“We’dneedtosellawholeherdofcowstocomeupwithenoughmoney.Thisisallthereis.”
“IwishIhadaherdlefttosell.I’dgivethemalltoyou.”
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Barleighheldtheadvertisementup,readingagainthewordsthatwerewrittenforher.“It’sdestiny,thispaperfindingme.”
Winniepointedtothesleepingbaby.“Yourdestiny’scurledupinthatcrib.It’sfollytothinkthatthatadvertisementisyourdestiny.Folly.Pureandsimple.”
*****Laterthateveningasthedark
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housegrewquiet,Barleighlayinbedinthedisconcertingarmsofanothersleeplessnight.Tossingandturning,agauzyvisioncreptin.Stealthy,itsettledagainstherlikeasecretfriend.Wrappedaroundher.Tookshape.Formed.Warmedher.Urgedher.Inspiredher.Sheunderstoodwhatshemustdo.
SheslidoutofbedandtiptoeddownstairstowhereWinniekepther
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midwiferykit.Takingthescissorsinonehand,theotherhandholdingherhairoutstraight,shecut.Chopped.Whacked.Madeanothercut.Thegrowingpileofchestnutcurlsonthefloorlookedlikeasmallsleepinganimal.
Rummagingthroughachifforobe,shefoundsomeclothesthatmusthavebelongedtoJeddy,Winnie’syoungestson,closeenoughtohersize.Shepulledthemon.
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Smudgingthelowerhalfofherfacewithcoal—justalittle—theshadowhintedatthebeginningsofaboy’sfirstbeard.Withabitofingenuityandeffort,she’dtransformedfromBarleighFlanders,nineteen-year-oldlandowneranddebtoroftaxes,intoBarFlanders,not-over-eighteen-year-oldorphanboy,soontobePonyExpressrider,andwillingriskerofdeath.
Sheputonherpapa’s
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blackchurchhat,anditfelloverhereyes.Stuffingtheinsidebrimwithrolled-uppaperkeptitinplace.Themirroronthechifforobereflectedherpassingimageasshestrolledby,stealingglances.Witheachpass,shetriedtoblendhernewreflectionwithhermind’simageofhowherpapawalked.
Assoonasthesmellofcoffeewafteduptoher
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room,sheambleddownthestairs,thumbshookedthroughbeltloops,eyeshalfconcealedwithlow-pulledhat.Shesneakedaroundthekitchenwiththecautionofanimposter,tryingtostitchhershadowtohernewboy-self.
Winnieforkedbaconandeggsontoaplate,herbackturnedasBarleighstoodbehindher.Clearingherthroat,andwithherdeepest,mostmasculinevoiceshe
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couldsummon,shesaid,“I’lltakemycoffeeblack,thankyou.”
“MyGod,”Winniegaspedasshespunaround,ahandclaspedoverherheart.“ForasecondIthoughtitwasoneofmyboys.”
“Butyouknewitwasme.”Sheploppeddownontoachair.Exasperated,heavingafrustratedsigh,shetossedherpapa’shatontothetable.“Istayedupallnight
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practicingmyvoiceandmypersona.Ihavetobecomeaboy.”
“AndIstayedupallnightlastnighttoo,worryingthatyou’dbedoingexactlythat.”Winniesighed.“Whatyou’reproposingtodoisirrational.It’sgoingtobenearimpossiblerollingarockupamountainsosteep.”
“Nearimpossible.Notimpossible.”Sheranherfingersthroughherchopped-
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offhair,theshortnessofitmakingherblueeyesappearlargerinherface.“Please,AuntWinnie?Helpmewiththis?”
Winnietwistedandrubbedherhandstogether,hershouldersliftingandfallingwitheachdeepsigh.“It’srashandfoolishandI’llnodoubtlivetoregretthis.”Shesighedagain.“Thefirstthingwehavetodoisfixthathairofyours.Bringmemy
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scissors,child.”Barleighthrewher
armsaroundWinnie’swaist.“Thankyou.I’dlivetoregretitifIdidn’ttry.”
WinniesettoworkgivingBarleigh’shairaproperboy’scutasshehaddoneforhersonsandherhusband.“There.Muchbetter.Now.Thetoneofyourvoicewasn’tbad,butIknewitwasyoubythewayyoustood.Ifyou’regoingtobea
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boy,youhavetostandwithyourlegsmoreapart,lessfussy,notso,um,notwithyourkneespressedclose,likeyou’rehidinganimportantsecretbetweenthem.”Winnieletoutaheartylaugh.
Barleighstartedlaughing,too,andthelaughtercarriedthemawayforamoment.Dryinghereyes,shesaid,“Thatfeltgood.Laughing.It’ssomethingIusedtotakefor
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grantedbutnowaddtomylistofthingsforwhichI’mgrateful.”
Winniedriedhereyesonthecornerofherapron.“Laughingandcryingbotharegoodforthesoul.”
Barleighthoughtaboutthatforamoment,thinkingshe’dratherlaugh.“WhatelsedoIneedtofix?”
“Well,thewayyou’resitting,alluprightwithyourpelvistiltedforward,back
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arched.Boysdon’tsitlikethat.Sitbackonyourpockets,pelvisrolledbackandrounded,likeyou’recradlingararetreasureinyourlapofwhichyouaremostproud,butpretendcasualindifference.”
Theybothbustedoutlaughing.Snortingthroughnoses,tearsstreamingfromeyes,laughing.
“Andhow’smywalk?”Barleigh
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demonstratedasshemovedfromthetabletothecoffeekettle.
“Toogirly.Turnyoursashayintoasaunter.Slowdownyoursteps.Yes,there,likethat.Andeverynowandthen,scratchyourprivatesandmakeareadjustment.Actasunintentionalaboutit,asifyou’reblowingyournose.”
Barleighfeignedshock.
Winnielookedather,
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eyeswide.“What?”sheasked.“Ahusband,threeboys,anephew,andaslewofranchhands,andIcantellyou,that’swhattheyalldo.”Sheproceededtodemonstrate,exaggeratingeverynuance,thesauntering,thescratching,thereadjusting.
Barleighdoubledoveragaininlaughterthattookherbreathaway.Regaininghercomposure,shegrewserious.
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“IfIleavetomorrowmorning,ridetoLittleRock,catchthestagetoSaintJoe,Icanbetherebytheendofthemonth.But,I’llneedtoborrowahorse.”
Winnie’sbrowwrinkledinconcernandshechewedherbottomlip.“Areyousurethisiswhatyouwanttodo?Onehundredpercentsure?”
“ThisiswhatImustdo.”
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“Iwishtherewasawaytotalkyououtofthis,butIknowthere’snot.I’lltakegoodcareofthatbabysisterofyours,andyourhorse.Youdon’tworryaboutthat,Barleigh.”
“It’sBar.Fromthismomentforward,I’mBarFlanders.”
*****JournalEntry—Tuesday,October15,1860
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Tomorrowmorning,IsetoffonmyjourneytoLittleRock,thenontoSaintJoseph,Missouri.Ihavethisnewjournal,(agiftfromAuntWinnie),threesharpenedpencils,aColtrevolverwithplentyofammunition,andagoodandsteadyhorse,eventhough
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he’saslow,milkwagonhorse.But,heisaccustomedtoworkingallday.I’mcountingonDealbeingwellmendedbythetimeIcomehomeinJanuarytomakemytaxpaymenttothebank.Then,DealandIwillreturntoSaintJoe,continuetoridefortheExpress,thenwhensummercomes,
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ridehomewithlotsofmoneyinmypockettobegintheprocessofbuildingahometoraisemybabysister.
Thisismyplan.
DestinydroppedthePonyExpressway-billatmyfeet.WhatIdowithitisbeyonddestiny—thenextpartisuptome.I’ll
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holdfasttomydreamofsavingmylandandrebuildingtheranch,notthroughanactoffolly,butthroughhardworkanddetermination.I’llridefastandhardtoreachmydestiny’sreward.
Butfornow,sleepiscalling.Whatliesbeyonddestinyisablinkandanod
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away.Yoursever
faithfully, Bar
Flanders
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CHAPTERTWOSEPTEMBER26,1860
Likeagiant,hemovedacrosstheland,eachlongstrideclaimingownershipofthegroundbeneathhisboots.Accordingtotheyardstickthatmeasuresamaninfeetandinches,hestoodsixandtwo,butaccordingtothebenchmarkthatmeasuresamanagainsthispeers,
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HughesLévesquestoodalone.
Theevening’sshadowsandthecoolingnightairmadeturningbacktowardSanAntonioaneasydecision.Hehaddepartedtherivertownearlierthatday,midmorning,halfsober,andfullycommittedtohismissionofpickingupafederalprisonerinFortWorthtoescorthimintothewaitingarmsofjusticeinAustin,
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Texas.Hughes,leanandtaut
withmusclesfirmfromuse,slunghissaddleoverhisshoulderandstartedwalking.HefiguredhewouldmakeitbacktoSanAntoniobysun-up.Hehadn’tgoneveryfarbeforetheoldgeldingupanddiedonhim.Itwould’vebeenthoughtfulofhimtohavepickedabettertimethaninthemiddleofafullgallop,Hughesthought,rubbinghis
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sorebackside.Hewalkedwithaslightlimpfromreceivingthefullimpactofhislandingonthehardscrabbleground.
Cloudsflittedacrossthesilverysliverofamoon,blottingoutthemeagerofferingoflight.Thetrailwasdimandwildlyinhabitedbycoyotesandothernocturnalcreaturesthatprowledintheshadows.Heknewhewasnotalone.He
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wasbeingfollowed.Hughesshortenedhis
strideandemptiedhismindofdistractions.Heslowedhisbreathing,fillinghislungswiththepungentwarmthofthenight,takingnoticeofthenewsmellthathungheavyinthethick,humidair.Hedetectedthesmellofagroupofhorsesflankinghisright—morethanonemarewasinheat.Theridersworebuckskinleggings,justlike
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Okwarausedto.Hughescouldn’tmistaketheodorofhorsesweatonoileddeerskinleather.
Okwara,theskillsyoutaughtmestillcomeinhandy,oldfriend.
Hiseyesdartedleftandrightinavisualsweepofthingsthatmovedintheshadows.Lyingtothesideofthetrail,abranchbrokenoffofamesquitetreeemergedinhisperipheralvision.Afresh
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break.Hescoopeditupwithoutchanginghisstride,snappingoffalonggreenthornfromthebranchtopickatthedirtembeddedunderhisfingernails.
ThecallofanEasternScreechOwlcausedhimtoshakehishead—itshouldhavebeenthesoundofaGreatHornedOwlintheseparts.Acoyoteyipped.Anotheryippeditsresponse.Hughesconsideredthrowing
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hisown“yip”tothewindtoseewhatmighthappen.Hetossedthemesquitethornaside.
Takingstockofhisweapons,hefelttheheftoftheWinchesterrepeatingriflehangingfromhisshoulder,designedbylongtimefamilyfriendBenjaminHenry.Itwasoneofthefirstmodelsproduced,andHughes’sfatherhaditengravedwiththefamilycrestanda
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miniaturesceneoftheirsugarcaneplantationasaspecialgiftforhiseighteenthbirthday.Theengravingwasanicetouch,butitwasetchedwithguilt.HisfatherwouldhavetriedanythingtokeepHughesmarchinginhisfootsteps.
Thecarvedantlerhiltofhislargehuntingknifepressedagainsthislowerbackandwasconcealedunderhisvest,whilehis
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favoriteknife,themuchsmallerRezinBowie,hekeptstrappedtohisleginsidehisrightboot.Itpinchedandchaffedwhenhewalked,butknowingitwastherecomfortedHugheslikeadoubleshotofwhiskey.Usuallyinthesaddleandnotwalkinglikesomefarmer,hecouldignorethemomentarydistress.
Bothofthe.44-caliberblackpowderrevolving
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pistolsholsteredateachhipheldfullrounds,asdidhis.36-caliberNavyColt,whichhekepttuckedinsidehisvestinapockethiddeninthelining.Thesecretpocketwasmadeofredvelvet,craftedandsewninbyhisfavoritewhore,Lydia,whomhethoughtofeachtimehepulledonhisvestandtuckedinhispistol.
Hughesdroppedtothegroundonallfoursjustashe
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heardtheunmistakablesoundofaropehissingandslicingthroughtheair.Hedodgedthefirstlasso,butthesecond,third,andfourthfoundtheirtarget.Yankedtotheground,hekickedlikeawildcat,buthisarmswereboundtighttohissides.Hescrambledtohisfeetbutwassnatchedbackdowntotheground,againandagain.
“Amanisnomatchforfourropes,Texas
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Ranger.”Exceptforthewords“TexasRanger,”whichwerepronouncedwithperfectEnglishandpolishedwithasoftdrawl,therestwastheunmistakablegutturallanguageoftheComanche.
“Icountthreeropesonme,”saidHughes,speakingfluentComancheinreturn.“Thefirstwasthrowntoohighandtooquick.Icouldgiveyougirlssomelessonsonlassoing.Next
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time,you’dneedonegoodropetotakedownyourmaninsteadofthreeorfour.”
Adarkfiguresittingonawhitehorserodeintoview,comingwithinabreathofwhereHugheslayontheground.Thehorsealmoststeppedonhim.Hughesdidn’tflinch.
Thebare-chestedriderworebeaded,fringedbuckskinleggings.Blackandredpaintevenlydividedhis
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faceleftfromrightthroughthemidlineofhisstrong,straightnose.Hishorseboreredandyellowhandprintsoneachhip,themaneandtailadornedwitheaglefeatherstomatchthosewovenintherider’slongblackhair.
“Getup,TexasRanger.”
Hughesscrambledtohisfeet,thetightropesbitingintohisarms.Helookedaround,triedtoassesshow
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manyfiguresonhorsebackhecouldsee.Fourthrowingropesathim,andtheoneonthewhitehorseinfrontmadefive.Notellinghowmanyotherswerehidingintheshadows.
ThemountedIndiansontheotherendoftheropesthatboundhisarmssteppedtheirhorsescloser,givingsomeslacktothebindings.
“Ithoughtwehadyou,TexasRanger,back
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whenyourhorsegrewtiredofcarryingyouanddecidedtodieinstead.Butyouarequicklikeacatandsmartlikeafox.Youhidyourselfawayuntilthemoonsmiled.Thenyoucameoutofyourhidingplacetotravelinthedark,likeawolf.”
“MaybeIamawolf,”saidHughes“Awolfinaman’sbody.”
TheIndiandismountedinonefluid
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movement,sweepinghisrightlegforwardandoverthehorse’sneck,droppingtotheground.Walkingup,hepulledthebadgefromHughes’svest,tossingittothemanbehindhimwholetoutahigh-pitchedlaughashefastenedittotherawhidecatch-ropearoundhishorse’sneck.“AreyoutheTexasRangertheycallHughesLévesque?”heasked,nowspeakingfluentEnglish.
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“Atyourservice.”Hughesgaveaslightnod.
Studyinghimforamoment,theIndianwalkedaroundhim,takinghistime,runningafingerdowntheriflethathunguselessandboundtoHughes’sside.ComingbackinfrontofHughes,theystoodtoetotoe,equalinheight.HetookahardholdofHughes’schin,turninghisfaceleftandright,lookingdeepintohiseyesas
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ifdiviningasecret.“Yes.I’veheardstoriesaboutyou.WecallyouAsgayagagoagatihagudodiwayaagatoli.ManWhoSeesWithWolfEyes.”
“YoushouldcallmeWayaAgatoli,forshort.Beeasiertoremember.”
Hugheshadheardthestories,too.Hislight,amber-coloredeyessparkedmanydiscussions,givingwaytohisLahcotah/Siouannickname.Whostarteditorhowit
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began,hedidn’tknow,butamanwhosawwithwolfeyeswouldberespectedandrevered,ifnotfeared,inmosttribes.
“DoyouknowwhoIam?”ThehandsomeComanchewiththeParisiannoseandgrayeyesthumpedhisbarechestwithhishandsflat,openinghispalmsoutward,showingheheldnoweapon.
“I’veheardaboutyou,
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too,”saidHughes,lookinghimintheeye.“IbelieveyouaretheinfamousIsa-tai,alsoknownasCoyoteVagina.”
High-pitchedlaughterrippledthroughthemountedwarriors,whoquicklyfellsilentexceptforone.Thesquat,pudgyIndianhooted,cackled,andpointed.Hisuncontrolledamusementcausedhimtolistsidewaysinaprecariousslantthatthreatenedtotumblehim
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fromhishorse.Inaflash,theIndian
standinginfrontofHughesspunaroundonhisheels,drewaknifefromhiswaistband,andthenhurledthegleamingbladeatthelaughingwarrior.Hislifeended,hislaughtersilenced,inthatonefluidmove.
Thelarge,barrel-chestedIndianturnedbacktolookatHugheswitheyesthatshowednoemotion.
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Gesturingoverhisshoulderwithhischin,hesaidwithcasualindifference,“HewasCoyoteVagina.Nowhe’sNoMore.”
“MuchtoNoMore’smisfortune.”HugheslookedoveratthedeadIndianlyingonthegroundwhosebloodhadbeguntopooldarkandwetbeneathhim.“Ihadyoumixedup.YoumustbeQuanah,ChiefoftheNoconis.”
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“Atyourservice.”Quanahgaveaslightnod.
“Itmustgettiresome,agreatIndianchieflikeyou,fightingunworthyopponentslikethatdeadmanthere.”
“Thatwasnofight.Ijustkilledhim.Iwastiredofthewayhelaughed.Iwastiredofhimstealingmybreathingair,whichisagifttomefromtheSpiritoftheTrees.”
Thinkfast,Hughes,or
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you’readeadman.“Well,it’stheSpiritoftheStarsthat’sofferingyouagifttonight.”Hughes,hisvoicecalmandsteady,kepthiswolfeyesfocusedonQuanah.
“WhatdoesawhitemanknowabouttheSpiritoftheStars?”
“ThestarisasymbolIwearasmybadge.Butyoutookmystaraway.Now,I’mlikethemaninthemoon.Andlikethestarsthat
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outnumberthemoonupintheheavens,I’malsooutnumbereddownhereontheground.”
“Andthatismygift?”Quanahsnorted.“Wearethemanystarsoutnumberingyourmoon?”
“Lookupatthemoon,Chief.Seehowtheonemoonstilloutshinesthemanystars?Yourgifttonightisthechance,therarechance,tooutshinethemoon.”
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“Youspeaklikeacrazyman.Howdoesastaroutshinethemoon?”
“Byoverpoweringit.Thestarneedsaworthyopponentforitstrueglorytoshine.I’mthatworthyopponent.Loosentheseropes,thenyouandIgohand-to-hand,mano-a-mano.IfIwin,Iwalkawayfree.Ifyouwin,yourstarwillshinebrightandyoucandowhateveryouwanttowith
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me.Butyouwon’thavetorackyourbraindecidingwhichofyourfavoritetorturetrickstoplayonme.ThisfightI’llwin.”
“Youspeaktheboldtalkofamanwhoisusedtowinning.Butmyropesbeatyou.Icouldcutyourheartoutnowandbedonewithit,”Quanahsaid.“Feedittoyoubeforethebloodstopspumping.”
“Where’sthesportin
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that?”Hugheschallenged.“Amandoesn’tcomealongveryoftenwho’sworthyofyou.Showyourwarriorswhataheroicleadertheyhave,onewho’snotafraidtodefythemoonforitsluster.”
“Ihavenothingmoretoprovetomymen,”saidQuanah,walkingpastHughestoconversewithhisthreemountedwarriors,steppingaroundthedeadmanontheground.Theyconversedin
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theirnativetongue,severaltimeslookingoverandlaughingatHughes.
Hugheslistenedintently,pickingupafewwordsthathecouldmakeout—wayaagatoli,hanhepiwi,unze.Seeswithwolfeyes,somethingabouteitherthemoonorhisanus.Whatevertheywerediscussing,hejustwantedhisassoutofthismessandtonotlosehisscalpintheprocess.
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QuanahreturnedtowhereHughesstoodtied.“IwilltakeyouuponyourchallengebecauseIambored.Yoursisaninterestingproposition,oneI’veneverencountered.”HegesturedtotheIndiansbehindhimtoloosenthelassoesfromaroundHughes.“Noguns.Onehandweapon.Ifyouwinandtakemylife,mymenwillspareyoursandletyouwalkfree.IfIwin,Iwilladdyour
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scalptotheoneshangingfrommylance.”
Hughesshooktheropesoffhisarmsandtossedhisgunsaside.“Yourwarriorswillconsideritbadpejutafortheirleadertobeoutmaneuveredanddieinfrontoftheireyes.Seeingbadmedicine,they’llhigh-tailitoutofheretotheLlanoEstacado,wheretheylefttheirfatkidsanduglysquaws.”
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Likeananimalcirclinghisprey,Quanahbegantopace,tossinghistomahawkbackandforthfromhandtohand.“Youwon’thavetofigureanythingafteryou’redead.I’llletmywarriorstakeyourbodybacktotheirfatkidsanduglysquawsforthemtoeat.They’lluseyourintestinestolacetheirmoccasins.”
Withhishuntingknifegrippedinhisrighthand,
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HughesfacedthechiefoftheComanche,pacing,circling,crouchinglow.Hughes’sknifewaslongenoughtobedrawnasasword,heavyenoughtobeusedasaclub,andsharpenoughtopenetratebone.
Thegray-eyedIndianchiefandtheamber-eyedwhitemancircledeachother,staringdowntheiropponent,waitingfortheothertomakeamove,makeamistake,
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blink.Anowlhootedinthedistance.Ahorsewhinnied.Awolfhowled.Quanah’swarriorsbeganalowhum,thenasoftchant,risinginvolumeuntilalltheforestwasalivewithavibratingsongofdeath.
Focus—thinklikeOkwara.Hughesslashedoutwithhisknife.Quanahjumpedsideways,thenlungedforward,bringinghistomahawkdown,landinga
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misplacedblowtoHughes’sleftshoulder.Hughesfeltthestingoftheglancingblowhittinganoldwound,feltthewarmthofbloodonhisarm.Nothingserious.
Chantingvoicesofthewarriorshidingintheshadowsblendedwiththesongsofwarblersandscreechowls,thecoolingnightairfillingwithaneeriechoir.Ontheirknees,theypoundedthegroundwithrocks,stones,a
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treelimb,theirbarehands,anything,creatingarhythmicbeat,strong,repetitive,andloud.
BloodandsweatrandownHughes’sforehead,stinginghiseyes,adeepgashabovehisleftbrowfullofgritanddirt.HelungedatQuanah,knockinghimoffhisfeet.ThenflinginghimselfontheIndian,hepinnedhimtotheground.
Inthedirttheyrolled,
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lockedinadeathduel,panting,grunting,eachmanfightingforhislife,Hughesontoponeminute,Quanahthenext.Then,ontheirfeet,throwingpunches,landingblows,anelbowtotheside,afisttothechin.Pulling,kicking,clawing,theyfoughtlikeanimals.
Quanahbroughtakneeup,swiftandhard,toHughes’sgroin.Hughesstumbledsideways,tryingto
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stayonhisfeet,tokeepbreathingthroughthegut-wrenchingpain.Doubledoveratthewaist,hesawtheIndiandivingtowardhim,tomahawkraised.
Hughesswungupwardwithhisknife,buttendofthehandlefirst.ItstruckagainstQuanah’stemple,knockingthemantohisknees.Withaquickness,Hughesstruckagain,thistimetotheothersideofthe
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head,andQuanahfellsideways,unconscious,tomahawkslippingfromhisfingers,droppingtotherockyground.
Removinghisbelt,HughescinchedQuanah’swrists,bindinghishandstightbehindhisback.HethenrolledQuanahover,faceup.“QuanahParker,chiefoftheNoconis.Youdon’tlooklikemuchmorethananappingbaby.Exceptfortheblood
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coveringyourface.Andthewarpaint.”
Hugheswalkedovertowherehissaddlelaynexttohisgunsandremovedhiscanteen,takinglonggulpsofwater,stillpanting,tryingtocatchhisbreath.HewentbacktoQuanahandstraddledhim,kneltdownwithkneeseithersideofhiswaist,andpouredwaterontotheIndian’sface.Hetossedthecanteenasideandwaited.
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“I’llbethefirstthingyouseewhenyoucometo.”
Coughing,sputtering,Quanahopenedhiseyes,seeingHughesonhiskneesstraddlinghim,armsupraised,bothfistsgrippingtheknife,readytolandthefinalblow.“WayaAgatoli,”hesaid,hisvoicechokedandharsh.“WolfEyes.Youfightlikeawarrior.”
“Iamawarrior.Youfoughtanhonorablefight,
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Chief.Butyoulost.”“Yes.Ilost.Youcan
nowreleasemyspirittothemoon,whostillsmilesonyou.”Quanahcalledouttohiswarriorwhoheldhishorse.“Honormywords.SendWolfEyestorideawayintothelandofnoharm.Myhorsenowbelongstohim.”HelookedatHughesandsaid,“Ourspiritswillfightagaininthesecretworldofthedead.Iwillnotletyou
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winthenextfight.”Hesmiled.“Goaheadnow.Iamready.”
Hughesliftedhisarmshigher,tighteninghisgripontheknife.Withaforcethattookallofhisbreath,heplungedtheknifedownashardashecouldintotheground,inchesfromQuanah’sleftear.
Unflinching,unblinking,unsmiling,Quanah’seyesremained
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focusedonthestars.“MaybeI’drather
fightyouagaininthisworldoftheliving,onadaywhenI’minthemoodtothrowafewpunches.Anhonorableopponentishardtocomebythesedays.”Hughesremovedhisknifethatwashilt-deepinthestonyground.“Thanksfortheuseofyourhorse.Youcancomestealhimbacknexttimeyou’reinSanAntone.”
“IfIhadwon,Iwould
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nothaveletyoulive.ManWhoSeesWithWolfEyesmustbealittleloco.”
“There’reworsethingsinlifethanbeingalittleloco,likebeingalotdead.”Hughesstrappedonhisguns,threwhissaddleontothebackofQuanah’shorse,andbeforemountingsaid,“IthinkI’llkeepthisasasouvenirofourfight.”HepickedupQuanah’stomahawk,lashingittohis
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saddle.“Youcankeepmybeltthat’saroundyourwristsasyours.”
WarmnightairrushedagainsthisfaceasHughesgallopedthewhitestallionsouth.Thecrescentmoonslippedthroughthesilkyskyhighoverheadonitswestwardjourney,ignoringthethincloudsthatstrayedacrossitspath.
*****ThestreetsofSanAntonio
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weredarkanddesertedwhenHughesrodeintotown,fewlampsburninginanybuildingsexceptforthesaloonwherethewindowsneverwentdark.Thepianoplinkedoutatune.Paintedwomenlaughedinbawdypeelsofdelight,cardsslappedthetabletopsfaceup,facedown,andsweettobaccosmokehungthickintheairasseriousmenpuffedfatcigarsandtriedtoout-bluffone
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another.Tyingthehorse’s
reinsaroundthehitchingpostinbetweentwolargeslack-jawed,droopyeared,halfasleepnags,Hughesdismounted,musclesachingfromhisearlierfallandfight.Exhausted,hestrodeintothesaloon,hisspursclinkingontheplankfloorpockmarkedfromyearsofrowel-inflictedwounds.
Heelbowedhisway
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throughthelivelycrowd,backtothebarthathadbeencarvedoutofasingleslabofliveoakwood.Thebarkeepermaintainedtheshellackedsurfacetoahighpolishedgloss,asshinyandreflectiveasthemirrorthathungonthewallbehindit.
“Doublewhiskey,onthedouble,porfavor.”Hugheskeptaclosewatchonthemirror,makingsurenoonesnuckuponhimfrom
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behind.Hepickedupaburntmatchsticksomeonehadtossedasideandbeganscrapingatthedirtandbloodunderhisnails.
“Bythelooksofyou,adoublewon’tscratchthesurface.IthoughtyouwereheadedtoFortWorthtopickupaprisoner,”saidTandyMcMurrough,settingashotglassandtherestofthebottleinfrontofHugheswithonehand,theotherhandbuffing
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outathinsmudgeonthebar.“Was.Ihopehelikes
hisaccommodationsinFortWorth.He’llhavetostayputanotherweekortwo.”
TandyslowedhispolishinghandandeyedHugheswithcuriosity.“Weekortwo?IthoughthewaswantedinAustin.”
“First,IwanttopayavisithometoNewOrleansandgetoneofMother’sfinethoroughbreds.Imissridinga
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goodhorse.Agood,fasthorse.It’sbeenwaytoolongsinceI’vevisitedhome,andwaytoolongsinceI’vehadagood,fasthorse.”
“Youseemedgy,”saidTandy,leaningacrossthebartofilltheshotglass.
“It’sbeenanedgykindofnight,”saidHughes,slingingbackthewhiskey.
“WhathappenedtothatbrownhorseIsawyourideoutonthismorning?”
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“Hewasneithergoodnorfast.Hewasjustahorsewhodecidedatthewrongtimetodie.”
“Thatwasinconvenientofhim,”saidTandy,shakinghishead.
“Haveyoueverriddenareallygoodhorse,Tandy?”Hughessippedhiswhiskey,hiseyeslingeringonthemirror.
Thebartenderponderedthis,pushedhis
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glassesupoffhisthickbulbousnosewithonehand,rubbedtheragaroundonthespotlessbarwiththeother.“Well,letmethinkaboutthat.Irecallonetime—”
“Ifyouhavetothinkaboutit,thentheanswerisno,Tandy.Youhaveneverriddenareallygoodhorse.Amanwhohaseverriddenareallygoodhorseneverforgetsthathorse,thatexperience.Comparesall
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otherhorsestothatone.It’slikemakinglovetoabeautifulwoman,orsippingafine,expensivewine.Thecheaponesneverliveuptothebestofyourmemories.”
“Orfantasies,”saidTandy.“Youhavememories.Menlikemehavefantasies.”
“Well,here’stomemorablefantasies,”Hughessaid,liftinghisshotglassinatoast.
“I’lldrinktothat,”
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agreedTandy,pouringhimselfawhiskey.“Yourfaceandclothesareabloodymess.Whathappened?”
“I’llspareyoutheboringdetails,butIhadarun-inwithanIndianchief.QuanahParkerhimself.Igotawaywithmylifeandhishorse.Helooksveryinconspicuousouttheretiedamongsttheotherrangymounts.”
Tandystopped
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wiping,hisragmotionless.HelookedatHugheswitheyeswide,mouthagape.“YoustoleQuanah’shorse?”heasked,hisvoiceloudabovethenoiseofthecrowd.
Thepianowentsilent.Ahushfelloverthe
saloon.EveryoneturnedcuriouseyesonHughes,wantingtohearthestory.Severalmeneasedthemselvesnearer,afewwomeninfancydresseswith
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feathersintheirhairleanedin,andTandyabsentmindedlybeganpushinghisragincirclesoverthespotlessbar.
“Ididn’tstealQuanah’shorse.YoucouldsayItookhimuponhisgenerousoffer,”saidHughes,pouringhimselfandTandyanotherwhiskey.
“QuanahParkerisamurderer.Hetorturesandscalpsandburnsandsteals.
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Youwantustobelievehebenevolentlyhandedhishorseovertoyououtofthegoodnessofhisheart?”askedJerryAllsup,theobeseblackjackdealer,stillshufflingcardsmidairfromonepudgyhandtotheother,stumpycigarclenchedbetweenyellowteeth.
Hughessippedhiswhiskey,glancingatthemirror,checkinghisback.“Well,Mr.Allsup,our
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murderingchiefdidn’thandhishorseover.Itwasaverbaloffer.Mybelt...”Hughespointedtotheemptyloopsencirclinghiswaistband.“...hadhishandssecuredbehindhisback.Itookhimuponhisofferaftermyhorsedied.SureashellbeatswalkingbacktoSanAntoniointhedark.”
JerryAllsuppressedincloser,hissourtobaccobreathhotinHughes’sface.
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Inaloud,smoker’srasp,hesaid,“Lookslikehealmosthadthebestofyou.Markmywords,butyou’llregretnotkillingthatsonofabitchwhileyouhadthechance.”
Hughesrubbedhisthrobbingleftshoulder,hisshirttornandstiffwithdriedblood.“I’dbeadeadman,minusmyscalp,ifI’dkilledQuanah.Hiswarriorswould’veseentothat.”Asfarasregrettingnotkillingthe
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chief,Hughesconsideredregretssomethingoldmensittingonporchesinrockingchairshadtimetofretover.Rightnow,itwastimetopayTandyforhisfinewhiskeyandmakehiswaytotheMengerHotel.Ahotbathandhisbedwaswaiting.
“Icanhelpyouwiththatnastygashonyourhead,”whisperedasweetvoice,asmall,softhandstrokingthesideofhisface,
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brushingthedarkhairbackawayfromhisambereyesandoffhisforehead.Thewoundoverhislefteyewascakedwithdirtanddriedblood.
“Lydia,mylovely,”saidHughes,takingherhand,kissingit.“Whatanicesurprise.IwasthinkingaboutyouwhenIwascheckingmypistolbeforeIgotsidetrackedbyanIndianchief.”
“Ioftenfindmyself
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thinkingaboutyouandyourpistol,”teasedLydia,herlargebrowneyessparkling.Sheworeherthick,blondcurlspiledhighonherhead,pinnedinplacewithagoldanddiamondbarretteintheshapeofastar,agiftfromHughes.
“Isthatafact?”Hesmiled,dimplesframinghissensuousmouth.
“Afact,”shesaid,battingherlashesinacoy,
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shyfashionbeforespoutingrigidinstructions.“Tandy,Mr.Lévesque’sdrinksareonthehousetonight.SendnextdoorforOmaKleintocomeoverandrunahotEpsomsaltsbathandbringsomebandagingmaterials.HaveLittleBillyunsaddlethathorseoutthereandtakehimdowntotheliveryyard.Idon’twantthatpaintedIndianponystandinginfrontofmysaloonscaringawaybusiness.
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BringHughes’ssaddleinandleaveitbehindthebarforsafekeeping.”
“Yesma’am,MissLydia.Anythingelse?”askedTandyashesentBillyouttotakecareofthehorse.
“Yes.Sendupabottleofchampagne.Twoglasses.”LydiatookHughesbytheelbow,leadinghimfromthebar.“Ihavesomedoctoringtodo.”
Hughessmiled,
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allowingLydiatopullhimaway.“Iloveanin-chargewoman,especiallyonewhoownsasaloonandcannurseaman’swounds.”
LittleBilly,thetwelve-year-oldorphanwhomLydiahaddiscoveredthepreviouswintershiveringunderthebackporchofthesaloon,flea-coveredandstinkyasanabandonedpup,burstthroughtheswingingdoors,carryingHughes’s
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saddle.“Mr.L-L-Lévesque!Thathorsea-a-a-ain’toutth-th-there,”hestutteredinaloud,excitedgushofwords.“Ain’tnoIndian’sh-h-horseoutthere.J-J-Justyoursaddlelayingonthegr-ground.”
Hughesranoutofthesaloondoors,followedbyLydia,Tandy,andtheotherswhocrowdedaroundthehitchingpost,staringatthevacatedspotwhereHugheshadtiedthewhitestallion.
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ThetomahawkhehadkeptasasouvenirfromhisfightwithQuanahwasnowembeddedinthewoodenrail,hisbeltswingingfromtheweapon’shandleasifithadjustbeentossedtheremomentsago.
Theemptystreetheldnosignofthewhitestallion,orofthechief,oroftheotherwarriorswhorodewithhim.Notevenaspeckofdusthunginthequiet,stillair.Thecrowdpressedtogether,
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lookingleftandright,searchingforaclue.Therewasnone.
“Itappearsthatourvisitorsdidn’tcaretostickaround,butI’mhappyhereturnedthis.”Hughesthreadedhisbeltthroughtheloops,tighteningthebucklethatborehisfamily’screst.TheheirloomsymbolwasasmallgoldfleurdeliscenteredinfrontofalargersilverMaltesecross
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embeddedonabackgroundofblackonyx,itsborderathinlineofcrushedredrubies.“I’mfondofthisparticularbuckle.”
“Howrudeofourvisitorsnottostay.Oh....Youhadanothertoday,”saidLydia,feigningrevelation.“She’sstayingattheBrazosGuestHouse.OmaKleintoldmethatsheputherintothemastersuitenexttotherosegarden.Omaneverletsjust
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anyonestayinthemastersuite.Yourvisitormustbeimportant.”
Hugheslookedperplexed.“She?Myvisitor?Didsheleaveaname?”
Lydiateasedoutthenarrative.“Sheindicatedthatshewasanoldfriendofyours.ItoldheryouleftforFortWorthandIdidn’tknowhowlongyou’dbegone.Shewasverypretty,butthinandfrail.Shelookedill.”
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Hughesraisedhisbrowsincuriosity.“Anoldfriendofmine?Here?InSanAntonio?”
“Yes,”saidLydia,peeringupatHughes,whotoweredafootaboveherhead.“Asomewhatolderlady,yetlovelynonetheless.ShesaidhernamewasLeighselleBeauclaire.”
Hughesstopped.“Leighselle?HereinSanAntonio?MyGodifthat
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doesn’ttakemeback.Ihaven’tseenherin,hell,almosteightyears.”
“Areyouhappythatshe’shere?”Lydiapouted,hervoicethinwithjealousy.
“Happy—yes.Andcurious.Shewaslikeabigsistertome.ShesavedmylifemanyyearsagowhenIleftNewOrleans.”
“Savedyourlife?Thatfrailthing?How?”
“Bytellingacrafty
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lie.”HughestookLydiabytheelbowandescortedherinside,asliverofasmiletwitchingthecornersofhismouth.
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CHAPTERTHREESEPTEMBER27,1860
Leighsellesatstraight-backed,high-chinned,andperchedontheedgeofherchair,aqueenpresidingoverhercourt.ShereignedattheheadofanemptytablethattookupmostofthespaceinthesunnybreakfastroomattheBrazosGuestHouse.Herblackwoolenshawlwas
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pulledtightaroundherthinshouldersdespitethewarmbreezethatflutteredtheginghamcurtains.Thewindowswerethrownwidetothegardentoinviteinthescentofmuskrosethatperfumedthemorningair.
Sippingfromherteacupwithherlefthand,pinkyfingerextended,herrighthandlaytuckedinherlap.Initsheclutchedablacksilkandlacehandkerchief
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embroideredwithherinitialsinboldredscript.Thelongskirtofherblackreceivingdresspuddledatherdaintyfeet,whichwerebuttonedupinfashionableleatherboots.Darkmourningcolorssheworenottoshowaladyinbereavement.Shepreferredyellow,eventhoughyellowwasthecolorofheryouth.Shechosedarkfabricsasapracticalmatter.Itwaseasierhidingthespecklesofblood
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thatoftenaccompaniedhercoughthesedays.
“MissBeauclaire,yourgueststandsatthedoor.”OmaKleinsteppedintotheentrywayofthebreakfastroom,hercurlywhitehairspringingfromherheadliketightlywoundspoolsofwire,hersofthazeleyessparklingwithcuriosityassheregardedherlodger.“Ja,helooksmuchbetterthanwhenherodeinlast
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night.HardtotellitwasMr.Lévesqueunderneaththatbloodanddirt.”
AcoughtickledLeighselle’sthroat.Shefoughttorepressit,dreadingthequakingspasmsthathadgrownmoretroubling.“Bloodanddirt?Myheavens.Please,showhimin.Andbringsomemoreteaifit’snottoomuchtrouble.”
“Ja,noproblem.”OmaKleinretreatedintothe
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kitchen,returningholdingatrayheapingwithanassortmentofpastriesandstrudels,aclean-scrubbed,fresh-shavenHughesLévesqueonherheels.
HugheslookedatLeighselleandsmiled,hisambereyescrinklingatthecorners.Hetookbothofherglovedhandsinhisandkissedeachone.“You’reaslovelyasthelasttimeIsawyou,Leighselle.WhenIleft
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NewOrleansforgood,youmadesureIlandedonmyfeetinsteadoflandingmyselfinjail,orworse.”
“NooneeverleavesNewOrleansforgood.You’llbedrawnbacksomeday.It’sbeentoolong,Hughes.Youlookwell.Handsome.You’renotthescrappyyouthIremember.”
“Alotchangesineightyears.”Hepulledupachairandsetnexttohisdear
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oldfriend,alookofworryandcuriosityonhisface.
Andsomethingsneverchange,thoughtLeighselle,somethingsliketheheartacheofalifetimeofshamefulsecrets.Acoughbubbledupandshehelditbackwithherhandkerchiefandkeptitinhermouth,justasmallsoundescapingthistime.
Leighsellesmiled.“You’vefilledoutand
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hardenedaroundtheedges,butitsuitsyou.”
“BesidestutoringmeinGerman,Omafeedsmewonderfulpastries.Shewantstofattenme,”Hugheslaughed.“ItutorherinEnglish.TheGermansinsistonpronouncingeveryletter,so,sheevengettingmynamerightwasachallenge.Ihadtospellitforheras‘HuLeVek’beforesheunderstoodthepronunciation.”
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“You’vealwaysexcelledinuniquelinguistics.Itwasbirdcallsandwildanimalsoundswhenyouwereaboy,andofcourse,French.ThenCreoleandNavajodialects,fromwhatIremember.AnyotherlanguagessincecomingtoTexas?”
“Spanish.Comanche.Afewothertribalvernaculars.Itcomesinhandyonthejob.”
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Hughestappedthefive-pointstarpinnedtohisvestlapelwithalookofpride.Itwasforged,likeallRangersbadges,fromasilverMexicanpeso.Asessentialasaknifeoragun,aTexasRanger’sbadgeopeneddoorsquickerthanapoliteknockoraforcefulkick.
AsHughesspoke,Leighsellestudiedhisface.Sheconsideredhissquarejaw,thefineangularslantto
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hisnose,hisintense,wide-setambereyes,andshetookinthewaythesunlightstreaminginthewindowbroughttolifethehoneygoldstrandsthatglistenedinhisdarkbrownhair.
Hiscountenanceremindedherofalion,powerfulandmajestic,althoughinHughes’scase,almosttoohandsometobedangerous.Butsheknewbetter.Sheknewthetruth
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behindthesensuoussmile,themanicurednails,thescholar’svocabulary,andthewell-placedmanners.Hewasagentleman,yes,butdangerousandcapableofaudaciousdeeds.
“It’sdifficultformetoreconciletheprecociousyoungboyfromNewOrleanswiththisrough-and-tumblelawmansittingbeforeme.”Leighsellelaughedatthememory.“Notonetobetold
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‘no,’youkeptshowingupatmysaloonuntilonedaywetiredofchasingyouaway.Oh,howmygirlsdotedonyou.”
“I’mnotalwaysrough-and-tumble,wearingthisbadge.”Heleanedinclose.“Itellyoualittlesecret.Sometimes,whennotRangering,I’memployedbyourfederalgovernment.Itakecareofbusinessthatothersdon’twantto.”
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“Everthechevalier,”shewhispered.Therewasnopointinaskingorinsayinganymore.Sheassumedhe’dsharedwithherasmuchashewasabletodivulge.
Aviolentcougheruptedwithasuddenforcethatwrackedherbody,bendingherforward,shakinghershoulders.Herentirebodyheavedasshefoughttocatchherbreath.Leighsellecoveredhermouthwithher
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blackhandkerchief,wipingatspecklesofbloodshefearedmarredherface.
“Mydear,areyouallright?”Hugheswasatherside,pattingherback,thenhetookthehandkerchieffromheranddabbedatthebloodthatstainedthecornersofhermouth.“Here,sipsometea.CanIgetyousomethingelse?”
“No.No,I’mfine.Thankyou.”Hershoulders
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roseandfellinslowmotionasshetookdeepbreaths,tryingtorefillherlungs.
“Ladieswhoarefinedonotcoughblood.There’sadoctorinresidenceattheMengerHotelwhereIkeeparoom.I’llsendforhim.”Worrywasetchedindeeplinesonhisforehead.
“No,pleasedon’ttroubleyourself.Moreteawouldbelovely.”Thesmileshegavewasweakand
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unconvincing.“Youshouldletme
sendforthedoctor,Leighselle.Thatcoughconcernsme.”
“It’stoolateforadoctor,Hughes.”Shecuppedahandoverhis,herpleadingeyestellinghimtoletgooftheidea.“Mydoctoradvisedthatthereisnothingmoretodoshortofeasingmypain.”
Hughesswallowed,andthentookherhandsin
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his.“Isthatwhyyou’rehere,Leighselle?Didyoucometoseemeonelasttime?Ishouldhavecomeback—”
“IcametoSanAntoniotoaskafavorofanoldfriend.Yourbrothertoldmewheretofindyou.Ididn’twanttowrite.Iwantedtoseeyou,toaskyoufacetoface.Ineedyourhelp,Hughes,intracking—”AnothercoughevenworsethanthefirstrattledLeighselle’semaciated
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body,hertinyframeseeminglikeitmightbreakintwo.“Pleaseexcusemycoughing.Todayistheworstsofar.”
“Wouldsittingoutsideinthefreshairhelp?”Hughesofferedheraglassofwater.
Sippingit,shenodded.“Itwould.Let’stakeashortstroll.”
HughestookLeighsellebythearmandsteeredheroutside,wherethewarmthofthelate
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September’smorningsunshinehintedatanafternoonsuitableforsiestas.AnumbrellastandthatOmakeptonthefrontporchheldaladiesparasol.Hughesopenedit,carryingitoverLeighselle’shead,shieldingherfromtheraysoftheTexassun.Theywalked,unhurried,arm-in-arm,passingbytheSpanishMissionwheretheBattleoftheAlamohadoccurred.
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AstheystrolledtheesplanadethathuggedtheSanAntonioRiver,HughespointedouttheMengerHotelwherehekeptaroom.ItwasaconspicuousEuropean-lookingbuildingamidSpanishColonialarchitecture,thankstoaGermanimmigrantwhobuiltthehotelnexttohisbeerbrewery.
“Whatagrandbuilding.Iwouldverymuchliketotouritlater,”
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Leighsellesaid,acceptingtheofferedchairthatHughespulledoutforher.
Adjacenttothehotel,aclusteroftablessatunderthesweepingarmsofcypresstreesthatlinedtheriver’sbanks.HughespulledachairandsatacrossfromLeighselle.“Asyouwish.”
Amandressedinagraymorningcoatwithagleamingwhitetoweldrapedoveronearmapproached.
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Hughesgreetedhimwithasmile.“Hello,Jameson.ThisisadearfriendofminefromNewOrleans,MissLeighselleBeauclaire.Shewasmorelikeabigsister,really.”
“Pleasedtomakeyouracquaintance,MademoiselleBeauclaire.”Jamesonbentatthewaist.
“Enchantée.”Leighsellesmiledandnodded,impressedwith
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Jameson’smannersandFrenchpronunciationofhername.
“Bringustwolemonades,ifyouwill,Jameson.Asmallshotofwhiskeyonthesideforme,”Hughesrequested.
Leighsellehelduptwofingers.
“Makethattwoshotsofwhiskey,Jameson,andalsosendwordtoDoctorSchmidtthatI’dlikea
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momentwithhim,athisconvenience.”HugheswinkedatLeighselle.
“Ofcourse,Mr.Lévesque,rightaway,sir.”Jamesonbent,whisperingsomethingtoHughes,whileatthesametimetuckinganoteintoHughes’svestpocket.Then,turningonhisheels,hemarchedawaywithbrisk,purposefulstrides.
Hughessaid,“Please,indulgeme.”
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“Thereisnothingadoctorcan—”
“Please?Indulgeme.LetDoctorSchmidthavealookatyou.What’veyoutolose?”
“Time.AcommodityofwhichIhavepreciouslittle.But,I’llagreetoseeyourdoctorjustsoyouwillfeelbetter.”
“Thankyou,”henodded.“You’lllikeDocSchmidt.He’swellrespected.
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And,he’sanavidthoughratherineptpokerplayer.Ifnothingelse,youmightpersuadethegooddoctortocutthecardswithyou.Whoknows,youmaywalkawaywithalittlespendingmoney.Maybegobuyyourselfanewpetticoat,parasol,orpistol.”
“Ihaveplentyofundergarmentsandumbrellas,butanewlittlepocketDerringermightbefun.”Leighselle’slaughmelted
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intoablood-redcough,herthinshouldersliftingwiththeweightofeachspasm.
JamesonreturnedwithatrayofrefreshmentsandanewfoldednoteforHughes.AfterpouringthelemonadeintotalltumblerswithsugaredrimsandservingthedarkamberOldCrowinshortcutcrystalwhiskeyglasses,hesteppedbackandclaspedhishandsinfrontofhim,waitingforfurther
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instructions.“Excuseme,
Leighselle.Thisneedsmyattention.I’llbejustamoment,”saidHughesasheputthesecondnoteintohisvestpocket.
“Ofcourse,”shesaidasshepouredthewhiskeyintoherglassoflemonade.“Ihaveasuspicionthatthiswilltreatacoughbetterthanteawithlemonandhoney.”
“Fixmineuplikethat,
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too,ifyouwill.I’llberightback.”Hughessteppedawayfromthetable,Jamesonfollowing.
Leighsellewatchedastheysteppedintotheshadeofthewalledpatioatthesideofthehotel,Jamesonspeaking,Hughesattentive.Hughestookthenotesfromhisvest,lookedateachone,noddedhishead,andhandedthembacktoJameson,whothenmarchedaway,disappearing
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fromviewintothedarkdoorsofthehotel.
Hughesreturnedtothetable,apologizing.“Ihopeyou’llforgivetheinterruption.”Hesatandleanedbackinhischair,takingasipofthepotentlemonadeconcoction.“Mmm.Refreshing.Intoxicating.Thismaybecomemynewfavoritebeverage.”
“It’smine,withouta
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doubt.”Shewaitedforamoment,wonderingwhetherornotHugheswouldvolunteeranythingaboutthesecretivenotes,butdecidedthathewouldnot.MenlikeHugheskeptsecrets.Womenlikeherunderstood.
“Allright,mydear,youhavemyundividedattention.”Heleanedforward,elbowsonknees,fingerstented,eyesalertandonhers.“Tellmewhatfavor
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youcameallthiswaytoaskofme.”
Leighsellebroughtherhandkerchiefuptohermouthanticipatingacough,butitnevermaterialized.“Mustbethenewmedicine,”shesaid,sippingherdrink.“Icameheretoaskyoutohelpmefindmydaughter.”
“Yourdaughter?”Hughesleanedbackinhischair,shakinghishead.“Ididn’tknowyouhada
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daughter.Andshe’slost?”“Onlyafewpeople
knewIhadachild.Mostofthem,ifnotallofthem,aredeadnow.Andshe’snotlost.Shewastakenfrommewhenshewasaninfantjustdaysold.Iwasdruggedandblackmailedintogivingherup.It’ssuchalong,complicatedstory,I...Idon’tknowwheretostart.”
“Atthebeginning.Startthere.”Hughesleaned
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forward.Hetookherglovedhandinhis,givingitagentlesqueeze.
“Thebeginning.Iwasfifteen.MyfathersoldcattletoaTexasrancher.Hewasn’taTexan.HewasanIrishimmigrantwhosettledinTexas.HewouldcometoourranchinVermillionParishtopurchaseourpure-bredBrahmancattleandhavethemshippedtohisranchinCorpusChristiontheTexas
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GulfCoast.”Hugheslistened,
watchingLeighselle’sconfidentpostureweakeningasshespoke,herhandstwistinganduntwistingthelacehandkerchiefinherlap.
“Hevisitedseveraltimesayear,andeverytimeIwouldcatchhimstaringatme.Longstares,notcasualglances,butvulgarstaressointensethatIfelthiseyesleftastainonmyskin.”
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“Yourfatherandmother—didtheynoticehisunusualattentiontoyou?”
“Yes.Mothercouldn’tstandtobeinhispresence.ShewouldmakesureIwaskeptbusyupstairswithmytutororsomeplaceoutofsight.Fathertoleratedhimbecausehewasarichcattlemanandwasgoodforbusiness.Fathertalkedaboutbuyingmoreland,aboutimportingmorebulls.He
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couldn’taffordtoturnawayawealthyclient.”
“Didhehurtyou,ortrytohurtyou?”Hughes’svoiceloweredanddarkened.
Leighselle’seyesbrimmedwithtears.“It’sbeensolongsinceI’vespokenofwhathappenedatVermillionBay.”
*****August,1836
Rustyredsoilclungtotheslipperybanksofthe
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VermillionRiver,whichflowedintothetepidcoastalwatersofVermillionBay,theriversnakingitswaysouthbeforespillingitsmurkyironoreintotheGulfofMexico.Therichdirtoozedablackish,brick-redslime.Seasonaltidalwaterspushedinlandandcreptupstreamthroughthemarshlands,attimescausingtherivertoappeartorunbackwardandheadnorthtowarditssource,
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asiftheriverwasswallowingitselfinonethirstygulp.
EverythinginthesmallLouisianaparish—theriver,thebayou,thebay,eventheparishitself—claimedthename“Vermillion,”whilethevermillionironoreclaimedtheair,thewater,theland,theanimals,anythingelsethatstoodstilltoolong,tintingallwithinitsreachinvaryingshadesofred.
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ArmandandJeanineBeauclaire’sonlychildwasneverstilllongenoughforthecolorredtoclaimher.LeighselleLaVerneBeauclairewasanactivegirl,andtheminutesspentsittingstillwereminuteswasted.Shehatedsittingstill;stillnesswasnotsomethingforwhichshehadanypatience,andshehatedthecolorred.
“Ipreferyellow,
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Mama,likethesunflowers.”“Thenyoushall
alwayswearyellow,”herdotingmotherwouldproclaim.
Leighsellewasawareofhowthesun’syellowrayscoulddistractherfromtheuglinessofVermillionParish,whereeverythingwasadusty,rustyred.Asshegrew,Leighsellealsogainedakeenawarenessofhowitfelttodistractamanfromhis
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business,thoughnotthroughaffectation.Atthejuncturewhenayounggirlcrossesovertowomanhood,shewasanaturalbeauty.Chestnuthairfellinsilkywavespastthesmallfullnessofherhips.FlawlessporcelainskinprovidedapaletteonwhichtoshowcasepinkCupid’sbowlips.Astraight,narrownoseturnedupafractionofadegreeatthetipandseemedtopointupwardtohermost
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dramaticfeature:gold-fleckedemeraldgreeneyesthatedgedonthesideofbeingtoolargeforherface.Fringedinthickebonylashesthatgrewthickerandlongerattheoutercorners,theeffectwasfeline.
SeamusFlanders,anIrishimmigrantwhosettledinTexasandconductedbusinessinVermillionParish,wasnotimmunetohercharms,despitethetwentyyearsthatseparatedthem.His
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businessdealingswithLeighselle’sfathercouldhavebeenaccomplishedinasingleyearlyvisit,buthecametoVermillionParishmoreoften,lookingforanyexcuse,purchasingmorecattlethanwhatheneeded,becauseitmeantanotherchancetoeyetheobjectofhisdesire.
Ontheoccasionswhenhewouldinsinuatehimselftobeaninvitedguestforameal,hewouldstudy
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Leighselleasifshewereanobjetd’artmeanttobeinspectedandadmired.Hisintensestaresandundueattentionmadeheruncomfortable.Shecouldn’thelpbutnoticethatduringthosetimes,heoftenkepthishatstrategicallyplacedacrosshislap.
*****Leighselleandherlittledog,asmallwhiteterrierwithbrownearsandabrownspot
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attherootofitstail,skippeddowntowardtheriverbridge.Hermotherhadpromisedthatshecouldhaveaswimandapicnicifshewasagoodgirlandcompletedherlessonsfortheday.
Thewoodsthickened.Itbecamedarkandcooldespitetheheatfromthenear-noon-daysun.Leighsellestoppedattherockwheretheothershadtakenofftheirdressesandtookhers
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off,too.Splashingintothewater,herwhiteskinwasalmosttranslucentcomparedtothenut-brownskinofthetwoslavegirlswhosplashedandplayedalongsideher.
“Wesupposedtobedyingthemlinens,MissLeighselle.IfMassahBeauclairecatchesusaswimmingandnotaworking,hesureenoughgoingtobemad.”Addy-Frankdoveintothewater,Estherfollowing.
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“IcanhandleFather.I’lltellhimthatIwasdrowningandthatyoubothjumpedintosaveme.He’llawardbothofyouaworkpassforsnatchinghisdaughterfromthejawsofdeath.”
“Heain’tgoingtobelieveawordathat.”Addy-FrankandEsthersplashedLeighsellewhileJacques,thelittlewhiteterrier,racedalongtheshoreline,barking.
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TheexpensiveivorylinensimportedfromParisfloatedintubsofocherwatermadedeepmustardyellowbyanabundanceofironoxideinthesoil,themineral-richdirtatreasurehiddeninsecretpocketsalongtheriverbank.
WhereeverythingelseinVermillionParishwasredfromtheprevalenthematite,thesoilintheinletwherethegirlsbathedandwashedclotheswasinfusedwiththe
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yellows,oranges,andbrownsofocher.Usingthemineralaspigment,colorantsweremadetodyethelinensandotherfabricsoftheBeauclairehouseholdinbeautifulshadesofyellow.
“Comeon.Webestbegettingbackwiththemlinens.Youmamatellustohavethempinnedtotheline’forenoonsothesuncanbakethatcolorrightin,”saidAddy-Frank.
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“Goonbackwithoutme.I’mstayingalittlelonger.”Leighselle,chestdeepintheslow-movingwatersoftheVermillion,flungherheadbackwardandforward,streamingasprayofwaterfromherlonghairontothebankwhereJacquesjumpedandbarked,tryingtocatchthewaterdropletsinhismouth.Leighselleandthegirlslaughedatthelittledoginhistirelessefforts,jumping
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manytimeshisheightintotheair.
“IreckonthatbeOK,MissLeighselle,butdon’tyoubetoolong,”saidAddy-Frank.“Yourmamagetworriedifyouain’thome’forelunch.”
“Ibroughtapicniclunch.Mother’snotexpectingmebackuntillater.”Leighsellesplashedthegirlsastheyscamperedoutoftheriver,Jacquestwistingand
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twirlingintheair,barkingatthewaterdropletsastheysankintothesand.Scratchingandrootingwithfuriousenergy,Jacquestriedtogettowherethewaterdropletdisappearedfromview,hispawsandnoseturningabrightocheryellow.
Afterthegirlshurriedawaywithoneofthetubsoflinens,Leighsellesatonthebankoftheriver,rubbingthewarmochersandontoher
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legsandarms.“Jacques,look.I’mnotwhiteanymore.I’myellow,likeyournose.IthinkI’llstayyellowtherestofmylife—it’ssuchafinecolor.Muchbetterthanred.WhenI’mold,Ishallasktobeburiedinayellowdress.”
Pullingonherlaceunderslip,shereachedintothesmalltote,bringingoutasandwich.Shehalvedit,givingthegenerousportiontoJacques.Itdisappearedinan
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instant.“Wemustworkonyourmanners,petitchien.Maybeteachyoutosaypleaseandthankyou.”
“IfIsayplease,willyouletmekissyou?Or,willIhavetotakewhatIwant?”Seamuswasonherinaninstant,grabbingherfrombehind,clappingahandoverhermouthbeforeherscreamwasout.Hepushedherontothewetsand,pinninghertothegroundwithhisweight.
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Leighsellestruggledbutwaspowerlessagainstthebruteforceofamanintentontakingwhathewanted.
Hishotbreathpantedagainstthebackofherneck,hiswords—grunts—groansloudinherear.Shewrenchedoneofherarmsfreefromunderher,clawedbackwardathisface,hishands,buthepinnedherarmagain.Rippingatherunderslip,hisroughhandsscratchedand
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bruisedhertenderflesh.Jacquesracedin
circles,barking,lunging,bitingathisbootleg,grabbingthefabricinhisteeth,pullingbackward.Seamusshookthelittledogoff,thenkickedhard,bootinghimasolidblowtotheside.Jacqueslandedinthesand,quiet,unmoving.
Leighsellescreamed.Hishandoverhermouthmuffledhercries.Themore
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shestruggled,therougherhegot.“Iseethewayyoulookatme,teasingme,beggingmeforthis.It’sinyoureyesthatyouwantmetofuckyou.Sayit.Sayyouwantmetofuckyou.”
Leighselleshookherhead,frantic,triedtosayno,triedtoscream,buthishandclampeddownonhermouthagain.Sandcloggedhernostrils,gratedhereyes.
“You’remine,
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Leighselle.Aftertoday,nooneelsewillwantyou.You’llbelongtome.”Seamustookherintheroughestwayhecould.“Doyouunderstand?Mine.”
Painrippedthroughherbody.Witheachpushandshove,Leighsellefeltasifshemightslipintounconsciousness—sheprayedthatshewould.Asilentcryformedinherthroatandstayedthere,eventhoughher
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mouth,wideopeninhorrorandfear,allowedforitsrelease.
AnoisecomingfromthetrailleadingdowntotheriverdrewSeamus’sattention.HepressedhishandhardagainstLeighselle’smouth,anditcoveredhernose.Shestruggledtobreathe.
“Weforgotonebasketofyourmama’slinens,”saidAddy-Frankasshestepped
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fromthedenseovergrowthofthetrailontothesun-drenchedbank.“Thebigol’heavyone.MassahBeauclairesayhegoingtosendOleIsaiahdownwiththewagontoliftit’causeitbe—Oh!”Shestoppedmidstride,frozen,hereyestakinginthehorriblescene.
SeamusshovedawayfromLeighselle,fasteninghisbelt,thenslippedlikeashadowintothedarknessof
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thethicket.Momentslater,theclatteringofhoovesechoeddownintotheravineashegallopedacrossthewoodenspan.Theloudcommotionflushedamurderofnestingcrowsintothesky.
Addy-Franksplashedacrosstheriver,grabbingLeighselle,pullingherupoffthesand.“Whathedonetoyou?Hehurtyou?”
Leighselleopenedhermouthbutnowordsformed.
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Noonecouldeverknowaboutthis.Noone.ShepulledawayfromAddy-Frank’sgraspandtuggedatthetornslipthatwasrippeddownthefront,tryingtocoverherself.
“Whodonethis?Youknowhim?”Addy-FrankgrabbedLeighselle’sshoulders.“Who?”
“HecomesfromTexastobuycattle.”Leighsellebegantoshake,asoundlikethatofaninjured
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doverisingsoftlyfromwithin.“Icouldn’tstophim.Itriedtostopit,butIcouldn’t.”
“Yourdaddy’sshotgunsurestophim.IgogetMassah.”
“No!Youneversawanything.Father—hisbusiness.Wecan’tspeakofthistoanyone.It’llshamehim.He—”
“MissLeighselle,youneedtotellyour—”
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“Tellnoone.Gobacktothehouselikeyouneverleft.”
Addy-Frankopenedhermouthtospeak,hesitated,andthenwalkedbackupthetrailtowardthehouse,leavingtheriverbehind.
LeighsellekneltbyJacques,whowaswhimpering,hispawstwitching.Shestrokedthedog’sside,feelingforbrokenribs.“You’llbeallright.Lay
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still,littledog,andcatchyourbreath.”
Steppingintothewarmcurrent,shelocatedthelargeflat-toppedboulderthatsatsubmergedafewinchesunderthewater’ssurface,therocksheplayedonanddovefrom—therockthatsnappingturtlessunnedthemselvesonandwherefrogswouldsitandcatchdragonflies.
Shelaydownontherock,lettingthewarm,slow-
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flowingwatersoftheVermillionwashtheochersandfromherhair,fromherskin,fromherslip.Sheimaginedthewaterwashingawaythehorridnightmare,flowingitouttosea.
Leighselleclosedhereyesagainsttheglaringsun,againsttheindigosky,againsttheredriver,againsttheochersandandsunflowersbendingoverthebanks,andagainstallthatwasfineand
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vibrant.Nothingwouldeverbefineorvibrantagain.Somethingdied.Itwasthedeathofyellow.
*****“MyGod,Leighselle.Iwanttokillhim.”Hughespushedbackfromthetable,knockinghischairoverashemovedtoherside,crouchingdownnexttoher.“Tellmewherethismonsteris.I’llputabulletintohisblackheart.Thatsonofabitchisadeadman.”
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Leighsellecoughedintoherhandkerchief,pattedeachcornerofhermouthclean,andthentookasipoflemonade.“IfIrecall,defendingawomanwhohadbeenbrutalizedbyamanwaswhatledyoutofleeNewOrleansinthefirstplace.”
“Thatwasn’tamanwhobrutalizedMonique.Thatwasananimal.Sowasthecreaturewhoattackedyou.”Hughesdroppedhisfist
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harddownonthetable,thesilverwareclattering.“Nothingtightensmyjawfasterthanseeingamanhurtawoman.Ihadagutfullofthatasakid,seeingmymothercowerfromherownhusband.”
“Whathappenedtomeseemsalifetimeago.IdohaveanideaastowhereSeamusFlanderslives,ifindeedhe’sstillliving,butit’snothimIwantyouto
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find.It’smydaughter.”“Yourdaughterwould
beclosetomyage,then,orafewyearsolder,”Hughessaid.
“Oh,no.Thatdespicableincidentdidn’tresultinapregnancy.Seamusisnotthechild’sfather.He’sthechild’sgrandfather.IfellinlovewithSeamus’sson,Henry,butIwasn’tawareoftheconnection.HenryhadjustarrivedinAmericaatthe
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PortofOrleansfromIreland.Itoldyouitwascomplicated.”
“That’sputtingitmildly.”Hughesrightedhistoppledchair,takingaseatclosetoLeighselle.
“Indeed.And,allthatIjusttoldyouistheeasypartofthestory.”
“Theeasypart?GoodGod.”HughesshookhisheadandgaveLeighsellealong,hardlook,hiseyesmoving
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slowlyoverherthinface.Heremeraldgreen
eyeswerejaundiced,sunken,andaccentuatedbydarkcirclesunderneath.Theangularsharpnessofhercheekbonesprotrudedfromparchmentpaperskin.Lips,oncesuppleandpink,weredrawnintoathin,painedslitinanattemptatbarringthecoughsfromescaping.
“Didyouevermarryorhaveafamilyofyour
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own?”sheasked,uncomfortablewithhowhestudiedherwithsuchintenseconcern.Sheknewshewasdying—shehadhopeditwasn’tthatobvious.
“Inmylineofwork,it’sbetternotto.”HugheswavedatJameson,indicatingmorelemonade.“Havingawifewouldleavehervulnerable.Ifsomeone,anenemy,wantedtogettome,allthey’dhavetodowould
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betothreatenthewomanIloved.”
“Doyouhavemanyenemies?”sheasked,hereyebrowsraisedinsurprise.
“Ahiredgunalwayshasenemies.It’smyaimtoneverleaveonestanding.”
Leighselleshuddered,pullinghershawltighter.“Concentratingonajobwouldbenearimpossible,Iwouldguess,ifyouhadsomeoneathometoalso
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worryabout.”“Idon’thavea
permanenthome,anyway.Anotherreasontostaysingle.”Hegaveacasualshrugofhisshoulders.
“Therearemanyreasonsmenchoosetoremainsingle.Yourssoundslikeoneofthebetterones.”Asmallcoughtickledthebackofherthroat,lingering,nevereruptingintoafullspasm.Shewaited,expectingitto
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explode,butthemomentpassed,leavingonlythemetallicaftertasteofblood.
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CHAPTERFOURTUESDAY,OCTOBER16,
1860
JournalEntryofBarFlanders:
“Aboystraddlesasaddledifferentlythanagirl”werethepartingwordsAuntWinniecalledtomyback
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whenIrodeoutofHogMountainthismorning.She’sright.
Inmymind’seye,Iseemypapasittingtallinhissaddle,reinsinhislefthandheldloosebetweenhisfingers,alariatgrippedinhisright,hispreferredhandforshooting,too.Hesatasaddlewithaconfident,
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casualattitudegiventomenborntoride.Giventogirlsborntoride,too.
Imustremembertoride,sit,dress,eat,laugh,spit,talk,walk,andthinklikeaboy—allwhileactingnaturally.However,throughtrialanderror,Ihavedetermineditisimpossibletostand
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andpeelikeaboy.Today’s
travelsbroughtmeafewmileseastofFortWorth.Notabadstartatallforawagonhorse.Weputarespectabledentinthethreehundredandfiftymileslefttogo.Ifweaveragefiftymilesaday,thenwecanmakeLittleRock,Arkansasbythistime
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nextweek.FromtheretoSaintJoseph,Missouriisanotherfourhundredseventyfivemiles,buttheOverlandStagecancoveronehundredmilesormoreintwenty-fourhourssinceitmakesquickstopstochangedriversandhorsesandtoallowpassengerscomfort
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breaks.Bymy
calculations,I’llbeapplyingattheCentralOverlandCaliforniaandPikesPeakExpressCompanybytheendofOctober.AsAuntWinniecautioned,I’llrefrainfromreferringtoitastheCOC&PPExpressCompany,whichsent
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herintoanotherfitoflaughter.
IfIpockettwenty-fivedollarsaweekallofNovember,December,andJanuary,I’llhaveatleastthreehundreddollarstofinishpayingthetaxesdueontheranch,plussome.Won’tol’Mr.Goldthwaiteswallow
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histeethwhenheseesthat?
We(meandKing)madecampjustatsunset.Bone-deepwearinesssapsmyappetite.Mydesireforfoodhidesitselfbehindmyribcage.Papausedtosaythat.“What’swronggirl?Yourhungerhidingbehindyourribs?”I’dlaugh,he’dlaugh,
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I’dfeignstarvation.Hiseyeswouldtwinkle—hisgrinwouldspreadacrosshisface.Papa’ssmile,hisearconnectingsmile....
Ilookwestandmythoughtstangle.Iwonderwhat’swrongwithme—wrongwithmyheart.DidIleaveitinPaloPinto?Iwasn’t
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sadthismorningleavingStarling.Ishouldhavebeensad,butIwasn’t.AllIcouldthinkaboutwasgettingonthathorseandriding.Notridingawayfromher,butridingtowardthisopportunity.
ThetownshipofDallasistomorrow’starget,soIshouldclosemy
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journalandsleep.IwonderifI’llhavethatdreamagain,thatrecurringdreamI’vehadthesepastfewnights.Awolf,silentandpowerful,watchesovermeandI’mnotafraid.Hekeepsthenightmaresatbay.
Tomorrow,I’llforgivemyselffornotfeelingsadabout
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leavingmybabysister.I’llputemotionsaside.I’llconcentrateononething:beingBarFlanders.
*****October17,1860
ThetownshipofDallaswasabuzzwithactivityasBarleighrodethroughthemiddleofthesquare,stoppingattheliverystabletorefillhercanteens.Everyone
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waspitchingintorebuildthebusinessdistrict,whichhadbeentorchedthepreviousJuly.Onlyafewbuildingswerecompletelyfunctional.Otherswerehalf-guttedshells,althoughstilloperational.Most,however,werenothingbutcharredheapsofblackenedrubbish.
Seeingthedestruction,smellingthescorchedremainsofwoodandplaster,causedherblood
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tocool.Thememoryofthatnightcamerushingbackwiththesootybreezethatsweptthroughtheburned-outstreets.
BarleighrodeKingpasttheblackenedbuildings,lookingfortheliverystables.AhelpfulstrangerpointedherdownMainStreet,indicatingthebuildingadjacenttoBennett’sMercantile.Barleightippedherhat,said“Muchobliged,”andkept
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riding.Apinch-facedelderly
womanalongwithherhomelydaughterwhowasapproachingoldmaidstatuswereatthestableswaitingforthestagecoach.“Mywidowedsisterliveshere,butwe’regoingbackhometoAustin,”themotherinformedBarleigh.Herbusyhandsfussedattheclosuresonherdress,withherdaughter’sdress,andwiththeribbons
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thatheldherhattoherhead.“Youknowwhodidthat,don’tyou?”
“Ma’am?”Barleighpeeredfromunderthebrimofherhat,followingthewoman’spointedfingertowardtherebuildingproject.“Uh,no,ma’am,Idon’t.”
