LENT/EASTER TIME 2019

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Loss and Renewal“May we invite God into our losses and ourgrief, trusting that the Spirit is re-creating beauty through the fragile threads of our lives and our loves.”

– Lisa Washio-Collette

New Camaldoli Hermitage

Thoughts from the EditorLisa Benner, Oblate OSB Cam.

It’s been a tender year for the newsletter team. When we began the discussions for this issue, the theme to which we consistently returned was “loss.” The Hermitage community of course had its share of loss—personal, through the deaths of Fr. Robert and Br. Gabriel; and physical, in terms of continued pres-sure on the access roads and drive-way. Our team also experienced many personal losses: some agonizingly painful, others less so but still enough to give us pause. And of course, we are all bombarded with daily events in our country and world which remind us of the pain, suffering and vanishment that so many experience daily.

In this season of Lent, we remain mind-ful, through scriptures, about what Jesus went through as He faced losses and defeats. His friends abandoned him, He was an outcast in his com-munity, His allies deserted him, yet He persevered, in hope and trust.

But it doesn’t stop there. We know the rest of the story. Out of that abandon-ment comes recovery, from that loss comes renewal, from decay blossoms growth, from death emerges resurrec-tion. For this is our Christian inheritance, the Paschal mystery—this dying and rising—that we are awaiting, promised and seek. Which is why in the end, our team realized that no exploration of loss would be complete without an equal emphasis on growth.

Prior Cyprian’s essay reflects on this critical duality—boththe difficult days he experienced in the last year and the hope and love that eventually got him through. He reminds us that, ultimately, hope is a choice on our part: something that springs from within us through Grace, and not somedistant, external aspiration.

Fr. Isaiah and oblate Matt Fisher pay loving homage to Robert and Gabriel, two beloved monks who passed in the latter part of 2018, and who will be remembered for their gentle presences and prayerful inspiration.

Lia Huber’s essay is thoughtful and heartfelt in how it looks both inward and outward in its exploration of loss and growth. She shares how nature has been an inspiration to her and how it has served as a mirror for her own journey. In the seasons of this earth, she has found mirrors of her own soul seasons. At times parched and stark, sometimes blossoming and full—this has applied to both the natural world and her life’s path. She reminds us to stay with those

In This Issue2 Thoughts from the Editor Lisa Benner, Oblate OSB Cam. 3 Faith, Hope, and Love Cyprian Consiglio, OSB Cam.

4 Primacy Aaron Maniam, Oblate OSB Cam.

5 Tending to the Soil of Our Soul Lia Huber 6 A Christian Response to Gun Violence Phil McManus, Oblate OSB Cam.

8 Br. Gabriel Kirby Obituary Fr. Isaiah Teichert, OSB Cam.

9 Fr. Robert Hale Obituary Matt Fisher, Oblate OSB Cam.

10 The Beauty of Vulnerability Lisa Washio-Collette, Oblate OSB Cam.

11 Abounding Grace Debi Lorenc

12 Helpful Blessings—the Maintenance Crew Jill Gisselere

13 Preached Retreats for 2019

14 Activities and Visitors

15 What the Monks Are Reading

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changing seasons no matter how lifeless and slow things might seem, because there is always new growth happen-ing, quite literally under our feet—waiting to present itself when the time is right.

Several of our essays look outward at the cycles of loss and growth beyond the Hermitage. Over the last few months, I have received several requests to address this ongoing

issue. In this country, we hear about—often daily—occurrences of random shootings and killings by people using guns. Innocent lives lost due to others’ rageful violence. It seems to be the new epidemic and leaves many of us wondering, how did we get here and how do we pro-ceed? Can there be redemption in these situations? Is hope possible? Phil McManus presents us with an interesting essay about the conceiv-able origins of this issue and how we can all come together, in our own ways, to be part of a solution. Though not an easy issue to think—much less write—about, Phil’s reflections underscore how these conversations and healthy dialogue can catalyze the healthy growth and healing that are so needed right now.  Lent is a season in the Church that offers us the opportunity to wait, to watch, and to reflect. During this time in the liturgical calendar—aswell as the Lenten times in our life—may we bow deeply and humbly to these moments that might be filled

with loss or death. Then, may we be filled with confident hope about what awaits us—the kind of joy, love, and peace that can be possible through Christ. Whichever season you may be in, we hope that this issue brings you something to contemplate and be comforted by.

Faith, Hope, and Love Cyprian Consiglio, OSB Cam. I think the lowest point of the summer of 2018 was August 11.

We had already been through Robert’s fall and traumatic brain injury, and he was now back in the hospital after a brief period of recovery at home. Our local bishop, Richard Garcia, had died on July 8 after a brief struggle with Alzheimer’s. Then Br. Gabriel, after a very long fight against cancer and congestive heart failure, entered his excruciating six-day final death throes, during which time his sister, Sr. Jean Marie, OCD, also passed away. As I was preparing for Gabriel’s funeral and going over my homily one last time, I got a call from my Mom in Arizona informing

me that my old friend Mark had taken his own life. On August 10, with Robert still in a coma, I had flown overnight to Arizona to preside and preach for Mark’s funeral—never an easy task in the case of a suicide. I arrived back in Monterey at 10 PM the next day, emotionally and physically so exhausted I could barely speak. One of our staff, Jordan, picked me up at the airport, but before we left the parking lot he said, “Something arrived for you.” He promptly got out of his pickup, fetched something from a box in the bed of the truck, opened the passenger side door, and dropped a beautiful month-old white Alaskan Husky puppy on my lap.“It’s been a rough month,” he said. “I thought you could use a little cheering up.”

