Hunger for Love

7/29/2019 Hunger for Love

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CHAPTER ONE


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"What do you mean, we all have to leave?" Emer Nugent demandedasshe stared at the "Notice to Quit" clutched in her hand.

She looked up for confirmation of her worst fears from the bailiff,the aptly named Mr. Penny, to which she always silently added theword 'pinching' for more than one reason.

Mr. Penny sidled nearer, and Emer nearly gagged as the stench ofstale whiskey hit her.

"You know the harvests have been very poor anyway for the last fewyears, but this here potato famine has been the end of hislordship, as it has been for many other of the gentry hereabouts inCounty Meath.

"Lord Devlin has been kind enough to pay all your passages. Ratherthan have you fight over who gets to go to Canada, the land of milk

and honey as everyone says, you're all to be cleared off, and theestate sold."

Mr. Penny leered at her. "Now of course, if you've a mind toforget all about marrying Garvan Dillon, and come settle in thegatehouse with me, I might consider letting you and the rest of thefamily stay."

Emer's unusual aqua eyes, the colour of the sea, narrowed at once.She tossed her mane of rich burgundy hair as she replied, "I'msorry. Garvan and I are betrothed. Under no circumstances could I

ever consider breaking that arrangement to marry the likes of you.You've brought us to this pass, Mr. Penny, skimming as much as youcould off the estate funds for your drinking and gambling, whilecollecting the rents month after month on cottages falling downaround our ears. When my father was so foolish as to finally fixhis roof a year or two back, you doubled the rent on his cottage!

"For the past two years the potatoes have failed, yet you've donenothing but squeeze all the tenants even harder for their rent.You've taken the very food out of their mouths rather than allowthem to fall into arrears and trust that they will all pay you back

when times get better.

"And now that the English government is demanding higher taxes perhead on each estate, you're trying to tell me his lordship is beinggenerous in forcing us to emigrate? That's nonsense!"

"What else can you call paying your fare over to the New World?"the portly man argued.


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She stepped further away from his looming presence.

"It's a death sentence, and nothing more than a cost cuttingmeasure!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" he growled.

"Unlike you, I can understand the newspapers very easily. I know itonly costs five pounds a head to send us to Canada on the coffinships, but twenty pounds in taxes according to the new governmentregulations. So Lord Devlin will save himself fifteen pounds pertenant, and gets the chance to fob the problem of Ireland's pooronto another government as well!"

His beady little eyes widened for a moment, but then he shook hishead. "Well, Miss High and Mighty, whatever way it adds up, theship sails noon Sunday from Dublin, so you'd better get your thingstogether and get moving."

"Sunday? But it takes three days to walk to Dublin from here! Andwe still have to pack for the journey!" Emer protested.

"It's your choice. Come live with me and save your family fromeviction, go on the ship, or starve on the roads here in Irelandlike the rest of you bloody Papists," Mr. Penny spat, as if thewords were distasteful to him.

'"Tis no matter to me, but you might like to consider your familybefore you turn up your fine nose at my offer." He stalked away

from the door of the cottage without a backward glance, leaving hernumbly staring after him.

She grabbed her black woollen shawl off the peg by the door andpaced outside her small cottage for a time, wondering why shesuddenly felt as though she couldn't breathe.

It simply couldn't be true, could it? If it were, what were theyall to do?

Though Emer had been scathing in her criticism of Mr. Penny and

Lord Devlin, she was well aware of the fact that she and her familywere the most fortunate people on the Kilbracken estate.Emer herself was governess to Lord Devlin's two small daughters,and as such not only received a free cottage, but clothes, food anda salary of twenty pounds a year.

Her elder brothers Cormac and Martin also did well compared to manyother Irish tenants, for they helped run the racehorse stables onthe estate, and were fine trainers and riders of champion hunters.


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Yet in spite of their relative prosperity, the potato famine whichhad raged throughout Ireland for the past two years, ever sincethat fateful day in October 1845 when the pratai had been taken outof the ground all over the country black and stinking, had causeduntold suffering throughout the beleaguered land.

Food had become scarce, prices had risen sharply, people hadpanicked, and many had already died or emigrated.

Emer had never imagined that her own family would be part of themassive evictions scheme she had read so much about, but now itseemed that even the estate where she had grown up had fallen onhard times.

Ever since the lady of the house had died in childbirth severalyears ago, Lord Devlin had fallen into dissolute ways, and thecorrupt Mr. Penny had helped speed up the estate's decline.

Emer gathered her shawl closely around her shoulders, unable tocontrol her shivering.

After a few more moments of pacing outside in the chill spring air,she knew she couldn't put off speaking to her family any longer.She hoped she seemed calm enough as she walked to the fourthcottage in the row, where, as she had predicted, the entire Nugentfamily had gathered to discuss the terrible news.

"I say we should stay in Ireland, find work somewhere!" her

youngest brother Cathan, at only twelve, shrieked to be heard. "Somany have been forced out of Ireland already, there are bound to bepeople looking for good horse trainers!"

"I agree with Cathan," Martin, Emer's second brother, and closestin age to her at twenty-two to her twenty, said quietly. His wifeNuala nodded also.

"Ireland is full of horse trainers, Brother, as well you know,"Cormac, the eldest, at twenty-three, said with a contemptuous snort.

