Incognito Music, Models, and More (Issue 14, August 2014)

INCOGNITOmusic, models, and more

Vol. 14, August 2013Rock N’ Roll Texas BBQ

Models, Music, Artists, Writers:

[email protected]

OR

PO Box 2070Mission Viejo, CA 92690

SUBMISSIONS

VISIT US!www.incognitomusicmagazine.com

Follow us on Twitter!

Like us on Facebook!

i Incognito Music, Models, and More (August 2013) incognitomusicmagazine.com

© 2013 Groovy Rutabaga Publications.All Rights Reserved. Reproduction in

whole or in part is prohibited.

music, models, and more

CHIEF WRITERGary Schwind

LAYOUTRachel “Rae” Park

COPY EDITORBob Brower

STAFF WRITERSCarin Merritt

Rachel “Rae” Park

PHOTOGRAPHERGeorge Swar

CONTRIBUTORSJason Bowman

Michael EspinachJens Forster

Sima GanabaAdam Griffith

Ian MillerWilly Pond

David Valiante

FEATURED ON OUR COVERS

(front cover)Mothership photoPhoto courtesy of the Mothership band. Alterations by Rae Park.

(back cover)Samantha Hart photoPhoto courtesy of George Swar.

incognitomusicmagazine.com Incognito Music, Models, and More (August 2013) ii

1 Letter from the Editor

10 Beer Reviews

20 The Merritts of Mixology

22 Have You Heard?

24 Album Reviews

26 The Guest List

5 30-minute mindbenders

28 The Flashback

IN EVERY ISSUE29 Cinephile

Monthly movie reviews

31 Don’t Be That Guy

32 Ask Uncle Sal

33 In Our Next Issue

FEATURESSolid Goat

Our second music featurethis month!

18

CONTENTSIncognito / August 2013

2 Mothership Incognito’s feature artist6 Samantha Hart This month’s feature model17 Solid Goat Second music feature

EDITOR’S LETTERWhen you last joined us, loyal reader, it was for the April issue. We’re in the process of changing the website, but the magazine is still the great product you’ve come to know and love. Now the dog days of summer are upon us here in the States. It’s the time of year for hanging out at the beach or the pool...or filling your bathtub with ice and sitting in it. Anything to try to cool off. Now, our two featured bands (both from Texas) may not do anything to help you cool off, but both Mothership (Dallas) and Solid Goat (Austin) certainly play music that you want to blast out your open windows for all of your neighbors to hear. And if they don’t like it, turn it up louder.

Our model is the lovely Samantha Hart, who is the reigning Miss Arizona for Miss USA International. If her photos don’t help you get through the hottest part of the year, I’m not sure what will.

Something about The Guest List may seem familiar to you. In a previous issue of the magazine, Stuart Miller (drummer for southern California band I’mU) provided The Guest List about underrated hip-hop albums. In this edition his bandmate, guitarist Michael Espinach, gives you five albums less than 30 minutes in duration that you should get to know.

Our beer panel did something a little different this month. Instead of rating five beers of a certain style, our hosts at The Surfin’ Cowboy in Capistrano Beach, California, set us up with five different beers and amazing food paired with each beer.

Our CinePhile Rae has some movies you should see (or possibly skip). As always, her tireless efforts on the layouts are what make this magazine look so good. Check out her blog (cuttingedgecreativity.wordpress.com) and let her know what you think of her amazing work. Or you can always leave your praise for her at Incognito HQ.

Until next time, try and stay cool. Enjoy our rock and roll issue. I’ll catch you later on down the trail.

Thanks for reading.

Gary Schwind

incognitomusicmagazine.com Incognito Music, Models, and More (August 2013) 1

on stage, and playing with his brother.

How did you come up with the name Mothership?

My brother and I had a crazy idea when we were kicking around band names. We thought of a spaceship that comes back from a different part of the galaxy that brings back rock and roll and a movement that’s almost been lost for a period of time. People claim that aliens are light-years smarter than the average human civilization. We were pretty much like, “Man, what if it was this crazy heavy-metal rock and roll ship coming back and invading cities?” You know - one by one - kind of waking people up, trying to see real rock and roll. It’s a modern rep-resentation, a way of being able to have some-body visualize that happening. It’s got a lot of

different meanings, but we kind of use it to sym-bolize that people can actually come and join us and get on board. That goes over well, “We’re gonna invade your town tonight!”

What reputation do you hope to have five years from now?

I think that we definitely are in the business of playing music so we can travel the world. We want to write great records. In five years I hope to have multiple albums out, worldwide respect, a worldwide audience. And I hope we have played at festivals. Hopefully we can keep the same momentum we have now through the next five years; basically become our own, fill a void in the rock and roll and heavy-met-al hierarchy. We’re not trying to sound like anybody else, but we have a lot of influences and a lot of bands we look up to. Hopefully one day we can fill our own spot in that whole wall of rock.

2 Incognito Music, Models, and More (August 2013) incognitomusicmagazine.com

othership is a three-piece heavy rock band from Dallas. By phone, Kyle Juett (bass, lead vocals) discussed the origins of the band’s name, strange happenings

M

“We’re Gonna Invade Your Town Tonight”An interview with Kyle Juett of Mothership

by Carin Merritt


Do you find more enjoyment in the live performances or creating the music?

Actually, performing live has got to be the best. You can just feel the energy. We’ve been playing this record for probably a little over a year now for people, especially locally in Dallas. We’re starting to have people sing along with the songs. They know the lyrics! When someone follows something original that you created, it is pretty powerful. So I think that’s why I like performances, the reason I really enjoy it. Writing music is fun: putting out a riff, getting together with the guys and hammering out ideas.

That’s therapeutic almost…

Yeah, definitely. Now we’re in the process of writing new stuff and putting some new ideas out there.

I believe in the concept of energy. So when you’re putting out new material - your own energy, your own insight - and people actually accept it and give it back to you, I know it must be a good feeling.

It’s really cool to meet a lot of people, like what you’re talking about, how you believe in that stuff. I really do and I think that you can definitely create a bond with somebody through the power of energy. Especially when everybody is on the same page, it creates a really killer environment as far as what we put out and it comes back to us ten times the amount we gave them. It’s like an unspoken battle of energy.

Does that battle ever include you eye-f**king girls in the audience?

(Laughs) I’m kind of weird when I perform. I close my eyes. It’s funny because I look at pictures of me performing live and I’ve got my eyes closed! It’s kind of cool because it’s almost like I’m getting beamed up or something, the way the light hits me. Whenever I do look, I take a mental picture of what the crowd looks like. And when I do look out, it’s amazing. But I don’t always have my eyes closed, it’s mostly when I’m screaming, when I’m not singing and when I’m doing my first riff on my solo. We’re doing a five-minute jam, I’m over there just headbangin’ and getting crazy.

I know you grew up with your dad influencing you and now you’re touring with your brother. What do you think is the hardest part about having family members together in a band?

I don’t think there’s anything hard about it. It’s actually a little bit easier. You’ve got somebody that you grew up with and you know their personality. I mean, I’ve lived with him [Kells] for most of my life. When we’re going on tour, we can just hash out ideas and go toe-to-toe and figure shit out. In that situation, having a family member in a band, everything pretty much gets put out there, there’s no pent-up aggression. Something is said if something needs to be said and you’re not worrying about offending somebody because it’s your brother. I think that if there is ever him and I going back and forth and talking, we get it figured out, we move on and that’s that.

Speaking of personalities in the band, what is everyone like?

I’m definitely the one always talking, the one to BS around. My personality: I like to get people pumped up, fired up. I do all of our booking and stuff. I’m the one to run my mouth most of the time. That’s just who I am, that’s the way I’ve always been.

