8/14/2019 Living Your Talent: Eliminating the Roadblocks that Get in the Way

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LivingYourTalent:EliminatingtheRoadblocksthatGetintheWay

ClaimingyourTalentAdvantageandusingittoLiveYourTalentsaremorethantheoreticalconceptsforme.IbelievethatYourTalentAdvantageisnotonlyyourbirthright,buttheroadtoamorefulfillingandmeaningfullife.Wealltraveltheroadoflifefromoneendtotheother,sowhynotchoosetodothingsyouarenaturallygiftedatdoingwhileonthejourneysothatyoucanenjoyfully

exploringthegiftsandtalentsyouwerebornwith?

IpresentthismessageasaconstantthemeinthetalksIgive,theblogsIwrite,andtheservicesIdeliver.Withfewexceptionsthemessageisreceivedpositively.WhenIspeak,Iseesmiles,nodsofagreement,andgetenthusiasticfeedback.Inevitably,aftertheexcitementofthemessagetransformsintotherealityofpeople’slivesIgetthequestion,“Well,Ireallyliketheidea,buthowdoIdoit?”Ihaveoftenponderedwhysomethingthatissoeasytodescribeconceptuallyisapparentlynotsoeasytotransformintoreality.

Roadblock#1:

WhatIhavediscoveredisthattheprocessoflearninghowtouseYourTalentAdvantagetoLiveYourTalentshasseveralhiddenroadblocks.ThefirstisthatevenafterpeoplehavediscoveredtheirTalentAdvantagetheyhaveneverexperiencedwhatitisliketoperformitintherealworld.

WhenIwasingraduateschoolIlearnedaboutnegativetransferenceinwhichaclientprojectsalltheiranger,disappointment,hardfeelings,etc.ontothetherapistratherthanonthepersontowhomtheytrulybelong.IthoughtIunderstoodituntilaclientwentintoarageanddeliveredascathingattackonmytherapeuticskills.IwashurtandoffendeduntilmysupervisorpointedouttomethatIhadjustexperienced“negativetransference.”It’sonethingtoreadaboutit,anotheraltogethertoexperienceit.

Roadblock#2

Thesecondroadblockcomesfromtheprocessofsocialization.Itismyexperience,thatatleastintheU.S.,mostofthefeedbackwegetaboutourselvesisnotaboutwhatwedowellbutaboutourshortcomings.Whetheritisinschoolorintheworkplace,onaprogressreportorperformanceevaluation,mostofwhatwearegivenisadirectoryofthingsthatneedimprovementratherthananinventoryofwhatwehaveexcelledat.Remediationusuallyconsistsofdoingmoreofwhatwedon’tdowellandlessofthetalentsthatcomenaturally.Theoutcomeisthatwe“workhard”toacquireskillsandtalentsthatwearusout,leavelittleornotimeforourinnateskillsandtalents,andspendmuchofourtimewonderingwhyweareexhaustedandunfulfilled.

Roadblock#3:

Thethirdroadblockcomesfromtheintensebutoften,unconsciousfamiliaritywehavewithourskillsandtalents.Thereasoningthatisoftenappliedis,“ifthisissoeasyformetodothenitmustbenothingspecial.Ifitwereitwouldn’tbesoeasy.”Thecrueltyjokeinthischainoflogicisthatourskillsandtalentsareeasytodobecausetheyareourskillsandtalents.Thepunchlineisthatweenduppursuingthingsthatwedon’tdowellnaturallybecauseweattachmorevaluetothingswehavetoworkhardattomaster.

HelpingpeopletodiscovertheirTalentAdvantageisthefirststep,butmostclientswillneedcoachinghelptobreakthroughtheroadblockstofullylivethei

rtalents.

GaryJordan,Ph.D.,hasover27yearsofexperienceinclinicalpsychology,beha

8/14/2019 Living Your Talent: Eliminating the Roadblocks that Get in the Way

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vioralassessment,individualdevelopment,andcoaching.HeearnedhisdoctorateinClinicalPsychologyfromtheCaliforniaSchoolofProfessionalPsychology–Berkeley.He’stheco-founderofVegaBehavioralConsulting,Ltd.,aconsultingfirmthatspecializesinhelpingpeoplediscovertheirtrueskillsandtalents.www.ACIforCoaches.com.