"But Cormac, I don't want to leave our home! What about our girls,Ailbhe and Blinne? Can you imagine us having to travel half wayaround the world with them?" Cormac's wife Ailis protested.

"And what about the girls in our family?" their father Liam Nugentdemanded angrily. "Four girls, sixteen and younger, off to Canadato find work! What are they fit for except farm labour and a fewhousehold duties in the scullery of a big house?"


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"I can cook and sew as well, Da, we all can. Emer's taught us,"Brona sniffed, offended. "And as for being too young to look aftermyself, sure, weren't you and Mammy married at the same age I amnow?"

"No dear, we were a bit older than sixteen, but near enough," hermother Breda reminded them all.

"Can we stop the family gossip for a moment here, please!" Cormacroared as they all tried to talk at once.

All of them subsided into silence as they fixed their eyes on thepowerful figure, tall and blonde, blue-eyed, as handsome as a younggod, Emer had always thought admiringly.

But he was also far too fond of getting his own way, she reflected.What Fate did he wish to lead them all into?

Cormac stood in the centre of the room and looked from one to theother, making sure they were all listening to him.

"We must be calm, and practical. It's not the end of the world.Others before us have lost their homes. We have several days untilthe boat leaves. If we have to go to Dublin to board the ship,then I suggest that rather than waiting around until they smash thewalls and roofs down around all our ears, that the oldest of us allgo the city to look for work.

"If some of us do manage to find positions, then we can all think

about staying here in Ireland. If not, well, we will just have totake our chances and get on the Pegasus bound for Quebec," Cormacproposed.

The Nugents all looked from one to the other, and Emer was thefirst one to speak.

"I agree with Cormac. I'm not saying it will be easy, with so manyto feed in a big city, and needing a roof over our heads as well,but it's better than being forced to go on one of those dreadfulships I've heard about from the papers. I'll pack up my things and

be ready to leave at sunrise."

"I knew you would be game for anything, a thaisce," her father Liamsaid, using his pet name for her, 'my treasure.'"I'll go with Cormac and Emer. Who else will come?" Martin asked.

His wife Nuala offered, "If the younger girls or Cathan werewilling to look after the children, then Ailis and I could go withthe three of you looking for work. I'm sure I could find someone


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who wanted my embroidery and knitting and weaving skills, and noone makes finer gowns than Ailis."

"I'll look after your lads Oisin and Daig, Nuala, if Maeve willlook after Ailis' daughters," Cathan agreed.

"But I want to go with Emer. I'm thirteen, old enough to work at a

job cleaning or cooking somewhere!" Maeve protested.

"No, pet, you have to stay and help Da and Mammy get their thingstogether. It will be a much harder journey for them and will takelonger. You and Cathan should stay, and Roisin also, since she isthe next youngest. You'll all have to take turns carrying thingsand helping each other," Emer coaxed.

"Right, that's settled then," Cormac said with an air of finality."We shall all go tomorrow except the youngest and oldest, and we'llmeet up at the docks on Sunday at noon. Or, if we find work and

lodgings, we shall send a message to the others saying where we are."

"I don't like this. It's going to split up the family either wayif we all have to go into service," Cara, Emer's fifteen-year oldsister, complained.

"I know how you feel, dear, but is it better to be all together ina foreign land, or see each other only sometimes, but in our owncountry?" Cormac asked.

"I don't know. We've never been separated before. The Nugent

family has lived and died on this estate for generations, yetovernight it's being taken from us," Cara sighed as she turned backto her knitting.

"Now let's not be so pessimistic," their father Liam scolded. "Ithink we should try to stay in Ireland, find work in Dublin, or thelads can find jobs with the more horsey set over in England.

"But Cara is right. If it is going to cause undue hardship andsuffering, then I think we should seriously consider Canada as afresh start, all together as a family."

"I'm going to go over to see Garvan, Da, to tell him of ourdecision, and see what arrangements he and Oran are going to make,"Emer said quietly.

Her father smiled gently, and nodded. "Off you go then, Emer, andenjoy yourself, you two lovebirds."

Emer heaved a mighty sigh. "Hard to enjoy anything now that we're


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losing our homes, Da, but thanks all the same for the good wishes."

She left the house and started to walk up the path to the lastcottage in the row.

CHAPTER TWO

As Emer walked up to her fiance Garvan's cottage, she chewed herlower lip pensively, troubled by her father's last words, to enjoyherself, even with such a dire fate as emigration hanging overtheir heads.

Lovebirds, indeed. If only he knew...


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She sighed heavily again.

Her father and mother had such a perfect marriage. It seemedimpossible for them to understand that not every couple was as muchin love as they, or that her impetuous nature was rather hard tocurb at times. It had been that very nature which had got her into

the fix she was in now, with an engagement she neither wanted norfelt she deserved.

Emer had danced with Garvan many times at one of the recentdances,partly because she loved to dance, and partly to get even with thegirls in the village who had called her stuck-up, and had made funof her for never having been courted.

The gossips had made great sport of the whole affair, and beforeshe had known anything about it, Emer had been landed with a fiance

who, though a worthy man, had very little scintillatingconversation, education, or any shared interests with herself.