What I remember most was my hesitancy in that moment.First, did I really need another responsibility? Second—and this was deeper—I felt an unwillingness to become emotionally attached to anyone or anything else in that moment. I immediately thought of Mary Oliver’s well-known poem, “The Summer Day”: “Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon?” (Mary Oliver herself was, of course, another irreplaceable loss to the world in these past months.)

It didn’t take long before Aldo, as I named him, won me over, sitting on my lap with his head on my chest all the way home. I know a dog is no replacement for human beings, but this wasn’t just a pet. This dog came with a question from the Universe: not just “Are you still willing to love?” but more like, “Are you willing to get up in the morning and keep going?” Maybe more fundamentally, “Do you still have hope?” And a small voice inside me ultimately whispered, “Yes. Yes, I do.”

Not only for our community and me personally,it has been a season of great loss for many in our larger community. Besides the natural disasters that have struck us all, particularly the fires and rains on the California coast, there seem to have been an extraordinary number of deaths in our circle of friends and oblates, some of them sudden and tragic. The mass shooting in Thousand Oaks, for instance, was only a few hours south of us. And of course, besides our normal practical challenges, we at the Hermitage are

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facing the additional hurdle of our entry road crumbling into the sea and the arduous, expensive process of building a new one.

I have begun to think of that road very positively though, as if it were our own path to the future. In the middle of all that loss, New Camaldoli and I both turned 60 years old. I have been told several times that in India, 60 is an auspicious age, a time of regeneration. That gives me hope. But what ultimately gives me hope is the Resurrection. Jesus’ triumph over death is not just about the physical body, his and ours: it is about the entire thrust of the Universe. Within the endless and seemingly inescapable cycles of birth and death, creation and destruction, growth and decay, we believe that there is also a forward trajectory to history, sometimes leaping, sometimes imperceptibly slouching toward new life, springing up gradually when all seems dead—a flower bursting through the concrete, an activist staring down a phalanx of guns, small acts of generosity, a scared puppy curling up on my lap.

I often think of and quote the philosopher and activist Cornell West, who points out that there is a difference between hope and optimism. Optimism, he says, is a secular construct, a calculation of probability—and from a secular perspective “the end doesn’t look so good right now.” “But we are people of hope,” he says. “Hope wrestles with despair, but it doesn’t generate optimism. It just generates this energy to be courageous, to bear witness, to see what the end is going to be.” And the Resurrection tells us that in all circumstances, from physical death through emotional upheavals all the way to dealing with climate change and tyranny, we know what the end is: God will be all in all, as Paul ends his discourse on death in 1st Corinthians 15. That doesn’t let us off the hook into a kind of quietism. It generates the energy to be courageous, to bear witness, to decide to love some more, to get up in the morning and keep living.

The Mary Oliver poem doesn’t end with that sad line quoted on the previous page. It ends with what may be her most famous epigraph: “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”

Primacy

i.m. Robert, OSB Cam.December 2018

I stopped at your grave todayToo new to be marked Quiet reminder that the arcs Of some lives extend longInto the winter horizon Especially when crisp days Give way to clear nights of stars.

Four months now. Your voice Still dances in the Psalms andIntercessions. Your homilies echo Like the call of a thousand loves – Though you would probably say The truest words ring inside each of us. You always seemed somewhat beyond science, But well within the broader kind of reason That I think moves me now to ponder –Do I hear the unplayed tune of a flute? Is that a hand, unraised with blessings Yet to come? We shuffle out after prayers, The chapel light still warm.

If vocation is the life we’re marked forAre we also called to particular deaths – Specific stories raveling from today That write themselves beyond?

In the recreation room is a portrait of you,Standing in the cloister: eyes deep with loyalty, Language, listening – all your gravityPulling us to the heart of this place, ever-ripening, Where the sunrises are never the same

And the sunsets, like your last word, Take their sweet time to reveal themselves.

The ocean sighs, sufficient unto itself – I hear songs of distant whales – The rain plays rhapsodies on rooftops –

And everywhereAs if proving the primacy of loveThe scent of pines The scent of pines

– Aaron Maniam

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Tending to the Soil of Our SoulLia Huber

I remember, growing up in the Midwest, how a bleakness would settle over me as the last burst of color faded from tree limbs, leaving a stark landscape of black branches slashing an ashen sky.

That feeling followed me decades later to California. My husband, Christopher, and I had moved to wine country. In spring, the hills would be carpeted in a green so fertile it tinted the horizon. In summer, broad leaves canopied clusters of violet grapes. In autumn, vineyards blazedpersimmon and crimson.

But in winter, just as in the Midwest, there was … nothing.

Like so many of us growing up in modern society, I’m not great at waiting. And the bare vines and branches felt, I’ll admit, like something of a waste. A waste of time. A mark of inefficiency.

But that just shows how little I knew about how plants grow. About how we grow.

A few years after we moved to Healdsburg I was having tea with my wise friend, Jann, on a blustery February day, looking out over their (bare) vineyards. I’d just shared how empty I felt, in the midst of a painful battle with fibromyalgia, thwarted by numerous nonstarters in my career.

Jann blew on her tea and looked out the window. “What do you see when you look out at those vineyards, Lia?” she asked me.

“I don’t know,” I replied, fidgeting impatiently. “A bunch of dead branches.”

“Aha,” she said. “That’s where you’re wrong. Those vines aren’t dead. They’re actually doing the most productive work they’ve done all year.”

She went on to explain that, while above the surface itappeared that nothing was happening, below the ground the vines’ roots were replenishing themselves, taking in nourishment from the rich compost and mulch—the refuse from previous seasons—so that they could do the taxing work of bearing fruit come summer.