“Wasn’tlightningdidthat,”shesaid,flippingthehandleofhercarpetbagbackandforth.“Nope.Localslavesrebelledandsetfireto
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thosebuildings.Abolitionistswererunoutoftown,threeNegroeshanged,andajudgeorderedalltherestoftheslavesinthetownshipwhippedforgoodmeasure.Notellingwhoreallydoneit.Buttheyallgotwhipped.”Shetuggedatthefingersofhergloves,thensettledherbrown,pineyesonBarleigh.“Youaren’tanAbolitionist,areyou?”
“I,uh,Ijuststopped
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hereforwaterandtocheckmyhorse’sshoes,ma’am.”Acoldsweatbrokeoutonherbrow.Herhandsshookasshefumbledwithuntyingtheleatherstrapsthatattachedthecanteenstothesaddle.
Themothercontinuedhernosyinquiry,askingwhereBarleighcamefrom,whereshewasgoing,andmightthemotherandherdaughterbefortunateenoughthatherdestinationmight
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alsobeAustin.“Amaleescortwouldbemostwelcome,giventheunrestfulatmosphere.Twohelplesswomentravelingalone....”Shefrettedagainwiththeribbonsonherhat,thefrayedendsbetrayingherlong-standinghabit.
“I’mBarFlanders,ma’am.HeadedtoSaintJoseph,Missouri,tohireonwiththePonyExpress.”Shekeptherwordsandeye
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contacttoaminimum,thoughthemothertriedhardtoengageherinastaringcontest.Thedaughter,however,neverraisedhereyesoffthegroundorhervoiceaboveawhisper.
“Mirabella,wouldn’themakeafineyoungsuitorforyou?”Themotherelbowedherdaughter,eyeswide,andherglovedhandsflutteredintheairliketwoseizuredbirds.“Ithinkhe
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shouldcometoAustininstead.Hecanworkontheranch,ifhewantstoridehorsesforaliving.”
Barleightippedherhat,politelydeclined,madeherexcusetobeonherway,tippedherhatagain,andaw-shuckedherwayoutofthere.
WhileshespurredKingawayatafasttrot,hermindplayedwiththenotionofwhoshe’dhavebecome,ifshe’dgrownupwithafussy
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motherlikethat.Wouldshebeanoldmaid,quiet,shy,andafraidofherownshadowlikeMirabella?Maybefatehaditrightthatsheshouldhavegrownupwithoutamother,withPaparaisingherashedid,inasaddle,onahorse,underthewide-opensky,justasateasewithapistolasshewaswithapencil.
Thefirstcloseencounterasuccess,andshe
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wasnearertobecomingBarFlanders,perfectingherpersona,growingevermorenaturalwithherboy-selfaseachhourpassed.Sinkingintothisnewsomebodyshewasbecoming,shefoundthecloudedimageeasytohidebehind.
Asmallstandoftoweringcottonwoodslinedthebanksofacreekwhereshemadecampforthenight,theirleavespaleyellowwith
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theapproachingautumnchill.Theplaceremindedherofwhereherhorse,Willow,wasstolenbyanIndianboyonthewagontrailnorthwhentheyhadlefttheGulfCoastbehind.Makingasmallfire,shesippedcoffeefromatincup,remembering.
IthadbeenalongtheBrazosRiverbetweenWacoandFortWorthwhenshehadbrokenherpapa’snumberoneruleofthewagontrail,to
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alwaysstaytogether.She’driddenoffalonelikeahotheadedfool.
*****“WhatamIhearingcomingfrominsidethatwagon?”Seamus,Barleigh’sgrandfathershoutedashebroughtuptheteamofhorsestobeharnessedfortheday’sdrive.“Barleigh,whatareyoudoinginthewagon?Birdieissupposedtoberepackingbreakfastsupplies.”
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“She’sthroughwithpacking.I’mreadingtoher.And,I’mteachinghertoread,too,justlikePapataughtme.”Barleighpokedherheadthroughtheflapinthecanvasthatcoveredthewagonandsmiledathergrandfather.
“Slavescan’tread.Theydon’tknowhow.Comeoutofthereatonce,Barleigh.”Hisfacereddenedwithanger.
“Birdiecanread.I
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taughther.Goon,Birdie,showGrandfatherhowwellyoupronouncethewords.”Barleighcrawledoutofthewagonandperchedontheseat,motioningforBirdietofollow.SheheldthebookoutforBirdietotake,butBirdierefused.
“Thatnotbeagoodidea,”saidBirdie,aslightcatchinhervoice.“Yourgrandfatherabusymanthismorning,gettingthehorses
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andwagonready,andall.”“See,”Seamussaid
withasmirk.“EvenBirdieknowsit’safarce.She’smemorizingwhatyou’vereadtoher.She’snotreading.Slavesareincapable.Theirbrainsdon’tfunctionthewayoursdo.”
“Birdiecan,”Barleighinsisted.“Here,readthisnextparagraphthatIhaven’treadtoyou.ShowGrandfatheryou’renotmemorizing.Go
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on.”ShehandedthebooktoBirdie,pointingoutthenextparagraph.
Birdieshookherhead‘no,’clampingherhandsbehindherback,refusingtotakethebook.
Seamuslaughed,hiswordscaustic.“See.Itoldyou.Darkiesareignorant.Youcanshowthematask,butyoucan’tteachthemcomplicatedskills.”
Barleighpressedthe
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issue,insistingthatBirdiedemonstratehercommandofreading,proudofhowshe’dtaughther.“Birdie,showhimhe’swrong.Goon,now.”
Birdiehesitated,andthentookthebookinherhands.Sheread,hervoiceslowandsteady,enunciatingeachword:
“ThisisGod’scurseonslavery!Abitter,bitter,mostaccursedthing!Acursetothe
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masterandacursetotheslave!IwasafooltothinkIcouldmakeanythinggoodoutofsuchadeadlyevil.”Seamusspunonhis
heels,pullingBirdiefromthewagon,slappingherhardacrossherfacewiththebackofhishand,knockingherontotheground.Shelandedinaheapathisfeet.Thebookslippedfromherhandsandlayopeninthedirt,itspages
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flappinglikeatinyflockofwhitebirdstryingtotakeflight.
Hekickedthebookintothedyingembersofthecampfire.“Youarenevertopickupanotherbookagain.Doyouunderstandme?”heshouted,pointinghisfingeratBirdiewholayontheground,anangryweltbeginningtoswellacrosshercheek.
Birdieheldafisttoherbleedinglip,tearswelling
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inhereyes.“Yessuh.Iwon’tnever.”
“Grandfather,don’t!”Barleighshrieked.“Stop!”Sheleaptfromthewagonandattachedherselftohergrandfather’sarmasheliftedBirdieoffthegroundwithonehand,hisotherslappingheracrossthemouth.
“Whatthehell?”Henrycameataruntoseehisfatherwithonehandatwistedfistgrippingthefrontof
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Birdie’sdress,theotherupraised,readytoinflictanotherblowtoheralreadyswollenface.Barleighclungtohisupraisedarm,swinginglikeamonkeyfromabranch.
Henry’svoicegrowledlowwithatremblingfurynottobeignored.Hespokeeachwordasasingleimperative.“Lethergo,Father.Neveragainliftahandtoher.IfIeverseeyouorhearofyoustrikingthis
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woman,it’llbemeyouface.”“Knowyourplace,
boy.Birdieismyslave.It’smyprerogativetopunishherasIseefit.Anyslavecaughtreadingdeservespunishment.”
“That’sadamncoward’sway,amanstrikingawoman.Ifyouwishtohitsomeone,hitme,Father.”Henryspoketheword‘father’withoutatraceofrespect.Heballedhisfists,
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readytoreceiveortolandablow.
“Birdieisnotawoman,she’saslave.Andshe’smyslave,lestyouforget.”Seamusspatoutthewordsasiftheytastedbitterinhismouth.
“She’sahumanbeing.”TheveinsthatformedaVonHenry’sforeheadandthatcrepttheirwaytothesurfacewhenheshowedangerpulsedhotandred.
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“Letthepunishmentfitthecrime.Ifhercrimeisreading,”hesaid,enunciatingeachwordwithacrispindignation,“thentakeawaythebook.”
“Itookthataway,too.Sheisnevertoreadagain.Never.Doyouallthreehearmyvoiceandunderstandmywords?Idemandyourespectmyrules,”shoutedSeamus.“Myslave.Myrules.”
“You’reashamedthat
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Birdiecanread—somethingyouneverlearned.Youpretend,allright,withyourlibraryfullofpreciousbooks.”Henry’shandsfistedandunfistedathissides.
“I’veneverbeenashamedofanything.”Seamusturnedandstompedbacktothewagontofinishhitchingtheteam.
“Ihave,”Henryshoutedathisfather’sback.Hetookaragandwetitwith
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waterfromhiscanteenandbeganwashingthebloodfromBirdie’sface.
“I’msorry,Henry.Ididn’tknowwhatthenextlinebe.Ijustbereadingforhimlikehesayto.I’msorry.”Birdiewhimpered,wincingasHenrydabbedatthebloodoozingfromherswollenlip.
“It’snotyourfault,Birdie.IshouldhaveputastoptoBarleighteachingyou.Iwasafraidsomethinglike
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thiswouldhappenifmyfatherfoundout.”
“No,”Barleighsaid,stompingherfoot.“Youshouldnothaveputanendtothereadinglessons.Youshould’veputanendtoBirdiebeingGrandfather’sslave.Don’tyouunderstand,Papa?”Sherantothecampfireandtriedtoplucktheburningbookoutofthecoals.
Henrygrabbedhis
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daughterbytheshouldersandspunheraround.“Youreadandgetideasaboutthingsyoudon’tunderstand.Whatwereyouthinking,readingUncleTom’sCabintoBirdie?Lettingherreaditaloud?Youshouldhaveknownbetter.”Hekickedattheremainingpagesthatsmolderedandglowedredaroundtheedges.
“Youboughtmethebook,Papa,soI’dhavesomethingnewtoreadonour
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journey.NowyousayIshouldn’tbereadingit.Idon’tunderstand....”Barleightriedtopullaway.
“Lookatme,daughter.Idounderstandyourdesirefortheworldtobefair.Butdarling,you’reonlyfourteenandtooyoungtounderstandtheworld.Thisisacomplicatedissuethathasnoeasysolution.”
“Thesolutioniseasy,Papa.YouandGrandfather
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aremakingithard.”Barleighdidn’twant
tolistentohim.Shejustwantedtoride,torideawayfromhimandhergrandfatherandthethingsshedidn’tunderstand.UntyingWillowfromthewagon,sheswungintothesaddle.
“IcanfindmywaytoFortWorth.Idon’twanttoridealongwithyou.IhatethatGrandfatherwon’tletBirdiebefree,Papa,andI
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hateyoufornotinsistingonit.”
Assoonasthewordslefthermouth,theyhunglikeblackdartsintheair—sharpandhurtful.Shewantedthemback.
“Barleigh,”Henryshouted.“Don’teventhinkaboutridingofffromherebyyourself.It’stoodangeroustoridealone.Barleigh,doyouhearme?”Hekickedthegroundhard,twice,sendinga
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sprayofrocksflying.“Damnit,girl.Whyareyousuchahothead?”Hestood,fistsonhips,glaringathisdaughter.
“It’snotjustslaves,Henry,whoshouldnotbetaughttoread,”Seamusshoutedoverhisshoulder,thehorsesnowhitched,thewagonready.“Impudent,youngteenagegirlsshouldlearnsewingandcookingandleaveeducationtomenlikeuswhoknowwhattodowith
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it.Itwasafoolishthingforyoutoteachthatgirltoread.Youshould’veknownbetter.”
“There’relotsofthingsIshould’veknownbetter.Idon’tcountthisasoneofthem.”Henryspoketohisfather,buthiseyeswereonhisdaughter.Hisblueeyeswerenotshiningandlively,buthurtanddark.
Barleighturnedaway,reininghermarearound,
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spurringmuchharderthanwhatwasneededtoescapefromthepaininherfather’seyes,fromBirdie’sbruisedandswollenface,fromthemadnessofhergrandfather’swrath.Shewishedshehadn’tspurredWillowsohard,wishedthatshehadn’tthrownthosehatefulwordsatherpapa,butcoulddonothingnowbutrideforFortWorth.
Spurringthehorseintoafastgallop,Barleigh
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smackedthelatigoagainstthemare’shipoverandoverwhenshedidn’thaveto.Willowdugdown,runningfaster,tryingherdamnedesttocomplywithwhatwasbeingaskedofher.Thelittlemareranneartoexhaustion,tryingtopleaseherrider.Theharderthehorsetried,themoreBarleighsobbed.
HowcouldhergrandfatherbesobrutaltowardBirdie?Barleigh
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wonderedifshewaslikehim?Didshehaveitinher,too,whippingandspurringherpoorhorseasshedid?Couldthatevilstreakrunthroughherownbloodandhardenherbones?Thethoughtterrifiedher.
“Easy,there,easynow.”ShestrokedWillow’sneckandslowedhertoawalk,bendingforward,buryingherfaceinthehorse’smane.“I’msorry,
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girl,Ishouldn’thavemadeyourunsohard.”Leaningsidewaysinthesaddle,sheranherhandsdownthehorse’ssides,checkingforblood.Lookingatherunstainedhands,sheheavedasighofrelief.
Agatheringoftreesahalfmileorsooffthetrailtothewestindicatedwater.Cottonwoodtreesedgedthebanksandofferedtheirlongbranchestoshadetheground.
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ShereinedWillowtoastop,unsaddledher,butleftthebridleonwhilekeepingthereinstiedaroundhernecktomakeiteasytocatchher.
“I’msorry,Willow,pleaseforgiveme.I’llneverdothatagain.Ipromise.”Shebreatheddeeplythesmellofthehorse’ssweatyneckandstrokedthestarthatswirledatthetipofherblaze.Willownickered,thendroppedherheadtothegroundandbegan
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tograzeonthesweetspringgrassthatgrewbytheedgeofthewidecreek,itswatercool,clear,andinviting.
Afterfillingthecanteen,Barleighpouredwateronherhead,splashingherface,washingoffthedustystreaksfromhertears.Shelaiddownonthesaddleblanketandwatchedasthehorsenippedthegreengrasscleanattheroot,whileignoringthecattailsandbitter
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weedthatgrewalongthewater’sedge.
Stretchingoutinthewarmsunshine,Barleighshuthereyes,hermindunsettledandconfused.Thebreezewhisperedasitrustledthroughthecottonwoodleaves.Doesthetreeownthedirtarounditsroots,takingfromitwhatitwants,ordoesthedirtownthetree,holdingitagainstitswill?
Hereyelidsgrew
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heavyandshedriftedofftosleep,ponderingaworldoutofbalance—aworldshedidn’tunderstand.
ThesnappingofatwigawokeBarleighfromhernap,andsherolledoverontoherside,proppingherheadinherpalm,yawning.“Willow,webettergetyousaddledandourselvesbackonthetrailbefore...”Herbreathcaughtinastartledgasp.
Atthewater’sedge,a
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youngIndianboycrouchedonallfours,drinkingstraightoutofthepondlikeahorse,oracoyote,oranyotherthirstyanimal.Hisdarkskinglistenedinthesun,hisbrowneyes,dartingbetweenBarleighandWillow,lookedwild.Hewasapredatorsizinguphisprey.Hesprangtohisfeetwithliquidgracefulnessandrantowardthehorse.Grabbingahandfulofthemare’smane,heleapt
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ontoherbackinonefluidbound,digginghisbarehealsintohersides,andwasgone.
“Willow!”Barleighscreamed,runningafterthepair,feettangling,falling,handsout,catching,cactusquillssticking,butitwasnouse.Atrailofsepia-coloreddustroseabovethetrailquiteadistanceawayastheIndianboygallopedthestolenhorsefromview.
Henryandthewagon
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caughtupwithBarleighasshewalked,carryinghersaddle.Hisfearofwhatcouldhavehappenedtohisdaughterturnedhisinitialreliefthatshewasallrightintored-hotanger.Barleighhadbrokenherfather’snumberoneruleandhadriddenoffalone.Sheknewthatshedeservedhisrage,andmore.Shehadletherhorsegetstolen.
Theremainderofthe
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journeytoFortWorth,sherodeinthebackofthewagon,curledupwithherheadrestinginBirdie’slap.ShelostherselftotherhythmicalsoundofPeatyandBoss’slargehoovesstrikingthegroundatafasttrot.Inasoft,hushedvoice,BirdiecroonedlullabiesjustasshehadwhenBarleighwasasmallchild,whiletheswayingofthewagonrockedbackandforth.Thecanvas
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cover,pulledopenandtiedtothesides,showcasedthemilkcowtryingherbesttokeepup,thebellthatBarleighhadtiedaroundherneckclangingwitheachstride.
Stretchingoninasolidflatline,theinfinitehorizonshimmered.Barleighkepthereyesalerttoanysignofsomethingbreakingthatline—alonerideronastolenhorse;agroupofriderslookingfortrouble—butall
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shesawwasdustanddirtandsky.
Asearingwindtwirledaroundthewagon,dustswirlingupwardinatwistingvortex.“Windhotasthedevil’sbreathbeabadomen,”Birdiesaidhalftoherself.Barleigh’sspinetingledwithacreepingchill.Asinglewhitecloudasbillowyandfluffyascottonpassedoverhead,erasingthewagon’sshadow.
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*****TheyarrivedinFortWorthasthelong-reachingorangeandpinkfingersofthesettingsunstretchedouttogreetthem,theskyaninkyblue-blacktotheeast.ItwasJune25,1855,thejourneyhavingtakenthreeweeksandthreedays.
Iffortisashortenedversionofthewordfortress,Barleighthoughttheymustbeinterribletrouble.Littleremainedofanything
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recognizableasfortress-like.Highuponanorth-facingbluffoverlookingtheClearForkoftheTrinityRiverremainedaportionofawallbearinggunturrets,theheavywoodenshuttersthrownopenasaboldinvitationtothenightsky.Ifstarsweretheenemies,acleanandclearshotwouldbecertain.
Mr.SimonGoldthwaite,theattorneyandbankerwhohadcorresponded
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withHenryregardingthepropertyinPaloPinto,greetedthemupontheirarrival.HewasquicktosaythatFortWorthhadbeendisbandedandevacuatedoverayearpriorwhentheArmyceaseditsoperationasafortifiedmilitaryoutpost.Remainingsettlerstookoverthefort,settingupshopsandbusinesses,usingthetimberfromthefortresswallstobuildhomes,aschoolhouse,
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andadditionalbuildingsforcommerce.Oneuniquebusiness,somethinghecalledadepartmentstore,aMr.Leonardbeingtheproprietor,deservedspecialmention.
“Imaginealargestorewithanentiredepartmentofbootsandshoes,anothersectionfullofhardware,anotherofwomen’sfinery,”hesaidwithawinkandanod.“Overhereyouhaveadepartmentformen,over
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there,adepartmentforchildren.Everythingyouneedanddon’tyetknowyouneed,allunderoneroof!”Hewinkedagain,slowanddeliberate.
“AlloftheHostileshavebeenpushedbackfartherwest,”heexplainedasreasonforthefort’sdismantling.“TheArmy,withwisdomandforethought,relocatedallgarrisonstopointsdeeperintoIndian
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Territory.”“NotallIndians,”
Barleighinformedhim,“havevacatedthearea.OneisatthisverymomentwellmountedonafancylittlepalominomarenamedWillow.Shestandsfourteenandahalfhands,hasastarandanarrowblaze,fourwhitesocks,flaxenmaneandtale,withacoatthatisadeepautumnleafgold,justincaseyoufindher.”
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HenrytoldMr.Goldthwaiteaboutthemorning’sencounter,whichhadtranspiredafewmilesnorthofwheretheBrazosRiverflowedthroughthetownofWaco.Mr.GoldthwaitesaidhewouldinformtheTexasRangersoftheincident,butheassuredHenrythatfolksinFortWorthweresafe.
Mr.Goldthwaiteplannedforthenextdayatrip
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toPaloPinto,asmallcommunityhalfaday’sridewest,toshowHenrythenewranch,causingHenrytosmileforthefirsttimesincehavingleftCorpusChristi.
BarleighhopedPaloPintosmelledlikeitsounded—likeahorse.Likeasweatyhorse.
“Theland,eighthundredacresandmoretobehadifyoudesire,”saidMr.Goldthwaite,“liesbetweena
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forkoftheBrazosRiverandtheCoffeeCreek,thecreekgettingitsnamebecauseitturnsdarkreddishbrownwhenastormchurnsandmuddiesthewater.Itfoamsontopbecauseoftheloosesiltfromthecalichebeds,likesomeoneaddedahelpingofcream.Idon’tknowaboutyou,”hewinked,“butIsuredolikecreamwithmycoffee.”
Barleighaskedifshe
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couldnametheirnewhome“TheCoffeeCreekRanch.”Henrygaveacomicalwinkandadramaticnod,sendingBarleighintoafitoflaughter.
*****RidingthroughthetownshipofDallas,Barleighhadspiedapalominohorsetiedatahitchingpost,andshethoughtofWillow.Paleyellowcottonwoodsputtingontheirfallcolorsandyellowhorseswerenostalgicsymbolsthat
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triggeredmelancholymemories.
Shepouredwateronthecampfireandthencovereditwithascoopofdirt.Huddleddeepinherbedroll,shewrappedtheblackandredNavajoblanketaroundhershoulders,wonderingwhatthenextday’sridemightbring.
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CHAPTERFIVESEPTEMBER27,1860
Jamesonappearedwithatrayoffreshglassesrimmedinsugar,apitcheroflemonade,whiskeyontheside,andanassortmentofripefruit.Afterlayingoutclean,pressedlinennapkinsandtidyingthetable,heaskedinaclippedBritishaccent,“Willtherebeanythingelse,sir?”The
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fullnessofhisdarkmustachecoveredhismouthandhungwellbelowhissquarejawline,hisfurrycaterpillareyebrowsarchingupwardtoaccentuatehisinquiry.
“Thankyou,Jameson,that’llbeallfornow,”saidHughes,centeringthetrayonthetable.
LeighsellewatchedasJamesonretreatedintotheshadowsofthehotel,hisimpeccableuniformspotless.
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Theoldcloudofdoubtandguiltcreptintohermind,andshewonderedagainwhatitmightbeliketoownareputableestablishmentlikeahotel,insteadoftherowdysaloon,LaVerne’sTavern,thatborehermiddlename.
Shefoldedandrefoldedthecrispwhitenapkin,movedtheglassoflemonadeaninchthisway,twoinchesthatway,andpickedattheripe,red
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strawberryonherplate.“So,”shesigheddeeply,elicitingarattlingcoughthatshookthetable,“therestofmystorywon’ttellitself,willit?”
“No.”Hughesshookhishead.Hewaited,givinghertimetocollectherthoughts.
Leighselle’sgazedriftedacrossthesceniclandscape,settlingonapointsomewherealongabendintheriver.“Aftertheattack,I
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wantedtodie.IfelthorribleguiltthatsomehowIhadbroughtiton.Butitwasn’tmewhodied.Typhoidfeverwastakingitstollinthepoorerquarters,anditspreadthroughouttheparish,soonclaimingmymother,father,andmostofourservants.”
“GoodGod,Leighselle.Ihadnoidea.Howdidyousurvive,afterwhatyou’dbeenthrough?”
“Ihadnochoice.The
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nextmorning,afteranightofwishingIweredead,Iawoketofindthehouseholdquiet,motherandfatherinbed,andtheyweredeathlysick.IsomehowpulledmyselftogetherandfoundthewherewithaltorideintoVermillionParishtofetchDoctorBronstein.Hecamerightaway,andforthreedayswedidallwecouldformyparents.ThenIgotsickwiththetyphoid,too.”The
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memoryoftyphoid’sdeadlyfevercausedavisibleshudder,andLeighselledottedherforeheadwithherhandkerchief.
Hughesmovedhisplateasideandpouredtwocupsofcoffee,passingonetoLeighselle.“Whatyearwasthis?Youwere—?”
“Fifteen,almostsixteen.ItwasSeptemberof1836.DoctorBronsteincalledit‘themonthofdeath.’I
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rememberwakingup,lookingoutthewindow,withthesensationofbeinginaverybaddream.”
*****Theskyisonfireandthesunhasgoneblack.Lyingbackonthepillow,Leighselledriftedinandoutofdreams.Fierydreams.Dreamsofpanic,terror,andpain.Running.Falling.Drowning.Ahandoverhermouth.Suffocating.Screaming.
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Fadingtonothing.Nothing.BigBettywalkedinto
theroomandsatateatrayatthefootofLeighselle’sbed.“Wakeupnow,MissLeighselle.Timeforafternoontea.Ibrungyoucinnamonscones.Yougonnalikethemscones,um-hm.Idonebutteredthemforyou.”
Leighsellesatup.“WhereamI?”
“You’satDoctorBronstein’shouse.Idonetold
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youthesamethingeverytimeyouask,butthat’sfine.Youbeensickagoodwhile.Youboundtoforgetwhatyoudoneask.”BigBettyfistedherhandsonheramplehips.“ButtodayIseetheol’Leighselleshiningthroughthemeyes.Thankyou,Lawd.”
“IthoughtIheardJacqueswhimpering.Ishesick,too?”AwaveofpanicwashedoverLeighselleas
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shelookedaroundforherdog.
“Hefine.Herighthereonthefloorlickingupcrumbs.”Bettyliftedthelittledogontothebedandheburrowedundertheblanket.“Whatspreadroundhereain’taffectingtheanimals.Onlythepeoples.”BigBettyopenedthewindowontheoppositesideoftheroom.“Butonlysomepeoples.Addy-Frankandherchild,
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Birdie,theyallright,butAddy-Frank’stwinbabies,theytooweakandyoungtofightsomethinglikethis.DoctorBronsteinbeallrighttoo,’causehesayGodprotecthimsohecantreatthosethatbesick.”
“MotherandFather?Wherearethey?Aretheyathome?Aretheyallrightnow?Iremembertheyweresick.Ihelpedtakecareofthem.Iremember...”
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DoctorBronsteinrappedonthebedroomdoor.“Iseeyouareawake,MissLeighselle.MayIenter?”
“Yes,pleasecomein,”shesaid,settingtheemptyteacupaside.
BigBettypouredanothercup.“Drinkmore,baby,ifyoucan.Youneedstrength.Doctor,youwantIshouldwaitoutside?”
“No.No,BigBetty.Ithinkyoushouldstay.”
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“Yes’suh.”“Leighselle,”hesaid,
pullingachairuptothebed,“wemusthaveaseriousdiscussionaboutyourcircumstance.Letmelistentoyourlungsfirst.”
Afterabriefexam,DoctorBronsteinpattedheronthebackandsaid,“Well,child,youareontheroadtorecovery.Notemperature.Eyesandthroatclear.Aslightrattleinyourlungsbut
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muchimprovedevenoveryesterday.You’llbefittotravelwithinthemonthifyoucontinueimproving.”
“Fittotravel?WhereamIgoing?Wherearemyparents?”Shesatupstraighter.Theserioustoneofthedoctor’svoicecausedaninneralarmtobeginchiming.
BigBettysatonthebedandtookLeighselle’shandinhers,Doctor
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Bronsteintakingtheother.Withhisfreehand,hepushedhisglassesbackuponhisnose,thenchangedhismindandtookthemoff,tuckingthemintohiscoatpocket.Beadsofsweatglistenedonhisbaldhead,whichheblottedwithhisshirtsleeve.
“Thisisunpleasant,mychild,butthereisonewaytodealwithtragedy,andthatisstraighton.Thefactisthatyourparentsdidnotrecover
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fromtheirillness.I’mverysorry.Wedidallwecould,butitwasnottobeforthemtogetwell.”
AsobtriedtoforminthebackofLeighselle’sthroat.Atearbrimmedbutthensettledbackintoplace,asiftheeffortwastootaxingforherexhaustedbodythathadspentthelastmonthhoveringclosetodeath.“When?”sheasked,hervoiceawhisper.
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“Amonthago,justbeforeIbroughtyouheretomyhouse.Youweregravelyill,too.Iwasn’tsuremymedicinewouldpullyouthrough.”
“Isee.Andtheslaves?”
“Allgone,exceptforAddy-FrankandhereldestchildBirdie.I’mafraidthattheyareallyouhaveleft.”Thedoctorpattedhisforeheadagain,blottingthe
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perspiration.“AllIhaveleft?What
doyoumean?Ihavetheanimals—thehouse—theproperty.”That’snotlogical,Leighsellethought.Thedoctorwasmakingnosensetoher.
DoctorBronsteinlookedhardintohereyes.“Letmebequickwiththis.It’sbesttobequick.Onhisdeathbed,IpromisedyourfatherthatIwouldlookout
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foryou.Hesentforhisattorneytowitnessmebecomingyourguardian.Doyouunderstand?”
Leighsellenoddedherunderstanding.
“Bothyourfatherandyourmotherlovedyouverymuch.Itwastheirfinalwishthatyoushouldnothavetoworryaboutthefuture,ifyousurvived.TheyaskedthatIselltheranchandputthefundsinatrustforyou.Do
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yourecallyourneighbortothenorth,themanwhoseplantationbordersyourproperty?”
“Yes,Iknowhim.MyfathercalledMisseurBaptisteabraggerandacrookandacruelexcuseforaman.Fathersaidheoncebeatahorsehalftodeathforsuckinginairandrefusingtobesaddled.”
“Yes.Hehasareputationforbeingrough.
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Butheofferedafairpriceforyourproperty,includingthecattleandhorses.”Then,lookingatBigBetty,hesaid,“Pleasebringmeaglassofwater,Betty.”
“Yes’suh.”DoctorBronstein
tappedhispocketasifrememberingwhereheputhisglasses,andthenslidthembackontohisface,nudgingthemintoplace.“MisseurBaptiste’sone
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stipulationwasthatthebuildingsbesetafire.Icouldnotconvincehimthattheairinyourhomewasnottainted,thatthisdiseasedidnotcomefrombadair.But,heinsisted.”
Leighsellelookedoutthewindow.“Theskywasonfirethismorning.Isawitfrommywindow.IthoughtIwasdreaming.Thatwasmy—”
“Yes,thatwasyour
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house.Thecarriagehouseandtheslave’squarters,too.Hesenthismenover.Ihadnochoice.Besidesthemoneyfromtheland,you’veretainedownershipofAddy-FrankandBirdie.”
“Ownership?Idon’tknowthefirstthingabouttakingcareofslaves.I’llsetthemfree.IrecallFathertellMotherthatothersaredoingso.”Hearingclearlyherfather’svoiceinherhead
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speakingtohermotherseemedsurreal.They’regonenow.I’mallalone.
“Insomenorthernstates,yes.Butit’sagainstthelawinLouisianatoemancipateaslave.Youcouldgotojailrightalongwiththeslaveyouweretryingtofree.”Hereachedfortheglassofwater.“Thankyou,Betty.”
“Yes’suh,”noddedBigBettyasshemovedtothe
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sidetableandbeganherpreparationofmedicinaltea.
“Besides,”thedoctorcontinued,“you’llneedAddy-Frankasyourhandmaidtohelpyouwithpersonal,day-to-dayrequirements.I’veenrolledyouinschoolupinShreveport.”
Leighselle’sstomachlurched.“Whatkindofschool?I’veneverbeentoschool.Motherhiredtutors.”
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Acoldsweatbegantoformonherbrow.ShereachedforthecupofteaBigBettyoffered,herhandsunsteadyandweak.
“Iunderstandthisisashock,somuchinformationtotakeinatonce.Butthisisbest.You’llnotbetiedtoaplaceofbadmemories.Theranchwouldbeimpossibleforyoutoundertakeonyourown.You’llbegoingtoschoolattheMedical
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HospitalinShreveport.That’swhereIstudiedtobecomeadoctor.It’soneofthefinestfacilitiestolearnmedicineoutsideofVirginiaMilitaryInstitute,whichdoesn’tallowfemales.Shreveportwillallowfemalestudentsintheirnursingprogram.”Thedoctoremptiedtheglassofwater,refillingit.
“ButIdon’tliketobearoundsickness,”Leighselle
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protested,tryingtokeephervoiceevendespitetheadrenalinepushingithigher.“Thesmellofvomitgagsme.Thesightofbloodmakesmeswoon.Thesoundofpainedwailingterrifiesme.I—Icannot.”
“Don’tbeafraid,child.You’llbefine.It’sallsettled.I’vepaidyourtuitionwiththeproceedsfromthesaleofyourproperty,andyouhaveatidysumremainingin
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atrustfundthatI’vesetupforyouattheNationalBankinNewOrleans.Onceyouareoutofschool,youcanopenaclinicofyourown.Ofcourse,you’llhavetohireadoctortoruntheclinic.But,technically,hewouldworkforyou.Now,isthatnotafineidea?”
Leighsellelaybackonherpillow,staringattheceiling.“MotherandFatherdead.Theranchsold.
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MammyHannah,JohnnyBoy,Esther,alltheothersgone,too.MeinnursingschoolwithAddy-FrankandBirdy?Ineedtimetothinkthisallthrough.”
“Ofcourse,mydear.Whenyouawaketomorrowmorning,Itrustthatyou’llseethatIhavedonemybestforyou.You’llhaveaneducation,moneyinthebank,andyoucanleavethissorrowfulplaceandputyour
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sadnessbehindyou.”DoctorBronsteinstoodup,steadyinghimselfagainstthedoorframe.
“Mysadnesswillcomewithme.It’sstitchedtomelikemyownskin.”
“Intime,thatsadnesswilldiminish.Yourheartwillfindwaystorefillitselfwithotherjoys.Rest,drinkthemedicineBettyprepared,andcontinuegettingstronger.”
“Yes,Doctor.Thank
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you.”Leighsellerolledover,
scoopingJacquesupfromwherehe’dburrowedunderthecovers,placinghimonthepillownexttoher.Lookingoutthewindow,shetriedtoenvisionthisredlandwithoutherparents,withouttheslaveswhohadalwaysbeenapartofherlife,withoutherhome,herhorses,wherenothingremainedbutreddeath.
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Shefeltvacant,hollow,asuntetheredasafree-floatingballoon.TherewasnothingleftforherinVermillionParish.Shemustfindherownway.
AplanbegantopieceitselftogetherinLeighselle’smind.Sheknewshewasnotsuitablefornursing—shedidn’thavewhatitmusttaketobeagoodnurse.Therestoodahighprobabilitythatshemightharmherpatients,
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iffornootherreasonthanfordesertion.Surelytherewerelawsagainstthat.
Jacquesscoochedcloserandwhimpered,thenpokedhisnoseintothepalmofLeighselle’shand,hissignalformoreattention.Asshestrokedhissilky,triangleear,sheconsideredherfuture.Withaquietreckoning,itcameintosoftfocus,likefoggraduallyliftingovertheVermillionRiver,sothatthe
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reddirtbanksandbendsandochershoalsgrewintosomethingdefinable.
“I’llbedamned,Jacques,ifwe’regoingtoShreveport.MymoneyisinabankinNewOrleans.ByGodthen,that’swhereweshallgo.”
*****Hughesstudiedthefrailwomansittingacrossfromhim.“I’mtryingtoimagineyouasafrightenedyet
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determinedteenagegirlembarkingonsuchajourney.Itwouldtakegumptionforanadulttoundertakewhatyouwereconsidering.Youwerejustachild.”
Openingherparasol,sherosetoherfeet.“Iwasagirlwithgumption.Ijustdidn’tfullyrealizeityet.I’mgettingabitstiff,sitting.Let’stakeawalk,shallwe?”
“Ofcourse.AndsoyousetoffforNewOrleans.”
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Astheysteppedawayfromthetable,HugheswavedatJameson,indicatingthey’dbebacksoon.
Itwasn’tpleasant,theleaving,Leighsellerecalled.Therehadbeenotherdeathstocontendwithfirst.“BythetimeIwaswellenoughtoleaveVermillionBay,bothDoctorBronsteinandBigBettyhadsuccumbedtothetyphoid,too.”
Somuchdeathinsuch
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ashortperiodoftimehadleftonlyafewremainingsoulswhowereabletohelpburythedead.“Addie-Franksentforhelpfromtheneighboringplantation,buttheonlyhelpavailablewasaskinny,eight-year-oldboy.ThegravesdugforthedoctorandBigBettywereshallowandinadequate,butitwasthebestwecoulddo.”
Astheyroundedthehotel,Hughesopenedthegate
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tothepatio,usheringLeighselleinside.“Icanimaginehowterrifiedyoumusthavebeen.”
“Terrified,yes,butthestrangepart,”sherecalled,asmilewarmingherfacewiththememory,“wasthatIbegantofeelstrongerandmoreself-assuredthanIhadeverfeltbefore.”
“We’remoldedbyouradversities.”HughesmotionedforJamesonand
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requestedcoffeeservice,noticingthathe’dappearedatthepatio.“Wasthatalongenoughwalk?”
“Yes,perfect.”ShetooktheseatHughespulledoutforher.“Andifyouallow,adversitywillmoldyouintoabetter,moreenlightenedversionofyourself.”ShesippedthecupofblackcoffeeJamesonhadpouredfromthesterlingsilverservice.
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“WhenIleftVermillionParishbehind,allIhadwerethetwolettersofintroductionfromDoctorBronstein,onefortheschoolinShreveport,whichIhadnointentionofusing,andtheotherforthebankerwhoheldmytrustinNewOrleans,whichIhadeveryintentionofusing.”
“HowdidyougettoOrleans?”askedHughes,hiscuriositybendinghim
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forward.“Ihelpedmyselfto
thedoctor’sbuggyandcarthorse.First,Iwentthroughhisdeskandbureau.IwaspennilessuntilIcouldgetmyhandsonmytrust.Iknewthegooddoctorwouldn’tmindmetakingwhateverIcouldfind.Therewasnooneleftaliveforhimtogiveitto.Hehadalmosteighthundreddollarshiddeninthebackofhisshavingtoilet.”
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“Youwereaverybravegirl,”saidHugheswithadmiration.“Yougrewupinahurry.”
“Yes.Intheblinkofaneye,Iwentfrombeingtheveryspoiledonlychildwhoneverwantedforanythingtohavingtwopeopleandtwoanimalswhodependedonme.Ididn’thavetimetobeapuddly,tearymess.IhadtogetustoNewOrleans,despitethefactthatIhadat
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bestonlyavagueideaofwhereNewOrleanswas.”
*****EarlyNovember1836
Addy-Frank’sthin,grayshawlhunglimparoundherbonyshoulders;herdarkbrowneyes,sunkenandvacant,staredoffintothedistance.“Justkeeponaheadingthisbuggysouth,MissLeighselle.IknowIheardfolkssayN’Awleansbe
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south.”Five-year-oldBirdie
laycurledinhermother’slaplikeasleepingkitten,whilehermotherstrokedthechild’ssoft,lightbrowncheekwithherfinger.Addy-FrankhadweptforanhourwhentheyleftVermillionBay.She’dcrieduntilherbodywaslimpandemptyoftearsfromhavingtoleavehertwinbabiesbehindinthereddirtgravethatheldtheother
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Beauclaireslaves.“Thankyou,Addy-
Frank,butwecan’tgoanymoresouththanwe’vealreadygoneorwe’llendupintheGulfandneedingaboatinsteadofabuggy.”Leighselledrewthereinsupshort,slowingthehorse.“Weneedtomakeourwayeast.Weshouldheadeast.I’mcertain.Or,maybeweshouldgonorthfirstalittlewaytofindastageroadorrailroad
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wecanfollow,onethatgoeseast.Whatdoyouthink?”
Leighsellehadtriedtoadoptanairofconfidence—shewantedtofeelcertainaboutwhereshewasgoing,buttheonlythingshefeltassuredaboutwasleavingVermillionParish.Theplacesmelledofdeath.
“WhatIthink?IthinkyouthewhitegirlandItheblackgirlandyouneedtostartactinglikeitandquit
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askingmewhatIthink.Idon’twanttothink.AllIwanttodoisgobacktothetimebeforethatol’typhoidtookmybabiesaway.”Addy-Frankdrewhershawlaroundhershouldersandturnedherchintheotherdirection.
“Oh,”Leighsellesaid,stunned.Shepulledhardonthedrivinglinesandreinedthecarthorsetotheleft,headingeast.
*****
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January1,1840–FourYearsLater
LeighsellecalledtoAddy-Frank,“Wehavetwomore.Pleaseattendtotheirwoundsandseetoitthattheyhaveahotmealandabath.Thesegirlslookworseoffthanthefirstthree.”Leighselle’spulsethrobbedinhertemples—herheadachedasangerpercolatedjustbelowthesurface.“It’sworseevery
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year,thesegirlscominginhereabusedandbeatup,thendumpedonmydoorstep.NewYear’sEveshouldbeoutlawed.”
“Yes’sum,MissLeighselle,butain’tmuchlefttofeedthempoorgirls.We’saboutoutafoodinthepantry,”saidAddy-Frank.SheheadedtothebackoftheSewBeauclaireShoppe,wheregirlsinneedhidoutuntilwoundsmendedor
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memoriesfaded.Shemutteredtoherself,“Lostgirlsshowingupwithasobstoryorasplitlip,themworkinggirlsfromthetavern,ain’tnowonderweain’tgotmuchleft.”
“MissLeighselle,”saidBirdie,“theyagentlemanknockingatthefrontdoor.Hewearingatorntopcoat.Specheneedsitmended.”Birdie,smallforherage,hadsilkyblackcurls
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thathunginlong,thickspiralsdownherback.Herfineexoticfeatureswerepulledintoaseriousfrown.“Whysomeonewantstodobusinessonaholiday?MissLeighselle?Wantmetoshowhimin?”
“No,Birdie,myhandsarefullthismorning.Tellhimwe’reclosedinobservanceoftheNewYear,”saidLeighsellefromthekitchenasshesortedand
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washedapples.“Closed?”shouted
Addy-Frankfromdownthehallway.“MissLeighselle,weain’tneverclosed.Weneedthemoney.Yousaytherentbeduesoonand—”
“Calmyourself,Addy-Frank,it’sallright.”Leighsellesighedwithfrustration.“You’recorrect.Weneedthemoney.Showhimintotheparlor,Birdie.”
Thecustomerstepped
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intothefrontroom,removinghistopcoatandhat,handingthegarmenttoBirdie.“Topthreebuttonsaremissingandlapelistorn.”Heturned,asardonicsmilespreadingacrosshisface,andstaredatLeighselle,whostoodinthekitchendoorway.
Leighselledrewinaquickbreathofsurprise.“You.Whatareyoudoinghere?Youmustleaveatonce.Takeyourcoatandleave.”
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“Isawthesignaboveyourdoor,‘SewBeauclaire.’Icouldn’thelpbutnoticethename.Yourbusiness,Iassume?”SeamusFlandersstrolledintothekitchen,hishardblueeyesscanningtheroom.
Leighsellebackedaway,acoldfearwashingoverher.“Isaidtoleave.”
“IwentbacktoVermillionBay.Everythingwasgone,evenyourhouse.
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Theentireparish,vaporized.”Seamusfoldedhishandsacrosshischest,staringather.“Ihadgonebackforyou,totakeyoutoTexas,tomakeyoumywife.Myranchsettled,ahomebuiltforus,moneyinthebank.Everythingwasready.”
Leighsellecontinuedbackingaway,feelingthecolordrainingfromherface,theheatfromherbody.
“Iwastoldthat
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everyonediedexceptforafewslaves.IguessIwastoldwrong.”Hissmilewascold.
“Yes.Nowallthat’sleftareunwelcomememoriesandghosts.”SheleanedfurtherawayasSeamusinchedcloser,awaveofpanicshootingthroughher.“YoumustleaveorI’llscream.”
“Scream?Thenwhat?Frightentheprettylittlechildthatansweredthedoor?
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Summontoyouraidyourdarkieanddrunkenwhores?I’llbehappytoputthemallintheirplace.”
SeamusreachedforLeighselle’shandbutsheswatteditaway.Shegropedbehindherback,tryingtofeelfortheparingknifeshehadleftlyingonthecounterbesidethebowlofapples.
“Idreamedofthis—ofyoubeingalive,ofmefindingyou.Isawthegraves
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ofyourmotherandfather,butnotonewithyournameonit.Iknewinmyheartyouweren’tdead.”
“Youdon’thaveaheart,”shespatoutthewords,herfearcongealingandhardeningintorighteousanger.
“Itoldyouonthatday,Leighselle,thatyoubelongedtome,thatyou’dalwaysbemine.”Withroughhandsheseizedbothofher
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wristsandpulledhertowardhim.“Rememberthatday?Ithinkaboutitallthetime.”
“I’mnotyours.You—youtooksomethingthatdidn’tbelongtoyou.You’reanevilpersonwhoattackedaninnocentchild.”Thehorriblememorysickenedher.
“ThankGodIcameto’OrleansfortheNewYear.ThankGodthatItoremycoat.ThankGodsomeone
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pointedmeinthedirectionofagoodseamstressshop.”Hegrippedherwriststighter.“ThankGodIfoundyouandyou’restillalive.MaybenowI’vegotenoughreasonstostartbelievinginGod.”
Leighsellestruggledagainsthim,tryingtofreeherwristsfromhisgrip.Turningherheadleftandright,shefoughttoresisthissloppykisses.Whiskeyandcheapcigarsflavoredhisbreath,his
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clotheslookingandsmellingasifhehadsleptinthem.
Shemanagedtopullonehandfreeandreachedbehindfortheknife.Theheavybowlofapplestippedoffontothefloorandclangedlikeabellasithit,theredfruitrollingoutlikeshinychildren’smarblesacrosstheblackandwhitecheckeredtilefloor.TheloudnoisecaughtSeamusoffguardlongenoughforLeighselletoslip
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outofhisgraspandrunpasthim.
“Youallright,MissLeighselle?Iheardanoise.”Addy-Frankwalkedintothekitchenandsawthebowlofapplesstrewnacrossthefloor.“Whathappenedhere?”ShelookedfromSeamustoLeighselle.
Birdiewalkedintothekitchenbehindhermotherandbeganpickingupthespilledfruit.“Iwashthem
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off,MissLeighselle.It’sallright.”
“Iwasclumsyandknockedthemtothefloor,Addy-Frank.”Shekepthervoicecalm.Noneedtoalarmanyone.“Doyouhaveourcustomer’smendingfinished?”
“Almost.Justneedtoputafewmorestitchesin.Bejustaminute.”Thesmallmanwithcopperhairandrussetfrecklesseemedunimposing
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untilshelookedintohiseyes;thensheshivered.Shegavehimahardstarebeforewalkingbacktohersewingroom.
Seamusraisedhiseyebrows,hissilveryblueeyesdarkening.HenoddedtowardBirdie.“Yousureareaprettylittlegirl.What’syourname?”
“Birdie,”shesaid,fidgetingonherfeet,theapplesnowbackinthebowl.
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“My,ifyoudon’tfavorMissBeauclaire.Y’alllookenoughaliketobesisters.”Seamusstudiedthechildamomentlonger.“Howoldareyou?”
“She’snotmysister,she’sAddy-Frank’sdaughter,andshe’snoneofyourbusiness,”saidLeighselle,steppingbetweenhimandBirdie.“Nowtakeyourcoatandleave.”
Addy-Frankwalkedin
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withSeamus’scoatandhandedittohim.“Youallfixedupnow.Thatbefivecents,please.”
Seamusignoredher.“Don’tyouagreethere’sastrongfamilyresemblancetotheBeauclaires?”HeturnedtoAddy-Frank.“YoubelongedtoLeighselle’sfather.Irememberyouasoneoftheirhouseslaves.”
“Enoughwiththequestions,”Leighsellesaid.
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“Leavenow.Neversetfootonmythresholdagainoryou’llbesorry.”
“Saveyourthreats.Butunderstandthis.I’llbeback.”Seamusgrabbedhiscoatashemarchedtowardthedoor.Beforeleaving,hetossedatwenty-dollargoldpieceontothecounter.“Keepthechange.”
Hedisappearedintotheloud,boisterouscrowdthatcloggedthestreetinfront
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ofLeighselle’sshopwheresomerevelersweresinging,somelaughing,andsomelookingforaplacetoduckoutoftheheavyrainthathadbeguntofall.
“Takeyourdamnmoneywithyou!”Leighsellescreamed,scoopingthecoinup,throwingitagainsttheslammingdoor.
“Don’tbeafool,MissLeighselle,”saidAddy-Frank.“Bealongtimebefore
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weearnthisamount,justmendingfolks’clothes.Weneedmedicineansuch.Ourfoodismostlycrumbsanscraps.Rentbedue.Thismoneytakecareaallthat.”
Leighselleglaredather.“Youhavenoideawhatyouaresaying.Thatmoneyisevil.It’sbadmoney.It—”Leighselle’svoicewashighandshrill,thedarkmemorysinkingher,sendinghertotheflooronherknees.“I
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don’twanthismoney.”“Ispecthatyoupaida
horriblepriceforthisgoldcoin,”saidAddy-Frank,droppingtothefloor,takingLeighselleinherarms.“There,now.Yougoaheadancry.Getitallout,butgetitoverwith,”shesaid,rockingLeighselleinherarms,“causewehavemoreimportantthingstodothanthinkaboutthatfoulmanwhowalksinthedevil’sshadow.”
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Leighselleranahandacrossherface,wipingatthetears.“He’snotfinished.He’llbeback,nowthatheknowsI’mstillalive—thatI’mhere.”
“IsmelledhiswickednesswhenBirdiebrungmehiscoattosew.Iknewhebebadnewseven’foreIrememberedhisface.Buthewon’tbebackherebotheringyou.Itookcareathat.”Shecontinuedtorock
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Leighselleinherarms.“Youtookcareof
what,Addy-Frank?Whatdoyoumean?”
“ImeanItookcareathatevilman.Isewedacurseintohispocket.Sewedittight.Firstfivestitchestakeawayhishealth,happiness,love,money,anfamily.SixbethenumberofEvil.Sixthblackstitchmakeitfinal.Satanhisselfgonnastealhisbreathanescorthimtohell.”
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Leighsellewentpale.Achilltickledherspineandcoldbeadsofsweatdottedherbrow.“Addy-Frank,whathaveyoudone?Amanwiththosecursesisamanwithnothingtolivefor—withnothingtolose.”
PullingawayfromAddy-Frank,Leighsellemovedtothewindowandstoodwithherforeheadpressedagainstthecoolglasspanes.Shestaredatthe
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wideningpuddlesontheground,watchingbigdropsofrainplopandsendechoingripplesacrossthesurface.Rainpouredfromthedarkeningsky,makingthefirstdayofJanuaryaluckyday.Rainonthefirstdaymeantshowersofblessingsallmonthlong,butshefearedastormwasuponher.Shivering,shedrewthevelvetcurtainsclosedagainstthedrearyscene.
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*****SixMonthsLater–July4,1840–PortofOrleans
Theportcityswelteredinhighnoon’sheatandhumidity,thestagnantsaltyairhospitabletomosquitoesandmalaria.Cargoshipsthatweren’tmooredtoadockcloggedtheBayofOrleans,waitingtheirturn,ridingtheeasyswellsthatlifted,rocked,andsplashedthe
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vessels’eagersailors.CreoleandNegro
dockworkersbentshouldertosweatyshoulderunloadingimportedgoodswhileotherstoiledatloadingthecargomeantforexport.Allalongthebay,therewasarevolvingpasdedeuxofcratesoftropicalfruitandcoffeecomingin,andcattleandcottongoingout.
Therowdy,fetidpiersandsidewalksaroundthe
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dockswerejammedwithrestaurantchefs,hotelcooks,andhagglinghouseslaveshopingtosnatchabargainonabrokencrateofspoiledfruitorspilledcoffee,whilehawkersbarkedtheirdailyofferingsoffreshGulfCoastredsnapperandbaylobsters.Small,roundbirdsonquickfeetdodgedcats,broomsticks,andbootsastheysnappedupscrapsoffishscalesandbreadcrumbs.
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“MissLeighselle,”saidAddy-Frank,fingeringthecoinsinherpocket.“Idoneboughtallthecoffeewecanstandforamonth.Atagoodprice,too.”
“Look,Addy-Frank.Brahmancattleareatthelivestockdock.Thosearethecattlethatmyfatherraised.”Shepausedatthememory,afaintsmilecrossingherface.“Fatherlovedtheirbeautifulgraycoats,andIremember
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thelittlecalves’sweetfaces,theirlargeeyes,withtheirlong,floppyears.Ohno,lookout!”
Asilvery-hidedbullhadbustedthroughthewarpedplanksoftheholdingpenandwasbarrelingdownthenarrowpassagebetweenseller’sboothscongestedwithshoppersandhawkers.Thetwothousand-poundbeastwithhiscone-shapedhornssplitthecrowdintwo,left
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andright.Frightenedpeoplestomped,pushed,shoved,andshoutedintheirattempttosavethemselvesfromtherampaginganimal.
AsshescreamedoutawarningtoAddy-Frank,thebullstruckLeighselleaglancingblow,sendinghersailingthroughtheair.Landinginaheap,Leighsellelayunconscious,headbloodied,unmoving.
Inaninstantshewas
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scoopedupinthesturdyarmsofatallmanwhosefaceseemedtoreflectthesun.Heyelledatthecrowdtowatchout,thattheanimalwascomingback.Thebullwascausingallsortsofdestruction,tossingpeople,tables,andchairsintotheair,tramplingbooths,knockingdowntents.
“He’sturningandcomingback!Standaside,”themanshoutedinanaccent
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heavywithIrishbrogue.LayingLeighselledownontopofavendor’stable,heturnedandpulledhisrevolverasthehordeofpeoplescatteredinmasspanic.Takingcarefulaim,hefiredonce,droppingtheragingbullmomentsbeforeitcamewithingoringdistancefromwherethered-headedstrangerstoodhisground.
Turningbacktotheunconsciousfigurelayingon
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thetable,hetookheragaininhisarmsandbeganwalkingtowardthetownsquare.“WheremightIfindadoctorforthiswoman?”hecalledouttonooneinparticular.
“Thedoctorbethisway,”saidAddy-Frank.“I’mwithher.HernameLeighselleBeauclaire.Whoeverownthatbullyoujustshotankilledbemightyangrywithyou,nomatterthedestructionhebecausing.”
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Addy-Frankwalkedatafastclip,talkingandmotioningasshemovedthroughthecalmingcrowd.
“Iownhim.I’mnotpleasedthatIhadtokillthepooranimal,butallowinghimtotrampleandgoreacrowdofshoppersdidn’tseemliketheneighborlythingtodo.”
Leighsellestirred,eyesfluttering,moaning.“Whathappened?Whatare
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youdoing?Whoareyou?”“Youaskalotof
questionsforaninjuredwoman,”saidHenryFlanders,hisbrightblueeyesflashingamixtureofamusementandconcern.“Younearcametobetrampledbyabull.I’mcarryingyoutoadoctortoseeaboutyourinjuries.Myname’sHenryandtoday’smyfirstdayinAmerica.Sofar,I’dsayit’sbeenanexciting
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one.Thereyouhaveit,andthereitis.”
*****Leighsellecoughedintoherhandkerchief,pattingawaythedropletsofblood.“ThatwasthemomentIfellinlovewithHenryFlanders.”Shewouldalwayslovehim—wouldtakethatlovetohergrave.
Hughespouredcoffee,sippinghissteamingandblack.“Idon’tmeantosound
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obtuse,buthowinthehelldidyoufallinlovewiththesonofamonster?”
“Ididn’tknowHenrywasSeamus’sson.”Ifshehadlearnedthetruth,wouldithavemadeadifference?She’daskedherselfthatquestionmanytimes.“Ididn’tlearnSeamus’snameuntillater,soIdidn’tconnectthetwoofthem.”
“Isee.WhywasHenryinNewOrleans?”
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“Henrydecidedtoimmigratehere,too,tofollowhisfatherwho’dcometoTexasmanyyearsearlier.HisfatherhadhimgotoEnglandfirsttoselectabulltobringwithhim,sincehisoriginalsource,myfather,hadbeenlongoutofbusiness.”
“Aftertheincidentonthewharf,”askedHughes,refillinghiscup,“whathappened?”
“Forthreemonths,we
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weretogetherwhileHenryarrangedtheshippingandreceivingofareplacementbull.Wewereneverapartasinglemoment.Ibecamepregnant,andwemarriedrightaway.”
HughesleanedforwardandpouredLeighselleanothercupofcoffee.“Andthisisthedaughterthatyouwantmetofind?”
“Yes.”Leighselle
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nodded.“Whathappenedto
Henry?”“Therewasadelayin
thereceivingofthereplacementbull,aproblemwiththepaperwork.HenryreceivedatelegraphfromhisfatherstatingthatHenrywastotraveltoEnglandandgettheproblemstraightenedout.Ibeggedhimnottogo,ortotakemewithhim.Henrywascertainthateverythingwould
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befine,thathewouldreturnbeforeourchildwasborn.”Leighselleshookherheadatthememory,acoughrattlingherfrailbody.
“But?”Hughesasked,gesturingwithhispalmsfaceup.
“Butthingsweren’tfine.”Leighsellelookedacrossthetableatherdearfriendandwonderedwhyshe’dneverspokenofherpastwithHughes—hewasso
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easytotalkto—andthemoreshetalkedaboutit,thelessitseemedsohorrible.Sostaining.“Thingsweren’tfineatall.Seamusmadegoodonhisthreat.Hecameback—justlikehesaidhewould.”
*****EarlyafternoonwassiestatimeinSanAntonio,andLeighsellewasexhausted.HughesescortedhertohisroomonthesecondflooroftheMenger,whereshesettled
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inforanafternoonnap.Then,hehurrieddownstairstomeetwithDoctorSchmidtintheColonialRoom,makingarrangementsforhercare.
HewouldhavejustenoughtimebeforemeetingwithJamesontomakeittothetelegraphoffice.There,hewouldsendwordtohisfederalcontactsinWashingtonthattheycouldexpecthiminSaintJoseph,Missouri,bytheendof
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October.SaintJoseph,thefirst
homestationofthePonyExpress,wasrifewithsuspiciousactivity.ImportantpeopleinWashingtonwereunhappythattheirlettersurgingthethirty-firststatetoremainloyaltotheUnionwerenotbeingdeliveredtotheirequallyimportantrecipientsinCalifornia—recipientswhosedeeppocketswerelinedwithshiny
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goldnuggets.
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CHAPTERSIXOCTOBER20,1860
ThursdaypassedwithoutBarleighcrossingpathswithanothersoul.OnFriday,shemetthreegoingintheoppositedirection.ThreeyoungmenheadingtoDallastojointheTexasMilitia.TheyremindedherofAuntWinnie’ssons,alleagertogotowar.“It’scoming,”they
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shouted,pumpingtheirfistsintheairwithexcitement.“Warisonthehorizon.Turnaroundandjoinus.”
Theyspokeof“war”asifitwereadestination,ahappyendingtoapleasantjourney.Theirexuberancetokillortobekilledrevealedthesweetnaivetéofonewhohasneverbeenexposedtotherealityofdeath,especiallytothekindofgruesomedeaththatwarwouldrevealtotheir
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innocenteyes.Timedoesnotheal.
Theclockcanneverbedialedback.Permanentscarswillremain,Barleighwantedtotellthem.Instead,shetippedherhatandkeptriding.
Afteramonotonousmorning,thedaywaschangedbyapleasanthappenstancewhenherpathcrossedthatofanotherlonerider,agray-haired,gray-beardedgentlemanonan
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elderlyhorsethatwasjustasgrayasitsrider.Theymadequitethestrikingpair.
HeintroducedhimselfasMr.Templetonandsaidthathewasheadedsouthforthewinter.LikeaCanadiangoose,hewasn’tstoppingtillhecametoalarge,warmbodyofwater,specificallytheGulfofMexico.WhenBarleighmentionedthatsheusedtoliveinCorpusChristirightontheGulfcoast,he
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offeredtosharehislunchifshe’dshareherstoriesofCorpus.
Shetriedtoeditherthoughtstoalterherstories,makingthemsuitthatofaboy’shistory.Afewtimessheslippedup.Mr.Templetonwassharp.Shecouldseethesuspiciongrowinginhiseyes—andinhisexpression,theconfusionoffollowingsuchataleasshewasweaving.
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“Iunderstandneedingtobebelievedthatyou’reaboy,whatwithtravelingalone,”hesaid,“butyoursecretissafewithme.Isensethere’smoretoyourstory.Youcantellme,ifyouwish,whythedisguise.”
So,shedid.Shepouredouteverything.Theytalkedforhours.Itwasaneededbreakfromthehardriding,thehiding,andthepretending,andshewas
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preparedtomakeupthetimesomewheredowntheroad.
Beforetheyparted,heofferedthisadvice.“Fromnowon,don’tofferfolksaglimpseintoyourpast,evenifasked,thoughI’mhonoredyoutoldme.Butforothers,tellthemyoudon’thaveapast.Thatway,youwon’truntheriskofrevealingyourself.Keepthetruthhiddeninashroudofsadness.Mostfolksdon’twanttorubupagainst
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sadnessforfearit’scontagious.”
He’sright,shethought,assheguidedKingontothetrail.It’sdifficulttospeakofthepastwithoutgettingemotional.Bettertokeepallofthatburied.SharingstorieswithMr.Templeton,thehurthadbecomerealandrawagain.Shewouldbecomethesad,mysteriousBarFlanderswhoseunspeakablepast
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causedtoomuchpaintosharewithothers.
Andwasn’tthatreallythetruth?
Mr.Templetonhadgivenherapartinggiftofabagofroastedcoffee.Shedecidedtomakeatoasttohimeachmorningandtothinkofhimandtorememberhiskindness.ShefeltcertainthatMr.Templetonwasmorehowgrandfathersweresupposedtobethantheone
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shehadknown.TheTexas-Arkansas
borderwaswhereBarleighpitchedcampforthenight.Feelingmoretiredthanshe’deverbeen;however,herspiritswerehigh.InthisbordertowncalledTexarkana,shelearnedofawell-traveledcattleroutethatheadedduenorthintoFortSmith,Arkansas,whereshecouldpickupthestagecoachintoSaintJoseph,Missouri.
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BynothavingtotraveltoLittleRock,shecouldsavetwodaysorbetterofriding.
Lookingforwardtoagoodnight’srestandtoroastedcoffeeinthemorning,Barleighjottedafewnotesinherjournal.Perhapsherdreamwolfwouldappearinhersleeptonight,shewrote,sketchingthefour-leggedcreatureinthemarginsofherbook.Hiscompanywouldnotbeunwelcome.
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*****Shewantedabath.Oralhygienewaseasilyadaptedtolifeonthetrail,butshewonderedhowmuchlongershecouldgowithsimple,discretespongebathsofcertainbodyparts.Atleastitwasn’thertimeofthemonth,shethought.ThatissuewouldtakesomecleverplanningonhowtocopewithandconcealaftertakingonlifeasaPonyExpressrider.
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Oh,thethingsIdidn’tconsider....
One-thirdofthewaytoFortSmith,shefoundherselfbehindaherdofMexicancattleheadedtomarketinKansas.Shefollowedalongforawhilebeforethedustandthefliesbecameanuisance.Pullingoffthetrail,shetookanafternoonnap,somethingofaguiltypleasure,butanhour’srestgaveherandherhorsean
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extraboostofenergy,sotheytraveledwellintothenight.
Farpastmidnight,judgingfromthemoon’sheavenlypath,andfeelinglonely,shemadecamp.Homesick.ThinkingofAuntWinnieandUncleJackandtheirthreeboys.MissingStarling.PapaandBirdie.Along,monotonousdayinthesaddlelefthermindnumbwithtoomuchtimetodwellonthoseshelovedandthose
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shelongedfor.Removingherbedroll
fromthesaddle,shewasremindedofPapa’sfriend,CharlieGoodnight,whovisitedthesummerbeforeStarlingwasborn.He’dpresentedherpapatheNavahoblanketasagift.TherehadbeenmanyIndianuprisingsthatyear,brutalattacksonsettlers,evenmorebrutalretaliationsatthehandsofwhitemen.Whiteoutlaws
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wereperformingallkindsofunspeakableatrocitiesagainstwhitesettlersandblamingitontheIndians.Ithadbeenabloodysummer.
*****“TheselawlessactsofwhitemenpreyingonsettlersarebeingblamedonIndians.Thewhitedesperadoesresponsiblearemakingsurefolksseeitthatway.Wemustkeepawatchfuleyeonanysuspiciouscharacter,behe
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redorwhite.”CaptainGoodnightwasthoughtfulwhenhespoke,choosinghiswordscarefully.HesurelywouldhavechosenmorecensoredwordshadheknownBarleighhidbehindthedoor,listening.
“WhilemostreservationIndiansareagreeabletolearninghowtofarmthelandwhichtheGovernmenthassetasideforthem,therearethosethat
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refusetorelocatetoreservations.TonkawaIndians,they’dratherkillandeatafarmerthantobecomeone,whiletheCherokeeandComanchewouldbehappymurdering,mutilating,andscalpingthefarmer,alongwiththefarmer’swife,andworse.”
“Indiansaredifferenthere,Charlie,thanthefriendlylocalIndiansweencounteredontheGulf,”
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Papasaid.“TheAtakapaandtheKarankawaateturtles,ducks,geese,anddeer.Itseemsyourplainstribeshavedifferentappetites.”
“Notallofthem,Henry,butsomedo.Justremembertokeepawatchfuleye.Thekidnappings,murdering,thecattlerustling,thehorsethievingareincreasing.Themutilationsarebecomingmoregruesome.Everyonemust
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stayvigilant.Anyway,Henry,Ididn’tstopbyherejusttoscareyou.IwantedtobringBarleighthisNavajoblanketfromthetradingpost.Shementionedtomethelasttimeshesawminehowprettyshefoundit.Theydoweaveanicepattern.”
CaptainGoodnightleftBarleighwithabeautifulblackandredwovenblanketalongwithamindsearedhotwithimagestootroublingto
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sleepthatnight.*****
Afterarestlessnightoffitfuldreams,shespentanotherlonelydayonthetrailwithoutanencounterofthehumankind,thoughshesawplentyofrabbits,squirrels,opossum,anddeer.ThepineywoodsofeastTexasandwesternArkansasaboundedwithwildlife.Theantlersonsomeofthewhite-tailstagswouldhavesetherpapa’strigger
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fingertotwitching.Shecouldpicturehimgrinningfromeartoear.
Hermindwandered,althoughsheremainedvigilantofhersurroundings.Butthetrailwaseasytofollow,withKingstayingontask.Onemoreday’sridewouldplaceherwithinsightofFortSmith,Arkansas.Thoughshe’dmissKingandwouldhateleavinghimattheliverystables,shewaseager
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toboardthestagecoachthatwouldtakeheronthenextlegofherjourneytoSaintJoseph,Missouri,andtoherdestiny.
Makingexcellenttime,shefiguredtheywereaveragingbetterthanfiftymilesadaydespiteafewafternoonnapsandoneverylonglunchalongtheway.Itwasinterestingthatmostpeoplesheencountered,Mr.Templetonbeingthe
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exception,readilyacceptedherasaboyridingalone,noquestionsasked.Hadshetakenthisjourneyaloneasagirl,shewouldn’thavemadeitpastFortWorthwithoutsomeonestoppingoraccostingher.
Stormcloudsrolledin,thesmellofrainthickeningtheair.Lightningstreakedacrosstheeveningskyonthehorizon.Thunderrumbledinthedistance.
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She’dneverbeforesleptoutsideduringathunderstormandwasthankfulforthesmalltentthatAuntWinnieinsistedshebringalong.ThiswasthefirstindicationofbadweathersinceleavingHogMountainandthefirsttimeshe’dfelttheneedtopitchatent.Makingcampinadensepinethicketjustoffthetrail,shehopedthatthetrees’thickumbrellawouldoffermoreprotectionagainstthestorm.
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Writinginherjournalnexttothecampfirewhileeatingadinnerofbeansandcornbread(withalittlerabbitcookedoverthefirethisevening)hadbecometheonethingshelookedforwardtoattheendoftheday’sride.Shewrotequickly,finishingherthoughtsbeforethethunderstormsnuffedoutthelight.
*****Lightningcrackled,the
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blackeningskyburstingwithbruisedshadesofgreenandpurple.Thundercrashedandechoedthroughoutthethickpineywoods.Thereverberationsweredeafening,asifeverydemonthatstalkedtheheavensshoutedcursesinunison,andthroughtheirfistsshookthunderfromthesky.
Kingwhinniedinashrill,high-pitchedalarm,stompingandrearing.
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Barleighracedtountiehimfromthelinepicket,afraidthatlightningwouldstrikethetreesandhim,too.Then,shemadeamaddashbackinsidethetent.Itprovedtobeauselessshelteragainstthemightygale,thepowerfulwindssnatchingupthetentandhurlingitaway.Allshecoulddowashuddleunderthesaddleblanketuntilthesquallpassed.
Thenightwoodswere
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toodarkforhertoseefurtherthanthehandinfrontofherface.Shesatuntilmorning,dozingalittle,wet,shivering,andwaitingforthesuntocomeup.Thefearthatshewouldn’tfindherhorsecausedagloomtodarkenherspirit,agloomasgrayanddampasthesky.
Walkingincirclesforhours,callingKing’sname,whistling,lookingeverywhereforhim,proved
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fruitless—hewasgone.BarleightoldherselfthatthestormnodoubtfrightenedhimsobadlythatheranallthewaytoHogMountainandbacktoAuntWinnie.Shelikedtothinkthat’swhathedid.
Shecouldn’tleavethesaddlebehind.IthadbelongedtoUncleJack.So,offshewent,saddleovershoulder,bedrollandblanketattached,andshefootedit
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intoFortSmith,stumblingintotownasthesunwassettingoverthewideArkansasRiver,itsslowcurrentmurmuringsoothing,welcomingsounds.
Aboardinghousewitharoomforthenightandahotbathwerethetwothingsshewantedmostinlife.Shefoundthem,theroomcostingtwodollars,thebathtencents.Itwasaboomtownandpriceswerehigh.She’dhave
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paidtwicethatnottohavetosleepinthewoodsagain.ThoughtsofIndianshidingintheshadowskeptherunsettledandrestless.Rarewerethenightswhenherdreamswerefreeoffearfulimagesofpaintedfaces,paintedwarhorses,flamingarrows,burningbuildings,andworse.
Thoughphysicallyexhausted,writingaboutherfearsandplacingthemonthe
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pagesofherjournal,sheimaginedthattheywouldstayonthepagesandnottroublehersleep.Shebegantowrite.
*****JournalEntry–It’shardtobelieveitwasamonthago,thenightoftheComancheMoon,thenightsobright,sofullofpromiseandlifeanddeath.
Evenas
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midnightapproached,theskywassobrightthatthestarsrefusedtoshine,theirincandescentlightnomatchforthehuge,silveryorb.Highoverhead,themooncastshadowswherethereshouldhavebeennone,miniatureshadowsasiffromthenoondaysun.
ItookPapa
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anothercupofcoffeeandmyNavajoblankettowarmhimagainstthecoolingnightair.Papawrappeditaroundbothofus,andwesatshouldertoshoulder,waitingforthetinycry,thesignalthatAuntWinniehadsuccessfullydeliveredBirdie’sbaby.Welookedoutoverthe
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pasturedottedwithgrazingBrahmancattle,theirfairhidesshimmeringinthevividlunarlight.
“DoyouknowtheIndiannameforwhatwecalltheharvestmoon?”askedPapa.
Ishookmyheadno.
“Wasutonwi,”hesaid.“They
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callit‘themoonwhencalvesgrowhair.’”
Ourcalvesandfoalshadbegunputtingonearly,thickwintercoats,too.Naturewaspreparingthemforaharshwinter.
Thelustysoundofababy’scrypiercedthenight,startlingPapaandme
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withitssuddenintensity.Weboltedforthedoor,runningintothebedroomtoseeAuntWinniewrappingablanketaroundasquirming,cryingbundle.Thefigureinthebedlaymotionless,thesheetssoakedwithblood.
“Takethebabyandgoonout.IneedtoattendBirdie.
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She’slostalotofblood.Yourbabygirl’sfineandhealthy.Go.”WinniebenttoherworkandPapaandIwentbackouttotheporch,Papacradlinghisnewbabydaughterinhisarms.