I’d say my brother’s personality is a little bit quieter. He’s definitely the mastermind behind a majority of the music. He’ll just kind of be standing over there in the corner, ripping this cool riff, and hanging out. When he gets on stage, he transforms for sure.

Judge is also quiet. The guys take a step back and kind of just take everything in. They’re great guys. If you approach them and talk to them they’ll talk to you about everything you want to talk about.

What’s the weirdest thing that ever happened on stage?

Well, there is this kind of weird thing; we were just talking about this yesterday. Sometimes we’ll play “A Whole Lotta Rosie” in our set. There’s a venue in Fort Worth called Lola’s. We’ve played that place six or seven times. Every time we try to play that song, something happens with

Phot

o co

urte

sy o

f St.

Alv

ia.

my bass amp. It either goes out or we have problems. It doesn’t work. We played Lola’s this past Saturday and had that song in the set list, and we were wondering if this shit was going to happen: “The Curse of Lola’s.” It’s always the last song, right when everybody is ready to party. So we played it. Nothing happened. It was great; a buddy came on stage and helped sing it. Then we get to practice the next day, set everything up, and my bass stops working! So we’re thinking there’s some sort of crazy Bon Scott ghost messing with us. His spirit’s probably having a drink, standing on stage, pulling the plug.

Regarding your recent tour to California...

We have followers on Facebook and Instagram. So this tour is our time for us to shake hands with all the people that have been supporting us from different cities that have never got a chance to see us play. We like to have a good time; we’re playing some stuff that will make you boogie around. For bikers living the free life, it makes you want to get on a bike and haul, or just sit down and have a beer. We’re not trying to focus on one demographic, just anybody who is into hard rock. Watching our live performances, watching a band actually perform that is writing good albums from start to finish with no filler songs, that’s somebody who would enjoy what we’re doing right now.

What’s a typical show set?

We’re playing every song off of our album, not a lot of bands do that right now. They play the hits or the ones that are most popular. We’re trying to get it to where we’re playing every single song off every single album. Right now, this album we have, we can play them all live. I think that’s important, to give everybody a chance to hear their favorite song on the album that may be different from someone else. We want to give people a chance to hear “their” song live. We throw in a cover every show, reading the crowd. If we want to pick it up pace we’ll play a little AC/DC, if we wanna take it back on a little trip we’ll do a little Ten Years After cover, we just kind of feel it out and see what needs to happen.

What’s your favorite drink of choice, before going on stage, and after a performance?

For me its definitely gonna be whiskey before, during AND after. I’m not Irish but I probably should be with the amount of whiskey I drink. Ronnie Van Zant from Lynyrd Skynyrd said, “I drink enough whiskey to float a battleship around.” I’ll tell you what, I’m 30 years old and I believe that. We’re on a big Fireball kick right now, or Jager. But we don’t like to get too messed up before we get onstage, we wanna make sure people get their money’s worth. We want to give them a show. We’ll have some drinks on stage, a lot of times we’ll have some buddies or some people we don’t know come put free shots or a couple beers on the stage. And after a show, whatever goes, goes. When we’re

2 Incognito Music, Models, and More (August 2013) incognitomusicmagazine.com4 Incognito Music, Models, and More (August 2013) incognitomusicmagazine.com

drinking, we’re drinking. Except my brother quit drinking. He hasn’t drank in a while. He looks good, fit. We support him. I wish I could do it.

Anything else you would like to add?

We went out touring in California for a couple weeks. Now, we’re thinking of going back on the road, doing an east coast, southern type

touring in the fall/winter. We’ve never gone out to the east coast. Our first tour as Mothership was back in March and then our recent one in June was our second. So basically, we’re talking about getting something coming up soon. We’ll have to see how it goes and see if everything will work out. That’s the plan. I would like to get as close as possible to playing every state in the country.


amantha Hart is the reigning Miss Arizona for Miss U.S. International. Her pictures were shot in Laguna Beach, California, and we think you’ll agree

that they are just what’s needed to get you through the dog days of August. She discusses her studies, being crowned Miss Arizona, and her impressive workout regimen.

Give us your elevator bio.

Okay well, my name is Samantha Joy Hart. I am 24 years old and I am currently studying Business Marketing at Vanguard University of Southern California.

I work as a fashion/Editorial/Print model for Willow Model management. I have had a passion for modeling since the age of 5. I love watching movies and going to the beach as much as possible. Some of my hobbies are beach volleyball and the gym.

What was your reaction when your name was called as Miss Arizona?

I am actually the first contestant to represent Arizona while living in California. I was very

excited to have the opportunity to represent Arizona at the National pageant in Florida since my father’s family lives there. I had competed for the California title where I finished 2nd Runner up and won the title of most photogenic. This gave me the opportunity to represent another state at nationals. I chose Arizona which made me the new Miss Arizona U.S. International 2013.

Describe your experience in Florida with the Miss USA International event.

I had an amazing time in Florida Representing Arizona. I had an amazing team of people with me that included my “momager” Deborah Ireland and my amazing stylist, Hair and make-up artist Karen Bates-Ashley. Karen is amazing to work with and she is very talent-ed with hair. If anyone is looking for someone to hire she is definitely your girl. Find her on Facebook!

You work out a lot. What part of your workout do you dread?

Yes I do work out a lot! I spend about 2 hours sometimes 3 hours in the gym a day. If I had to

S


pick one thing I don’t like it would probably be cardio! I hate running but I have to do it. I think it’s really important to be a healthy role model to my fans so you will never catch me saying that famous model line “I don’t really work out...this is natural” ha ha. I work very hard for my body and it has definitely paid off for me!

What was the best part about shooting with Incognito?

The team I worked with was amazing! I had such a good time on the location and it was a huge pleasure to work with them!

What advice would you give to other models about working with us?

Just be yourself! Show your personality because that is when you have the most fun and create amazing pictures!!

What is the next thing to cross off your bucket list?

I am planning my first trip to Cabo San Lucas for my 25th birthday this year! I love to travel so this trip should be amazing and I plan to do a few photo shoots while I am down there too!


Phot

os c

ourte

sy o

f Geo

rge

Swar

. G

eorg

eSw

ar.c

om

Normally, we choose a beer style and put five examples of that style in our tasting. For this beer panel, the good folks at The Surfin’ Cowboy in Capistrano Beach,California, provided not only five of the beers on tap at the place, but also food pairings with each beer. Most of our usual cast of characters (Adam, Gary, Ian, and Jason) were present for this one. We were also joined by Jens, who has joined us previously, and Willy, the resident beer expert at The Surfin’ Cowboy. In case you’re wondering, Shannon has taken an amazing

job in Beverly Hills so it is no longer convenient for her to join us. Now, before I get on with the reviews, allow me to apologize for an omission on my part. I didn’t think to take pictures of the amazing food that was paired with each beer. What can I say? When you put food on the table for six hungry guys, they’re gonna eat. Now on to the reviews.

Hang Ten, Cowboy

August Beer Reviews


Anchor Steam California LagerFood pairing: Fried calamari with Cajun remou-lade

Technical stuffAdam: It has a slight head, golden color, and smells a bit lemony.Gary: It has a nice malty nose and a pretty clean hop not. The color is hazy gold and it has no head to speak of.Ian: It’s clear with minimal head.Jason: Light golden color with slight head retention.Jens: The head goes away quick. It has a crisp, light malt flavor. It’s yellow and fizzy like a pil-sner.

Willy: It’s golden with good head retention. It has a slight bitter hoppiness and crispness.