Jann turned to me. “What if you’re in a fallow time in your outward life, Lia,” she said, “because God wants to nour-ish something deeper in you right now, to give you the strength to bear fruit in the future that you don’t even know exists yet?”

I cocked my head as two worlds merged.

In my food writing career, I’d been gaining a deeper under-standing of sustainable farming practices. One big paradigm

shift for me had been the importance of soil.

I’d always thought of soil as just dirt. Something that got your shoes dusty and turned to mud if it rained. But I’d learned that there are over a billion microbes in just one teaspoon of soil, nourished by a diet of decay.

Soil, it turned out, was a deep mystery far beyond ourunderstanding and crucial to life on earth. In his speech “The Future of Food,” the Prince of Wales declared that “soil is the planet’s most vital renewable resource.”

God formed Adam from soil, and that connection wasperpetuated in language—the Latin word for “soil”—humus— and “human” come from the same root.

I had always read Jesus’s words about bearing fruit through the lens of my upbringing, assuming the “fruits” were achievements and wins. I had never given a second thought to the “soil.” To me, failure and loss were nothing more than things to be lamented and grieved.

But looking out at the vineyard that day, I began to wonder if I’d had it all wrong. After all, the health of soil was fueled not by the “useful fruit” that had been carted away tofarmers markets and pressed into wine, but by what was left behind.

What if the character traits Paul lists in Galatians weren’t just guidelines for being a good person, but the actual fruit Jesus was talking about? What if God were using my failures and losses to nurture the soil of my soul?

What if, just as God designed the soil system to be regen-erative—where death and decay were the very genesis of new life—the same was true of our “soul system?”

Leaving Jann’s that day, I decided to try on the notion that the rejections I’d been experiencing might not be outright failures.

Over the years, through wise mentors and the guidance of the Spirit, I acquired tools and developed practices to tend to my spiritual soil—quiet, solitude, space for contemplation, regular meditation and prayer, and journaling. And over the years, fruit began to appear.

Not the juicy fruit I’d been banking on of success and rec-ognition and ease. But the deep, abiding fruits of the Spirit.

I recognized them in the way my soul’s gaze slowly pivoted outward, continuously on the lookout for ways to serve others rather than just myself. And in the way my breath would remain even and my emotions tempered duringan argument, when in the past I would have stormed out the door.

But the biggest harvest came several years later during a particularly grueling time.

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A Christian Response to Gun ViolencePhil McManus, Oblate OSB Cam.

We are all too familiar with the images of senseless gun violence. A concert in Las Vegas. A synagogue in Pittsburgh. Even in our schools, innocent children and dedicated teachers are being murdered: 143 killed and 289 wounded since the Columbine killings in 1999. And the traumaextends much further. More than 4.1 million studentsendured at least one lockdown in the 2017–2018 school year alone. One million of them were elementary-age. At least 61 percent of the lockdowns were related to firearms. A recent Washington Post article reports on the lasting trauma that some children experience as a result of a lock-down, even when no violence actually occurs.1

49 Farolitos, an art installation by James Nocito at Grace Cathedral, was a tribute to the 49 people murdered in the Orlando nightclub shooting on June 12, 2016.

The bishops of the United States have long called for mod-est gun control measures as one essential step in confront-ing the epidemic of gun violence. Their list includes a total ban on assault weapons, universal background checks for all gun purchases, limitations on civilian access to high-capacity weapons and ammunition magazines, and locksor other measures that make guns safer.2

However, the withering polarization of our politics has impeded dialogue and made it very difficult to find common ground.

In his recent book Them, Nebraska Sen. Ben Sasse argues that “the dysfunction in D.C.” stems from something “deeper than economics,” “deeper and more meaningful” than politics. “What’s wrong with America … starts with one uncomfortable word … Loneliness.” And he underscores the need to build community as one essential antidote.

The profound alienation of the perpetrators of mass killings is an obvious, extreme example of the loneliness to which Sasse refers. Violent street gangs are a complex phenom-enon, but in them we can discern the desperate human

I had flown out to Connecticut with our then 4-½ year old daughter, Noemi, to be with my parents over the Fourth of July holiday, seven months after my Mom had suffered a devastating stroke. To make it worse, the tension between Christopher and me was so high he’d stayed at home to make it easier on both of us.

Everything that week fell at the extremes of the emotional scale, often at the same time.

Sitting beside my Mom in her wheelchair on the deck, laughing as we watched Noemi attempt somersaults on the grass … and moments later the tears that came with the gut-wrenching acknowledgement that Mom would never again play with her granddaughter on that lawn.

Having a firecracker fight with Christopher over the phone just as the sun was setting on the Fourth ... and then walk-ing out to the backyard to see my brother delighting in his niece as they painted the black sky with fiery sparklers. I was aware that the g-force of such strongly opposing emotions would have crushed me in the past. Yet what pervaded during those days was a deep sense of joy and peace that did not in any way come from me.

Interestingly enough, healthy soil brings more resilient crops. And I was finding the same outcome to be true with my soul’s soil. God was tilling all my loss and grief with His love to bring about a closer connection with Him, and a richer life—no matter the circumstances—than I could ever have imagined.

Lia Huber is the author of NOURISHED: A Memoir of Food, Faith and Enduring Love (with Recipes) and the founder of NOURISH Evolution (nourishevolution.com). Through much soul tending over the years, Lia felt the stirring of the Spirit towards her calling of helping people live richer, more delicious lives by eating deliberately and living authentically, which she does through her writing, her talks, and her online programs. She lives in Healdsburg with her husband, Christopher, and daughter, Noemi.

In the midst of winter, I found there was,within me, an invincible summer.– Albert Camus

need for community. And we have no doubt experienced in our own lives the deep longing for community, the ways in which we have sought to build it, and the ways in which societal pressures and our own inertia have caused our efforts to fall short of our ideals.