Ipulledbacktheblankettoseemynewlittlehalf-sister,wonderingifshe’d
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favorme,orPapa,orBirdie.“Lookatallherthick,darkhair,”Imused.
Papalaughed.“It’sthemoonwhenbabiesgrowhair,too.She’sbeautiful,justlikeherbigsister.Here,youtakeher.I’mgoingtoseeaboutBirdie,evenifWinnietriestorunmeout.”
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Irockedthebaby,lettinghernuzzleagainstmyneck.Papa’swordsgavemeachill.Wasthisbaby,likethecalvesandthefoals,inforaharshwinter?Howcouldthishappentoher,too,Iwondered?Wouldshebecursedlikeme,withalifetimeofguiltthatherbirthcaused
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hermother’sdeath?Please,Iprayedtoanyoneuptherelistening,toanyonebehindthemoonwhencalvesgrowhair,pleasedon’tletthisbabygrowupnotknowinghermother.
*****Wednesday,October24,
1860
Fromthesecondsheawoke,
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Barleighhadcoachedherselfforthismoment.Withconfidence,thinkingandspeakinglikeaman,sheaskedtheclerkbehindthecounteroftheFortSmithMercantileandGeneralStoreforwhatshewanted.“OneticketonthenextstagetoSaintJoseph,Missouri,please.”
Theclerk,whosegirthequaledhisheight,studiedBarleighfromdownhisbent,
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wartednoseforalongmomentbeforeanswering.“Well,son,thisisyourluckyday.Justsohappentohaveoneseatleft.”
“Good.Thankyou,sir.”Shebreathedaquietsighofrelief.
“You’llbetheninthandfinalpassenger.Onepieceofluggageisallowed,butyougottoholditonyourlap.Underfootwillbethemailbags.Youcarrying
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anythingotherthanthatsaddle?”
“No,sir.It’sallIgot.”Shelookedhimintheeye,mantoman,unashamedofhermeagernetworth.ThesaddlehadbelongedtoJackJustin,butAuntWinniehadinsistedshetakeit.Itsvaluewasfarbeyondtheleather,wood,metal,andstitchingthatwentintoitsconstruction.
“That’safinesaddle,
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butit’sstillconsideredapieceofluggage.Onyourlapitgoes,oritdon’tgo.”Heshovedhisfingerintotheairtoaccentuatehispoint.
“Yes,sir,Iunderstand,”Barleighsaid,juttingherchininwhatshehopedwasashowofmasculinedetermination.
“Fine.Listofrulesispostedoveryonderonthewall.Readandcommitthemtomemory.There’llbestops
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fourtimesadayandtwiceatnighttochangeoutthemuleteamsandtoallowcomfortbreaksforthepassengers.Foodatthesecomfortstopsisextra.Expectatleastfourdaystomakethedestination.That’llbefortydollarsforathroughticket.Yes,orno?”
“Athroughticket?”Barleighswallowedhard,shiftingherweightfromfoottofoot.
“Yes,athroughticket.
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Besidesthecomfortstops,thestagestopsalongthewaytopickupmailinRogers,Bentonville,BellaVista,Neosho,Joplin,Carthage,KansasCity,andLiberty.TogoallthewaythroughtoSaintJoeisathroughticket.Fortydollars,yesorno?”
Shehandedoverthemoneywithaslighthesitation.Fiftydollarswasthesumtotalinherpocket,agiftAuntWinnieinsistedon
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andthatBarleighinsistedwouldbepaidbackoncehertaxesweresettledwiththebank.
Thesteely-eyedclerkhandedBarleightheticketalongwithapieceofadvice.“Forsomeofyourjourneyyou’llbetravelingthroughIndianCountry.ThesafetyofyourpersoncannotbevouchsafedbyanyonebutGod.Iffin’itwereme,I’dmakesuremygunswere
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loadedandingoodworkingorder.Readthoserulesnow,boy.Yougotjusttenminutesbeforethestagepullsout.”
“Yes,sir.”Shetippedherhatandturnedtothewall,wheretherulesforproperstagecoachetiquettewereposted.
1.Abstinencefromliquorisrequested,butifyoumustdrink,sharethe
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bottle.Todootherwisemakesyouappearselfishandunneighborly.
2.Ifladiesarepresent,gentlemenareurgedtoforegosmokingcigarsandpipesastheodorofsameisrepugnanttotheGentleSex.ChewingtobaccoispermittedbutspitWITHthewind,not
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againstit.3.Gentlemen
mustrefrainfromtheuseofroughlanguageinthepresenceofladiesandchildren.
4.Buffalorobesareprovidedforyourcomfortduringcoldweather.Hoggingrobeswillnotbetoleratedandtheoffenderwillbe
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madetoridewiththedriver.
5.Don’tsnoreloudlywhilesleepingoruseyourfellowpassenger’sshoulderforapillow;heorshemaynotunderstandandfrictionmayresult.
6.Firearmsmaybekeptonyourpersonforuseinemergencies.Donot
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firethemforpleasureorshootatwildanimalsasthesoundrilesthehorses.
7.Intheeventofrunawayhorses,remaincalm.Leapingfromthecoachinpanicwillleaveyouinjured,atthemercyoftheelements,hostileIndiansandhungrycoyotes.
8.Forbidden
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topicsofdiscussionarestagecoachrobberiesandIndianuprisings.
9.Gentsguiltyofunchivalrousbehaviortowardladypassengerswillbeputoffthestage.It’salongwalkback.Awordtothewiseissufficient.
Aroundbackofthe
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generalstorewastheliveryandblacksmithshop,wheresixreplacementmuleswerebeingbroughtuptwobytwo.Theywerebeinghitchedinpairstotheceleritywagon,thetypethatwaslighterandfasterandthusmoreuncomfortablethanthestoriedConcords,whosereputationwasthatofacradleonwheels.
Thelarge,rawbonedmulesmatchedinsizeand
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color,allofthemblack,andtheyshuffledintotheirplacesinthehitchingline.Thiscoachdidn’tlooklikeacradleonwheels,Barleighthought,butlookedinsteadmorelikeacontraptionsuitableforrattlingteethandjarringbones.
Insidethestagecoachwerethreerowsofpassengerseats,eachrowaccommodatingthreepassengers.Onthebackand
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middlerow,thepassengersfacedforward,butthefrontrowfacedrearward,causingthepassengerstofacethefolksseatedonthemiddlerow.Withnotmuchroombetweenrows,thekneesofpassengersinthefrontandmiddlerowsinterlocked,andthenarrownessofthestagecausedthepassengerssittingontheoutsideoftherowstowanttodangletheiroutsidefootoutthedoortogain
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legroom,puttingitprecariouslyclosetothewagon’swheels.
Afamilyofsixwerestuffedonthefrontandmiddlerows:ataciturnpreacherdressedinblack,hissombergraybride,andtheirfourdour,supplicatingchildren.TheywererelocatingtoJoplintobuildachurchofadenominationBarleighwasn’tfamiliar,thefatherhimselfhavinga
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difficulttimeclarifyingfortherestofthepassengersthisnewchurch’sdoctrine.
Onthebackrow,Barleighsatwedgedbetweenalong-leggedbeanpoleofanArmycaptainwhoseuniformsmelledlikecookedcabbageandwhobraggedthathehad“beendirectedbyPresidentBuchananhimselftotraveltoKansasCityonofficialgovernmentbusiness,”andaslight-built,blond-headed
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youngman.Withpride,heclaimedhewas“goingtoSaintJoetoshowthemotherPonyExpressriderswhatriding’sallabout.”
Barleigh’sheartsanktoherstomach.Thiscouldn’tbegood,shethought.Shelookeddownatthesaddleinherlap,fiddlingwiththelatigostrapstiedaroundthebedroll,pretendingnottohearthequestionthecaptainwasasking,tryingtogaina
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fewminutestocomposearesponse.
“Catgotyourtongue?”Thecaptainnudgedherwithhissharp,bonyelbow.“Weallsaidour‘howdys.’Nowit’syourturn.”
“Howdy.”Breathe.Relax.Don’tseemnervous.
“Thatsoundsmightyunfriendly,don’tyouthink?”thecaptainasked,hiswordsslidingintoaslur.“We
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sharedournamesandourstoriesofwhywe’reonthislittlejourney.Therulesofpolitesocietysaythatonemustreciprocate.DoIneedtoteachyoualessonontherulesofpolitesociety,boy?”ThecaptainstudiedBarleighwithhard,bloodshoteyes.
“Reciprocatingwasn’tonthelistofrules,”saidtheotherPonyExpressrider,leaningacrossBarleightoaddressthecaptaindirectly.
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“Whoareyou?”askedthecaptaininahaughtyvoice.
“Ialreadyintroducedmyself.Iguessyouforgot.I’mStoneyWooten,fromFrogLevel,Arkansas.Irecalltherulesmentioningnotspittingintothewind,andnotcursingorsnoringorhoggingthebuffalorobes.Don’trecallnothingabouthavingtosharenamesandstories—justsharingyourliquorifyou
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broughtany.Iseethatyoubroughtsomebutyouain’tsharing.Youdonealreadybrokearuleyourself,asfarasIcantell.”Stoneyeasedbackintohisseat,givingBarleighafriendlynudgeofhiselbow.
“Areyouhisprotectorandappointedspokesperson?”thedark-haired,mustachedcaptainaskedinanagitatedvoice.Hetookasipfromhiswhiskey
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flask,makingabigshowofre-pocketingit.
“Name’sBarFlanders.I’maPonyExpressrider,too.Orsoonwillbe.”Sheremindedherselftonotactintimidatedorafraid.Bedirect.
“Well,ain’tthatsomething?”Stoneyputouthishand.“Maybeafterwegethiredon,we’llbeonthesamerelay.Wouldn’tthatbesomething?”
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Barleighshookhishand.Full,firmgrip.Onepump.“Pleasedtomeetyou,Stoney.Yep,that’dbesomething.”Sheshiftedherbodypositionadegreetoputthecaptainmoreatherbackasbestshecould,giventhetightquarters.
Thecaptainretreatedintohisflaskuntilthelastdropofalcoholwascoaxedfromthecontainer.Soon,arattlingsnorefilledtheair,
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reverberatinginsidethesmall,closedcoach.ThefamilyofsixwithdrewintotheirprayersandtheirBibles,ahummingdroneofdevotionsblendingwiththewhiskeyedwheezingcomingfromthecaptain.
“I’mfromdownawaysinFrogLevel.LivedinArkansasallmylife.Mypa’ssendingmeofftogetapayingjobsohewon’thaveto.HesaysIshouldhelpwith
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feedingtheothertwelveyoung-unsathome.Whereyoufrom?”
Stoney’sfriendlyblueeyesandreadygrinremindedBarleighofherpapa’s.Shefoughtdownawaveoflongingthatcausedhereyestoburn.“I’mfromTexas.Don’thaveanyfamily.”
“Hell,Igotenoughtogoaround.I’llshare.”
“Imaytakeyouuponthat.”Barleighattempteda
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lightheartedsmile,butitwasthin.
ThefourdaysittooktogettoSaintJosephwerelong,dusty,andmonotonous,thenightscold,cramped,anduncomfortable.Tryingtosleepwhilesittinguprightandholdingyourbaggageinyourlapinducedlittlerestyetlotsofstress.Friendlychitter-chatterdwindledtonearsilence.
NoIndians,though.
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Thankfully,noIndians.Evenso,Barleigh
keptherrevolverinafirmgrip,herhandhiddenundertheMcClellansaddleatalltimes.Thesaddlestraddledherlaptheentirejourney.Thismustbehowahorsefeels,shemused.
AftertheprayingfamilydisembarkedinJoplinandtheArmycaptainstumbledoffinKansasCity,StoneyandBarleighstretched
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out.Assherelaxedforthelastday’srideintoSaintJoe,herthighsfeltlightwithoutthestressofasaddlepressingonherlap.
Stoneypulledbackthecanvasflapthatcoveredthewindowopeningoftheceleritywagon;ithadremainedloweredmostofthefourdaystokeepthefinecalichedustoutofthecoach.Abandanaovermouthandnosewasstillrequiredasthe
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muleskickedupmuchdustontheirgallopintoSaintJoseph.
“Well,ain’tthatsomething,”saidStoneyashepokedhisheadoutthewindow.
Thelowerhalfofhisfacewascleanwhenheretreatedbackintothecoachandremovedtheredbandanacoveringhismouthandnose.Theupperhalfofhisfacewassiftedinasoft,white,
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chalk-likepowderthatmadehiseyelashesandeyebrowslookliketheybelongedtoadustyghost.
“Lookatallthempeople.Iain’tneverseensomanypeopleallatonce,justamblingaroundinnoapparenthurry.”Stoneyshookthedustfromhisbandanaandthenwashedhisfacewithwaterfromhiscanteen.
SaintJosephwason
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thefringeofsettlement.Itwasthefarthestoutpostfortravelandcommerce.Itwaswheretherailroadendeditsjourneytowardwesternexpansion.Itwasahubofactivity,trade,andexchange.Itwasraucouswithcowboysbringinginmassiveherdsofcattletomarket.Itwaswheresettlementbloatedoutwardfromthecitycenter,anditwaswheretheOregonTrailpickedupjustoverthebanks
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oftheMissouriRiverandthenwounditswayacrosshorizontalplains,overraggedmountainsandthroughverdantvalleysbeforereachingCaliforniaandthePacificNorthwest.
AnditwaswhereBarleighFlandershadarendezvouswithdestiny.
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CHAPTERSEVENSEPTEMBER27,1860
ThewaitstaffattheMengerHotelsetadecadenteveningbuffetofsmokedhensandwildgame,savorycheeses,ripefruit,yeastrollsandwhole-grainbreads,chocolatepastries,andavarietyofimportedwinesandsparklingFrenchchampagnes.Thelavishspreadinvitedand
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encouragedgluttony.HughesandLeighsellesatontheshadedpatio,sippingchilledVeuveClicquot.
“Howwasyoursiesta?”Hughesasked,settingthechampagnebottleintoanicebucket,theicealsoaluxuryimport.
“Refreshing,”Leighsellesaid,noticingthatshehadn’tcoughedinquitesometime.Sheattributedittothesiesta.Thenagain,the
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champagnemighthaveplayedaroll,shethought,takinganothersip.
“Doyoufeellikepickingupthestorywhereyouleftoff?”Hughesasked.“Orwouldyouratherjustenjoytheevening?”
“Ifeellikeit,yes,thoughthismaybethemostdifficultparttotell.”LeighsellelookedatHughes,wonderingifhewouldratherjustenjoytheeveninginstead
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oflistening.“Areyousureyouwanttohearmytaleofwoe?”
Hughessqueezedherhandandthenraisedhisglass.“That’swhatfriendsarefor.”
Leighselleraisedherglass,clinkingitagainsthis.“ThankGodfordearoldfriends.”
*****LeighselleclutchedtightlytoHenry’sarmandleanedinto
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hissideastheywalkedtothepier,adarksenseofforebodingdimminghermood.“WhydoyouhavetogotoEngland,Henry?Idon’twantyoutogo.”
“Idon’twanttogoeither,Leighselle,butIhavenochoice.MyfatherwantsaBrahmanbulltoreplacetheoneIshot.Hewantsitfromthesamebreeder,sobackacrossthepondIgo.”Henrywrappedhisarmtighter
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aroundhiswife.“Whycan’thego?”
Leighsellepouted.“Heclaimspoor
health.Besides,I’mtheonewhoshotandkilledtheanimalinthefirstplace,withgoodreasonofcourse.It’smydutytoseetoitsreplacement.FathersaidthatIshootingthebullwasanactoffolly.Ineedtosavefaceandmakeitright.”
“Anactoffolly?
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Nonsense.Itwasanactofbravery.”Shecastasidelongglanceatherhusband,rememberingthedayshefellinlovewithhim,andherheartfilledwithpridelikeitalwaysdidwhensherecalledthatday.“Yousavedmorepeoplefromgettinghurt.”Leighselleclosedhereyesandfoughtoffanotherwaveofnausea.
“Morningsicknessagain,darling?”Henryasked
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astheyreachedtheendofthecrowdedpier.HepulledLeighselleclosetohimastheysteppedawayfromthesidewalk,lettingotherspass.
“Yes,butI’mfine.I’mjustafraidyouwon’tcomeback,orsomethingbadwillhappen.I’mworriedthat—”
“Don’tworry,mylove.I’llbebackbeforethebabyarrives.Ineedtoimpressmyfatherandshow
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himIcanaccomplishthistask.IfIworkhardandprovemyselfworthy,I’llbehandsomelyrewarded.”
“He’safatheryouhaven’tseeninoverfifteenyearsbecausehewalkedoutonyouandyourmother.AllyouhavearehistelegraphsandbankdraftsfromTexas.Howcanyouknowthathe’sreliableortrustworthy?”ThemoreLeighsellethoughtaboutit,themoreanxiousshe
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became.“Whyhasn’thecometoNewOrleanstomeetyouanddiscussthesebusinessdealingsfacetoface?”
“Hisbadhealthkeepshimfromtraveling.Leighselle,wehavetotakethisongoodfaith.He’sfollowedthroughoneverythingsofar.”
“IcouldgotoEnglandwithyou.Wecouldlivethere.Notcomeback.”
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Shefistedhiscoatlapelsinherhandsandplacedherheadagainsthischest.
“IhavenothinginEnglandtoofferawife.There’snothinginIrelandtogobacktosinceMadied.Myfutureishere.It’sinTexas.AtleastworkingformyfatherIhaveanopportunitytoownapartofsomething,tosupportawife.Andababy.”HenrytouchedLeighselle’sstomach,whichhintedata
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small,almostimperceptiblebump.
“Nearthreemonths,”whisperedLeighselle,hereyesbrimmingwithtears.“Doyouwishforagirloraboy?”
“Oh,God,please,adaughterwho’sasbeautifulashermother.Sheshouldhaveyourgreeneyesandauburnhair,yourperfectporcelainskin.Iwon’tstandachance.You’llbothhave
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mewrappedtightaroundyourdaintylittlefingers.”
“Iwouldn’tmindasonwithyourcinnamonhairandfreckles,andyoursilver-blueeyes.Ifhehasyourdimplesandreadysmile,he’llhavemewrappedaroundhistinylittlefinger.”
Thehornontheshipgavethreelongblasts,thesmokestackbelchinggraysteamintotheashenskythatwasalmostthesamehue.The
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smokeblendedintothesinkingcloudsasalightdrizzlebegantomisttheair.
LeighselleclungtoHenry’scoat,thebrimmingtearsnowspillingdownhercheeks.“Iloveyou.Idon’twanttobewithoutyou.”
Henry’ssmilestretchedacrosshisface,reachingfromeartoear.“Youwon’tbe.You’rekeepingapartofmewithyou.”
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HenryencircledLeighselleinhisarmsandkissedherwithalongkissthatlingered.Acouplestrollingheadtoheadandarminarmpassed;theyclearedtheirthroatsandraisedtheirbrowsbutkeptwalking.Sailorsontheshipwhistled.Leighselledidn’tcare.ShepressedintoHenry,invitingthekisstogoonforever.
“Ihateto,mydarling
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girl,butImustgo.”Henrygaveheronelastkiss,thenpulledawayandsprintedtowardtheship.
Standingatthesalty,wetrailingthatseparatedthepierfromthedock,shewatchedHenrytreaduptheswingingrope-and-plankbridgethatconnectedthewalkwaytotheship.Shesawhimonthetopdeck,hatinhand,wavingather.Shesawtheshipbeingtuggedoutto
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seaandfeltlikeitwasherheartbeingpulledalongwithit.Thesteamercutaslowturnawayfromthedock,thenmadeitswaytotheouterharbor.Theripplingwaketrailedbehind,connectingLeighselletoHenryinawideningV,untilatugboatcrossedthewake’spath,severingthetie.
Leighsellewept.Shestoodtransfixedwithhereyesonthehorizon.Herhands
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grippedtherailthatkeptherfromtopplingintothedarkandmurkywater,andshewatcheduntilhisshipwasasmalldotdisappearingintothegray,choppysea.
“Almostthreemonthsalong?”askedafamiliarvoicefrombehindhershoulder.“IguessIshouldcongratulatemydaughter-in-law.”
Leighselledrewinasharpbreathandspunaround,
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achillgrippingherheart.“You.What?Whatdoyoumean,congratulateyourdaughter-in-law?”Alltheheat,alltheblood,alltheairinherbodydrainedinasuddenrushtoherfeet,leavingherlightheadedandswooning.Areckoningwashedoverher—adawningofsomethingdreadful—somethinghersubconscioushadsuspected,yetpretendedwasnothing.
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*****SanAntonio,Texas,September27,1860
Hughesshookhisheadindisbelief.“SoSeamussentHenryoutofthecountryonamissiontopurchaseabull.Towhatend,though?”
“IfSeamuscouldn’thaveme,thennooneelsecould,either.”Thehorrorofthosedaysneverlessened.Thememory,thepain,the
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terrorwasvividandraweachnewday.“AndhewouldtakeawayanychanceofmeeverbeinghappyorhavingapartofHenrywithme.”
“Howdidhedoit?”Hughesaskedasherefilledtheirchampagneflutes.
“Hedruggedmewithlaudanum.Buthisevilnessdidn’tstopwithmeandHenry.HeloadedmealongwithAddy-FrankandBirdieintoawagon,andbefore
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leavingNewOrleans,hemadeafewstopsfirst.IlearnedtheseterribledetailslaterfromAddy-Frank.”
*****SeamusguidedthewagontothecornerofSt.LouisandChartresStreetsandreinedtheteamofhorsestoastopnexttooneofthemanyslavepensthatlinedthebusylane.Insidethesqualidpen,whichnormallyhelduptoonehundredslaves,adozen
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Negrosremained.Thegroupconsistedofadultmenofvaryingages,allwearingnewbutcheapsuits,twowomenwithcalicofrockswithmatchingscarvestiedabouttheirheads,andayoungboyoftwelveorthirteenwhoworenewshoestoobigtostayonhisfeet.Theyallpressedagainstthefarsideofthepentryingtoclaimthemeagershadeofferedbythesideofthehotel’swalls.
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“Ifshestirsorstartstowakeup,”heinstructed,“giveherasipofteafromthiscanteen.Don’tletmecatchyoudrinkingfromit.Doyouunderstandme,girl?”
Birdienoddedherhead.“Yes’suh.”
“Getyourgood-byesoverwithhere,butdoitquietly.Idon’twantprospectivebuyersputoffbyabunchofwailingandcarryingon.”
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“Please,MassahFlanders,pleaseletmegowithmyBirdie.SheallIhave.MyothertwobabiesIdoneburied.IcanhelptakecareofMissLeighselle.Ibeendoingiteversincethedayshewasborn.Birdietooyoungtohelpmuchwithababy.Sheain’tbuttenherself.”Addy-Frank’seyeswereredandbloodshotfromcrying,hershoulderssinkingundertheheavyweightof
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whatmightbecomeofher.“She’soldenoughto
learn.Remember,noagitatingprospectivebuyers.”Seamusturnedandstrolledinsidetheopulentbuilding.Hesoonreturned,asmallmaninawhitesuitintow.
“Ihaveonetobesold,”saidSeamustotheauctioneer’sassistant.“She’schainedtothebackofmywagon.Idon’thavetimetowaituntilshesells.I’mon
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mywayoutoftown.Canyouhandlethisanddeposittheproceedsintomybankaccount?”
“Indeed,sir.That’showmostprefertohandleit.Justsignthisdocumentdetailingname,age,andabilitiesofyourproperty,thenyourbankandthenameontheaccount.”Themangaveacheerfulsmile,offeringSeamusthedocumenttosign.
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“Hell,Idon’tknowherageorabilities.I’dpreferifIjustsignthedocumentandyoufillintheblankshoweveryouwish.Myname’sSeamusHenryFlanders.FirstFederalofNewOrleansismybankintown.”
“Yes,Mr.Flanders.Signhere.”Theassistantpointedtothesignatureline.“She’llfetchabetterpriceifshe’scleanandwearinga
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freshdress.Itdoesn’thavetobeexpensive.Themenneedtobeshavedoffacialhairandthewomentheirhaircoveredwithascarf.Ifyouwanttogetthebestprice,youneedtodemonstrate—”
“Justgetwhatyoucan.”Seamussignedthedocumentandtookhisreceipt.
HereleasedthebindingsandledAddy-Frankintotheholdingpen.Just
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beforethedoorclosed,shebolted,runningtothewagon,clutchingBirdieinatightembrace.“Begood.WatchoutforMissLeighselle.Don’tgiveMistahFlandersreasontobeangrywithyou.Youunderstand,child?That’sthemostimportantthingofall.”HertearsfellonBirdie’sface.
“Iunderstand,Mama.ButIwanttocomewithyou,”sobbedBirdie.“Why
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can’tIcomewithyou?”“Here’sasecretto
takewithyou,Birdie.”Addy-Frankhuggedherdaughteronelasttime,whisperinginherear.“...andneverforgetthat,baby.Alwaysrememberthat.”
“Iwon’tforget,Mama,”Birdiesaid,dodgingSeamus’sswattedslaps.
GrabbingAddy-Frankbythearm,Seamustriedtodragherbacktothepenbut
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firsthadtopryBirdie’shandsfree.“Bequiet,girl,Isaidnocommotion.”Hepulledthemapart,forcingAddy-Frankbacktotheholdingpen,shovingherinside.
“Besttoremovethechildfromthemother’ssightsothewomancancalmdownbeforegoingupontheauctionblock.Ahystericalmotherneverbringsmuchmoney.IsthereanythingelseIcanassistyouwith,Mr.
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Flanders?”askedtheassistantauctioneerashefinishedboltingthelockonthepen.
Withoutanswering,withnobackwardglance,Seamusclimbedupontothedriver’sseatandtookthereinsinhand,snappingthemagainstthehorses’backs.“Moveitonout,”hecommandedasheheadedthewagonupRoyalStreet,thennorthtowardAlexandria.
AsSeamus’swagon
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disappearedfromsight,ashinyblackbuggypassedbytheslaveholdingpen,stoppingjustbeyondthehotel.DoctorFlemingsemerged,medicalbaginhand.Withquickstrides,hemadehiswaytotheentranceoftherotunda.Ashepassedtheholdingpen,hepaused,recognizingthefrightenedwomanonherknees,wailing,herhandsfoldedinprayer.
“Addy-Frank?What
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areyoudoingattheslaveauction?Where’sMissLeighselle?”Hesathisbagonthesidewalkandsteppednexttothefence,lacinghisfingersthroughthewireenclosure.“Comehere.Tellmewhat’shappened.”
Sherushedtothefence,graspingthedoctor’scoatsleeve.Inagushofwordsandtears,sheexplainedthenightmarethathadtranspiredinthepast
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twenty-fourhours.“Please,suh,Ibegyou.Pleasebuyme.Icanworkforyou,beyournurseanseamstress.Please,suh.”Herthinfacewashaunted,hereyespleading.
Thedoctorlookedstricken.“I’mnotaslaveowner.Ididn’tcomehereforthepurposeofbuyingslaves.Icametotreatasickguestatthehotel.AreyousurethatLeighsellehasbeentaken
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awaybyherfather-in-law?”“Yessuh.Anhetook
Birdie,too.HestopatJudge’shouseaforebringingmehere.IheardhimsayJudgemadeitlegalforhimtodowhathedo,forhimtosignforLeighselle.”
“Thatdoesn’tmakesense.Leighselledoesn’tneedaguardianoranexecutor.”
“Leighselleain’therself.Sheactinglikeshe
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outofhermind,orsomething.Ibeworriedsick’bouther.”
Theauctioneer’sassistant,withsharpenedcaneinhand,strodeouttothepen.“Allright,youthere,comealong.Looklivelyandsmart.”HepointedthestickatAddy-Frank.“Dryyourface.Nocryingontheauctionblock.”
“Please,Doctor.Pleasetakemewithyou,”she
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implored.“I’msorry,Addy-
Frank.I’mnotinapositiontobuyaslave.I’mapoorcountrydoctor.Idon’tknowhowI’dmanage.”
Addy-Frankbackedawayfromthefence,herexpressionfervent.“Please,Ibegyou,suh.Please.”Herwordstrailedoffastheassistantproddedherwithhissticktowardtherotunda.
“Onceyouareupfor
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sale,tellthebuyerswhatallyouknowhowtodo.Soundsmart,looksharp.You’llgotoabetterownerthemoreyoucandemonstrateallthewaysinwhichyoucanperform,”instructedtheassistant.
Theroomwasbrightandsmelledoftobaccofromthecigarsofwell-dressedmenwhopacedtheroom,assessingthegoodstobesold.Afaintsmellofbacon
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lingeredontheair,thegreaseusedasabodygloss.Afinesheenontheblackskinwaspreferred;grayish,dullskinmeanttuberculosis,whichcouldkillasale.Theauctioneer’sassistantappliedavarietyoftrickstogetthebidsclimbinguntilheheard“Sold!”
Thecrowdwaslively,thebuyersanxioustosnagabargainattheendofthesellingday.Addy-Frank
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walkedtotheblock,headhigh,herfaceglisteningwithtears.
“Shemaylookfrightened,butthere’swisdominthoseeyes,Icanseethatrightoff,”claimedtheauctioneer.“Tellthesebuyerswhatkindofworkyou’lldoforyournewmaster.Speakup.”
“Ianurse,anananny,anaseamstress.Icancooksome,too.Butmostly
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householdduties.”AndIcansewcursesintomen’spocketsthatcomebackandlandonmyhead.Sheranherhandsintothepocketsofherthindress,feelingforthethreadsofacursesomeonemighthavesecretlysewn.
“Let’sstartthebiddingoffatonethousanddollars.Anurse,nanny,seamstress,andcook,allrolledintoone.DoIhearathousand?Onethousand
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dollars.Allright,howaboutsevenhundred.Sevenhundreddollarsforalifetimeofwisdom.”
“Thepriceforaskinnybagofbonesshouldstartattwohundred,”saidawhinyfemalevoiceinthecrowd.“Shelooksfrailenoughtoblowaway,andthenwhat?Loseyourinvestment,that’swhat.”
“I’llgivetwohundred,”shoutedDoctor
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Flemings,hishandsinawhite-knucklegriponhismedicalbag.Heswallowedhard,clearinghisthroat.HekepthiseyesontheauctioneerandawayfromlookingatAddy-Frank.
“Ihavetwohundredherewiththegooddoctor.Twotwenty-fiveanyone?Twohundredtwenty-five?”
Someoneacrosstheroomraisedthebid.
“Twohundredfiftyis
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nowtoyou,Doctor.Yes?No?Willyougo?”
DoctorFlemingsnodded.
Backandforththebiddingwent,climbinginincrementsoftwenty-fivedollars.Biddersdroppedoffuntiltworemained.Theechoofthegavelbanginghardonthehickorydaisconcludedthesale.
“Sold,toDoctorFlemings,forthreehundred
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andseventy-fivedollars.Congratulations,Doc,younowownafinepieceofpropertythere.”
DoctorFlemingsassistedAddy-Frankintothefrontseatofhisbuggy,hisvoiceathinattemptatcheerfulness.“Wehavepatientscomingintotheclinicallafternoon.IusedtotellMissLeighsellethatIcoulduseagoodnurse.Iexpectshewouldbepleased
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toknowthatyou’llbeworkingwithme.”
“Yessuh.Thankyou,suh.”Addie-Franklookedstraightahead,pressingthebackofherfistagainsthermouth,holdinginthescreamthatbeggedtobereleased.
“Andifyoudon’tlikenursing,IcanputyoutoworksewinggownsandblanketsfortheWomenandChildren’sHospital.Howwouldyoulikethat?”The
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doctortookupthedrivinglines,turningthecarthorseawayfromtheslavepens.
“Ilikethatfine,suh,”shesaid,tearsstreamingdownherface.Thebackofherfistpressedharderagainsthermouth,thesilentscreampiercingandshatteringherheart.
*****BirdieshookLeighsellebyhershoulders.“Wakeup,MissLeighselle.Thatmanbe
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hereagain.”Shereferredto
SeamusFlandersas“thatman,”andeveryTuesdayhepaidavisittothenunneryinAlexandriawherehehadLeighselleensconcedforthepurportedreasonthatheneededaprivateplacetoallowhisdaughter-in-law,whosufferedfromseverepsychosis,tohaveherbabyinsafetyandseclusion.Seamusmadeagenerousdonationto
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theirorphanage,ensuringtheircooperation.
Leighselle,sittinginherrockingchair,blinkedopenhereyes.“I’mawake.”Indeed,shewaswideawake.Clear-headed.Nolongerinadrug-inducedfog,thankstoBirdie.
Whentheyhadarrivedatthenunnery,BirdiewasallowedtosleeponafloorrugatthefootofLeighselle’sbed.Every
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morningandevening,SisterFranciswouldknockonthedoor.Birdie,answeringtheknock,wouldreceiveateatray,theinstructionsneverchanging.
“Putthesugarcubeintheteacupbeforeyoupourthetea.MakesureMadamedrinksitallbeforeyoubringthetraydowntothekitchen.”
ButonTuesdaymornings,thereweretwo
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sugarcubes.And,onTuesdaymornings,BirdienoticedthatMissLeighsellewouldbehavestrangely.Shewouldstumblehersteps,mumbleherwords.Shewouldfallasleepwhileshewaseating,whileshewasbathing,evenwhileshewassittingonthechamberpot.She’dsaythingsandusewordsthatBirdiedidn’tunderstand.She’dstareoutthewindow,crying,clawingandscratchingather
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skin.Othersisterswould
prayoverher—invocationslastingalldaylong—strangelitaniescombiningoilsandincenseandchantedreadings,raisedvoicescallingonGod’shealingpower,callingonGodtoenterthebodyandguardthesouloftheunbornchild.
ThescenefrightenedBirdie,whowouldlookoninterrifiedsilence.
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OnedaywhenBirdiewasscrubbingthepantry,sheoverheardSisterFrancisspeakingtoMassahSeamusaboutsomethingcalledlaudanumtreatmentsforMissLeighselle.Theconversationsheheardbetweenthetwo—howthedrugaffectedLeighselle,howtoweanababyfromthedrug’saddiction—frightenedhermorethanthesisters’chantedprayerstoanall-powerful
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Godwhocouldcastpeopleintoburningpitsoffire.
Birdiebegancrumblingthesugarcubesintothechamberpot,thenemptieditwiththewaste.AsLeighsellestartedtoshowsignsofclarity,Birdieconfidedinher,tellingherwhatshehadseenandheardandhowshehadbeentakingcareofMissLeighsellebynotputtingthestrange,brownsugarcubesinhertea
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anymore.“Ain’tnobody’sbaby
needtobebornaddictedtoGodandlaudanum,”Birdiehadsaid,afterLeighsellehadexplainedtoherwhatthewordaddictedmeant.
Theymadeaplan.Soasnottodrawsuspicion,Leighsellewouldbehaveasifshewerestillundertheinfluenceofthedruguntilshefeltrecoveredenoughthatthetwocouldescape.They
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wouldhideclothesandfood,andwhenthemomentwasright,theywouldsneakaway.Weak,herlegsunsteady,Leighsellefigureditwouldtakeamonthbeforeputtingherplanintoaction.
Sittinginherrockingchair,shelookedatBirdie,hereyesclearandbright.“AftertheusualmeetingwithSeamus,whenyouremovethecoffeeserviceandtakeittothepantry,leavethepantry
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unlocked.”Leighsellespokewithclarity,hervoicestrong.“Thesmallvaliseyoupackedisstillthere,right?”
“Yes,MissLeighselle,behindthefloursacks.I’llcheckagainwhenIgodowntoemptyyourchamberpot,butthere’snothingtoempty.Wasn’tnothingintheretohidethesugarcubes.Yousureyoudon’tneedtogo?”Birdieasked,hervoicesounding
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anxious.“I’msure.Justpour
somewaterinthereandcoveritwithpaper.It’llbeallright.Wait.Shhhh....”Leighsellepressedherfingeracrossherlips.
Aknock.SisterFrancisopenedthedoor.“I’mreadytoescortyoutoyourmeeting.Youlookwellthismorning.”Shesmiled.
*****“Thankyou,sister,”said
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Seamus,lookingupwhenheheardthementerthereceivingroom.
Leighselleshuffledintotheroom,herbillowy,flowinggownadiscretecover-upforhereight-and-a-half-monthpregnancy.Aswasthecustom,shetookthechairoppositeSeamus,andasalwaysshestaredathimwithhollow,sadeyesandavacantexpression.
Hewassittingina
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seatbyawindowthatoverlookedapondwithafountain,itssprayfanningouthighintotheair.Swansandducksfloatedunderitsmistyumbrellainlanguidcircles.Hewaswatchingoutthewindow,lookingonassomeoftheorphansskimmedthemossandtrimmedthecattailsthatgrewattheedgeofthepond.
“Hardworkbuildscharacter.Bettertheylearnit
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young,”hesaid.“Yes,sir.”Sister
Francisgaveageneroussmileofagreement.“MayIhaveawordwithyououtinthehall,MisterFlanders?”Shemotionedforhimtojoinher,andSeamusfollowed.
LeighsellestaredatthechairvacatedbySeamusandwaited,anxietychurningherstomach.DidSisterFrancisoverhearherandBirdie’sconversation?She
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glancedoutthewindowattheswans,wishingforwingsthatshemightflyaway.
Afterwhatseemedaneternity,theyreenteredtheroom,Seamustakinghisseat,SisterFrancisservingtheircoffeeandsandwiches.Allseemednormal.Theirsmileswerepleasant,theirvoicescheery,theirconversationabouthisdonationtotheorphanagetheapparentreasonfortheprivatetête-à-
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tête.Leighsellebreatheda
sighofrelief,secretlypocketingtwosandwichesasSisterFrancisexcusedherselffromtheroom,allowingherandSeamustheirprivacy.
“Weekafterweek,Leighselle,andwegothroughthissilentface-offalloveragain.”Seamustentedhisfingers,elbowsonhisknees,restinghischinonthepeak.
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Leighsellesippedhercoffeeandatethesandwichonherplate,savingthecookieforBirdie,followingthesameroutineaseveryTuesday.Withhalf-closedeyes,sheletherheadsway,portrayingtheactionsofoneundertheinfluenceoflaudanum.Sheknewthebehaviorwell.
Seamusgloweredather.“SignthesepapersandI’llhaveHenryonthenext
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shiptoAmerica,wherehecanraisehischildinluxuryandcomfort.Hisheartwillbebrokenthathiswifediedinchildbirth,buthe’llgetoverit.Don’tsign,andHenrywillneverseemeorthischildagain.I’llsendhimaletterthatyou’reawhoreunfittobethemotherofmygrandchildandthatI’mraisingitmyself.”
Leighsellestaredatthedocumentandthepen.
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Herfingersbegantoitch.Herscalptingledlikeathousandneedlesprickingthesurface—notenoughtodrawblood,justenoughtoirritate.Ametallictastelingeredinhermouth,afamiliarsensationthatsherememberedfrombefore.Inasuddenreckoning,shedroppedhercoffeecupanditclatteredtothefloor.
“I’mnotawhore.”Leighselle’seyeswantedto
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close,butsheforcedthemtoremainopen,tofocus.Thecoffee…
“IcandescribeforHenryyourbodyintimately,thetriangularscaronyourbacksidelowenoughformetosmellyourwomanhood,thelargemoleonyourrightbreastjustaboveyournipple.Itwascommonknowledgethatyouletwhoressleepinyoursewingshop.Itwouldn’tbehardtoproveyouanunfit
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mother.”“Youknowmybody
becauseyouforcedyourselfonme.”Leighselle’sheadthrobbed,herpulsespeedingthebloodtoofastthroughherveins.
“Youaskedforit,Leighselle.Youseducedme.Youseducedmyson.I’msuretherehavebeenmanyothermen.”Hesatbackandcrossedhislegs,hisvoiceconversational.“Mygood
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friend,JudgeReederinNewOrleans,wouldsweartoanythingIasked.Heowesmemanyfavors.”
“Henrywouldneverbelievethataboutme,”shesaid,hershouldersdroopingafraction,herposturecurvinginward.
“Itwouldbebettertobethoughtdeadthanthoughtawhore.Signthisdocumentgivingmecustodyofthechild.”Heheldoutthepaper
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andpen.“You’llhaveanice,tidysumtogetonwithyourlife.I’llgetonwithmineandputyoubehindmeforever.”
“IfIdon’tsign,youtakemychild.IfIdosign,youtakemychildandletHenryraiseit.Eitherway,Ilose—youwin.”Shepressedherhandsagainstherears,tryingtoquiettheringing.“IfIsign,itappearsI’vesignedawaymychildformoney,likesomecommonwhore.”
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Seamusleanedforward,hiseyesahard,blueslit.“Youweremine,Leighselle.Youwerealwaysmine.ItoldyouIwascomingbackforyou.Butfindingyouwithmyson—knowingyougavetoHenrywhatbelongedtome—nowthegrandchild.”
“Ididn’tknowHenrywasyourson.I—Ineverbelongedtoyou.”Theroomwasstifling.Pricklyheatirritatedherskin,perspiration
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beadedherbrow—theroombegantoclosein.
Seamusstood,lookingdownonher.“IcanallowHenryandthisgrandchildinmylife.Iwillnotallowyouruiningmylife.Removingyou...istheonlyalternative.It’sthecostofmakingyoupayforwhatyou’vedone.”Then,heturnedandstrodetothedoor,openingit.“Bringherin.”
SisterFrancisstepped
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intotheroom,Birdieintow—hereyesstreamingtears,herbarelegscoveredinthestripemarksofawhip.
SeamusstrodebacktowhereLeighsellesat,clutchingthearmsofthechair,steadyingherself.Leaningclosetoherear,hisvoiceharsh,hepointedtothedoor.“Takealookatyourdarkie.Webothknowthetruth.She’swhathappenedwhenyourfatherfucked
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Addie-Frank.Signthepapers,Leighselle.It’llmakelifeeasieronyourlittlehalf-sister,Birdie.”
Leighselle,gulpingquickbreaths,herheadfloatinglight,tookthepeninhand.Shetouchedthesharpgoldtiptothepaper.Thecloven,diamond-shapedendleftaninkmarkthatspreadoutlikeableedingwound.Shestudiedtheblotblossomingonthelinethat
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waitedforhersignature.Whore,thestainseemedtosay—astainedwoman.Nexttotheink’sblemish,shesignedLeighselleLaVerneBeauclaireFlanders.Sheopenedherfingers,allowingthepentorolloutofherhandandfalltothefloor.
SeamuspickedupthepapersandturnedtoSisterFrancis.“She’snearenoughterm.Isn’ttheresomeconcoctionyoucangiveher
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tohurrythissituationalong?”“Idon’tthinkthatwill
benecessary,”saidSisterFrancis,rushingtoLeighselle’sside.
Pushingherselfoutofthechair,Leighsellestood,clutchingherswollenbelly.Apoolofamnioticwaterpuddledontheflooratherfeet.
*****September27,1860
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ArattlingcougheruptedfromdeepwithinthedepthsofLeighselle’score,acoughfullofbloodanddeath.Thesunnolongerwarmhadturnedtepid,theskyadull,chalkywhitewithahintofpalepinktothewest.
“Andthat,mydearoldfriend,ismystory.”Leighsellestoodandstretched,fistingherhandsagainstherlowerback.
Hughesstoodandput
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hishandsonLeighselle’sshoulders.“You’vebeenlivinganightmarethat’slastedalifetime.IwishI’dknown.I’dhavebeenabetterfriend.Godknowsyouneededone.”
“IhadAddy-Frank.Wehadeachother.WhenIreturnedtoNewOrleans,DocFlemingsreleasedherandshecametolivewithmeagain.”
“Let’stakeawalk.”Hughescrookedhisarm
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throughLeighselle’sandguidedherintothelobbyofthehotel.“Whathappenedafterthat?”
“Afterthat?”Leighsellesaid.“Assoonasthebabywasborn,heleftwithmychildandBirdie.Hegavethesistersinstructionstokeepmesedateduntilhereturnedforme,tellingthemhefearedthetravelsosoonwouldnotbegoodforme.Heneverreturned,ofcourse.”
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“Leighselle.Therearenowords—”Hughesswallowed,forcingbackemotion.“Sorry.”Heclearedhisthroat.“So.Whatdidyoudonext?”
“WhatI’vealwaysdone.Ipickedmyselfup,dustedmyselfoff,andwokeupthenextday.Andthenthenext.Andthenthenextafterthat.Myheartwasbroken.I’dlostbothHenryandBarleigh.Whatkeptmesane
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wasthatmydaughterwouldberaisedbyHenry,andBirdiewouldbetheretohelp.”Shehelduponehand,indicatingsheneededamomenttocomposeherself.
Hughesnodded,walkinginsilence,holdingontoherarm.
“Iknewwherethenunskeptthelaudanum.ThereweretimesIconsideredendingmineandmychild’slifebeforeit
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enteredtheworld.IprayedtoGodthatHewouldendit.But,Ididn’t—Icouldn’t.”
“Jesus,Leighselle.”Hughesdrewadeepbreathandlookedupattheceiling,blinking,swallowing.“Ihopethisson-of-a-bitchisstillaliveandIhavethepleasureofmakinghisacquaintance.”
Theywalkedinsilence,makingtheirwayaroundthewell-appointedlobbytowherethegrand
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pianowasshowcased,stoppingtoadmirethetunethemusicianwasplaying.Asacrowdgathered,LeighsellemotionedtoHughesthatshewasreadytogo.
“Sorrytointerrupt,sir,”saidJameson,meetingthepairastheymadetheirwaybacktothepatio.LeaningclosetoHughes’sear,hesaidinaquietvoice,“Yourpackagehasarrived.Iplaceditinyourroom,sir.”
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“Thankyou,Jameson.I’lllookitoverlater.”
“Yes,sir.”Heturnedbutstoppedshort.“ShouldIarrangeforacarriageforyourguest?”
“No.IfIcantalkMissBeauclaireintoit,she’lltakemyroom.I’llfeelmuchbetterwithherstayingheresothatDocSchmidtisimmediatelyavailableifsheneedshim,andyoucanassistheraswell.Leighselle?Is
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thatallrightwithyou?”“Ican’tputyououtof
yourownroom,Hughes,”saidLeighselle.
“Youalreadyhave,mydear.You’resendingmeonamission—anadventure,really.”
Jamesonclearedhisthroatandtappedhisvestpocket.
“Ihaven’tforgotten,Jameson.I’lltakecareofthatbusinessbeforeIleave.”
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“Fine,sir.I’llsendforMissBeauclaire’sthingsfromtheguesthouseandhavethembroughtuptoyourroom.”Andthenhewasgone.
HughesturnedtoLeighselle,concernwrinklinghisbrow.“Areyouallright?Surely,thishasbeendifficulttalkingabout.”
“Itwasmoredifficultnottalkingaboutit.I’mprayingnowthatyoucanfind
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her.ThelastIheardwasthattheFlandersessoldtheirranchinCorpusChristitoaCaptainKing.TheymayhavesettledintheareaofFortWorth.”
“Well,mydear,that’swhatI’mgoodat,findingpeople.You’llhaveyourdaughterbackinnotime,Ipromise.”
“Oh!No,no,no.”Leighselleheldupbothhands,pushingthethought
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away.“Idon’twantyoutobringhertome.Ijustwantyoutofindher.Idon’twishtodisruptandcomplicateherlife.Ijustneedtoknowthatshe’saliveandwellandhappy.Shedoesn’tneedtoknowanythingaboutmeormylife—mypast.”
“What—Idon’tunderstand.”
“Pleasepromiseme,Hughes,thatyou’llkeepmysecret.Please.”
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“Don’tyouthinkyourdaughterwouldlovetoknowthathermotherisaliveandwantstofindher?”Hugheslookedconfused.
“Afteralltheseyears?”Sheshookherhead.“No.Ifshe’shappyinherlife,Iwanthertostaythatway.KnowingthatI’malivewouldsurelyhurtandconfuseher.There’rethingsaboutmeshemightfindoffensive,ornotunderstand.
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No,it’sbestthisway.”Leighsellehopedthat
itwasbest.SheacceptedHughes’spromisetokeephersecret,ignoringthefactthatheinsistedhewouldtrytochangehermind.Hermindwasmadeup.Someeventslosttothepastshouldstayburied.Thoughtryasshemighttonotdwellonit,sheoftendreamedoftouchingherdaughter,ofseeingher,onemoretime.
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“Afterthebabywasborn,whatdidyoudo?”Hughesreseatedthemattheirtable,whereJamesonhadleftabottleofbrandywaitingforthem.
“AssoonasIrecovered,IsimplytoldthemthatIwasleaving.IwantedtogobacktoNewOrleans,whereImightfeelclosetomemoriesofHenry.MypartinggiftfromSeamushadbeenleftinthepriest’scare.
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Asuitcasefullofhushmoney.Fivethousanddollarstokeepmequietandoutofmydaughter’slife.”
Hughessuckedinabreath.“Fivethousand.Seamuswasevilbuthewasn’tstupid.Hemadesureyouwouldn’tcausetrouble.”
“WhattroublewouldIhavecausedtojeopardizemydaughterorBirdie?”Leighselle’svoicewassharp.Shefoundthethought
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profoundlyridiculous.Seamuswasstupid.HecouldhavepaidherapennyandshewouldhavewalkedawayifitmeantensuringnoharmwouldhavecometoeitherBarleighorBirdie.
“None,ofcourse,”saidHughes.“Inhismind,youwouldhave.”
“No...Igotbusy.IopenedLaVerne’sTavern.NomoreSewBeauclaireandworkingforpennies.And,I
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boughtbackAddy-Frank.Docgavehertome,really.Hewouldn’ttouchthemoney,soImadeaheftydonationtohishospital.”
“Addy-Frank,Birdie’smother.”Hughesflickedaspeckofdirtfromunderhisthumbnail,drummedhisfingersonthetable,andshookhishead.“Howinthehelldidthebothofyoucope,havinglostyourdaughterstothesameman?”
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“Weclungtooneanother,supportedoneanother,criedontheother’sshoulderwhenthegriefwouldovercome.Imissher.”Shesippedherbrandy,bothhandscuppingthesnifter.
“Howlongagodidshepass?”
“Lastyear.Sheencouragedthislittleendeavorofmine.IpromisedherI’dtry....”Leighsellepressedanapkintohereyes,
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blottingthetears.Hugheslookedupat
thedarkeningsky.“Mydear,it’sgettinglateandI’mfeelinganxioustogetonwiththisnewmission.Weshouldgetyouinside,too,beforetheeveningchillsetsin.”
“Eveningchill?HereinSanAntonio?Itstillfeelslikeahundreddegreestome.”
Hugheslaughed.“You’reright.Well,we
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shouldgetyouinbeforetheghostsstartmakingtheirrounds.ItoldyouthattheMengerHotelishaunted,didn’tI?”
“Haunted?Ghosts?”“Yes,ghosts,andlots
ofthemfromwhatIunderstand,thoughI’veneverhadthepleasureofanencounter.”
“Whoandhowmany?”askedLeighselle,achillrunningupherspine.A
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smiletickledthecornersofhermouth.“I’vealwayswantedtomeetaghost.”
“Soldierghosts,manyofthem,mostlikelyfromtheBattleoftheAlamo.ThishotelsitsonthegroundsoftheoldSpanishfortoriginallycalledMissionSanAntoniodeValero,consideredsacredgroundnow.Ifyou’relucky,you’llhearthemuffledbootstompingofthespiritsoldiersmarchingaroundduringthe
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darkofthenight,stillonguardduty.”
“Iwelcomethesoundofamanmovingaboutmyroominthedarkofthenight,”saidLeighsellewithawink.“It’sbeentoolong.”
Theevening’sstarsreflectedlikeathousandsparklingfirefliesintheSanAntonioRiver.Ancientcypresstreeslinedthebanks,knobsfromtheirrootspeepingupoutoftheground
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likesnoopinggnomes.AloneweepingwillowstoodsentrynexttotheAlamo’swestwall,sweepingthegroundwithitslong,thinarms.Theairwasrich,pungent,andthickwiththespicysmellsofsouthTexas.Cricketsandcicadassangtheirpraisestothenight.
HughesescortedLeighselleuptohissecondstoryroomoverlookingtheAlamoPlaza.“Ifyouneed
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anything,Jamesonisintheroomjustbelowmine.Thesignalistostomponthefloorbythewindowthreetimes.He’llhearyou.He’saverylightsleeper,oneeyeandoneearalwaysopen.”
“Hughes,Ican’tbegintothankyou.Iknowyou’llfindher.Ijusthopeit’sintime.”
“Yes,metoo.I’llkeepyoupostedonmyprogress.Thetelegraphoffice
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willdelivermessagestoyouhereatthehotel,acourtesytoMengerguests.Aniceperk.”
Astheystrolledthroughthearcheddoubledoors,pastapolishedwoodandbrassentryway,andintothemarble-tiledreceptionarea,theychattedlikeamiableoldfriendswhomightbediscussingthebeautifulartworkonthewallsorthefineEuropeanfurnishingsoftheMenger.
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Withitsfiftyguestroomsfilledtocapacity,therewereplentyofvisitorsdiscussingthesetrivialtopicsandothermatterslessimportantthanstolenchildren,hushmoney,clandestinemissions,anddeath.
“IhaveBarleightakencareof,financiallyspeaking,”saidLeighselle,holdingontoHughes’sarm.“I’vegiventhattopicalotofattentionthroughouttheyears.Besides
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themajorityofthemoneyfromSeamus,ofwhichIspentverylittle,mybusinessisquiteprofitable.Too,therewastherefundfromthenursingschoolinShreveportwhichIneverattended.Thatwasanexpensiveschool!”
“Ah,theShreveportSchoolofMedicine,Iforgotaboutthat,”saidHughes,givingherarmasqueeze.“I’mgladyouchoseNewOrleansinstead.”
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“Ifsomethinghappenstome...”Leighselle’svoiceturnedserious.“...Barleighwillinheritarespectableamountofrealestateandliquidassets.Mywillisonfilewithmyattorney,aMr.BertramLaMontinNewOrleans.Acopyiswithmeinmyvalise.”
“Ifsomethinghappenstoyou?WhatIexpectwillhappenisthatyou’llrest,recoveryourfullhealth,and
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you’llenjoyapasselofgrandkidsoneday,eachonehavinginheritedyourbeautifulgreencateyes.”
Clutchinghislapelsinherweakgrasp,shesaid,“Becareful,Hughes.IwishIcouldtellyouthatthisiswithoutrisk,butIcannot.IfSeamusFlandersisstillalive,therewillbedanger.”
“Idon’tshyfromdanger,”Hughessaid,asharpedgetohiswords.“Ihunt
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downoutlawsforalivingandbringthemtojustice.IthinkIcanhandleSeamusFlandersifwecrosspaths,andIhopetoGodwedo.ButIknowmymission.I’vegivenyoumywordthatyoursecretissafewithme.”
“Thankyou,Hughes.”Leighselleblinkedawaytears.
“I’llrespectyourwishforprivacyuntilIhearotherwisefromyou.
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Remember,stompthefloorthreetimesbythewindowifyouneedJameson.I’moff.Idon’twanttomissthemidnighttrain.”HekissedLeighselleoneachcheek,huggedherinatightembrace,thenturnedanddisappeareddownthestairs.
“Yourpackage,”calledLeighselleafterhim.Sheranoutintothehallwaywithalarge,thickenvelopeinhand.
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Hugheslookedupfromthelowerlanding.“Dropit.”
Shedidandhecaughtthepackagewithonehand,salutingherwiththeother,andthenblewherakiss.
Shesaluted,sendinganairkissback,hergestureawkwardandclumsy,whichmadeherlaugh.Thelaughdissolvedintoarackingcough,thebloodbrightredandmetallicinhermouth.
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Shestumbledtoherroom,closedthedoor,andleanedherbackupagainstit,waitingforthedizzinesstopass,waitingforcoolness.Hervisionbecamefuzzy,theroom’sfurnishingsoutoffocus.Sheleanedforward,movingherhandsthroughtheairforaplacetoliedown,likeablindpersongropingforsomethingfamiliar.
Slowfeetshuffledandscrapedtheirwayacrossthe
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woodenfloortothefour-postercanopiedbed.Sheeasedherselfontothedownyduvetcover,herbreathingshallowandfast.“Pleasefindher.FindmyBarleigh,”whisperedLeighselleasdarknessclosedin.“Butpleasekeepyourword....”
Bootsontheground—stomp,stomp,stomp—ghostsoldiersonpatrol.Sheheardtheechooftheirheavyfootfalls,thenoisemuffledin
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herearslikeathrobbingpulse.Stomp.Stomp.Stomp.Afaintsmileeasedacrosshermouthmomentsbeforeshefellunconscious,atrickleofbloodstainingthewhite,feather-filledpillow.
AComanchemoonlituptheMengerHotelandbatheditwithabrilliantradiance,asifitwerethemiddleoftheday.Guestslingeredonthepatio,enjoyingthedazzling
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splendoroftheremarkablelunardisplay.Privilegedcompanionsdancedinthemoonlightandtoastedtoitsmagicalspell,whilethemoongildedthehourandallbelowwithitsotherworldlylight.
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CHAPTEREIGHTSEPTEMBER27,1860
Hughesgavethecodedknock:twofast,threeslow,twofast.WhenJamesonansweredthedoor,Hughessteppedintotheroom,givinghimalistofinstructionsregardingLeighselle’scare,anoteforthedoctor,andatelegramforJamesontosendtoNewOrleansaheadofhis
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arrival.“Yes,sir.Anything
else?”askedJameson.“I’velookedoverthe
package.I’llstudyitfurtheronthetrain,”saidHughes.“I’llbeinSaintJosephbytheendofnextmonth,butI’veencounteredaminordelay.”Hehopeditwouldbeminor,anyway.Heconsideredhimselfamongthebestwhenitcametotrackingwildanimals.Howdifficultcould
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itbefindinganineteen-year-oldgirl?
HughesgaveJamesonabriefdescriptionofhisimpendingsearchmissiononcehisvisittoLouisianawascomplete.Heexpecteditwouldtakeafewdaystofindthegirl.Then,hewouldsendJamesonatelegraphoncethatwasdoneandhewasonhiswaytoMissouri.
“Verywell,sir,”saidJameson,takingnotes.“One
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otherquestion.ShouldMissBeauclaire’sconditionbecomedire,whatshouldIdobeyondsendingforthedoctor?”
“She’salreadybeyonddire.I’msurethedoctorwilldohisbesttomakehercomfortable.”Whatelsewastheretodo,thoughtHughes,besideshopelikehellshehadthestrengthtohangonuntilhefoundherdaughter?
*****
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TheSanAntoniotoNewOrleanstrainchuggedeast,yetHughes’sthoughtsdriftedwest.Withafewotherpassengersaboardthemidnightfreightrun,thecarwasquietexceptfortheclankingofwheelsonmetalandtheoccasionalwhistlingofthehorn.Heclosedhiseyesandlosthimselfintherhythmicalcadenceoftherails.
Hisplanwasclearin
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hismind.HewoulddepartLouisianalatethenextdaywhileridingafinehorse,headbacktoTexas,beinCorpusbyweek’send,headnorthtoFortWorthifrequired,andthenbeforeyouknowit,havewordtoLeighsellethathe’dlocatedBarleigh.Howdifficultcoulditbe?
Hemadeapillowofhistopcoat,stuffingitbetweenhisshoulderandthe
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window.Restinghisheadagainstthecoolglass,hetriedclearinghismindofhistroubledthoughtsofLeighselle.ItwaseasytopicturehisdearfriendasshewaswhenheleftNewOrleansthosemanyyearsago—stunning,vibrant,sassy,funny,intelligent.Andclever.Thatwomanwasclever.Hedriftedofftosleep,hismemoriesmeltingintovividdreams.
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*****February24,1852
WinterCarnivalseasonwasinfullswingandLaVerne’sTavernwasahotbedofactivity.ItwasFatTuesday,andallaroundtheFrenchQuarter,paradeswouldclogthestreetsandpassinfrontofthetavern,bringingincustomers,revelers,andtroublemakersalike.Thefinalmasqueradeballcelebrated
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MardiGrasandtheendoffrivolitybeforeAshWednesdayusheredinLentandtheHolyHolidays—andalongwithit,theexpectationfordecorum.Butforonelastnight,unbridledpleasuresforallthesenseswereabundant.Exuberantrevelersdidn’thavetolookfartofindthem.
LeighsellewasdrapingthefinalstrandofanEnglishivyandeucalyptusgarlandaroundthelife-sized
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oilpaintingofacharcoal-grayandsilverBrahminbullthattookupmostofthewallabovethemahoganybar.Shehadcommissionedthepaintingwhenshe’dpurchasedthebusiness,addingabrassnameplateonthebottomoftheframe.TheplatewasetchedwiththewordsHenry’sFolly.
“Youneedahandwiththat?”askedHughesashestrolledthroughthe
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swingingdoorsofthesaloon.“You’reearly.Did
yourfathershutdownLévesqueSugarcaneandShippinginhonorofourMardiGrasmasquerade?”
“He’ddropdeadbeforethatwouldhappen.Hopdownoffthatladderandletmehelpyou.You’remakingmenervouswayupthere.”
Leighselleclimbeddown,handingthegarlandto
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Hughes.“Drapethisoverthetopofthepainting,please.”
“Henry’sFolly.I’vealwayswonderediftherewasastorybehindthename.”Hughesclimbedtheladder,finishingthedecorations.
“Yes,alongstory.”Leighselle’sbrightgreeneyesdarkened,hersmilefaded.
“I’msorry.DidIsaysomethingwrong?”Hughesclimbeddownandthenfoldedtheladder,stowingit
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behindthebar.“It’sallright.Iget
askedthatquestionoften.Ishouldbeusedtoitbynow.”Shesmiled,butthesmilesatflat,notreachinghereyes.
Hughesstudiedherfaceandherpetite,gracefulform.Thewayshelooked,thewayshemoved,remindedhimofacat,butasadcatonthevergeoftears.“Allfinished,”hesaidasheputawaytheladder.“Anything
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elseyouneeddonewhileI’mhere?”
“Justafewmoredecorations.”Leighselleplacedcandlesoneachtable.“Thankyouforhelping.I’mgladyoumanagedtosneakawayfromwork.Yourfathergroomingyoutotakeoverthebusinessistakingyouawayfrombeingmyhandymanandsecurityguard.I’msureI’llbeinneedofyourservicestonight.Thecrowdsthelast
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feweveningshavegrownmoreboisterous.”
“It’dbewiserifFathergroomedJohn-Pierretotakeover.EvenMotherseesthathe’sbettersuitedtorunningthebusiness,”saidHughes,handingcandlestoLeighselleforplacement.
“Won’tyourfatherconsiderwhatyourmotherthinksaboutthesituation?”
Hughessnorted.“Listeningtoawoman’s
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pointofview,evenifthatwomanishiswife,ranksjustbelowhimshuttingdownbusinessforaholiday.”
“You’retwins.Whycan’thegroomJohn-Pierreforthebusiness?”
“Thatwouldgoagainsttradition,Godforbid.I’mtheelderbyawhoppingtwominutes.”Hughesadoptedacomical,mockingtonetohisvoice,causingLeighselletolaugh.
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John-Pierrewasmoresuited.Hedidn’tactlikean‘irresponsibleeighteen-year-oldalwayslookingfortrouble,’toquoteFather.Heactedmorelikea‘responsibleyoungmanonthecuspofadulthood.’But,Fatherwouldtryanything,includingguiltandbribery,togethisway—totryandforcehiseldestsonintofittingintothemoldthatshapedallthemenoftheLévesqueSugarcaneand
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Shippingdynasty.“WhatIwantisto
knowifyoubroughtyourmaskfortheballtonight?”askedLeighselle,puttingthefinishingtouchesonthebar’scenterpiece.“Iwantyoutomingle.Idon’twantyoustandingoutasthehiredgun.Thatwouldputadamperonafestivemood.”
Hughesshookhishead.“Irespectfullydisagree.Ithinkhavingvisiblesecurity
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wouldhelpkeepthingsfromgettingoutofcontrol,likeitdidlastyear.”
“Youworrytoomuch,”chidedLeighselle.“Dressup,wearamask,mingle,havefun,butbeonyourguardforanythingthatneedstampeddown.”
“Yes,ma’am.”Hugheshelpedfinishdecoratingthetavernwithcrepepaperandcolorfulstreamersbeforegoingoutto
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watchtheparade.Acomicaltroupeof
menandboys,womenandgirls,onfoot,onhorseback,orridinginwagons,carts,orbuggies,paradedpastLaVerne’s.Grotesque,horrible,diabolicalmasksseemedtobethetheme.Somecostumeswerehumanbodieswithheadsofbeasts,fowl,orfish.Otherswereanimalbodieswithdistortedhumanheadsmadeofpapier–mâché
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paintedwild,graphiccolors.Allsortsofgarishbeastswoundtheirwayupanddownthestreetinrichconfusionandwithmuchfoolishlaughterandsinging.
Somerevelersworedisguisesofmermaidsormonks,somewerebeggarsorrobbers,whileafewoptedforbodypaintthatleftmanyguessingiftheywereclothedunderneath.Thecarnivalspirithaderuptedoverthe
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FrenchQuarter,spewingdecadenceanddebaucheryallaround.
Laterthateveningatthetavernasthemaskedpartycrowdswelledtocapacity,Hughesmovedthroughtheroom,elbowinghiswayaroundthebar.Jostlinghiswayacrossthedancefloor,pushingandshoving,hemadehiswaytowardMonique.Peacockfeathersmaskedhalfherface,
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withtheotherhalfcoveredinblueandgoldglitterpaint.
“Havingagoodtime,Monique?”
“I’mindisguise.You’renotsupposedtorecognizeme.”
“I’drecognizeyourfieryredhairanywhere.Youshouldhavewornapowderedwig,likethatoneoverthere.”
Hepointedtoatall,beautifulwomaninagold
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brocadegowncutlowintheback,showcasingherexquisiteform.Hermaskwasblackfeathersthatformedabeak-likepointoverhernose,givingheradramaticavianappearance.Hercostumekeptoneguessingifshewereawell-dressedravenorKingLouisXV’smistresswithafeatherafflictiononherface.
Moniquelaughed.“It’sMadamPompadourallright,butthekingwillbe
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shockedwhenshedisrobes.Sheisahe.”
“Ahe?Areyousure?But,herbackissofeminine.Ahe?”Hughescockedhisheadforalookfromadifferentangle.
“Positive.That’sLiberty’scousinBoydGuzzleman,infromMobile.”
“Well,I’llbedamned.He’sprettierthanLiberty,butdon’ttellherIsaidthat.”
“Iwon’t,althoughshe
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saysasmuchherself.I’llcatchupwithyoulater.”SheglancedoveratthebarandsawLeighsellepointingamanherway.
“Becarefultonight.Therearepeopleintownwedon’tknow.”HughesstudiedthemanwalkingtowardMonique.
“Yes,bigbrother,Iknowtherules.”Moniquegavehimapeckonthecheekandslippedaway.Dressedas
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acowboy,aredbandanapulledupoverthelowerhalfofhisfaceandwearingsix-shootersathiship,themantookMoniquebythearmandledherupstairs.
Hugheshadneverbeenwithher.MoniqueandLeighsellewerelikesisters,Leighselletheolder,wisersisterandMoniquetheyounger,naïveonewhocausedhimtofeelprotective.Hehadbeenwithafewofthe
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otherwhoreswhoworkedatLaVerne’s,hadlosthisvirginityoneenjoyable,drunkennighttoLiberty,cousinofBoydthecross-dresser,butLeighselleandMoniquewereoff-limits.Theywerefamily.
Aftermidnightwhenthemaskscameoffandthecrowdthinned,Hughesmadehiswaytothebarforawhiskey,theonedrinkheallowedhimselfwhenon
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duty.Hewasallcoffeedup,jittery,andinneedofacalmingspirit.Thesmallsplashofwaterswirledinasensualfusionwiththedarkamberliquor.Hesipped,sighed,enjoyingthewarmingsensationthatmeltedawaythetensionasheswallowedthatfirsttaste.
SpyingLeighsellepresidingoveragameofpoker,hestrolledover,hissoftblackleathermask
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tuckedintothebreastpocketofhiswine-coloredvest.Hiswhitetuxedoshirtwasrolledatthesleeves,exposingmasculinewrists,hiseveningcoatlongagodiscarded.Hewashandsomeandcomfortableinhiscasualelegancedespitehisyouth,turningtheheadsofwomenandmenalike.
Leighsellelookedupandsmiled.“LikeItoldyou,nothingtoworryabout
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tonight.Thankfully,norepeatoflastyear’sBrawlattheBall.”
HewatchedasLeighselledealtthecardswithdeft,quickmovements,placingonefacedown,onefaceup,thenwaitingforhit-mesorstaysorfoldsfromthemenaroundhertable.Dealer’sfacecardwasthequeenofdiamonds.Halftheplayersfolded;theotherhalfwishedtheyhadwhen
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Leighselleflippedovertheaceofspades.
“Let’stakeabreak,gentlemen.I’llbebackinhalfanhour.Spendyourmoneyatthebaroronthedancefloorwithyourfavoritegirl,butsavealittleformeandthequeenofdiamonds.”Standing,shehookedherarmthroughHughes’s.“Freshairwouldbenice.Howaboutawalkoutside?”
Hughesfinishedhis
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whiskey.Ashesettheglassonthetable,hisambereyessweptacrosstheroomonelasttimebeforeescortingLeighselleoutontothesidewalk.Despitethelatehour,itwascrowdedwithcostumedpeopleinhighcarnivalspirits.
“It’sbeenagreatnightforLaVerne’sTavern,”Leighsellesaidwithasmile.“Thebar’sbeendoingabriskbusinessasusual,thecard
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tablesarelively,andthegirlshaveasteadystreamofescortstwirlingthemaroundthefloorandupthestairs.Haveyouhadanyproblems?”
“Everythingseemspeaceableenough.I’vetriedkeepingtrackofthegirlsandtheirescorts.Ihaven’tseenMoniquesinceearlyevening,though.Haveyou?”
“IthinkthelasttimeIsawherwaswhenshe
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accompaniedherfirstclient,themandisguisedasagunslinger.”
AsinkingfeelingcameoverHughes,asenseofdreadchillinghimfromtheinsideout.Herecalledtheman’sredbandanamaskandhowthemanwalkedwiththesix-shooterathishiplikeagunslinger—itwasnotacostume.Fuck.Hespunaround,racingbackintothetavernandupthestairs,
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takingthemtwoatatime.Monique’sdoorwas
locked.Hughescouldhearmuffledvoicesinsidetheroom.Afaintwhimper,asharpword—aslap—stifledmoaning.Poundingthedoorwithhisfist,hedemanded,“Openup.Security.”
“Goaway,I’mbusy,”saidamalevoice,mumbledandslurredwithalcohol.
“Monique?Areyouallright?It’sHughes.Open
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thedoor.”Hepoundedagainwithhisfists,rattlingtheknob.“Goddamnit,Isaidopenthedoor!”heshouted.
Ahushfelloverthecrowddownstairs.Theycollectivelylookedup,strainingtoseewhatwashappeningintheroomattheheadofthestairs.Thetaverngrewquietexceptfortheplayerpiano,whichcontinuedtoplinkout“MollyWillYouBeMyBride,”the
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thinnotesseemingtolevitateandrideontheheavycigarsmokethatfilledthetavern’sspace.
Steppingback,Hughesraisedhislegandkickedhisbootedfootagainstthedoor,splinteringtheframeintopieces.Whathesawrevoltedhim—enragedhim—thegrotesquescenehittinghimlikeasickeninggutpunchthatdisplacesoxygen,leavingonegulping
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forair.“Moveawayfrom
her,”hesaidthroughgrittedteeth,easinghisgunoutofitsholster.