His brother Oran was slightly better, for at least he wasinterested in improving his ability to read, and joined in withEmer's family as she gave all the youngest ones lessons.

But the most that could be said for the Dillon brothers was thatthey were a pair of very stolid farm workers with few prospectsother than working for someone else tilling the soil for the restof their lives.

Still, as her father had said, the Dillon brothers were decent men,kind, gentle, tall, and handsome, and remarkably similar inappearance, with the same bright blue eyes. The only thing todistinguish them was their hair, for Garvan's was blond, whileOran's hair was dark brown.

"I'm glad you're here, Emer. What have your family decided to do?"Garvan said without preamble when she tapped on the door andentered the cottage.

"Those of us who are able and old enough are all leaving for Dublinin the morning to look for work. The old pair and the youngestchildren, with the babes, will be following on to meet us Sunday atthe docks if we have no success. But if we do find work and a newhome, we'll meet them at the docks to take them to our new place."

"In that case, since two of the carts are going up to Dublintomorrow to fetch some provisions, Sam the head driver says we canall go up together," Garvan informed her.


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Her eyes lit up. "If we won't have to walk the whole way, perhapswe should rethink our plans, and all go with Sam," Emer said,relieved at the prospect of a less arduous trip to the distantcapital.

"What do you think about going to Canada, Emer?" Oran asked,

looking at her expectantly, clearly interested in her opinions.

"I've heard dreadful thing about the condition of the ships. Eventhough Lord Devlin has paid our passage, that doesn't includeanything else. We will still have to feed and look after ourselveson a voyage that could last six to eight weeks, depending on theweather," Emer warned them.

"A good point," Garvan said quietly. "We're going to need food andprovisions as well, Oran."

"I'll count up how much ready money we have, but if the lands aregoing to be cleared anyway, we should take as much food and otheritems as we can with us to sell. Otherwise we will only have topay good money for it in the town," Oran advised, "and we all knowhow expensive cities can be."

"Right, in that case we had better stop standing around yarning,and get on with the job, " Emer stated, and with an assurance thatshe would see them later, she took her leave of the brothers.

Before she began her packing, however, she needed to go back to her

parent's house to tell them the good news about the carts.

"In that case, perhaps we should all go to town tomorrow," herfather said.

"Will we be ready by then?" his wife asked worriedly.

"It will cost money for lodgings," Brona cautioned.

"And what about all the food and animals and so on we will have toleave behind?" Cara asked querulously.

Emer considered this point carefully. Then she replied, "I have totalk to Lord Devlin about our wages anyway, so I'll see if he'd bewilling to give us a fair price for the pigs and poultry. I'll dothe best I can, but if we all intend on leaving tomorrow, we'dbetter get to work."

With that, she tidied her hair and dress, and headed up to the bighouse, where she paced anxiously in the white and black marble


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foyer of the neo-Cassical eighteenth-century mansion, her headspinning with the enormity of all that had happened, and all thatwould have to be done to leave the only home she had ever known.

After a half-hour wait, Emer was able to secure a brief audiencewith Lord Devlin, in which she explained her needs.

"You can always stay, my dear. My wife was always very fond ofyou, you know. You were the daughter we never had, until of courseour own little ones came along," the middle aged man saidsincerely, though his general demeanour was one of lassitudebrought on by too much drinking. "You've been an excellentgoverness, and we would be happy to keep you on as a part of thehousehold."

"But what about all the rest of my family, and the villagers? Itseems unfair to throw us all out, if it's possible for some of usto stay."

"I can't keep this place going. I haven't got the means," LordDevlin said wearily, throwing his hands wide in despair.

"Sell some of the land and the horses, then. You could still keepus all here working for you!"

"No, the taxes would cripple me in no time. I'm already poorenough as it is," Lord Devlin lamented with a melodramatic sigh.

Emer laughed contemptuously. "Poor! With this house, those

clothes! Why, the price of even one of those leather bound bookswould feed a family for a year!"

Lord Devlin sat up. "There's no need to be so rude, Emer Nugent!"

Emer, undaunted, saw her chance to voice her real opinions. "Rude,is it? You're sending us off to Canada to be rid of us, and I'msupposed to be grateful?

"I read the papers. Do you have any idea of the conditions on theships? The accommodation for steerage passengers is worse than

evenyour horses, mere animals, would have to endure, and the mortalityaboard the vessels is high.

"I'm sorry Lord Devlin, if I seem ill-mannered, but I merely speakthe truth. You know I'm grateful for everything you and your wifedid to get me an education and a position over the years, and mayGod grant that her soul rests in peace. I only hope when your timecomes that your soul will be able to as well. I hope you can live


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with yourself, signing as you have the death warrant of so many!"

"I'm sorry for all of you, really I am, but it's done now. I can'tchange my mind even if I wished to," Lord Devlin said in hishaughtiest manner. "So if you've come to lecture me...."

"No, I haven't, sir. I've come for my salary, plus the money for

my food and clothes and lodgings for the year that go with it. Andmy familys wages, plus a fair price for our livestock and poultryas well, since we shall be forced to leave all the animals behind,"Emer demanded with a proud lift of her chin.

Lord Devlin eyed Emer admiringly, but saw he would have littlechance of persuading her to change her mind and remain.