Perhaps we can learn from other societies that have been torn apart by deeper and wider violence and yet have found paths forward. In Colombia, a 50-year civil war has taken hundreds of thousands of lives. A peace deal ap-proved in 2016 charted a way out of the war; building a solid and sustainable peace will still take years. In 2008, evangelical church groups, organized by the Mennonite organization Justapaz, started an innovative peace-building project. Working in some of the most dangerous parts of the country, the churches came together to do the hard work of building peace long before the peace agreement was on the horizon. In the ensuing years, they have brought hope to their com-munities, obtained concrete assistance for victims of the war, and built broad coalitions that have facilitated commu-nity-based problem solving and given local communities a cohesive and power-ful voice to advocate for their needs.

Several elements, integral to their prog-ress, may illuminate our own efforts to confront the epidemic of gun violence in the USA. First of all is the practice of their Christian faith. Their faith is what fuels the responsibility they feel to work for peace. Its values guide that work and, together with support from church communities, sustains them in the midst of the considerable personal risks that they take. In addition, rather than simply addressing the symptoms of the conflict, they are committed to conflict transforma-tion, addressing its deeper roots. That informs both the style and the content of their work. A related factor is their insistence on reparations for the victims, because justice requires it and because you cannot build a sustainable peace in the absence of some form of healing for the victims of the war. Finally, they are committed to the demanding work of listening; of building relationships, mutual under-standing and trust; and of creating accountable political structures that bring together the diverse voices of church-es, business, community organizations, universities, victims and others, in a unified and powerful chorus.

Hope is nurtured when people come together in common cause. Contemplating the horrific violence around us in

isolation can be profoundly discouraging. Coming together with others to try to do something about it is in itself an act of healing and a key step toward finding solutions.

The US bishops hold up “restorative justice”3 as a power-ful model for communal healing. They recognize that in order to prevent future violence, we must find ways to heal the wounds of violent acts. This process must involve the perpetrators, the victims and the community that itself has been wounded and that is uniquely able to provide the support and ensure much-needed accountability.

For many of us, contemplative practice is a means of rooting ourselves in Christ who is found, as Jesus told us, in “the least of these.” But how do we ensure that our practice does not short-circuit itself in self-absorption or in the pursuit of inner reverie but instead produces the fruit

of engaged service and the transforma-tion of our suffering world?

Episcopal priest Tilden Edwards takes up this challenge: “The rise of contem-plative practice today stems ... from the desire to grow more fully into who we really are. We need to cultivate spiritual communities ... where there is mutual sup-port, challenge, and practices to foster the lifetime journey from the image to the likeness of God ... Lis-tening and respond-

ing together from the contemplative heart in all societal settings can further the maturing of human relationships, purpose, and inclusive societal well-being: the ripening of the communal kin-dom of heaven.” (Emphasis added)4

1 www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/2018/local/school-shootings-database/?utm_term=.216c0bad1507; statistics are from www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/2018/local/school-lockdowns- in-america/?utm_term=.47899a8c8fa6

2 www.usccb.org/issues-and-action/human-life-and-dignity/criminal-justice-restorative-justice/backgrounder-on-gun-violence.cfm

3 zehr-institute.org/what-is-rj

4 Tilden Edwards, “Aging from the Contemplative Heart,” “Ripening,”Oneing, vol. 1, no. 2 (Center for Action and Contemplation: 2013), 50–52. This excerpt appeared (12/28/18) in Franciscan Friar Richard Rohr’s Daily Meditations, a wonderful source of food and guidance for the journey; cac.org/category/daily-meditations

Phil McManus, an oblate, lives in Santa Cruz. For many years, he has worked with advocacy nonprofits focused on justice and peacebuilding in Latin America.

The sculpture Non-Violence is also known as “the knotted gun”. It was originally created as a memorial tribute to the legendary singer and songwriter John Lennon, after he was shot and killed outside his home in New York City on December 8, 1980.

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explore monastic life. It was an article in Time magazine which clinched it for him. The short article had a single sentence about the Hermitage and one photograph, but that was all he needed. “By the time I finished that article, the Lord gave me a miracle of grace,” he had said to me about his inspiration to pursue the monastic life. Hearrived at the Hermitage soon after, in 1962, and perse-vered for more than 50 years in his monastic vocation. When Gabriel got hold of a thing, he’d never let go—his devout genuineness made him a special person.

Over the years, Gabriel worked in many capacities at the Hermitage. He was secretary to the community chapter, worked in the kitchen, and served as guest-master. For20 years he did nearly all the shopping for the entirecommunity—a weekly journey to Monterey, which heenjoyed very much.

He also worked as Sacristan, a job he particularly loved. One retreatant said, “The way he did the Sacristan work spoke to me profoundly of the love of God.” She was inspired by his work and wanted to set her table the way he set up the altar. Another guest reported him giving her a magnificent blessing. She shared his words, “May the grace you will receive in this retreat be greater than all you have received in your life so far. May God sweep you up to heaven and so inflame you with his love that when he sets you down again you will want nothing but him forever.”A memory I want to retain of Br. Gabriel was the time he came back from a charismatic convention. With arms out-stretched and full of jubilation he was singing one of the hymns “YOU are all I want!” Fr. Isaiah was born and raised in Sacramento. He has resided at the Hermitage since 1980. He considers himself “one of the old timers.”

Br. Gabriel Kirby OSB, Cam. passed away on the 18th of July, 2018. When I think of Br. Gabriel, I am reminded of a funny cartoon in which there are two men looking at an escalator and a third man is walking up the “down” escala-tor—clearly going against the flow. One of the two men commented, “That’s Bob, he was raised in the wilderness by salmon.”