Moniquewastiedtothebed,aragstuffedinhermouth.Herbreastshadbeenslashed,clumpsofherhairchoppedoff,theredcurlslyinginshinytuftsonthefloor.Round,angryburnmarksfromacigarettedottedthelengthofbotharms,butit
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washerfacehecouldn’tbeartolookat.Bloodsmearedtheblueandgoldglitterpaintonhalfherface;theotherunpaintedhalfwherethefeatheredmaskhadbeenremovedwasnowcoveredindarkpurplebruises.Botheyeswereblackenedandswollenshut,hernosestreamingblood,herbottomliprippedhalfoff,exposingseveralmissingteeth.
“Iwouldn’tdrawon
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meifIwereyou,”themansaidwithadrunkenslur,hisbodywobblingwiththeeffortofstanding.“Youain’tgotnoideawhoyou’redealingwith,doyou?”
Hugheseasedintotheroom,fingersteadyonthetrigger.Hiseyesdartedaround,makingaquickassessmentofthesituation.Onthenightstandbythebedstoodanear-emptybottleofwhiskey,arevolverlying
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nexttoit.AnotherpistollayonthebedbetweenMonique’slegs,employed,hewassure,inallkindsofhorrors.Themanheheldsteadyinhissightwasdirtyandsmall,hismeaneyesbloodshotandwatery,hishandstwitchyandemptyandhovering.
“Idon’tgiveadamnwhatyournameis,”saidHughesinadead-calmvoice,notwantingtoalarmthehalf-
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consciousMonique,whomoanedquietlyinbetweengaspingforbreathontheblood-soakedbed.“Raiseyourhands,slowandeasy.Walktowardme.”
“MynamesWhitt.DaltonWhitt.MeandmybrothersMonroe,Raymond,andArthurmakeuptheWhittGang.I’msureyou’veheardaboutus.Mybrothers’llcomelookingformeifIdon’tmakeitbacktocamp.”
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“Isaidgetyourhandsintheair,yousonofabitch.”Hughessteppedfurtherintotheroom,bloodpoundinginhisheadlikeadrum.“Walkniceandeasytowardme.Now.”
DaltonWhittraisedhishands,hisbodyswayingwiththeexertion.Hecastaglanceatthetableandhisgun,thenbackatHughes.“Ibelievethis’llbeyourlastdaytolivewithoutworryor
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regret.Goahead,takemein,butmybrothersareevenmoreunpleasantthanIam.”HelaughedandwipedspittleandMonique’sbloodfromthecornersofhismouth,hisshirtsleevealreadyadarkrustybrown.
LookingbackatMonique,hegesturedoverhisshoulder,“Shehaditcoming.ThebitchlaughedwhenIdroppedmypants.Laughedatme!Canyou
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fuckingbelieveit?”Helungedtowardthetable,handsoutstretched,grabbingforhisgun.
Hughes,withtheheelofhislefthandpoundingtheColt.45’shammerinrapid-firesuccession,emptiedhissix-shooterintotheman,thefirstbullettakingcareofthejob,theotherroundsspentforgoodmeasure.HepulledDaltonWhittbyhisshirtcollaranddraggedhimout
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intothehall,awayfromthebedandMonique.Then,withthebutt-endofhisgun,hebegantopummelthefaceandheadofthelifelessWhitt.
“Stop,Hughes,”Leighsellesaidassheranupthestairs.Shegrabbedhisarm,pullingbackonitwithallherweight.“He’sdead.Youcanstop.”
“He’snotdeadenough.”Hehitthemanonelasttimeacrosstheface,teeth
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andbonescrunching.WithonefinalkicktoWhitt’sside,Hughesfellbackagainstthewall.Hetookdeepgulpsofbreath,blinkedhardagainstthewhite-hotragemeltinghisvision,tryingtofocusonLeighselle’sface,notonthebloodymesslyingunmovingathisfeet.
Ikilledaman.Heturnedaside,handsonhisknees,andvomited.
Leighsellerubbedhis
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backuntiltheheavingstopped.“IshouldhavecomeupwithyoubutSmittysaidtoletyouhandleit.Whathappened?”
“Hewentforhisgun.Ishothim.I...Ikilledhim.”
“Youdidwhatyouhadto.Amandefendinghimselfisnotakiller.Doyouhearme?Thisdoesnotmakeyoulikehim.”
“WhenIsawwhathedidtoMonique,IknewIwas
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goingtokillhim.”HughesstaredatLeighselle,hiswordshangingintheairbetweenthem.“I’mgladhewentforhisgun,thestupid,drunkenfool.Monique’sbadoff.Hetriedtokillher,too.”
“Tried?Yousendforthesheriffandthedoctor—I’lldowhatIcanhere.”SheturnedtoentertheroombutHughesstretchedhisarmacrossthedoorwaytoblockher.
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“It’sbad.Don’tgointhere—don’tlook.Justsendforthedoctor.”Hetriedtopullthedoorclosedbehindhimbutitbouncedagainstthesplinteredframe.
Leighsellegasped.“Oh!Idid.Isaw.”Sheturnedquickly,pressingherfaceintoHughes’svest.
Hughestookherinhisarms,ahandcuppingthebackofherhead,andheheldheragainsthischestwhile
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Leighsellewept.*****
AfterthesheriffandundertakerleftwithDalton’sbody,mostoftherevelersdeparted,too,insearchofalivelierpartytoendtheevening.Hughesfeltedgyandalert.Hewantedthenighttobeover.ThethreeotherWhittbrothers,nodoubt,wouldcomelookingforhim.Fine.Hewouldwaitforthem.
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Heallowedhimselfonemorewhiskey.Then,toLeighselle,“Closedownbusinessforthenight.TakeAddy-Frankandgoupstairstoyourroomsandlockyourdoors.”
Leighsellenodded.“ThedoctorandAddy-FrankareupwithMonique.That’swhereI’mheadednow.”
“I’llcomecheckonyouinabit,butdon’topenthedoorunlessyouknowit’s
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me.You’rearmed?”“Always.”Sheranher
handsdowntheoutsideofherballgown,feelinghergarters.Shekeptsingle-shotpistols,oneeachside,justabovekneehigh.
AshadowmovingcaughtHughes’seye,butbeforehecouldreact,aknifewasthrown,missinghisfacebyinchesasitslicedtheairbetweenwhereheandLeighsellestood.Hughes
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pushedhertothefloor,pullingatableinfrontofthemforcover.
“WegotwordthatsomeoneherekilledourbrotherDalton,”shoutedavoicefromoutsidetheswingingdoors.“We’renotherefornobody’ceptwhodoneit.Youstepforward,andwe’llleaveeveryoneelsealone.Youdon’tstepforward,andweburnthisplacetohell.”
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“Don’tdoit,Hughes.I’msurethesheriff’smomentsaway.”
“He’sprobablytiedupordeadifthesethreegotpasthim.Staydownbehindthistable.Don’tmakeasound.”
Leighsellenodded.Hughesrosefrom
behindtheoverturnedtable.Hishuntingknife,withitsgleamingbladeandcarvedantlerhandle,pressedagainst
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hislowerback.Heknewwithinafractionofaninchwherehishandwouldsettleontheheavyweapon.Heknewhowfasthecouldgettoit,thenhowfasthecouldzipitthroughtheairtomeetitstarget.Perfectingthemovewassomethinghe’dpracticedsincehewasasmallboylearningtohuntwildboarswithOkwara,thehalf-Negro,half-Navahoplantationslavewho’dtaughtHugheshowto
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slicetheaircleanthrough.“I’dratheryoutake
meprisonerthanseethisfineestablishmentgoupinflames.”Hughesstoodwithhisarmshangingcasuallyathissides,handsrelaxed,fingersopenandready.“Well,hereIam,girls.Comeoninandtakeme.”
Withoutaword,theWhittseasedintotheroom,thethreestandingshouldertoshoulder,barringthedoor.
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Bootsshuffledandspursclinkedonthewoodenfloorstrewnwithstreamersandglitter.Dustmotesfloatedintheair,illuminatedinthegoldenglowofthegaslights.Theonlysoundwasheavy,measuredbreathing.
Hugheswaited.Therewardgoestothepatienthunter.Yes,Okwara,Iremember.
Then,withanalmostimperceptiblegesture,aslight
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dipoftheheadfromthebrotherinthemiddle,noddingtotheoneonhisright,thelargestofthethreebrothersmadeaquickmoveforhisgun.
Hugheswasquicker,drawingtheknifefromthebackofhiswaistband,flingingitathisbarrel-chestedtarget,hittingthemansquareintheheart.Thebigmansanktohiskneesandfellsideways,deadbeforehe
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couldclosehissurprisedeyes.
ThetworemainingWhittbrotherswentfortheirguns.HughesfilledhishandswithhisNavyColts,firingbothpistolssimultaneously,eachoneaimedatitsowntarget.Hehitonebrotherinthegut,buthisothershotmisseditsmark.
Hughescontinuedfiring,movingawayfromthetablewhereLeighselle
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crouchedinhiding,drawingthegunfireawayfromher.Hetriedtomakehiswaytothesafetyoftheheavymahoganybar.Firinghislastshot,heleaptontopoftheservingcounter,scatteringglassesandbottles,takingashottohissideashewentover.
“Ibeenhit,”saidMonroeWhittashedroppedtothefloor,“getmeouttahere.”Heclutchedhisbelly,
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hishandsturningdarkwithblood.
“WhataboutArthur?”RaymondpointedtothemanwithHughes’sknifeburiedhiltdeepinhischest.“Wecan’tleavehim.”
“He’sdead.Leavehim.Getmeoutofhere.”Monroetriedtostandbutsankbacktothefloor,bloodpoolingaroundhisfeet.
Withonepistolreloaded,Hughesroseup
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fromtheshadows,clutchinghisrightsidewithhislefthand,andfired.HehitMonroeagain,adirectshottothethigh.Hughescollapsedontotheslick,coolsurface,semi-awareofhearinganothershot,knowingmorethanfeelinghisbodyflinch.
“Goddamnit,Raymond,Isaidgetmeouttahere.”Monroewaslosingcopiousamountsofbloodfrombothwounds.“Myleg.
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..”Theshotthatstruck
HugheswasfromRaymond’sgun,aimedandfiredinaquickpanicjustbeforehegrabbedMonroebythecollar,dragginghimoutofthetavernanddownthestairs.Throwinghisbrotherontothesaddle,Raymondheavedhimselfupbehindhim,thehorsecrow-hoppinginprotestattheweightofbothmen.Raymonddugin
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hisspurs.Thehorsegallopedoff,withasprayofbloodmistingthemidnightair.
“OhdearGod,Hughes!”Leighsellerushedtohim,wipingthebloodfromhisface.“Please,someone,helpme!”
“I’llrunupstairsandgetDoc,”saidSmitty,thebeefy-armedblacksmithwho’dtakenrefugebehindthebar.
“Noneedtocome
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up,”saidDoctorFlemingsashepeekedoutthedoor.Hemadehiswaydownthestairs.“I’msorry,Leighselle,butMonique...shelosttoomuchblood.Herinjuriesweretoosevere.I’msorry.”
“Hugheshasbeenshot.Pleasehurry.”Leighselle’seyesfilledwithtears.“Oh,mydearMonique.”Sheshookherhead;wordsstungherthroat.
DoctorFlemingsand
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SmittystretchedHughesoutonthebar.“Headwoundappearstobesuperficial.Theonetohissideisanotherstory.Hewon’tmakeitifIdon’tgetinthereandstopthebleeding.Smitty,canyouhelploadhimintomywagon?”
Hughesmoaned,hiseyesopeningandclosing,hisbreathshallow,hisskincoolingandbecomingpaleasthemencarriedhimout.
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Bloodleftawide,redtrailontheplankfloorthatwasstrewnwithdiscardedmasks,feathers,andbrightstreamersineverycoloroftherainbow.
*****Leighselleplacedthetrayoffreshcompressesandstripsofgauzeonthebedsidetable.“Standstill.Letmefinishredressingthesebandages.Iwishyouwouldn’tgo.You’renotready,notstrongenough.”
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“Threeweeksisenoughtimeforhealing.Ican’tlettheirtrailgocold.”Hughesgrittedhisteeth,painshootingthroughhisside.Hethoughtforamomentthatshemightberight....Thenheshookhisheadagainstthenotion.No.Hehadtogo.
“GobackhometoLévesquePlantation,hideoutthereforawhiletillallthisblowsover.”Shewipedherforeheadwiththebackofher
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hand,shovingastraycurlbackintoplace.
“Hideout?”Hughessnorted.“YousawwhatthatbastarddidtoMonique.Heandtheotheronemaybedead,butthere’stwomorewhotriedtokillmefortheeffort.”
HewaspreparedtochasethosesonsofbitchestoHellifhehadto.They’dbebackgunningforhim—ofthathewascertain.What
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kindofmanwouldhebeifheranandhid—wasafraidtofacethefight?He’dbethekindofmanhewouldn’twanttoknow.
“Ouch.”HewincedasLeighselletightenedthebandage.
“You’rebarelyonyourfeet.Youthinkyou’rereadytochaseaftertwooutlaws?Youdon’thavethestrength.”
“I’llfindthe
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strength.”Hughesstrappedon
hisgunsandreachedforhishat,pausingwhileLeighsellefinishedbuttoninghisshirt,afreshbandagecoveringthewoundonhissideandsecuredaroundhiswaist.Heshovedhisshirttailintohiswaistbandandthenputbothhandsonhershoulders.
“I’llbefine.Besides,youknowI’mnotwelcomeathomeanymore.Father’s
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decree.”Hetookadeepbreathandletoutwhatsoundedlikeagrowl.“Ineedtofinishpackingafewthings,thenI’moff.”
“Ican’tpersuadeyouotherwise?”
“No.”Hughesopenedhissaddlebags,takingstockofwhattopack.
“I’llseeyoudownstairs,then.You’llneedabottleofwhiskey—formedicinalpurposes.”
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Leighsellesteppedoutthedoor,shuttingitbehindher,hermossgreentaffetaskirtswishingaroundherankles.
Turning,shesawsomeoneapproaching.“MayIhelpyou?”sheaskedinaloudvoice.
“I’mlookingforsomeone.AmannamedHughesLévesque.Heardhemightbehere.”HeeyedthetrashcanLeighsellewasholding,lookingcloseratthe
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bloodybandages.“He’swounded.Thosehisbandages?Isheinthatroomyoujustcamefrom?”
Leighselletightenedhergriponthetrashcan.“That’smyroomandthis,”shesaid,holdingthecanoutforinspection,“thisis—uh—it’smytimeofthemonth,isall.See?”
RaymondWhittlurchedbackward,turninghisheadaway.“Isthereaman
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herenamedHughesLévesquethatyou’rehiding?”
“I’mnothidinganyone.You’rewelcometolookaround.IheardLévesqueleftforTennessee,though,aboutaweekago.Youmightcatchupwithhim,ifyouhurry.”Leighselletookastepcloser,battinghereyelashes.
“Tennessee?”Hetookastepbackward.
“Um-hm.Mightyou
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beinterestedinalittleplaytime?Discounted,today,ofcourse.”Shepattedthetrashcanandofferedacoysmile.
“Hellno,woman.I’minterestedinfindingLévesque.”Whitttookafewstepsbackward,eyeingthedoorbehindLeighselle.
Leighsellepursued.Then,feigningsurprise,droppedthetrashcan.ItlandedonWhitt’sfeet,thesoiledbandagesspillingon
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hisbootsandsplayingacrossthehallway.ThemesscreatedabloodybarrierthatmightaswellhavebeenabrickwallbetweenWhittandthedoorHughesstoodbehind.
“Goddamnit,woman.”Hedancedbackward,shakinghisfeetfreeofthebloodybandages.“WhatinChrist’snameareyoutryingtodo?”
“Mygoodness.I’mabitclumsysometimes.”Shedroppedtoherknees,bending
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forward,allowingWhittagenerouspeekathercleavage.Pickingupthebloodystripsofgauze,sheasked,“Canyougivemeahandhere,please?”
RaymondWhittbackedawayandmadequickprogressretreatingdownthestairs,hisspurstanglingtogether.“Tennessee?”
“Yes.Chattanooga.”*****
Hugheswasstandingbehind
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thedoor,listening,whenLeighsellereturnedtotheroom.“Youclever,clevergirl,”hesaid,shakinghisheadinastonishment.“That’swhatIcallanout-foxingmaneuver.”
“Iwasafraidyou’dcomeout,gunsa-blazing.”
“Boy,didIwantto,”Hughessaid,twirlingtheloadedchamberofhisColt.“Bidingmytimeisbest.Iplanoncatchingthemoff
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guardwhenthey’renotonthehunt.Butyou—youdeserveanhonor—whatabrilliantperformance.”
“Ithinkonmyfeet.Comingupwithaspontaneousplanwhenthere’stroublebrewingcanmeanthedifferencebetweenlifeanddeath.”
“I’llrememberthat.”Hughesmovedtothesideofthewindow,thechiffoncurtainliftedafraction.“The
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otherbrother’soutthere—guessingtheoneIgut-shot.He’snotsittingtootallinthesaddle.”
Hewatchedthemanasheexitedthesaloonandmounthishorse.Then,thetwoWhittbrothersaimedtheirhorsesnorthoutoftheFrenchQuarter,thehorsesgallopinghoovessplashingthroughtherainpuddlesthatruttedthemuddylane.
“Marchisstillcoldat
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night.Takewarmclothes.Didyoupackablanket?”
Hughessmiledather.“Yes,mother.”
Leighsellewinced.“I’mnotyourmother,”shesaid,piercinghimwithasharplook.
“I’msorry.WhatdidIsay?”Hugheslookedstricken.
“Nothing.Nevermind.I’mconcernedaboutyou.”
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“Iappreciateyourconcern.IgrewuproughingitwhenOkwarawouldletmetagalongonhoghunts.IthinkIcanhandleTexasinthespring.Comehere.”HewrappedhisarmsaroundLeighselle,thenkissedthetopofherhead.“Ioweyoumylife.Ifyoueverneedanything,I’mforeverinyourdebt.”
“Willyoubecomingback?”
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“Idon’tknow.Fathermadeitclearthatafterwhathecalledmy‘latestshenanigans,’thatI’mnotwelcomeathome.Hestuffedmypocketsfullofmoneyandthenshowedmethedoor.ThankGodmybrotherbroughtmehere.”Heshruggedhisshoulders,hisambereyescloudedwithpain.
“You’realwayswelcomeatmydoor.Come,
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I’llwalkyoudownstairs.You’llneedthatbottleofwhiskeywhenitcomestimetochangingthosebandages.”
Hughessprintedthefourblockstotheliverystabletofetchhishorse,notwantingtoputtoomuchtimebetweenhimselfandtheWhitts.Holdinghisside,feelinglightheaded,hefoughtoffwavesofmind-splittingpainandgut-emptyingnausea.
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*****Smittyrubbedhisdirtyhandsdownhisapron,thefireboxbehindtheanvilglowingbrightorange.Hepickedupared-hothorseshoewithheavywrought-irontongsandlayitonananvil.Aftergivingitafewwhackswithaflat-headedhammer,heimmerseditinabucketofwater.Steamroseinagraycirclethateclipsedhisround,baldhead.
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“Theywerehere,”saidSmitty.“AskedifIknewyou—askedhowlongsinceyouleftforTennessee.Isaid,‘Tennessee?Hell,hedidn’tgotoTennessee.ThatboywenttoTexas.’Ithinkthatconfused’emabit.”
Hughesledhismareoutofthestallandthrewhissaddleacrossherback,wincingashedidso,tyingtheblanketandrainslickerbehindthecantle.“Iwonder
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whichwaytheywent.”“Oh,theyargued.
Almostcametoblows.OnesaidTennessee,buttheysureashelldidn’tleavehereheadedeast.Theother’n,theonewiththegutshotandlegwound,saidTexas.Guesshe’stheboss.Theyrodewest.”
*****Theirtrailprovedtooeasytofollow.Hughesreinedhishorsebackafewtimessoas
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nottorideupontherecklesspairwholeftcarelessclues.Crickets,owls,andcoyotesfilledthefrostynightwiththeirsongsasstarsfilledtheexpansivedarknessfromcornertocornerwiththeirsparklinglight.Springwasstillafewweeksaway.Thecoolingoftheearthatnightleftaheavydewontheground,makingawetsnakingtrackwherethehorsespassed.
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Hughesyawnedandstretched,ignoringthepainstillpulsinghotonhisside.Hethoughtofchangingthebandagesashetouchedhiswound,feelingawetstickinessthroughhisshirt.HewouldhavechangeditiftheWhittseverstoppedtorest,butitappearedasiftheyplannedonridingallnight.Theotherwoundfromthesuperficialgrazingofthebulletjustabovehisrightear
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leftafaintscar,hishairalreadygrowingoverandhidingit.
Dawnwashedtheeasternhorizoninshadesofnight-dissolvingpink,theforestsoundshushingasthesunroseintoasilentsky.TheWhittspulledoffthetrailandledtheirhorsesintoathicketofold-growthpinesodensethesun’sraysstrainedtoreachtheground.Theretheymadecamp.
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Hughesrodehismareintheoppositedirectionasafedistanceaway,puttingheronapicketlinetograze.Then,wrappinghimselfinablanket,helaydownnexttowherehishorsewastied.Hefellintoalight,feverishsleep.
Thescreechingofahawkhighoverheadawokehim,thesunhalfwaythroughitsarcacrossthesky.Hughessatup,listeningtothepiney
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woods,orientinghimself.Thepaininhissideradiatedoutinfieryhotfingersthattuggedoneverynerve.Agulpofwhiskeyfromthebottleinhissaddlebagnumbedthepainandclearedhisheadjustenough.
He’dchangethebandageslater.ItwastimetoseewhatwashappeningattheWhittcamp.Gunsinhand,hesneakedthroughthewoods,carefulnottomakea
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sound.Hughessmiledand
thankedthestarsaboveformakingthissoeasy.RaymondandMonroeWhittlayonthefarsideoftheirfirenexttoarockyoutcropping,anemptybottleofwhiskeybetweenthem.Theinjuredmanmoanedinhisblanket,whichwasbloodyandwetwitharustybrownstain,thesmallcampfireofferingupathinstringofpalegray
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smoke.“I’mcold,Raymond.
Getupandstirthatfirebacktolife.”Monroe’svoicesoundedraspyandweak.“AndI’mthirsty.Gimmeasipofwhiskey.”
RaymondWhittrolledover,theblanketthatwascoveringhimfallingaway.Hesatup,cursing.“Well,shit.Can’tamanevengetsomesleep?”Hehobbledovertothefireandbeganto
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pokeitwithastick.“Ain’tnomorewhiskey.”
“I’mthirsty,brother.I’mhurting.Justputabulletinmeandgetitoverwith,”Monroebegged.
“Holdyourhorses.I’mstirringthefire.”
Hughescreptinfurther,duckingbehindthetrunkofanenormouspinoaktree.Assessingthesituation,formingaplan,hepickedatthedirtunderhisnails,
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scrapingthemcleanwithatwig.Goon,Raymond,hethought,giveyourbrothersomewater.Steponoverthere,niceandclose.
“I’mthirsty...”Monroe’svoicefadedawaytoawhimper.
“Well,I’mcold.Iwantcoffee.”Raymondbusiedhimselfwiththetaskathand,stirringtheashes,thefirecracklingtolifeonceagain.
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“Water.Now.”“Damnit,Monroe,we
shouldaheadedtoTennessee.”Raymondspunaround,stirstickinhand,thrustingitintheairforemphasis.“Thatbitchatthetavernsaidthat’swhereLévesquewent.Butno.Youtooktheblacksmith’sword.We’vebeeningoddamnedTexasadayandahalfnowandain’tseenasinglesign.Notaone.Nowyou’redying,
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andit’llbeonmealonetofindLévesqueandkillhim,whereverthehellheis.WeshouldagonetoTennessee.”
“I’mtheonewiththegutwoundandyou’retheonebellyaching—”
“Tennessee,”insistedRaymond.“Tennessee.”
“Putabulletinmeandgetitoverwith.AtleastIwon’thavetolistentoyouharponaboutTennessee.”Monroe,feverishand
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moaning,rolledbackandforthinhisblanket,clutchinghisdistendedbellythatwasoozingblood.“Water.I’mthirsty...”
“Yougotagun.Doityourself,”saidRaymondoverhisshoulder.
“Goddamnyou,”moanedMonroe.“Suicide’sasuretickettohell.”
“Ithinkmurderingyourbrother’llgetyouthere,too.”
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HugheswatchedasRaymondpickedupacanteenandrosetohisfeet,shufflingtowhereMonroelayshiveringontheground.Heopenedthecanteenandliftedhisbrother’sheadwithonehand,pouringatrickleofwaterintohismouth.
Now.Go.Hughesrushedfrom
behindtheoaktree,apistolineachhand.HecoveredthedistancetotheWhittsinlong,
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ground-clearingstrides.“Getyourhandsintheair,bothofyou,”heshouted,“orI’llshoot.I’vehadenoughofallyourfuckingarguing.”
RaymonddroppedboththecanteenandMonroe’shead,thenstoodup,handsintheair.“Don’tshoot,mister.”
“Youontheground,easeyourhandsoutofthatblanket.Letmeseethem.Niceandslow.”
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Anoisecomingfrombehind,twigssnapping,ahorsenickering,causedHughestodiverthiseyestothesideafractionofasecond.Inthatmoment,Raymonddrewhisgun,fumbling,pullingthetriggertoosoon.ThebulletstruckthegroundatHughes’sfeet,sprayingdirtintotheair.Hughesfiredback,thebulletrippingaholethroughtheheartofRaymond,sending
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himsprawlingbackward,spread-eagletotheground.
Awhite-hot,searingpaintorethroughHughes’sleftshoulder—theflashingofagun—theloudpopechoinginhisear.Theforcefromtheblastspunhimaround,knockinghimoffhisfeet.
Ontheground,Monroecrawledoutfromtheblanket,guninhand.Hestoodbutsankdowntohisknees,strugglingtoholdthe
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weightoftheweapon.Hebroughtthepistolup,grippingitinbothhandsslipperywithblood.Unsteady,shaking,heblinkedhiseyesinrapidsuccessioninanapparentefforttokeephistargetinfocus.
Rollingoveronhisbelly,ignoringthepainunderneaththebloodybandageonhisside,Hughestookquickaim.Hefired,sendingMonroeWhitttojoin
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hisbrothersinhell.Thewhoosh-clickofa
shotgunbeingreadiedjustbehindhisheadcausedhimtofreeze—andthentocomplywiththe“getuponyourfeetandputyourhandsintheair”command.Thevoicewaspatientandpleasant,gentleyetassertive,thekindofvoicethatcouldtalkakidintogivingupapieceofcandyorconvinceahornetintonotstinging.
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“Tossyourgunsoverhere,thenhandsintheair,”saidthepleasantvoice.
Hughesstoodanddidashewastold.Twomenhecouldsee,onewiththeshotgun,anotherbehindinthetrees.Hetossedhisgunsontheground,shovedhishandsintheair.
“What’syourname,mister?”Thetall,thinmanstoodunderalargebrownhatthathidhiseyesandthetop
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halfofhisface,histhick,blackmustachecoveringhismouthandthebottomhalf.Hisslow,easywordsdrippedlikethick,richmolasses.
“HughesLévesque.”“Where’reyoufrom,
andwhyareyouhere?”heaskedwithanicetonetohisvoice.
“NewOrleans.Trackingtheseoutlaws.”
“You’reassparsewithyourwordsasyouare
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yourbullets.”“I’mefficient.”“Lookslikeyou
trackedthemallright—trackedthemtothegatesofhell.”
“Theytriedtokillmefirst.Ishotindefense.MyplanwastotakethembacktoNewOrleanswheretheirbrothersDaltonandArthurpaidthesamepricefortryingtokillme.ThesetwoareRaymondandMonroe
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Whitt.”“Weknowwhothey
are,son,andsawwhathappened,”saidagravellyvoicedmansteppingoutfromthetrees.“We’vecomefromOrleans.Heardwhathappenedthere.Wesuspecteditmightbeyouwhowasfollowingthesetwo.”
“We’vebeenaftertheWhittsforsometime,”saidthepleasant,hattedman
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holdingtheshotgun.“Lookslikeyoumadetidyworkwiththeminshortorder.”
“Hell,Ididn’tknowwhotheywereuntiltwodaysago.Ihadnoquarrelwiththem,untilwhathappenedtoMonique.ThenIhadaquarrel.”Handsstillintheair,Hughes’sshoulderthrobbed.Heignoredit.
“Well,son,youdidusafavor,”saidthemanwiththegravellyvoice.“Seems
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youhaveaknackfortrackingandkilling.Yououghttothinkaboutjoiningupwithus.”
“I’mnotsomecommonbrigandlookingtojoinupwithanoutlawgang,”saidHughes,thewoundtohisshoulderdrippingwithblood.
“We’renotoutlaws,son.We’reTexasRangers.”
*****September28,1860
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ThetrainpulledintoNewOrleansStation,itsshrillwhistledrawingHughesoutofadeepsleep.Hepressedhisforearmagainstthefoggywindow,swipingaclearcircle,allowingawatery,distortedviewoftheplatform.John-Pierrestoodshivering,handsinpockets,hatpulleddown,coatcollarturnedupagainsttheautumnchill.Heneverdidtaketotheoutdoors.Itwasn’teventhat
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coldoutside.Hughessteppedonto
theplatformandthebrothersshookhands,thenembracedinaquickhug.Exchangingpleasantries,theymadetheirwaytothestation’scaféwheretheyspentanhourdrinkingcoffee,tellingstories,andreminiscing.
Beforelong,John-Pierrepulledhiswatchfromhispocket,apologizingforhavingtoleavesosoon.
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Businessdemandedit.Thetwobrothersembracedagain—longer,tighter—beforeJohn-Pierredeparted,disappearingthroughthecrowdofuniformedsoldiersmillingaboutthetrainstation.
Hughessatawhilelongerandsippedanothercoffee.Everywherehelooked,hesawsoldiers.Young,fresh-facedboyspumpingfistsintheair,eagerforexcitement,eagerfor
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adventure,eagerforthechancetoprovetheirmanhood.Eagertodie.
Theyspokeaboutgoingtowar,theirvoicesfilledwiththeenthusiasmandenergyofyouth,asif“War”wereawelcomingplacetoputyourbagsdownandstayawhile.Somewouldstay—foreternity.Butmaybetherewouldn’tbeawar.Maybethisnextpresidentialelectionwouldsteerthecountryaway
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fromthat.Theseboysshouldstayboysalittlelonger.
Hughessawloverskissinglingeringgood-byes,mothersandfathersembracingsonseagertopullawayandboardthetrains,andteary-eyedwivesandchildrenwavingassoldier-fathersdisappearedintothickcrowds.Afeelingthathewasmissingout,thathewasnotreachingforsomethingthatheshouldtakeatighterhold
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of,washedoverhimashethoughtabouthisbrother.
Buthecouldn’thavethat.Hecouldn’thavewhatJohn-Pierrehad—awifeandachild,withanotherontheway.Afamily.Peoplewhoneedanddependonhim.Hisbrotherhadtheluxuryofworryingaboutthesafetyofhiswifeandchild.Hugheswouldneverknowthatluxury.Worryingaboutsomeonewhoneededhim
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wouldalterthewayhethought—thewayhereacted—withdangerousconsequences.Heknewtheluxuryofunencumberedwork,andtheexcitementofanewmission.
Hedrummedhisfingersonthetable,afamiliarrestlessnessrisingupfromwithin.Hismotherhadsentamessageofherlovewithoutaninvitationforhimtocomehomeforavisit.Fatherwas
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athome,illandresting,hisbrotherhadsaid.Alltheseyearslaterandhewasstillnotwelcomethere.Heunderstood.Andreally,hedidn’tmissit,thatplaceheusedtocall“home.”
Hughessluggeddowntherestofhiscoffeeandthenstrolledoutofthestationcaféovertowherethemarestoodtied.Shewassaddledinexpensivehand-tooledtackwithroses,oakleaves,and
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acornscarvedintothedark,oiledleather.Thepolishedbrassfittingsgleamed,thestitchingstraightandperfect.Matchingsaddlebagshungonbothsides,andabedrollandslickerwasaffixedtothecantle.Shewasshodandreadytogo,justashe’drequested.
Hughesopenedoneofthesaddlebagstostorehissmallvaliseinside.Therewasbarelyenoughroom.The
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saddlebagswerestuffedfullofhismother’susualgiftsshemailedtohishotel:linens,money,goldcoins,pewterplates,thingseveryRangermightneedonthetrail.
Shovinghisleftbootintothestirrup,heswungoverandsettleddownintothesaddle.Nowthis—thisfeelslikehome.Hesmiled.TurningawayfromNewOrleansStation,Hughesrelaxedintoaneasytrot,the
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finemorningmistburningawayastheearlyautumnsunwarmedhisback,followinghimwest.
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CHAPTERNINEOCTOBER26,1860
Therobuststagedriverpulledthefrothymulestoastopandclimbeddownfromhisperch.Heswungthecoachdooropen,grabbingtheclosestbagofmailinhisglovedhands.“Well,boys,thisistheendoftheline.WelcometoSaintJoseph,Missouri.”
“Canyoutellus
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wherewecanfindthePonyExpressstables?”Barleighloweredherselffromthedustycabofthewagon,heftingthesaddleupontohershoulder.Amixtureofanxietyandexcitementbubbledwithin,andshetookadeepbreath,hopingtokeepthosefeelingssubdued.
Stoneyfollowedclosebehindwithhisdirtybedroll.Twothickstrapsofgreasybrownleatherheldhis
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belongingstogether,keepingthecontentsinsidefromspillingout—atincup,afork,athreadbare,button-lesscoat.
Withoutslowinghisrhythmofslingingmailbagsoutofthestagecoachandintothewaitingarmsofalankykidwearingapostalclerk’suniform,thedrivergruntedafewwordsandthumbedoverhisshoulder,indicatingthelargecedarandbrickstructurebehindhim.
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“Muchobliged,sir,andthankyoufortheride,”saidStoney,tippinghishatasthetwostrodeovertothestables.
Thebuilding’sarchedentrywaywaswideenoughtoaccommodateawagonorateamofhorsesbeingmovedabout.Anoverheadsignread“Pike’sPeakStables.”Insidethecavernousbarn,thesmellofsweatyhorses,manure,sweetoats,oiledleather,and
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alfalfahaymingledtogethertocreateaheadyaroma.Thearomainducedbothmelancholyandfeelingsofcomfortatthesametime.Barleighfeltrightathome.
“Excuseme,sir,”Barleighsaid,walkingovertowhereasprite,baldingmanwithaquickpitchforkwasfillinghaytroughs.“We’relookingforthePonyExpressStables.ThissignheresaysPike’sPeak—”
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“You’reintherightplace.TheCentralOverlandCaliforniaandPike’sPeakExpressCompany,alsoknownasthePonyExpress.Name’sAugustOlsen.WhatcanIdoyoufor?”Hekeptforkinghayintothefeedtroughs,yethiswelcomingsmileandfriendlystyleinvitedconversation.
“Well,sir,Mr.Olsen,sir,I’mStoneyWooten.Thishere’sBarFlanders.Wecame
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tohireonasPonyExpressriders.”Stoneyheldoutthewaybilladvertisingthejob,thesametypeofpaperthatblewdownthestreetinFortWorthandlandedatBarleigh’sfeet.
“Youcancallme‘August.’I’mthestationmanager,”hesaidwithaslightSwedishaccent.“YouneedtoseeMr.Waddellaboutapplyingforajob.He’stheowner.Oneof’em,
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anyway.There’sthreeof’em.”
“WherecanwefindMr.Waddell?”Barleighasked,keepinghervoicemeasured.
“OveryonderatthePateeHouse.Thebigfour-storyhoteltwoblockseast’ohereonthecornerofTwelfthandPennStreets.YoucanfindthePonyExpressofficethere.TellMr.WaddellIsentyou.”
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“Thankyou,sir,”theybothsaid,turningtoleavebeforeOlsen’swordsdrewthembackaround.
“Dangerousjob,youknow.WhatmakesyouboyssoeagertobeExpressriders?Riskingdeathdaily?Orphanspreferred?Thosearen’tjustwordsonpaper.”AugustOlsenleanedonhispitchfork,hiscleargrayeyesnotblinking.
Barleighshuffledher
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feet,kickingataclodofdirtontheground,waitingforStoneytoanswer.LettingStoneyactasthespokespersonwasgoingtobethebeststrategyinkeepingheridentityhidden,she’ddecided,andStoneyneverseemedshyaboutspeakingup.
“It’smightygoodwagesforsittingonahorse,”Stoneysaid.“Hell,Idonethatforfreeallmylife.Now
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someone’swillingtopaymetoraceaponybackn’forth?That’sariskIwon’tmindtaking,consideringthehighwagesoffered.”
“Knowwhatyou’regettinginto,boys.Thisain’tafrolickingponyrideinthepark,”saidAugust,rakingadirtysleeveacrosshisbaldhead.“There’smanyriskstoconsider.Theharshweather—yourbonesfreezinginthewinter—thesunbakingyou
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aliveinthesummer.Monotony.Boredom.Ridingfourteenhours—hunger.Longstretchesofteeth-itchingthirst.Thunderstorms.Blizzards.Midnight,gallopingfulloutoverhazardousterrainwhereyoucan’tseeshit.Highnoon,theglareofthesunburningyoureyeballsthatarealreadyscratchedtohellfromdustandsand.And,ifthat’snotenoughriskyexcitementfor
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you—you’llbeduckingfromangryIndiansanddodginggun-slingingoutlaws.”
“I’vefacedbiggerrisksdodgingmypa’sdrunkenfists,”Stoneysaidasheturnedonhisheelandhurriedoutofthebarn.
“Muchobliged,sir.”BarleighrushedafterStoneyandtheyheadedeasttowardthePateeHouseHotel.
Thered-brick,four-storybuildingwithwhite
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woodenarchesandornatecarvedwindowmoldingswasashorttwoandahalfblocksfromthestables.Onitswide,columnedfrontporchwereladiesunderparasolstakingafternoontea;theywereseatedatdaintytablestotheleftandtotherightofthecenterstepsleadingtothedoublearchedentrywaydoors.Movingupanddownthestepsenteringandexitingthehotelwasahectic
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networkofhatted,suitedmenscuttlingaboutasifoncriticalbusinessrequiringurgentattention.
Uponenteringthehotel,Barleighglancedaroundandspottedadoorattheendofthemainhallway.Theetchedglassontheupperhalfofthedoorshowedamountedriderbentlowovertheneckofhisponyrunningatfullgallop.
“Thatlooks
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promising,”Stoneysaid,pointingdownthehall.“Let’strythatoffice.”TheboyfromFrogLevel,Arkansas,dirtanddustmarringhisfaceandclothes,marchedwithhisshouldersback,headhighdownthefancycorridoramongthewell-suitedbusinessmen.Hewalkedwiththepostureofonemovingamonghispeers.
Thebrassnameplateonthedoorread“Russell,
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Majors,andWaddell–COC&PPEC.”Ashadowmovingagainsttheetchedglass—amuffledvoicestammeringontheothersideofthedoor—pausedwhenBarleighknocked.
“Comein,”boomedavoicefrominside.
Takingadeepbreath,Barleighfilledherlungs,lettingtheairseepoutslowly.Herhandonthedoorknob,shebreathedinagain,heldit
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amoment,then,turningtheknob,strodewithpurposeintothelight-filledroom,whichshimmeredinthelateafternoonsun.
“MayIhelpyou?”ThenameplateonthedeskbelongedtoMr.WilliamBradfordWaddell.Thestockymansatinanox-bloodleatherupholsteredchairwithbrassnail-headtrim.Hehadapleasantfacedespitethecornersofhiseyesandhis
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mouthbeingslanteddownwardinaperpetualpout.
“Yes,sir.We’reheretoapplyforthejob.”Stoneyheldoutthewaybilladvertisement.“We’reyournewPonyExpressriders.Sir.”
Mr.Waddellleanedbackinhischair,chewinghisunlightedcigarbetweenclenchedteeth.“Youwiththesaddle,what’syournameand
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age?”“BarFlanders,sir.
Eighteen.”“Andyou?”“I’mStoneyWooten,
sir.I’malsoeighteen.”“What’syourstory,
youngMr.Flanders?Orphan?Runaway?Experiencedatridingandshooting?”
“Orphan.Expertrider,accurateshot.”Ablushbegantoblossomandshefoughthardtoforceitdown.
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Braggingonherselfwasawkward,butthetruthwasthetruth.
“You’resmallforeighteen.Itookyouforfourteen,maybefifteen.Butthesmallerthebetterforfasterriding.Lessweightforthehorsetohaularound.Andyou,Mr.Wooten.What’syourstory?”
“Iain’tnoorphan,justnotwelcomeathomenomore.Igroweduponthe
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backofahorseandain’tneverfallenoff.Mounted,atfullgallop,Icanshootarabbitandonlywasteonebullet.That’sifIdon’thavearockandaslingshottousefirst—whichIprefer.I’mprettyhandywithhurlingstones.That’showIgotmyname,Stoney.Idon’tremembermygivenname.Itwasn’tusedmuch.IthinkitwasWalter.OrmaybeIjusthopeditwasthatandnot
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Owen.Owen’smypa’sname.”
“Oneofyouismightysparsewithyourwords,theotherquitegenerous,”saidWaddell.“Well,tellyouwhat.We’reholdingtryoutsaweekfromtomorrowmorningateighto’clockattheExpressstablesifyou’reinterestedinapplyingforthejob.”
“Yes,sir.What’sthetryout?”Barleighasked.
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“WeholdtryoutraceseveryotherSaturdayofthemonth.It’sbecomequitethespectatorevent—apopularopportunityforfriendlywageringamongthelocals.Sofar,they’llbefiveriderscompeting,includingyoutwo.You’llmountyourhorse,ridetotheEllwoodferry,andtakeitacrosstheriver—racetotheTroyrelaystation,dismount,shootattwomarkedtargets,remount
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afreshhorse,andthenracebackhere.Ifit’satieforfirstplace,whichhasn’thappenedyet,thewinnerwillbetheriderwhoreturnswithhishorseinthebestconditionasdeterminedbyAugustOlsen,ourstationmanager.Anyquestions?”
“Howmanyridersoutofthefivegethiredon?”Stoneyasked.
“Two.Oneotherwemightuseasastockhandler.
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Anythingelse?”“HowfarisTroy
Station?”Barleighasked,shiftingthesaddlefromonehandtotheother.
“FifteenmilesfromEllwoodFerry.Fifteenmilesback.Mycuriosity’sgottenthebestofme.Whyareyoucarryingthatsaddle?”Waddellasked,usinghisunlitcigarasapointer.
“Amidnightstormspookedawaymyhorse.This
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belongedtoUncleJack.He’sdeadnow.”HearingherselfspeakthosewordsaloudgaveBarleighapeculiarsensation,andsheloweredhereyes.
“Isee.Well,ifyouneedaplacetosleep,tellAugustIsaidtogiveyouanemptystallinthebarn.Thehay’ssoftandthecompany’sbetterthanwhatyoumightfindatthelocaltavern.I’llseeyouboththereaweekfromtomorrowmorning.
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Goodluckintherace.And,trytostayoutoftroubleforaweek.That’sthehardestpartforyoungriders.”
“Thankyou,sir,”theysaidinunison.
AfterleavingtheofficeoftheCOC&PPEC,Barleighdecidedabathafterfourdaysofdustytravelinginanenclosedcoachwouldbetheperfectendtotheday.Shedroppedhersaddleoffatthestablesandgotdirections
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fromAugustOlsenwheretogetabath.
“Ican’taffordabath,”saidStoney,jinglingthecoinsinhispocket.“I’lljustheaddowntotheriverandwashupthere.Saveyourmoneyandcomewithme.Riverwater’sfree.”
“Thanksjustthesame.Along,hotsoakinabathtubisfivecentswellspent.”She’dhavepaidtwicethat.
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*****Mostbusinessesintownweredecoratedinred,white,andbluebuntinginanticipationofthepresidentialelectionafewdaysaway.Doorsandwindowsweredraped,postswerewrapped,ribbonshungfromawnings,andcontentiousargumentsfilledtheair.
“Let’sgotothesaloon,”saidStoney.“We’vebeenhereallweekeating
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nothingbutbeansandcornbread.Ineedsomethingmoresubstantialbeforethetryoutstomorrowmorning.IthinkIcanaffordasliceofbaloneyiftheysliceitthin.”
Walkingtothesaloonfromthestables,theypassedseveraldifferentgroupsofmenstandingaroundonsidewalksorgatheredaroundporches,allinvolvedinheateddebatesabouttheelection.Barleighkepther
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earsopenandhermouthclosed,thoughshewastemptedtothrowheropinionintotheargument.ShefeltinherheartthatAbrahamLincolnwouldbethebestleaderforthecountry.Ifshewereaman,that’swho’dgethervote.
“Takeyourpickoftables,friends.Theplaceisprettyquiettonight.Sofar.”Thebartendercontinuedtowashglassesashespoke,
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lookinguponcewhenhefirstheardthedoorsswingopenandshut.“WhatcanIgetyou?”
Theysatatoneofthetwotablesbythefrontwindowtowatchthepeoplewalkingby.IntownaweekandbothStoneyandBarleighstillmarveledatthemassofpeoplemovingabout.Theoneotherpersoninthebarwassittingattheotherwindowtable,apparentlyalso
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enjoyingtheview.“Bringustwosteak
platesandtwobeers,please.”Barleighwonderedwhatbeertastedlike.“Andtwocoffees.”Amanlymeal.
“Steak?We’renotPonyExpressridersyet,”Stoneysaid,laughingoutloud.“Makemineaplateoffriedtatersandathinsliceofbaloneyifyouhaveit,andaglassofwater.”Hejingledthechangeinhispocket.
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“Baloneybudget,notsteakbudget.”
“I’llbuy.Youcanreciprocateafterwegethiredontomorrow.We’llbenumbersoneandtwocomingback.Iknowit.”TherewasnodoubtinhermindthatsheandStoneywouldwintherace.
“I’llletyoubenumberone,then,sinceyou’rebuyingthesteak,”Stoneysaidwithagrin.
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“Thanks,Bar.BeenalongtimesinceI’vetastedsteak.”
ThegentlemanattheadjoiningtabletoBarleigh’sbackleanedinclose.“Excusemeforintrudingintoyourconversation.DidIhearyousayyouwerePonyExpressriders?”
Stoneychimedin.“Notyet.Wetryoutinthemorning.Butbynoontomorrow,wewillbe,youcanbankonit.”Heleanedon
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thebacktwolegsofhischair,grinning.
Barleighremainedquiet,hopingthemanwouldturnbackaroundtohistable.
“Ain’tthatright,Bar?We’llbethebesttworidersthatcompany’sseen.We’llshowthemothersathingortwo’boutracingponies.”Stoneybroughthischairbackdownonallfours,stillgrinningfromeartoear.
“That’sright,
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Stoney,”Barleighsaid,fidgetinginherchair.
“MayIintroducemyself?”thegentlemanasked.“I’mwritingalettertoafriendofminebackhomeaboutthePonyExpress.I’dlovetobeabletosayI’vemetacoupleoftheriders,especiallyifthey’regoingtobethebestinPonyExpresshistory.”Hescootedhischairawayfromthetable.
Barleighsensedhim
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standingbehindher.Anxietyknottedherstomach.Shedidn’twelcomethisstranger’sintrusion.Butshetoldherselftorelax;everyone’sacceptedherasaboy—noneedtoworry.Shehalfstood,halfturnedaround,halflookedup,gavehalfanod,andstuckoutherhand.
“BarFlanders.Pleasedtomeetyou.”Onepump,firmmanlyhandshake,
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sitbackdown,eyesonthetable,letStoneydothetalking.
“HughesLévesque.Pleasedtomeetyou,too.I’dbehonoredtobuyyourdinnerforachancetointerviewtwoactualridersandgetsomefirsthandfactsformyletter.”HesmiledandlookedatStoney.
“Ain’tridersjustyet.”Stoneystood,offeredhishand,andintroducedhimself.
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“Butgivenyourgenerousoffer,you’rewelcometositatourtable.I’lltalkaslongasyouwanttolisten.I’lltellyouallaboutourinterviewlastweekwithMr.Waddellandaboutthetryoutstomorrow.”
Hughes,takingthewindowseat,said,“It’smypleasure,Stoney.”
“IthinkIcouldgetusedtothis,gettingpaidtotalk,thengettingpaidtoride
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afasthorse—twothingsI’mnaturallygoodat.”Forapoorcountrybumpkin,Stoneyhadthetruepolishofapolitician.Hetoldastorythatlastedfarlongerthantheactualinterview.
ThoughStoneywastheonetalking,everytimeBarleighchancedapeek,shecaughtthegentlemanlookingather.Notstaring,justafeweasyglances.Somethingabouthiseyes,somethingin
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thewayhewasn’tshyaboutlookingather,wasn’tquicktomovehiseyesaway,gaveherthefeelingthatthiscouldbetrouble.
*****StoneyandBarleighwokebeforedawnandsharedasmallbreakfastofhardbiscuitsandthelastofwhatremainedoftheFrenchroastedcoffeebeans.Lingeringamoment,enjoyingthefinalaromaand
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taste,BarleightoastedtoMr.Templetonwiththelastsipfromhertincup,rememberinghiskindnessandhopinghefoundwarmwaters.
“Isleptlikeastinkingdeadman.Bellyfullofsteakandbeerishowamanshouldgotosleepeverynight.Better,even,ifinawoman’sarm’s,toboot.”Stoneyrolleduphisbedrollandshookthehayfromhisclothes.
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“Yep.”Barleighputhercupaway.
“Course,afterspendingfournightsandfivedayssittinginagoddamnedstagecoach,thenaweeksleepinginafeedtroughwithhorsesnippingatyourhairwilldothattoaman,too.Yousleepallright?”
“Yep,”shesaid,pullingonhercoat.
“Youdon’twastetoomuchenergyonwords,I’ve
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noticed.”“Don’tneedtowith
youaround.”BarleighsmiledandclappedStoneyontheback.
“Youtworeadytojointheothers?”askedAugustOlsen,leadingayellowdunmustangmareandadarksealbrowngeldingoutoftheirstalls.“Theothertworidersalreadypickedouttheirmounts.WhichofyouwantsBigBrownie?”
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StoneyandBarleighlookedateachotherandshrugged.
“I’lltakeBrownie.Remindsmeofmyoldhorsebackhome,”saidStoney,takingtheleadropefromAugust.Withgentleyetassertivehands,hecheckedthegelding’slegsandfeet,lookingforheatortenderness.“Bigboned—Ilikethatinahorse.”
Barleightookthedun
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mareandranahanddownherfrontcannonbone,overthefetlock,andtriedtopickupherhoof.Themare,withearsflattened,swungherheadaround,nippingBarleigh’sshoulderhardenoughtodrawblood.
“Ah,alittlefeisty,eh?”Barleighsaid,wincing,rubbinghershoulder.
Augustlaughed.“Don’tturnyourbackonher,butonceyou’reinthesaddle,
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you’resafeenough.She’sfast—hangontight.BigBrownie’sfast,too,thoughhedon’tlooklikemuch.”
“Ithoughttherewerefiveofustryingout,”saidStoneyastheyledtheirhorsesoutintothemorning’ssoftgraylight.
“One’salreadydroppedout.Saidhismaandpadidn’twanthimgone.So,justthefourofyouleft.Tieyourponiesoveryondernext
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tothemothers,thenallyouboyscomeonoverhere.”Augustwavedtheothertwoover.
“Ouroddsjustgotbetter.Weonlygottobeattwonow,”whisperedStoneywithabiggrinonhisface.“Wecanboxthemin.Youandme’llstayoutfront.Workasateam.Keepthemtwoinourdust.”
“It’dbeunwisetounderestimateyoucountry
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boysfromFrogLevel,”saidBarleigh,andshemeantit.
“Here’showthisworks,”saidAugust.“WhenIsay‘Go,’youruntowherethesaddlesandbridlesaresetoutoveryonderlinedupnexttothatwatertrough.Pickoutyourgearandgetyourponytackedup.Getyourassinthesaddle,thenhightailitdownFrancisStreettotheEllwoodFerry,whereit’swaitingforyou.Takeitacrosstheriver
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andthenhightailittoTroyStation.It’safifteen-milestraightshotofftheferrydowntheCaliforniaRoad.Oncethere,getoffyourhorse.There’llbesomeonetheretohandittowho’llhaveanotherhorsesimilarincolortotheoneyourodeinon.That’showyou’llknowwhotorideto.They’llpointyoutoyourtarget.Shootyourtarget—notsomeoneelse’s.They’llgiveyouascoreona
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pieceofpaper.Bringitbackorit’scountedazero.Hightailitbackhere.Firstonebackwins.Takecarethatyoudon’trunyourhorseintotheground.Adeadhorsealwaysmakesitbacklast.Anyquestions?”
“Yes,sir.”Barleighsteppedforward.“Willtheferrybewaitingonuswhenwegetbacktoreturnustothissideoftheriver?Andwhat’stheallottedtime?”
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“Theferrywillhavemadeitsround-robinbeforeyougetbackfromTroyStationandwillbewaiting.Itshouldtakeyouaminimumofthreehoursround-tripifyouuseacombinationofwalk,trot,andgallop.Remember,don’trunyourponytodeath.Iftwoofyagetbackatthesametime,therideronthebestconditionedhorsewins.Ifit’sstillatieasjudgedbyme,thenyour
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targetscorecomesintocount.Bytheway,”saidAugustwithawide,toothygrin,“besidesgettinghiredonasaPonyExpressrider,thewinnergetsabonusofthisfive-dollargoldpiece,anincentivefromRussell,MajorsandWaddell.”
Therewere“whoops”andshoutsofboastfulchallengeamongthefourridersastheylinedupandwaitedtohearAugustshout
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thecommand“go.”“Look,”Stoney
pointed.“Thatsaddleontheend’sliketheoneyoudrugupherewithyoufromTexas.Youwantthatone?”
“Yep.”“I’llblockandtake
theonenexttoit.”Barleighsawthe
otherseyeingit,too.Lightweightandmoremaneuverablethantheotherheaviersaddles,itcouldmean
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thedifferencebetweenwinningandlosingwhenpoundscounted.Shewantedthatsaddle.
Theword“go”rangout.StoneyblockedtheothertwoandsherantotheMcClellanthatlayonthegroundatthefarendnexttothetrough.ThesaddlelookedidenticaltotheonethathadbelongedtoUncleJack.Barleighthoughtitmustbeasignofgoodluckorfortune
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smilingdownonher—itcalmedherwithin—asaswarmofactivitybuzzedallaround.
Withquickhands,shetackedupthemarewithoutgettingbitagain,hoppedintothesaddle,spunheraround,andraceddowntowardtheferryinlessthantwominutes.
Stoneyfollowedrightbehind,trailedbyalong,lean,freckle-facedkidnamed
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FordDewarridingaflea-bittengraymarethatwhinniedandpranced,headhigh.Thefourthchapstruggledtogetasaddleonhishorsewithoutmuchcooperationfromtherecalcitrantgelding.
Theypulledthehorsesupandtrottedside-by-side,thethreemakingittotheferrysimultaneously,leavingthefourthriderbehind.
“Well,ain’tthat
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something,”saidStoney.“Lookatallthemfolkslinedupattheferry.Lookslikethey’rewatchingus.”
Thethrongofonlookersyelledandwaved,shoutingoutencouragement.Somecalledoutthehorsesbynameorbycolor.“I’lltakeDunny!”“Mymoney’sonFlea!”“Don’tletmedown,BigBrownie!”Theyknewthehorses.Itseemedthishadbecomearegular
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entertainmentevent.“Apparentlyafriendly
littlewager’sgoingonastowhogetsbackfirst,”saidBarleigh.
“BestbetsonmeandFlea,”Fordshoutedtotheonlookers.Hestoodupinhisstirrups,pumpinghisfistandwavinghishatintheair.Hisanticsspookedhishorse,causingittocrow-hopsideways,furtherentertainingthecrowd.
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Agentlemaninatailoredblackridingoutfitwitharedbrocadevestsatastrideafancybayroanmarethatpawedatthegroundwithimpatience.Theystoodnexttowherethethreeriderslineduptoboardtheferry.Hishand-tooledridingsaddleandmatchingbridlewithornatebrassfittings,customrevolverandholster,andknee-highblackleatherbootsallgleamed.
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Barleighgaveaslightnodinpoliteacknowledgement.“Morning,Mr.Lévesque.”
“Morning,Bar,”hesaid,touchingthebrimofhishatwithahandglovedinblackleather.“I’mputtingtwenty-fivedollarsonyouandthedunmare.I’llearnbackdoublemywagerifyouwin.”
“I’llwin,”shesaidwithamatter-of-factair.“I’ll
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beonadifferenthorse,comingback.Onesimilar,though,incolor.”
“IwastoldwhattowatchforwhenIplacedmywager.Iunderstandit’llbeanotheryellowdunorabuckskin,asimilarhorsesofolksherecancheertheirbetsastheyracebackhome.”
HesmiledandwishedherluckasBarleighurgedherhorseontotheferry.Theireyesmetforabriefmoment,
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andinthatmoment,somethingcausedherbreathtocatch.Herheartbeatfelterraticandoutofsync.
Lookingawayandstraightahead,shetriedtoconcentrateonthetaskathand.Sheranthroughinhermindifsherememberedtolowerhervoiceandspeaklikeaman.Shewonderedwhyheraisedhishandtohishatasamandoeswhengreetingalady.Hedid,didn’t
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he,orwassheconfusedandrememberingthatwrong?Hadshefailedatherdisguisebeforeevengivenachanceatsuccess?
Concentrate,Barleigh—ImeanBar.
TheferrypulledtothedockattheoppositeshoreontheKansassideoftheriver.StoneyandFordrodeaheadastheropelowered,allowingtheriderstodisembark.Barleighhesitatedandlooked
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backoverhershoulder.Themanonthebayroanhorsesatstraightandtallinthesaddle,lookingdirectlyatBarleigh.
Thesoundofhoovespoundingthegroundjoltedherbacktoreality.Shespurredherhorseandslappedthelatigohardagainstthemare’srear.Thehorseletoutasqueal,thenleaptofftheferry,landinglikeajackrabbitonhindlegs,herfrontlegspawingtheair.The
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mare’sexplosivepropulsionofftheferryalmostunseatedBarleigh,butshegrabbedahandfulofmane,pullingherselfupright,andtheygallopedoffintothesettlingdustofBigBrownieandFlea.Withinashorttime,theyclosedthegap,theracestayingneck-and-neckmostofthewaytoTroyStation.
TakingtheleadbyalengthasTroyStationcameintoview,Barleighgalloped
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intothepaddockareaandreinedtoahalt.Shedroppedtothegroundbeforethemareslidtoacompletestop.“Where’smytarget?”sheyelledtotheattendantwhograbbedthereinsofthesweaty,pantinghorse,herpistolalreadyclearingleather.
“Bull’s-eyemetalsquarenailedtothefirstwhitepost.”Hepointedatthetargettenpacestothenorth.
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Shedroppedtooneknee,aimedtherevolver,tookadeepbreath,blewitouthalfway,heldit,andsqueezedthetriggertwiceinrapidsuccession.Thedistinctivepingingofmetalonmetalfilledtheairasthebulletsmadecontact.
“Deadcenter,both,”yelledthespotterasherantothetarget.“Perfecttwenty-fivepointshots!”Theboyholdingthereinsofthefresh
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horsehandedBarleighasquareofpapermarkedwiththenumber“50”scratchedinpencilwithahurriedhand.
ShepocketedthepaperandturnedwithoutwaitingtohearStoney’sandFord’sscores.Takingthereinsofherfreshmount,alight-bonedbuckskingelding,shejumpedbackinthesaddle,gallopingawayastheattendantshouted,“Hisname’sBuckeye.Careful,he
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kicks.”Great.Firstabiter,
nowakicker.Aswiththeraceto
TroyStation,theracebacktoElwoodFerrywasaconstantshifting,maneuvering,andretakingoftheleadspot.Walkingalittle,trottingalot,andgallopingfulloutwheretheterrainallowedwasthestrategyallthreeadopted.
TrottinguptotheElwoodFerryplatform,Ford
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onhiswhitemount,Stoneyridingasmallblackmare,Barleighonthebuckskingelding,theysawaredflagwithagallopinghorseandrideremblembeinghoistedontheMissourisideoftheriver,asignalertingthetownsfolkthattheriderswereapproaching.Whattheridersdidn’tseewastheferry.
“What’shappening?Why’stheferrynothere?”Barleighaskedthedockhand
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asshesearchedupanddownthelengthoftheriver,asenseofworrycreepingin.
“Something’swrongwithherpaddlewheel.They’resendingdownarafttofetchyouback,”saidtheworker.“Lookupyonder.Hereitcomes.”
Shelookedandwasdismayed.Itwouldtaketoolongforthatslow,flat-bottomedrafttogetdownriver.Shelookedagainatthe
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distanceuptheriver,calculatedthedistanceacrosstheriver,andmadeahastydecision.
“Comeon,Buckeye,let’sgo.”Shespurredthelittlegeldingforward.Hepawedatthewaterafewtimesandsnortedatthespray,thenplungedrightin.
“Whatareyoudoing,Bar?”shoutedStoney.“Theriver’stoowidehere.It’stoodangerous.”
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“I’mnotwaiting,”sheyelledoverhershoulder.“Wecandothis,Buckeye.Easynow.”
Shetookafistfulofthehorse’smanewithonehand,heldtighttothesaddlehornwiththeother,andletthehorselurchandpaddlehiswayintothedeep,coldwater.Thehorsestruggledagainsttheswiftnessofthecurrent,andBarleighfearedthatthepairmightbeswepttoofar
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downstream.“Wellhellfire,don’t
leavemebehind.”Stoneyonhislittleblackmaretooktheplungetoo.
“Ican’tswim,forcryingoutloud.”Fordpulledhardonhisreins,tryingtorestrainthewhitemarethatseemeddesperatetojointheherdoftwoswimmingawayfromher.“Whoa,forshit’ssake.Whoanow.”
Halfwayacrossthe
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river,Stoneyandhismarewereclosingthegap.“Comeon,Blackie,swimfaster,girl.”
Theraftontheoppositeshorewaspullingawayfromthepier,oneangry,pawing,rearingwhitehorsewithitsred-facedrideraboard.Theflat-bottomedvesselflirteddangerouslyclosetocapsizingwiththehorse’soverwroughtbehavior.
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“Comeon,Buckeye.Youcandothis,”Barleighurged.Sheheldonfordearlife,thegeldinglurchingforward,hisfeetthrashinglikewildpistonsinthewater.Pullingherfeetfreefromthestirrups,drawingherkneesup,shetriedtokeepherlegsawayfromthedangerofbeingpummeledbythehorse’ssharphooves.
Nearthebank,thegentlemanonthebayroan
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marewatched,cheeringthemon.Theentireshorelinefilledwithpeopleshouting,waving,clapping,yellingoutencouragement.TheboisterouscrowdhadshifteddownstreamtowhereBuckeyeandBlackiecameoutofthewatertoraucousapplauseandshoutsof“run,pony,run!”Neckandneck,theyshotoffinaflashtowardthePonyExpressstables,drippingwetandshivering.
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Thestationmanager,AugustOlsen,waswaitingatthestableswithCOC&PPECownerWilliamWaddellasthetwogallopedtoastop.StoneyandBlackie,aneckinthelead,werethefirst,withBarleighandBuckeyeaclosesecond.ThesoundoffasthoovesstrikingthegroundtoldthatFordwasmomentsbehind.
Alargecrowdgatheredaround,pushingin
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toseethetriumphantreturnofthethreeriders.Menonhorseback,ladiescarryingparasols,childrenrunningcirclesaroundeachother,dogsnippingandbarking—allmadeforafestiveatmosphere.
“WhatinPete’snamehappenedtoyoutwo?”askedAugustOlsen.“You’reallwet.”
“Theferrywasn’tthere,”Barleighsaidthrough
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chatteringteeth.“Isentaraftforyou.
Whatinthehellhappened?Diditturnover?”HelookedatFord.“You’redry.”Augustscratchedhisbaldhead,hisfacescrunchedinaconfusedexpression.
“Didn’tcaretowaitfortheboat.Weswam.”Herbodytrembledhardwithadeepeningchill.
“Well,whyintarnationdidyoudothat?”
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TherotundWilliamWaddell,withhismouthinaperpetualfrown,waitedforananswer.
“Thesignonyourofficewall,sir,thePonyExpressmotto.‘ThemailMUSTgothrough.’IthoughtofwhatI’ddoifIwerecarryingthemailandtheferry...wasout.”Shetriedtocontrolherchatteringteethandshiveringbody.“I’dmakesure,comehellorhighwater,thatthemailwouldget
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through.”“Isthatright,son?
Why,thatimpressesmeimmeasurably,”saidWilliamWaddell,eyesbeaming.“Andyou,Mr.Wooten?Isthatwhatyouwerethinkingwhenyouswamtheriver?”
“Partly,sir,”repliedStoney,teethchattering.“Thatfive-dollargoldpiecemayhavebeenonmymind,too.”
Thecrowdroared
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withlaughterandwildapplause.
“Thatimpressesmeevenmore—anhonestanswer.”Waddell’slaughwasheartyandloud.“August,whodoyoupronouncethewinnerofourlittlerace?”
“Well,sir,itlookslikethehorsesarenoworseforthewearfortakingacoldswim.Hell,itseemsliketheyenjoyedtheplunge.Stoney
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Wootenwinsfairandsquare.”
AugusthandedthegoldcointoStoney,thenpointedatBarleigh.“Nowyoutwogetinsidetomyoffice.Bestyoustripoffthosewetclothesbeforeyoubothcatchpneumonia.I’llbringyousomehorseblanketsuntilwecanfindsomethingdrytowear.”
“Uh,sir,butI,uh...,”Barleighstammered.
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“Ijustdoubledmymoneybettingonthesetwolads,”saidthemanonthebayroanmare,easinghishorsethroughthecrowd.“TheleastIcandoispayforeachofthemahotbathoveratMissSallie’sBoardingHouse,”Mr.Lévesquesaid.
“That’smightygenerous,sir,”saidAugust.“I’msurethey’dappreciatethat.”
“Thatwasonehellof
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anexcitingfinish.Lunchisonmeforalltheridersoveratthetavern,afteryou’vedriedoff,ofcourse.I’llgosetitupwithMissSallie.”Heturnedandrodeawaybeforeanyonecouldprotest.
“Beforeyoutakeoff,wehaveanitemofbusinesstoattendto.”Mr.WaddellhandedeachridertheirownpersonalBible.“ThisBibleisthecourtesyofMr.AlexanderMajors,oneoftheother
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ownersofthecompany.Beingatemperateandreligiousman,herequiresthesameofhisemployeesandthateachofyoushallswearanoathofyourallegiance.Youallthreestandtogetherhereandraiseyourrighthand.WhenI’vereadtheoath,stateyournameandgiveyourverbalagreement.”
Thethreestoodshouldertoshoulder,BarleighandStoneyshaking
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inwetboots,Bibleinlefthands,righthandsraised,andsolemnlytooktheoathofthePonyExpress.
“WhileIamintheemploymentofMr.A.MajorsandCompany,Iagreenottouseprofanelanguage,thatIwilldrinknointoxicatingliquors,Iagreenottogamble,nottotreatanimalscruelly,and
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nottodoanythingelsethatisincompatiblewiththeconductofagentleman.Iwillneitherquarrelnorfightwithotheremployees.Iwillbefaithfulandhonestinmydutiesandwilldirectallmyactstowintheconfidenceofmyemployers.IfIviolateanyofthe
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aboveconditions,Iagreetoacceptmydischargewithoutanypayformyservices.SohelpmeGod.”Ingoodfaith,her
hearthonestandwithoutmalice,Barleightooktheoaththatsaidshewouldconductherselfasagentleman.Shedidn’tswearthatshewasagentleman.Theotherpartsoftheoathgavehernopause:
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nodrinking,gambling,cursing,orfighting;befaithfulandhonestinherduties;bekindtotheanimals.Easy.
“YouarenowallthreeofficiallyPonyExpressriders.Ford,youasanalternateandstocktender.Seemebackinmyofficeafterlunch.”Mr.Waddellshookeachrider’shand.“Congratulations.”
“Justcurious.What
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everhappenedtothefourthchapfromthismorning?”Fordasked.
“Aftertenminutesandfinallymanagingtogethisponysaddled,thatol’horsewenttobuckingandputonquiteashowofit,”Augustlaughed,slappinghisknee.“Thatboyhitthedirtsoharditrattledhisteeth.Saidthenthathe’dhadenoughofitandwasgoingbacktohisplow.”
*****
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AhotbathanddryclothesputBarleighinafinemood.Thelunch,courtesyofMr.Lévesque,wasdeliciousandmorefoodthanshe’dseensinceleavingTexas.Hungry,sheatelikeastarvingman.
Mr.LévesquekepthisattentiononStoneyandFord,hisqueriesdirectedforthemostparttowardthem.HeseldomspoketoBarleighorlookedherwayexceptforanoddquestionhereorthere.So
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manynosyquestions.Fine.Herappetitehadreturned,andallshewantedwastoeat.
Afterlunch,theshortwalkovertoPateeHousetomeetwithMr.Waddelltookmoretimethanitshouldhave.Everyonewhorecognizedthethreeriderswantedtoshaketheirhandsandoffercongratulatorypraise,aslapontheback,orawordofadvice.Oldwomen
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kissedtheircheeksandsaidquickprayersfortheirsafety.Blushingyounggirlsofferedshysmilesandbattedeyelashes,andsmudged-facedlittleboyssteppedintheshadowsoftheirbootsteps.
They’dgainednotorietyfordoingsomethingtheyalllovedtodoandwhichcameasnaturallytoeachofthemasbreathing.Ridinghorses.Ridingfast.
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“Iwaswatchingfrommywindow,”saidMr.Waddell,usheringthemintohisoffice.“You’renowcelebratedyoungridersofthePonyExpresswhomeveryonewantstotouch,hopingthatmaybejustalittleofyourderring-dowillruboffonthem.Haveaseat.Letmetellyouaboutourmailserviceandwhatyou’llbedoingtohelpensureitssuccess.”
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Takingseatsontheox-bloodleathersofaacrossfromMr.Waddell’sdesk,thethreesatandlistenedwithraptattentionasheexplainedwhattheyshouldexpect.
“Atanygiventimealongtheroute,I’veapproximatelyeightyriders.Additionally,therearemorethanfourhundredotheremployees,fromstationkeeperstostocktenderstoroutemanagers.You’llbe
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assignedtwohomestations.Homestationsareaboutseventy-fivetoahundredmilesapart.Inbetweenhomestationsareswingstationswhichareabouttentofifteenmilesapart.Howitworksisthatyou’llstartatyourfirsthomestation,racetothefirstswingstationwhereafreshmountwillawaitsaddledandreadytogo.Switchtoyourfreshmountandracetothenextswingstationandsoon
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andsoonuntilyougettoyourotherhomestation.There,you’llrestforeighthoursorlonger,dependingonwherethereturnmailis,andthenrelaythemailbacktoyourinitialhomestation.Questions?”
Fordspokeup.“HowwilltheswingstationknowI’mcomingandtohaveafreshhorseready?”
“You’llbeissuedabugle.Whenyou’renearing
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thestation,blowyourhorntoannounceyourarrival.”
“Howwillwecarrythemail?”Barleighasked,excitementgrowingattherealizationthatshe’ddoneit—shewasaPonyExpressrider.
“Wehadaspeciallydesignedleatherslingmadeforthisendeavor.It’scalleda‘mochila.’Itgoesoverthesaddle.Ithasaholeinthefrontforthesaddlehorn,and
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aslitinthebackforthecantletofitthrough.Itcaneasilyandquicklyberemovedfromonesaddle,thenthrownoverthenextinasplitsecond.Theweightoftheriderkeepsitinplace.Whichbringsmetomynextpoint,Bar.”
“Yes,sir?”“Thatsaddleyoutote
aroundneedstobestoredsomeplace.Youwon’tbeusingyourownsaddle.It’dtaketoomuchtimeto
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resaddlehorsesateachswingstation.Thehorseswillbethere,saddled,readytorun.Onlythemochilagoeswithyoufromswingstationtoswingstation.Youswingthemochilaoffyoursaddle,swingitontothefreshsaddle,thenawayyougotothenextswingstation.Gotit?”