Quite an unsettling little filly, he thought to himself with ashake of the head.

"Here, fifty pounds, Missy, for all of you, and I wish you and yourfamily all the best, I really do. I shall be sorry to lose you,and your brothers," he added as an afterthought.

"And we're sorry to leave. We were all born here, and believed wewould all live here forever."

"Perhaps it's fate, destiny," Lord Devlin declared challengingly ashe rose from his chair. "I think a woman like you is wasted herein this sleepy little country backwater. Go out into the wideworld, Emer Nugent, and show everyone what you're made of," he said

with a polite bow over her hand, which he kissed softly beforeguiding her out the door and closing it firmly behind her.

Emer stared at the closed door for several moments in bemusement,before pocketing the small leather pouch he had given her. Then sheheaded to the back of the mansion to seek out the housekeeper andbutler.

"Well, we've been given notice to quit, Mrs. Reynolds, so I've cometo say goodbye and thank you for all your kindness."

"When does the ship leave?" the elderly housekeeper clad ia blackgown asked.

"Sunday, but we're off to Dublin on the carts with Sam tomorrow tosee if we can find some work so we don't have to go."

"Aye, and perhaps you can sell your tickets at the docks to peoplewho do want to emigrate," Mr. Reynolds suggested cleverly.


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Emer smiled and nodded. "That's an excellent suggestion. Wecertainly will try it. The master gave me fifty pounds for wagesand our pigs and hens, so I came to see if you could give me asmany small coins as you can manage in exchange. If you take out abig coin, people think you're rich."

"It may seem like a great deal of money now, but with your huge

family, it will go quickly," the butler said kindly, as his wifegot out two pillowcases and began to stuff them with food.

"I know it isn't much, but you're welcome to it," Mrs. Reynoldssaid as she put in several pies and cheeses.

"Really, you mustn't. You'll get into trouble!" Emer protested,wide-eyed.

"Nonsense, his lordship never looks at the books anymore,especially since he struck it lucky on the gambling recently.

Here, he gave me fifty pounds last week, but with him dismissingall the servants today, I won't be needing it. You take half," thehousekeeper offered.

Emer shook her head. "No, I couldn't."

"Trust me, you'll need it. Just promise me that if you're ever ina position to do a kindness for another fellow creature, you won'twalk away," Mr. Reynolds said soberly.Emer hugged him tightly. "Thank you, Mr. Reynolds, and God bless.

I promise. And I won't forget your kindness."

Emer hugged Mrs. Reynolds lingeringly, for the kind old woman hadbeen a good friend to her over the years.

Then Emer stopped off at her both her brothers' houses to tell themthe good news about the carts, before returning to her parent'shouse.

"I have seventy-five pounds here," Emer said, clinking down thecoins and notes onto the table with a flourish, before showing herfamily the two bags of food.

Her father Liam scowled. "We can't accept charity."

"It's not charity, Da, it's what we would be entitled to for therest of the week if we had stayed. Besides, Mr. Reynolds said wecould pay him back if we were to be kind to the needy in future,and I promised him I would."

"You're too soft-hearted, Emer, that's always been your trouble,"


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her brother Cormac complained.

"It's better than sitting around worrying about fancy clothes allday," Emer sniped, with a dig at Cormac's wife Ailis, whofortunately was out of the room.

"Emer, that was unworthy of you," her mother berated her.

"I'm sorry, Mam, it's just that Cormac is always so quick tocriticise me, yet he ignores his own wife's failings. If I wasn'tso kindhearted, you and Ailis would never have a square meal on thetable in your house, and Ailbhe and Blinne wouldn't be able to reador write, now would they?"

"You're right, Emer, I'm sorry," Cormac apologised. "I lack yourfirmness of character."

"Boldness, you mean," Cathan teased.

"That's the pot calling the kettle black, you little monster," Emerretorted, hugging her youngest sibling and ruffling his hair."Sure, doesn't your name mean 'battler!' You did nothing but tryto box your way out of Mam's belly for nine months, and you'vegrown even more pugnacious with every passing day."

"I've followed your example, you spirited young hussy," Cathanmocked, striding across the room with a long-legged gait inimitation of Emer's own walk.

The family all broke into fits of giggles, but Emer sobered quicklyenough. After all, there was much to be done.

"I'm going to start packing my things. Now remember, the ship willbe cold and damp with no proper beds if we have to go, so we willneed all the blankets. And if we do end up going to Canada, it'smeant to be a savage country in winter, much worse than Ireland, sotake all your woollens with you even though it is roasting at theminute."

Emer went back to the silence of her own cottage, and sat down with

a sigh. A million worries teemed in her brain, but the onlythought she could focus on was what Lord Devlin had said.

Maybe it was fate, destiny, which was sending her to Canada?

Emer, though frightened by the prospect of leaving Ireland, wasalso very curious to travel and see something of the world. Thoughit would be a tremendous upheaval to leave the land of her birth,many others had emigrated and made a fresh start in North America.


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Aye, but they were the lucky ones who had survived the passage, shereminded herself grimly. It was a long journey to Quebec, and onefraught with danger. Better to try to stay in Ireland if at allpossible, though secretly Emer held little hope of their chances,and even less confidence that they would be able to keep the wholefamily together the way they had always been.