That man going against the flow could be Br. Gabriel, who had something of a reputation for being a contrarian. If you said no, he would say yes and if you said yes, he’d say no. If I said, “It’s raining cats and dogs,” he’d say, “I don’t see any cats or dogs.” It was his witty simplicity and sincere truth that endeared him to so many. Br. Gabriel was also the most generous of monks. When he used to do the weekly trip into town, for example, he would go out of his way to help stranded motorists. He would ensure they received assistance, sometimes bringing them back to the Hermitage for a night’s lodging.  Br. Gabriel was born on Easter Sunday in 1930 to a devout Catholic family. As a young man, he never thought of be-coming a monk—his passion was for music. As a child he sang in a boys’ choir and appeared in the movie Going My Way. He wanted to make music his life’s work. Things didn’t go as planned, but music remained essential to him. He told me, “One thing which has been of great importance in my spiritual life all along has been charismatic praise and worship and Handel’s Messiah.” He further explained, “No matter what I was going through from the first note I am all on fire through to the end and beyond.”

He graduated from the University of California, Los Angeles with a degree in geography, but ultimately felt led to

BR. GABRIELApril 20, 1930 – July 18, 2018

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Fr. Robert Hale OSB, Cam. was born on April 21, 1937, in Denver, Colorado. His parents were active members of the Episcopal Church and it was the Anglican liturgical tradition that first introduced him to regular praying of the psalms and the structures of morning and evening prayers. After his father’s death when he was 14, Robert and his mother moved to Glendale, California, where he graduated high school and entered Pomona College to study philosophy. During his time as an undergraduate, he converted to Catholicism and entered New Camaldoli Hermitage in April 1959 at the end of his senior year in college. As he told the story in his book, Love on the Mountain, he actually came to the Hermitage during spring break with the initial intent of not taking his final exams or finishing his degree. (His pro-fessors eventually convinced him to do both!) After solemn vows, he studied in Italy and was ordained at Camaldoli in 1966 before coming back to the United States to complete graduate studies at St. John’s University (MA in theology) and Fordham University (PhD in theology).

Fr. Robert taught philosophy and monastic spirituality at Sant’Anselmo, the international Benedictine university in Rome, from 1972 to 1979. In the autumn of 1979, he was sent to Berkeley by his Camaldolese superiors to provide leadership in the founding of Incarnation Monastery as an ‘Ecumenical Joint Monastic Community’ with the brothers of the Episcopal Order of the Holy Cross.

While living at Incarnation, Fr. Robert initiated the Camal-dolese oblate program. Starting in the autumn of 1980, Fr. Robert taught spirituality at the Jesuit School of Theology in Berkeley until he was elected Prior of New Camaldoli in 1988. He served as Prior through January 2000; during this time the oblate program at New Camaldoli was established.

After stepping down as Prior, he returned to Berkeley to teach for several years before returning permanently to New Camaldoli in 2006. Although he briefly served a sec-ond term as Prior from January 2012 through June 2013, his major role during his final years at New Camaldoli was serving as Oblate Chaplain.

Fr. Robert frequently talked about the impact that Thomas Merton’s writings had on him, particularly in regard to making him aware of the Camaldolese. He was a plenary speaker at the first General Meeting of the International Thomas Merton Society (ITMS) in 1989. He also served as an advisor for the Bede Griffiths Trust since its inception in 1994 and was elected as its first chairperson.

He was the author of numerous articles and three books: Christ and the Universe: Teilhard de Chardin and the Cosmos (a revision of his doctoral dissertation); Canterbury and Rome, Sister Churches: A Roman Catholic Monk Reflects upon Reunion in Diversity; and Love on the Mountain: The Chronicle Journal of a Camaldolese Monk.

He died on the 29th of August, 2018. Fr. Robert will be remembered by many for his gentle and loving presence as well as his thoughtful mentoring, both in person and through virtual environments such as Facebook and online discussion groups. His consistent emphasis on the importance of the “primacy of love” and the importance of koinonia (Christian fellowship or communion) are hall-marks of his legacy.

Matt Fisher is a chemistry professor at Saint Vincent College in Latrobe, Pennsylvania, and has been a Camaldolese oblate since 1998. For over 30 years he has studied and taught the Japanese art of Aikido, in which he holds the rank of fifth-degree black belt.

FR. ROBERTApril 21, 1937 – August 29, 2018

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OBLATE COMMUNITY & PEER MENTORING

The Beauty of VulnerabilityLisa Washio-Collette, Oblate OSB Cam.

My husband Julian and I enjoy the gift of living and working at the Hermitage as housekeepers for the monastery retreat facilities. One of the most fun things about the job is driving a golf cart around, from the kitchen to the retreat house to the bookstore and back again! Lately I have noticed, in the upper right-hand corner of the golf cart, a beautiful piece of art—an intricate, circular woven webcreated by a spider. I am quite amazed at the web’s strength and the resiliency of this spider. The web has stayed intact through winds and rainstorms. There have been days when I saw that the spider had lost half her web, and one day I noticed that it was completely gone. But to my surprise and delight, after a couple of days there it was again, delicate silver threads making a perfect circle shining in its full glory! After major loss, the spider had faithfully re-created beauty.

For me, part of this past year has been a season of major grief and loss. At the end of May, my elderly mother wasdiagnosed with congestive heart failure. I was able to live with and take care of her while she received in-home hopice care for nearly two months. In her last moments, I held her hand as she passed away peacefully.