“Yes,sir.”Shenoddedherunderstanding.
“Where’sthemail
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go?”askedStoney.“Atthecornersofthe
mochilaarefourlockedleatherboxescalled‘cantinas.’That’swherethemailgoes.Eachhomestationmanagerhasakeytoaddtoorremovemailasnecessary.Lettersarewrappedinoiledsilktopreventwaterdamage.”
“Soweridefromhomebasetohomebaseaboutahundredmilesorso
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beforechangingriders?Dayornight?”askedFord.
“Dayornight,whetherraining,snowing,orinthehighheatoftheday,themailmustgothrough.”Waddellpointedhisunlitcigartothewoodenplaqueengravedwiththecompany’smotto.
Comingaroundtositontheedgeofhisdesk,Waddelltookonaserioustoneashespoke.“One
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thousandninehundredsixty-sixmilesseparateSaintJoe,Missouri,fromSacramento,California.We’veprovenitcanbedoneintendaysorless.There’llbetoughchallengesalongtheway.Roughterrain.Inclementweather.You’llgethungry.You’llgetthirsty.You’llfaceboredom.Youmightfaceabanditortwo.We’vehadincidentswithhostileIndians.”
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Waddellpausedandlookedeachoneintheeye.“Thejobistough,butyouhavetobetougher.There’snoshameinbowingoutnowifyoudon’tthinkyou’reuptothetask.Wehavetryoutseveryotherweek.Someoneelsewillgladlytakeyoursaddleifyoudon’twanttositinit.”
“Whendowestart?”theyallseemedtoaskatonce.
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“Firstthingtomorrow.Ford,you’llbestayingheretohelpAugustOlsenwithstocktending,movinghorsesbackandforthalongtheline,breakingnewhorses,andfillinginasanalternateriderwhenweneedyou.Itpayslesssincethedanger’sless—fifteendollarsaweekplusroomandboard.Thatsitrightwithyou?”
“Thatsitsrightwithme,sir,ifIcanhaveashotat
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beingafull-timemailriderwhenaslotopensup.”Fordsaid.
Mr.Waddellnodded.“You’llbefirstinline.”
Then,“BarandStoney,weneedridersintheUtahTerritory,CarsonCityStation.IfigureifyouswimhorsesacrosstheMissouriwithouthesitation,youwon’tmindridingthemostdangerouslegoftherelay.Concerningwages,the
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averagerider’spayistwenty-fivedollarsaweekplusroomandboard.Butyou’renottheaveragerider,areyou,Bar?You’renotliketheothers.”
“Ex—excuseme,sir?”Shelookedup,eyeswide.
“WhatImeanis,riderswhotakeonbiggerrisks,forinstance,orwhoridelongerthantheirnormalshift,orwhocarryspecialmailmightgetpaidmore—
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morethantheaverage.Ithinkyoumightbeoneofthosekindofriders.”
“Yes,sir.”Sheletoutthebreathshe’dbeenholding.
Mr.Waddellhandedtheridersamapofthetrail.“LikeIsaid,weneedridersfortherelaysegmentinUtahTerritory.It’sIndianTerritory.Wehaveahardtimekeepingridersandhorsesoutthere.”
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“I’llridethewholedamned,Imeandang,routeifyouwantmeto,sir,”saidStoney.
Waddelllaughed.“Nowthat’sthespirit.You’llbecomesofamiliarwithyourownpartoftheroutethatyou’llknoweveryrock,cactus,andcreekalongtheway.Bothyouandyourponywillbeabletorideitwithyoureyesclosed,thoughIwouldn’trecommendit.
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You’lldeparttomorrowmorningtoheadforyournewhomestations.Goodluck,andGodspeed.”
UtahTerritory.IndianTerritory.TherewerealotofmilesandmountainstocrossbeforegettingtoCarsonCity.Barleigh’shandstrembledasshestudiedthemapofthetrail.
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CHAPTERTENNOVEMBER3,1860
JournalEntry:Saturdaynight.ThesunwillriseatmybacktomorrowasIheadwestintothatgapingfrontierwhichwaitsbeyondtheouterfringeofcivilization.FromstudyingthemapMr.
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Waddellgaveus,we’llfollowtheOregonTrailmostofthewayuntilitleavesusinthevicinityoftheGreatSaltLakewhereTheTrailthenclimbstoitsPacificnorth-westerndestination.StoneyandIwillpresswestward.
Mr.WaddellsaystheOregonTrail
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iswellestablishedbyfurtrappers,traders,andemigrantsthathavegonebeforeintheiroxcartsandwide-wheelwagons.Ourswingstationsandhomestationsaremarkedalongthetrailandwillbeeasytoidentify.
Tonight,myrestlessthoughtsfeelaslooselyboundas
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ourfractiouscountry.WhiletheNorthandtheSouthappearneartotearingapart,thePonyExpresschompsatthebit,eagertostitchtogethertheeasttothewest.PerhapsthisswiftmaildeliverywillholdopenthelinesofcommunicationbetweenAmerica’s
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oppositeshoresandwillserveastheinstrumentthatholdsourtenuousUniontogether.
Thisnightmaybemylastopportunityforsometimetowriteinmyjournal,asIdon’tknowwhattoexpectfromhereforwardwheneachdayisdone.Myjournalis
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theoneplacewhereBarleighcanexist.MaybeitwouldbebestifIputawaymypencils,stowedmyjournal,andkeptBarleighsafelyoutofsight.
ButIcan’tnothaveajournalwithme.Ifeelitchyevenatthethought.I’lltakeoneplusapencilortwo,
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wrappedtogether,andwillcarrythemtuckedinsidemyshirt.
TomorrowbeginsourlongtrektoCarsonCity.I’mexcited,nervous,andanxious—butatthesametime,Ifeelblankandempty.Evenlaughterandpoliteconversationhaveposeda
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challenge.Ifeellikeaforgery.Aphony.Andforgoodreason.I’mpretendingtobeaboy.AmIalsopretendingtobehuman?AhollowshellawaitingtoberefilledwithfeelingsandemotionsiswhatIam.
Longingisthesingularsentimentthatkeepsmefaintly
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tiedtomyselfwithathinthread.IremembernightsatCoffeeCreekRanch,PapaandBirdiesittinginfrontofthefire,meonthefloor,Papareadingtousfromthenewspaper.Oh,Papa…
Embersoflonging,howeverfainttheyglow,arebestkeptburied.
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Feelingssuchasthosehavethepotentialtobecomedisastrousdistractions.Icannotafforddistractions.
Imustthinkthingsthrough.Lookbeyondtheimmediate.Keeptheendgoalinsight.StayfocusedonthePonyExpressandbeingBarFlanders.
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Yettonightmymindwanders…
HughesLévesqueisahandsomeman,butthereissomethingabouthimthatseemsintense—unreal—asifhedoesn’tsharethesamefleshandbloodasothermen.He’saboveit.Heissetapart,andheknowsit,thoughhis
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unflinchingconfidencedoesn’tgivewaytohaughtyarrogance.
It’sinhiseyes.Theyknowtheworld’ssecretsyetrevealnothingoftheirown.
It’sgoodthattomorrowI’llputhimbehindme.He’llgoonabouthislife,andImine.I’llnotlivein
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dangerofhiseyesuncoveringmysecrets.
Iam,afterall,aboy.
I’mBarFlanders,ayoung,skinny,wiryfellownotovereighteen,anexpertriderwillingtoriskdeathdaily.
Anorphan.Nothingmore.
******
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Earlybeforedawn,StoneyandBarleighfilledtheirbelliesatMissSallie’sfancydiningtableatherinsistence.Atherinsistence,too,theyfilledtheirsaddlebagswithplentyofbiscuits,smokedham,venisonjerky,anddriedapplesfortheirjourney.
“Didyoufeedthoseboyswell?”Mr.Lévesquewalkedintothekitchenastheyfinishedtheirbreakfastintheotherroom.
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“Fed’emwell,Idid,”MissSalliesaidwithaheartylaugh.“Thatblond-headedStoney,Idon’trecollecteverseeingsomeonesoskinnyeatsomuch.And,I’msendingthemoffwithplentytotakewiththem,too.Stoneyandtheotherlittle’un,Bar,wholookstooyoungtoshave,areheadedtoUtahTerritorytoCarsonCity.”
Mr.Lévesquesoundedsurprised.“Carson
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City?Iassumedthey’dbeassignedthisstation.”
MissSalliecontinued.“Ford,thefreckle-facedtallone,isstayinghere.Hetookoffjustaminuteagoforthestables.Itoldhimtocomebackanytimeforavisitandahotmeal.”
“That’skindofyou,MissSallie.Well,Istoppedbytopaytheseboys’tab.HowmuchdoIoweyou?”
“Threedollarsand
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seventy-fivecents,forallthree.”
“Thereyouare.Pleasekeepthechange.Now,Ineedtopostaletterinthemail.Ifyou’llexcuseme,I’llbeonmyway.”
“Ifyou’regoing,”MissSalliesaidtothesoundofshufflingpapers,“youcanbeadearandsavemethetrip.Barleftthisletterformetomailalongwithmine.Iwasgoingtogolateron,but.
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..”“I’dbedelightedto.”
HughestookBarleigh’sletter.“Thankyouagain,MissSallie.”
Fromtheotherroom,Barleighoverheardtheconversation.ShewishedMissSalliehadn’tdonethat.Shouldtherebecausetoworry?No.SurelyMr.LévesquewouldtakethelettershewrotetoAuntWinnieandmailit,rightand
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proper,justlikeMissSalliewouldhavedone.Nocausetoworry.Timetogo.Timetoheadtothestables.TimetogetonwithbeingBarFlanders.Notimetothinkaboutthenosy,frustratingMr.HughesLévesqueanothersecond.
*****Standingintheshadeofalargeoaktreebehindthepostoffice,HughestookhisRezinBowieknifefrominsidehis
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rightbootlegandslidthegleamingtipofthebladeundertheseal,carefultoopentheenvelopewithouttearingthepaper.ItwasaddressedtoMrs.WinifredJustin,HogMountainRanch,PaloPinto,Texas.Heremovedthethinsheetofpaperandhelditbetweenthumbandfinger,broughtittohisnose,detectedafainttraceofmaplesyrup,noticedasweet,slanted,feminine
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penmanship,andsmiled.
MyDearAuntWinnie,
Missionaccomplished.I’maPonyExpressrider.I’vebeenassignedarelayrouteintheUtahTerritory.I’mtravelingwithanotherrider,StoneyWootenfromArkansas,afine
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fellowandcompanionwhotakesmeatmyword,whichmakesmefeelhorribleathavingtodeceivesuchaniceandtrustingperson.ButIhavenochoice.PleasekissStarlingandgiveDealanextra-largebunchofcarrotsforme.Ihopeyouarewell.Imissyouandthinkofyou
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everyday.YoumaywritemeincareofthePonyExpress,CarsonCityStation,UtahTerritory.Pleasedo,andtellmehowyouare,howyoursonsare,howtheranchandthecowsare.ThereisonethingImusttellyouthatIamverysorryabout.Kingranoff,frightenedbya
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badthunderandlightningstorm.Itwasourlastnightcampedonthetrail.Thingsweregoingsowelluntilthatnight.Iprayyou’llwalkoutontoyourporchonefinemorning,coffeecupinhand,andKingwillbetherestandingatyourfencegatewaitingtobeletin,having
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foundhiswayhome.Maybeone
morning,you’llfindthatI’vedonethesame.
Loveandlaughter,
Bar(leigh)
Hereplacedtheletterintotheenvelope,thentookapencilandpaperfromhissaddlebagandaddedhisownnote:
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DearestMrs.Justin,Thisis
HughesLévesquewriting.I’ve(obviously)locatedBarleigh.Shedoesn’tknowthatI’veaddedthisletterforthereasonsIsharedwithyouthedayImetyou.Thankyouagainfortrustingme,andfortellingmeof
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Barleigh’splans.Ifindhertobearemarkableandbraveyounglady,alongwithaveryfastrider—shestayedatleastaday’srideormoreaheadofmeuntilFortSmith,Arkansas.Iftherehadbeenanotherseatavailableonthestage,I’dhavetakenit,butIwasableto
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makeittoSaintJosephingoodtime.
ItelegraphedhermotherthatI’vefoundherdaughterandwhatsheisnowundertakingwiththePonyExpress.Leighselle’simmediatereplywastoaskthatIkeepaneyeonBarleighandtokeephersafe,ifthat’spossible.AsI
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feelIwasmakingapromisetoafriendwhoisonherdeathbed,it’stheleastthatIcando.Although,knowinghowdangerousthisendeavorofhersis,IamoftheopinionthatIshouldinformBarleighofhermother’spredicamentandbringBarleighbacktoSanAntonio.
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MybusinessinSt.Josephhasflexibility,sonowI’mofftoUtahTerritoryandwilldomyverybesttomakesureBar(leigh)FlandersstayssafewhileIremainintheshadows.IwillwriteagainandupdateyouonceIgettoCarsonCity.
Respectfully–HughesLévesque
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*****JournalEntry:Tuesday,November6,1860.WhiletherestofAmericavotedonournextPresident,StoneyandIdashedourponiesacrosstheplains,neveroncediscussingit.Itflatnevercrossedmymind,untilnow.FortKearneyinNebraska
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Territoryisasfaraswemusteredtoday.Onehundredmileshorsebackoverroughterrainandatfastspeedswearsonyouaftertenhours,whichishowlongittookfromSaintJosephtohere.WechangedtofreshmountsatTroy,LogChain,Seneca-Smith,Marysville,CottonwoodStation,
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RockCreekStation,Thirty-TwoMileSite,andthenrodeintoFortKearneytired,hungry,andfartooexcitedforoursoremusclestoregisteracomplaint.
WearePonyExpressriders,thefirstlegofaverylongridenowbehindus.
Wetookturnsbuglingourarrivalas
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weapproachedeachswingstation,andsureenough,freshhorsesawaitedussaddledandreadytogo.Thepreviousday’smailrunneralertedthestationmanagerstherewouldbetworidersnextcomingthrough.Wewouldhoptothegroundoffoursweaty,panting
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horses,pulloffthemochila,swingitontothesaddleofthenewmount,climbbackaboard,thenawaywewouldraceatagallop,takingadvantageofthefreshhorses’enthusiasm.
Ianticipatedprivacyissuesregardingbathroombreaks,buttoday,I
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managedtoputofftakingcareofpersonalbusinesstowhenchanginghorsesattheswingstationduringourtenminutelunchstopwhereanouthousewasavailable.
Stoneywasafflictedwithanupsetstomachmuchofthedayafterdrinkingbadwaterat
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FremontSpringsstation,andfourtimeshadtostopanddrophistrousersrightonthetrail,thediarrheahittingwithembarrassingquickness.Hisstomachlurchedandchurned;however,hemanagedtodohisthrowingupfromthesaddle,evenwhileatafullgallop.It
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troubledmethatImightbelikewiseafflictedandI’dhavetodropmytrousers.Mymindworriedoverthisforawhile,butmystomachdidn’tbetrayme.
Offtosleep.Weridefarandhardtomorrow.
*****JournalEntry:FortLaramiewasour
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intendedgoaltoday,butChimneyRockstationwasasfarasweprogressedbeforeexhaustioncalledahalttotoday’sride.Roughandundulatingterrainmadewalkingandtrottingthepracticalpaceformuchofthedistance,butwaterwasplentifulandprairiegrasswas
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abundant,sothehorsesdidn’tsufferdoingwithout,andwekeptourcanteensfull.
Swingstationsarestockedwithgrainforthehorseswhichgivesthemmoreenergythanhorsesonasimplegrass-onlydiet.Ifweencounterdangeronthetrailsuchas
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HostileIndians,ourinstructionsaretonotfightthembuttooutrunthem.Ourgrain-fedponiesarequitecapableofthat.
Themailmustgothrough,andthemailcannotgothroughiftheExpressridersarebusyengagingIndiansinashoot-out.
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Lettheponydoitsjob.LettheponyRUN.I’mquitecontenttoputspacebetweenmeandHostiles.
*****JournalEntry:Lastnightmyjournalremainedunwrittenin,fastenedunderneathmyshirtnexttomyskin.Sleepwastheonethingmy
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bodycouldmanage,anditmanagedthatfullyclothedandflat-outonapileofhayoutinthestables.Iwastooexhaustedtodragmyselffrombarntobunkhouse,satisfiedtosleepwiththehorses.
Afteratediousday’sridethatendedwithalongdescentdownasteephill,we
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rodeintoDevil’sBackboneatnearmidnight.Thejaggedandbrokenridgeofthegiantsandstoneboulderssilhouettedagainstthemoon’sglowingskylookedmuchlikeamalevolentserpent.
Wesleptforfourhours,rosebeforetheroostercrowed,andaftera
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quickcupofthickblackcoffeeandahardbiscuit,wewerebackinoursaddles,pushingnearertotheGreatBasinandfartherawayfromtheSweetwaterRiverValleywhereitjoinstheNorthPlatteRiver.
Themailwentonwithoutusasitmust,therelayrider
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assignedtothislegoftherouteracingoffwiththemochilaandintothedarknessofthenightasweslept.Ourdutycarryingthelettersisdonethusfaruntilwegettoourpermanentrelayhomestation.Ourdutynowisgettingtheresafelyandwiththesameurgencyasifwestillrodeastride
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themochila.Hundredsof
emigrantswe’vepassedalongtheOregonTrail,manycampedattheSweetwaterRiverValleywherethey’remakingtheirfinalfordacrossbeforebeginningtheirtreknorthwardtowardOregon.
StoneyandI
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keptourponiesnosespointedwest.Atday’send,wefoundthatwe’dcompletedanastoundingonehundredtwentymiles,endingupinMillersvilleSwales,oneofthehomestationsalongtheroute.Thesupperofferedwasdelicious,thebedwarm,andthestabling
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accommodationsmorethanadequate.
WeareataconfluenceofwheretheGreatPlainsmeetstheGreatBasinaswepreparetoleaveKansasTerritorybehindandenterintoUtahTerritory.I’veenjoyedseeingherdsofbuffalohereandtherealongthetrail,butdidn’tspyany
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today.Yesterday,in
theareaoftheNorthPlattRiverintheSweetwaterRiverValley,anenormousherdofbuffalograzedonthewesternsideofthePlatt.Frommyadvantageofwitnessingthescenefromadistance,itfirstappearedthatthe
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yellowprairiegrasswasdottedwithshadowsofcloudsdriftingacrosstheplains.Withasuddennessthatsurprisedme,thecloudstransformedinaninstantintogianthairybeastsstampedingacrosstheearth.Theconcussionsfromtheirflyinghooves
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shookthegroundbeneathmyhorse.
Iwonderedwhatspookedthegrazinganimalsintoafrenziedstampede,wonderedifitmighthavebeenIndiansonthehunt.Istayedjumpy,anxiousfortherestoftheday,withaheightenedawarenesstopotentialdangers.
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Whilewaterandgrasshasbeenabundantontheplains,thedangerintheGreatBasinisitsdryness.Theswingstationshavewaterbroughtinonoxcarts,butbetweenstations,theremaybelongstretcheswherecreeks,streams,andgulleyrundry.
Throughout
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theGreatBasin,therearemorerumorsofwaterthanactualwater,sowhereyoufindyourselfonthefortunatesideofarumor,thelessonistodrinkupandfillupcanteens.Thenextrumorofwatermaybefalse.
TheplainsIndianswe’veencounteredalong
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thewayhavebeenfriendly,curious,andnon-threatening,thoughwe’realwaysatthereadytospurourponiesawayfrompotentialtrouble.
ThemassacreonMay7thatWilliamsStationinNevada,wherefourstationagentsweremurdered,followedbytheMay12th
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PaiuteIndianuprisingatPyramidLake,whereseventy-sixlocalvolunteerslosttheirlivestryingtoquelltheviolence,servesasaremindertoneverletdownourguard.We’vebeenremindedoftheseincidentsbyeverymanagerorattendantateverystationwe’veriddenthrough.
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AfterthePaiuteIndianWar,mailservicewassuspendedtemporarily;however,byearlythispastJune,reportsofhostilitiesdroppedoffasmilitarypatrolsincreased,allowingthePonyExpresstorideagain.
Temperaturesaredropping.
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Winter’sfrostnowcoversthegroundeachmorning,themountainscappedinwhite.Havingonlyseenmountainsinpaintingsandinbooks,Iunderstandwhytheyinspireartistsandpoets.Majesticandformidable,yetwemustgettotheotherside.
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*****Journalentry:LeavingMillersvilleSwalesthismorningleftmeatouchmelancholy.Itfeltlikeahomeshould,warmandinviting,despitethefactthatit’salsoastagestopandaPonyExpresshomestation.Theproprietor,Mr.Holmes,readaloud
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fromtheBookofMormon,areligionwithwhichI’mnotfamiliar,andhiscomelyEnglishwifeplayedthefiddleaftersheservedourbreakfastofboiledpotatoes,slicedonions,andsconeswithjam.MissusHolmes’directpersonalityremindedmeofAuntWinnie,
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andIfeltapangofhomesickness.IthoughtofStarlingthemajorityoftheday.
Atfirst,Stoneytriedtoengagemeinconversations.Hehassincegivenintomysilences.“Iunderstanditain’tyourwaytotalkalot,”hehadsaid.“I
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don’tminddoingthetalking.Justnodatimeortwo,ifyouwill,toshowyou’restillalive.”Inodded,andhelaughed.
Ifeverpassingthiswayagain,ImustrememberCacheCave,adark,deeptunnelintherockjustbeyondthewatershedofBearRiver.It’safine
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placetoshelterawayfromthepathofwildweather,dangerousanimals,orhostileIndians.
Foratleasttwentymileswerodehuggingthebaseofatallredcliff,theareaknownasEchoCanyon.Theroadwassmooth,hardpacked,anddescendedata
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gracefulslopewhichallowedforintervalsoffull-outgallopsinterspersedwithlongtrotsandsteadywalks.Wecoveredthatgroundfast.
WearrivedatthesummitofBigMountainearlyafternoonwithanotherfifteenmilesyettogotoSaltLakeCity.Thespectacular
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viewplayeduponmysenses,thedramaticcolorsofmountain,forest,andvalleypaintedvibrantagainsttheazuresky.Thepineysmellofclean,pureairdeepinmylungs,thesofttickleofcoolwindonmyskin,theechoofwaterrushingandspillinginitsfalldownthemountain
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filledmewithjoy.Ifoundmyselfwithoutaneedforwords—therewerenoneadequateinmyvocabularytodescribethebeautybeforemyeyes.Idismounted,stoodnexttomyhorse,andstaredforagoodwhile.
AnOverlandStagewasatthat
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momentpreparingfortheseeminglyimpracticabledescentdowntheperilousslope.Thepassengers,fiveofthem,weremadetowalk.Itwouldhavebeentoodangeroustorideinsidethesliding,bouncingcoachwhichmightatanygivenmomentturnintoarun-away.
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Also,lighteningtheloadforthepoormuleteamwhichmustcontroltheStage’sdescentwastheproperthingtodo.
Thedriverrough-lockedthewheelsbyshovingalongwoodenplankbetweenleftandrightrearwheelsandleftandrightfront
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wheels,thenropingtheplankstogetherandtyingbothpiecesoffatthetongue,keepingthewheelsfromturning.Themuleshunkereddownandtuckedtheirtailstotheground,thuskeepingthecoachfromhurtlingdownthemountain.Borntothetask,thesixbig-
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bonedbeastsexecutedthemaneuverwithoutaprotestinggrunt.
Stoneyhadnoddedtowardthetravelers,hiseyesbright.“Thismomentcallsforawildspectacleofbravery.Let’sgivethesefinefolkssomethingtowritehomeabout.”Then,hepulled
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upwardonhisreins,causinghishorsetorearuplikeatrickpony.
Ifoundhisexuberancecontagious.Wewavedourhatsintheairandwhoopedlikewildbansheesaswerodeourhorsesoverthepassandstraightdownthemountain.Thepassengersofthe
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OverlandStagewhooped,too,shoutingoutwordsofappreciationtothePonyExpressriders’showofbravado.
Ienjoyedourperformance,therushdownthemountainfillingmewithasurgeofvitality.Ifelt—alive.
AfterdescendingLittle
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Mountain,steeperthanBigMountainthoughnotashigh,wechangedhorsesatEmigrationStation,andthenrodestraightintoTheGreatSaltLakeCityasthesunwaspreparingitsgracefuldescentdowntheothersideoftheearth.
TheSaltLake
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HouseisahomestationforthePonyExpress.It’salsoawonderfullyappointedhotelthatsitsrightacrossthestreetfromthepostoffice.There’salargecorraloutbackwithalongrowofstables,andnextdooristheCityBathHouseandBakery.
Wecheckedin
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withthestationmanager,MarioRusso,adarkskinned,darkeyed,miniatureItaliansportingathicktuftofsalt-and-pepperhairthatcircledthebackofhisheadfromeartoear.Hewasrelievedtoseeus,hesaid,withasincere,toothywhitesmile.Wordfromthewest
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coastwarnedofanearlywinterstormmovinginfromtheSierraNevadas.Inpreparation,hehadsenttwoofhisexperiencedridersonwestaheadofustotakethevacantpositionsatCarsonCitytowhichStoneyandIhadbeenappointed.
“Thisbeas
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farasyougo,”hesaidwithathickaccent,anexcitedwavingofhisarmspunctuatinghiswords.“Nextdooryougetyouabath,yougetyousomebreadifyou’rehungry,youdon’tpayforit,theychargeittoourtab,youthencomebackhere.I’llshowyouwhereyou
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bunkoverattheHotel.”
Idon’tknowifI’mrelievedthatSaltLakeHousewillbemyhomestationordisappointedthatI’llnotseeandexperiencemoreofthetrail.Comparedtosomeofthestationswe’veencountered,somenomorethanadug-outoraroofless
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shed,I’llbelivinginthelapofluxury,soIshouldbethankful.
I’llbetheriderwhocarriesthemailwest,ridingroughlyonehundredmileswhereI’llwaitatFishSpringstobringtheeastboundmailbacktoSaltLakeHouse.HereI’lltransfertheeastboundmailto
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Stoneywho’llrideeastbacktoMillersvilleSwaleswherehe’llhanditofftothenexteastboundrider,andthenStoneyreturnsthewestboundmailtomeatSaltLakewhereoffIgowestagaintoFishSprings.Andsoon…
StoneyandI
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eachhaveourownsmallbedssincewe’reTheRiders.TwoupperandlowerbunksaresharedinthesameroomwithtwohorsebreakersandtwobarnassistantswhosenamesI’venotyetlearned.Thisarrangementmightprovetricky,butI’mlearningthefineart
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ofsubterfuge.Thisis
“home”fornow.Goodnight.
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CHAPTERELEVENNOVEMBER13,1860
TheGreatSaltLakestretchedacrossthecold,semi-ariddeserttothenorthandwestofthecity,whiletheruggedWasatchMountainslinedthehorizontotheeast,creatingapastoralvalleyripeforgrowingcropsandcrosses.Simplewoodensymbolsmarkedthegravesofthose
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whodidn’tsurvivethewinter,orthedesert,ortheIndians,orthebirthing,ortheinfluenza.Crossessprungfromagunslinger’sbulletorakickfromanuntamedmustang—fromthedark,cold,silentloneliness—fromthemyriadwaysdeathcreptinandtookwhatitwanted.
ButcrossesdidnotadornTheTemple.
“ThosedamnedMormonspulledthecrossoff
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theBaptistchurchagainlastnight,”saidMarioRussoasheledadarkbaymareouttobesaddled.“Justbecausetheydon’tdecoratetheirbuildingsandbookswiththesymbolofthecrossdon’tmeanotherscan’t.”
“No,sir.”Barleighranahanddownthemare’sleg,concernedaboutasmallcutonthecannonbone,butpleasedthatshedetectednoheatorswelling.“Yousureit
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wasthem?”“Whoelsewouldit
be?”Marioworkedwithquick,skilledhands,completingthetaskofsaddlingandbridlingthemareinlessthanaminute.“LatestIheardtoowasthatthey’retryingtoshutdownallthenon-Mormonownedbusinesses.Youtellme,butthat’snotright.”
“No,sir.”Sheleanedherbackagainstthehorse,
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tuckingherthumbsinherpockets.“Irememberonce,backinTexas,whitesettlementswereattacked,peoplemurdered,homesburned,livestockstolen.FolksblamedIndians,becauseIndianswereknowntodothatkindofthing.Butthatonetime,itwasn’tIndians.ItwaswhiteoutlawsusingIndiansasscapegoats.Lotsofinnocentpeopledied,whitesandIndiansalike,
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becauseofthosefalseaccusations.”
“You’resayingitmightbeIndians?NottheMormons?”Marioscratchedhishead,alookofconfusioncloudinghisdarkbrowneyes.
“No,Mario.I’mjustsayingnottojumpto....Nevermind.I’llgetthismaresomewater.”
Barleighreturnedtothestallwithabucketofwaterandanappleforthe
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horseandfoundMarioperchedonthestall’shalf-wallpartition,aconcernedlookonhisface.Shefedtheappletothehorse,themarechompingthesweettreatinonebite.
“Sir?”sheasked,worried.“Youallright?”
“Yousureyou’rereadyforyourfirstmidnightrun,boy?Gottherhythmofthetraildownpat?Knowallyourmarkers?”askedMario.
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“Yessir.Iknowthetrail,”shesaidwithconfidence.
“It’sdifferentatnight.Theshadows,thesounds,thesmellschange.Youswearyou’recominguptoarightbendintheroadwhenaleftbendwillsneakupallofasuddenandthrowyousmackintoacreek.Thenight,shecanplaygameswithyou.”
“Yes,sir.”Barleighlistened,attentive.
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“Badweather’smovingin,too.You’llseesnowbeforesun-up.”
“I’mreadyforit,”shesaid,wrappingherthick,woolenscarfdoublearoundherneck,tuckingtheendsintoherwaterproof,oiledcanvassslickerthathungtoherspurs.
“Thismightnotbetheregularruno’themillcorrespondenceyou’llbecarryingtonight.Thisjust
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mightbetheruneveryone’swaitingon,theonewiththebignews.”
“Ihopeso,”shesaid.Shewasasanxioustohearthenewsaseveryoneelse.
Atthatmoment,thesoundofpoundinghoovestearingupthegroundcaughttheirattention.Lookingeast,ahorseandriderapproachedatfullgallop.Dusthungintheairbehindthemlikesepia-coloredribbonsand
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sparkledinthegoldenglowofgaslightsthatsoftenedthefrostynight.
Ayellowbandanatiedaroundtherider’sneckbillowedstraightoutbehindlikeabanner.Hisbuckskinshirtandcoatwerecoveredindust.Canvastrousersalongwiththeleathertapaderasthatattachedtothestirrupsandprotectedtherider’sfeetweresplatteredwithmud.Beadedfringethatedgedtheouter
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seamofhisgauntlet-styleCavalryglovesstuckoutlikecolorfulspikes.Awide-brimmed,Mexican-stylehatwaspulleddowntightonhishead,cinchedsnugunderhischinwithabigsilverdollarbolo.
“It’sLincoln,”heshoutedashereinedhissweatyhorsetoastop,vaultingtothegroundbeforethehorse’sfeetquitmoving.“Lincoln’sournewpresident.
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Ain’tthatsomething?”“That’ssure
something.”ShegrinnedandslappedStoneyontheback.“Soisyourfancyget-up.”
“Theridersbackeastwearthis.”
“Theydo?Alongwiththesombrero?”
“No.Thisismyspecialtouch.Icanfixyouup,ifyouwant.”
“I’llsavemymoney,thanks.”
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MarioalreadyhadthemochilapulledfromStoney’shorseandswunginplaceacrossthebaymare’ssaddleasBarleighsteppedherleftbootintothestirrupandmounted,readytorideoffintothenightwiththeimportantnewsforwhichtheWestCoasthungered.
“Don’tforget,thismare,sheishot.She’llbuck-trottillshe’sgoodandwarmedup,”Marioadvised.
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“Givehermoreslackthanyouwouldtomosthotheads.She’llcomeungluedifyougotoyankingonhermouth.Butbereadywhenyoufeelherrelax.That’showshetricksyoujustbeforesheexplodes.Youbesttobehangingonorshe’llleaveyouembarrassedandsittinginthedirt.”
Mariounderstoodahorse’spersonalityandworkethicafterspendingafew
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minutesinthesaddlewithoneandwouldgivearundownofeachhorse’speculiaritiesbeforeeachride.Theinformationwasinvaluabletotheriderswhoselifedependedontheirhorses.
Mariodouble-checkedthefiguresashemarkedthetimeofarrivalonthemochila’slog.“Stoney,ifthesefiguresareaccurateandBarandeveryoneelseondownthelinemakesastight
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ofruns,doyouknowwhatthismeans?”Hebobbedupanddownlikeapiston,tappinghispencilagainsttheledgerinanexcitedstaccatorhythmbeforereplacingthetimelogintooneofthefourcantinasonthemochilaandlockingit.
“AllIknow,sir,isthatIthinktheseponiesknowsomethingspecial’shappeningtonight.It’sliketheyallsproutedapairof
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wings.EverytimeIthinkoneof’emdon’thavenothingleft,Ijustaskforalittlebitmore,justalittle,andtheygivemorethanIaskfor.IreckonitmeansCalifornia’sgonnagetthisnewsprettydarnquick.”
“Prettydarnquick?Asquickasstinkinashitstorm.NewsofthiselectioncouldmakeittoCaliforniainrecordtime.”
“We’resettinga
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record.Well,ain’tthatsomething?”StoneypunchedhisfistagainstBarleigh’sthigh,hiseyesaswideassilverdollars.“That’ssomecrazyfastriding.”
“Fast,yes,”saidMario.“Andyoucould’vedoneyourrunalittlefasterifyouhadn’thadallthatwind-dragfromthatgoddamnedhat.Where’dyougetthatthing,offadeadMexican?”
“Ipaidgoodmoney
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forthishat.Itcostmetwodollars,includingthesilverconcho.”Stoneyloosenedtheboloandliftedthelarge,yellowsombrerofromhishead,swattingthedustfromhisprize.Histhin,blondhairstayedplasteredtohisheadwithsweatandgrime.
“Well,thatwasfourquarterstoomuch.Youshouldhavesavedthemforabath.”
“Abath’sanickel,”
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saidStoney,soundingdefensive.
“Yep,andatonebathaSaturday,Iwouldn’thavetosmellyourstinkingassforagoodgoddamnedfortyweeks,longerthanthathat’sgoingtolast.Nowgetsomerest.Yourideagaintomorrow.”
“It’safinehat.Ilikemyhat.”
“Getsomerest.”“Yes,sir.”
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“Andyou,Bar,yougetoutofhere.”
“Yes,sir.”“AbrahamLincoln!”
Barleighshouted,thethrilloftheelectionnewssendinganexcitingcurrentthroughherbody.Shereinedhermarearound,gallopingdownthedustyroadtowardMillCreekCrossing,thefirstoftenswingstations.Throughoutthenight,shewouldchangetofreshhorsesateachstation
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beforeendingherrelay115mileswestandtenhourslateratFishSpringsSite,pushingherselfandallelevenhorsestothelimit.
AsSaltLakeCitygrewsmallerbehindher,lightsbegantoglowinwindows.PeoplegatheredonporchesandoutinthestreetsasnewsoftheelectionwasshoutedfromneighbortoneighborandwordspreadacrosstheGreatSaltLake
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CitythatAbrahamLincolnhadwontheelection.Manystayedupallnightincelebration,yettherewereplentyotherswhosnuffedouttheirgaslamps,closingtheirdoorstothenews.
*****Afreshhorsestoodsaddled,bridled,andreadytoreceivethemochilaasBarleighgallopedintoeachswingstation.Rarewasthemountsheconsideredgentleand
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wellbroke.Mostwerewoolychargesfreshofftherange,somehavingbeenhandledjustenoughtomakethemcurious,othershavingbeenhandledjustenoughtomakethemcantankerous.
ThehorsesbackeastalongtheSaintJoelinetendedtowardtheKentuckyThoroughbredandMorgantypes,finerandpurerintheirpedigrees.Furtherwest,thehorsesontheExpressstring
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wererangier,moretheCaliforniamustangtype,hardier,smaller,andmeaner.
OncebeyondSaltLakeCity,shespurredhardforMillCreekCrossing,thefirstoftheswingstations.Shelaylowonthebaymare’sneckandletherhaveherhead,stayingoutofhermouthasMarioinstructed.
Thenightwasasblackastarpitchexceptforwhenlightningpuncturedthe
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darknesswithitssharpflashes.Themoonandthestarshidthemselvesbehindthickstormclouds,thesmellofcoldrainhangingheavyinthedustynightair.
Barleighusedflashesoflightningtonavigatefromstonetostone,fromonetrailmarkertothenext.SheknewMillCreekwoundthroughtheflatsnearbyandofftoherright,butcouldnotseeit,thenightwassodark.
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Asthestormfrontpassedoverhead,rollingacrossthevalley,thunderechoedthroughoutthecanyonandintenselightningdancedoffthejaggedgranitewalls.Wellafterdarknesshaddescended,temperaturesplummetedandaconfusedconcoctionofrain,sleet,andsnowbegantopelttheearth.
Thoughridingblindthroughtheblackness,impossibletoseethetrail,she
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couldyethearherhorse’shoovesstrikingthehard-packedwagonroad.Thisassurancetoldherthatallwaswell,allowinghertheconfidencetocontinueaskingthemaretogiveitherall.Themarecomplied.
Barleighknewthattheswingstationlayjustbeyondtheplankbridgethatspannedthecreek,andthedullclatteringofhoovesonwoodenplankswasareliefto
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Barleigh’sears.Sherelaxed,knowingwhereshewas,despitetheblacknessofthenight.
Halfwayoverthebridge,lightningstreakedacrossthesky,illuminatinginawhite-hotflashthemuddybanksofthecreek.Thesuddenbrightnesssilhouettedtwoloomingfiguresonhorsebacklettingtheirhorsesdrinkwateratthestream.
Indians.
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Sheshrieked.Inapanic,Barleighyankedtoohardonthereins,whichcausedtheironbittodiglikeasharpknifeagainstthehorse’ssensitivemouth.Thesudden,intensepainsentthemareintoahigh-headed,side-steppingprancerightoffthesideofthebridgeandintothefreezingcreekafewfeetbelow.
ThetwoIndiansdisappearedintothedarkness.
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FearwasthetightgluethatkeptBarleigh’sseatfromseparatingfromthesaddle.Themaresplashedandcrow-hoppedoutoftheshallowwater,Barleighclingingtightlytothesaddlehornwithbothhands,thereinslostandhanginguselesslyattheground.Theysplasheduptheslipperybankandwerebackontheroadinaninstant,themaregrowingmoreenthusiasticinher
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buckingthenearertheydrewtoMillCreekCrossing.Alanterngaveawarm,glowingwelcomeinthewindowofthestablesjustupthehill.
Shedidn’tdareletgoofthesaddlehorntoreachforthebugle.Instead,sheyelled.“Franks!Helpmestopthisdamnhorse.”Sheyelledagain,louder.“Franks,grabthereins.”
“Whatinthehellhavewegothere?”askedthe
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stationmasterashegrabbedforthebuckinghorse,throwinghisweightagainstthemare’sshoulderandeasinghertoastop.“Whyinthehellareyouandyourhorsedrenched,boy?You’llcatchyourdeath.”
“Indiansatthecreekspookedme.Isawtwo,maybemore.Wejumpedoffthebridge.”
“Jumpedoffthebridge?Whyinthehelldid
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yougoanddoathinglikethat?”
“Ididn’tmeanto.Itwasanaccident.”
“Indians?Ain’tbeenIndiansthiscloseinsometime.Yousureaboutthat,Bar?”
“IsawwhatIsaw.”Sheremovedthewetmochilafromthesaddle,threwitacrossthebackofthewaitingblackmustang,andremounted.“Lincolnwonthe
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election.”“Don’tyouwantsome
hotcoffee?Aquickcuptowarmyou?”
“Nocoffee.YougotadryblanketorsomethingIcanwrapupin?”Barleighasked,achillsettingin.
“Here.Takemyslicker,”saidFranks,removingthecoatfromhisback.“It’llswalleryouup,butthat’llbeallright.I’llhaveyoursdriedoutwhen
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yougetback.”LeavingMillCreek,
theterritorywasharsh,thedesertvalleyscatteredwithsagebrush,greasewood,andthebleachedcarcassesofoxenandcattle.Saltydusthungintheair,thirstyfortherainorsnowthatwouldturnitintoanoozymud.
Throughoutthestormynight,Barleighracedfromstationtostation,buglingherarrival,shouting
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thenewsoftheelection.Shedismounted,mounted,andracedforthenextstation,takingnobreaksforcoffee,water,orpersonalcomfortorhygiene.Noliquidin—noliquidout.Arecord-breakingridewasatstake.
TheExpressCompanyplannedandbuiltswingstationsalongtheroutewherenaturalspringswerelocatedtoprovideasourceofwaterforthestockandforthe
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peoplemanagingthestock.IntheGreatBasin,goodwaterwasdifficulttofind,andthewateratSimpson’sSprings,theseventhswingstationalongherroute,hadlongbeenusedbylocalIndians.Thiswasherleastfavoritestation,theoneshehurriedthroughthefastestwiththechangingofthemochila.
Awaterygraydawnoflightandmisttoldthatnightwasover.Themorning
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wassteelyanddampanddullandcold,butatleastitwasnolongerdark.ThemountainpeaksatherbackwereallbutinvisibleinashroudofsinkingcloudsasshereinedtoastopatSimpson’sSprings.
“Morning,Whizzer.”Barleighleapttotheground,pullingthemochilaoffandflingingitacrossthesaddleofthefreshmountthatstoodstompingatthehitchingpost.
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“Lincolnwins.”Remounting,she
gallopedoffbeforethenewssettledonhisears,quicktoputasmuchdistancebetweenherselfandtheIndianswhomshefeltcertainhidineveryshadow,ineverydipandhollow,behindeverystone,behindeverybladeofgrassinandaroundSimpson’sSprings.Shewantedthisplacebehindher,racingnowforherwesternhomestation,
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FishSpringsSite,ahardforty-twomilesridefurtherintoUtahTerritory.
“Hey!Wegotboiledwolfmuttonandryesoup,andplentyofcoffee,”Whizzercalledtoherdisappearingback.“What’sthehurry?Oh.Lincoln,eh?”
Fromthere,shechangedhorsesatthehauntedRiverbedStation.Otherriderstoldfrighteningtalesofthisplace,ofhowtheyspurred
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fastthroughtheghostlyflatterrain.She’dneverfeltorseenonewithherowneyes,butothersinsistedthatthecanyonswarmedonstormynightswithdesertfairieswhoteasedhorsesintospookyantics,whohowledatloneriders,whosnatchedattheirshirtcollarsandtwistedjealousfingersintheirhair.
Sheremountedontofreshhorsestwicemore,firstatDugwaySiteandthenat
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BlackRockSite,beforeatlastgallopingintoFishSpringsSitejustshyofeleveno’clockinthemorning.Withherfirstovernighterbehindher,Barleighwaselatedtoseeherwesternhomestation.
Asoftsnowbegantofall,siftingafinepowderoverthethatchedroofofthelow-slungrockbuilding,wherearoaringfireblazedinthewidehearth.Graysmoke
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curledinathinribbonoutofthecrookedstonechimney,disappearingamongthelowcloudsthatthreatenedheaviersnow.
Herbuttcheekswererawandfeltasiftheymustbebleeding.Ridingallnightinwetclothesthatfreezetoyourskinwilldothat.Cravingcoffee,wantingwarm,dryclothesandsleep,sheknewthatwalkingwasgoingtohurt.Shebracedherselffor
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theexpectedpain.“Hello,Mr.Barth.
AbrahamLincolnwontheelection.”Sheslidfromherhorse,tooexhaustedtohelpremovethemochila.
Yes.Walking.Hurts.“Mr.Lincoln,eh?
Well,don’tknowifI’msurprisedornot.IreckonthoseMormonswillbegladtoseethelastofBuchanan,eh?Allthetroublehe’scaused’em?”
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“Ireckon.So,where’sEckels?”Herreliefriderwasknowntobepunctual,alwaysonthespot,horseinhand,readytotakeovertherelay.
“Eckelsain’tmadeitbackyet.Hemustbecaughtupinthestormthat’sgottheSierraNevadasallsnaggedup.”
“WhataboutThomason?”
“Indiansscaredhimoff.LastweekbackatBlack
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RockSite,hewasambushedbyapasselofthem.Theyshotabunchofarrows,evenafewstraybulletsathim.Thomasonoutranthem,butitscaredhimbadenoughnottowanttocomeback.”
Barleighshivered.“Ijustpassedthroughthere.So,whatdowedo?Wecan’tletthemochilastop.Ithastokeepmoving.”
“Thenyouhavetokeeponriding,boy.You’re
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allwegotrightnow.Canyoudoit?”
“Yes,sir.Icandoit.”She’dgivenheroath.Themailmustgothrough.Thethoughtoflettingitstoponherridewasunthinkable.
“Itpaysmoremoney,youridingextra,”Mr.Barthsaid.
“Thatpartsnice,butthisistheelectionresults.Ithastokeepgoing.”Barleighfeltasenseofobligation,of
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duty.“Howlongyou
alreadybeeninthesaddle,son?”
“Sincemidnight.”“Thesnowwillbe
pickingup—Idon’tknow.Don’tseemsafe,younotknowingthislegoftherouteandall.”Mr.Barthshovedhisglovedhandsintohiscoatpockets,hisbreathhoveringinafrozencloudinfrontofhisdrawn,thinface.
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“Icandoit,Mr.Barth.Iwanttoride.”Shestoodhergroundagainstthestationmasteranddidn’tbackdown.
“Getsomecoffee.Fillyourcanteen.There’shardbiscuitsonthestovetofillyourpockets.Takemyserapetothrowoveryourslicker.Getsomedrygloves,too,fromthebunkhouse.”
“Yes,sir.WheredoIgofromhere?”
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“Boyd’sStation,duewest.Theroadstayshard-packedifyoukeepclosetothebluff.Don’tstrayfarofforyou’llendupintheswampymirethat’sworsethanquicksandandbogdownyourhorse.Theonlywayoutofthatmessisabullet.”
Barleighnoddedherunderstanding.
“Boyd’sStationisasmallstonehousewithgunports.They’retherefora
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reason.Ifyou’reluckyyou’llpassEckelsontheway.Ifnot,thenkeeponridingwestasfarasyoucanwithoutkillingyourselforyourhorse.Thesunwillbewithyouunlessthesecloudsregroup,whichitlookslikethey’redoing.Youbestmakegooduseofyourtime,andkeepaneyeoutforEckels.”
Shedidn’tpassEckelsonherwaytoBoyd’sStation.Theroadwasflatandfastand
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shetriedoutrunningthelowering,thickeningsnowclouds.Lightflurrieschangedtofat,wetflakes,whichturnedtoaswirlingwhiteoutassherodeintoBoyd’sStation.
Thereshechangedhorsesandkeptonriding,thelonestocktenderaskinny,apprehensive-eyedboyoftwelve,pointinghertothenextswingstation,WillowSprings.
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Theboy,EnnisJulesburg,anorphantakeninbythestationmanager,hadbeenfrightenedbytheworseningblizzard.Hehadbroughtallsixhorsesupfromthecorralandhadledthemintotheboardinghouse,wheretheywereallmillingaboutthesparselyfurnishedcottage.
“TheyallrunoffoncebeforewhenInjunsattacked,”heexplainedwithwideeyes
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asBarleighthrewthemochilaoverthesaddleofadappledgraymarethatstoodmunchingfromapileofsweetoatsonthefloorinfrontofthehearth.
“Idon’twanttogooutinthisstormandhavetochasethemdown,”saidEnnis.“WhatifIcouldn’tfindthem?Imightgetlostandmightnotbeabletofindmywayback.ThenImightfreezetodeathandnoone
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wouldknowwheretofindmydeadbody.”
“Butitstinksinhere.”Barleighkickedatapileofmanure.“Howcanyousleeporbreathewiththewindowsclosed,thesmokefromthefireplacesothick,andallthishorseshitalloverthefloor?”
“Livingwiththestinkisbetterthandyinginthesnow,”saidaveryseriousEnnis.
Windblewthesnow
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intodeepeningdrifts,thetrailbecominghardertodefine.Barleigh’sponyleanedintothebitingwind,herthickwhiskerscoatedwithicicles.Barleighshiveredundertheserape—shetriedtosipfromthecanteen,butherhandsshook,splashingcoffeeoverherchin.Shepulledthescarfupanditfrozetoherskin.
Shetalkedtoherhorse,keepinguparunningdialoguetopasstimeasshe
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lookedforsignsalongthetrailthatmightindicatethatshewasattheveryleaststillonthecorrectpath.Agoodguesswasallshecouldofferherselfattimes.Theirpaceslowedtoasafewalk.Sometimesitslowedtoasaferstandstillwhileshereorientedherselfintheblindingsnow.Themidafternoonsunwasuselessagainstthethickclouds,offeringnohelpinfindingthe
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route.Onemoment,she
thoughtshefoundtheroad.Thenext,itdisappearedunderafootofpowder.Findingaplacethatwasflatterandwiderandthencurveddownintoagulley,shecautiouslypickedherwaythroughthesnow,followingittowhereveritled.
Twicemorelosingthetrail,shedismounted,circledback,keepingalowandclose
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eyeonthehoofprintsbeforethefast-fallingsnowerasedthemfromview.Theprintsledherbacktowhatshefeltsuretobethetrail.Stillonfoot,sheledthewearyhorsethroughasteep-slopinggulley,wherethewindblewthedriftsintowaist-deepheapsbeforetheycameuptheotherside.
“Comeon,Blaze,don’tgiveup.”Barleighpulledonthereinsandtried
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tocoaxtheexhaustedanimaltokeepmoving.
Thehorseploddedupthesteepslope,herfeetfallingheavyoneatatime.Fatigueandbrutalcoldsappedherstrength.Hersidesheavedwitheachlaboredbreath,andeachone,Barleighfeared,mightbethemare’slast.
Allofasudden,withnowarning,thegalestopped.Itwasasifagiantfist
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punchedoutthewind’sbreath.Thesnow,oncethrashinginahorizontalblizzard,nowbegantofloatinasilent,spiralingsway.Disorientedandsnow-blind,Barleighfellheadfirstoveracedar-stavehitchingpostallbutburiedinthesnow.
Afaintlightflickeredwithapaleyellowglowinthewindowofasmallstonelodgejustafewyardsfurthertothewest.Theoakysmellof
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awoodfirescentedtheair.AhorsenickeredagreetingtoBlaze—sheofferedagruntingnickerinreturn.Afrontdooropened.Steamingblackcoffeeinathintincupappeared.GlovedhandstookthereinsfromBarleigh’sfrozenfingersandledherhorseaway.Another’shandspressedagainsthershouldersandsteeredherintoaglowing,warm,opendoor.
“MyGod,we’rehere,
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Blaze.WillowSprings.Wealmostroderightbyit.”Barleighfoughtoffatear.
“Blazewastakentothebarn,ifthat’sthehorse,”saidFrenchieJones,thestationmanager.
“Where’sthemochila?”Barleighaskedthroughchatteringteeth,herbodyshakingsohardthatmostofthecoffeespilledoutofthecupandontothefloor.“It’sLincoln.Lincolnwon
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theelection.Ican’tstop.Havetokeepriding.Keepthemailgoing.”
“It’sallright,son,”saidFrenchie.“ThatwasEckelswhotookthemochilafromyou.Hegotherethismorningbutthestormkepthimfromgoinganyfurther.He’srestedupenoughtotakeitonwestforyou.Yourmochila’singoodhands.AndLouisShoalsleftnottenminutesagowiththe
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eastboundmail.Younodoubtpassedhim.”
“IfIdid,Ididn’tseehim.Hell,Ialmostdidn’tseethisplaceuntilthewindjust...”Shetriedtosnapherfingersbutherfrozenjointswouldn’tcooperate.“Thewindjuststopped,justlikethat.”Takinganothersipofcoffee,eatingaspoonfuloflambstew,Barleighthencrawledoverbythefire.Curlingupinaball,sheslept
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fortwelvehoursstraight,herclothsthawinganddryingbymorning.
*****ThesunwaswellestablishedovertheeasternridgewhenBarleighawoketoraw,blisteredskinfromridingallnightandmostofthedayinwet,frozenpants.Chaffedskinmadewalkingtothecoffeepotachallenge,butdeterminationandwantprevailed.
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“Here,son,”saidFrenchie,“smearthisalloveryourlegsandbetweenyourbuttcheeks.It’lltakeacoupleaweeksbeforeyoutoughenupdownthereandgetusedtotheconstantwearandtear.”
“Thanks,Frenchie,”shesaid.“Whatisit?”
“Lard.AndincaseCookierunsoutoffryingoil,justscrapeitoffwhenyou’redoneridingandgiveitbacktohim,niceandseasoned,
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justthewayhelikesit.”Frenchiewalkedoutofthekitchendoubledoverlaughing,nodoubt,atthelookonBarleigh’sface.
HewasstilllaughingwhenBarleighmetupwithhimatthestables.Sheselectedaneasy-temperedlookinggeldingandsaddledup,gettinghermindreadyforwhatsheexpectedwouldbeanarduousridehome.Feelingasgreasedupasa
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holidayduck,sherodeawayataneasytrot,buttoutofthesaddlewithherweightinthestirrups,determinednottocry.
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CHAPTERTWELVE
NOVEMBER15,1860
Journalentry:IreturnedtotheGreatSaltLakeCitylateintheafternoonwiththeeastboundmochilaandpasseditofftoStoneywhowaitedatthestables,
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horseinhand,asIknewhewouldwhenIbeganbuglingmywayintotown.
Hesportedanewbrownhat.Itwascinchedtightunderhischinwithabraided,leathercord,thehatsmallerbrimmed,shortercrowned,andmoresuitedtofasterriding.
Hestillhad
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hissombrero,hehadshoutedtomeoverhisshoulderashegallopedaway.HeaskedmetokeepaneyeonhisyellowMexicanhatandtonotletMariothrowitawaylikehethreatenedtodo.
IpromisedhimIwould,laughing,asStoneyandMariothrew
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obscenegesturesatoneanotherbeforeStoney’shorseracedoutofsite.
Myintentionofbathingandwashingthelardoffmybodywassincere,butonceIsawmybed,myintentioncrumbled.Ifellasleepbeforemyheadmadecontactwiththepillow.
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Exhaustionmusthavedeadenedthesenseofsmell.IfounditremarkablethatIsleptwithoutmyownodorwakingme.It’sagoodthingalltheotherridersfoundreasonstobeawayforthenight.
Afterwakingfromthesleepoftheinnocentorofthedead,Ididtakea
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bathandnoticedthatmyskinfeltsoftandsupplewhereitwasn’tblisteredandchapped.LardmaynotbewhatthefancyladiespurchasefortheirdaintyskinatLeonard’sDepartmentStorebackinFortWorth,butitworkedwondersformychaffedbehind.
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Wearinesskeptmefromridingouttodaytothehotsprings.IwasafraidI’dfallasleeponcethereandendupdrowningmyself.Apparently,death’snotagoodexcusefornotsettlingyourtaxdebtwiththebank.
AfterlunchIstrolledaroundtownandmademywayto
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themercantile.IthoughtI’dbuytobacco.Iwouldn’tuseit,butitfitmypublicpersonality,tocarryapouchofSnuff’schewingtobaccoinmypocketlikeaman.Honingmymalepersonatookpracticeandobservationeverymomentofeveryday.
Atthetobacco
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counteratthefarendofthestorestoodamanwhoboreastrikingresemblancetoHughesLévesque,thegentlemanfromSaintJoseph.Iwatchedashefinalizedhistransaction,andthenheturnedandexitedoutthesidedoor.
Isawhimforabriefmomentand
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fromadistance,butthelikenessmademepause,stare,andforgetmyownpurchase,mypocketremainingtobacco-less.
Idon’tknowwhy,butmyheartskippedabeat.Ortwo.Itcouldn’tbehim.WhatintheworldwouldhebedoinghereinSalt
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LakeCity?IthoughthesaidhewasfromTexas.SanAntonio?IrememberhewaswritingtoafriendaboutthePonyExpressandhehadlotsofquestionshedidn’tmindasking.
Washisfriendaladyfriend?Don’tbesilly.Whatdoesitmatteranyway?
Whatmatters
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isthisyawningtirednessthat’swashedoverme,atirednesslikeI’veneverfeltbefore,yetitrewardsmeinwaysIcan’tdescribe.I’veearnedthisexhaustion.Adeepsleepwillbemyimmediaterewardtonight. Tomorrow,I’llgotothehotsprings
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andenjoyawarmsoakingbathinthemineralspa.I’lltakealongsomefinesoapsandoils,andifforabriefhourortwo,I’llremindmyselfthatIusedtonotsmelllikeafilthyBillygoat.
Goodnight.*****
“Don’tsoaktoolonginthosehotsprings,”saidMarioasheforkedathicksliceofham
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drippingwithrunnyeggyolkintohismouth.“Iheardthosemineralswillshrivelupyourpeckertosmallerthanyourlittlefinger.Course,I’veseenyouinyourlongjohns.Youdon’thavemuchthereanyway.”
Barleighshovedhermiddlefingerintheairlikeshe’dseenStoneydo,thenwalkedoutthedoortothelaughterofMarioandtheotherriderswhohadreturned
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atdawnfromanightofdrinkingandcardplaying.Shereadjustedherimaginaryprivatesandspatontheground.
“Youbastardscangotohell.”Shetriednottothinkofwhatherpapawouldsayifheheardhertalkinglikethat.
“Carefulyoudon’twakeupahibernatingbearinoneofthemcaves,”shoutedBigBrody,thepart-timeriderwhenhewassoberenoughto
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sitinasaddle.“Orsurpriseabandofoutlawsstowingawaytheirloot.Theyhideoutinthemcaves,too,youknow.”
Sheignoredthejokesandkeptwalking,givinganotherreadjustingscratchandasidewaysspitforgoodmeasure.
Therewerefourmineralbathsclosetotown.Thenearestandlargestwaspatronizedbytouristsand
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high-payingguests.Nottoofarawaywerethedeepestandhottest,whichwerefavoredbythelocals.Emigrantsandvagrantspitchedtheirtentsandcampedaroundthefurthestandmostsulfuric.
Thefourth,whichwashiddenawayandknowntoonlyafewlocals,wasinasecretlocation.Downasteeppathandtuckedawayinthebellyofacave,itsentrancewascamouflagedbygiant
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boulderscoveringthegapingmouth.MariosharedthissecretwiththePonyExpressriderstouseontheirdaysoff.
Barleighguidedthehigh-steppingchestnutgeldingdownthesnow-packedlanepastthemercantile.Shecastasidelongglanceinthewindowassherodeby,wonderingifthegentlemanatthetobaccocountermightmakeanotherappearance.
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Afterasecondglance,shechidedherselfforentertainingdangerousthoughts.
Aneasyhour’srideoutsideofthebusycityfoundheratthesecretcut-offforthesprings.Thetrailwasempty,withBarleightheloneriderdespitethenicebreakintheweather.Snowcoveredtheground,butthesunglowedinaclearbluesky,andthewindseemedcontentatasoftbreeze.
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Leavingthemaintrailandheadingsouthwherethethreestackedstonesmarkedtheway,thesecretpathbecamenarrowandsteep.Barleighdismounted,leadingthehorsefurtherdownuntilcomingtoalargepinetreegrowinginasmall,flatgladehiddenbehindastandofmountainredcedars.Shetiedthehorseandremovedhersaddlebag,givingthegeldingapieceofpeppermintanda
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patontheneck.Slippingandsliding
furtherdownthenarrow,precipitousgrade,Barleighfinallycametoaclusterofmassivegranitebouldersthattheearthlongagoshooktogethertoformalow,taperedopeningintothehiddencave.
Inside,sheheardthehollowechoofwaterdripping.Atingeofsulfurcausedhertosniffand
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wrinklehernose.Throughajaggedcrevasseoverhead,anarrowbeamofsunlightfilteredintothecave.Itcastthesemi-darksceneofsteamrisingabovealanguidpool,thelushgreenfernsgrowinginrandomtuftsalongtheslick,wetgranitewallsintoanetherealoasisofbeauty.
Throwinghersaddlebagstotheside,shehearditslidetoastopagainstthecave’swall.Shefelther
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waywithherhandsandfeet,movingwithcautionuntilhereyesadjustedtothenear-darkness.Sheproppedhershotgunbetweenthebagandthewall,herpistolswithineasyreachofthepool’sledge.
Bootsandsockswereshed.Shecrepttothewater’sedge,easingherfeetintothesteamingpool,quicktoyankthemout.
“Ouch!”Shelistened
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totheechoofhervoice,asurprisedsmileonherface.
“Ouch!”shehollered,louder,laughingatthesoundofhervoicedisappearingintothebellyofthecave.
Removingherclothes,shelaidthemnexttothepoolforwashing,thenlaidouthercleanclothesontopofhersaddlebag,keepingthemoffthedampfloortostaydry.Thenbegantheslowprocessofunbindingherbreastsfrom
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thetightswaddlingclothAuntWinniehadgivenherandshownherhowtowrapherselfinordertoflattenhercurves.
“Ahh.”Barleighbreathedinadeep,satisfyingbreath,rubbingherselfwithbriskhandstogetthecirculationgoing.“Thatfeelsgood.”
Fillingherlungswithdeepbreathsagainandagain,shelanguishedinthe
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unrestrainedfreedomofanunboundwoman.Frominsidethesaddlebags,sheremovedasofttowel,lavenderbathsalts,lilacshampooflakes,andoiloflilacshe’dborrowedfromtheBathandBakery,placingthejarsonthetowelnexttothewater’sedge.Herpicnicconsistedofasmallflaskofwateredbrandyandapouchofdriedapricotsandwalnuts.
Holdingherbreath,
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sheeasedintothesteamingpool,takingaseatontheslopingstoneledgeafewfeetbelowthewater’ssurface,thesteamywaterfeelingmuchlesshotthemoreshebecameaccustomedtoit.
Afterscrubbingherskin,washingandoilingherhair,thenpoundingandsoakingthedirtoutofherclothes,shesatuptoherneckinthemineralpool.Sippingbrandyandeatingwalnuts
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andapricots,shetriedtothinkofwhattodonextbesidesjustsitandenjoythesimplepleasureofsmellinglikeawomanagain.
Asthesunchangedpositionoverhead,thelightenteringthecavethroughthecrevasseglitteredandsparkledoffthecrystalquartzinthewetgranite,appearinglikepink,black,andwhitediamondsembeddedinthecave’swalls.
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Barleighclimbedoutofthepoolandcrepttothefarside,runningherhandalongthewarmsurfaceofthesparklingwall.Theideaofexploringfurtherintothedepthsofthecavernpiquedhercuriosity,asshewonderedhowfarbackitmightgo.
Uh...?Shedrewaquickbreath.Whatwasthat?Sheremainedstill,holdingherbreath,tryingtodiscernif
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thenoisesheheardcamefromwithinthecaveorfromoutside.
Pressingherbackagainstthewall,sheinchedclosertowheresherememberedthrowinghersaddlebagandplacingtheshotgunnexttoit.Shemovedwithslow,quiet,deliberatemovements,stretchingherarm,reachingoutherhand,extendingherfingersasfarastheywouldgo.Shetouched
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warmmetal,wrappedherfingersaroundit,butthebarrelwasslickfromthehumidityofthecaveandslippedfromhergrasp,clatteringtotherockyfloor.
Shit!Droppingtoallfours,
shecrouchedontheground.Then,reachingforthegunandcrookingitinonearm,shecrawledtothewater,slippingintothehotbath.Likeasilentsnake,she
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floatedtotheoppositeside,theguninherhandsandhereyesgrazingjustabovethewater’ssurface.Shesatperchedonthesubmergedledgewitheyesandnoseinchesabovethewaterline,thebarrelofthegunrestingontheedgeofthepool,herfingeronthetrigger,waiting,watching,listening.
Howlongmustshestaysubmerged?Shefeltlikeshewasturningintoaboiled
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prune.Maybetherewasnothing—shejustthoughtsheheardsomething.Shewasbeingjumpy.Tenminutesmusthavepassed.Shewouldwaitfivemore,thengetdressedandgetthehelloutofthewater,leavethecave,andgetbacktotown.
Takingadeepbreath,sheeasedoutofthepool,gatheringupthetowel,wetcleanclothes,thejarsofsoapandshampoo,herpistols,and
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shotgun,andthencarriedherbelongingstothesaddlebaglayingagainstthesidewall.Shebeganrepackingeverythingforthetripbackupthetrail,whereshe’dlefthergeldingtiednottoofaraway.
Theswaddlingclothlayingontopoftheclean,dryclothes,thebindingthatwouldturnBarleighbackintotheboyBarFlanders,wouldgoonfirst.Shebeganthe
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wrappingprocess,butstopped.Thefeelingthatshewasmissingorforgettingsomethingtoyedwithhermind.
Ah,yes.Sheputdownthe
swaddlingclothandfeltherwaybacktothewater’sedgetoretrieveMario’sbrandyflaskthathe’dloanedher.Barleighhadswornanoathtoguarditwithherlife.Asshereachedfortheflask,the
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quietdarknesswaspiercedbythesoundofahorse’swhinnyveryclosetotheentrance,thenoisereverberatingandechoingdeepintothecave.
ThesuddenandloudwhinnystartledBarleigh,stoppingherinhertracks.
“Pardonme,ma’am,butisn’titunsafeforawomantobathewayouthere,allbyherself?”Theman’svoicewassmoothanddeep.
Leapingintothepool,
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Barleighpressedflatagainsttheledgeshe’dhadbeensittingonearlier.She’dheardthatvoicebefore.ItsoundedlikeMr.Lévesque,thenosymanfromSaintJoe.Maybeithadbeenhimpurchasingtobaccointhemercantile.
“Haveyoudrowned?Areyouallright?”thedeepvoiceasked.
“Ihaven’tdrowned,”shesaid,theheatfromthesteamingpoolnolonger
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registeringonherskin.Shewishedhergunswerewithinreach.
“Drowning’sonlyoneconcern.There’remanyreasonswhyawomanshouldn’tbeoutherebathingalone.It’sunsafe.”Thesmooth,deepvoicemovedcloserintothecave.
“Perhapsit’smoreunsafewithyouhere.Ifeltquitesafebefore.”Barleighwonderedhowlonghe’d
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beenwatching.He’dclearlyseenenoughtocallherma’amandtoknowthatshewasawomanbathingalone.
“You’resaferthanyouwerebefore.But,toshowyouthatImeannoharm,I’llturnmybackandguardtheentrancetomakesurenooneiswatchingwhileyoutoweloffandgetdressed.See?I’mturningaround.”Heturnedhisbacktothepool.
“You’reeitherbrave,
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orimprudent,turningyourbackonanarmedwomanwhomyou’venevermet.”Inprinciple,true,ifthiswasMr.Lévesque.He’dmetBar.NotBarleigh.
“Lady,ifyouarearmed,I’dliketoseewhereyou’rehidingyourweapon.”
“Well,sir,aknifeIkeepstrappedtomythighatalltimes,justincase.”Shedecidedsheshouldbuyoneofthose,firstchanceshegot.
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Sheslippedoutofthepoolandtiptoedbackwardtowardherguns,liftingthetowelandrushingitoverherbody.Keepingonepistolinhand,shefumbledwithherclotheswiththeother.Impossibletodressquicklyusingonlyonehand,shelaythepistoldownatherfeet.
“Mypistolwasinmytowel—nowit’sinmyhand,”shesaid,knowinghecouldn’tseeinthedarkandwithhis
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backturned.“Myshotgunisatmyside.PleasekeepyourbackturnedwhileIfinishdressing.”
“Yes,ma’am.”“Andcouldyou
pleasesteptoyourleftintothatbeamoflightsoIcanseeyoubetter?Nosurprises.Keepyourbackturned.”
“Asyouwish.”Hesidesteppeduntilhewascenteredunderthesmallrayoflight,hishandsinacasual
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claspbehindhisbackashewhistledasofttune.“Isthiswhereyouwantme?”
“Yes.Thatwilldo.”Shehurriedwiththebinding,wrappingtheswaddlingtightaroundherbreasts,thenpulledonthelongjohns,pants,shirt,andboots.Sheponderedhowshewasgoingtoexplainasuddentransformationfromfemaletomale.Amiracle?Somethinginthemineralwater,like
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Mariosaid,thatshrivelsaman’specker?
“I’llstandhereaslongasyousay.It’smypersonalphilosophytoneverarguewithawomanwhohasagunpointedatmyback.Orwithonewhohasaknifestrappedtoherthigh.OfcourseI’mjusttakingyourwordforitthatyouareindeedarmed,asIdidn’twitnesssaidweapons.Bytheway,I’mHughesLévesque,
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TexasRanger.Andyouare?”“Dressed.Youmay
turnaroundnow.”Whenheturned,the
beamofsunlightunderwhichhestoodilluminatedhisface,sparklingoffoftheflecksofburnishedgoldinhisdeepambereyes,andinthatinstant,Barleighknewhim.
Mydreamwolf.Shesankbackintothe
shadows,transfixed,watchingasheblinkedhard
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againstthebeamoflightfromthesun.Hetiltedbackhisblackhat,andthencockedhishead,listening.Scanninghiseyesacrossthecavetotheright,hesettledupontheexactspotwhereBarleighcrouchedintheshadowsagainstthewarm,wetwall.
Hislongbuffalocoatwasopen,revealingpolishedNavyColtrevolversateachhip.Aburgundyandgoldbrocadevestandacrisplinen
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shirtmoresuitableforadinnerpartyinSaintJosephthanscoutingoutcavesinSaltLakeCitylookedoutofplace.
“I’mstandinginthelight,butyou’rehiddenintheshadows.Ipreferconversationsfacetoface.”Hewaitedforareply.“It’sallright,miss.Iwon’tbite.”
Barleighwatchedandlistenedinsilence.Sherememberedthattherewas
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somethingabouthiseyesthatdisarmedherwhenthey’dmetinSaintJoseph.Thatshedidn’trealizethenthatthoseeyesbelongedtothewolffromherdreamssurprisedher.Theintensitywasunnerving.
“WouldyoufeelbetterifIwaitedforyououtside?”Hebegantobacktowardtheentrance,glovedhandsopen,outstretched,hisshinyspursclinkingagainst
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thewetstonefloor.“Yes.No.I...Idon’t
know,”shestammered,feelingfoolish.“I’m...I’membarrassedthatyousawmenaked.”
“Thecaveisdark.Moredarkthanlight.IhadonlythefaintestideathatIwasseeinganythingmorethanashadowy,shadysilhouette.”Hemovedhishands,makinganhourglassshape.
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“YousawenoughtoknowthatI’mawomanbathingalone,”shesaid,embarrassmentflushinghercheeks.
“It’satrickIlearnedfromanoldIndianscout.Followtheheavyscentoflilacandlavender,andthere’sagoodchanceyou’llfindawomanattheendofyournose.”HisgazeremainedonwhereBarleighstillcrouchedagainstthewallinthe
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shadows.“Oh?Oh,the
shampooandsoap.I,uh,Iwasjustenjoying...Ihaven’tsmelledlikeawomanin...”
“Now,wouldyoupleasecomeoutoftheshadows?”
“No.”“Whynot?”“BecauseI’mafraid.”“Afraidofwhat?By
nowyoumustknowthatI
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meanyounoharm.”“Yes,Iknowthat.It’s
justthat,well,yousee,I,uh,I’veasecret,asignificantsecret,andonceyouknowit,youmustagreetokeepit,too.Otherwise,I’llhavenochoicebuttotakeyourweapons,bindyourhands,blindfoldyou,andleaveyouinthiscaveuntilI’masafedistanceaway.”
“Doyouhaveagundrawnonmenow?”Hughes
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asked,asmilewrinklingthecornersofhismouth.