Because of the potato famine and resultant hardships everyone wason the road heading to Dublin and Cork to look for work. Anyplaces available in the cities were probably long gone by now, andall of the wealthy estates for miles around each city would haveeither a full complement of workers, or would have had to tightentheir belts due to all the new government taxation, and dismissmost of their workers rather than bankrupt themselves.

Ireland was such a poor country compared with England, but thelawmakers in London knew nothing of their plight, and cared less.

No, if the Nugent family were going to save themselves, they weregoing to have to do it by the sweat of their brows, and with morethan their fair share of luck from the good Lord.

Emer rose from her chair decisively and rolled up the sleeves ofher brown cotton gown. Sitting there wouldn't get the work done.

And only tomorrow would tell what the future held for her and herfamily and friends. She would just have to do her best to dealhead-on with whatever Fate had in store for them.

CHAPTER THREE

The next morning, the entire assembly of Nugent, Dillon and Lynchfamilies piled the two carts high with their possessions, and waved

goodbye to their fellow villagers who had come to see them off.

"We'll see you at the ship on Sunday one way or the other!" Emercalled to their friends Marion Lacy and Aine Flanagan, and they setoff on their journey.

The children and Emer's parents all rode atop, while the fouryoungest girls took it in turns to walk. But when they came to anysteep hills they all had to get out, and even help push the cart on


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if it got bogged down.

At midday, Emer was plodding wearily up the last hill with Oisin,her young nephew on her back. Suddenly a whole vista spread outbefore her, and she could see the busy hive of activity that wasDublin.

"Where do you want to head for, Miss?" Sam asked as the cartarrived at the outskirts of the city.

"With all this luggage, I think we should go straight to the docksand inquire for the ship. Then we can at least leave the things inthe parcel office, and find lodgings."

"Right you are, Miss."

When Sam finally found the right docks, Emer and her brothersCormac and Martin left the family at the gates as they went to

search for their ship the Pegasus.

The harbormaster told them they would have to make arrangementswith the captain about the cargo directly, so Emer asked where theship was berthed.

"You're in luck, Miss. It just limped into port about a half anhour ago. Looks like they've had a rough crossing. Go speak to thecaptain, whose name is Jenkins, and then perhaps your family canleave all your things safely with them," the harbormaster saidkindly.

Cormac was reluctant to trouble the captain, since he was confidentthat they would all find work in Dublin and not have to go toCanada, but Martin agreed with Emer that they had far too manythings, and nowhere to stay as of yet.

"Sam has to go about his business and be back at Kilbracken beforenightfall. He can't hang about here all day, or follow us aroundas we go from place to place in search of work or lodgings," Martinsaid. "We need a safe place for all our things."

"Very well, let's go," Cormac said with a nod.

So the three of them headed in the direction the harbormasterindicated with his stubby forefinger, and strolled up the dockwhere the Pegasus floated majestically despite its tatteredappearance.

Emer had never been aboard a ship before, but undaunted, shewalked up the gangplank ahead of her brothers. Once on deck, she


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heard the captain loudly complaining, "What do you mean; I can'thave any more crew?"

The shipping agent said, "You know Mr. Randall's policy, Mr.Jenkins! We only hire Canadian crews, so they're much less likelyto jump ship in foreign waters. You'll have to make do with themen you have."

"But there's so much to do! We'll never be ready to leave bySunday," the captain's wife, a small, plump, dark-haired woman withmild eyes, made so bold as to say in small quavering voice.

"With all due respect, that's not my problem, ma'am. You sail ontime, and start turning a bigger profit on your voyages, or you'regoing to be out, mark my words. Just remember you have to answer toMr. Frederick Randall, and a more cantankerous and miserly oldweasel I've never met."

The shipping agent shook his head pityingly, and stalked past Emerand straight down the gangplank.

"How on earth shall we manage, dear? Ten men down, and both mycabin boys gone. Who is to do all the cooking and cleaning foreveryone?" Mrs. Jenkins complained sadly. "It's impossible."

Emer saw her opportunity, and seized it without hesitation."Captain Jenkins, if I may make so bold, I'm Emer Nugent, and theseare my brothers Cormac and Martin.

"We've just been cleared off our estates in Meath by our landlord,and are meant to be sailing with you to Quebec on Sunday. We tocame to Dublin early in the hope of finding work and a place tostay, so that perhaps we might not have to emigrate to Canada afterall.""Yes, yes, I'm pleased to meet you, and I'm sorry for yourtroubles, but I have a thousand things to do, and hardly any crew,"Captain Jenkins said impatiently.

"Listen to the girl, dear. I believe she's about to suggestsomething beneficial to both of us," Mrs. Jenkins said quietly,

taking her husband's arm.

Emer took a deep breath, and proposed boldly, "If you will allow usto stay on board this week, and go out at night to look forpermanent posts, my family and I will work for you during the day,doing whatever jobs you require.

"And if we do have to go to Canada after all, I am more thanwilling to act as a cabin boy, cooking cleaning and doing all the


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chores you require, as would my twelve year old brother Cathan."

Captain Jenkins's eyebrows lowered for moment as he thought aboutEmer's proposal. Then he asked, "How many men and women in yourparty?"