TasteAdam: It’s cool, refreshing, hoppy, and light with citrus notes.Gary: It’s very crisp and clean. It’s sweet and malty up front with a clean hop finish.Jason: It’s a solid, easy-drinking lager with a good hop note.Jens: It has a crisp malt flavor with no hops until the end.Willy: It’s crisp with a light, floral hop note. Highly malted.

I would drink this...Adam: Sitting on the deck of my Hinkley yachtGary: On a hot day.Ian: On a hot day, I could have many of these with light food.Jason: While barbecuing on a hot day at the beach.Jens: On a hot day. I would possibly bathe in it.Willy: On a hot summer day. I would recommend this to...Adam: Someone looking to cool off on a hot summer day.Gary: Just about any beer drinker.Ian: Fishermen.Jason: Most beer drinkers. It offers solid taste and drinkability. I could throw back a few.Jens: New-age hipsters so I can get PBR back.Willy: People looking to move toward pale ales and IPAs.

Overall impressionAdam: This would make an excellent session beer. I could see myself drinking a vast quanti-ty of this tasty beverage. It would be great with fried clams.Gary: This is a solid beer. I could while away a hot afternoon drinking this.Jason: It’s a nice lager, easy-drinking with a nice finish.Jens: It’s a solid lager. I have no complaints. It’s the perfect summer beer.Willy: It has a great flavor profile. It’s very crisp and slightly hoppy. It’s a very original style of lager.


Food pairing Adam: The Cajun remoulade is a nice complement to the hops.Gary: The calamari is a nice pairing. The spice in the Cajun remoulade is enhanced with the hop note of the beer.Ian: The spicy, creamy Cajun remoulade and the calamari with freshly-squeezed lemon juice pairs refreshingly with the slight bitter hop note in the beer. Jason: The calamari is a solid pairing. They work well with one another.Jens: It matches well with the calamari. Both are light in flavor. Neither overpowers the other.Willy: This pairs great with seafood. It enhances the flavor of the food without overpowering it.

ScoreAdam: Beer - 8.8, food - 8.1, compatibility - 8.5Gary: Beer - 6.7, food - 9, compatibility - 10Jason: 7.5Jens: Beer - 7, food - 8.9, compatibility - 10Willy: Beer - 8, food - 9, compatibility - 10

Bootleggers Golden Chaos Belgian-style AleFood pairing: Andouille bratwurst topped with caramelized onions on a pretzel roll, served with deep-fried dill pickles and a cilantro-ranch dipping sauce

Technical stuffAdam: It has an impressive head. It’s a murky, golden color and smells wonderful.Gary: It citrusy and sweet. I get orange peel and coriander on the nose. It’s a hazy rust color with a 1/4-inch head and looks like it’s bottle-conditioned.Ian: It has unfiltered cloudiness and a perfect head.Jason: It smells fruity - like bananas. It’s a murky brown color with good head retention.Jens: It smells sweet. The color is murky gold and the head sticks around.Willy: It’s high in yeast. I smell banana and clove. It’s a murky golden color, and frothy with good head retention.

TasteAdam: Holy damn taste bud explosion! This is creamy deliciousness with a lot of complex flavors.Gary: It tastes like it has a good alcohol content. A nice spice note rises up in the middle and it finishes dry.Jason: I get a lot of banana and fruit flavors.Jens: It’s sweet. I get coriander and banana bread.Willy: I taste Belgian yeast, banana, and clove.

I would drink this...Adam: On days I don’t feel like drinking.Gary: With dinner.Ian: On a hot day.Jason: On a special occasion or as a nightcap after a long night of drinking.Jens: In the morning on a boat.Willy: As a great start to an evening of heavy drinking. One of these will put you in your place so drink with caution. I would recommend this to...Adam: Anyone who enjoys Belgian ales. This is one of the better Belgians I’ve tried.Gary: Foodies.


Ian: The refined baseball fan or cricket fan.Jason: Everyone.Jens: Sophisticated hipsters to see them lick the foam off of their pencil mustaches.Willy: Any beer advocate, lovers of Belgian beers, even beginning beer drinkers. It’s very malty and sweet with welcoming flavors.

Overall impressionAdam: I’m not usually a fan of Belgian ales, but I am a big fan of this one.Gary: This is a real good beer, but it’s not an ev-eryday beer.Jason: It’s a very nice, complex beer that finishes nicely.Jens: It’s a solid American version of a Belgian beer.Willy: It has a great flavor profile. It’s very crisp and slightly hoppy. It’s a very original style of lager.

Food pairingAdam: The spice of the brat really enhances the flavor of this beer.Gary: The contrast is what makes this a good pairing. The spice of the sausage is a great com-pliment to the sweetness of the beer.Ian: The sweetness of the super-caramelized on-ion on the flavorful brat goes great on the thick pretzel bun. The saltiness of the pickles and the creaminess of the ranch are a great compliment to the brat. Then you can wash it all down with a cold, refreshing gulp of the golden ale. Jason: The bratwurst with caramelized onions was excellent. With the fried pickles, it was an amazing combo with the beer.Jens: It’s a great mix of flavors. The onion with the beer is awesome and the cilantro ranch played games with the beer.Willy: This pairs great with seafood. It enhances the flavor of the food without overpowering it.

ScoreAdam: Beer - 8.1, food - 8.7, compatibility - 9Gary: Beer - 8.2, food - 10, compatibility - 9Ian: Beer - 9, food - 9, compatibility - 10Jason: Beer - 9, food - 9.5, compatibility - 9Jens: Beer - 6.3, food - 8.5, compatibility - 7.5Willy: Beer - 9, food - 9, compatibility - 9

Deschutes Black Butte PorterFood pairing: Black n bleu sliders with aioli, ba-con jam, bleu cheese crumbles and shallot straws

Technical stuffAdam: It’s the color of root beer with moderate head retention. It smells like my gym socks.Gary: It smells like cocoa. The color is like used motor oil. It gets a 1/4 to 1/2-inch head when you swish it around.Ian: It’s fizzy, dark and sweet.Jason: It’s black and smells like a mocha. The head retention is good.


Jens: It smells smoky. It’s dark and the head is gone quickly.Willy: It smells malty with a charred coffee note. It’s a dark brown.

TasteAdam: I taste sour rye and a burnt coffee bean flavor that makes me sneeze.Gary: It has smoky and cocoa flavors with a nice, dry hop finish.Ian: Awesome.Jason: Chocolate maltiness.Jens: Sweet smoke.Willy: Chocolate and roasted coffee.

I would drink this...Adam: If I died and came back reincarnated as a person with different Taste buds.Gary: If there is an everyday porter, this is it.Jason: As a nightcap.Jens: Rarely. It’s not my type of beerWilly: At a barbecue. I would recommend this to...Adam: A hobo...or Gary apparently.Gary: Anyone who prefers dark beer to light.Ian: Wine-drinking cougars who think beers can’t be for refined palates.Jason: Someone looking for a tasty dessert beer.Jens: Smoking hipsters. It would be a smoky treat for them.Willy: Experienced beer drinkers or Scotch drinkers. This is not for lightweights.

Overall impressionAdam: I did not like it one bit. Even the delicious slider could not save this beer.Gary: I could drink this any day although it wouldn’t be my first choice for real hot days. It goes down real easy.Jason: It’s a nice, rich, chocolatey porter.Jens: It’s a good porter.Willy: This is a great one-and-done beer.

Food pairingAdam: The slider was awesome.Gary: The slider is cooked perfectly and abso-lutely delicious. Bacon jam? Are you kidding me? If ambrosia ever existed, that is it. Still, the preveailing peppery taste of the burger might make an IPA a better beer to pair with it.Ian: The beef is great and perfectly cooked. Slid-ers are frequently overcooked. The fact that these

are somewhat rare, shows confidence in the in-gredients and expert grill skills. Jason: The slider had a ton of flavor that makes me want to come back to this place.Jens: Awesome.Willy: Beef ribs, steak, cheeses.