“Yes.Two.”“Iheardquiet
shufflingandIknowthatyoujustnowpickedyourgunsupoffthefloor.Thescrapeofmetalagainststonegaveyouaway.Andyouneedtoseeacobbleraboutresolingyourboots—theleatherhassomewhatwornthin.Youtappedyourtoeagainstthewall,I’mguessingsearching
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foryourothergun.AlthoughIcan’tseeyou,Icanhearyou.Asbothofusknow,Icansmellyou.Icansenseyou.Youwerecrouching.Nowyou’restanding.IfIhadwantedto,Icouldhavedisarmedyou.Orworse.ButIdidn’t.Youcantrustme.Youknowthatyoucan.”Hisvoiceremainedsmooth,steady,deep,andcalm.
Barleighsighedareluctantsigh,notconvinced
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yetthatsheshouldgivein.“SwearanoathonyourTexasRanger’sbadgeandgivemeyourgentleman’swordthatmysecretissafewithyou.”
“I’mthebestkeeperofsecretsyou’lleverneed,”hesaid.
“Swearonit,”Barleighinsisted.
“Idon’tknowwhichIvaluemore,mygentleman’swordoranoathswornonmybadge,butIgiveyouboth.
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Whateverdarksecretyourevealwillgonofurtherthanthemouthofthiscave.”Hecouldn’ttellherthathealreadyknewhersecret.He’dgivenhiswordtoLeighsellethathe’dfollowherdaughtertoUtahTerritoryandkeepaneyeonhersafety.Amanofhisword,healwayskepthispromises.
“I’maboy.I’mBarFlanders.WemetinSaintJosephafewweeksback.”
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ShewalkedfromtheshadowsandovertothebeamoflightwhereHughesstoodandstuckoutherhand.“It’sapleasuretoseeyouagain,Mr.Lévesque.”Shedidn’tbotherloweringhervoiceanoctave.
Hughesremovedhisgloveandtookherhand.“I’llbedamned.ThePonyExpressrider.Butyou’renotaboy.Justpretendingtobe.”
“Yes,justpretending.”
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Barleighfelttheweightofhisintenseambereyesonhers,andshecouldnotturnawayfromhisgaze.Likeinoneofherdreams,whenshewasonthecloudcirclingaroundthemountainpeakandspiralingbackdowntoearth,andthewolfwouldsilentlycommandhertolookathimandtonotturnaway,itwasthesamewiththisman.
Sheexpectedhimtothrowbackhisheadandoffer
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hishowltothemoonandforthemoontoaccepthisoffering.Buthewasn’tadarksablewolfandthemoonwasn’tout.Barleighwasn’thearinghowling,shewashearingringinginherears—thin,metallicringing—andthedarkcavewasspinning.Shefeltdizzy.Shecouldn’tblinkawaythefuzzinesscloudinghervision.Sheswayedasherkneesgrewweak.
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“Areyouallright,Bar?Here,sitdown.”Hughestookherbybotharms,steadyingher.
“I’msorry.Idon’tknowwhat’swrong.Ifeellightheadedandfaint,allofasudden,”shesaid,hervoiceathinwhisper.
“Howlongdidyoustayinthehotbath?”Hughesspreadhisthickbuffalocoatonthegroundandshesatdownonit.
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“Agoodwhile.Anhouratleast.AndthensomemorewhensomeonescaredmeandIhadtojumpbackin.”
“Right.Sorryaboutthat.Haveyouhadanythingtoeat?Anywatertodrink?”
“Somewateredbrandy,andsomeapricotsandwalnuts.”
“Brandyandalonghotbathwithnotmuchtoeat?GoodGod,woman,it’s
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nowonderyou’redizzy.I’llbebackinaminute.”Andthenhewasgone.
Barleighlaybackandfoughttheurgetoclosehereyesanddriftawaytosleep.Sherolledoveronherside,drawingherkneesupintoatightball,andthenpulledthearmofHughes’scoataroundhershoulders.Hisscentwasstrongonhisgarment,smokyandwoodsy,withthesmellofleather,horsehide,andsaddle
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soapmingledtogetherwithsomethingelse.Shebreathedinagain,smellingsomethingtempting,somethingspicy,likecloves,cinnamon,orcardamom.Theshornlamb’swoolliningwassoftagainstherfaceasshepressedintoitandbreathed,tryingtoidentifythearoma.
Mmm.Whatisit?“Whatiswhat?”
Hugheswalkedbackintothecavewithalarge,tooled
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leatherdufflebagandkneltonthegroundbesideher.“Youwereasking‘Whatisit?’whenIwalkedbackin.”
“Oh.Privatethoughts.”Shehadn’trealizedshe’dspokenaloud.Ared-hotblushclimbedupherneckandblossomedonherface.Shewasthankfulforthedarkness.
“I’msorry.Ididn’tmeantointrudeintoyourprivatethoughts.”Hughes
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openedthebagandreachedinside.Heofferedhiscanteen,thenmoistenedhisbandanaandlaiditacrossherbrow.
“Thankyou.IhopeIdidn’tsoundrude.”Shesippedfromhiscanteenandtooktheclothfromhishand,washingherfacewiththecoolwater.
“Youdidn’t.Yousoundedmatter-of-fact.Andprivate.Now,youshouldeat.
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Ihaveinmybagsomehoneybreadandsmokedham.Morewater—don’tsetthatcanteendown.Drinkup.”
“Doyoualwayssoundlikethat?”Barleighasked,drinkingmorewater.
“Likewhat?”Hughesreachedbackintothedufflebagandtookouttwoplates,arrangingthefood,napkins,andsilverwareasiftheyweredininginafinerestaurant.
“Matter-of-factand
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dictatorial.”Shepickedupthesilverforkwithgoldfiligreetrimandtwirleditbetweenherfingers,thenplaceditbackdownontheembroideredlinennapkinthatlaytuckednexttothesmallpewterplatewithastampedcoatofarmsatitscenter.
Hughespausedandlookedather,seemingtostudyherfaceinthebeamofsunlight.“You’vecat-likeeyes,butblue.Veryblue.
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Andveryfeminine.Nowonderyoukeptthemcastdown.It’spartofyourdisguise,youract,”hesaid.“It’snowonder.Youreyesmightbetrayyou.”
LikeHughes’seyesmightbetrayhim—anotherprivatethoughtshewouldkeeptoherself.
“Soyouconsidermedictatorial?Iprefer‘commanding,’or‘takecharge.’”
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“Icantakechargeofmyself,”shesaid,hervoicetakingonadefensivetone.
“Icanseethat.You’reabraveyounglady,”hesaid,sittingbackandfoldinghisarmsaroundhisbentknees.“MayIaskyou,though,whyyou’redoingsomethingthat’simpossibletosustainlongterm,thismasqueradeofyours,andisreckless,dangerous,andfoolhardy?”
“Reckless,dangerous,
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andfoolhardy?”Barleighbristled.“Youwouldn’tusethosewordstodescribeamaninthisrole.You’dcallhimdaring,valiant,andheroic.”
“Butyou’renotaman.”
“Andithasn’tmattered.”
“Youputyourselfinharm’swayeverytimeyouraceoffwiththatgoddamnedmochila.Pardonmylanguage.Don’tyourealize
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theriskyoutake?Menhavedieddoingwhatyou’redoing.”Hughes’svoicedeepened,hiseyesdarkened.“Takethosewordsseriously.”
“Mr.Lévesque,youdon’tknowmeorknowanythingaboutmylife.You’venorighttoquestionmeabouttherisksItakeorwhatIrealizeordon’trealize.”Shepushedtheplateawayandstoodup,arms
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foldedacrossherchest,pacing,irritated,andincredulous.
“What’syourname?”Hughesstoodup,placingahandonherarm.HeknewhernamewasBarleighAlexandriaHenriettaFlanders—heknewmoreaboutherthansheknewherself—buthehadtogethertotellhim.“Stoppacinglikeadamnedcagedcat.I’msorry—Ididn’tmeantorile
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you.What’syourname?”“Excuseme?”She
stoodwithherarmsstillabarrieracrossherchest.
“Yourname.IsBarFlandersyourrealoryourpretendname?”
“Barleigh.BarleighFlanders.IshortenedittoBar.”
“MissBarleighFlanders,youbecameaPonyExpressriderbyyourdaringhorsemanshipandbravery.I
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didn’tmeantosounddismissiveofyourskillsorcapabilities.You’veprovenyourselfequaltothetask.But,ifyouweremygirl,ifyouweremylittlesister,Iwouldneverallow—Iwoulddoeverythinginmypowertodissuadeyoufromsuchdangerousactivities.”
Withhandsfistedonhips,shetiltedherchintolookHughessquareintheeye.“I’vedonemyjobjustas
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wellasanyPonyExpressrider.Ihaven’tshirkedmydutiesonce.I’maccepted.NoonequestionsthatI’mnotaboy.I’mnotachildishgirlplayingdress-upandmake-believeforthethrillofasillylittlegame.Ineedthisjob.”
Asurprisingurgetocrycamefromdeepwithin.Shetookshakybreaths,tryingtoswallowitaway.Allofthereasonswhyshewashere,andallofthereasons
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whysheshouldn’tbehere,conflicted,gratingagainstheremotions.
“Heynow,comehere.It’sallright.Isworetoyouthatyoursecretissafewithme.I’mthebestkeeperofsecrets—”
“—I’lleverneed.I’msorry,Idon’tknowwhyI’mcrying.Ihatecryingwhenthere’snoreason.”
“It’snotwhatI’dcallafull-blowncry.Justonetiny
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littleleakrighthere.”Hewipedhercheekwithhisthumb.“There,theleakisfixed.”
“Thankyou,Mr.Lévesque.”
“Hughes.”“Hughes.Thankyou.
PleasecallmeBarleigh,butonlyhere,onlytoday.”
“Barleigh.Ihatetobethebearerofbadnews,butthereisonetinylittlethingthatmightgiveyoursecret
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away,thatyou’renotaboy.”“What’sthat?”she
sniffed,wipingathereyes.“Ifyouridebackinto
townsmellinglikeaperfumery,someone’sboundtoraiseaneyebrow.”Helookedather,oneeyebrowraisedincomicalfashion.“LilacandlavenderarenotthescentsofPonyExpressriders.Takeyourshirtoff.I’llberightback.”
“Ibegyourpardon?”
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Shestiffenedandlookedathimwide-eyed.
“Justyourshirt.”Hewavedhishandaround,upanddowninfrontofher,chestlevel.“Leaveallofyourunder-bindingson.”
“Soyoudidn’tseeanythingbutashady,shadowysilhouette’causeit’smoredarkthanlightinhere.”Barleighfeltthebeginningsofablushagainbutbeganunfasteninghershirt.“Where
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areyougoing?”Buthewasalready
gone.Hughesreturnedwith
ahandfulofpineconesandafewsmallbranches,thenbuiltafireonthefloorofthecavebelowthecrevasse.Heboiledwater,makingastrongsmellingteawiththetarrypineneedles,addingthinflakescarvedfromthebarofoilysaddlesoaphehadfishedfromhistravelingbag.
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“Comehere,”hesaid,“andletmesmellyou.”
Shelaughedoutloud.“I’mserious,”hesaid,
lookingather,waiting.“Isthesmellinyourhair,oronyourskin,orboth?Canwefixitwithjustashampoo,orwillyouneedacompletescrubbingdown?”
Hesitatingamoment,shewalkedovertothefireandstoodunderthebeamofsunlight.“Readyfor
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inspection,sir.”Sheheldoutherarmsandheldherbreath.
Hughesmovedaroundandstoodbehindher,inchesfromherbody.Heleanedinclose,grazedhisnosealongthecurveofherneck,inhaling,andthenalongtheotherside,breathinginandout.Thesilkyfinehairsatthebaseofherneckflutteredfromthewarmpuffsofhisbreathagainstherskin.
Sheswayed.Oh.My.
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Steadyonyourfeet.Withhislargehands,
hescrunchedtheminherhair,buryinghisface,breathingin.Heranhisnosealongtheoutsideofeacharmtothetipsofherfingers,turnedoverthepalmtotracebackuptheinsideofherelbow,upandovereachshoulder,thenfolloweddown,downalongthecenterlinedipandcurveofherback,stoppingshort
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whereherunbeltedtrousershunglooseonherhips.
HeplacedhishandsonBarleigh’swaist,turningheraroundtofacehim.“Mydear,”hesaid,hisvoicedeepandhusky,“theverdictisin.”
“Yes?”Breathe.“Idetectonlyafaint
traceoffloralscentonyourskin.But,yourhairissomethingelse.Yourhairsmells—marvelous.Thatproblemneedsfixing.”He
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turnedandwalkedtothepool.
“Allright.Whatdoyouneedmetodo?”Shetingledwheremerelyhisbreathbrushedherskin.
“Laydownhereonyourbackwithyourheadoverthepool,yes,likethat.I’llwashyourhairwiththispineteaandsaddlesoap.Itwon’tsmellasprettyaslilacandlavender,butsmellingprettyisn’twhatBarneeds.”
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Hughesrolleduphissleeves,kneelingbesidethepool,cuppingherheadinonehand,runningthewarmmixturethroughherhairwiththeother,massagingitintoherscalpandpullingitthroughtheshortlengthofherhair.
Byholdingtheweightofherheadinhishandsandwashingherhair,thatoneact,bondedhiswordandhisoath.Relaxationmeltedthrough
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Barleigh.Sheclosedhereyes.Sheimaginedhimholdingalsoinhishandsthesecretsanddreamsandthoughtsanddesiresswimmingaroundinherhead.Andthefears.Hishandswouldnotletthemgobutwouldkeepthemsafe,protected,buoyant,freetofloatwheredestiny’swindsblewthem.
WhatisitaboutHughesLévesque,shewondered,thatmadeherfeel
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asifshe’dknownhimallherlife—andlonger?
Hisbarearm,wetandsoapy,slidagainsthercheek,againstherforehead,andshefeltawarmstirringinthepitofherstomachthatslippeddownlower.Everynervetingled,everysensationmultipliedashisstronghandsandlongfingersscrubbedherscalp,washedherhair,andhelpedtoputherdisguisebackintoplace.
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“Wecanfinisheatingwhilewewaitforyourhairtodry,”Hughessaid,pattingherheadwiththetowel.“Ihaveanothercanteenwithsomehoneyedwhiskey,nowthatyou’refeelingbetter.It’llthickenyourbloodfortheridebacktotown.”
“Thatsoundsnice,”shesaid,takingthetowelfromhim,rubbingherheadwithvigorousstrokes.“I’vealwaysthoughtIneeded
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thickenedblood.Whilewe’rewaiting,youcantellmewhataTexasRangerisdoinginSaltLakeCityinUtahTerritoryviaSaintJoseph,Missouri?”
Hughespickedupalongpineneedlefromthefloorofthecaveandscrapedatthedirtunderhisnails.“Barleigh.I’llsayyournamealot,sinceIcanonlysayithere.Barleigh,there’snotmuchtotell.”
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“Idon’tbelievethat.Tellmesomethingaboutyourselfthatothersdon’tknow,”shesaid,layingthetowelaside.
“What?Yousharedyoursecret,nowIsharemine?”Hughesinspectedhisnailsandflickedtheusedpineneedleaway.
“Yes,somethinglikethat.”Shesippedthehoneyedwhiskeyfromthepewtercupwiththematchingcoatof
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armsastheplateandstudiedhisprofileovertheflickeringfire,thinkinghelookedasmuchlikealionashedidawolf.“Youhavesecrets,don’tyou,”shesaidasastatement.
Hughesheldhergazeforalongmoment,thelightfromthefiredancinginhiseyes.Barleighwishedsheknewwhathewasthinking—whatsecretshecarriedinhiseyes.Helookedaway,careful
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tokeepthemtohimself,hisownprivatethoughts.
“Allright,”hesaidafterapause,“givemeyourlady’swordandswearanoathonyourPonyExpressBiblethatthedarksecretIrevealtoyouwilltravelnofurtherthanthemouthofthiscave.”
Sheraisedherrighthandandcomposedaseriousexpression.“IswearanoathonmyPonyExpressBible
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andgiveyoumywordtokeepyoursecret.”
Hughestookadeep,dramaticbreath.“I’mdeathlyafraidofspiders.Ihatethem,everyeight,horriblelittleleg,allcreepy,crawly,andcrunchywhenyousteponthem.”Heshuddered.
“That’snotfair.”Barleighthrewheremptycupathim,triedtopulldownapout,buthermouthgavewaytoagrin.
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“You’reright,that’snotfair.Ishouldshareasecretbearingequalweighttotheoneyou’veshared.”Hislookwasserious.
“That’sthehonorablethingtodo.”Shewasopentotheseriousnessofhistone.
“Yes,andI’mnothingifnothonorable.”Hesettledasteadygazeonher,asifcalculatingtheoddsonapokergame.“IamaTexasRanger,currentlyinactive.
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Mostly,Iworkforthefederalgovernment.Clandestineoperations.There’sagroupofSouthernsympathizersconspiringtocensortheU.S.mail.TheirspecialinterestisthewestboundmailtoCalifornia.I’mworkingundercovertoseewhatcanbedoneaboutit.”
“IsthePonyExpressmailatriskof—”
“—ofbeingdivertedortamperedwith?Yes.
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That’soneofthereasonswhyI’mhere.”
“Oneofthereasons?”sheasked,herinterestpiqued.“What’stheother?”
“Ah,don’tbegreedy.Onesecretpercustomerperday.Barleigh.”Hisvoiceadoptedasensualquality,softyetmasculine.
Hesmiledandsteadiedhispiercingambereyesonher.Barleighknewthefutilityofresistinghis
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silentcommandtonotlookaway.
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CHAPTERTHIRTEEN
NOVEMBER16,1860
Journalentry:WerodebacktothecitytogetherafterHughessharedtherestofhismealwithmeinthecave.Butthat’sallheshared.Mr.Lévesqueholdshiscardsclose
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tohischestandrevealslittle.HetoldnothingelseabouthimselfexceptthatheisindeedaTexasRangertakingleavetoworkfortheGovernmenttodiscoverwho’sattemptingtotamperwiththemail.
Ihaveastrongintuition,however,thathis
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missionismoreinvolvedthanthatofasingularassignmentofdiscovery.
I’vepromisedtotellnoone,andIshallkeepmypromiseasIexpecthimtokeephis.IfeelIcantrusthim,thoughIdon’tknowwhy.Ihardlyknowhim.But,Ihaveno
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choiceotherthantodoso.Hiscoveristhatheisawealthybusinessmanintownscoutingoutinvestmentopportunities.Heplaysthewealthypartwithcomfortandease.
Amusing,bothofusincognito.Heasabusinessman.Measaboy.Iwonder
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whichrequiresthebiggestleapoftheimagination.
TheSaltLakeHouseistheonlyfinehotelwestoftheMississippi,soMr.LévesquehastakenaroomonthesecondfloornextdoortotheroomkeptforthePonyExpressriders.Thisarrangementmightproveusefulto
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bothofusaswediscussedonourrideintotown.Wecankeepaneyeoutfortheother’sbestinterest.
“Well,ain’tthatsomething,”wasStoney’sexpectedreplywhenweranintohimashewasflyingdownthestairsonhiswayoutthedoorforhiseast-
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boundmailrun,shortbrimmedhatinhand.Stoneyremindedmeagaintokeepaneyeonhissombrero,tonotletMariothrowitaway.IpromisedhimIwould.
Keepingmymindfocusedandontaskwillrequireanextraamountofvigilance.Idon’tknowwhy,but
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thinkingaboutHughessleepinginthenextroomfromwhereIsleepstirsme.It’sgoodthatthereisawallinbetween—abarrier—aphysicalreminderthatImustkeeptomyself.Although,Imightbetemptedtopressmyeartothewalltodiscoverwhatsoundsamanmakes
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whenhe’saloneandthinksnooneislistening.
NextweekendistheHarvestFestival,afulldaySaturdayofsharingfoodandfeedingthepoor.There’llbepie-eatingcontests,yardgamesforthechildren,aquiltingexhibition,abutterchurningcontest,and
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abarndanceintheevening.ThefestivitiesendSundaywithadayofgivingthanksforallourblessingsandforourbounty,the25thofNovember,exactlyonemonthuntilChristmas.
ThatalmostafullyearhaspassedsincePapaandBirdie’ssecret
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“ceremonyofvows,”thenherdiscoverythatthere’dbeababy,seemsimpossible.Buteverythingaboutlastyearseemsimpossible.Iwonderifthat’swhyIridesofastandsohard,thatmaybethefasterIride,thefasterI’llputlastyearbehindme.
Ishouldblow
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outmylamp,putawaymyjournal.Igobackondutyinthemorningandbackinthesaddle.
Themailmustgothrough.
*****BarleighlefttheBath&Bakerystilldampbehindtheears,washed,andwearingcleanclothes.Shemadeherwaytothecourthousesquare,guidedbythelivelyshouts
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andpealsoflaughtercomingfromtheboisterouscrowdinthemeetinghall.Thoughshewastiredfromherearliermailrun,thefestivemoodliftedherspirits.Hearingpeoplelaughing,singing,andhavingfunputasmileonherface.Itfeltlikealongtimesinceshe’dhadagenuinereasontosmile.
“Thereyouare,”shesaidtoStoney,tyinghergeldingtothehitchingpost.
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“Ithoughtyouweresick,ordead.BigBrodytooktheeastboundmochilafrommewhenIrodeinthisafternoon.Hesaidhetookoveryourrun.”
“Hedidn’ttakeovermyentirerun,justthisoneridetonight.Ihadtopayhimaking’sransomtogethimtoagree.BigBrodydon’tlikemissingoutontoomanypie-eatingcontests.Yougoingtoenter?”
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“Me?No,Idon’tthinkI’dbeverygoodatthat.You?”
“Hellyes,I’mentering.Thewinnergetstodancewiththegirlwhobakedthepie,”saidStoney,grinningfromeartoear.“Gettingmyhandsaroundagirl,pullingherbodyclose,smellingperfumeonsoftskin.Getsmehardjustthinkingaboutit.Maybeweshouldgopayavisittothe
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whorehouseinstead.”“MaybeI’llthink
aboutthepie-eatingcontestafterall,”saidBarleigh,anervoustwitchinhervoice.
Thepathwayleadingfromthecourthousesquaretothetownhallwaslinedwithpumpkins,gourds,andsquarebalesofhaydecoratedwithgarlandsofdriedflowersandleaves.Themeltingfromthefirstsnowoftheseasonleftmuddypuddles,thechilled
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eveningairhintingoffrostasstarsbegantoshimmerintheeasternsky.
“Seemsmorelikewinterthanharvesttime,don’tyouthink?”askedStoney,tappingapumpkinwithhisboot.“BackinFrogLevel,Arkansas,harvestisoveranddonewithbynow.”
“It’soverwithhere,too,”Barleighsaid.“TheHarvestFestivalisn’twelcomingitin;it’s
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celebratingthebountythatitleftbehind.And,sharingitwiththeneedy.”
“Wehadharvestfestivals,too,”saidStoneyastheyreachedthetownhalldoors,“butinFrogLevel,myfamilywereamongtheneedyonthereceivingend.”Stoneywaved.“There’sHughesLévesquebythecoattable.”
“Hello,gentlemen,”saidHughesashehandedhiscoattothegirlbehindthe
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table.“IwaswonderingifI’dseeyoutwohere.”
Afterdepositingtheirhatsandcoatsatthetable,Barleighshookhishandandsaid,“I’monmytwo-daybreak,andStoneypawnedhisrideoffonBigBrodysohecouldcomeheretonight,eatapie,anddancewithagirl.”
“Ithinkthatsoundslikeafineplan,”saidHughes,givingBarleighaprivatewink.“Let’salleatapieand
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dancewithagirl.”“I’veneverbeengood
atpie-eatingcontests.Youtwogoahead.I’llwatch.”ThethoughtofdancingwithagirlandthegirlthinkingshewasdancingwithaboycausedBarleightosuppressagiggle.
“Oh,noyoudon’t,”saidHughes.“You’reenteringwithus.It’llbefun.Comeon.I’llevenputupthequarterstobuythepies.Go
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on,gopickoutwhichpieyouwant.”
“Thankyou,sir,”saidStoney,hustlingovertoatableladenheavywithapplepies,pumpkinpies,chocolatecreampies,avarietyofberrypies,andsomepiesundistinguishableaspiesaltogether.
Girls,somesmiling,someshy,someconfidentandbold,anassortmentofgirlsasvariedasthepiestheystood
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behind,waitedtoseewhowouldbuytheirpieandvieforachancetowhirlthemaroundthedancefloor.
“Whatareyoudoing,”Barleighsaidunderherbreath.“Don’tyouknowwhattheprizeisforthewinnerofthecontest?”
“Yes,Idoknow,Barleigh.I’mhelpingyouwithyourcover,”whisperedHughes,stillgrinning.“Thesefolksseeingyouwolfing
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downapieanddancingwithagirlwillbegoodforyourimage.”
“Don’tbecrazy.Anddon’tcallmeBarleigh.It’sBar.And,I’mnotdancingwithagirl.”
“It’sharmless.Idoitallthetime.”
“I’msureyoudo.”“Let’sgofindour
pie.”Hughesstrolledovertothepietable,causingatwitteramongthegirls.“Overhere,
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Bar.Lotsofpiestochoosefrom.”Hewavedwithagrandgesture,drawingattentionhisway.Then,tothegirlsbehindthepies,hesaid,“Thisismyfriend,Bar,aPonyExpressrider.Don’tlethissmallstaturefoolyou.Pickhimoutthebiggestpiehere.”
Adoe-eyedblondebehindthechocolatecreampiewiththickflakycrustsaid,“Mypie’ssmall.Could
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beeateninoneortwobites,ifyou’rehungryenough.”Hereyesshutteredclosedandreopenedinslowmotion,asifeachlashweighedtenpounds.“ButDortheaoverthereattheendofthetable,she’sgotthebiggestpiehere.Couldtakeamanalldaytogetthroughthat.”
Hughesputasilverdollarinthejarandsaid,“We’lltakethree—keepthechange.It’sforagoodcause,
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right?”“Thankyou,sir.It
goesintothefooddrivefund.Now,whichpiesdoyouwant?”
Stoneywastednotimeinclaimingthedoe-eyedgirl’ssmallchocolatepie,pleasingher.Sherewardedhimwithabeamingsmileandbattedlashes.HughesscoopedupthelargepumpkinpieinfrontofDorthea.
“Hereyougo,”he
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said,handingthepietoBarleigh,avoidingherglaringeyes.“And,let’ssee,I’llhavetheniceapplepieoverthere.”
“Notfunny,”shesaidthroughgrittedteethastheywalkedtotherowofchairslinedupbehindthetableofeagerpieeaters.
“Ipickedthebiggestpieforyouasastrategy,”Hughessaidunderhisbreath.“I’vethoughtthisthrough.Stoneywillbedancingwith
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LittleMissDoeEyes,notyouandDorthea.Remember,this’llbegoodforyourboyimage.”
“Myboyimageisjustfine,thankyou,andthispiemay,justmay,beafractionbiggerthantheothers.”
“ThenIrecommendyoueatslowly.”
Afast-talkingmanchewingafatcigarannouncedoneminuteleftforpurchasingpies,butnotto
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worry,therewouldberoundstwoandthreeandperhapsfouruntilallpieshadbeensold.
Atthetable,Stoney,Hughes,andBarleightooktheirplacesalongsideahalfdozenothers,handsinlaps,faceshoveringinchesabovethepies,waitingfortheword“go.”
“Firsttofinishtheirpiewins.And,finishmeansthecrust,too.Nohands—just
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yourgobbler.Ready...set...go!”
Thecrowderuptedwithapplauseandshoutsasallthecompetitorsatthetabledovefacefirstintotheirpies,shovingtheirheadsaround,gruntingandslurpingandrootingthroughthebakedgoodslikestarvingpigs.
Twofaceslookedupsimultaneously.
“Lookslikewehaveatie,andinrecordtime,too,”
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shoutedthecigar-chewingannouncer.“Howintheworlddidyouboysdothatsofast,andwhereintheworlddidyouputit?One’snobiggerthanaflea,andtheothercouldhidebehindabroomstick.”
Barleighlookedaround,meetingHughes’sastonishedeyes.“What?I’mcompetitive.Icouldn’thelpit.”
“AndI’mmotivated
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bysomethingaltogetherdifferent,”saidStoney,walkingovertothepietabletoclaimhisdancingpartner.
Hugheslaughedsohardhefoughtforbreath,holdinghissidesasiftheymightsplit.Wipingtracesofapplepiefromhisface,heshoutedovertothepietable,“OhDorthea,yourdancepartnerawaits.”
Barleighglaredathimandswipedhersleeveacross
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herface,erasingbitsofcrustandpumpkincustardfromhermouthasthefiddleplayerscreechedoutthefirstnotesofawaltz.Dortheastoodatthepietable,herimpatientfoottapping,waitingtobeclaimedforthedance.Withherhandsfistedonhergenerouships,shecockedherheadandstaredatBarleighinthemannerofanenthusiasticwomannotusedtowaiting.
BarleighgaveDorthea
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asheepishsmile.Visualizingherselfdancingasaman,seeingthestepsinhermind—one,two,three,onetwothree,onetwothree—shetoldherselftosimplystartforwardontheleftfoot,notbackwardontheright.Easy.Shereadiedhermindforthetask.
Tiredofwaiting,DortheapushedpastthepietableandstrodetowhereBarleighstood.Clampinga
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meatyfistaroundBarleigh’swrist,DortheapulledBarleighontothedancefloor,leadingandone-two-three-ingherwayaroundthesmallspace.Dortheakeptperfectrhythmwiththefranticnoteseruptingfromthefiddle,eyesclosed,headandbodyswayingassheglidedaroundthefloorinthree-quartertime.
Smilingandsweatinginprofusedropletswhenthe
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lastnotecametoahalt,DortheagaveBarleighonefinalunder-the-armspin,curtseyed,andannouncedinavoiceheardloudandclearbytheappreciativecrowd.
“Ithankyoukindlyforbuyingmypie,butasfarasdancepartnersgo,alittleromancewouldn’tharmyou.Imightaswellhavebeendancingwithmysister.”Withthat,DortheagrabbedBarleighbybothcheeksand
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plantedawet,sloppykissfullonhermouth.
Hughesthrewbackhisheadandletoutaheartylaugh.“ThatwasworththedollarIpaidforthepies,rightthere.”
“I,uh,thankyou,Dorthea,thatwasmy,uh,myfirstpie,Imean,myfirsttimetod-dance...,”Barleighstammeredinawkwardembarrassment.
“Bar,youbetterstop
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whileyou’reahead.Explainingyourselftoawomanisalosingproposition,”shoutedStoneyafterrejoiningHughes,hiscommentelicitingmorelaughterfromthecrowd.
“Comeon,let’sadjournthispartytoWhiskeyStreet,”saidHughes,rescuingBarleighfromthedanceflooranddirectingthemtowardthecoattableandoutthedoor.“Ifyouwanttodanceand
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havesomerealpie,astrolldownWhiskeyStreetiswhereeventheMormonssneakofftoonSaturdaynights.”
“WhiskeyStreet?”askedStoney.“What’sWhiskeyStreet?”
Hughesgavehimanastonishedlook.“You’vebeenherehowlongandhaven’theardaboutWhiskeyStreet?”
“Apparentlynotlong
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enough.Let’sgo,”saidStoney,aneagersmileonhisface.
Barleighbuttonedhercoatandfollowedthemoutthedoor,wonderingwhatshe’dgottenherselfinto.
*****MainStreetthreadednorthandsouththroughthedarkeningtown,andwhereitleftthesoutheastcorneroftheTempleSquareandheadedduesouth,the
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commercedistrictoftheGreatCitybuzzedwithactivity.ThefarsouthendofMainStreetflowedfromoneblocktothenextwithalivelymixtureofsaloons,distilleries,andtipplinghousesandbecamefamiliarlyknownasWhiskeyStreet.Here,thefervorwasforthingsotherthanreligion.
AtthecornerofMainand2ndSouthStreet,Hughessaid,“We’llturnhere.The
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bestwhiskeyaroundisafewstepsaway.TheBaerBrothers’Distillery.Theybrewandbarreltheirown.”
Thesaloonwasn’tyetcrowded,withafewemptychairsatthebar,abilliardstableunmanned,andacardtablewithvacantchairswaitingtobefilled.StoneyandBarleighseatedthemselvesatthecardtable,whileHughesnegotiatedwiththebartenderforthreeglasses
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andabottleofBaerBrothers’finest.
Sittingthebottleandglassesatthetable,Hughessaid,“Thisisnotacontest,Bar,sodon’tletyourcompetitivesideseewhocanfinishthefastest.Finewhiskeyshouldbeenjoyed,slowly.”
Hegrinned,handingBarleighacut-crystalglassofamberliquid,thengaveitasmallsplashofwater.Doing
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thesameforStoneyandhimself,heraisedaglass.“Here’stothemostentertainingpie-eatingcontestI’vepersonallyeverwitnessed.”
“Here,here,”saidStoney,liftinghisglass.
AblushtriedtoformandBarleighfoughthardnottolettheheatrushtoherface.Sheliftedherglass.“Here’stoHughes,amanwhoknowsathingortwo
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aboutpickingtherightpie.”Shetookasip,waitedfortheburn,butwassurprisedbythevelvety,deliciousflavorofsmokycaramelwithahintoforange,andsippedagain.
“Smooth,”saidStoney.“NotliketheValleyTanthatMariokeepsatthebarn.Youmightaswellputthatshitinthemedicinecabinet,nottheliquorcabinet.”
“Ah,ValleyTan,the
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exclusiveMormonrefreshermadewithimportedfireandbrimstone,”saidHughes.“Thealcoholwithmanyuses.Itwasconsideredmedicine,whenitwasoriginallydistilled.”
“Yougentswantmetosendoverthecarddealer?”shoutedthebartender.“He’ssteppedoutsidetomakeuseofthefacilitiesbuthe’llbebackinafew.”
“IpaidBigBrodyfive
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dollarstotakemyruntonight.IbesthangontowhatIhaveleft,”saidStoney,shakinghishead.
“I’masaver,notagambler,”saidBarleigh,thethoughtoftaxesdueonherlandflashingthroughhermind.Losingapennywouldbeunacceptable.
“Iwasthinkingitsoundedlikeasplendididea,”saidHughes.“Ihaven’tenjoyedagoodgameina
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while.Whydon’tIstakeyoueachtwenty-fivedollars?It’llbelikemewinningbackmyownmoney,nolossforme,andweallshareanenjoyableevening.”
“Whosaysyou’llwin?”Barleighasked.Thathe’dautomaticallyassumehe’dwinandshe’dlosemadeherwanttoputhiminhisplaceandshowhimexactlyhowmuchsheknewaboutplayingcards.
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“Oh?Isthisanotherfacetofyourcompetitivenature?”Hughesleanedbackinhischairandraisedaneyebrow.“Idetectachallenge.”
“MygrandfatherspentalotoftimeinNewOrleansontheriverboats.Twothingshetaughtme—onewashowtoplaycards.”BarleighmetthechallengeinHughes’seyes.
“Whatwastheother?”
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askedHughes,sippinghiswhiskey,hiscuriousexpressionshiftingdegrees,darkeningtoaguardedalarm.
“HowtowishIwasn’tbloodrelatedtosomeone.”ShelockedeyeswithHughesforalongmomentthatturneduncomfortable,andthenlookedaway.
“Ithoughtyouwasanorphan,”saidStoney,swirlingthewhiskeyinhisglass.
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“Iwasn’talways.”Hughestappedhis
fingerontherimofhiswhiskeyglass.“We’llplayfive-carddraw.Istakeyoueachtwenty-five.Ifyouwinmorethanthat,paymebackmytwenty-five,thenyoukeeptherest.Ifyoulose,thenit’smyloss,too.AsmallriskI’mwillingtotake.”Hewavedthedealeroverasthemanwalkedinthroughthebackdoor.
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Barleigh,feelingalittlelightheaded,pushedherwhiskeyglassfurtherfromherreach.Sheimaginedwhatherpapawouldthinkifhesawhersittinginabar,drunk,playingpoker.Shemightaswellbechewingonacigar,too,tocompletethepicture.Checkingherposture,sheremindedherselftositlikeaman,tothinklikeaman,tonotletherguarddown.
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Stoneyclearedhisthroat.“Excuseme,Bar,forinterruptingyourreverie.Pickupyourcards.Youlooklikeyou’reamillionmilesaway.”
“Oh,right,sorry.”Shepickeduphercards,fanningtheminonehand,remindingherselfofthefirstruleofpoker.Justbecauseherhandheldtwojacksandthreetenswasnoreasontorevealherlucktotherestofthetableby
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grinningfromeartoear.Shepickedupherglassandraisedittohermouthtohidehersmile,andthentookaverysmallsip.
Afterseveralhands,shehaddoubledhermoney,paidHughesbackhistwenty-five,andwasreadytoleavewithStoneywhohadmanagedtoloseeverything.
“I’mgoingbacktothepie-eatingcontesttofindmylove,Elizabeth.Elizabeth
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AnnabelleParnell.Iwanttomarryher,”saidStoney,hisspeechthoroughlyslurred.“Elizabeth,withthebeautiful,bigbrowneyes.”
“YoumighthavebetterluckwooingtheheartofMissDoeEyedElizabeth,”teasedHughes.“TheQueenofHeartssurewasn’tdoingyouanyfavorshere.”
“Iwon’tneedluck,”saidStoneywithaconfidentair,beforehiccoughing.“I
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thinkshelovesme.”“Bar,youmightwant
tostickaround,”Hughessaid,noddingtowardtwowell-dressedgentlemenwalkingtowardthecardtable.“Ithinkthestakesaregettingreadytogobig.”
“Aretheseseatsvacant?Careifwejoininyourgame?”askedtheheavysetmanwithroundspectaclesandawalrusmustache.
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“I’mjustleaving,”saidStoney.“Youcomingorgoing,Bar?”
“I’llstayandplay.IfIwinanothertwenty-five,I’lltossitovertoHughesandpayyourdebt.”
“You’resoundingprettybold,”saidHughes.“Butremember,Isaidthatifyoulostyourtwenty-five,Iconsidereditmyloss,too.Stoneydoesn’toweme.”
“Youtwocanargue,”
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saidStoney,shakingHughes’shand.“Asforme,I’mgoingtofindmylostlove.Thankyouforthepokergame.ItwasthemostfunI’veeverhadlosing.”
AnotherbottleofBaerBrotherswassenttothetable,courtesyofthebartender.Thedealershuffledanewdeckwithlightning-fastfingersanddeclaredthetablenowdoubled,ifallplayersagreed.Allnoddedtheiracceptance.
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Underthetable,HughesbumpedBarleigh’skneewithhis,andthenwhispered,“Doyouwantthetwenty-fivebackyourepaidme?Itmightcomeinhandywiththesegents.Ihaveafeelingthey’regoingtobeloosewiththeirbets.”
“Thenthey’llbebiglosers,”shesaid.“Thankyou,butno.”
Somewhereinthecourseoftheevening,
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BarleighnoticedthatHughes’skneewentfromanaccidentalbumportwoagainstherkneetohisthighrestingagainstherscontinuously.And,somewhereinthecourseoftheevening,shewentfrombeingdistractedbythetouchtobeingevenmoredistractedwhenthetouchwasmomentarilyabsent.
Thebespectacledwalrusmanlostbigandlost
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quickafterafewhands,whilehisshort,baldpartnerwiththeunblinkingeyesheldontohismoneywellintothenight,increasingitbyhalfbeforelosingitallaswell.
*****“Congratulations,Barleigh,Idon’tknowifyou’regood,orlucky,orboth.Whatwasyourfinaltake?”Hughesasked.
TheystrolledalongtheupperendofWhiskey
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Street,theplanksidewalkdarkandemptyexceptforanoccasionalpasserby.Barleighjiggledthegoldandsilvercoinsinherpockets,feelingagainthebulgeofpapermoneywaddedintheinsidebreastpocketofhercoat.
“Iquitcountingattwohundredfiftyorso.Howcanpeoplethrowmoneyawaylikethat?Whatdothosepeopledoforalivingthattheycanlosehundredsof
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dollarsanightandnotblinkaneye?”ThethoughtoflosingthatmuchmoneymadeBarleighnauseated.
“They’reownersofsilverandcoppermines.Afewhundreddollarsisadropinthebucketforthosegentlemen.Yousuretookthembysurprise.Andme,too.”
“Pardonmeforasking,butdidyouthrowahandortwomyway?”she
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asked,herquestionserious.Hugheslaughed.“I’m
ascompetitiveasyouare.Idon’tlikelosing—moneyoranythingelse.Here,walkthisway.”Heturnedleftdownanarrowalleythatwoundseveralyardsthroughacourtyardbeforecomingtoadeadendbehindarowofemptyshopsthatwereclosedforthenight.
“Whatarewedoinghere?”
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“Iwanttotalktoyouinprivate,awayfromtheothersatthehotel,andthislookedlikeithadpossibilities.”
“Whatdoyoumean?Talkaboutwhat?”
“Abouthowlongyoucankeepthisup.AbouthowdangerousbeingaPonyExpressriderisandhowI...”
Sheplacedherindexfingeracrosshislips.“Don’t
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sayanymore.We’vecoveredthistopicinthecave.Youdon’thaveanyrighttointerfere.”
Hughestookholdofthefingershe’dplacedacrosshismouth,pullingitaway,runninghishanddowntoherwrist,hisfingerseasilyencirclingitscircumference,andhekissedtheundersideofit.Thenhepressedhismouthtoherpalm,lingeringhislipsthere.
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“God,IwishIhadtherighttointerfere.EverytimeIwatchyourideawaybyyourself,runafterrun,takingsuchrisks,Igetso—distracted.It’sdrivingmecrazy,knowingthedangeryou’rein.”
“Whatareyoudoing?Whatareyousaying?”Shepulledherhandoutofhisgrasp.“Youcan’tdothat.I’mBarFlanders.PonyExpressRider.Aboy.”
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Barleighstaredatherpalmwherehislipshadtouched,thenpressedherhandstogether,tryingtorubthesensationawaythatleftherheadlight,herkneesunsteady.
“You’reBarleighFlanders,PonyExpressriderdisguisedasaboy.Butawomanwho—”
“—whoyoushouldn’tbesayingthesethingsto.Stopit.You’redrunk.You’re
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notmakingsense.”Shetriedtobackaway,butabrickwallstoppedherretreat.
“—whodrivesmecrazywithdesire.Madwithworry.Idon’thandleworryverywell.Iwanttokissyou.”
“That’sthewhiskeytalking.That’snonsense,that’s—”
Hismouthcoveredhers,softandtenderatfirst,thenmoreinsistent,histongueseekinghers.
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Entwininghisarmsaroundherwaist,hepulledherclose,liftinghertohertoes.Hishungrykissessoughtnourishmentfromherlips.
WordsofcautionflittedthroughBarleigh’smindlikesummerbutterflies.Shethoughtofcapturingthem,butletthempassunfettered.Pressingagainsthim,enjoyingthesensation,shewantedtoknowthetasteofhismouth,thefeelofhis
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hardbody,thesmellofhisbreath.Herhandsexploredhisneck,hisback,hisarms,andshepulledhimcloser,wantingtofeeleverypartofhim.Shefeltdizzy,andcouldn’tblameitallontheBaerBrothers’whiskey.
Hishandscuppedherface,tiltingherhead,exposingherneck,andtherehelingered,kissing,biting,trailinghistonguealongthecurveofherear,downthe
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sideofherneck,stoppingwithakissatthebaseofherthroat.
Hegroaned,pullingaway.“Icouldgoonforeverkissingyou.Idon’twanttostop,butI’dbettergetcontrolofmyself.”
Barleighblinkedhard,tryingtocatchherbreath,tryingtofindherbalanceagainstthecoldbrickwallshestoodagainst.“I—thatwas—Idon’tknowwhatto
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say.”“Sayyou’lltakeyour
pokerwinnings,gobacktoTexas,andstopthistomfoolery.Iworryaboutyouanditdrivesmecrazy.I’mnotgoodatworrying.Idon’tknowwhattodowithit.It—interferes.”
“Hughes,”shesaid,releasingadeepsigh.“Thankyouforworryingaboutme,butIcantakecareofmyself.Besides,I’menjoyingthe
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challengeandI’mgoodatwhatIdo.”
“Thendomeafavorandconsiderthis,”hesaid,drawinghernear,leaningin,brushinghislipsagainsthers.“ConsidertakingStoneyintoyourconfidence.Now,don’tstartbristlingbeforeyouhearmeout.”
“No.Absolutelynot.WhyshouldIevenconsiderthat?”Barleighputbothhandsagainsthischestin
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protest.“Thingsareheating
upwiththismail-tamperingbusinessandIhavetoleaveforCaliforniafirstthingMonday.I’dleavefeelingmuchbetterknowingStoneywaskeepinganeyeonyouandwatchingtomakesureyou’resafe.”
“Keepinganeyeonme?MakingsureI’msafe?What?”
“Thementryingto
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stealthemailarevigilanteswho’llstopatnothing.They’reSouthernsympathizerswho’rewillingtokilltokeepPresidentLincoln’slettersfromreachingCalifornia.They’vealreadykilledotherswho’vegottenintheirway.TheUnionneedsCalifornia’sgold.SodoestheConfederacy.Ifwegotowar,California’sgoldcouldswaytheoutcome.”
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Barleightookadeepbreathandlethiswordssoakin.Ifwegotowar?Shefeltagrowingsenseofurgencyandalarm.Somuchwasatstakegettingthemailthrough,nowsomorethanever.“Tellmemore.”
“I’vealreadytoldyoutoomuch.”
“Thenyou’reindanger,too,spyingonthesevigilantes.”
“Yes,”hesaid,
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placinghishandsagainstthewalloneithersideofBarleigh’sshoulders,formingabarrier.“That’swhyI’dfeelmuchbetterifIknewStoneywasmybackup.IfthingsgobadwhileI’mnothere,it’dhelpifheknewthetruth.Iknowwecantrusthim.”
“I’llconsiderit,thoughI’mnotclearexactlywhyhisknowingmysecretwillkeepmesafe.WhydoIhavethefeelingthatyou’re
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nottellingmeeverything?”Shelookedupintohiseyes,hopingforasatisfyinganswer.
“Trustmeonthis.Please?Ihavemyreasons,”hesaid,hisvoicedeepandpersuasive.
“MayIsleeponit?”sheasked,notyetpersuaded.
“Ofcourse.Wecantalkaboutitoverlunchtomorrow.”Heleanedinclose,hishanddrawingher
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facetohis.“Don’tpullback.Kissme.”
“Imayhavetotaketheeastboundruntomorrow.Eaganistraininganewriderandit’sStoney’sdayoff.”Shepulledfurtheraway.“Butnomorekisses.”Sheknewthekissinghadtostop.Shecouldn’triskbeingcaught.Thethoughtofbeingseen,ofbeingfoundout,oflosingherjob,terrifiedher.
“Allright,nomore
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kisses,”saidHughes,“afterthislastone.”
HughestookBarleighinhisarmsandkissedheragain,longanddeepandslow—anilluminatingkiss,makingtheinvisiblevisible.Pressingheragainstthewall,heleanedin,movinghisbodyagainsthersinawaythatsenthersensestumbling,sliding,radiating,thatonelastkissstealingherbreathandherheart.
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*****WalkingtowardMainStreet,BarleighandHughessteppedfromtheshadowswherethealleycrossedthroughthecourtyard.Nearthecenter,threemenstoodtogetherinanapparentone-sidedconversation,onemanspeaking,theothertwonodding.AsBarleighandHughesneared,theonemanwhowasspeakinghurriedaway.Theothertwofigures
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turned,crossedtheirarms,andstoodinwait.
“Excuseme,gents,”saidHughesastheytriedtopass.
Shouldertoshoulder,theyblockedtheway.“Youhavesomethingthatbelongstomyboss,”thebiggeronesaid,hisvoiceclearandfullofmenace.“Hewantsitback.Allofit.”
“Youmustbemistaken,”saidHughes.“I
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don’tknowyouoryourboss.”
“Mybossisthemanyoucheatedatwhatwassupposedtohavebeenafriendlygameofpoker.Handoverthemoney.”Hedrewhisweapon,pointingitatHughes.
HughesraisedhishandsandtookaslightstepinfrontofBarleigh,whoalsoraisedherhands.Then,addressingthetwomen,he
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said,“Gents,thatmoneywaswon,andlost,fairandsquare.Nocheatingoccurred.”
“We’renotheretoconverse.We’reheretocollect.Justhandoverthemoneyandnoonegetshurt.IfBosssaysyoucheatedhim,youcheatedhim.Hewantsitallback.”Hethrusthisgunforwardforemphasis.
“It’snotallhismoney,”Barleighspokeup.
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“I’llkeepwhatwehadtobeginwith.Youcantaketherest.”
“Thisisnotanegotiation,”thesmalleronesaid,drawingandpointinghispistol,Barleigh’smidsectionhistarget.“Youmustbetheoneholdingthemoney.Keepyourhandsup.Whichpocketisitin?”
HughesandBarleighlookedateachother,anunderstandingpassing
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betweenthem.Theybothknewwhereshe’dputthebundleofmoney.Itwasstowedinherinsidebreastpocket.
ThesmallmantookastepinBarleigh’sdirection,pistolinonehand,theotherreadytosearch.Hefumbledinherpantspocketsandfrownedashecameawaywithahandfulofcoins.
“IknowBossplayswithbiggerstakesthanthis.
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Where’stherest?”HestartedtopatdownBarleigh’scoat.
“Ihavetherest,”saidHughes.“It’sinmyinsidecoatpocket.There’sfivehundreddollarsinthere.You’reright.Yourbosslostbig.Buthecametothetablewithonlythreehundred.Ibetifyoutookhimbackthethreehundredhelost,andyoutwokeptahundredeachforyourselves,he’dneverknowthedifference.”
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Thesmallmanstoppedhispat-downofBarleigh’scoat,lookingtothebiggermanforguidance.ThebigmangaveanodofhisheadtowardHughes,andwiththatthesearchshifted.
“Unbuttonyourcoat,thenhandsbackintheair,”thesmallmansaidtoHughes.“You,”helookedatBarleigh.“Youkeepyourswherewecanseethem.Idonesawthatyou’renotarmed.”
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Hughesdidashewastold.
Themantookhispistoland,withthetip,openedHughescoatwider.“Youwon’tbeneedingthis.”HeremovedtheColtrevolverhangingatHughes’shipandplaceditinhisownholster.“Whichside’sthemoney?”
“Left.”Hereachedinand
pulledoutatooledleatherwallet,theinitialsHPLin
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fancyscript.Asheopenedthewallet,hismouthmovedashecountedthebillsinside.Witheyesbulging,helookedatHughes.
“Youlied,mister.There’snotfivehundredinhere.”
“Hey,whatareyoutryingtopull?”thebiggerofthetwoasked,steppingclosetolookinsidethewallet.
“Seehere?There’snotfivehundred,”saidthe
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smallerone,holdingthewalletopenforthebigman’sinspection.“There’sclosertoathousand.Lookslikeourluckynight.Bossgetshisthree,weget...”Heusedhisfingerstocount.“Well,wegettherest.”
Withtheirfullattentiondrawntothewalletandontheirgoodfortune,Hughesbroughthishandsdowninaplummetingrush,slammingthetwomen’s
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headstogetherwithasickeningcrunch.Thesmalleronefellsideways,unconscious.Staggered,thebiggermantotteredonhisfeet,eyesblinking.Deliveringaswiftkick,Hughesknockedthegunoutoftheman’shand,followedbyapunchtothegutthatdroppedthebigmantohisknees,leavinghimgaspingforair.
“Ibelievethisbelongs
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tome,”saidHughes,reachingforhisColtrevolverinthesmallman’sholster.Asheleaneddowntoretrievehisgun,thebigmanlungedforward,knockingHughesoffbalance,thegunslippingfromhisgrasp.Theystruggledontheground,tradingpunches,thebigmangropingforhisowngunthatHugheshadkickedfromhishand.
Runningtoscoopup
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bothdroppedweapons,Barleighstuffedoneinherpocket,theotherreadytohandofftoHughes.Shewasunawarethatthesmallermanhadregainedconsciousness.Hegrabbedherankleassheranby,pullingBarleightotheground,theweaponinherhandfallingfromhergrasp.Sherolledtoherback,tryingtoretrievethepistolshe’dstuffedintoherpocket,butthemanwasquicktostraddle
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her,pinningherarmstohersideswithhisknees.Hepickedupthedroppedgunfromthedirt,raiseditbutt-endfirsttodeliverablowtoherhead.
Struggling,bucking,andtwistingherbody,Barleighthrashedherlegs.Thoughhewasthesmallerofthetworobbers,hisweightwasmorethanshecoulddislodgewithouttheuseofherarms.
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Shewinced,bracingherselffortheblow.Insteadoffeelingtheguncomingdownhard,shefelthisentirebodycollapseontohersinadead-weightfall.Bloodsprayedontoherface—Barleighscreamed.Anotherscream—butfromwhere?Loud,nexttoherface,itcamefromthemanlyingacrossherasthecomprehensionofwhathadhappenedshockedhimoutof
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hismomentarystupor.Hughes,havingseen
whatwashappening,hadtakenhisRezinBowiefromhisrightbootlegandzippeditthroughtheair,aimingitatthebaseofthesmallman’sskull.
“Myear,”hescreamed.“Youslicedoffmygoddamnedear.”Holdingahandovertherightsideofhishead,bloodpouredbetweenhisfingers.
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HughesdashedovertowhereBarleighlay,thesmallmanstillstraddlingher.Hewrappedbothhandsaroundtheman’sarm,andinaninstantaneousmove,yankedhimoffherwithsuchbrutalforcethatitdislocatedtheman’sjoint.Thesmallmandroppedtotheground,holdinghisshoulder,writhingandcryingoutinpain.
Hughesscoopeduphisgun.Stridingtowherethe
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manlayonhisside,heforcefullybootedthesmallmanoverontohisback.“Lookatme,fucker.”
“Don’tkillme,mister,”hepleaded,holdinghisshoulder,hisvoicefullofpain.“Pleasedon’tkillme.Ididn’tmean...”
“I’mnotheretoconverse.I’mheretokill.”Hughesraisedthegun.
“No,Hughes!”Barleighrushedtohisside.
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“He’snotworthit.Iwouldn’twasteabulletonhim.”
“Oh,Iwould.Ihaveplentyofbulletstowasteonfilthyanimalslikehim.”
“Ihaveplentytowasteonfilthyanimals,too,”saidafamiliarvoicecomingfromthefarsideofthecourtyard.“Whatkindoffilthareweusingfortargetpracticetonight?”Stoney,hisrevolverdrawn,movedtoHughes’sside.
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“Thethievingkind.Thekindwhodotheirlyingboss’sdirtywork.”Hughesloweredhisgun,holsteringit.Hekneltandtooktheman’sgun,thenpattedhimdownforotherweapons.Findingnone,hejerkedthemantohisfeetandsaid,“Wakeupyourbigbuddyoverthere,thengotellyourbosstostayawayfromgameshe’snotgoodatplaying.”
Barleighturnedand
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lookedatwherethebigmanwaslaying,moaning,hisunsightlyfaceswollenandbloody.Hewasstrugglingtohisknees,babblingincoherentwords.Hanginguselessandlimp,hisrightarmwasbentatanoddanglemidwaybetweenthewristandelbow.
Stoneyaimedhispistolatthesmallman.“You’vebeengivenyourmarchingorders.Makehaste
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beforewechangeourmindsandstartwastingbullets.”
Thetwobloodiedmenhobbledoff,leaningoneachotherforsupport.
“Areyouallright?”HugheswasinfrontofBarleigh,peeringintoherface,hishandonherchin,turningherheadleftandright.“You’vegotacutonyourforehead.”
“Whenhetrippedme,Ihitmyheadontheground.
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It’snotbad.I’llbefine.”ShereacheduptotouchthecutandfeltHughes’sfingersstillthere.“Areyouallright?Yougottheworstofit.”
“Theygottheworstofit.”
“Youalmostkilledthem.”Therealityofwhathadtranspiredwashedoverher,andsheshivered.
“Iaimedtokill.Hegotlucky.Iwouldhavefinisheditifhe’dhurtyou.”
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Stoneyclearedhisthroat.“Don’tmeantointerrupt,butwhatthehelljusthappened?”
“Barwonbigatpoker.Thelosersentthosetwoidiotstorobusandgethismoneyback.Itdidn’tquiteworkoutthewaytheyplanned.”
“I’dsaynot.Ishouldhavestuckaround.Imissedallthefun.”Stoneyholsteredhispistol.
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“Allthefun?Didn’titworkoutforyouandthedoe-eyedblonde?”askedHughes.
“No,sir,itdidnot.Myheart’saswoundedasthatbigman’sfaceyoupummeled.”StoneypulledabottleofValleyTanfromhiscoatandthrewbackaslug,offeringthebottletoHughes,thentoBarleigh.
“God,no.AfterBaerBrothers,that’dbesacrilegious.Let’swalk,”said
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Hughes,steeringBarleighandStoneytowardtheSaltLakeHouseHotel.
“WhenIfoundElizabethtoaskhertomarryme,”continuedStoney,hisbreathcloudedwithwhiskey,“shetoldmeshe’salreadymarried.She’swifenumberseven.Seven!Allatthesamegoddamnedtime.Canyoubelieveit?Men—Mormonmen—canhaveallthewivestheycanstand.Butthe
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wives?Theygetjustonehusband.Nowwhointhehellcameupwiththatshit?”
“Icanbetitwasn’tawoman,”saidBarleigh,shudderingatthethought.
Astheynearedthehotel,Stoneystoppedwalking.HughesandBarleighturned,waiting,watchingStoneytoseewhathewasdoing.Raisingahandasifseekingpermissiontospeak,heclearedhisthroat
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andrubbedthehanddownhisface,pullingonaseriousexpression.
“IfIcanseewhat’shappening,thenotherscantoo.”Stoneycrossedhisarms,thenuncrossedthem,andthenshovedhishandsinhispockets,clearinghisthroatagain.
“Whatareyousaying,Stoney?”Barleighasked,ignoringthenaggingvoiceinherownheadthatmirrored
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thosesamewordsofcaution.Helookedfrom
BarleightoHughes,thenbacktoBarleigh,startingandrestartinghiswordsuntiltheyflowedfreely.“Tonightatthepie-eatingcontest,thenatthepokergame,IsawthewayHugheslookedatyou.Sorry,Hughes,butIdid.Andthelooksweren’tone-sided,Bar.Youtriedtohideit,Icouldtell,butmaybe’causeI’myourfriendIpickeduponit
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quicker.AndIseenthewayy’all’sfingerslingeredonthewhiskeybottle,theglass,onthecards,orthemoney,onanythingthatmightlendachancetotoucheachother.Hughes’sconcernoverthecutonyourforehead.”Stoneylookedateachofthem,thenshruggedhisshoulders,aninnocentgesture,apologizingforwhathehadseen.
HughesthrewBarleigharaised-eyebrow
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gesture,thenlookedatStoney.“Iknowwhatyouthinkyousaw,”beganHughes,“but—”
Stoneyheldupbothhands,palmsout.“Please.”Hecontinued.“I’mnotheretopassjudgmentonyourprivatebusiness.Butotherswill.They’llpassjudgment,allright,thenpasstheshotgunswhilethey’regoodandriledup.SeemshereinthisGreatSaltLakeofaCity,
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amancanhaveasmanygoddamnedwivesashewantsatonetime,seveneven,ifheseesfit.Buttwomencan’thavetenderfeelingstowardoneanotherwithoutitgettingthemrunoutoftown.Orkilled.EvenIknowthat,andI’man...anuneducatedgruntfromArkansas.”
“Stoney,youdon’tknowwhat—”Barleightriedtoreason.
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“AllI’msayingis,”interruptedStoney,“ifI’vepickeduponit,itwon’tbelongbeforeothersdo,too.Youbestbemorecareful.”HethrewbackanotherslugoftheValleyTanwhiskey,makingawincingfaceandshudderinghisshouldersasitwentdown.
BarleighbithercheektokeepfromlaughingandlookedatHughes,whowasstiflingalaughaswell.Ina
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lowvoice,shesaid,“You’reright,Stoneyneedstobebroughtinonmysecret.I’lltellhimfirstthinginthemorningafterhesleepsthisoffandapotofblackcoffeesobershimup.”
“Splendididea,Barle...Bar,”saidHughes.
“Youtwocanstandtherewhisperingtillmorningifyouwant,”saidStoney.“I’mgoingtobedanddreamupmyownreligionwhereI
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getasmanywivesasIcanstand,allatthesamegoddamnedtime.G’night.”
*****Thenextmorning,BarleighleftthehotelbeforeStoneyawoke,wantingtotakealongwalktoclearhermind—somethingdifferent,notonhorsebackforachange.Theunseasonablywarmweatherinvitedthecastingoffofcoatsandgloves,butnotthecastingoffoftroubled
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thoughts.Sheheadedoutoftowntowardthefoothillswithacanteenfullofblackcoffeeandamindjumbledandconfused.
ShethoughttellingStoneywouldbeeasy,justcomerightoutwithit,butfiguringoutthebestwaytotellhim,whichexactwordstouse,provedtricky.Asshewalked,shetriedoutafewscenarios,practicingherspeechoutloud.
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“Hi,Stoney,Ihaveasecrettotellyou.I’mreallynotahomosexualcarryingonaflirtatiousrelationshipwithanotherman;I’mreallyagirlmasqueradingasaboy.So,Iguessforalltheworldtosee,itdoesappearthatIamahomo...”
Discardingthatone,shetriedanother.
“Hi,Stoney.I’magirl.Pretendingtobeaboy.Butyoucan’ttellanyone,
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eventhoughyou’veswornontheBibletobehonestandtrustworthyandIhavetoo,butIhavetoaskyoutolieformeandtonottellanyone...”
Shit.Drainingthelastdrop
ofcoffeefromthecanteen,shelookedaround,noticinghowfarshe’dwalked.Assheturnedbacktowardtown,shesawaloneriderapproachingatasteadycanter,silhouettedagainsttherisingsun.Ashe
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rodenearer,theshapeofasombreroglowedlikeasoftyellowhalointhemorninglight.
“Stoney,how’dyouknowIwashere?”shesaidwithasmile.Shewasnervousbutreadytogetthisoverwith.
“Cookiesaidyoufilledacanteenandtookoffwalking.ThisistheoneplaceIknewtolook,afterIdidn’tfindyouatthebarn.”
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“How’syourheadache?”
“Aww,takesmorethanalittlewhiskeytogivemeapounder.I’mfine,butIneedtohaulyourassbacktotown—youhavearuntogetreadyfor.Mariosaidthisonehassomeurgentlettersofsomesort.Hopon.”
“Thanks.”ShegrabbedholdofStoney’sarmandthrewalegoverthebackofthesaddle,ridingdouble
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behindhimonthebigchestnutgelding.Thehorse’seasystridewassmoothandfast,thetowngrowinglargeonthehorizon.
“Stoney,rememberlastnightwhen—”
“Iremember.Irememberthat’sit’snoneofmybusiness.Isureashelldon’tunderstandit,butthatdon’tchangeourfriendshipifthat’swhatyou’reworriedabout.”
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“That’s—I’mrelievedtohearthat—butwhatIhavetotellyoumightchangeourfriendship.Thesecretthatwespokeoflastnight—”
“Shouldstayasecret.Idon’twanttohear.Idon’twanttoknow.Idon’t.ImeantwhatIsaid,Bar.Whatever’sgoingonbetweenyouandHughesis—”
“Stoney,listentome.WhatI’mtryingtotellyouisthat....Damnittohell—I’m
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agirl.”“Girlssaythingslike
‘damnittohell.’Mensay‘fuck.’Soyou’rethegirlinthe,uh,relationship.Iwaswonderinghowthatallworked.Itriednotthinkingaboutit,butIconfess,Iwondered.Iguessedyou’dbethegirlandHughesthe—”
“Stoney.Listentome.I’mnotaboy.Atall.Period.I.Am.Agirl.”Barleighwoundherarmstightly
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aroundStoney’swaistandpulledherselfclosetohim,huggingforcefullytohisback,pressingherchestagainsthim.“Doyoufeelthese?Thesearebreasts.Mybreasts.”
“Whatthe—”StoneytwistedhimselfintwoashespunaroundinthesaddletogetagoodlookatBarleigh,hiseyesaswide-openashismouth.Thefastmovementcausedhimtojerkonthe
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reins,pullingtoohardonthehorse’smouth,bringingthehorsetoagrindingstop.Thecombinationofthehorse’sabruptstopandStoney’sowncentrifugalforcespunhimrightoutofthesaddle,bringingBarleightumblingtothegroundwithhim.
“Holyfuck,”saidStoney,stumblinganddustinghimselfoffashegrabbedforthereins.“But,Ithoughtyou—everyone
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thinksyou’reaboy.Areyougoingtotellmewhatthehell’sgoingon?”
“Yes,yesIam.EverythingI’vetoldyouaboutmyself—”
“Youain’ttoldmemuchexceptyou’reanorphanfromTexas.Shit,I’velearnedmoreaboutyouinthelasttwenty-fourhoursthanIhavesincewejoinedupinArkansas,aboutyourgrandpateachingyoucardsandyou
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wishingyouwasn’thiskin,andnowthis.It’snowonderyoukepttoyourself.Ithoughtyouwasjustthequiettype,butgoodGoda’mighty.”
“Listen,Stoney,Ineedthisjob.Ineedthemoney.Thisistheonlyway,theonlydecentway,asinglegirlcanearnarespectablewage.”Barleigh’smindflashedovertheremembranceofMr.Goldthwaiteandhis
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indecentproposal,thememorygivingherbodyashudder.
“Holyfuck,andgoodGoda’mighty,”Stoneysaidagain,scratchinghishead.
“I’lltellyoueverything,butI’mbeggingyoutokeepmysecret.Ifyoucan’t,Iunderstand.I’llrideawayandgobacktoTexas.Iwon’taskyoutodoanythingagainstyourconscience.”
“WhosaidIhada
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conscience?”StoneygrinnedandreachedforBarleigh’shand.“Idon’tseeanyreasonIshouldgoblabbingyourpersonalbusinessaround.I’llkeepquietaboutit.Iwanttoknoweverything,butfirst,Iwanttoknowhowyoukeepthem...”Hepointedatherchest.“Imean,whatdoyoudowiththemwhen....Well,ain’tthatsomething!”
“Normally,Ikeepthemtightlybound.Iwear
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baggyboy’sclothes,”shesaid,feelingoverwhelmedwithemotion.“Thankyou,Stoney,you’reagoodfriend.”Sheshookhishand,onefirmpumplikeaman.“Keepyourhorseataslowwalkbacktotown.There’salottotellyou.”
Stoneypickedhissombreroupofftheground,dusteditoff,andthensatitonhishead,tighteningthebolerounderhischin.
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Grinningfromeartoear,hegatheredthereinsandsteppedintothestirrup,sayingtohimself,“Well,ain’tthemsomething!”
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CHAPTERFOURTEEN
NOVEMBER26,1860
HughesLévesqueawokefromalight,troubledsleeptothesoundoffootstepsinthehallleavingfromtheroomnextdoor,theroomthatbelongedtothePonyExpressriders.He’dlistenedtothosequick,surefootstepsbefore.
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Heknewtowhomtheybelonged.
Slippingoutfromunderthewarmcovers,Hughesstrodetothewindowanddrewbackthecurtains,watchingasBarleighleftonfoot,carryingacanteenandheadinginthedirectionofthefoothills.Hewonderedwhyshewaswalking.Then,hismindstillinthehalffogofsleep,hethoughtofthekissesthey’dsharedtheprevious
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night,ofhowgoodherbodyfeltpressedagainsthis,andhewonderedwhyshewasn’tthereinhisarms—orinhisbed.
Heshookhisheadandpoundedhisfistsagainsthistemples,thenrubbedhiseyes,tryingtogethismindstraight.Hewasheretodoajobforanoldfriend—tokeepaneyeonherdaughter—andhe’dstrayedofcourse.How’dheletthathappen?
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He’dbetterreininthatsenseofprotectivenessbeforeitgothimintrouble.Butitwasalotmorethanasenseofprotectivenessthathe’dfeltthenightbefore.
Whenhe’dreturnedtothehotel,atelegraphfromJamesonhadbeenwaitingforhim.Itnowlayopenonhisbedsidetable.Hughesreachedforit,readingitagainforthefourthtime.Itwasbrief,simplystatingthatMiss
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LeighselleBeauclairewasneardeathandthatDocSchmidtwaskeepinghersedatedandpeacefulwhilegivinglittlehopeforanoptimisticoutcome.
Hughesthrewthetelegraminthetrash,thensatonthesideofthebed,leaninghisheadinhishands,rakinghisfingersthroughhishair.“Fuck.”Hepoundedhisfistonthetable.
Feelingrestless,his
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mindunsettled,hepacedthefloor.Onthemantel,theblackmarbleandgoldfiligreeclocktickedawayathisthoughtsashewalkedbackandforthbetweenthewallsofhisroom.Heinspectedhisnails,pickedatagrainofdirt,andlookedagainatthetelegramcrumpledinthewastebasket.SendingareplytoJamesoncouldwait—whathewantedtosaycouldn’tbesaid.Yet.
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Soonerorlater,though,he’dhavetotellLeighsellehecouldn’tcontinuekeepinghersecret—ifLeighselledidn’tdiefirst.
Hewenttothewindowandthrewitopen,breathinginthecool,crispair,clearinghismind.Feelingcagedin,seeingthemountains,hehadanurgetobeoutside.Momentslater,Hugheswasdressedandoutthedoor.
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Afterastopinthekitchen,hewasonhiswaytothestables.Heranabrushoverhismare’sglisteningwintercoatthathadgrownthickanddark.Hepickedupeachhoof,inspectingtheshoe,thensaddledherwhileshefinishedheroats.
“Allright,girl,let’sgoforaride.”Heslippedthebridleinplaceandledherfromthestall.
“Morning,Mr.
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Lévesque,”saidMarioasheforkedhayintoeachstall.“Everyone’soutandaboutearlytoday.Bartookoffafootaboutanhourago,thenStoneynottoolongafterhim.Nowyou.Seemseveryonewantstoleavetownthismorning.Imightaswellleave,too.Gosomeplacewarm.Naples...orVenice.”
“Goodmorning,Mario,”saidHughes,swingingupintothesaddle.
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“Didyouwakeuponthewrongsideofthebedthismorning?Feelingalittlehomesick,maybe?”
“Italyhasn’tbeen‘home’inalongtime.I’mjusttiredofmytoesbeingcold.That’sall.Ihatecoldtoes.Theyputmeinasourmood.”Marioleanedagainstahorsestall,frowning.
“Iknowwhatyoumean,sir.Ihatethem,too.”Hughesmadeamentalnote
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tobuyMarioawarmpairofsocksfirstchancehegot.Then,reininghismarearoundandoutthedoor,healmostcollidedhead-firstintoStoney’shorse.
“Whoa,”Hughessaid,drawingbackthereins.
BarleighslidoffthebacksideofStoney’sgelding,hoppingtotheground.“Morning,Hughes.Mario.”Sheduckedintothebarn,grabbedapitchfork,andthen
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busiedherselfwithfillingtheremainingemptytroughswithhay.
“Morning,Bar,”Hughessaid.“Stoney,howareyou?Allthatpieandwhiskeylastnightkeepyouawakewithnightmares?”
“Asamatteroffact,sir,Isleptlikeababy,”saidStoney,dismountingandleadinghishorseintothebarn.
“Likeababy,eh,”
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saidMario,standinginthedoorway.“Sowhat’dyoudo?Cry,thenpissandshitthebed?Havefuncleaningthatmessup.”
“Ain’tyoueverthecomedian?”Stoneyslidthesaddleoffhishorse,settingitonthestandinfrontofthestall,thenloopedthebridleoverthehorn.
“Bar,putdownthatpitchforkandgogetsomebreakfast,”saidMario.