"Nine women, eleven men, plus four small children."

Captain Jenkins looked at his wife for approval, and she nodded."They could do the cleaning and so on, and get the ship in order, Isuppose," he thought aloud. "How old are the boys in your group?

"My brother is twelve, my brothers in law eighteen down tofourteen, and I am just turned twenty."

"A woman as a cabin boy. It's unthinkable," the captain mutteredgruffly.

"No it isn't, dear. The girl says she can cook, clean, and sew,and judging from the look of her, she has spirit. Take them all,"Mrs. Jenkins advised her spouse.

"All right," Captain Jenkins agreed reluctantly. "Bring yourthings aboard and leave them on the deck, Miss Nugent. My mate Mr.Bradley will show you all what needs to be done, and you can stayaboard until the ship sets sail. The wages won't be much, but youwill be fed and housed, so that should help your family a bit.

"You can go ashore at six every evening after supper has been

served, and try the houses and hotels to see if they will take anyof you on permanently. If they don't, then I'll take all of theyoung men in your party on as crew.

"You, girlie, and your young brother, can be cabin boys. You'llall get food, and the two cabin boys have their own berths up abovein the main gallery.

"The other men can go into the crew's quarters, but if you all wantto stay together, then you can bunk down below in the hold with theothers. You follow the rules, don't be cheeky, and we'll get along

fine," Captain Jenkins said gruffly.

"Thank you, Captain Jenkins, you won't regret this! My brotherMartin can go for the carts, and Cormac and I will start workstraight away." She shook his hand gratefully.

Captain Jenkins turned back to his work, and his wife gave agrateful smile and then went below.


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Thus Emer was left alone on deck with Cormac.

He immediately rounded on his sister. "Have you completely lostyour reason? We're meant to be going out looking for real work,not playing about on a ship!"

"This is real work, and what's more, now we all have a place to

stay without it costing us any money," Emer defended herself hotly."You heard the captain. We'll be housed and fed, and earn money aswell. And we can still go out to look for work.

"Plus, if we don't find any jobs here in Dublin, we can still go toCanada and be fed and paid throughout the entire journey. That willsave a great deal of money, and preserve that much more of our nestegg for when we get to Canada. I can't see what you're objectingto, Cormac!"

"We know nothing about ships. I'm a horsebreeder, for pity's sake.

This whole enterprise could turn out to be a disaster. And Idoubt Ailis and Nuala will be happy about the fact that you'vevolunteered their brothers as sailors. Come to that, I'm not surewhat Garvan and Oran will say either."

Emer crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Look, Cormac, I'm notgoing to waste time standing here arguing with you. The captainand his wife need our help, and we need money and a place to stay.We have no idea what tomorrow may bring, so just for now, let'sassume that the worst comes too the worst, and we have to go toCanada. Working on board ship is the best solution to all of our

problems."

"All right, I will speak to the others. I guess it can't do anyharm," Cormac conceded. "But I wish you wouldn't be so headstrongand wilful, Emer."

She rolled her eyes in exasperation. "For Heaven's sake, Cormac,you act as though I've committed a crime. I'm just trying to dowhat is best for everyone, don't you see?

"I saw the opportunity and I took it. No one has been harmed by

this. In fact, the captain and his wife are very grateful for mysuggestion. It gets them out of trouble as well. You heard theshipping agent as well as I did. They'd have hardly any crewwithout us here. They're not allowed to hire anyone other thanCanadians, and it would be positively dangerous to try to cross the

Atlantic with so few crew. We'll be helping not only ourselves, buteveryone aboard ship, making it safe for us all."

"But we're farmers, not sailors, and you're a governess."


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"Beggars can't be choosers."

"You jumped right in without thinking of the consequences, just theway you always do! You always let your heart rule your head!" hefired back.

"I do think of the consequences!" Emer retorted. "But I have toface facts and deal with our situation as it is here and now, notworry about a thousand things that might or might not happen."

She began to stride down the gangplank, her skirts and petticoatsflying in every direction. "Now, we've done enough quarrelling forone day, Cormac. Come on, let's get our things up on deck, and gofind the mate," Emer concluded firmly.

"She's like a ship in full sail," Captain Jenkins commentedthoughtfully to his wife as they watched Emer from the poop deck.

"She has spirit, that one. I think she will bring us good luck,"his superstitious wife replied.

"Well, you've obviously taken a fancy to our new cabin boy, so whoam I to disagree with your instincts. They've never been wrongyet. But don't get too fond of Emer. The family might not even bestaying on until Canada, you know.""I have a feeling they will," Mrs. Jenkins answered cryptically."After all, fate brought her to us at the precise moment we neededher help, her and her family's."

She glided quietly across the deck as she watched Emer struggle tocarry up several bundles of clothes all at once. "Yes, my dear, Ithink this was meant to be. She'll do just fine."


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CHAPTER FOUR

True to Mrs. Jenkins's predictions, Emer and her family were notable to find any jobs in Dublin which suited them and allowed themto stay together. Either it was a maid's job for the girls, inwhich case they would have to live in at the house or hotel, or a

job out in the country, working on the land, where they werewilling to take one or two workers, but not an entire clan of twodozen souls.