ScoreAdam: Beer - 4.6, food - 9, compatibility - 7.5Gary: Beer - 8.5, food - 10, compatibility - 7Jason: Beer - 8, food - 9, compatibility - 9Jens: Beer - 5, food - 8.9, compatibility - 9Willy: Beer - 8, food - 10, compatibility - 10

Firestone Wookey Jack Black Rye IPA


Food pairing: Pork belly with tamarind cara-mel sauce served on a corn cake with pickled watermelon rind on the side

Technical stuffAdam: I initially thought it was a stout when I saw the dark brown like used motor oil. It has moderate head retention.Gary: It’s very floral. I smell Cascade Hops. It’s the color of black coffee and opaque with a 1/4-inch head.Jason: It’s dark brown-black. It has a hoppy citrus smell and a slight head.Jens: It smells like rye. It’s deep coffee brown. The head is small but sticks around.

TasteAdam: It Tasted really mild and sweet before the food. Gary: It has a kind of smoky Taste.Jason: Strong citrus fruit and floral Taste, rye.Jens: Rye, hoppy, with a little smoke finish.

I would drink this...Adam: With pork products.Gary: As a nightcap.Ian: In small doses in cold weather or at night.Jason: Often.Jens: Everyday. I would recommend this to...Adam: Folks who enjoy less-hoppy IPAs.Gary: Guys with a smoking jacket and monocle.Ian: A southerner that doesn’t like “fancy food” and a New York “fancy food” eater that doesn’t like southern cuisine. Prove ‘em both wrong.Jason: Everyone.Jens: Hipsters with an attitude: it’s more bitter than they are.

Overall impressionAdam: I would most likely select a different IPA if I were in the mood for an IPA.Gary: It’s a damn fine beer but I can’t imagine drinking this anytime but in the evening - after dinner or before bed.Jason: It’s a very tasty IPA with a nice fruity-rye combo going on.Jens: I love it!

Food pairingAdam: After tasting the food, the rye and hops flavors were greatly enhanced. The food really

accentuates the hops.Gary: This pork belly is one of the best things I have ever eaten. The tamarind sauce is a great compliment to the pork and both work well with the beer. The pickled watermelon rind sort of overpowers the beer, which is not easy to do.Ian: With the super-sweet and delicious tama-rind-caramel sauce and salty pork on a whole-some corn pancake, it’s dinner and dessert in one bite. Then the beer resets the palate. Jason: The pork belly with the corn cake was outstanding and the pickled watermelon rind paired nicely with the IPA.Jens: The pork belly - WOW! The pickled water-melon rind lost me.

ScoreAdam: Beer - 7.5, food - 9.2, compatibility - 9.6Gary: Beer - 8, food - 10, compatibility - 7.5Jason: Beer - 9.5, food - 9, compatibility - 9Jens: Beer - 9.5, food - 9.5, compatibility - 9.5

Ballast Point Sea Monster StoutFood pairing: Sticky toffee pudding with maple bacon and bourbon sauce

Technical stuffAdam: It’s dark as a gargoyle’s eyeball with a slight head. I smell burnt chocolate and coffee.Gary: Somehow I don’t smell much of anything. How much more black could it be? The answer is none. None more black. Jason: It’s dark brown-black. It has a hoppy cit-rus smell and a slight head.Jens: It smells sweet and roasty. It’s black.

TasteAdam: Yummy yummy in my tummy.. Gary: Holy cow! that is a big flavor and tastes like a big alcohol content. It’s very dry. I taste an-ise and molasses. Jason: It’s a strong stout.Jens: Sweet chocolate and a hint of licorice.Willy: It’s smooth and silky with a big alcohol finish. I taste chocolate and currant notes.

I would drink this...Adam: When I am getting ready to fight a sea monster or kill a guy with a trident.Gary: Just about anytime I could. It’s a heavy-duty beer, but it goes down real easy.Jason: With dessert.


Jens: On a dark and stormy night to keep warm.Willy: As a nightcap...or for those who want to get wrecked before noon. I would recommend this to...Adam: Anyone who wants a tasty stout.Gary: Anyone needing a good night’s sleep.Jason: Someone who likes dessert.Jens: No hipsters! They don’t deserve a beer this good.Willy: Any connoisseur of strong beers.

Overall impressionAdam: I love this beer! I would take a bath in it.Gary: A sample is not enough. I need a whole bottle of this and then I’ll say good night.Ian: It’s a great, sweet, thick, creamy stout. I think you could use this for beer floats or shakes.Jason: It’s a good stout - very heavy. It’s defi-nitely something that can put you to bed.Jens: Awesome beer!Willy: It’s an aggressive stout - not on par with Old Rasputin, but not far behind its path.

Food pairingAdam: Bacon!Gary: I feel like I just overdosed...in a good way. Could there be a better combination than toffee, bacon, and bourbon? Jason: The pudding was very interesting and tasty.Jens: Ridiculous! Wow! Crown Royal sauce! This beer and dessert together is heaven.Willy: Chocolate desserts.

ScoreAdam: Beer - 9, food - 9.6, compatibility - 9Gary: Beer - 9, food - 10, compatibility - 10Ian: Beer - 10, food - 10, compatibility - 10Jason: Beer - 8, food - 8, compatibility - 8Jens: Beer - 9.2, food - 10, compatibility - 10Willy: Beer - 8, food - 9, compatibility - 9


You all came from different bands previously. How did this band come together?

Dylan Rhodes: It came together out of a rough thing. A friend of ours that we’d been playing with for a long time passed away. We were all just hanging out and thinking that we shouldn’t just not play music. Jason came to all of us individually and suggested that we get together and play music, so we did.

Matt: Two-thirds of the band Crapulence was Dylan and Jason. I used to hang out with Jason, well I still do sometimes. It was born out of weirdness which works pretty well because we’re weird people.

Do you think that helps strengthen you as a band, that you were born of bad circumstances?

DR: In a sense. It helped me appreciate the things I have. I think if we can survive something like

that, we can survive anything.

M: Part of it also, I’ll speak for myself...if I didn’t keep making music, I’d probably be dead myself.

Tell me about your guerilla style to composing songs.

(both laugh)

M: There’s a couple different methods we choose to cultivate. That guerilla style is based on our lyrics. Basically what we do is look at our world and say, “Look, it’s not as cool a place to be in as when we were five or 10.” For all intents and purposes, it seems to be getting worse. However, we need to look at this in the sense...you have to retain your silliness. You have to keep your chin up. The words come to us out of silliness and absurdity and the paradoxical nature of the way the system is set up. For example, “Abusing My Inner Child,” some of the lyrics are “I’m living out of my car.” I wasn’t waxing poetic when I wrote that. I was actually living out of my damn car.

DR: What he really meant was gorilla. We make music through brute force.

M: Part of the guerilla approach can be demonstrated in our song “The Lesson,”

olid Goat is a four-piece rock band from Austin, Texas, that was named best new lo-cal act by the Austin Chronicle. By phone,

SDylan Rhodes (guitar) and Matt Sz (guitar, vo-cals) discussed the band’s beginnings, the band’s “guerrilla style” of composing songs, and what they’d be doing if they weren’t making music.

Solid Goat


for which I have to give the Department of Homeland Security partial lyrical credit. We used just about their entire keyword list in those lyrics.

That’s a credit for them. I’m not sure they’d want it.

M: They’re not getting paid, but they get credit. They work on the black budget, so that’s cool.

What did it mean to you when you were named the best new act in Austin?

DR: It was cool. I was stoked. It was totally unexpected.