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“Don’tstraytoofar.Bereadytojumpandride.SupposedtobeurgentmailcomingoutofCaliforniaonthisrun.”
“CanItakethisrun?”Stoneyasked.“Youdon’thavetopaymeextra—Ijustneedtogetoutofhereforawhile.Clearmyhead.”
MariolookedatStoneywithaconcernedexpression.“Youallright,son?”
“Fine,sir.Ijustmiss
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myoldeastboundroute.Idon’tgettorunitoftenenough.Notthatitmatters—thewestboundrunisfine,too.Youknowhowitis.Amanfeelsnostalgiceverynowandthen—wantstorevisithisbeginnings.Thatallrightwithyou,Bar?”heasked,agrinspreadingacrosshisface.
“Ifthat’swhatyouwanttodo,Stoney,it’sallrightbyme,”Barleigh
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answered.“I’mgladwegotthat
settled,”saidMario,hurryingoffwithhispitchforkinhand.Then,shoutingoverhisshoulder,“LikeItoldBar,Stoney,don’tstraytoofar.Bereadytojumpandride.”
“I’mheadedtothefoothills,Bar.Iwouldn’tturndownsomecompany,”saidHughes.“WeatherthisniceinNovemberwon’tlastlong.”
Theireyesmetfora
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briefsecondbeforesheturnedaway.“Idon’tknow.I—”
“Go.It’saprettydayforaride,”saidStoney.“Here,I’llresaddlethisgeldingforyou.He’sprobablywonderingwhysuchashortridethismorning,anyway.”
“Icansaddlemyownhorse,thanks.”Barledthegeldingoutofthestallandtiedhimtothegrooming
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post.“What?YouwanttotreatmelikeI’myourgoddamnedlittlesister?”Shespatontheground,thenwithherfreehandreadjustedhercrotch.LookingatHughes,shespatagainforgoodmeasure.
StoneygaveanervouslaughandlookedfromBarleightoHughes.“Hey,Ididn’tmeannothing.Justoffering.”
“What’sgotyouso
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riled?”askedMario,walkingbackinwithapitchforkfulloffreshhay.“IsawyoudanceandgetakissfromDorthealastnightatthepie-eatingcontest.Youshouldbeinfinespiritsthismorning.”
“MaybeBar’sinpoorspiritsbecausethat’sallhegot,adanceandakiss.That’sstillbetterthanwhatsomeofuspoorbastardswenthomewith.Saddleup.Let’sride.”Hughesspurredhishorse
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awayfromthebarn,anticipatingBarleighwouldfollow.Whenheheardthesoundofhoofbeatsbehindhim,heeasedhismareintoatrot,pointinghertowardthecraggy,snow-cappedmountainsthatflankedthesleepingcity.
Silencelingeredbetweenthemastheyrode.Theclearair,bluesky,andmildtemperatureinducedavarietyofbirdsintoventuring
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outoftheirnests,thebirdsseeminghappytofillthequietspacewithchatteringandchirping.
Astheynearedtheturn-offforthepassagetothesecretcave,Barleighbroketheirsilence.“Adanceandakississtillbetterthanwhatsomeofuspoorbastardswenthomewith?Whatwereyouexpectingtogohomewith?Akissyoustolefrommeinadarkalley,whichyou
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ledmedownunderunknownpretense—pluswhatelse?”
Hughesthrewbackhisheadandlaughed.“Iwasplayingalong,Miss‘IcansaddlemyownhorsebecauseI’mnotyourgoddamnedlittlesister’orwhateveritwasyousaidtoStoney.Andfortherecord,Ididn’tstealthatkissinthealley.Itookit.Takingandstealingaretwodifferentthings.”
“Ohreally?Your
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semanticslessonimpressesme.”Barleighleanedbackinhersaddleasthehorsesbegantheirdescentintothecanyon,lesseningtheweightherhorsewasbearingforwardofhiswithers.
Thesteeppassageintothecaverequiredtheirpreciseattention,andconversationwassparse,thesnowmeltandrefrozengroundcreatingatreacherouspathway.Rocksandgravelslippedunderfoot,
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andbothhorsesdroppedtheirnosestotheground,carefultopickandchoosetheirwaytosafefooting.
“Weshouldpicnichereinthegladeinsteadofinthecave,”saidBarleigh,oncetheyreachedthehiddenclearing.Shedismountedandloopedthereinsoveralow-hangingbranch.
“OutintheopenwhereyoufeelsafethatIwon’ttakeadvantageof
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you?”HughesstoodnexttohismareandstudiedBarleigh,hisambereyescloudedanddark.
Barleighcockedherheadandlookedathim,aconfusedexpressiononherface.
“Ididn’tpromiseyoulastnightthatIwouldn’twanttokissyou.IpromisedyoulastnightthatIwouldn’tkissyouagain.Ikeepmypromises.”Heturnedaway,
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thememoryofthetelegraphaboutLeighsellefloodinghismind,andhecouldn’tlookatBarleigh.Hekepthispromises,allright,eventhosehehatedkeeping.
“Imeantoutintheopenwherethesky’ssoblueandtheweather’sfineforapicnic.What’swrong?”Barleighsteppedforwardandputherhandonhisarm.“Areyouallright?”
Hestaredatherhand
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onhisarm—wantedtopickitup,tokisseachfinger,tonotstoptherebuttokissherpalm,thelengthofherarm,tokisshiswaytohermouthandmore.“Yes,I’mallright.”
Hepattedherhandlikeonewouldachild’s,thenmoveditaway.“Apicnichereinthegladeiswhatwe’lldo,then.”Reachingforhissaddlebag,helifteditfrombehindthecantle,settingiton
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theground,removingthecontentsandarrangingtheplatesandfoodontheunrolledblanket.
“Yousurepackafancypicnic,”saidBarleigh,pickingupthelinennapkinandthecutcrystalglass.
“GrowingupinNewOrleans,mymotheralwaysservedafancybrunchonSundays,completewithFrenchchampagne.She’dsplashalittleorangejuicein
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itsometimes,forcolor.Here.”HehandedBarleighacrystalglass,thebrushofherfingeragainsthissettinghisnervesonedge.
Barleighsipped.“Mmm.Wonderful.NewOrleans?Isthatwhereyou’refrom?Ifyourecallmesayinglastnight,mygrandfatherspenttimethere.”
“Irecallalotaboutlastnight.Àvotresanté.”Hughesliftedhisglassand
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sipped.“Toyourhealth.”“Àvotresanté.Are
yousureitdoesn’tmean‘let’schangethesubject’?”
Hughessmiledather.“IgrewupinNewOrleans.MyfatherownsLévesqueSugarcaneandShipping.HebuiltLévesquePlantationwiththeengineeringplansfromThomasJefferson’sMonticellohome.Besidessugarcane,heraisesthoroughbreds.”
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“Tellmemore,please.”Barleighsippedherchampagne.
“Yes,ma’am,”saidHughes,refillingtheirglasses.“Actually,thehorsesaremymother’sdoing.Fatherallowshertoraisethem.Ihaveatwinbrother,John-Pierre,who’stakenovermostdutieswiththebusinesses.IleftNewOrleanswhenIwaseighteenorso—becameaTexas
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Ranger.Now,Idocertainjobsforthegovernmentthatnooneelsewill.That’smystoryinanutshell.Now,maywecallatrucefortheday?Youseemangrywithme.”
“I’mnotangry.I’mnervousthatifmysecretgetsfoundoutandIlosethisjob—”
“Thenwhat?What’stheworstthatcouldhappen?”Hehandedheraplate.“Sorry,thefoodisalittle
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sparse.”“Thankyou.”She
nibbledonasmallpieceofsmokedbacon.“Theworst?IgobacktoTexaswithoutenoughmoneytopaythetaxesonmyranch.ThenthebankforeclosesandIlosethedeed.Itoldyou.I’mnotdressingupandpretendingtobeaboyforthethrillofthemasquerade.ThisisnotagameI’mplaying.”
“Thatpokerstakeyou
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wonlastnightisn’tenough?How’sthatcutonyourhead,bytheway?”HereachedouttotouchitbutBarleighdrewback.
“It’sfine,thanks,”shesaid,pullingawayfromhistouch.“Themoneyhelpsagreatdeal,butno,notenough.”
“Howmucharethetaxes?I’llgiveyoutherestofthemoney.”Hughesshiftedontheblanketandrefilledthe
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champagneglasses.“Why?Because
you’reawealthyplantationowner?Howmanyslavesdoesittaketorunasugarcaneandthoroughbredplantation?Doyourslavesworkatyourshippingyards,too?”Shedownedtheremainderofthechampagneinonegulp,coughingatthestinginginherthroatasitwentdown.
Hughesleanedback
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onhiselbows,bitinghistongue,tryingtokeephisangerincheck.“MyfatheristheownerofLévesqueSugarcaneandShipping.Don’tjudgemebasedonwhatyouthinkyouknow.”
Hesettledasteadygazeonher,clenchingandunclenchinghisjawatthememoryofhisfathershovingapocketfulofmoneyathim—tellinghimnottocomeback.He’dlearnedmoreof
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howtobeamanfromOkwara,theplantationslave,thanfromhisfather.
“Iwaswrongtojudge.Theideaofyougivingmemoneythatwasearnedoffthebacksofslavessetmeoff.Pleaseforgiveme.”
“Forgivenandforgotten.Butboy,yousurecangofromafriendshiptrucetofiringwithbothbarrelsintheflashofaneye.”
“Myfathersaidmy
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fierytemperwasagiftfrommymother.Iwouldn’tknow,firsthand.ShediedwhenIwasborn.”Barleighshruggedhershoulders.
“I’msorry.”Hughesdrewinadeepbreath,thenletitoutslowly.
“Besidesthetaxes,there’salsothematterofrebuildingthehouse,thebarn.Animalstoreplace....”Barleighshuddered,startedtosaysomethingmore,andthen
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lookedaway.Layingonthepicnic
blanketwatchingher,Hughestriedtofollowhergazebutitledtonowhereinparticularthathecoulddiscern.Hearingherspeakthosewords,sayingthathermotherdiedinchildbirth,madehimsicktohisstomach.Hisjawclinched,hiseyesdarkened,buthewouldn’tallowhertoseehisreaction—hewaswellversedintheartofsecrecy.
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Hewaitedinpatientsilenceforhertogatherherthoughts,hopingshewouldletdownalittleofthewallshe’dbuiltbetweenthem—thebarriershe’dfashionedbetweenherandtherestoftheworld.
Shelookedbackathim,herbrowfurrowed,andsaidinsuchasoftvoicethathehadtositupandleanforwardtohear.“AmidnightIndianraid....Thenightof
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theComanchemoon.Birdie,Papa,andUncleJack,allwerekilled.AuntWinnieandIhidinthegoatsheddowninthecellarwithmynewbabysister,Starling.Thatnight,themoonwassobig—sobright.Beautiful,yetterrifying.ItspotlightedaswarmofComancheupontheBrazosRiverridge.IsawthemjustasclearlyasIknewtheysawus.”
Hughesputhishands
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onherarms,turninghermoretofacehim.“Thatnight,whatelsedoyouremember?”
“IrememberPapabeingworriedabouttheworseningskirmishesbetweentheReservationIndiansandthesettlersinthearea.ButPapasaiditwasn’ttheReservationIndiansdoingtheattacking.”Barleigh’svoicequivered.
“Whodidhesayitwas?”askedHughes.
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“HesaiditwaseitherwhitemendoingitandblamingitontheReservationIndians,oritwasQuanahParker’sbandofComanche.TherehadbeenreportsofQuanahraidinginthearea,accordingtoPapa’sfriend,CaptainGoodnight.YoumightknowCharlieGoodnight.He’saTexasRanger,too.”
“He’safriend.”ColdsweatbeadedonHughes’s
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foreheadandhisguttightened.Hesathisplateontheblanketandstood,takingoffhishat,runninghishandsthroughhishair.
ButQuanahParkerwasinSanAntonio.Couldhehavetraveledthatfarinadayortwo?AComancheonhorsebackridinghardcancover250milesormoreintwenty-fourhours,stealingfreshmountsalongtheway.Itwaspossible....
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“Whatareyouthinking?Youlooklikeyou’veseenaghost,”Barleighsaid.
“I’mtryingtofigureoutifQuanahParkercouldhavebeenin—”Hughesstoppedhimself,tryingtorememberifBarleighhadsharedwithhimwhereshewasfrom,orifhewasrememberingitfromhistrackingherdown.
“Beeninwhat?”
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“When,exactly,wastheraidonyourranch?Thedate?And,didyoutellmewhereinTexasyoulived?”
“TheraidhappenedFriday,Septemberthetwenty-seventh.Justaftermidnight.And,no,Ihaven’ttoldyouwhereI’mfrom.MylandisinPaloPinto,ahalfday’sridewestofFortWorthontheBrazosRiver.”
“Whenyousawthemountedwarriorsonthe
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ridge,couldyoumakethemoutclearly?Couldyouseeifthereseemedtobealeader,orchief,andifso,whatcolorwashishorse?”Hughesdrilledhisquestions,hiswordscomingrapid-fire.
“Thereweresomany,welloverahundred.I’mcertaintherewasaleaderwhogavethesignaltoattack.Idon’trecallthecolorofhishorse.White,maybe?”
Hughespacedback
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andforth,thenwalkedtowherethehorsesstoodtied.Herestedhisforeheadagainsthismare’sneck,breathinginthewoodsy,familiarsmellofasweatyhorse.Thatsmellalwaystookhimbacktohisfirstmemory.Itwasthesmellofhischildhoodandthehourshespentracinghisponythroughthemossywoodsofhishome.
“Damnittohell,”hesaid,hisboomingvoiceand
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hisfistspoundingagainstthesaddle,causinghishorsetonickerandshyaway.
ThewordsoftheobeseblackjackdealerinSanAntonio,JerryAllsup,ranginhishead:“Markmywords,butyou’llregretnotkillingthatsonofabitchwhileyouhadthechance.”Andhewasright.HughesregrettednothavingkilledQuanahParker,evenifhiswarriorswouldhavefilledhimwiththeir
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arrows.“Hughes?”Heturnedandsawher
lookingathimwithfearandconcerninhercat-likeeyesthatlookedlikeLeighselle’s,exceptBarleigh’swereblue,notgreen.Thetiltofherhead,theslopeofhernose,thepointofherchin,herfinecheekbones,hergracefulnessevenwhiledressedlikeaboy,grippedhisheart.
“Youlooksomuch
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like...”Heranahanddownhisface,shuttingoffthethought.
“Ilooksomuchlikewhat?”sheasked,standing,movingcautiouslycloser.
“Nothing,Barleigh.YouremindmeofsomeoneIknow.Endofstory.Webettergo.Ihavealongridetomorrow.”
Hebeganrollingtheplatesandglassestogetherintheblanket,tossingthefood
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aside,throwingouttherestofthechampagne.Oneofthecrystalglassesbangedagainstaplateandsplinteredintoaspider’swebofcracks.
“Goddamnit.”Hethrewthebrokenglassagainstarock.Then,pickinguptheotherglass,hethrewit,too,sendingshardsoffine,leadedGermancrystalflyingintotheair.
Barleighplacedagentlinghandonhisarm.
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“Hey.Hey.Easy.Letmehelpyouwithputtingthesethingsaway.What’swrong?”
Hughesshruggedoffherhand.“No.Don’t.Just....Pleasegetonyourhorse.I’minahurry.”
Therewasalettertowrite.HewouldbegLeighselletostopthisdamnedlie—hecouldn’tdoitanymore.IfBarleighknewthatshehadamother—thathermotherhadpaidthetaxes
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onherland—Barleighwouldgohomeandwouldstopthisfoolish,dangerousmasqueradeshewasplaying.
“Hughes,whathaveIdone?What’swrong?”Barleighfollowedhimasheslunghissaddlebagoverthecantle,tyingitinplacewiththeleatherlatigo.“Lookatme.WhathaveIdone?”Shestoodclosebehindhim,waitingforananswer.
Turningaround,
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Hugheslookeddownandintohereyes,whichwerethecolorofthesky.Hereachedouthishand,strokedhercheek,rubbinghisthumbacrossasmudgeofdirt.Then,liftingherbangs,hecheckedonhercutforehead,tracingaroundthebandagewithhisfinger.
“Idon’tknowhowintheworldyouhaveeveryonefooledintothinkingyou’reaboy.You’resopretty.So
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verypretty,”hesaid,asadtonetohisvoice.
“Peoplebelievewhattheywanttobelieve,orwhatthey’retoldtobelieve.WhathaveIdonetoangeryou?Something’schanged.”
“You’vedonenothing.I’vejustcometotheconclusionthatyou’vebeenrightallalong.Ishould’veneverkissedyou.Idon’thavethetimeortheluxurytoworryaboutyou,”hesaid,a
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firmsettohisjaw.“Theluxury?Ididn’t
askyoutoworryaboutme.Youappointedyourselftothatrole.Youdon’thavetospeaktomeinsucharudefashion.Youdon’thavetospeaktomeatall,asfarasI’mconcerned.WhatI’mtryingtoaccomplishwouldhavefarfewerrisksifyouandInevercrossedpathsagain.”Shecrossedherarmsagainstherchest.
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“Becarefulwhatyouaskfor.”Heturnedandswungintothesaddle,guidinghismareupthesteepgradeandawayfromthecave.
Theridebackintotownwasevenmoresilentthantherideout.HughesrodeaheadofBarleigh,keepinghismareatafasttrot.Eachtimeshecaughtupwithhim,hewouldspeedupjustenoughtomakeitobvious
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thathedidn’twanttoridesidebyside.
*****BarleighreinedhergeldingtoastopattheendoftheroadandwatchedasHughesledhismareintothebarn,henotoncelookingbacktoseeifshewasbehind.Shehadwantedhimtoleaveheralone.Shehadpushedhimaway—toldhimtoneverkissheragain,toneverspeaktoheragain.Sowhydidshefeel
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likeherheartwasshatteringlikethecrystalglasseshe’dsmashedagainsttheboulders?
Minuteslater,shewatchedasheleftcarryinghissaddlebagsinonehand,somethingclutchedintheother,andheadedfortheSaltLakeHouseacrossthestreet.Barleighsqueezedherheelsandclucked,“Comeon,boy,walkon.”Thegeldingcomplied,respondingtothe
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gentlecue.“Mr.Lévesquewas
sureinafoulmood,”saidBigBrodyashesweptthecenteraisleofthebarn.“Didn’tsaynothingtome.HescribbledaquickmessagefortheCarsonCitymail,askedMariotohaveCarsonCitytelegraphittoSanAntonio,thenhegrabbedabottleofwhiskeyandleft.”
Sothat’swhathewascarrying.
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“Ican’tsay.Werodetogetherforawhile,thenhetookoffonhisown.Saidsomethingaboutabigjobtomorrow.”Barleighfinishedcurryingthegeldingandputhiminhisstallwithafreshpailofwaterandscoopofoats.“Stoneyalreadygone?”
“Herodeoutafewsecondsago.That’shisdusthangingonthewind.”BigBrodynoddedoverhisshouldertowardthewide,
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doubledoorsthatwereslidopen,allowingfreshairintothebarn.
BarleighpeereddowntheroadbutStoneywasoutofsight.“Abitlateleaving,wasn’the?”
“Mailwaslatecomingin.Someproblembackdowntheline,don’tknowwhatforsure.Say,justsoyouknow....”BigBrodyloweredhisvoice.“MarioorderedmetotakethatMexicansombrero
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ofhisandburnit.Today.Youmightwanttohideitsomeplace.”
“Mariocangotohell,”saidBarleigh,givingBrodyathankyounod.Agoodspitonthegroundwascalledfor.
“I’vebeentohell,”saidMario,walkinginthedoor,slappingBarleighontheback.“Hell’slivingforeighty-sevendaysinthesteerageofacargoshipand
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fightingoverwhogetsthefattestratforyouronemealoftheday.It’sseeingyourmotherandfather’sbodiestossedoverboardalongwiththerestofthestinkingtrash.Hell’sbeingtenyearsoldandaloneinNewYorkCity,someonestealingyourshoesoffyourfeetwhileyouslept,wakinguphungry,pickingthroughhorseshitwithyourbarehands,searchingfortheundigestedoats.That’smy
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versionofhell.”BigBrodyrolledhis
eyesandshruggedhisshoulders,andthenwentbacktosweeping.
“Ididn’tmeanthat,Mario,”saidBarleigh.“Yes,sir,thatsoundslikehelltome,too.”
“Don’tmindme.”Mariogaveadismissingwaveofhishands.“Mytoesarecold.So,what’dyoudo,Bar?Lévesquecameback
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sullenandlookingforagooddrunk.”
“Ididn’tdoanything,”shesaid,alittletoodefensivelyshethought.
“Maybehe’slonelyforhisladyfriendinSanAntoniothathe’swritingto,”saidMariowithamischievousgrin.“Maybehistoesandotherbodypartsneedwarmed.”Mariolaughed.
“Maybeit’sbecauseI
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toldhimhecouldn’thaveDorthea,thatIwantedherallformyself.”Barleighspatonthegroundandleftthebarn,thesoundsoflaughterfromMarioandBigBrodyfollowingheroutthedoor.
Barleighcrossedthewidestreetasshemadeherwaytowardthehotel,wantingnothingmorethantogobacktobed,crawlunderthecovers,pullthesheetoverherhead,andhibernatefor
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therestoftheday.ShemissedAuntWinnie—missedStarling.ShemissedTexas.Shewantedtogohome,evenifhomewasjustaburnedpieceofland.
“Hey,watchwhereyou’rewalking,”saidagruffvoice,reelingfromthesurpriseimpactoftwopeoplecolliding.Thespeechwasslurred,theclothesreekingwithalcohol,dirt,sweat,andurine.
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“Excuseme,I’msosorry,”saidBarleigh.“Iguessmyfeetdidn’tknowwheretobe.”
“Inaholyplaceofworshipiswhereyoushouldbe,”saidtheoldman,straighteninghissour-smellingcoat.“It’sSundaymorning.”
“Andwhereshouldyoubethen?”askedBarleigh.
“That’snoneofyourbusiness.Butifyoucould
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spareafewcoinstocovermybreakfast,I’llforgetaboutyourrudebehavior.”Thestinkingsuitheldouthishand.
Barleighfishedaroundinherpocketsandcameoutwithsomesparechange,handingitovertotheoldman.“Enjoyyourbreakfast.I’llforgetaboutyourrudebehavior,too.”
“Thankyou,miss.Godblessyou.”
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Barleighstoppedinhertracksandstaredintotheoldman’swatery,bloodshoteyes.“Whatdidyousay?”
“Isaidthankyou,miss,andGodblessyou.Thatwasall.Youain’tgoingtomaketroubleforme,areyou?”
“No.Notrouble.Blessings,orwhatever,toyoutoo.”Barleightossedhimanothercoinandwentintothehotel.
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Thankyou,Miss?Miss?WhatthehellamIdoinghere?
Theroomwasdark,quiet,thefourbunkbedsthatBigBrodyandYatessharedalongwiththenewstockhandlers,LarsandLiam,wereempty.Thetwosinglebeds,hersandStoney’s,wereemptyaswell.Witheveryonegone,shehadtheroomtoherselfforachange.Nohavingtolayherelisteningto
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fartingandbelching—nodisgusting,raunchyhumoraboutwomen’sgenitalia,andthenpretendingtolaugh.
Barleighlayacrossherbead,stretchingoutoverthetopofthecovers,enjoyingthequiet.Shekickedoffherboots,loosenedthecordonhershirt,anduntuckedtheends,gettingcomfortable.
Sheturnedherheadandlookedatthewall
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betweenherandHughes’sroom,tryingtoenvisionwhathewasdoing.Wouldhebelyingonhisbedwithhisbootskickedoff?Withhisshirtoff?Wouldhebesittingbythewindow,sippinghiswhiskey?Whywouldheneedwhiskeythisearlyintheday?Whywashekindoneminute,thenrudeandsullenthenext?Washemissingsomeone—hislady-loveinSanAntonio?
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WhydoIcareaboutanyofthis?
Barleighslidoutofbedandtiptoedovertothewall,pressingherearagainstit,tryingtomakeoutthemuffledsoundsshewashearingcomingfromtheotherside.Sheheardvoicesandwonderedwhohewasspeakingto.Washetalkingtohimself?Didhetalkinhissleep?Shewonderedwhatitwouldbeliketosleepinhis
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bed,tofeelhisnakedbodyagainsthersifshewokeupduringthenight.Shepressedharderagainstthewall,imaginingitwasHughes’sbodyshewasfeelingpressingagainsthersinreturn,likethelastkissfromlastnightinthealley.
ThebedroomdoorswungopenandBigBrodyandLarsstoodinthehallway,Lars’shandonthedoorknobastheyenteredtheroom.
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“Whatareyoudoing,Bar?EavesdroppingonLévesque?”askedBigBrody.
Barleighjumpedawayfromthewall,kickingthebedframeintheprocess.“Ouch!Fuckthathurt.”Shebouncedaroundononefoot,holdingthebigtoeoftheother.“Goddamnit,yousurprisedme.”
“Wecanseethat.WhywereyoulisteninginonMr.Lévesque’sroom?”Big
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Brodyasked,lookingsuspicious.
“I,uh...IthoughtImighthaveheardawoman’svoiceintherewithhim.Ijustwantedtoknowwhatitsoundedlikewhenamanandawoman,youknow,mightbe,uh...”
BigBrodybeltedoutalaugh.“Youmeanyou’veneverbeenwithawoman?Youdon’tknowwhatawomansoundslikewhen
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she’sinthethroesofpassion?”
“Ididn’tmeananyharm.”Barleighsatonthesideofherbedmassaginghersoretoe.“Whyareyoulookingatmelikethat?Just—justgofuckoff,allright?”
BigBrodyandLarslookedateachother,thenatBarleigh.Asifoncue,bothhadherbyeacharm,forcingherbootsonherfeet,grabbinghercoat,dragging
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heroutthedoor.“Whatareyoudoing?
Putmedown.”Barleighstruggled,butitwasnouse.“Isaidletmego.”
“Let’sallgofuckoff,”laughedLars.“Let’sallgofuckoffatthewhorehouse.”
“ExactlywhatIwasthinking,”saidBigBrody,laughingevenharder.“Bar,youwon’thavetowonderanymorewhatawoman
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soundslike.You’llexperienceitfirsthandandthenbethankingusfromheretotheothersideofnextSunday.”
Hughes’sdoorcrackedopenandhestuckhisheadoutintothehallway.“What’sallthecommotion?”
“We’vedecidedtotakealittlewalkovertoseesomeofMissMaeve’sgirls.Barseemstohaveacuriousstreakthismorningthatneeds
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satisfying,”saidLars.“Ifyou’renotalreadysoengaged,pleasefeelfreetojoinus.”
“That’saninvitationIdon’tbelieveIshouldpassup.Givemeaminutetopullonmyboots.”Hughesslammedthedoor.
“Thosewomendon’tworkonSundaymornings,”saidBarleigh.“Dothey?”
“Inthistown?That’swhenthey’rethebusiest,”
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saidBigBrody.“AmenandOh,God,
Oh,God,”saidLars.*****
FrenchperfumeandsweetcigarsmokescentedtheairinthedimlylitroomsatMissMaeve’sBoardingHouse.Girlsinscantycostumesandinvariousstagesofundressloungedaboutonbillowypillows,somewearinggaudyamountsofrougeandlipstick,somewearingnone
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atall.TheoneswearingnoneatallsaddenedBarleighthemost—theylookedsoyoung,fresh,andunspoiled.
“Here’ssomethingforyou,MissMaeve,”saidLars,handingherasilverdollar.“Picksomeoneniceforourfriend,Bar.It’shisfirsttimegoingupstairs.Someonenice,likeBerta.”LarsandBigBrodywinkedateachother,thenstrolledovertothepillowedfloorandselected
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rougedandlipstickedgirlsfortheirownpleasures.
HugheshandedMaeveafive-dollargoldpiece.“BuffaloBertamightbealittlefrighteningforwhatwewanttoaccomplishtoday.It’sBar’sfirsttime.Heshouldhavethemostexperiencedwomanhere.MissMaeveherself.”
“Anythingforyou,Hughes,”saidMissMaeve,battinghereyelasheslikea
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shyschoolgirl.SheheldoutahandforBarleigh.“Comewithme,boy.Butwhenwe’redone,noonecancallyouaboyanylonger.”
Barleighlaughedoutloud.
HughestookMissMaevebyherelbowandpulledheraside,whisperingsomethingtoher,handingheranotherfive-dollargoldpiece.MissMaevesurreptitiouslyglancedat
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Barleighforameresecond,noddingasHughesspoke,smiling,andnoddingagain.
“Myspecialservice,whyyesofcourse.I’dbedelightedtogiveBarmyextraspecialservice,”MissMaevesaidloudenoughforeveryonetohear,thenlookedatBarleighandwinked.
Anhourlater,asBarleighandMaevewerereadytostepoutfromherroom,MissMaevepinched
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hercheekstomakethemappearflushwithcolor,mussedherhair,andthrewalacyrobeoverhershoulders.
“Whatapleasureitwastomeetyou,Barleigh.Imustsay,thiswasthemostsurprisingmorningI’vehadinalongtime.And,themostpleasureI’vehadearningmoney,justbysharingalittle‘girltalk.’Don’tworry,honey,yoursecret’ssafewithme.”
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“Thankyou,MissMaeve.Whatanenlighteninghour.Ihaven’thadanotherwomantotalktoinawhile.IhopeIdidn’tshockyouwithallmyquestions.”
“MissMaeve’snotshockedbymuch.”Thewomangaveaheartylaugh.
“Growingupwithoutamother,I’veonlyhadmyimaginationtoguidemeabouttheintimaciesbetweenamanandawoman.”
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Barleighblushed,recallinginvividdetailsomeofMissMaeve’sexplicitdescriptions.“I’llgivesomethoughttowhatyousaidaboutHughes—thewayamanlikehimcangofromkissingmeoneminutetoalmostkillingtwomenthenext.”
“Itwasn’tjustaboutHughes,itwasaboutmostmen.Thegoodoneshaveastrongneedtoprotecttheweakersex.Youcan’tfightit
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oraskthemtogoagainstit.It’sintheirnature.EspeciallyforamanlikeHughes—it’ssacredtohisnature.Youcanuseittoyouradvantage.Notmanipulatively,butfairly,whereeachonegetswhattheyneed.”
“But,Idon’tknowwhatIneed.”
“Thenyoukeeplookinguntilyoudiscoverit.Thetrickistonevergiveuptillyoufindit,honey.You’ll
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dojustfine.Now,speakingaboutallmen,lookslikeyourbuddiesarewaitingforyou.I’llputonashowofit.Watchthis.”Shepinchedhercheeksagain,re-fluffedherhair,andproceededtoenthralleveryonewithabreathlessstoryofpure,sensualdelight.
“Well,well,congratulations,Bar.Whowould’vethoughtalittleguylikeyouhaditinyoutotakecareofawomanlikeMiss
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Maeve?”BigBrodyslappedBarleighontheback,alookofadmirationonhisface.
“Andforawholehour,too,”addedLars.“Myfirsttime?Ihadmypantsbackupandcinchedinlessthanfiveminutes.Or,didIevengetthemallthewaydownbeforeIfinished?”Histhoughtsandwordstrailedoff.
“LarsandIwanttostayhereawhile,seewhat
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othertroublewecanscareup,thenmaybegoovertoWhiskeyStreet.Wanttostaywithus?Romeo?”BigBrodylaughed,slappingBarleighonthebackagain.“Nowthatyou’vegotyourfirstoneunderyourbelt,youmightaswellgiveBuffaloBertaaride.”
“Thanks,butno.I’llwaitforHughesto,uh,finish,tocome,touh,comedownthestairs,thenI’llheadback
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tothehouse.”Barleighlookedupthestairs,hopingtoseeHughes.
“Oh,Mr.Lévesquedidn’tstay,”saidoneoftheyoung,fresh-facedgirlswearingnomakeupandloungingonthepileofpillows.“Hesaidhehadotherimportantworktotakecareof.”Shepouted,tryingtoactaffronted.
“Youtwohavefun,”Barleighsaid,givinga
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knowingsmile.“IthinkI’llgohibernateawhile.Amanneedshisrestafterallthatexcitement.”
AfterthankingMissMaeveagain,BarleighwalkedbacktotheSaltLakeHousealone.Withhandsinpockets,shepassedthelargeplate-glasswindowinfrontofthemercantilestore.Shesteppedbackandstudiedherreflection,wonderingwhatHughessawwhenhelooked
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ather.Shesawrowelled
spursstrappedaroundtall-heeled,knee-highboots,theblackleatherpolishedbutworn.Bluetweeddungareestuckedintoherboottops.Yellowbuckskinshirtthreadedupthefrontclosurewithaleathercord.Yellowbandanatiedaroundherneckinplaceofapearlnecklace.Heavy,oil-skinslickerlinedinthicksheep’swoolthat
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hungtotheground.Colt.45strappedtoherhipthatshe’dlearnednottoleaveathome.Brown,short-brimmed,short-crownedwesternhatshetighteneddownwithasturdylatigoandasilverconcho,theconchoforshowbecauseshelikedthewayitlooked.Boy-shorthairinneedofacutandacomb.Fringedleatherglovestokeephercallousedhandswarm.Animageoftheweakersexinneedofa
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man’sprotection?Hardly.Barleightookastep
closertothewindowandcontemplatedherappearanceamomentlonger,takinginherexpression,ponderingthefacestaringback.Plain.Nomakeup.Liketheyoung,fresh-facedgirlsatMissMaeve’swholookedliketheydidn’tbelongintheirjobs,either.SheturnedandwalkedawaytowardtheSaltLakeHouse,feelingtiredand
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melancholy.Howfortunate,
though,Ionlyhavetoridehorsesforaliving.
*****SomeonebangingonthedoorawokeBarleighfromhersleep,theinsistentpoundinggrowinglouder.“Wakeup.Areyouinthere?”
Wherewaseveryoneelse?Barleighfeltdisoriented.Normally,atleastoneotherriderwassleeping
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inthebunkroomatanygiventime.Sheshuffledtothedoorinherredlongjohns,thewarmthermalunderwearherbasicuniformwhennotinridingattire.
“Coming.Holdon.”Softlightfilteringinthewindowaroundthecurtainsindicateditwasnotyetevening.Aglanceattheclockshowedittobehalfpastfourintheafternoon—she’dalmostslepttheday
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away.“Yes,whatisit?”She
openedthedooracrackandpeekedoutside.
Hugheswasslumpedagainstthewallindisheveledclothes,hishairamess,afiveo’clockshadowpepperinghisjaw.Toomanywhiskeysetchedthelinesonhisface.Shewantedtojumpintohisarms,ortopullhimintotheroom,butsheremindedherselfthatthat’snotwhata
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PonyExpressriderwoulddo.
“Lévesque.Youlooklikeshit.”
“Thankyou.Youlookdelicious,”hewhispered.
“You’redrunk,”shesaid,annoyed.
“You’reastute.”HeheldupabottleofBaerBrothers’whiskeyalreadythreequartersemptyandtookanotherswig.
“Whyareyouhere?”
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“Iwenttothebarntocheckonmymare—”
“Evendrunk,yourememberedyourpriorities,beforepassingout.Goodforyou.”Shesteppedback,closingthedoor.
“Listentome,”Hughessaid,brushingasideherremark,hisbootforcingthedooropen.Inaloudvoice,speechslurred,hesaid,“Stoney...he’smissing.Hishorsecamebacktothebarn
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withouthim.Themochila’sgone,too.Therewasblood—abloodyhandprintonthehorse’sneck.”Hughesleanedagainstthedoorframeforbalance.
“Oh,dearGod.Thatcan’tbe.”Barleighrushedintotheroom,pullingonherclothes.Shoutingoverhershoulder,sheasked,“Istheresomeoneoutlookingforhim?”
“MariosentBig
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BrodyandBrody’slittlebrother—what’shisname,Yates?”Hughescalledfromthehallway.
“Right,Yates.”Barleighranoutthedoor,pushingpastHughes,sendinghimspinninglikeatop.Assheleft,shegrabbedStoney’sMexicansombrerofromthehatrack,puttingitonforgoodluck.
*****Hughessteadiedhimself
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againstthewallandstumbledtowardhisdoor.NoddingtothetwomenpeeringfromoutoftheirdoorwaythatwasacrossthehallfromthePonyExpressroom,heraisedhisbottleinaninvitation.
“Evening,gents.Shareatoast?”Heslungbackanothergulpandheldoutthebottle.
Thedoorclosed,thelockclickinginplace.
Insidehisroom,
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Hughesemptiedtheteafromthewhiskeybottlebackintothesilverteaserver.Then,herefilledthewhiskeybottlewithitsoriginalcontentsofBaerBrothersfromhiscanteen,minusthetwoshotshe’dallowedhimselfafterthemorning’sridewithBarleigh.ThethirdandfourthshotsmissingfromthebottlehadhelpedtosteadyhimafterheawokefromanunrestfulnapandafitfuldreamofQuanah
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ParkerengagedinabloodyraidonaNorthTexashomestead.
Afterrunningaquickrazoracrosshisfaceandacombthroughhishair,hepulledonhisuniformofthenight:blacktrousers,blackshirt,vest,andtopcoat,blackboots,blackgloves,andblackhat.
Lookingathisimageinthemirror,hetoldhimself,“Youdon’thavetheluxuryof
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worryingabouther.Youhaveajobtodo.”
Heslippedoutofthewindow,closingitbehindhim.
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CHAPTERFIFTEEN
NOVEMBER26,1860
AlonefiguredashedfromtheSaltLakeHouseHotel,almostrunningheadlongintoasmallladstandingoutfrontonthesidewalk.HoldinganextraeditionfortheDeseretNews–ThePonyDispatch,theyoungboy,usinga
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rehearseddialogue,calledouttopassersbythattheSouthernsecessionmovementwasgainingmomentum,pointingtotheheadlinesasproof.Inboldtype,thescriptgavedetailofSouthCarolina,Georgia,andMississippicallingforaspecialsessionoflegislaturefortheelectionofdelegatestoasecessionconvention.
Barleighapologizedtotheboyasshespedpast,
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ignoringtheheadlines.“Mario,”sheshouted,
runningintothebarn,tryingtopushdownthepanicrisingfromhergut.“Mario,whereareyou?”
“Overhere.”Hecameoutofastallleadingasmallbrownmare,tackedupandready.“Iknewyou’dbecomingassoonasyougotword.Ican’ttellyounottogo,thoughIwishyouwouldn’t.BrodyandYates
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arealreadyoutlooking.”“Ihaveto.”Barleigh
tookthereinsfromMario.“Don’tforget,you’re
ondutytomorrow.”“Ihaven’tforgotten,”
shesaid,doublecheckingthecinch.
“IsMr.Lévesqueridingwithyou?Iexpectedhe’ddoso,”askedMario,lookingoverBarleigh’sshouldertowardthedoor.
“Lévesqueisdrunk
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offhisass.Hecanbarelywalk,letaloneride.”Barleighsteppedintothesaddle,thereinsheavyinherhands,thehard,oiledleatherstripsbeginningtostiffenasthetemperaturestartedtoslide.
Mariolookedconfused.“Hewashereearlier.Ididn’tnoticehimbeingdrunk.”
“Hewasbeyonddrunk,”shesaid,annoyedagainatthethought.
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“Anyway,whathappensifI’mnotbackbymorning?”
“Whatdoyoumean,ifyou’renotback?”
“I’mnotcomingbackuntilIfindStoney.Whatifittakeslonger?WhatifI—”Shedroppedhergazedowntoherglovedhandsholdingthestiffeningreins,flippingtheleatherhardagainstherpalm.
AtangleofemotionscausedBarleigh’sbreathto
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catch,andshestruggledtokeepherwordseven.ThethoughtofheadingbacktoTexashadbeenplantedinhermind—thenotionofnotridinganymore,ofquittingthePonyExpress.
“AfterIfindStoney,”shesaid,“itmightbeagoodtimeformetoleave—togohome.”
Mariopattedthemareontheneck.“You’lllikeLittleBrownie.She’s
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surefootedandswift.Takeanextrabedrollandanextracanteenofcoffee.Thenicewarmdayweenjoyedtodaywasateaser.There’sanor’easterblowingin.Icanalreadyfeelthechange.”
Hefixedthebugleandbothcanteenstothesaddlehornandtiedthemwiththelatigo,thenputanextracoatinsidethebedroll,reattachingittothecantle.“LarsorLiamcanfillinif
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you’renotbackinthemorning.We’lltalkaboutyougoinghomeafteryoufindStoney.”
“Yes,sir.Thanks,Mario.”
“I’mgladyougotthatdamnedsombreroon.Thatwidebrimwillhelpkeepthesnowoffyou,”hesaid,atwinkleinhiseye.
BarleighgaveMarioasalute,touchingtheedgeofherhandtothesombrero,and
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nodded.“Yes,sir,itwill.”“Becareful,son.”
Mariodrewthebarndoorsclosedagainstthechillingwind.
Reiningthemarearound,Barleighrodeeast,followingStoney’smailroute.Afewstarspokedholesintothedarkeningskyasacold,gustywindfromthenorthspilledovertheWasatchMountains,shakingfromtheskyafewfat
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snowflakesthatfellhardtothegroundlikeround,whitecoins.
ThewayintoParley’sCanyonfeltfamiliar,andLittleBrownieseemedtoknowtheway.Theroutewasclearandsolid,thefootinggood,thepaceeven.Shekeptthemareatafast,steadytrot,listening,callingoutStoney’sname,listeningagain,lookingforanythingoutoftheordinary.
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ThroughEmigrationCanyon,upMountainDellandBigMountainPass,thoughtsofthefirsttimetheyrodeintoSaltLakeplayedacrosshermind,theexcitementsheandStoneyhadfeltatnearingtheendoftheirfirstlongride.Theyhadwhoopedandhollered,puttingonquitetheshowofitforthetravelersintheOverlandStagecomingdownBigMountainPass.
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Likeawildbanshee,Stoney’slustywhoopshadfilledtheair.Wavinghishatatthetravelers,he’ddroppedhishorserightovertheedgeofthemountain,fearless,androdeitdownlikehewasfloatingonarivercurrent.Theexuberantexpressionhe’dhadonhisfacewaspurejoy.Recallingthatday,thatride,hishappiness,asshecoveredthatsamegroundonLittleBrownie,Barleigh
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hardenedherresolvetofindhim.
AtWebberCanyonStation,shecaughtupwithBigBrodyandYates,whohadstoppedtorestandchangehorses.ShehadchangedonceatMountainDellanddecidedtochangeagain,too,eventhoughherpacehadbeenslowandsteady,thehorsenotyetplayedout.
“We’regoingto
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doublebackfromhere,”saidBrody.“TheysayStoneynevermadeitthisfar,thatBigMountainPasswasthelasthecheckedin.I’mridingabitoffthetrailtothenorth;Yatesisridingabitoffthetrailtothesouth.What’syourplan,Bar?”
“I’llmakeafewcirclesaroundWebberStation,maybegoasfarasEchoCanyon,andthencomebackherebymorning,”she
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said.Stoneycouldbeanywhereinbetweenifhewashurt.
ItwasnearmidnightwhenBarleighleftWebberStation,snowfallingnonstopandcoveringthegroundseveralinchesdeepinplaces,deeperwherethedriftsblewagainstrocksandtrees.Thewoolenponchohungfromhershoulders,drapingoverthesaddle,coveringherlegsallthewaydowntoher
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boots.Intheupperelevation,
thesnowwasmorepowderythanwhatfelldowninthevalley,thehorsehavingtopushthroughitinsteadofwalkingoverasoldpack.Thetemperaturedroppedthroughoutthenightuntilitsettlednearzero,hoveringthereuntilmorningwhenthesun’sraysofferedtheairslightwarmth.
Ridingnortheastfrom
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WebberStation,BarleighaimedforthefoothillsoftheRedBluffsthatraninanobtuselineagainstthelevelplaneoftheWebberRiverValley.Fromthere,shecircledaroundtothenorthwest,thencrossedEchoCreekandheadedsouth,makingasweepingcircleoftheicyvalleyasshecurvednortheastagaintoherstartingpoint.
Themooncastaslight
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illuminationacrossthesnow,allowingsomelighttoshineonanotherwisedarknight.Barleighdecidedtomakehercirclewider,goingfurtheroffthetrail,deeperintothetreesandscrubbrush,crisscrossingthecreek,fordingthelow-watercrossingoftheriver.
OnthebankoftheWebberwherethesnowhadyettoaccumulatetomorethanadusting,somethingcaughthereyeasthe
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moonlightglintedagainsttheshapeofonobjectthatcontrastedwithitssurroundings.Dismounting,shebentoverwhatlookedtobeanarrow.Shepickeditup.Theblue-grayflinttipwassmearedwithdriedblood.Tyingitintoherbedroll,sheremountedandspurredherhorsetowardHeadofCanyonStation.
ColonelHill,thestationmaster,wasn’ta
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colonelasfarasanyoneknew,buteveryonecalledhimthatbecausehisfistswerequicktoremindfolksthathepreferredtobeaddressedassuch.ColonelHillhadnotseenorheardofIndiansinthearea,andwassorrytohearaboutStoney.
“Ilikethatboy.Isurehopeyoufindhimallright.Butshouldn’tyoustayputtillmorning?Atleasttillitstopssnowing?”
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“Itcouldsnowfordays,”Barleighsaid,saddlingasmallbutstout,copperycoloredmare.“I’mridingtoCacheCave.”
WhereshehadfoundthearrowontheWebberRiverassherodeoutofEchoCanyon,thelogicalplacetolookforStoneywouldbetoheadtoCacheCave.IfshehadIndianschasingher,that’swhereshe’dtrytogetto.
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“You’llcrossthewatershedbetweentheBearRiverandtheWebberRiver.Theterrainshouldbefrozen.Mostly.Whereit’snot,mightbepatchyquicksand.Becareful,son.”
“Yes,sir.Thankyou,Colonel.”
Ridingoutintheopen,shefeltvulnerable,suspiciousofsounds,jumpyatshadows.Thesnowhadtaperedoffandthemoon
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hunglikeabrightballinthedarksky,withascatteringofcloudsflittingby.Thetreesandscrubhadbecomesparse,andtheflatopengroundbetweenthetworivervalleysleftlittlemeansofprotection.Shekepthereyesontheground,lookingformorearrowsorothersigns,nolongercallingoutStoney’snameforfearsomeoneelsemighthearher,too.
Overhead,thefull
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moonshadowedher,remindingherofthepowersandperilsofitsbeauty—toseeandtobeseen.Shewonderedwhatnamewasgiventothemoonbythepeopleofthemountains.
Barleighwhisperedasongunderherbreath,eachwordforminganicycloudinfrontofherface.“Iseethemoon;themoonseesme.IranawayfromtheCo-man-che.”
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Thegroundsurroundingthewatershedwascrunchyunderfoot,butinseveralplacesherhorse’sbalancefalteredwherethehard-packwasn’tfrozensolid.Theweightoftheanimalbrokethroughthetoplayer,themarelurchedforward,seekingsolidfooting.Dismounting,Barleighwalkednexttothehorse,easingtheanimal’sstrain.
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Shereachedforthecanteenthatwastiedtothesaddlehorn,wantingthewarmthofthehotliquidinherbelly.Thetwocanteensweretiedtogetheralongwiththebugle,thentheleatherstrapwasdalliedtightaroundthesaddle’shorn.Hernumbfingersfumbledwiththefrozenleatherknotthatdidn’twanttoloosen.Givingup,shetookherknifeandcuttheleather,removingallthree
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fromthesaddle.“Whoa,whoanow.
What’swrongwithyou?”Barleighsaid,hermarethrownintoasuddenpanic.
Thehorsesidesteppedandreared,headhigh,eyeswide,whinnyinginahorse’snervousway.Barleightightenedhergriponthereins,followingthehorse’smovement,joggingforwardtowardthemareasthepanickedhorseshuffled
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backward.“Easy,girl.Easy,”
Barleighsoothed.Thefrightenedhorse
whinnied,shakingherheadleftandright.Rearing,pawingwithslashinghoovesatthemoon,shejerkedthereinsfreeandboltedintothedarkness.
Barleighdroppedtoallfours,pressinglowtotheground.Shemadeaquicksweepwithhereyes,looking
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inalldirections,seeingnothing,butsensing—something.Huddledundertheponcho,shecrouchedonherhaunchesandsippedfromoneofthecanteens.Thespotlightmoonlentitssoft,silverylighttothecrunchy,frozenearth.
“Damnittohell,”shecursed.“Andyes,Stoney,that’sexactlywhatagirlwouldsay.”
Lookingatthedark
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lineoftherockyridgeandtheformationcalledTheNeedles,sheknewshemustbeclosetoCacheCave.Hangingthetwocanteensandthebuglearoundherneck,shestoodtoleavewhensomethinginthelowsagebrush—aflashofyellow—caughtherattention.Shesettledbackdownunderherponchoandwaited,listening,watching.But,shewastheonebeingwatched.
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Apairofeyesglintingintheglareofthemoonlitsnowpeeredoutfromthethicketofsagebrushaboutonehundredyardstothenorthnearthebaseoftheridge.
Whatareyou,wolforcoyote?
Barleighwaitedseverallongminutesbeforetheeyesdisappeared,thenreappearedmomentslater,closer,alongsideanotherpair.
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Andanother.Thenanother.Thehaironthebackofherneckstoodonend.Turningaround,slowanddeliberate,shesawtwopairsofeyes,shinyandbrightandreflectingthesilverymoon,watchinghereverymove.
Leftandright,moreeyesappeared.
TheColtrevolvershecarriedhadonlyfivebulletsloaded.Withtheextracartridgeinherpocket,she
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hadtenshotsinall.Countingthepairsofeyessurroundingher,sherealizedthatifeveryanimalattackedatonce,she’dbeseveralbulletsshortofdefendingherself.That’sifallshotshittheirmark.Sheholsteredthepistol,savingthebulletsforapossibleworsethreat.
WithCashCavetotheeast,shebegantoeasebackwardinitsdirection.Stayinglow,goingslow,not
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makinganythreatingmovements,shekeptherheadpivotingtotheleft,totheright,andtotherear,watchingeachside.Removingthesombrero,shegrippeditinherlefthand,thebugleinherright,andshecrepttowardthecave.
Onebraveanimalmadeanadvance.Shebugledherhornasloudlyasshecouldblowandwavedthesombreroatthestalking
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creature.Heshrankbackintothedarkness.Anotherapproached.Shebugledandwaved.Again,itwasfrightenedaway.Another,thenanother,tested,andeachtime,thenoisefromthehornandtheflappingofthesombreroscaredthehungryanimalsbackintotheshadows.
Amaleandfemalehuntingpairadvancedtogether,flankingleftand
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right.Barleighbugled,whirlingaround,wavingthesombrero,andoneshiedaway.Theboldestofthepaircamecloseandlunged.Barleighslappedwiththesombreroandbugledwithallthebreathshehadleftinhersorelungs.Thewolfretreated,confusedbythestrangetrumpetingnoise.
Bumpingupagainstalargeboulder,Barleighsatandhuddledwithherback
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againstthestone.Theadvancesandretreatscontinuedthroughoutthenight,thebuglingandtheswattingwiththesombrerokeepingthewolveswiththeirhungryeyesretreatingtotheshadowyfringesofthebrush.
Atthemomentwhenshefeltshehadnothingleft,herenergydrained,herbodyexhausted,hersorelipsswollenandcracked,apale
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pinkglowontheeasternhorizongavewaytoahopethatshe’doutlastedthewolves.
Thesunneverroseinboldgrandeur.Theworldjustbecamelight,thesoftgraycloudsdiffusingthepinkstreaks,turningtheskyintoamottledsilverrealm.Withthemorning’slight,thewolvesdisappearedtotheirdenstoawaitthenextnightofhuntingsomeotherprey.
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Hercrampedmusclesached.Barleighstood,pressingafistagainstherlowerback,rubbingandmassagingherstiffneck.Thecoffeeinthecanteenwasbitterandcoldbutshedrankit,holdingthecoldmetalawayfromhersore,bruisedlips.Pickingupthesombrero,sheturneditaroundinherhands,inspectingthebrightyellowhatwiththegoldandblacktrim.Clawortooth
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marksfrayedasmallareaontheedgewherethelargegraywolfhadlunged,gettingfarcloserthanBarleighhadrealized.
Takingnoteofthetopography,BarleighsawthatshewasfurtherfromthebaseofTheNeedlesformationthanwhatshe’danticipated.Feelingdisorientedandconfused—theyweresupposedtobeonherleft...no,onherright...shespun
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around,tryingtogetherbearings.Thesunofferednodirectionalhelp,theskyamilkygraymess.Tracingtheridgewithanimaginaryline,shemarkedthespotwherethelastNeedlepointedtowardEchoCanyon.Breathingasighofrelief,sheturnedaroundandbeganwalkingsoutheast,knowingCacheCavewaslessthanamileaway.
Thecrunchy,half-
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frozenterrainofthetworivers’watershedgavewaytoslipperygravel.Shepickedherwaywithslow,cautiousstepsacrossthetreacherousground.Thepathskiddedandslid,changingonceagaintodeepsand,butshewasalmostthere.Nottoofaraway,maybeanothertwentyyards,shesawthegapingopeningslashedintothesideoftherock,thefamiliartunnelthattravelersknewasCache
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Cave.Abovetheentrance,smalldarkcloudsdriftedinaneasycircle,floatinghighabovetheopening.
Aslow,colddreadsettledoverher.Thecloudsformedintoshapes.Barleighshouted,runningtowardthecave,realizingthecirclingfigureswerenotdarkcloudsatallbutbuzzards—crows—birdsofcarrion.Shetrumpetedthebugle,wavingherarmsandthesombrero.
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Aswiththewolves,thecommotionandthenoisedrovethescavengingbirdsaway.
Approachingtheentrancetothecave,Barleighexchangedthebugleinherhandforherpistol.FiveIndianslaydeadinrusty,freeze-driedpoolsofblood.Offtotheleftweretwomore,thenoneothertotheright.Uponenteringthecave,shesawtwomorewholay
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sprawledtogetherinanunsuccessfuleffortatfleeing.Barleighsteppedoverthelasttwo,unsureofwhatshe’dfindfurtherinthecave.
Andthenshesawhim.
Stoneywasslumped,halfleaning,halflaying,nearthewall,Coltrevolverinonehand,theotherhandholdingthemochilainatightgrip.HeopenedhiseyesasBarleighdroppedtoherkneesnextto
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him.“Mysombrero,”he
whisperedinaweakvoice.“Youbroughtmemy...”Hepointedatthehat,hisvoicetrailingoff.
“Idid,Stoney.Ibroughtittoyou.Howbadareyouhurt?”Thebloodthatpooledunderhimonthegroundfrightenedher.
“TheythoughtIwasdeadwhentheyshotmeoffmyhorse.Theytookthe
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mochila.ButIfollowedthem...here.Igot...gotthemochilaback,”hesaid,hisvoiceraspy.
“Youdidsomefineshooting,Stoney.Lookslikeyougotthemall.”Barleightookhimbytheshoulders,easinghimforward,peeringoverhisshoulderathisback.
Threearrowswereembeddeddownthemiddlenexttohisspine,abovewhatappearedtobeabullet
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wound.ThearrowsborethesamefeatherfletchingastheoneBarleighhadfoundearlieronthebanksoftheWebberRiver.
“Ididn’tgetallofthem.Thetallwhiteman...gotaway.”Hestruggledforbreath.
“Onegotaway?Awhiteman?NotIndian?Stoney—talktome.Stayawake,buddy.”Shegavehimasipofcoldcoffeefromher
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canteen.“Ablackghostwas
here.Hetoldme—Idon’tknow—hetalkedtome.Ghostsaresupposedtobewhite.”Hisraspybreathswereshallowandlabored.
“That’sright,ghostsaresupposedtobewhite.Keeptalkingtome,Stoney.I’mgoingtolayyoudownonyourside,easynow,likethis,andseeaboutgettingthesearrowsout.”
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Memoriesflashed:UncleJack,AuntWinnietuggingatthearrows,thelance—leaningonit,breakingitoff.Barleigh’shandsshook,hervoicetrembled.Sheforcedherselftostaycalm,forStoney’ssake.
“I’llpulltheseout.ThenIcanwrapmyponchoaroundyou,keepyouwarmwhileIgoforahorse.Mineranaway.Wolvesspooked
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her.I’llneedahorsetogetyoutoadoctor.Talktome,Stoney.Stoney?”Hervoicebroke,shatteringhercalm.
Barleighmovedaroundtokneelinfrontofhim.Shelaydownonhersideclosetohim,tookhisfaceinherhands,andkissedhisforehead,soothinghimasbestsheknewhowwithhersoftwords.Shetoldhimeverythingwouldbeallright,thatshe’dbringbackthe
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fastestponyshecouldfindforhimtorideawaytothestars.
“Wouldn’tthatbesomething,Stoney?”sheasked,touchinghischeek.
Bloodtrickledfromthecornerofhismouth.Hegaspedforbreath.HiseyesfoughttostayfocusedonBarleigh’s,butthenhisgazedrifted.Helookedthroughher,beyondtosomeplaceshewouldn’tknow.Onefinal
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rattlingbreathmovedhimfromthisworldtothenext.Stoneywasgone.
“Oh,Stoney.”Shewantedtocry,toscream,tosob.Herbodytightened,heated,trembled,theangerandemotionchokingherbreath,butshecouldn’tseemtofindthereliefthattearswouldoffer.Shefeltanever-endingcircleofsadnesshardeningherheart,addingyetanothercalcifyinglayer.
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Herhandstrembledasshereachedouttoclosehiseyes—thoseeyesthatwereasblueastheriver.“I’msorry,Stoney.I’msosorry.Thiswasmymailrun,notyours.Itshould’vebeenme.”
Coveringhimwithherponcho,shesatwithhisbody,herbackagainstthecavewall.Shekeptherguninhand,attheready.Sippingcoldcoffee,sheworkedthroughaplaninhermind.
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HikingbackuptoHeadofCanyonStationtogethorsesfromColonelHillwastheobviouschoice.Wearinessandbone-deepfatiguewashedoverher.Shetriedtofightitoff,herheadsnappingbackandfallingforward,butsoonshecouldnotresistthepull.Shefellintoadeepsleep,sittingupright,canteeninonehand,pistolintheother.
*****
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Anoiseechoing,ahandonherarm,avoice,amovement,startledherawake.Jumpingup,shetrippedoverherspurs,fallingtoherknees,pointingherpistol,realizingherhandswereempty.Ascreamcaughtinherthroatashandsreachedforher,takingherbythearms,raisinghertoherfeet.Pullingher.Engulfingher.Enfoldingherinhisarms.
Ithappenedsofast,
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shedidn’trealizeitwasHughesuntilshewaspressedagainsthischest—thesmellofhisbody,hisaroma,thescentsherememberedfromthefirsttimeshewrappedherselfinhiscoatfloodinghermemory.
HughestookBarleighinhisarms,holdingherclose,sayingnothing,waitingforherpanictosubside.“Shhh,shhh,”hesoothedasherbreathingreturnedtonormal.
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“I’mluckyit’syou,”shesaid,hervoicetrembling.Shefeltfoolish,fallingasleep,leavingherselfvulnerable.
“It’sallright—I’mhere.”HugheslookedoveratStoneyandshookhishead.“ItoldhimtohangontillIgotback.Damnit—Ithoughthecouldhangon.IhadtogoafterArcher.”
“Whatdoyoumean,tillyougotback?”Barleigh
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pulledaway,Hughes’shandsslowtoreleaseher.
“I’vehadmyeyeontheArchers.They’repartofalargergroupwho’vebeentamperingwiththemail.TheyhirerenegadeUtesandShoshonestodotheirdirtyworksothatitappearslikeacommonIndianattack.Tonightcameasacoldsurprise.Iwasexpectingittohappennextweekwiththewestboundmailto
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California.”“Butyouweredrunk
—sodrunkyoucouldhardlystand,”saidBarleigh,confused.
“Iwasonmywaytoagooddrunk.WhenIlearnedthiswashappeningtonight,Iswitchedthewhiskeyforteatoputonashowforthosewatching.”
“Soitwasaruse,”saidBarleigh,puttingthedetailsoftheeveningin
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order.“Aruse—yes.”“Stoneysaidtheblack
ghostvisitedhim,talkedtohim.Thatwasyou,”shesaid,stealingaglanceatStoneylyingstillandquietunderherponcho.
Barleighfistedahandagainsthermouth,afraidthatifsheweretoremoveit,afloodofunbearablesadnesswouldcomerushingout.Itwasbettertoholditinside
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whereitbelonged—buriedalongsidetheothermemoriesshetriedtohush.
“IguessI’mtheblackghost,”acknowledgedHughes,nodding.“StoneyhandledtheIndiansjustfine,butJohnnyArcherhadStoneypinned.Ishotonce—itgrazedhim.Archerfled,buthisbloodmadethetraileasytofollowinthemoonlight.ThatStoneywasabraveson-of-a-gun.”
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“Brave—yes,hewasbrave,”shesaid,pacing,clenchingherfistsintoherhair,thenkneelingnexttowhereStoneylay—butitwasshewhoshouldbelyingthere,nothim.“Itwasmymailrun...”Barleigh’svoicetrailedoff.
“It’snotyourfault,Barleigh.Don’tgodownthatroad.”Hugheskneltbesideher,turninghertofacehim.
“I’mveryfamiliar
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withthatroad,”shesaid.Thiswasn’tthefirstdeathforwhichshefeltresponsible.
“Whatareyousaying?”
“Myfirstwasmymother,whenshegavebirthtome.ThentherewasPapaandBirdieandUncleJack,whenIranlikeafrightenedchildandhidinthecellarinsteadoffightingalongsidePapalikeIshouldhave.Now,Stoney.”Shelookeddownat
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herhands,asifshewouldseeblood.
“Stopit.”Hughes’shandsgrippedhershoulders.“Don’tdothistoyourself.Allthisfalseguiltwilldonothingbutkeepyoufromeverfindinghappiness.”
“I’mnotlookingforhappiness.Idon’texpectit’slookingforme,either.”Sheshruggedawayfromhisgrip.“AllI’mlookingforisawaytogetbacktothecity.I’m
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horseless.Wolvesspookedmineaway.AndI’mtakingStoneywithme.I’mnotleavinghimhere.”
“I’vegotArcher’sbodyoutsidetiedtohishorse.Wecanleaveitinthecave,telltheauthoritieswheretofindhim,andusehishorsetogetStoneyhome.Youcanridebehindme.”
TheywrappedStoney’sbodyinHughes’sbedrollafterHughesremoved
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thearrowsfromhisback,andthendrapedhimoverthesaddleoftheoutlawArcher’shorse.Barleightiedthesombrerotothepommel,lettingStoneytakeithome.Iftheyrodenonstopatasteadypace,thetrekbacktoSaltLakeCitywouldtakewellintothenight.
BarleighrodebehindHughes,holdingontohiscoat,tryingnottothinkofStoneylyingacrossthe
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saddleofthehorsethattrailedbehind—tryingnottothinkatall.ShepoundedherforeheadagainstHughes’sback,overandoveragain.
Hughesneverflinchedbutreachedahandaroundtosqueezeherthigh.ThetendernessandtheintimacywasalmosttoomuchforBarleightobear.Shestoppedpoundingherforeheadand,instead,layhercheekagainsthisbackandtightlyclosed
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hereyes,staunchingtheflowoftears.
Aseveningworeon,HughesdecidedtomakeasmallcampfiretoreheatthecoffeeinBarleigh’scanteen.Hughesdidn’thavehissaddlebagspackedwithhisusualfancypicnic,sodinnerwasbeansandsourdoughbiscuits.ForBarleigh’sstarvingstomach,itwasafeast.
Sittingonalogclose
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tothecracklingfire,shesippedsteamingcoffeefromthetincupHugheshandedher.“WhenItookofflookingforStoney,ItoldMariothatImight...thatIwasthinkingaboutgoingbacktoTexasafterIfoundhim.Ididn’tthinkI’dbebringinghimbacklikethis.”
Hughesstirredtheembers,addingmorekindling.Theflamessparkedanddancedupwardlikehow
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lighteningbugsdoinawarmsummersky.Helookedbackoverhisshoulder,thelookofreliefevidentonhisface.
“You’regoingbacktoTexas?Iamsorelievedtohearyousaythat.”
“IthoughtI’dmadeupmymind.ButIcan’tleaveMariolikethis.Ihavetostaynow.Forawhile,atleast.”
Hughescametokneelinfrontofthelogshewassittingon,takingherhandsin
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his.“Barleigh,lookatme.Stoney’sdead.There’remanyotherslikethemenwhokilledhim.They’llkillanyonewhogetsintheirway.TheArcherbrotherswereasmallfractionofthoseinvolvedwho’dliketokeepcertainlettersfromgoingbetweenWashingtonandCalifornia.TheseSouthernsympathizerswillstopatnothingtoconvinceCaliforniatosidewiththe
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Confederacy.Youhavenoideathedangeryourideintoeverytimeyoupickupthatdamnmochila.”
“Areyousayingthatthisisjustthebeginning?”Achillshivereddownherspine,despitethefireandthecoffeeprovidingtheirownwarmth.
“That’sright,”hesaid,hiseyesdarkandserious.“Anintricateconspiracywithafar-reachingassociationisat
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work.TensionsescalatingbetweenNorthandSouthspurtheseconspiratorstomoreheinousactsintheireffortstopullCalifornia’sgoldintotheRebelwarcoffers.LincolnhastokeepCalifornialoyaltotheUnion,therebykeepingcontrolofitsgold.WhicheverwayCaliforniasidescouldswaytheoutcome.”
“Youtalkasifwariscertain.”
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“Ibelieveitis.”“Thenthat’sallthe
morereasonformetohelpgetthemailthrough.Lookatwhat’satstake.”
“Lookatwhat’soverthereandtiedtothathorse,”hesaid,hisvoiceharshandlow.“Areyouwillingtotakethatrisk?”
“MaybeIam.Maybeitdoesn’tmatter.”Barleigh’seyesfilledwithsadnessatthebrutalthoughtjabbingather
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heart.“StarlingwouldbebetteroffbeingraisedbyAuntWinnie,anyway.”
Hughestossedtherestofhiscoffeeinthefire.Settlinghiseyesonher,hiswordsweresharpandemphatic.“Lookatme,Barleigh.That’snottrue.Yoursisterneedsyou.Riskingyourlifeonpurpose—takingdangerouschancesyoudon’thaveto—isnottheanswer.”
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Barleighstood,kickingsandintothefire.“Whycan’ttherebeeasyanswers,wheredecisionsdon’tseemimpossible?”
“Notalldecisionsareimpossible.Damnit—Ican’tletthisgoon.Ithastostop.”HugheswalkedovertowhereBarleighstood,hisambereyesreflectingthefire’sflickeringlight.
“Whatdoyoumean?Whathastostop?”
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“Therearethings...”Hepaused,suckinginadeepbreath,lettingitseepoutslowlythroughgrittedteeth.“...thatyouneedtoknow.”Hughesrubbedthebackofhisneckandlookedtothesky,asifthemoonwouldgivehimtherightwords.
“Hughes?Whatareyoutryingtosay?”sheasked,alarmedbythelookonhisface,thesetofhisjaw,andthegravetoneofhisvoice.
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“It’skillingme,seeingyoulikethis,sotornup,sosadandguilt-riddenoversomethingthatdidn’thappen.”Hughesheldheratarm’slength,fixinghispenetratingeyesonhers.“Youcan’tgoonthinkingthatyou’reresponsibleforyourmother’sdeath.Barleigh,yourmotherdidn’tdiegivingbirthtoyou.Yourmotherisalive.”
*****
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Shehaddoneashehadrequested—listenedandlethimspeakuninterrupted.Hetalkeduntilthefirewentcold,givingBarleighanabbreviatedtellingofhermother’slife,sparingafewdetails,hehadsaid,thatLeighsellemightwishtokeeptoherself.
HetoldofthesorrowhefeltthatBarleigh’smothermightdiebeforehecouldpersuadehertochangeher
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mindaboutkeepingthisasecret,andthathehadtriedtoconvincehertoagreetolethimtellBarleighthetruth.Now,hewasn’tsureiftherewouldbeenoughtime.
Barleighfeltassaultedbyhiswords.Theycoveredherwithshameandfilledherwithanguish.Theynumbedeveryfiberandnerveofherbeing.Inaspanoftimethatlastedlessthanonehour,heundidherpast.Hisstory
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revisedherhistory.Itstrippedawaywhatshe’dknowntobetrueofthelifeshe’dwornsocomfortably.
Shesat,listening,unmoving,astatuewithoutfeelings.Birdie,whomshe’dalwaysthoughtwassobeautiful,soexotic—it’snowonderherpapahadfalleninlovewithher.Birdieremindedhimofhisfirstlove.
Barleighsatfrozenin
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place,hearing,absorbing,processing.Thedark,frostywoodsswirledaroundher.Noisesfarawaymadehollowechoes.Aghostwindskimmedacrossherskin,nottouching,justpassingover.Nothingseemedreal.
“Barleigh,areyouallright?Iknowit’salottotakein.Youhaven’tsaidanything.”
“Youwantedmetolistentoyourstorywhileyou
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spokeuninterrupted.I’velistened.”
“Please,”saidHughes,takingherhand.“Saysomethingnow.Askmeaquestion.”
“HowmuchfurthertoSaltLake?”Shewalkedtowherethehorsesweretied,shakingherhead,botharmsextended,herpalmspressingoutwardagainstthisforeignworldclosinginonher.
Shewaitedfor
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Hughestofollow,andshecouldn’tspeak.Wordsthatformedinherheadcrumbledtodustbeforeescapinghermouth.Hughesletherhavehersilence.Whenhewasinthesaddle,shemountedthehorsebehindhim,withtheleadropethatconnectedthemtoStoney’shorsedalliedaroundtheirsaddlehorn.
Barleigh’smindwastangledwithdistressedthoughtsandimages.Her
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entirelifehadbeenalie.DidPapaknowthathermotherdidn’tdieinchildbirth?DiditnotmatterbecausehehadgrowntoloveBirdie?AndGrandfather—Grandfatherliedandmanipulatedthetotalityofherexistence.WasBirdiecomplicitinthecharade,ordidshe,aslave,nothaveachoice?Amother,aliveallthattime—allthatguilt—thatwitheverybirthdayBarleighenjoyed,it
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wasananniversaryofhermother’sdeath.
AndHughes—hiredtotrackherdown—andonfindingher,knowingwhoshewas,yetpretendingnotto.ThetelegraphstohermotherinSanAntonio,givingherupdates.LettingBarleighthinkthathewasfallingforherwithhiskissesandhisfalseworry.AndBarleigh,fallingforhim.
Thesilentwords
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bangedaroundinherheaduntilshecouldn’tthinkanymore,couldn’tbreathe.Aroilingpanicbeganswellingfromdeepwithin.Cold,pricklysweatbeadedonherskinaswavesofnauseawashedoverher.
“Please,stopthehorse,”shesaid,butbeforeshecouldfinishthewords,herstomachbetrayedher,retchingthesourdoughbiscuitsandreheatedcoffee.
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Leaningaway,shetriedtothrowupsothatitdidn’tfoulthehorseorHughes.
Hughesreinedtoastopandloweredhertotheground,retrievingacanteenofwaterfromhisbag.“Areyouallright?”
“AmIallright?AmI?HowcanIbeallrightwhenIdon’tknowwhoIam?”
“You’restillyou.Youhavenotchanged.Onlyyour
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story’schanged.Youlookpale,”hesaid,dismountingandtakingherbytheshoulders.
“Ifeelpale.”“Barleigh,please
understand.IwasdoingwhatIthoughtwasright.Icouldn’tbetraythepromiseI’dsworntoyourmother.Ihave,andIhopeshe’llforgiveme.Butdamnit—itwastherightthingtodo.”
“Honoringthat
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promisetoher,thenselectivelychoosingwhichsecretstokeeporwhichliesorhalf-truthstoupholdwithme?Idon’tunderstandyouoryourcodeofethics.Idon’twanttounderstand.Whenwegetbacktothecity,Idon’twanttoeverseeyouagain.”