I inherited my parents’ house, so the next month was devoted to clearing it out. I experienced the letting go of my childhood home as part of the grieving process, which symbolized for me the letting go of stability and security. During this time, Fr. Robert Hale, one of the elder monksof the Hermitage, also passed away, a mere ten days after my mom. I felt that I was grieving with the community as they were grieving with me.

My connection with the Hermitage and the support of friends, family, and my dear husband gave me the strength to go through this difficult time. I am learning to accept that death is a part of life, and life includes losses in many

Like billowing clouds, like the incessant gurgle of the brook the longing of the spirit can never be stilled.

– Hildegard of Bingen

forms. During these times, difficult emotions like sadness and disappointment cause us to feel vulnerable in our pain. This vulnerability and pain are what we want to avoid, but this is the risk we take in loving others. In The Four Loves, C.S. Lewis writes: “To love at all is to be vulnerable.” Our perfect image of vulnerable love is Jesus on the cross. Di-vine love empowers us to risk loving and to keep on loving amidst the realities of uncertainty and our lack of control.

In my housekeeping work, I dust away spiderwebs, but not the one on our golf cart. For me, this web has become a symbol of resiliency and beauty among the inevitable losses of life. May we invite God into our losses and our grief, trusting that the Spirit is re-creating beauty through the fragile threads of our lives and our loves.

Lisa Washio-Collette and her husband Julian are both oblates and work at New Camaldoli Hermitage. Prior to living at New Camaldoli, they lived and worked in a Catholic Worker community in San Jose, California. She isa graduate of the Mennonite Brethren Biblical Seminary (now Fresno Pacific Biblical Seminary).

“The weeds are pulled up by the muscular efforts of the peasant, but only sun and water can make the corn grow.” – Simone Weil

The only thing we can do that has any effect is strip away the things that get in the way, but only God is the source of the sacred grace, which He gives freely and generously.

This time of waiting allows God’s grace to sink deep into our souls, opening our hearts to have compassion—to come to the aid of each other in need—with love and empathy.

Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. (Galations 6:2)

As Jesus suffered, died, and rose again, through our own patient suffering, we will be given the grace to rise and be a vessel where God’s grace can live, flow, and bless others.

And God is able to make all grace abound to you, sothat always having all sufficiency in everything, youmay have an abundance for every good deed.(2 Corinthians 9:8)

Debi Lorenc is a designer, a photographer, and an artist. She is the design director of this newsletter and a retired creative director and partner of a graphic design firm. Debi lives in San Jose and Big Sur with her husband, Chris. They have four children and two grandchildren. She is an oblate of San Vincenzo Abbey in Italy and a longtime friend of the Benedictine sisters there.

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Abounding GraceDebi Lorenc

I said to my soul, be still, and let the dark come upon youWhich shall be the darkness of God.– T.S. Eliot, “East Coker III:12–13”

Where do we go when in despair? When you lose a loved one, get a frightful diagnosis, lose your home in a fire, find out you have been betrayed, or learn your child is in crisis? When you feel numb and you can’t take one step forward?

I said to my soul, be still, and wait without hopeFor hope would be hope for the wrong thing; wait without love,For love would be love of the wrong thing; there is yet faithBut the faith and the love and the hope are all in the waiting.– T.S. Eliot, “East Coker III:23–26”

As Christians, we too often believe that we should have some supernatural strength to get us through hard times—just by believing God will be right there for us. Even though this is true, we may not get the results we think are obvious or that we want. Often our pride does not want us to sit with the fear and uncertainty. The truth is that we need to em-brace our struggles and

unknowing and wait for God, as T.S. Eliot writes above in “East Coker”: “… wait without hope / for hope would be hope for the wrong thing.”

“I do not at all understand the mystery of grace—only that it meets us where we are, but does not leave us where it found us.” – Anne Lamott

Think of David’s despair in the cave as he waited for God to release him from his torment, “How long, Oh Lord? Will you forget me forever?” (Psalm 13:1). Isn’t that what it’s like when you feel abandoned? And often we get more blows in the process. But then there are the “thin places”—the veil between the earthly world and the eternal world—between our emotions and the sacred light that peers in with glimpses of promise.

My father’s hand and mine shortly before he passed on September 8, 2018.

OBLATE COMMUNITY & PEER MENTORING

There is a light that can overcome the darkness. There is no darkness that can overcome the light.

– Fr. Cyprian Consiglio,

Wade, also known as “Uncle Wade,” arrived in 2000, after a child-hood friend gifted him with a retreat stay. He reflected, “I did not find the Hermitage, the Hermitage found me in 2000 and being offered a job here was an undeserved bless-ing.” Wade can often be spotted cruising the Hermitage property in a donated golf cart filled with tools and groundskeeping sup-plies, and he can fix just about anything.

Merritt, a Big Sur native, came the Hermitage after doing some contract work in 2008. He assisted in building theinfirmary. In 2012, he came on board as a full-time employ-ee joining this dynamic team.

Rod was newly married and passing through on his honey-moon in 1998 when he first stumbled upon the Hermitage. He returned in 2008 as an outside contractor to do some remodeling work on one of the monk’s cells. Since then he has been a full-time employee and he and his wife Jane live at the Hermitage in a private residence.

Tim started in early 2018 after doing some volunteer work for special events at the Hermitage. He moved to Big Sur from Los Angeles in 2014 and had been looking for full- time employment in the area. Tim and I married last year and we live at the Hermitage.

Joe recently joined the maintenance crew. He is a long-time family friend of our Chef Chris and hails from New Jersey.

What is the most interesting thing that has happened while working at the Hermitage?

When I presented this question, I was expecting to hear stories of disasters, fires, or evacuations. Instead, I found that the team approached these issues as part of their jobs and they handle crisis events with grace and stability. What might be of concern to many of us is handled smoothly by this group.