M: I kind of thought it was a mistake. (laughs)

DR: Maybe he’d had one too many compressed air canisters. It was great and kind of breathed new life into us I think.

However much credence you put into that, it’s always nice to have someone recognize what you’re doing. What’s the craziest thing that happened at one of your recent shows?

DR: All of our recent shows went smooth like clockwork. Everything stayed on time. That was probably the craziest thing - that everything went right.

M: That’s always surprising to me too that things are flawless. We get up on stage with a certain attitude and I’m kind of at a loss. I don’t drink as much as I used to so I can’t say it’s the alcohol, but when I get up on stage...the next day I don’t even remember. I don’t think I’m the same guy on stage as I am in everyday life.

I don’t know if you can be, can you?

M: Probably not. As soon as I hit the stage, I’m in this mood and I have to ask how it went.

That shows that you’re very much in the moment.

DR: Losing yourself in music is a cool thing.

Why should I have the new album in my collection?

Phot

os c

ourte

sy o

f The

Mah

ones

.

DR: I’m a little biased, but it came out much better than I expected. It sounds great. I have not gotten tired of listening to it yet. I’m proud of it. My sister loves it.

M: People who don’t normally listen to our kind of music are really turning their heads. They say, “This is not what I expected and I really like it.”

That has to be as complimentary as any writer naming you best new act.

M: One of the reasons you should have it in your collection is we’re redefining...There’s so many genres...Take punk for instance. On ReverbNation, you only get so many options for what style of music you are. I guess I just went by what our influences are. I come from a punk rock background. I don’t really think that what we do is punk rock.

DR: There’s elements of punk rock to it.

M: There’s certainly some roots. When you get down to brass tacks of what we do, you’d be hard-pressed to find another band that fits the genre we’re inventing. It’s hard to go by what’s already there. There’s no option for apocalyptic space punk on these things so we try to fit into whatever niche we can and pretend like we can do it better.

What would you be doing if you weren’t making music?

DR: I’d be doing the same thing I’m doing now: working.

M: I am so uncertain of that question that I can’t even see myself being alive if I weren’t making music. I started to play guitar about 31 years ago, and started writing songs when I was 15. It’s so ingrained that I can hardly walk down the street without writing a song in my head.

DR: I can’t imagine my life without music. It’s so important to me. It’s been the most consistent thing in my life. It’s there and it will always be there. Even if I were to lose my limbs, I would still have music running through my brain.


The Merritts of MixologyDickel Punch

by Carin Merritt

I’m in no way - even if I tried to fake it - a simple human being. That being said, I share many of the same traits as the rest of the population by using habit and routine as my guide through certain aspects of life.

This innate human characteristic, directly relating to alcohol, becomes more apparent when I people watch at bars. Yes, I’m creepy as well.

I know someone is lacking years of experience and refinement when they confidently order Grey Goose or Patron silver, thinking by name

dropping a brand they appear knowledgeable. They really appear to be followers or victims of smart marketing.

This brings me to Fireball, the fastest-growing fad I’ve ever witnessed since Jager Bombs had their reign at fraternity parties and the Jersey shore. And no, I’m not going to advocate it, even though I am guilty of consuming more than my fair share of the cinnamon whiskey shots. It’s only 35% alcohol, which is pretty average, but the guaranteed hangover is simply not worth it.

Phot

o co

urte

sy o

f Car

in M

errit

t.


In turn, this brings me to discuss a whiskey I can stand behind, George Dickel Rye whisky. Admittedly, the name itself did spark my inter-est; I am human afterall. We could have a field day with the one-liners, but I’ll spare you.

What I love about the Dickel whisky is its layers of flavor. According to cocktailenthusiest.com, “Master Distiller John Lunn created this product to address the increased demand for rye in the marketplace.”

George Dickel Rye whisky, spelt with a -y (not -ey), is aged in new charred oak barrels for a minimum of five years and boasts 45% alcohol content. Dickel contains a thick, almost spicy taste with a lingering of sweetness and a surpris-ing hint of citrus. Its fullness is unique for a rye, especially for its age.

My initial reaction when dealing with scotches is to simply leave them alone. They are served great straight-up or with a couple of ice cubes. When it comes to whiskey, however, highlight-ing specific flavors is more fun and acceptable.

George’s Dickel Rye, with its unique citrus quality, is great to enhance using citrus fruit as a mixture. With no pun intended, I’d like to introduce to you the Dickel Punch, a simple three-part cocktail: 2 oz. whisky, 1 oz. grapefruit juice, and a dash or two of grenadine to ease the bite.

In this mixture, Dickel maintains its flavor with a female-friendly approach. The drink is served in a rocks glass, on ice, with an orange slice and cherry garnish. It should appear as a bright pink color, as the grenadine slightly alters the grape-fruit.

Dickel Punch is sweet, refreshing and will do nothing similar to what its name implies, unless you have one too many, which is a whole other story for a whole different day.


Have You Heard?

The Congregation (Chicago)thecongregationband.comPhoto: CB LindseyThe first time I heard this band, it was a com-plete revelation. This is one of those bands where as soon as I had heard the album Right Now Everything, I wanted to let everyone know about this amazing band. Why did I feel compelled to share this with everyone? Well, because it advertises itself as R&B. And you know something? This is real R&B, not that watered down electronic and vocal crap that gets passed as R&B these days. The organ, backing vocals, and hand claps give the music a real 60s feel. And then there are Gina Bloom’s vocals. Let me tell you something. This woman has some soul and she reminds me of Hannah Williams. The Congregation is a fitting name for this band because some of the songs have a gospel feel that will make you think of the scene in the church in Blues Brothers. If you want real R&B and soul, join The Congrega-tion. Can I get an Amen?

Fabulous Go Go Boy from Alabama (Sao Paolo, Brazil)www.facebook.com/thefabulousgogoboyPhoto: Carol DoroNo, that’s not a misprint. This one-man band has Alabama in his name but is from Brazil. Where he’s from is irrelevant once you hear him play and sing. He plays with a furious energy (just check out some of his videos on YouTube) and sings with a voice that is as deep as Country Dick Montana. It’s hard to imagine a more primitive sound than what comes from this guy. “Uga Buga Man” sounds like what might have happened if a caveman had a guitar. And no, I don’t say that like it’s a bad thing. Frankly, I think it’s great. The amazing thing about one-man bands is that they get their entire body involved when performing a song while a lot of us struggle just to play one instrument. If you like trashy, primitive rock and roll, check out Fabulous Go Go Boy from Alabama.

incognitomusicmagazine.com Incognito Music, Models, and More (March 2013) 22

The Sweetback Sisters (Brooklyn)thesweetbacksisters.com

If you’re like me, you might wonder where real country music was gone. Like any other genre, you can find good country music if you really look for it. One day while browsing on Bandcamp, I came across The Sweetback Sisters. And let me tell you something, loyal reader. This band (from Brooklyn of all places) plays real country music. It’s twangy and heartfelt, and has tremendous harmonies. Seriously, any one of the songs on Looking for a Fight could stand up to that Girls of the Big D Jamboree compilation. The songs after all are about broken hearts, broken relationships, and drinking. This is country music that is closer to Loretta Lynn and Charline Arthur than Taylor Swift...and thank goodness for that. If you lament the state of country music because it doesn’t sound like the country you grew up with, check out The Sweetback Sisters. This band brings back memories of what country music used to be.