Sheshruggedawayfromhisgriponhershouldersandkneltdown,scoopingsnowintoherhands,washingherfaceandhermouth.She
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pressedhericyfingersagainsthercheeks,wantingtofeelthebitingcoldonherskin,andshebreathedthefrigidairdeepintoherlungsuntiltheyburnedandshecoughed.Still,everythingfeltunreal,asifsheweredisconnectedfromeachofhersenses.Eventhebeautyoftheruggedlandscape,thesmellofthepinetrees,andthecrunchingsoundherbootsmadeinthesnowseemedlike
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forgeries.“SinceI’veknown
you,”saidHughes,“youkeepyouremotionsincheck,burieddeepinside.Yourworld’sbeenrippedtopiecestoday.Iwishyoucouldletitoutsomehow.Scream.Cry.Throwafit.Throwapunchortwo.Releaseabitofemotionalsteam.”
“Ididreleaseemotion.Ispeweditalloverthebackofyourcoat.”
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Hughesforcedagrin.“I’mserious.”
“Iam,too.Yourcoat’samess.Sorry.”
Hetookhiscoatoffandlookedatthestain.“I’veseenworse.”Then,rubbingahandfulofsnowonit,washingawaywhathecould,heputthecoatbackon.“There.Thatshoulddothetrick.”
Backinthesaddle,heheldouthishandforBarleigh
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toremountbehindhim.“Readytoride?”
“Yes,”sherepliedwithanod.“We’vealongwaytogo.”
Sheputherfootinthestirruptoclimbupbehindhim,butawaveofdizzinesscausedhertototterbackward.Regrouping,shetriedagain.Beforeshecouldmanageathirdattempt,Hughesleaneddownfromthesaddle,liftingher,sittingherinfrontofhim
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sidesaddle.Hecradledheragainsthimwithhisarmsencirclingherasheheldthereinsineachhand,guidingthehorsehome.
Withnostrengthtoprotest,Barleighlayherheadagainsthischest,buthereyesremainedalertandwatchfulasthetrailwounditswaydownintothevalley.Thebright,fullmoonoverheadcastsilveryshadowsoftheirprocessionontothehard-
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packed,frozenground.*****
ItwasmidnightwhentheyrodeintothePonyExpressstables.BarleighhadmovedbehindHughes,notwantingtogivecauseforanyquestionsorraisedeyebrows.Thestreetswerequiet,afewlightsburnedinwindows,catsprowledincorners,andsnowcrunchedundertheweightofthehorses’hooves.
Thetranquilscene
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madeBarleighwanttoscream.
TheyweremetbyMario,whotookthehorsecarryingStoney’sbody.“MyGod,myGod.Hewasafineyoungman.MyGod—”Mariodidn’ttrytohidehistears.“I’llmakearrangementstosendhimbacktoArkansasandtohisfamily.Aboyshouldbeburiedwherehisfolkscantendthegrave.”
“Hewouldn’twant
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that,”Barleighsaid,givingMario’sarmasqueeze.“Heneverwantedtogohomeagain.He’dwanttobeburiedherealongthePonyExpresstrail.”
“That’swhatwe’lldo,then,”saidMario.“I’lltendtohisgrave.Getsomerestnow.I’lltakecareofthingshere.”
“Stoneysavedthemochila.WeleftitwithColonelHillatHeadof
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CanyonStationsoitcouldcontinueontoSaintJoe.Stoneydiedsavingthemail.Someoneoughttobetoldaboutthat.Itwasheroic,whathedid.”ShegaveMarioabriefdescriptionofevents,Hughesfillinginthegapsofherinformation.
“EveryonewillhearofStoney’sstory.Itdon’ttakelongforsomethinglikethattomaketherounds.ButI’llsendwordtoCarsonCity
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andhavethemtelegraphheadquarterstomakesuretherightpeopleknow,too.”Marioremovedthesombrerofromthesaddlehorn,handingittoBarleigh,andthenledStoney’shorseaway.
HughesandBarleighwalkedtotheSaltLakeHouse,climbedthestairstothesecondfloor,andsaidgoodnight,sheturningtoherroom,hetohis.
“Areyougoingtobe
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allright?”Hughesasked,turningbackaround.
“Iwishyou’dquitaskingthat.”
“Arealltheridersaway?Doyouhaveanyonetobunkwithtonight?”Hugheslookedather,concernwrinklinghisbrow.
“Areyouworriedaboutme?”
“Yes,damnit,I’mworriedaboutyou,allright?”
“Ithoughtyoudidn’t
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havetimetoworryaboutme.”Shedidn’twaitforhimtoanswer,butturnedandopenedthedoortothebunkroom.“ItappearsIhavetheroomtomyselftonight.BrodymustbeonStoney’s...ontheeastboundrun.Iguessthenewguy,Lars,isonmine.”
“Givemeaminute,please.I’llbeback.”
“Why?”“BecauseIdon’twant
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youtobealonetonight.”“It’snotnecessary,
Hughes.Besides,whatifIwanttobealone.”
“I’llbequiet.Youcanpretendtobealone.Whydoyoualwayshavetoargue?”
“Whydoyoualwaysassumeyouknowwhat’sbest?”
“It’snotanassumption.”Heturnedandwalkedaway.
Aquickspongebath
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fromthebasinvessel,abrushingofherteeth,acombthroughherhair,andachangeintocleanlongjohnsmadeherfeelalmosthumanagain.ShewasinbedbythetimeHughesreturned.Thoughhalfasleep,shenoticedhe’dputoncleanclothes,too.
“I’llbequiet.Youwon’tevenknowI’mhere.”Bendingoverthebed,hekissedheronthecheek.“I’ll
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beonthebottombunk,ifyouneedanything.Ihopeyousleepwell.”
Butshedidn’t.Shetossedandturned,fitsandstartsofdreamstormentinghersleep.Disembodiedfacesfloatedinandout,chasing,yelling,hovering.Grandfather’sface,laughing.PapaandBirdieclutchedinaskeletalembrace.Barleighfalling.Stoneytryingtocatchherbuthishandswerebloody
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andslipperyandtheycouldn’tholdon.Heletgo.Thenhewastumblingdown,down,downamountainthatneverended,butitwasherbloody,slipperyhandsthatlethimfall.Awolfhowled.Herdreamwolf.Hewasshakingher.Wakeup.You’reallright.It’sallright.
“I’mrighthere,Barleigh.It’sallright.”Hughessatonthesideofthebed,holdingherhand,
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strokingherface.“Shhh.Everything’sallright.I’mrighthere.”
Barleighbolteduprightinbed,jerkingawayfromhistouch,drawingherkneesintoaprotectiveshield.“Idon’twantyouhere.Leave.Leavemealone.”
“Youwerehavinganightmare,”Hughessaid,offeringheraglassofwater.
Shepushedtheglassandhishandaway.“I’m
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livinganightmare.”Feelingburiedunder
alltheliesshe’dbeentoldallherlife,nowHughes’slies,howhe’dtradedthetruthforheraffection,shebegantohyperventilate—acoldpanicrising,swelling,suffocatingher.Kickingthecoversaway,shelashedoutatHughes,triedtopushhimoffthebedwithbothofherfeet,kickingandclawingatanythingthatwashim.
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“Isaidtoleave!”shecriedout,halfwhimpering,halfshouting.
“I’mnotgoinganywhere,”hesaid,hisvoicecalmandmeasured.
Shoving,kicking,thrashingthecovers,sheknockedthewaterglassoffthenightstandasshetriedtopushHughesaway.Withherfoot,sheshovedthewoodenbedsidestand,sendingitscooting,thewaterbasin
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tottering,falling,andshatteringtopiecesasithitthefloor.
HughespulledBarleighagainsthischest,encirclingherinhisarms,holdinghertighterasshecontinuedtokickandlashout.“Getitallout,butI’mnotlettinggountilyou’redone.”
“Don’tyouunderstand?Allthelies.Everything’sbeenalieora
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secret—Grandfather,Papa,mymother.Yourlies.Lookatme—I’mlivingmyownlie.”Shebrokedown,thesobscominginwaves.“Idon’tknowwhattruthis.AllIknowisthatIwantyoutoleave,”shesaid,thefinalwordsspokeninawhisper,herbreathfeelinglikeneedlesinherlungs.
“Nope.I’mnot.ButI’llturnyoulooseifyou’rereadytoquitclawingatme
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likeatiger,”hesaid,soundingsomewhathopeful.
“Whydidyoutellme?”Barleighputupahalfheartedattemptatastruggletofreeherselffromhisclutch.“Mylifewasfine—thememoriesIhadofwhatmylifewas,withoutknowingaboutallthis...thiscraziness.”
“Youwereinaverydarkplace,Barleigh,”hesaid,hiswordswhisperedagainst
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herear.“Adarkplace,spiralingintoadangerousvoidofunjustifiedguilt.”
“You’veshownmethatmylifehasbeennothingbutafarce.You’veeffectivelyerasedmyhistory,mymemories.Forthat,Ihateyou.”
“Youcanhatemeallyouwantfortellingyou,”saidHughes,cradlingheragainsthischest.“ButItoldyoutogiveyousomethingto
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livefor.Youhaveamotherwholovesyou.”
Momentspassed.WhenBarleigh’sbreathingreturnedtoashakyversionofnormal,herelaxedhisgrip,andshepulledaway.Then,gatheringthecoversontothebedthatshe’dkickedtothefloor,sheturnedtofacethewall,pullingthemoverherhead,buryingherselfunderthemoundofblankets.
“Sleep,Barleigh,”
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saidHughes,watchinghercocoonherselfinthedownyduvet.“I’mnotgoinganywhere.I’llbeherewhenyouwakeup.”
*****HughespulledachairnexttoBarleigh’sbed,sleepafarthoughtfromhismind.Hewatchedtheshapeunderthecoversmovewitheachbreath,atfirstpantingandstillenraged,thenmoreevenly,thencalmand
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measured.Hemovedtheblanketawayfromherface,makingsurenottowakenher.
Hewantednothingmorethantocrawlintothatbedandholdher.Totakeherinhisarmsandtellherthateverythingwouldbeallright,tolaywithherallnightwithherheadonhischest.
Hewantedtoassureherthathisaffectionsforherwerereal—andheknewthat
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herswerereal,too.Or,thattheywere.
Hewishedheknewthateverythingwouldbeallright,buthedidn’t.
So,he’djustsitthere.Hewasn’tgoinganywhere.Andhe’dbetherewhenshewokeupinthemorning,justlikehesaidhewould.
Then,he’dleave.
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CHAPTERSIXTEEN
NOVEMBER29,1860
Sunlightfilteredthroughthedarkvelvetdrapes,puddlingonthefloorinbig,unevenspots.Fromtheangleoftheshadows,morningwasmeltingintonoon.Barleighblinkedhard,rubbedfistsoverhereyes,yawned,
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stretched,andboltedupright,pullingtheblanketsuptoherchin.
“Uh...,”Shedrewinasharpbreath.“Whatareyoudoinghere?”
Hughessatinthechair,watchingasBarleighwokeup.Hisbloodshoteyesgaveevidenceofhisall-nightvigil.“Don’tyouremember?Whenwegotbacklastnight,Itriedtoleaveandgotomyownroom,butyoubegged
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metostay—saidyoudidn’twantmetoleaveyoualone.”
“That’snothowIrememberit,nowthatit’scomingbacktome.Isthatcoffee?”shesnapped.Asshereachedforthecup,thenotionoftheirfingerstouchingcausedherstomachtopitch.Shenowdreadedthephysicalcontactthatsheoncefoundpleasurable.
“Yes.”Hehandeditover.“IpromisedyouthatI’d
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beherewhenyouwokeupandIdidn’twanttobreakthatpromise—haveyouwakeuptoseemegone.ButyouweresnoringsoloudlyIfiguredyouwereinadeepenoughsleepIcouldchancearuntothekitchen.”
“Idon’tsnore.DoIsnore?Really?”Shesippedthecoffeeandhandedhimbackthecup.
“Yes.Really.Butinacute,girlishsortofway.
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Actually,that’snotquiteprecise.It’smorelikeagrizzlybeardefendinghercubs.”
“Youcouldhaveleftitatcuteandgirlish,”shesaid,embarrassed.
“Probably,butImadeapromisetomyselflastnightthatI’dnevertellyouanotherlieorbedishonestwithyou.Ever.”
“Icouldlooktheotherwaywhenitcomestothings
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likedescribingmysnoring.”Thinkingabout
honestyanddeceitmadeherwanttorolloverandpullthecoversoverherhead.Theenormityofrevealedsecretsweighedonhershoulderslikeathousand-poundcloak.
Hughessippedthecoffeeandhandedherthecup.“Beinghonestwithyoumeansbeinghonestwithmyself,too.”
Hestoodandwalked
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totheothersideoftheroom,drewbackthecurtain,andcrackedopenthewindow,allowingthefresh,coolairtoseepin.HeturnedandlookedatBarleighwithapuzzledexpression.“Howcanyouwakeuplookingsobeautiful,andtheseyahoosnotlookatyouandseethatyou’reawoman?You’vegottenawaywithbeingBarFlanderslongerthanIwould’vebet.”
Shefeltablushrising
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andlookedaway.“IbettergetdressedsowecangoandcheckonStoney’sarrangements.”
“Beforewedo,there’retwomorethingsIneedtotellyou,”hesaid,walkingovertothechair.
“More?”Whatelsecouldtherebe,afterallhe’dsaidlastnight?Shestiffened,bracingforhurtfulwordssuretofollow.
“First,ifsomething
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happens,yourmother’swillleavesyouatidysumofmoneyalongwithsomeNewOrleansrealestate.WhenIwrotetoLeighselletoletherknowI’dfoundyourtrail,Ifilledherinonthedetails.SinceIwasheadingtoSaintJosephanywayonbusiness,I’dcontinuelookingforyou.Awirewaitingformetheresaidthatshe’dtakencareofthetaxesonyourranch,andputmoneyinyouraccountto
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morethancovernextyear’s,too.”
“Idon’tunderstand.Whyissheunwillingtomeetme—gettoknowme—totellmethesethingsinperson—”Barleighflungherselfbackagainstthepillows,pullingtheduvetupoverherhead.
“It’snotthatshe’sunwilling.Shedidn’twanttointerruptyourlife.Shefeltthatyouknowingaboutherwoulddisruptwhatshe’d
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hopedwasahappylife.LeighsellecarriesanenormoussenseofguiltthatsomehowshewasresponsibleforGrandfatherFlanderstakingyouawayfromher.Alifetimeofguilt,evenifit’sunearned,cancolorthewayapersonseesreality,evenagoodpersonwhomeanswell,likeyourmother.Likeyou.”
“That’salottothinkabout,”saidBarleigh,herwordsmuffledcomingfrom
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underthecovers.“Yousaidyougrewto
wishyouweren’tyourgrandfather’skin.Youhavemoreincommonwithyourmother,awomanwhomyou’veneverknown,thanwithyourgrandfatherwhoraisedyou.”Hughessmiled,hiseyeslightingup.
“Really?”Shepeepedoutfromunderthecovers,thensatup,leaningforward.“DoIremindyouofmy
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mother?”“Yes.Besidesyour
beauty,you’vegotyourmother’sgumption—herfearlessdeterminationtosetthingsright.Leighsellepassedontoyouherloveofanimals,herkindness,herabilitytobluffatpoker,andherfondnessforthecoloryellow.I’venoticedyoualwayswearthatyellowbandanaaroundyourneck.”
“I’vealwaysbeen
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drawntothecolor.”Thethoughtofcommontraitswarmedher,liketheyellowraysofthesun.“Yousaidthereweretwothingsyouhadtotellme.What’sthesecond?”Shereachedforthecoffee,takingthelastdrop.
“ThisisthepartwhereI’mbeinghonestwithmyself.”Heleanedbackinthechair,thensatforward.“ThenightbeforeLeighsellecametoSanAntonio,I’d
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beenonmywaytoFortWorthtopickupaprisonertoescorthimtoAustinfortrial.Partwaythere,thehorseIwasridinggaveoutanddied,andIsetoffwalkingbacktoSanAntonio.”
“Goon.”ShenoticedtheanxietygrowmoreevidentonHughes’sface.Hiseyesdarkened,heclenchedandunclenchedhisjaw,hisbrowfurrowedintodeeplines.
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“IknewIwasbeingfollowed,andbeforeIcouldthink,Ihadthreelassoesonme.ItwasQuanahParkerandhiswarriors.”Hughesswallowed,hismouthdry,andhereachedforthecoffeebeforerememberingitwasempty.HesmiledatBarleighassheshruggedandmouthed“sorry.”
Hetoldherthestoryofhowhehadtothinkfastandfigureoutawaytokeep
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hisscalp,howhe’dtalkedQuanahintoafightforbraggingrights,inordertosavehislife.Quanahhadkilledoneofhisownmen—itwouldhavebeennothingforhimtokillHughes,too.
“Thankfully,theyhaveafearfulrespectforwolves,andthespiritofthewolf,”hesaid.
“Idon’tunderstand.”“WayaAgatoliisthe
shortenedversionofthename
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theComanchehadgivenme.ManWhoSeesWithWolfEyes.Iusedtheirsuperstitionstomyadvantage.”
“Ah—Isee.”Shethoughtofherreoccurringdreamofthewolfwiththeamber-coloredeyes,thewayhewouldwatchoverherwhilesheslept,keepingthenightmaresatbay.ShewonderediftheComanchedidn’thaveitright—and
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therewasnothingsuperstitiousaboutit.
“Ishouldhavekilledhimrightthere.ButIknewifIdid,hiswarriorswouldhavefilledmewitharrowsbeforeQuanah’sheartquitbeating.Quanahhonoredouragreement.Heletmegofree,andmadehiswarriorshonorit,too.”
“AndthiswasduringthetimeoftheComanchemoon?”sheasked.
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“Yes.Afterthat,it’spossibleQuanahheadednorthfortheLlanoEstacado,oneofhisband’shuntinggrounds.ThatwouldputhimpassingthroughPaloPintoaroundthenightofyourfamily’stragedy.”Hughesleanedthechairbackontotwolegsandsuckedinadeepbreath,easingthechairdownasheexhaled.
“Ifyou’d—”Barleighstarted.
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“IfI’dkilledQuanahwhenI’dhadthechance,you’dstillhaveyourfatherandBirdie,WinniewouldhaveJack.”Heleanedforward,puttinghisheadinhishands.“Icouldhavepreventedit.”Hepoundedhisfistsontohisknees.“Goddammit.”
Barleighslidoutofbed,walkingaroundtohischair.Shelayherhandonthebackofhisheadfora
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moment,notknowingwhattosayordo,whattofeelortothink.Footstepsinthehallwaydrewherattentiontothedoor,theknobturningcausinghertohurryawayfromHughes.Shewenttothearmoireandpulledoutcleanclothesandbegantodressfortheday.
Mariostuckhisheadinthedoor.“Bar,Iwashopingyou’dbeawake.Theundertakerhasaplacefor
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Stoneyupbythechapelclosetothetrail.Hesayshecanburyhimthisafternoonatoneo’clockifthat’sagreeable.”
Barleighlookedupfrompullingonherboots.“Oneo’clock.Thanks,Mario.Yougoingbacktothebarn?Ineedtocometalktoyouaboutmyjob.”
“I’llbethere.Mr.Lévesque,seeyouatone?”
“Yes.Thankyou,”hesaidasMarionoddedand
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closedthedoor.Hughesstoodandtooktheemptycoffeecup.“Ineedsomemore—withalittlefortification.Youwantsome?”Hepulledouthisflaskandsplashedsomeamberliquidintothewaitingcup.
“Sure.I’llcomedownwithyou.”
“Bar,”saidHughes,standinginthedoorway.“Iknowlessaboutthefuturethanyoudoaboutthepast,
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butIdoknowthis.Nomoresecrets,nomorelies,notbetweenus.You’vemadeitclearyoudon’twantanythingtodowithme.Iunderstand.I’mleavingforCaliforniatomorrow.Idon’tknowwhenI’mcomingback.Canweatleastpartasfriends?”
“That’sthefirsttimeyou’vecalledme‘Bar’inaprivateconversation.”SheremovedStoney’ssombreroofftherack,loopedthebolo
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aroundherneck,lettingtheyellowMexicanhathanglooseacrossthebackofhershouldersassheclosedthedoor.
*****Theundertakerandhiswife,apetiteredheadwhosanginthechurchforfreebuthiredherselfoutforsocialgatheringsandfunerals,werewaitingwhentheyarrivedatthesmallgravesidechapel.Stoney’sfuneralhadafew
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attendees:Barleigh,Hughes,Mario,thetwonewriders—LiamandhisbrotherLars—BigBrodyandhisbrotherYates,thehotelcook,andastringofrangyPonyExpresshorsestiedtothehitchingposts.Offtooneside,hidingintheshadowsofalargepinetree,wasadoe-eyedblonde-headedgirlwhomadefinechocolatecreampies.
Theundertakerchosetoreadafierypassagefrom
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theBookofRevelationaboutpalehorsesandhellanddeathanddestruction,afterwhichhiswifesangapopularlovesong,WhentheCornIsWaving,AnnieDear.Barleighdidn’tknowwhichwasmoreinappropriate,butbothleftherspeechlessandlightheaded.Ormaybethelightheadednesswasduetotheearlierconsumptionoffortifiedcoffeeonanemptystomach.Eitherway,allshe
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wantedwastobealone,onahorse,andridingfarawayfromthere.
Theothersdepartedafterthesinging,withMarioleadingthestringofponies,oneofthemriderlessanddrapedinablackblanket.Hughesleanedagainsthishorse,armscrossed,eyesdarkandwatchfulasBarleighplacedawreathofChristmashollyonStoney’sgrave.
Shesatdownnextto
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thefreshmoundofdirtandthoughtofallthethingsshewishedshe’dsaidtoStoney,allthethingsshewishedshe’daskedhim.Didhismamaeverstickupforhimwhenhisdaddybeathimwithhisfists,ordidStoneyhavetodefendher,too?DidhehaveanyhappyChristmasmemoriesfromhischildhood?Didheevergetwhathewishedfor?Wasthereroominhissmallcorner
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oftheworldforwishes?Theskydarkened
withthreateningcloudsmovinginfromthewest.Thefeelandsmelloftheairalteredinthewayitdoesbeforeastormsettlesoverthevalley,thekindofstormthatdeclaresit’sheretostayawhile.
“Iknowthishasbeenhardforyou,”saidHughes,walkingovertothegrave.“Stoneywasmorethana
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friend.Youhaven’tutteredawordtoanyonesincewegothere.Areyouspeakingtome?”
Shenoddedherhead,herbesteffort.
“Willyoutellmethatyou’respeakingtome?Please.”
“I’mspeakingtoyou.Ijustdon’tknowwhattosay.”Hervoicewasawhisper,barelyaudibleeventoherself.
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“WhatdidyoutellMarioaboutyourjob?Didyoudecidetokeepriding,ortogobacktoTexas?”Hugheskneltdownbythegrave,nexttoBarleigh,hisshoulderagainsthers.
“ItoldhimIhadn’tmadeupmymindyet.Ineededtosleeponit.LiamandLarsareridingwiththeregulars,EaganandHaslan.They’relearningthetrail,soMariosaidhe’singoodshape
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withridersfornow.”“What’syourplan
betweennowandinthemorning?”
ShefeltHughesstudyingherface,tryingtoreadher.Shekeptherprofiletohim,keepinghereyestoherself.Hewasalwaystryingtoreadher—animpossiblemission.Withthewallsshehadbuilt,shewasfindingitdifficulteventoreadherself.
“Takealongride.
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Think.Clearmyhead.”Shestood,lookingoverhershoulderatthelineoftheWasatchMountainsagainstthecharcoalsky.
“Don’tridefar.Theweather’sturning.Iworryaboutyou.”Hisambereyesseemedtodeepeninhue,withflecksofdarkgoldenbrownandrusset,likethefirstsparksofafirestrengtheningandcatchinghold.
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“You’renotverygoodatworrying.Anyway,I’mnotyourstoworryabout.”Barleighturnedandswungherselfintothesaddle.Neverlookingback,shecanteredaway.
*****HughessatbyStoney’sgraveandwatchedherridetowardthefoothills,watchedforalongwhileuntilherformbecameasmallspeckonthehorizon.Anicywindbegan
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toblow,snappinghisattentionbacktothepresent.Thecloudshadthickened,thefirstflakesofsnowdustingtheground.
Hisguttightenedlikeitdideverytimehewatchedherrideawaybyherself.Shewasright—hewasn’tgoodatworrying.Swinginghimselfupintothesaddle,herodeintheoppositedirectionintotown.Hehadunfinishedbusinessbeforeheleftfor
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California.*****
GeorgeArcherhadreceivedwordofhisbrother’sdeathandthedeathofthetenShoshoneIndiansthey’demployedintheirschemetostealthePonyExpressmail.Thatthemochilawasrescuedandsentthroughonitseastboundrouteinfuriatedhim.ThoselettersfromCalifornia’sgovernortothepresidentoftheUnitedStates
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shouldhavebeenstopped.HewasstandingatthebaroftheSaltLakeHousespeakingtotwoothermenwhenHughesreturnedtothehotelfromStoney’sfuneral.
SpyingArcheralongwiththeothersinthebar,Hughesformulatedaplanandputittoquickaction.Hepulledhisflaskfromhisvestandstumbleduptothebartender,wavingtheflaskintheair,speakinginaloud,
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slurredvoice.“Bartender,my
whiskey’srundry.Gimmeyourbestbottle.”TurningtoArcher,Hughesleanedclose.“Don’tyouhateanemptyflask?Ido.”Hebelched,foreffect.
“WhatIhateisarude,louddrunk.Backoffandmindyourownbusiness,”saidArcher,hisvoicegruffandthreatening.
Hughesnoddedand
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stumbledbackwardafewsteps.“Yes’sir,boss.”
Turningtohistwocompanions,Archercontinuedhisconversation,loweringhisvoice.“Anyway,theonetheysayfoundthemochila,sentitonitsway,thenbroughtthedeadboy’sbodybackwasthekidnamedBar.Iknowwhichoneheis—thelittleshit.I’llbewatchingtheirroomagaintonight.Iguaranteehewon’t
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makeitoutalive.Youtwojustdoyourpart.Waituntildark,thengotothePonyExpressstables,takeoutwhat’shisname—Mario,themanager—thenrunoffallthemhorses.Gotit?”
Thetwomennodded,allthreeslungbackonelastshotofwhiskey,andthenalldepartedontheirseparatemissions.
HugheswatchedasArcherwentupstairsandinto
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hisroom.Then,hurryingoutside,helookedtoseewhichwaythetwoconspiratorswent.Snowcoveredthesidewalk,theirboot-printseasyevidence.Hughesbentintothewind,followingthetwoastheymadetheirwaydownMain,pastWhiskeyStreet,andintothealleybehindMarcum’sApothecaryShoppe.
Sprintingupthesidewalk,Hughesrounded
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thecorner,comingoutthebacksideoftherowofbuildingsattheotherendofthealley,nowwalkingtowardthetwo.Theybothlookedupjustintimetoseefistsbeingplantedsquarelyoneachoftheirnoses,thepunchknockingbothmentotheirknees.Followingupwithkickstothesidesandfiststothebacksoftheirheads,bothmenwereoutcoldbeforetheyknewwhat
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happened.Hughesdraggedthe
pairtothebackporchoftheApothecaryShoppe,thentookthebeltsfromtheirpantsandcinchedthementogether,theirarmswrappedaroundeachotherandacedarsupportpostinalovingembrace.
Walkingbacktothefrontofthestore,Hughesspottedayoungboyinthestreetplayingfetchthestick
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withhisdog.Hetookapaperandpencilfromhiscoatandscratchedanote.
“Son,I’llgiveyouadimetotakethisnotetothesheriff.”
“Awholedime?Forreal?Justtorunanoteupthestreet?”
“Hurry.It’simportant.Offyougo.”
Leavingthesonsofbitchestofreezetodeathinthedirtwaswhathe’dreally
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wantedtodo,hethought,ashehurriedbacktotheSaltLakeHouse.But,thesheriffwouldhavefundecipheringthenoteaboutmailthievesandmurdererswhouseIndiansforscapegoats.Inthelateafternoonglowofthegaslamps,ahardsnowfellinasharpslantagainstthehotel’swindowpanes.Theboot-printshe’dfollowedearlierwerealreadyobscuredunderthemoundingdrifts.
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*****Shakingthesnowfromhisclothesandoffhishat,Hughestookalongdrawofwhiskeyfromhisflask,swishingitaround,thenswallowing,lettingthewarmthseepthroughhisbodyashemadehiswayupthestairs.HebangedonthedoorofthePonyExpressriders’room,shoutingouthisslurredwords,teeteringbackandforth.Hekickedthedoor
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withhisbootedfoot,hopingtodrawtheattentionofthemanintheroomacrossthehall.
“Hey,anybodywannajoinmeforadrink?”Heturnedtheknob,easedthedooropen,andpeeredinsidetheemptyroom.“Idon’twannadrinkalone.Anyonehome?”HeslammedthedoorandstoodthereamomentlongerwhenheheardArcher’sdoorbehindhim
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clickclosed.Smilingtohimself,he
turnedtoArcher’sdoorandbangedwithhisfists.“Mister,wannashareatoast?”
Noanswer.“Hey,mister?”He
bangedonthedooragain.“Allright.Icantakeahint.G’night.”Hughesmadefoot-stompingsoundsasifhewerewalkingaway.Inamoment,heheardshufflingontheothersideofthedoor,then
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theclickofalock,thensawthedoorknobturningslowly.
Thedoorincheditswayopen.Hughesshovedhisshoulderagainstthedoor,pushinghiswayintotheroom.Slammingthedoorshutbehindhimwithhisfoot,hethrewhisweightforward,knockingasurprisedArcherbackwardintoatable,Archerandaceramiclamptopplingtothefloor.
Archergropedbehind
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himandpickeduptheheavylamp.HeswungitasHugheswasbendingoverhim,hittingHughesintheforehead.Stunned,Hughesstumbledbackward,trippingandfallingtohisknees.
Archersprangtohisfeetandracedtothewindow,flingingitopen.Hethrewhimselfoutontothesnow-covered,slopingroof,slidingdown,slippingover,andhangingontotheledgebyhis
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fingers.Climbingoutofthe
window,Hugheseasedhimselfdowntheslopingroof,balancinghisweightagainstagable.Theywereonthebacksideofthehotel,thealleybelowanenclosedpenforcattleinthesummer,inthewinteradepositoryfortheiceandsnowthatshopownersshoveledoffthewalksfrominfrontoftheirstores.
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Archerlookedoverhisshoulderatthejaggedicebelow,thenbackatHughes.“Thedrunkfromthebar.”
“GuessIhandlemyliquorbetterthanyouthought.”HughesreachedoutahandtoArcher,tryingtograbhiscoatsleeve.“I’vegotyourtwopalsallbundledupforthesheriff.I’mtakingyouin,too.”Hestretchedoutfarther,thenfelthisbootslippingofftheice-covered
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woodenshinglesonthegable.Slidingdown,hebracedbothfeetonthegutteredledge,stoppinghisfall.
“Pullmeup,”beggedArcher.“Ican’tholdon.”
Leaninghisweightbackagainsttheroofforleverage,HugheslookedatArcher’sfingersinadeathgripontheroof’sledge,andthenatthefearintheman’seyes.Inonesearingrush,Archer’swordsfromearlier,
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braggingthathewouldkillBarleighbeforethenightwasover,rangloudinhisears.HughesimaginedArcher’sfingersinadeathgriponBarleigh’sneck,oronatrigger,squeezingit,abulletbeingreleasedintoBarleigh,thatsamelookoffearinhereyes.
Hugheshesitated,hishesitationgivingwaytoasimmeringmadness.HesawArcher’smouthmoving,but
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thesoundofhispleaforhelpdidn’tregister,thewordsfallingsilentlylikethesnow.Hughespulledhisrevolverfromitsholster,easedthehammerback,andtookasteadylookatthemanontheotherendofhisgun.Hefelt—nothatred,notrage—butanunflinchingassurednessthatthispersonwhowantedBarleighdeaddidn’tdeservetolive.HeaimedthebarrelbetweenArcher’sfrightened
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eyes.Thesoundofhispulse
beatingloudinhisearsandechoinginhishead,thecoldsweattricklingdownhisforehead,theshakingofhisguninhishand,theunsettledfeelofshallow,fastbreaths—cloudedhisthinking.AvisionofBarleighwatching,waitingtoseeifhe’dchoosewhethertocrossthatfinelinethatseparateshumanityfromthedarksidetuggedathim,
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hoveredoverhim.He’dcrossedthatline
before.Heunderstoodthecostitexacted.
ForHughes,notkillingQuanahParkerwhenhe’dhadthechancehadbeenaneasydecision.Thathadbeenamatterofsurvival,ofself-preservation.NotkillingArcherwentmuchdeeper.Thiswasamatterofpreservinghisownsoul.
Hugheseasedthe
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hammerdownandholsteredhisgun.Hereachedouthishand,grabbingforArcher’scoatsleeve.
“Oh—oh,no—youain’ttakingmein.”GeorgeArcheryankedaway,releasinghisfingertipgripontheroof,kickingoffthewallandflinginghimselfbackward.Helandedwithathudonthefrozengroundbelow.
“Youcrazysonofa
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bitch.”HughespeeredovertheledgeatArcherlyingontheroughice,abrightredhalopoolingaroundhishead,andsnowfallingsilentlyonhismotionlessbody.Helookedupattheopenwindowandthesteepslopeoftheicyroof,thenacrosstherooflineatthegutterrunningdownthesideofthebuilding.Heinchedhiswayacrosstheledge,crawlingdownthegutter,thenloweringhimself
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totheground.Walkingoverto
whereArcherlaysprawledinthesnow,hisbloodacontrastingstainagainsttheicywhitenessbeneathhim,Hughesbentdownandinspectedthebody.Asharpsectionofjaggedicewasembeddedatthebaseofhisskull,theformationprotrudingfromthesnowlikeanicebergpeekingoutofthesea.
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Hugheswroteanoteforthesheriffandleftitwiththebody.
*****Awhiteoutobscuredthesunset.Snowblewsideways.ThedesertedstreetsofSaltLakeCitywerechokedwithafootofsnow,morecomingdownnonstopsinceitbeganjustafterStoney’sfuneral.Hughesstoodatthewindow,watchingforBarleigh.Pacingtheroom.Goingbacktothe
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windowagain,andagain.Whyaren’tyouback?
Ihopeyou’veholedupsomewheresafe.
Somewheresafe.Lessunsafe.
Hespunawayfromthewindow.Grabbinghiscoat,hat,andsaddlebags,rollingupanextrablanket,hemadeaquickstopinthekitchen,stuffingthepouchesfullbeforeheadingforthebarn.Hewascoveredinsnow
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whenhewalkedintohismare’sstall.“Sorrytodothistoyou,Rose,butsomeoneneedsourhelp.”
Feedingthehorseanextrahelpingofoatswhilehecurriedandsaddledher,heputseveralextraportionsintoabagandtieditinsidehisbedroll.Helookedaroundtoseewhatelsehemightneed.Anextrarope.Matches.Watercanteens.Coffee.
Mariocameinfrom
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hisquartersoffthewestsideofthebarn,rubbingsleepfromhiseyes.“Mr.Lévesque,IthoughtIheardsomething.SurewashopingI’dseeBarstandinghere.What’dyoudotoyourforehead?Yougotagooseeggonit.”
“Iranintoalamp.No,it’sjustme,butI’mcertainIknowwheresheisfromthedirectionsherodeafter—”Hughescaughthimself.He
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closedhiseyesanddroppedhischintohischest.“Damnit.AndItoldherIwasthebestkeeperofsecretsshe’deverneed.”
Mariopausedinthedoorway,staringatHughesforalongmoment.“Bringherbacksafeandsound.Goodridersarehardtocomeby.”Hegaveaquickwink,andwentbacktobed.
Snowdriftedhockdeepinplaces,withmostof
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thetrailcoveredinasolidpack.Thewhiteouthaddiminishedtoasteady,heavysnowfallwiththewindgustinginsurpriseattacks,layinglowonemoment,thenextrippingthroughthevalleywithahatefulforce.
Thenormalhour’sridetothesecretcavewherethehotspringsbathsoothedwearyPonyExpressriderstooktwiceaslong.BythetimeHughesdescendedthe
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steepslopeintothelevelgladewhereheandBarleighhadlastpicnicked,hismarewasblowinghardthroughhernostrilsfromexertion,hercoatclumpedwithiceandsnow.
Hughesdismounted,tryingtoquellarisingpanic.Therewerenofootprintsorhoofprintsinthesnow.Noevidenceortraceofhumanorequineactivity.Heturnedaround,listening,tryingto
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getafeelforwhathewashearing.Therewassomething.Thereitwasagain.Asound.Hismarewhinnied,heralertearsprickedforward.
Hekneeledontheground,waiting,listening.Again.There.Astrangeecho.Aclopping.Hoovesstrikingonsolidrock.Smiling,heledhismaredownthenarrowpassageandintothecave.
“Hello,Hughes.I’m
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beyondthepool,upagainstthefarwall.”
“Howdidyouknowitwasme?”
“Yourmarenickeredintheglade.IrecognizedRose’snicker.Shesoundsmorelikeastallion.ItremindsmeofDeal,myhorsebackhome.”
“MaybeI’llgettomeethimsometime.Maywecomein?”
“Please.”
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“I’mslidingyouaboxofmatches.KeeponeburninguntilIgetthishorseunsaddledanddriedoffandwegetourbearings.”
“Ofcourse.”Hughesfumbled
aroundinthesaddlebags,locatedtheboxofmatches,andslidthemtowardBarleigh.“Comingtoyou.”
“Got’em.”Shestruckamatch,thesmellofsulfurfillingtheair,andforan
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instantBarleighsawtheManWhoSeesWithWolfEyesstaringbackather.
ThehorsesateoatssidebysideoffthedampfloorofthecavewhileHughesbuiltasmallfire,usingasstartertheextracottonropehe’dbroughtalong.He’dgatheredanarmloadofoldfallenbranchesfromthepinetreeintheglade,usingsome,settingsomeaside.
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“Icouldn’tleaveheroutinthestorm,”saidBarleigh,gesturingtowardherhorse.“Shewouldhavefrozentodeath.”
“Ablizzard’snoplaceforahorseorawoman.I’dhopedyou’dbehere.”
Thesoftglowofthefirecastliquidshadowsonthewall.HughessatnexttoBarleighandreachedforherhand,butshepulledback.
“Hughes,whenIleft
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Stoney’sfuneral,Iwantedtoclearmymind.IneededtorethinkeverythingIthoughtIknewaboutmyfamilyhistory.Theenormous,suddendetachmentfrommypast—it’sbeyondconfounding.”
“Iunderstand,”hesaid.Heknewwhatitwasliketofeeldetachedfromone’sfamily—atleastfromone’sfather.
“AndpoorStoney—I
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justacheinside—theguiltissuffocatingme.I’mdrowninginsadnessforhim,forme,formymother,butI’mafraidifIletgoofit,ifIgivevoicetoit,it’llliveonforeverintheair,somewhereoutthere,andwillcomecirclingbacktohauntme,’roundand’roundtheglobe,likeanastywind.”
Barleighstoodupandpacedaroundthefire,walkingovertowherethe
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horsesstoodmunchingtheiroats.“Iwanttoscreamtillmythroat’sraw,totearmyhairout,myheartout,anythingtofeelaworsepainthanI’mfeelinginside.”
“Youcanshoutitalloutandit’llgonofurtherthanthiscave.Getridofit.Leaveitinthiscavern.”
“How?Howisthatpossible?”Barleighbegantoshake,theemotionsofthelasttwodaysandthelackof
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sleepoverwhelmingher.Hughesstood,
removedhisbootsandgunbelt,slidoutofhistrousers,tookhisvestandshirtoff,andpiledeverythingnexttohissaddlebags.Inhislongjohnsandbarefeet,hewalkedtowhereBarleighstoodwiththehorses,holdingouthishandforher.
“Whatareyoudoing?”
“I’mgoingtoshow
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youhowtogetridofyoursadness,howtoleaveithereinthecave.”
“Hughes,I’mnot—”shestammered,shrinkingawayfromhim.
“Don’tbesilly.It’snotwhatyou’rethinking.It’spurelyinnocent.Takemyhand.Trustme.”Heheldouthishand,waiting.
Shehesitatedamoment,thentookit.Hehelpedherremoveherclothes
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downtoherlongjohns,thenledhertothepool,andtogethertheyslippedintothewarmwaterofthehotsprings.
ThewatercameuptothelevelofhischestbutwasoverBarleigh’shead;sheclungtotheledge.“Letgo,”hesaid.“Trustme.”
Sheletgooftheledge.
Withahandoneithersideofherwaist,holdingher
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atarm’slength,Hughesmotionedforhertoholdherbreathandfollowhim.Theyduckedbelowthesurface.Theintensityoftheheatonherfaceshockedher.Sheresurfaced,clingingtohisneck,gaspingforair.
“Nexttime,you’llbeusedtoit.Whenyougounder,scream.Letitallout.Scream.Shout.Curse.Releasealltheanguishyouhaveinside.Getridofall
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that’shurtingyou.”Barleighnoddedher
understanding.“Waterwillholdthe
sound—yourwords,yourpain—andnotletlooseofit.Everythingyougivetothewater,it’llholdforever.”Heheldhisbreath,andshedid,too.
Heheldontoher,andtogethertheyslippedbelowthesurface.Barleighscreamed,cursed,yelled,
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tightfistedandkicking,Hughes’shandsaroundherwaistkeepinghersteady.Whenshecouldholdherbreathnomore,shepushedoffofhim,risingandgulpingairintoherlungs.Then,shedovebelow,andagainheheldhersteady,lettinghershoutouthergrief,releasingitintothewater.
Shedovebelow,againandagain,untilshewasspentphysicallyandemotionally,
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havingnothingmoretorelease,nothingmoretogivetothewater.Thelasttime,insteadofpushingoffofhimformoreair,shecollapsedinhisarms.
Heswamtothesideofthepool,placingBarleighontheledge.Shelaystillandquiet,steamrisingoffherbody.Hugheseasednexttoher,rubbingherback,massaginghershoulders,waitinguntilshewasreadyto
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speak.Longmomentspassed
beforeBarleighsatup,danglingherfeetinthewater.“IfeellikeI’vepurgedsomethingpoisonousfrommybody.Ifeelbetter.Thankyou.”
“I’mglad,”hesaid,relievedtoseetherelaxedexpressiononherface.
“Todwellonthepastcan’thelpmenow.It’sdone.Butforthepresent,I’m
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starved.Ihopeyoubroughtoneofyourfancypicnicswithyou.”
Theysatontheedgeofthepool,sippingwineandeatingdriedfruitfromwhatHughesconfiscatedfromthekitchen.HisstandardfineembroideredlinensandengravedpewterplateswithmatchinggobletsmadeBarleighsmile.
“Asforthefuture,I’vedecidedtogobackto
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Texas.Ihaveababysisterwhoneedsme.WhoknowsbetterthanIdowhatachildneedswhodoesn’thaveamothertoraiseit?”
“Whataboutus,Barleigh?DoIfitintoyourfuture?”heasked,feelingamixtureofreliefanduncertainty.
“YousaidyouwereleavingforCalifornia.Ithoughtyoudidn’twanttoworryaboutanyonebut
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yourself.Especiallynotaboutme.”Barleighhesitated,thenlookedupintohiseyes.“Doyouwanttofitintomyfuture?”
“God.Morethananything,ifyou’llletme.”
Hughesloweredhimselfintothepool,takingBarleighbythehand,easingherintothewarmwater.Hesatherontheledgethatlayjustbelowthesurface.“Iwanttheluxuryofworrying
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aboutyou.I’llhangupmybadgeforever.I’llwalkawayfromeverythingtofitintoyourfuture.”
“Myfuture’snotgoingtobeveryexciting,raisingmybabysisterandrebuildingtheranch.Yourlifeissothrilling,so—”
“AllthethrillIneedisseeingyouwakeupnexttomeeverymorning.”Hetookherfaceinhishandsanddrewhertohim,kissingher
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mouth,relievedtofinditwilling,seekinghim,wantinghim.
Herkisseswerehungry,herarmsandhandsandfingersexcitedandeagertotouch,tofeel,toexplore,tobeexplored.Shewantedmore.Standingontheledge,sheunfastenedherlongjohns,peeledthemdown,andsteppedoutofthem.
Hughessuckedinhisbreath,hiseyesfeastingon
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herwet,nakedbody.“MyGod,you’rebeautiful.”Hesteppedoutofhislongjohns,tossingthemoutofthepool.Reachingoutforher,holdingontoher,heloweredherintothewater.
“Hughes—”Barleighwrappedherlegsaroundhim,entwiningherarmsaroundhisneck,lettinghimkissherwhereverhewanted,givingherbodytohim.
“Barleigh,”he
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groaned,kissingandtastingeveryinchofherexposedbodythatwasabovethewater’ssurface,hishandsexploringtherest.
Shewhisperedagainsthisear,kissingthewords,caressingeachoneintoplacewithherlips.“Iwantyoutomakelovetome.”
Hugheswassureofwhathewanted—hisbodywassure.
“Yourstrength,”he
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said,kissingher,“andyourbeauty,”hetastedhermouthagain,“shattersme.Youreyestakemeapartandputmebacktogether,abetterversionthanbefore.”Hebrushedhislipsacrosshers,thenkissedheragain,longanddeepandslow,cuppingherfaceinhishands.“FromthefirsttimeIsawyou,IknewyoucouldturnmyworldupsidedownandI’dstandonmyheadgladly.”
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“You’vesetmyworldspinningbackonitsaxis.”Shetracedherlipsdownfromhismouth,overhischin,kissingthesmalldipatthebaseofhisneck.
“Haveyouever—?Areyoua—?”
“No,I’venever—.Yes,I’ma—.”
“Marryme.Tomorrow.Ican’ttakesomethingfromyouthatyoucannevergetback.Ifyou
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won’tmarryme,thenno,Iwon’tmakelovetoyou.”Hekissedheragain,hisbodyhotandwantinghers.
“It’snotjusta‘want.’I’vediscoveredwhatIneed.IknewthefirsttimeImetyoutherewassomethingdifferent,somethingspecialaboutyou,thoughmanytimesIpushedyouaway.Notanymore.Makelovetome.”
Shewrappedherarmsaroundhisneck,herlegs
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tighteraroundhiswaist,pullinghimtoher,kissinghim,tastingthewineonhismouth.Thehotmineralwatersloshedaroundthem,overtheirheads,outofthepoolandontothegranitefloorastheytwirledandsplashed,theirbodiesentangling,clingingtooneanother.
Hughesheldback,lettingBarleighmoveatherownpace.Steamroseoffthesurfaceofthewater,offof
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theirbodies.Barleigh,clutchingandgasping,screamedoutHughes’snamewhilethewindshowlingthroughthecanyonscalledouttospiritsandghosts.
Thefireplayedout.Shadowsfaded.Snowdriftedintothecavefromthecrevasseaboveandmeltedonthewarmfloor.HughesliftedBarleighfromtheedgeofthesteamingpoolandloweredherontotheblanket.He
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coveredherwithhiscoatbeforecheckingonthehorsesandgivingthemanotherhandfulofoatsandwarmedwaterfromthemeltedsnow.
Whenhereturned,shewassittingup.“HowcanImarryyou?PeoplethinkI’maboy.”
“Noteveryone.”“Whatdoyou
mean?”“Ispilledthebeans.
I’msorry.Itslippedout.If
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Mariohadanysuspicions,Ierasedalldoubt.”Hughesofferedanapologeticsmile.
“Hecanbethepreacher.Heusedtobeone,anyway,beforehiringonwiththeExpress,butnoteveryoneknows.Hefeltprivateaboutthat.”Barleighyawnedandstretched,thensighedadeepsighofrelief.
“Iguessthatmeansyou’regoingtomarryme.”Hugheslookeddownather,
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waitingforananswer,butshewasfastasleep.
*****AjoltstartledBarleighfromherdreams.Shesatupstraight.“Hughes?”
“I’mhere.Nightmare?”Hemovedheroffhisarm,whichhadfallenasleep.
“Sorry,Imadeadroolpuddle.”Shewipedawaytheshallowpoolofdroolonhischest.“Ouch—what
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happenedhere?”Shetouchedhisforeheadwithherfingertips,afleetingpanicseizingher,wonderingifitwassomethingshe’ddoneintheheatofdeliriouspassion.
“Iranintoalamp.Sortof.Itknockedsomesenseintome,though.MademerealizehowmuchIworryaboutyou.Thatit’saluxuryIlookforwardto,and...thatIloveyou.”
Barleighshiftedonto
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herelbow,proppingherheadinherhand.“I’msorry—Ijustnownoticedit.Iwokeupwiththisthought,andIhadtoshareit.”
“AreyouignoringthatIsaidIloveyou?”
“Yesandno.I’llhavetogetusedtothatword.Isthatallright?”
“Yes.And,ifIwakeupeverymorningwithyoudroolingonmychest,everything’llbeallright.”
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Hughesyawned,thensaid,“So,what’sthethoughtyouhavetoshare?”
“Itcouldn’thavebeenQuanahthatraidedourranch.PapasaidhesawwarriorswatchingfromtheridgedaysbeforeBirdiegavebirth.QuanahwasinSanAntonioonthosedays,accordingtoyourencounterwithhim.”
“That’sright,”Hughessaid.“Hewas.”
“Thenightofourraid,
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hewouldhavehadtohavetraveledhundredsofmilestohavebeenpresentforthatevent.Evenifhewastherethenightoftheactualraid,thatFridaynightthewheelswerealreadyinmotion.Itwouldhavehappenedanyway,withorwithoutQuanah.”
“Youcouldberight,”hesaid,consideringthepossibilities.
“Eitherway,you’re
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notresponsible.Pleasedon’tletthateatawayatyou.Leavethoseguiltyfeelingshereinthecave,too.”
Hughestookherinhisarms,histenderkissgrowingmorepassionate,urgent,anddeep.“Iloveyou,BarleighFlanders.You’llhavetogetusedtohearingthat.Whatdidyoumean,earlier,thatyou’vediscoveredwhatyouneed?”
“AconversationwithMissMaeve.Shetoldmeto
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keeplookinguntilIfoundwhatIneededinlife.I’vefoundit.”Barleighfeltarushofhappiness,ofpeace,lyinginhisarms.
“Thatmakesmeahappyman.WhatelsedidMaevetellyou?”
Barleighblushed.Thememoryofthatday’sconversationbroughtaflushtoherskin.She’dlearnedthatthereweremanydifferentwaysamanandawomancan
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findintimatepleasurewitheachother’sbodies.
“IhadlotsofquestionsforMissMaeve,andshewasgenerouswithheranswers,”Barleighsaid,aslowsmilespreadingacrossherface.
“Remindmetosendherageneroustipandathankyouwhenwegetback.”
“Onedaysoon,wecanexplorethoseways,butrightnowIwantyoutomake
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lovetomeagain.”Shepressedherbodyagainsthis.Herurgentkisses,fingerscaressinghim,strokinghim,teasinghim,gavehimalltheencouragementneeded.
Hetookher,tookwhatsheoffered.Thistime,hishungerforherbodyconsumedhim,theurgetopleaseheragaindrivinghimwild.Whathe’ddeniedhimselfthefirsttimehe’dmadelovetoherinthepool,
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hewouldnot,couldnot,denyhimselfnow.Holdingnothingback,whenhefeltthemomentofBarleigh’spleasure,heletlooseofhispassionwithascorchingwave,sendingheatpulsingthroughbothofthem.
“MyGod,woman.”HewrappedBarleighinhisarmsasshelayonhischest.“Thatcouldsendaweakermantohisdeath.Anditwouldn’tbeashamefulway
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todie.”Wrappedineach
other’sarms,theylayinthedarknessofthecave,breathingeachother’sbreath,facetoface,lipsbrushing,eyelashestickling.Outside,thesnowhadstopped,cloudsopenedtothedarknessbehindthem,andstarstooktheirrightfulplaceinthevelvetsky.
*****Barleighawoketothe
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whisperedwords“Iloveyou”spokensoftlyagainstherear,Hughes’shandstrokingherhair.
“Iloveyou,too,”shewhispered.
“I’vebeenwatchingyousleep,andI’vebeenthinking.”
“Uh-oh.Snoringagain?MamaGrizzlyinhercave?”
Helaughed.“No—nosnoring.I’vehearditsaidthat
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lovegroundsus.Idisagree.Isayloveuprootsus.Lovingyouhascausedmetowanttochangethingsaboutmyself,tobemorelikewhoIknowmytrueselftobe.Whatdoyouthink?”
Whatdidshethink?Barleighrolledover,restingherheadagainstHughes’schest,listeningtothesoundofhisheartthumping,thesoundofwaterdrippingdownthewallsofthecave,tothe
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horsesmovingabout,tothesoundofherownbreathandpulsecombinedwithhis.
“Ithinkwithlove,uncertaintyisguaranteed—thatloveoffersnoguarantees.That’swhatmakesitvaluable,whatmakesitworthtakingariskatanycost.I’mjustafraid.”
“Loveisworththerisk.But,whatareyouafraidof?”heasked,kissingthetipsofherfingers.
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“ThatthepeopleIgivemyheartto,thepeopleIlove,alldiebeforeI’mreadytoletgo,”shesaidsoftly,notwantingtogivepowertothewordsorthethought.
“Cashinginyourfearandlettinggoofyourheartisthehighcostofhope,mydear.Hopeiswhatfuelsthefireoflove.Areyouwillingtocashinyourfears,andletgoofyourheart?”
Barleighglancedat
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themanshelaywith,felthisarmsholdingherclose,andsheconsideredthisquestionandallthatitmeant—thethingsthatshefeared,whatshemightloseifsheletgoofherheart,whatshemightgainifshedid.
“Iam.AndI’mneverlookingback.”
*****AnoticeintheSaltLakeCityDeseretNews,theSanAntonioSentinel,andtheNew
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OrleansTribunalread:
HughesPierceLévesqueofNewOrleans,LouisianaandSanAntonio,Texas,andMissBarleighAlexandriaHenriettaFlandersofPaloPinto,TexasandSaltLakeCity,UtahTerritory,weremarriedinholymatrimonyon
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Thursday,November28th,1860.OfficiatingwasReverendMarioRussooftheCentralOverlandCaliforniaandPikesPeakExpressCompany.Thebrideworeawhitelacegownwithbeadedpearlaccents,andsurprisedherguestswithadisplayofWesternbootsand
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spursasherfootwearofchoice.Inlieuofabridalveil,sheworeabrightyellowMexicansombrerotrimmedingoldandblackaccents.OfficialreceptiontofollowattheMengerHotel,SanAntonio,Texas.Detailstofollow.
“Getyourridinggear
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ready—I’vegottogetyoutoTexas”wereHughes’sfirstwordsforhisbride,afterthe“Idos”hadbeensaid.
*****ThestagecoachpulledintoSanAntonio,Texas,atnoononNewYear’sEve,thetowndecoratedinfestiveholidaycolors.Barleighpulledthetelegramfromherreticule,thesmalldecoratedbagaChristmasgiftfromHugheswhenthey’dstopped
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overnightinthetownshipofDallas.Sheheldthefragilepaperthatwastornatthecreasesfromthewearandtearoffoldingandunfoldingit.
ShelookedupatHughes,feelingtheweightofhisstare.“Ijustwanttoreaditagain,”shesaid,castinghereyesdownatthetelegram.
Tryingtokeeptheanxietythathadbeenhauntingherfrombuilding,
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sheconcentratedoneachword.Hermother’sconditionhadworsened,Jameson’stelegramhadsaid,andtimewasoftheessenceiftheywishedtomakeareunionpossible.Thetelegramwasalmostfifteendaysold.
Havingsaidtheirgood-byestoMarioafterheperformedthequicknuptialsinSaltLakeCity,Hugheshadsentthreetelegrams,onetoJameson,onetoWinnifred
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Justin,andonetoLeighselle.He’daskedallthreetorespondassoonaspossible,andtosendtheirrepliestotheofficeinSaintJoseph,Missouri,whereheandBarleighwouldbecatchingastagecoachforSanAntonio.
“IfLeighsellestilldoesn’twanttoseeyou,andIcan’timaginehernotwantingto,afterItellherournews,then,we’llhavetoacceptherdecision,”he’dsaid.“ButI’m
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goingtodomydamnedesttoseethatyouandyourmotherarereunited.”
AfteronelastnightattheSaltLakeHouseHotel,BarleighsleepingintheroomontheothersideofthewallfromtheroomreservedforExpressriders,theymadeafinalstopattheMercantile.WhileBarleighpurchasedsupplies,HughesarrangedforagifttobedeliveredtoMarioRusso,thesignaturecard
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reading,“Ihopethesewoolieswillkeepyourtoeswarmformanywinterstocome.”Then,offtheywent,ridinghardforSaintJoe.Theychangedponiesattheexpressstations,retracingbackwardBarleigh’sandStoney’sfirstrideintoUtahTerritory.
*****Winnifred’stelegramread:
Congratulationsmydarlings.Ishall
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headtoSanAntoniowithStarlingandbepreparedtostayseveralweeks.WillbeleavingHogMountainRanchinEsperanza’sandJulio’scapablehands.ShouldbeinSanAntoniobyChristmas.WillsendtelegramtoJamesonattheMengerHotelasyouinstructed.
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Love,AuntWinnie.Jameson’stelegram
read:Mybesttothe
happycouple.Unfortunately,MissBeauclaire’sconditionworsenseachday.Timeisoftheessenceifareunionispossible.I’vereceivedMrs.Justin’stelegramandhavesecuredaroom
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forheradjacenttoMissBeauclaire’s.DoHurry.Leighselle’stelegram
wastheoneBarleighlingeredover.Reread.Foldedandunfolded,overagain.Shesilentlymouthedthewords“Iloveyou,Mother”toseehowtheyfeltinhermouth,inhermind.Eachtimeshespokethewords,theybecamemoreapartofher,takingrootinherheart,growingafraction
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witheachbeatandpulse.Hughesleaned
forward,liftingherchin,seekingBarleigh’seye.“Darling,sayitaloud.Practicehowitfeelstohearthemspoken.”
“Notyet.Idon’twanttojinxanything.”Barleighsmoothedthepaperonherlapandreaditagain.
Leighselle’smessageread:
I’msohappy
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forbothofyou.Howveryperfect.Hughes,IunderstandwhyyoutoldBarleigh.Yes,youHADto!Ishouldneverhaveaskedyounottointhefirstplace.Iwishfornothingbuttogettoseeheragain,togettoholdheragain,beforeIleavethisworldbehind.Shesoundslikea
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remarkableyoungwoman.TellherthatIloveher,havelovedheralways,untilIcantellhermyself,face-to-face.I’mdoingmybesttohangon.Pleasedoyourverybesttohurry.
*****TheMengerHotelwascongestedwithhordesofpeopleintownfortheholidayseason.Hughestook
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Barleigh’shandandledherthroughthecrowdedlobbyfulloffestivefolksinhighspirits,pasttheshinyblackgrandpiano,andtowardthebackstairwell.Takingthemtwoatatime,hepulledheralongwithhim.TheburgundyandpinkfloralcarpetingmuffledthesoundoftheirfeetastheyrandownthehalltowardHughes’soldroom,theroomLeighsellenowkept.
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Standingbeforethedoor,HugheslookedatBarleighandsaid,“Areyoureadyforthis?”
Sheleanedpasthimandpoundedonthedoor.“Whatdoesthattellyou?”Shesmiledathim.“Yes.I’mready.”
Afteralongpause,Hughesknockedagain.“Hello?”
Theywaited,theireyesmeeting,holding,then
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separating.Hughesknockedon
thedoor,moreinsistent,speakingintothecrackofthedoorframe.“Leighselle?Areyouinthere?”
Barleighstoodnexttohim,aglovedhandpressedtohermouth.
Hughesputahandonthedoorknobandturned.Itopened.Hepushedthedoorintothecold,darkroomthatsmelledoflavenderandlye.
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Hesteppedinside,lookingaround,takingnoteofwhathewasseeing,ofwhathewasnotseeing.
Easingoutintothehallway,heturnedtoBarleigh,shakinghishead.“Thebed’sbeenstripedtothemattress.Nocoalsorashesinthefireplace.Itsmellsofrubbingalcoholandlyesoap.Thisroom’sbeenvacantforawhile.”
“Afterallwedidto
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gethere,andwe’retoolate.”Tearsrolleddownhercheeks.
“Darling,I’msosorry,”hesaid,swallowinghard,holdingbackhisownemotion.
“Wedidn’tmakeitintime.Iknewit.IknewassoonasIgaveintothenotionoflovingherthatshe’d,she’d....”
Hughestookherinhisarmsandheldhertight
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againsthischest.“I’msosorry,mylove.”
“Ishouldhavesaiditaloud.Ishouldhavesetthewordsfree,thatIlovedher.Then,theywouldbeouttherefloatingaroundsomewhere,andmightfindtheirwaytoher.”BarleighpulledherfaceintoHughes’slapelsandsobbed.
“Let’sgofindJamesonandWinnie,”hesaid,kissingthetopofher
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head.“I’msorry.IhatethatIdidn’tgetyouheresooner.”Heclosedthedoorbehindthem.
Theylookedintotheroomnextdoor,afterknockingandgettingnoanswer.Barleighrecognizedthecoatandhatononebed,andonthefloorwasababy’sdoll.
“Well,atleastweknowAuntWinnieandStarlinghavearrived.I
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wonderwheretheyare.”BarleighpickedupStarling’sdoll,placingitontheotherbed.
“It’slunchtime.Let’sheaddowntotheColonialRoom,ifwedon’tfindJamesoninhisroomfirst.”
Jamesondidn’tanswertheknockathisdoor,soBarleighandHughesmadetheirwaytothecrowdedColonialRoom.Tablesofjovialhotelguestsfilledthe
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roomwithboisterousconversationsandbrightlaughterwhilediningonasumptuousfeast.
“Idon’tseeAuntWinnie,”saidBarleigh,glancingaroundtheroom.
Hughesturnedaroundinaslow,completesweepoftheroom,eyeingeachtable.“Jamesonisn’there,either.Perhapsthey’vechosenthepatio.”HeputhishandonBarleigh’sbackandsteered
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hertowardthesidedoor.Sunshinepoked
throughthickpalmfrondsthathoveredoverthepatio,creatingasoftandinvitingshade,thewintertemperatureinSanAntoniostillpleasantforoutdoordining.Atthefarthestendandawayfromthedoor,Hughesspottedatable.Whitepressedlinenclothsandsilverbutlerservicegleamed.Crystalglassessparkled.Afloral
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arrangementwasplacedinthecenter,thecandleawaitingtheneedforafire.
Jameson,withhisbacktothewallforobservingthecomingsandgoingsofothers,stoodandwavedthemoverassoonashesawHughes.
ToJameson’sleftandrightsattwowell-dressedwomen,oneholdinganinfant,theothersippingfromasugar-rimmed,cut-crystal
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glassoflemonade,withaninfusionofdarkamberliquidswirlingthroughout.Bothwomenlookedupandsmiled.
Barleigh’sbreathcaughtinherthroat.ShereachedforHughes’shand,buthereyeswereonthefrail,thinwomansittingatthetableacrossfromAuntWinniewhowassippingthelemonade.Thedelicatewoman,whosesmile,finefeatures,andcat-likeeyes
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mirroredherown,heldStarlingagainsthershoulder,pattingthebaby’sback,ahalf-emptybottleofmilkonthetable.
“That’sher.That’smymother,”saidBarleigh,knowing,notasking.
“Indeed,sheis.LeighselleBeauclairehassurprisedmeyetagain,”hesaid,hiseyescrinklingatthecornersashesmiled.
Whilethecrowdof
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festiveholidaytravelersdinedontheiropulentfeastsandthewaitstaffboreplatesandtraysoffoodanddrinktoandfromtables,abeamingHughesLévesquetookhiswifebythehand,andtogethertheymadetheirwaytothetableatthefarendofthesun-drenchedpatio.
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Acknowledgments
Whilethisbookisaworkoffictionandthecharactersarefigmentsofmyimagination,theswingstationsandhomestationsmentionedareaccurateaccordingtothePonyExpressroute,andtwoactualridersarementionedbyname,EaganandHaslan.Theexperiencesmycharactersendurealongthe
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PonyExpresstrailarefabricated;however,somemirrorpurportedfactualevents,suchasthewolfscenewheretheriderwassavedbybuglinghishorntofrightenawaypredators.Effortstocensorthemail,tamperwiththemail,andstealthemailwereabundantduringtheprewaryears;however,theconspiracyspecificallytargetingPresidentLincoln’sletterstoCaliforniabeganas
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aseedofmyimaginationandgrewintoanactualplot.
Researchforthisbookwasmadeeasybytwovaluableandenjoyableresources:ThePonyExpressTrail:YesterdayandToday,byWilliamE.Hill,andOrphansPreferred,byChristopherCorbett.IkeptMr.Hill’sbookopenandonmydeskforthreeyearsandwouldrefertoitmanytimesforhisinvaluableinsight
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regardingparticularstationsandtrailconditionsalongtheroute.And,inanNPRinterviewabouthisbookOrphansPreferred,Mr.Corbett’swordsfueledmyimaginationwhenhesaid:“ThehistoryofthePonyExpressisrootedinfact,butlayeredinfiction.”Hearinghisinterviewspurredmetodotwothings:purchasehisbook,whichwasafunandfascinatingread,andthenit
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motivatedmetothrowmyownhatintheringandaddanotherlayertothefictionandthemythofthePonyExpress.
Alongwiththeabovementionedbooks,IfoundotherinformativeliteraturethroughtheSaintJoseph(Missouri)Convention&VisitorsBureau,thePonyExpressMuseum,andwww.ponyexpress.organdwww.xphomestation.com.
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WhileresearchinghistoricaldataonQuanahParkerandtheComancheraidsinNorthTexas,IcameacrossS.C.Gwynne’sEmpireoftheSummerMoon:QuanahParkerandtheRiseandFalloftheComanches,theMostPowerfulIndianTribeinAmericanHistory.Imusthavereaditatleastfourtimes,andthenkeptithandywhenIneededareminderofthebrutalityoflifeonthe
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westernfrontier.AlthoughIampart
NativeAmericanIndian(maternalgreat-grandmotherwasfull-bloodedCherokeeandpaternalgreat-grandmotherwasfull-bloodedBlackfoot),Idon’tpretendtospeakanynativetongue.TheLakotaSiouanlanguageIusedformybookwastakenfromTheFullTextoftheLahcotah:DictionaryoftheSiouxLanguage,
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UniversityofPittsburghLibrarySystem,authorsJ.K.Hyer,W.S.Starring,andCharlesGuerreu(originallyprintedin1866—notincopyrightandnolongerinprint).Icross-checkedthisinformationwithwww.native-languages.org.BecauseofthemanydialectsoftheSiouanlanguage,IwantedtomakesurethewordsIchosewerecorrect.IapologizetoanyNative
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AmericanifI’venotdoneanaccuratejob—pleaseemailme—I’dvalueyourcoachingforfuturemanuscripts.
ThoughthePonyExpressoperatedforlessthantwoyears,itwasduringacriticaltimeinAmerica’shistory,andboththeponiesandtheriderscapturedourimaginationsandourhearts.We’restillwriting(andreading)storiesaboutthemmorethan150yearslater.
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ANoteFromtheAuthor
Thisisthe“ThankYou”page—themostimportantpageofthebook.Thenwhyisitattheback?Iseeitasbeingatthebottomofapileofpages,holdingeverythingupthat’sontop.Because,withoutallthepeopleIhavetothankwho’vehelpedmeandwho’veencouragedmealong
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theway,thisbookwouldn’thavelegstostandon.
Tomyearlyreaders,ReneeJordan,MeggElliott,BeverlyHelton,andSusanBertram,Ioweallofyoumuchthanks,manysushidinners,bottomlesswineandendlesschocolate,andmoregratitudethanIcandescribe.
Tomyadorablefather-in-lawTheodorLukas,whosefirstlanguageisGerman,thankyouforbeing
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myfirst“official”readerandpurchaser.Hearingyourlaughterandseeingyourtearsasyoureadshowedmethatagoodstorytranscendslanguagebarriers.
TomydearfriendInesEishen,whosewordsofencouragementwhenIwasyourstudentandyouweremyEnglishLiteratureandCreativeWritingprofessorgavemethecouragetofollowmydream,grazie.I’m
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gratefulforourlastingfriendship—itfeedsmysoul.
ToCarolDawson,author,editor,andcourageousleaderofthesummereditingretreatinAlpine,Texas,sponsoredbytheWriters’LeagueofTexas.Thankyouforyourkindhonesty.Ithurtcuttingmyfirsttwenty-fivebeautifullywritten,eloquent,poeticpages,butyouweresoright.“Gettothenitty-gritty,”you
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said.Yesma’am.ToSaraKocekand
DavidArethaatYellowBirdEditors,thankyousomuchforyourexpertiseinpolishingmymanuscriptandinadvisingmewithyourstraightforwardanswerstomymanyquestions.Ican’timaginehavingamorepositive,professionalexperienceduringtheediting,revising,andrewritingprocess.I’mlookingforward
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toournextcollaboration.ToGaryB.Haley,my
oldhighschoolchum,thankyouforyoureagleeyedproofingandcritiquing.GaryistheaccomplishedauthorofthenovelTheAttunement,afast-pacedthrillerreminiscentoftheJasonBournestories.
ToBaron,Ryan,Angie,Malachi,Erik,Marla,Miriam,andKrista,Iloveyouall.Now,someonepleasepoptheAlmondage!
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*****Andtoyoumydearreaders,Ioffermysinceregratitudefortakingthetimetoreadmybook.Ihopeyouenjoyedthestoryandcharacters,andperhapslearnedsomethingnewabouttheAmericanwestandthePonyExpress.Ifyoufeelsoinclined,pleaseleaveareviewontheOrphanMoonAmazon.compageandonGoodreads.ForGoodreads,youcanfollow
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thelinkprovided.ForanAmazonreview,justscrolltotheendofthebookandAmazonprovidesaconvenientreviewcapabilityrightonyourKindleorKindlereaderapp.YourreviewisinvaluableandprovidesthefeedbackIneedtobecomebetteratmycraft.Youcanalsoleavefeedbackonmywebsiteatwww.TKLukas.comandattheOrphanMoonFacebook
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page.Ifyouwouldliketoreceiveperiodicupdatesaboutmyprojectsandexcerptsofworksinprogress,includingbookstwoandthreeofOrphanMoon,pleaseleaveyournameandemailaddressatthefollowinglink:http://www.tklukas.com/contact-me-newsletter.YoucanlookforbookstwoandthreeoftheOrphanMoontrilogyin2016.
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AbouttheAuthor
T.K.Lukas,anaccomplishedequestrianandauthoroftheaward-winningcontemporaryshortfictionOfMurder,Mayhem,andMagnolias,liveswithherhusbandonasmallranchinruralPaloPintoCountyinNorthCentralTexas.Theirthreegrownchildrenarescatteredacrosstheglobe.Alongwith
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internationaltravel,sheandherhusbandenjoyspendingasmuchtimeaspossibleridingtheirhorsesthroughthewoods,takingtheirdogsforwalks,andwatchingtheirBeltedGallowaycattlegetfat.Sheiscurrentlyworkingonthesecondbookinthe“OrphanMoon”trilogy.Visitheratherwebsitewww.TKLukas.comandattheOrphanMoonFacebookpage.
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Theauthorwithherappaloosamare,HollywoodJackieGN.“Holly”isthecovergirlforthebook.Youcanseehowthecoverart
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wentfromaphotographtothefinalmasterpiece,anoriginaloilonwoodpanel,byvisiting:http://www.orphanmoon.net
OriginalcoverartbyrenownedTexasartistSharonMarkwardt.http://www.sharonmarkwardt.com