Rod replied that, “the most interesting thing is the joy of not being in the world and how easy it is to live without it.” Michael responded, “obtaining a unique monastic perspec-tive on life.” Wade noted, “a couple of unexpected visitors including a man on horseback traveling across the coun-try to “spread the word” and a lovesick peacock hoarsely calling for a date after dark.” Merritt reflected on the very unique challenge of the placement, by a crane, of the new

12 ~ New Camaldoli Hermitage

Helpful Blessings—the Maintenance CrewJill Gisselere, Director of Development

Each day during the week you can find a small group of men and a German Shepherd named Sophia gathered ina circle behind the cloister. These men comprise themaintenance department led by Michael Richards. Every morning, they gather to plan what needs to be done and to address any urgent issues at the Hermitage as well as the long-term maintenance requirements so that we can keep our doors open to the public.

These daily tasks may change de-pending on the weather or many oth-er variables. The areas of responsibility for this team include: man-agement of the buildings, upkeep of the grounds, working with heavy equipment and genera-tors, repair work for the automobiles, monitoring the refrig-

eration, maitaining the roads, being mindful of the spring and water works, supervision of hazardous materials, and managing fire clearance and concerns.

I sat down with the maintenance team —which currently consists of Michael Richards, Rod, Wade, Merritt, Tim and Joe—and asked them a few questions so that our readers could get to know them and learn about what they do at the Hermitage.

How did you find out about the Hermitage?

Michael found the Hermitage through a friend over 30 years ago and began working for room and board, assisting Br. Emmanuel and Fr. Joseph Deamer with various projects. When it was decided that Michael would stay on as an employee, he originally asked for one dollar per day as his starting salary but the monks offered him two dollars and he agreed. Michael has been with the Hermitage since 1985, and he oversees the maintenance department.

guest hermitages on the hillside of the property. The pro-cess, which occurred in 2014, took over three months to complete. The new guest hermitages have helped sustain the livelihood of the Hermitage, providing retreatants with new, modern, affordable places to stay. Tim’s most inter-esting moment was getting caught in a runaway dump truck a few months ago, which came very close to a ledge on the property. It was a close call for Tim, Michael, and Sophia and because of their quick response, they were able to stop the truck from going off the hillside.

When asked to describe a typical day at work, all are in agreement that there is no way to define a typical day. For those who commute to the Hermitage, this often means an early morning, carrying a chainsaw to move and cut debris in the road and navigating ongoing road closures. The main-tenance department prioritizes their daily tasks based on the needs of the monks, the retreatants, and the staff. Main-taining over 900 acres, 50 buildings, 30 residents, and 20 retreatants can be daunting and any given day many issues can arise. The team is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week as needed for those who are living at the Hermitage.

What is your biggest concern for the future of the Hermitage?

Wade, Merritt, and Tim all agreed that both the driveway and the maintenance of Highway One are the top priorities. The urgency to keep both open in order to be able to get resources to the Hermitage as well as other residents and local businesses is essential. Michael and Rod both agreed that it is important to continue populating the Hermitage with new monks to sustain the important work that occurs at the Hermitage.

The donations we receive throughout the year help sup-port the hard work of this team. The Hermitage could not survive without this team of dedicated men. They are so committed to the work the monks are doing and to the fu-ture of the Hermitage. You may occasionally see them qui-etly working on the property or in the chapel. If you have a chance, please take a moment to say hello and thank them for the fine work they are doing.

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Preached Retreats for 2019April 26–28Joseph Neary, PhD.

Neuroscience and MeditationStudies from the new field of contemplative neuroscience demonstrate that Christian and other ancient practices of meditation can change the activity, structure, and function of our brains. During our time together, we will explore how we can utilize basic principles of neuroscience—such as neuroplasticity and stress resilience—to enrich our con-templative practices and enhance our health and well-being.

Dr. Neary is an internationally known neuroscientist and long-time meditator, and he has held positions at Massachusetts General Hospital, Harvard Medical School, National Institutes of Health, Marine Biological Laboratory, University of Miami School of Medicine, and VA Medical Center. He has published 100 research and review papers on the mechanisms of learning, memory, neuroendocrinol-ogy and traumatic brain injury.

May 17–19Maggie Weaver

11th StepSacred reading, holy reading, close reading—how do we bring together our understanding of the human capacity to read and understand with the mysterious spiritual core of ourselves? The monastic practice of Lectio Divina, truly a charism of the church, continues to expand and utilize cultural changes and human knowledge to bring us closer to ourselves and to God.

June 21–23Fr. Cyprian Consiglio, OSB Cam. and Jacob Riyeff, OblSB

Wake Up! The Legacy of Swami Abhishiktananda in Poetry, Song and FilmSwami Abhishiktananda (Fr. Henri Le Saux) was a Benedictine monk who spent much of his life in India immersed in the contemplative traditions of Christianity and Hinduism. By the time of his death in 1973, Swamiji had become a prophet of interreligious dialogue, an accomplished spiritual writer, and one of the 20th century’s great mystics. Swamiji sought and desired to lead others to the realization of Absolute Reality, drawing together Christian teaching on the Trinity and Hindu teaching on nonduality (Advaita).

Though he, like so many of the great mystics, called seek-ers to go “beyond” (beyond concepts, beyond words, beyond images), he also understood the necessity of words and signs in our everyday reality. In that spirit, New Camaldoli Hermitage is excited to offer a retreat focused on Swamiji’s life and teaching. While we will make spacefor the silence Swamiji loved so well, we will also celebrate his life and teaching in various arts: New Camaldoli’s own

Activities and VisitorsAUGUSTFr. Thomas spent a month at our hermitage in Brazil.