T-Bird and the Breaks (Austin, TX)www.tbirdandthebreaks.com

It’s not often I write about a band after hearing only a couple of its songs. With T-Bird and the Breaks, I’m willing to make that exception. The first song I heard from this band is “Somebody Had a Drinking Problem Last Night.” (Honestly, loyal reader can you pass up a song with that title?) This is an amazing song that combines doo-wop, soul, and some trashy rock and roll. I’m not kidding when I say this brings Jon Spencer (specifically Heavy Trash) to mind. It’s a brilliant song not only because it is an agglomeration of uptempo styles, but also because it’s about drinking. At the time of this writing, the only other song the band has available on Bandcamp is a cover of “No Diggity.” This soulful cover brings Dr. John to mind. Seriously, it is that soulful and funky. If you like some soul in your music, check out T-Bird and The Breaks.


album reviews

Trucker DiabloSongs of Iron (Ripple Music, 2011)truckerdiablo.comPhoto courtesy of Ripple MusicSome albums grab your attention like a punch to the gut. Songs of Iron is one of those albums. Granted, the sound is a lot more pleasant than a punch to the gut, but it gets your attention just as effectively. “Red Light On” is a song that immediately makes it clear: this band believes in playing loud and fast. The guitar solo is a good taste of things to come, particularly in the next song “Year of the Truck.” If you like loud songs played by guys who can completely shred, then you will love “Year of the Truck.” This is a song that begs to be played out of windows, whether they be on your car or your house.

I’m sure a lot of people would wrongly label Trucker Diablo a metal band. Mind you, this band has some of the elements of metal, but this is just a freaking great (and loud) rock n roll band like Clutch. Speaking of which...the intro to “Rebel” reminds me a lot of Clutch.

Here’s a question for you. Do you miss gui-tar solos? Then Trucker Diablo is the band for you. There is no shortage of solos on this album and the guy shreds. If you like bands that are unabashedly loud and fast, then Trucker Diablo will fit right into your collection.

Massy FergusonVictory and Ruins (Spark and Shine Records, 2013)massyfergusonband.comPhoto courtesy of Spark and Shine RecordsThe press kit for Massy Ferguson says this band is recommended if you like The Jayhawks, The Backsliders, The Bottle Rockets, etc. I can’t argue. Victory and Ruins is not only a celebration of roots rock, but also of good songwriting. Bassist Ethan Anderson not only lays down a good bass line, but also tells a good story. It’s bands like this that make me wary of using the alt-country label, which is where a lot of folks would undoubtedly file this band. The thing is, when you call it alt-country, it kind of overlooks the rock component of the music. Sure, Massy Ferguson has its roots in country, but it also rocks. If you’re looking for one particular song recommendation on this album, I’d say “2 AM Beauty Queen.” This song has layers of sound (including excellent harmony vocals) that come at you from all sides. And let’s face it. We’ve all met our share of 2 AM beauty queens. I have no doubt that if you like The Bottle Rockets, you will like this band. I recommend putting this album on when you start your next road trip. You might just find you leave it on for the duration of the trip.


I Can Lick Any Sonofabitch in the HouseMayberryicanlickanysob.comPhoto: Paul ResnickWhen I think about bands that are most likely to write an album called Mayberry, this one isn’t the first one that comes to mind. And yet there it is. Maybe it’s not quite as dark as previous ICLASOBITH albums, but the sound hasn’t changed. This is still a gritty rock n roll band with a harmonica. I’ll say this. I don’t know why more rock bands don’t have a harmonica. It’s a quick and easy way to do something different than every other four-piece rock band out there. Maybe the reason more rock bands don’t use a harmonica is because not everyone plays harp like David Lipkind. Just listen to “Break All Your Strings” for a good example of his chops.

Another thing that sets this band apart is its strong lyrical content. Whether Mike Damron sings about beign “tired of all the hatred and violence in the world” or giving up on “justice, I don’t see that anywhere,” he is not afraid to speak his mind. And isn’t that what rock n roll is all about? Saying what’s on your mind no matter what. If you like straightforward southern rock, you’ll love the new album from this band. And if you get the chance, check out this band live. You won’t be disappointed.

The Welch BoysBring Back the Fight (Sailor’s Grave Records, 2013)thewelchboys.netPhoto courtesy of Sailor’s Grave RecordsI could make this real simple and say that if you like real punk, you should get this album. And that’s true, but it doesn’t tell you much about the album. This band from Boston proves again that Boston bands know a thing or two about playing music that is loud and fast. Seriously, songs like “Hit It and Quit It” are so fast, you’ll have a hard time keeping up. Not only that, but this band does some of the fastest drinking songs you’ve ever heard. The song “Whiskey and Beer” is a great example. It is a celebration of two tremendous beverages that lasts only for a minute and a half. Hey, these guys get right to the point saying, “I want whiskey and beer.”

The lead vocalist sings in a low throaty growl and the backing vocals bring Dropkick Murphys to mind. If you’re looking for ballads or even one song where the band slows down the tempo, keep looking. However, if you like your music loud and fast, this album will fit right into your collection.


If I’mU sounds familiar, it’s because another member (Stuart Miller, drums) of the band has also contributed to The Guest List with five underrated hip-hop albums. Guitarist Michael Espinach takes his turn with a list of five albums less than 30 minutes long that you should know. Note to all of our southern California readers: if you see this band perform, introduce yourself afterward. Talking to these guys is thoroughly enjoyable.

wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

The effect that music has on a listener is almost indefinable, and is usually reduced to the description of common words as “happy,” “sad,” or simply making someone want to “rock out.” As a listener of a variety of sounds, it leaves an impression on me when a piece of music can make me feel several things - almost paradoxically - all at once. Euphoria in the same instant as confusion or even fear? It is possible. Here is a list of mind-bending albums and EPs, less than thirty minutes in duration. It is important to note that is not a matter of ranking, but rather a sequential order in which to experience these works. Enjoy the trip. Trash Talk - 119

A hardcore album in less than thirty minutes is not a foreign concept at all, considering the point of punk rock has always been a swift kick in the ass. However, making a succinct statement is not always guaranteed. Trash Talk, a Los Angeles-based punk group, have been around more than a few years. Their most recent outing, 119, is a beautiful exercise in the tradition of hardcore. Firing right out of the gate with “Eat the Cycle,” singer Lee Spielman asks, “Are you bored of your boredom?,” acknowledging the necessary evil of day jobs. Three tracks down, we are catapulted into the lead single, “F.E.B.N.,” which will have you screaming “Forward Ever Backwards Nev-er,” reminding you the future is always ahead,

The Guest List: 5 30-minute Mind-benders

by Michael Espinach of I’mU

Michael Espinach

Photo courtesy of Justin Poon.

and to forge on. The state of a poverty-stricken society is brought to light in “Exile on Broad-way,” and global mortality rates are addressed in the powerful 28 seconds of “For The Lesser Good.” Songs such as “Bad Habit,” make this album so relevant, as there is a deeply personal tinge to the context of the carnage. This album is not about whining, it is about being aware. Slayer – Reign in Blood

Yes, I know you have read a lot about this album. You’ve heard the horror stories and the contro-versies. This album is the definition of brutal, with some of the most macabre lyrics put to tape. However, if you were to take the needle off the record for the sole purpose of escaping its vo-cal attack, you would be missing out on some of the most influential, melodic thrash-metal tunes ever concocted. The sheer precision of these musicians is mesmerizing. Kerry King and Jeff


Hanneman’s shared guitar riffs on tracks such as the intense album opener, “Angel of Death,” serve to have you playing air guitar in the car-pool lane, melodically driving the song into punk immediacy and surges of wailing noise. Dave Lombardo’s drum work on “Criminally Insane,” is both hypnotizing and bone-crushing, ripping out your heart and holding it in front of your awestruck face. The title track is undoubtedly a classic, with Tom Araya’s bass work sounding like a swarm of bees tracking you down to their last breath. Yes, this album is frightening. How-ever, when you set your fear aside this 30 min-utes of carnage will numb your ears to anything remotely softer, which is probably about 95% of anything else you listen to today.