But Emer did not despair, for life aboard the Pegasus seemed to be

full of exciting possibilities, and the family never had time tobrood as the week flew past.

They all had to scrub the ship from top to bottom after the lastrough voyage, and prepare the hold for the two hundred and fiftypassengers who were expected to board on Sunday.

From the County Meath estate owned by Lord Devlin there were onehundred and eighty people, and the rest of the ship had been filled


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with various families able to pay their own passage, or who hadbeen offered the choice of staying to starve in their homeland, oremigrating at the expense of their landlords.

Wherever they had come from, they all had to be provided for, andnearly the whole or Emer's extended family, apart from the youngchildren, quickly settled in and got to work.

Their first tasks were to scrub the ship from top to bottom, andto clear out the largest cargo hold, normally used only for timber,and install wooden beds for the expected passengers.

They had to put up wooden walls at six-foot intervals from thefront to the back of the ship, and then put four brackets on eachside of the walls. Planks of wood were slotted into the bracketshorizontally, before four guard-rails were hammered along the fulllength of either side of the ship.

The result of their efforts were rows of bunks, with three roughbeds from top to bottom in each section, with a storage shelf atthe top, as well as more storage under the lower bunk. The railswould prevent everything from being cast onto the floor in theevent of rough weather.

Each bed was designed to hold two people, though they wouldn't bothbe able to lie flat at the same time, the planks were so narrow.

The men did all the heavy lifting and carrying, while the youngerlads and girls all helped hammer the brackets and guard rails into

place.

Once they had finished with that chore, at the end of fifth day,Emer's mother Breda suggested they start making arrangements incase they had to stay on the ship all the way to Canada.

Breda decided that the forepeak of the ship would be best for them,since there was more room in front for storage, and more privacy.It was also some distance away from the large hatch which led tothe decks above, and the ladder below to the main cargo hold fullof stores and ballast. It would be warmer and drier in the event of

a storm, and also out of the way of people walking up and down inthe confined space.

Her husband Liam took the hammer and some hooks, and drove theminto the boards in the ceiling. Then they hung sheets between eachsection, and divided each section in half, so they would have a bitmore privacy to get washed and dressed and so on.

In spite of the children's protests, the four toddlers were


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allocated the bunks at the bottom, as were Liam and Breda, and Mr.and Mrs. Lynch, and Ailis and Nuala's parents. They all labouredto store their most important items above and below, and once theyhad crammed in whatever they could, Emer and Cathan took the restof their things up to their own cabin boy's quarters.

The cabin boy's bunks were opposite each other on either side of

the large cabin at the stern of the ship. They had simple slidingdoors, but also a high bunk, a porthole apiece, and many shelvesand drawers below the beds for storage. Emer was delighted withher snug but well-organized quarters, and packed her shelves withthe provisions her family had brought aboard.

She put all their surplus clothing and other personal effects onCathan's shelves and in his drawers. They even had their ownchamber pots, and now Emer wondered with a pang what theothers were going to do below decks regarding appropriate sanitaryfacilities, especially once the Pegasus got underway. It had been

primitive enough with just her family on board in port, let alone withhundreds of strangers sailing on a storm-tossed sea for the nextfew weeks.

Emer surveyed the ship with a whole new eye now. Next she scoutedaround the ship until she found some flat pieces of wood and gavethem to her brothers to saw holes in, and then located somebuckets. They rigged up a makeshift privy at either end of thelarge cabin, which they partitioned off with some spare largeplanks of wood, and nailed the seats into place.

Emer's mother was pleased with their arrangements, though whenGarvan and Oran saw they might have to share the area with fourunmarried young ladies, they shyly opted to sleep in the crew'squarters for the rest of the journey.

With the four boys' and Cathan and Emer's bunks now empty, Cormacand Martin went out to buy more provisions, and stuffed the emptybunks with the provisions they would need for the journey.

"Some of the lads were telling me today that sometimes if we getdelayed by storms at sea, we might run out of food. I've gone to

get some more cheeses, and some eggs, which we can eat hard-boiled,and a cask of brandy and one of wine," Cormac indicated to hisfamily.

"We should get some fresh water as well, just in case," Emersuggested.

Martin shook his head. "We'll get that as part of the ship's


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stores."

"Yes, but for cooking down here or washing, or whatever, it wouldbe better to have access to our own supply, especially with allthese women here, and Ailis getting near her time," Emer arguedsensibly.

The men blushed, but did as she had suggested, and went to buyseveral casks of fresh water as well.

Though her elder brothers still clung to the hope that they wouldbe able to find a job at a stable somewhere, Emer herself was notso unhappy at the prospect of going to Canada, for her new life asa cabin boy was very exciting in many ways.

She helped with the captain's and his wife's stores, cooked,cleaned, scrubbed, mended sails, and even, after the first fewdays, got to climb up into the rigging.

Much to her parent's horror, she borrowed one of Martin's shirtsand waistcoats, and a pair of Cathan' trousers. Tying her lushburgundy hair up into a long plait which she concealed under a seacap, she looked the picture of a fresh-faced young seafaring lad.

Her brother Cathan also enjoyed himself immensely even though theywere rushed off their feet most of the day.