SEPTEMBERWe celebrated the funeral of Fr. Robert on the Feast of the Birth of Mary; Br. Timothy spent time with his Holy Cross community in Santa Barbara; Fr. Cyprian visited Oregon Catholic Press in Portland; Thomas began a round-the-world pilgrimage to Australia, India, and Italy (with stops in Hawaii and Singapore).

OCTOBERWe had a marvelous retreat week led by Sr. Marielle Frigge, OSB, from Yankton, SD; Br. Benedict had a family visit to Philadelphia.

NOVEMBERCyprian had a family visit to Phoenix; Postulant Doug had a family visit to North Carolina; Br. Timothy visited Holy Cross motherhouse in New York; our Financial Advisory Board met at the Monastery of the Risen Christ.

DECEMBEROblates Jackie Chew and Aaron Maniam offered us an afternoon of music and poetry; our friends at Lucia Lodge hosted us again for a Christmas dinner; we had a beautiful, quiet Christmas celebration and an all-Camaldolese Gathering two days later at which we voted to approve Br. Bede’s request for ordination.

JANUARYThe prior’s Advisory Board held its annual meeting; Fr. Scott Sinclair offered us a week of conferences on Scripture.

FEBRUARYSeveral of the monks participated in the welcome and installation of the new bishop of the Diocese of Monterey, Daniel Garcia; amidst the worst winter storms of the sea-son, Bishop Jerry Wilkerson came to New Camaldoli and ordained Br. Bede to the diaconate and Br. Ignatius tothe priesthood. We of course also celebrated Fr. Ignatius’ first Mass.

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Fr. Cyprian will lead us in chant and song, Benedictine oblate and poet Jacob Riyeff will give a reading of Swamiji’s newly translated poetry, and we will view the new docu-mentary of Swamiji’s life, Dawn of the Abyss: The Spiritual Birth of Swamiji.

In addition to these multimedia sessions, traditional con-ferences on Swamiji’s teaching will offer a more detailed encounter with his profound insights into the contemplative life. Please join us for this joyous event!

All reservations are made through Katee at (831)-667-2456 ext. 143 or reservations@contemplation.com.

Online it will appear that there is no availability for the Preached Retreats. That is because these rooms are being held for individuals who wish to join the retreat. If you want to do it by email, that is fine; or you can give Katee a call. This is the information Katee needs: a mailing address, a phone number, an email address, the number of people coming, and a Visa or MasterCard number (with expiration date) to which to charge the first night’s deposit; which is the cost of the room for one night and the additional $60.00 per person for the Preached Retreat itself.

The triannual newsletter is published by theCamaldolese Hermits of America for our friends,oblates, and sponsors.

Director: Father Cyprian Consiglio, OSB Cam. Editor: Lisa Benner, Oblate, OSB Cam.Design: Debi LorencDevelopment: Jill Gisselere

Photo credits:Debi Lorenc: Front cover, pages 2, 4 right column, 6 left column, 11, 14, and back cover Devin Kumar: Page 4 left columnKayleigh Meyers: Pages 8 and 9 Jill Gisselere: Pages 12 and 13Rich Veum: Page 3, 15 left column (top), middle left twoValerie Sinkus: Page 15 left column (bottom), right two

Back Cover: ‘’The Avowal’’ By Denise Levertov, from OBLIQUE PRAYERS, copyright ©1984 by DeniseLevertov. Reprinted by permission of New Directions Publishing Corp.

If you have questions or comments, please emailnewsletter@contemplation.com. New Camaldoli Hermitage62475 Highway 1Big Sur, CA 93920

Visit us at www.contemplation.com and“New Camaldoli Hermitage” on Facebook.

Advisory Board meeting

What the Monks Are ReadingFr. Cyprian: Divine Discontent: The Prophetic Voice of Thomas Merton by John Moses; Earthly Joys by Phillipa Gregory

Br. Doug Herbek: The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri; Self-Abandonment to Divine Providence by Fr. Jean-Pierre de Caussade, S.J.

Fr. Isaiah: Reimagining the Ignatian Examen by Mark Thibodeaux; The Sunne In Splendour by Sharon Kay Penman

Fr. Thomas: The Silmarillion by J.R.R.Tolkien; Human Personality and Its Survival of Bodily Death by F.W. H. Myers

Br. Timothy: Evolutionaries by Carter Phipps; Sacred Fire by Ronald Rolheiser Staff SubmissionsRich Veum: How to Change your Mind by Michael Pollan; The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida

Vicky Conte: All Creatures Great and Small by James Herriot; The One Year Bible (New International Edition)

Julian Washio-Collette: White Fragility: Why It’s So Hard for White People to Talk about Racism by Robin D’Angelo; Empire Baptized: How the Church Embraced What Jesus Rejected by Wes Howard-Brook

Lisa Washio-Collette: Christian Meditation: Experiencing the Presence of God by James Finley

Jill Gisselere: In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts by Gabor Maté; The Good Girl by Mary Kubica

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Br. Bede’s ordination

Fr. Ignatius’ ordination

“I said: what about my eyes?He said: Keep them on the road.

I said: What about my passion?He said: Keep it burning.

I said: What about my heart?He said: Tell me what you hold inside it?

I said: Pain and sorrow.He said: Stay with it. The wound is the placewhere the Light enters you.”

– Rumi

Br. Bede’s ordination

Fr. Ignatius’ ordination

The Avowal

As swimmers dareto lie face to the skyand water bears them,as hawks rest upon airand air sustains them,so would I learn to attainfreefall, and floatinto Creator Spirit’s deep embrace,knowing no effort earnsthat all-surrounding grace.

– Denise Levertov