HEALTH – S/T

A shocking, physical, frightening, yet ecstatic album, HEALTH’s self-titled debut album will go down as a pioneer. Taking on the genre of “Noise rock,” this album is characterized by stop-start assertiveness, feedback-laden drones, skin-shredding guitars, and a mind-blowing ar-senal of drums. Every song on here is classic; “Crimewave,” being a fan favorite. Its frantic drumming, cut-to-the-chase song structure, and heaving noise attacks leaves the listener in a com-plete daze within two minutes. “Zoothorns,” showcases a HEALTH-trademark: microphones channeled through guitar-rig processing. Be-sides the drums, every sound in the song is done vocally, but to a completely claustrophobic and sinister effect. The listener is surrounded by echoing yelps and pitched-down mantras until being decimated by a wave of pure distortion and loops among the cymbal crashes. The 2nd track, “Girl Attorney,” is the main reason why I even chose to explore this topic of concise al-bums. In less than 40 seconds, HEALTH delivers a slice of thrash heaven. This song stands out so much because it took me multiple listens to fully understand its premise, which to my interpreta-tion is a pop-structured song set on blazing-fast-forward. It’s reasons like this that I beg you to throw this album on at volume 11 and release all inhibitions.

Massive Attack Vs. Burial – Four Walls/Para-dise Circus

Massive Attack, a forefather of Trip-hop from the 90’s, and Burial, a UK garage/dub/2-step artist, have merged their efforts on this release. “Four Walls,” is an absolutely haunting dirge that breathes heavily, making the listener feel as if he or she is contained within a room of their own fears. The track does not prove to scare, more to reveal the dark corners of the subconscious, plodding along one’s mind to find an answer you know is there. “Paradise Circus” is that answer, an incredibly emotional hymn of sorts. Whereas the former is a menacing blend of reds, purples, grays, and blacks, this is utterly white and silver, taking the listener to a place of still-ness and silent reflection. The drum sounds are trademark Burial; very minimal but so perfect, especially considering the feel of these tunes. Hope Sandoval’s vocals are outstanding, having both a melancholic longing sense, to being pow-erful and fragile in the same note. This album is at once the energy-depleted raver, slowly trans-forming into the solemn yet optimistic reborn. A beautiful piece of music with both tracks sit-ting at around 12 minutes each, you must allow yourself to experience this work of art.

Ecstatic Sunshine – Way EP

A gorgeous EP from Baltimore, Ecstatic Sun-shine have crafted a sprawling set of three songs that are the perfect meditation companion to any listener. The opener, “B” sets off on a dizzy-ing barrage of delayed guitar notes, taking your mind in multiple directions, emptying out into the noise drone that is “Herrons,” an electronic wash that slowly dissipates the ego into a cloud of fuzz. Out of the ether comes the transcendent “Perrier,” with layers of complimentary and re-petitive riffs that slowly raise the listener to un-heard-of heights, watching as the world below grows smaller and smaller. What makes this al-bum so essential to this list of 30-minute works is what it accomplishes in that amount of time. Whereas the thrash heavy albums towards the beginning of the list served to pummel you into submission, fiercely empower you, or both, this album does the same but in a much more intro-verted way. It’s about finding that spark of pu-rity that reminds of something a bit deeper than the surface battles, something that can only be attained through inner conflict and resolution. Ecstatic Sunshine show…well…the Way.


The FlashbackSasquatch

IISmall Stone Recordings (2006)

If you’ve spent any time reading our blog, you know that I am a big fan of Small Stone Record-ings. This is a record label that specializes in mu-sic that rocks. The good folks there believe in big, fuzzy guitar riffs that beg to be played at ridiculously loud volumes.

Sasquatch perfectly fits the mold of Small Stone artists. The album begins with some pure fuzzed-out heavy-rock goodness that gives you a good taste of what is to come. It should only take a couple seconds before your head is mov-ing up and down. And if for some reason, the beginning of the song doesn’t get you moving, just wait until you hear the guitar solo.

The opener is followed by “The Judge.” This song brings Soundgarden to mind, especial-ly with the vocals. If anything, I would say that Sasquatch works a better groove than Soundgarden. At the end of the song, all of the instruments rise to a crescendo that makes you want to crakn the volume even higher...if that’s possible.

This album is great not only for fans of heavy rock. It’s also great for those who say rock n roll is dead. Granted, there is a lot of lukewarm rubbish music out there, but if you can say rock is dead, you haven’t heard the guitar solo at the end of “Barrel of a Gun.” Whether or not you

play guitar, you might find yourself listening to that repeatedly - just to remind yourself that something as glorious as a guitar solo has not gone extinct.

Loyal reader, I’m not going to overanalyze this. It’s real simple. If you like: loud fuzzy guitars that can crank out solos like nobody’s business, bass notes that will rumble your guts, and drums that sound like they’re being beaten into submission, then this album is for you. Indeed, rock n roll is not dead. It lives - loudly - at Small Stone Records. If you want some music that will get your fist pumping, check out the second album from Sasquatch.


CinephileMovie Reviews

By Rachel “Rae” Park

Hello, hello! It’s been quite some time since we’ve last seen each other, Incognito readers! I’m sure you missed us during our long break. It’s good to be back again to write movie reviews for this magazine. There’s been a fair handful of movies that I’ve seen during the magazine’s hiatus. Of course, there’s only room for the usual three, but that means I had to be pretty choosy about which films to feature this month. As a result, I decided to highlight what I thought was the top three best so far this summer, though excluding releases that came out in August since I haven’t really watched any this month. For more reviews, please be sure to check out my blog! The link to it is at the end of this article, as always. Now, without further ado, the reviews!

Pacific Rim

Starrring: Charlie Hunnam, Diego Klattenhoff, Idris Elba, Rinko Kikuchi, Charlie Day, Burn Gorman, Max Martini, Robert Kazinsky Runtime: 131 minutes

Talk about a surprise. I initially had no desire to see this movie. The trailer never captured me, and I wasn’t really hearing a lot of buzz about it, one way or the other. What got me to go was the fact that a friend and I wanted to kill some time, and this was the only movie out that neither of us had seen, so we decided to take the risk. This was the same friend I went to see Cloud Atlas with, which had also been a spontaneous experience. Needless to say, we were wary and skeptical. Fortunately though, our expectations were well exceeded.

The acting was a little uneven and actors that did have chemistry with each other had their story arcs cut off too soon, which was very disappointing. Aside from that though, I found this movie to be a solid effort, and I look forward to the sequel.

Turbo Featuring: Ryan Reynolds, Paul Giamatti, Michael Peña, Samuel L. Jackson, Luis Guzmán, Bill Hader, Maya Rudolph, Snoop DoggRuntime: 96 minutes


I had heard so many bad things about this movie, so my expectations were pretty low going in. I had read critics say that Ryan Reynolds’ voice acting brought nothing to the table, but I actually think his natural speaking voice helped make Turbo the snail incredibly adorable and ap-pealing. For the most part, the kids in the theater I was in, along with the parents were laughing pretty consistently throughout, as was I.

The lesson here: don’t believe everything critics say, myself included. I say go watch this one and see for yourself!

The Wolverine

Starring: Hugh Jackman, Brian Tee, Famke JanssenRuntime: 126 minutes

For the most part, the trailer tells you everything you need to know about this one. The story is fairly predictable, and there are plenty of plot holes and cheesy moments littered throughout. However, the movie is definitely visually stunning, and if you’re not a fan of Hugh Jackman or the Wolverine, you most certainly will be by the end of the film. The way the movie’s story is set up and the way the character of Wolverine is built up within it, by the end, it’s difficult not to root for our favorite clawed hero. If you haven’t seen this in theaters yet, I suggest that you go and do so.

The Ratings

5 Stars: A great movie that can be considered timeless or classic. (Equivalent to an A+)

4.5 Stars: Solid story, but may leave a few plot ends loose or there may be inconsistencies. (Equivalent to an A, A-)

4 Stars: Good story, but there’s clear room for improvement in some areas. (Equivalent to a B+, B)

3.5 Stars: A movie lacking in “wow” factor. (Equivalent to a B-)

3 Stars: Flat average viewing experience; not great, but not horrible either. (Equivalent to a C+)

2.5 Stars: A movie that passes the time; watch in theaters if you have an itch to see a movie. (Equivalent to a C)

2 Stars: More of a DVD rental type of movie. (Equivalent to a C-)

1.5 Stars: Very difficult to stay interested; at times seems to drag or go on too long. (Equivalent to a D+)

1 Star: Very little perks; consider as a rainy day movie. (Equivalent to a D)

1/2 Star: A very select few may enjoy this movie.(Equivalent to a D-)

0 Stars: Boring; great movie to catch your Z’s in–may have been a pain to finish or impossible to finish–possibly even a movie someone would walk out on. (Equivalent to an F)

Ratings scale based on, but differs slightly fromcuttingedgecreativity.wordpress.com. Visit CEC for more extensive reviews of each of these movies, including those not featured in Incognito due to space limitations.


Don’t Be That GuyYou see him when you enter his cubicle to ask him about a project you’re working on because he is the office authority on the topic. You sit down in his guest chair and say, “Uh yeah, so I’m working on this project, and you know this stuff best. I was wondering if you could help me with...” And you present him with what seems like a fairly innocuous question that will help you finish your project. He blinks a couple times as if he doesn’t understand your question. So you rephrase it. He ponders your question for a moment. “I think I know what you mean, but you’re not really asking the right question.”Before you can plead ignorance, he grabs a dry-erase marker and starts drawing on his whiteboard.

“You see, what you really want to know is this.” He starts drawing a diagram and now you’re confused not only by the words coming out of his mouth, but also the diagram. He’s speak-ing English, but the content is nothing you can understand. You’re already swamped by the beginning of his discussion on the matter, and then he starts giving you a lesson on how this particular project used to operate. This of course requires another diagram. As soon as the word algorithm enters the explanation, you feel as helpless as a chihuahua swept out by the tide. You realize you have no option but to just settle back into the guest chair and wait until he’s done. After all, even if you could stop him, you wouldn’t know what question to ask. Not to mention that you’d probably just be asking the wrong question again.

As you try to take it all in, you’re completely floored by something else. You see this guy in the hall and you exchange hellos but he’s never engaged in a conversation with you. Apparently, you just didn’t know what topic to discuss with him.

He fills up his entire whiteboard, using four different colors of marker. You have no idea what the color code is, which is just as well because all of the diagrams are a complete mystery to you.

“So, to make a short story long, there is the

answer to your question.” He chuckles. “Do you have any other questions?”

Your mind is swimming with questions and you have no idea where to begin, so you say, “Ummmmmm...no. That wraps it all up for me.” He beams at a job well done.

You know him. He means well, but he can’t help that he’s way smarter than you. He is the guy who leaves you more confused about your project than when you started talking to him. Don’t be that guy.


ASK UNCLE SAL

Hey Uncle Sal,

The other day, I seen that video of the Swedish Chef where he uses a blunderbuss to get some pancakes off the ceiling. I ain’t got no flapjacks stuck up there, but there’s this wasp carcass been stuck up there for a few months now. I suppose the only thing holdin that car-cass up there is all them dusty cobwebs. I ain’t got a ladder tall enough to reach it. Ya think using a blun-derbuss on the thing is a good way to get rid of it? Flap Jack Spratt

Ummmm...boy, I gotta hand it to ya readers. You sure know how to come up with some questions I ain’t never considered before. Yer questions usu-ally make me pose questions of my own. Now, the first question I gotta ask ya is: do ya have access to a blunderbuss? If yer answer is yes, I gotta follow up with: what year is this? Maybe ya think it’s 1808. In that case, I gotta reckon ya were pretty spooked by the moving picture of the Swedish Chef. Not to mention all the cars ya see. It ain’t exactly horses and wagons these days, is it? But I guess I’m missing the big point, which is how did you get here from the 1800s?

Anywho...to answer yer question. I can’t really say I recommend usin’ a blunderbuss to get a wasp carcass off yer ceiling...especially if ya got some-one livin’ over ya. I reckon they wouldn’t be too happy about a giant whole in their floor. Might I suggest usin’, oh I dunno, a broom or sump’n to get that wasp off yer ceiling. Sure, it’s got less firepower, but it just might work. Oh, and if ya think a blunderbuss is a kitchen implement, re-mind me never to eat at yer place.

Hey Uncle Sal dude:

Me and my buddy want to throw a party next week, but we’re strapped for cash. Can you give us the reci-pe for ice so we don’t have to buy none? Thanks, pal.

Layne in Loddendale

Hold on a minute there, Layne. Ya had me won-derin’ if it’s pappy’s moonshine instead of wa-ter in this tall glass of mine. OK, who am I kid-din’? It ain’t water neither. It’s vodka and soda. Still, it ain’t eight ounces of Pappy’s moonshine. I gotta say, it’s quite a tough spot yer in there. I mean I know prices of everything have gone up, but I didn’t know the cost of ice was prohibi-tive. That makes me wonder if ya got a freezer. I mean, a freezer is more expensive than a bag of ice. Maybe I can help ya out here. The freezer is the thing that holds yer Hot Pockets and it’s above (or maybe it’s next to) the fridge, which is the thing that holds yer beer. I’m pretty sure ya got one of them. Unless ya got a still out back and ya don’t need to bother with a fridge because your own homemade shine is the only thing ya drink. Say, all this talk of moonshine is gettin’ me to thinkin’ about that jug of Pappy’s shine I got buried out in the backyard.

But that ain’t what ya asked me, is it? Ya asked me for the recipe fer ice. Now, pay attention, Layne. This is real important and yer gonna want to write this down. Get a pencil. Or cray-on. Or maybe burn the end of a stick so ya can write this on the wall of yer hovel. On second thought, it’s prolly best if ya don’t play with fire. Or sticks. Anywho...to make ice, here’s what ya do. Get ya some ice trays. (Ya can get ‘em at the dollar store so ya won’t ruin yer budget...hopefully.) Fill them ice trays with water. Then take them full ice trays and put ‘em in the freez-er. Repeat as necessary. Oh, and when ya host this party, make sure ya got yer address pinned to yer shirt so the cab driver knows where to take ya at the end of the night.

Well, that does ‘er for another edition of Ask Uncle Sal. I really am gonna dig up that moonshine I got buried in my backyard. Keep them questions comin’ (hey, if I can answer questions like these, I can answer any question) to [email protected].


In Our Next Issue...

Plus:

•Our model Vanessa gets you ready for football season•Reviews of ESBs•Another knockout cocktail from our resident mixologist, Carin•Film reviews by our CinePhile, Rae•Lizard McGee of Earwig provides The Guest List with movie tie-ins to rock and roll

AND MORE!

Everyone can always use good vibes. We bring the good vibes to you by way of interviews with Big Sugar and Natty Nation.Photo: CG Photography (Madison, WI)

See you aga

in in Octobe

r!


INCOGNITOmusic, models, and more

Vol. 14, August 2013Rock N’ Roll Texas BBQ

Incognito Music, Models, and More (Issue 14, August 2014)

Documents

Transcript of Incognito Music, Models, and More (Issue 14, August 2014)