Despite their inexperience, the rest of the crew was very kind tothe unusual family who had come aboard. The girls loved being

flirted with, and Ailis and Nuala were delighted with the manypairs of weather-roughened hands willing to cuddle their childrenwhen they grew fractious or began to cry.

The women's sewing skills and nimble fingers soon made thempopularwith every man aboard, as they moved from sail repairs and making,onto fixing and splicing the ropes, and then onto repairing thesailors' personal items of clothing, or making them new shirts.

For all these tasks they were paid good money, and all the

families' wages went into the common purse for the three families,which Cormac and his father counted every day.

On Saturday morning they all accepted in inevitable, that they weregoing to Canada the following day with the rest of the crew andfamilies from Kilbracken.

Old Liam and Cormac counted their money three times just to makesure.


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"There's nearly a hundred pounds here, in spite of all we've boughtfor the journey," Liam marveled. "It was a lucky day when yoursister came to this ship. It will be a tidy sum to make a start onin Canada."

"We have to get there first," Cormac reminded his father, his

expression grim.

"I know that, son, but there's no need to be so pessimistic all thetime. We're a lot better off than many of the poor souls inIreland. Perhaps it's for the best. We can make a whole new startin Canada or America, with more freedom than we've ever had here.You wouldn't want your girls to grow up with all the handicaps thatbeing a Catholic entails in Ireland, now would you?"

"I think girls nowadays have a bit too much freedom." Cormacscowled darkly as Emer came tripping down the stairs of the

companionway into the hold. "Look at her, like a young hoyden withno maidenly modesty."

"Aye, and I suppose I would be really modest if I climbed therigging in my skirts now. Then I'd really put on a fine show forall to see," Emer jeered.

"Da, tell her," Cormac insisted.

"I can't see the harm, son," their father replied mildly. "The crewon this ship treat her well, and the captain's wife has taken a

shine to her. You worry about your own wife's shortcomings, andleave Emer alone. I don't suppose Mrs. Jenkins has got a cookerybook around here anywhere, has she?" Liam asked his daughterhopefully, and then winked.

"Well, if she does, I'll be sure to ask if I can borrow it forCormac, else he'll fade away to a thread. I'll be pretty busyaround the ship, and doubt I'll have time to do my usual kitchendrudgery for you, Brother."

"In that case, I think I'll dine with the rest of the crew in their

mess," Cormac said as he visibly changed colour, and left quickly.

Emer and her father laughed heartily. He patted his daughter onthe shoulder. "Never you mind him. He's just envious of yourbeauty and brains, and the fact that no matter what, you have aknack for landing on your feet just like a cat."

"Well, let's hope this journey doesn't have me landing flat on my..."


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"Emer!" her father chided gently, and then chuckled. "You make surehanging around with sailors doesn't lower the tone of yourconversation, and you will look after Cathan and the other boys upabove, won't you?"

"I will, Da, and I'll come down and visit as often as I can. I'dbetter go now. We're loading the ships stores' and ballast this

afternoon, and they'll need all hands on deck."

"And we'll have to help store it all below," Liam replied.

They both climbed the narrow stairs together, and up into thebright sunshine.

Emer looked up and admired the ship for the hundredth time, stillfinding it hard to imagine that she was about to set sail forCanada in only a few hours' time.

The Pegasus was a fine schooner, with three masts and a bowspritprotruding from the front. Emer knew there were twelve sails onthe masts, and couldn't wait to see them all unfurled when theyfinally got underway.

She and her father came up the companionway in between the mainmast and the capstan.

Captain Jenkins called to Liam, "Call down below to the others.Tell them to open up the lower hatch and then you can all make achain to move the cargo along. That way we can get loaded much

morequickly."

"Aye, Captain." Liam waved, and called below to his sons, while Emerstrode up the remaining stairs and on to the deck.

Emer worked on ceaselessly, scurrying around on her bare feet asshe went up and down the gangplank carrying crates, and helping herbrother and brothers-in-law to roll the many barrels. She hadworried at first about splinters, but the crew had warned her thatshoes and boots could be far more dangerous on the deck of a

rolling ship.

Emer enjoyed the feel of the sun on her face, and the crisp salttang she breathed in, though admittedly there were other lesspleasant smells wafting along the docks as the sun ascended high inthe sky, and the temperature rocketed.

At about three o'clock, as Emer continued to lug her cargo aboard,she noticed a huge commotion on one of the docks nearby. It seemed


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as though half of Dublin were trying to board the ship, and Emercouldn't take her eyes away from the teeming masses as people weredragged aboard by their arms, necks, and even legs and feet.

Women were jostled in the throng, and children screamed loudly asthey were either crushed, elbowed, or trodden upon in the mob'sfrenzy to get aboard.

"All headed off on the Arcadia for Philadelphia," Charlie, one ofthe younger sailors, informed Emer when he saw her staring.

"Is that what it's going to be like here tomorrow?" Emer asked,wide-eyed.

He shook his head. "No, because Captain Jenkins runs a tight ship.He lets the women and children on first, the men after, and onlyten people at a time. We'll start boarding them early tomorrowmorning, so get all your chores done in the galley early.

"Oh, and we have one passenger coming aboard, a Mr. Randolph, soprepare the best cabin for him, the largest one adjoining thegallery."

Emer nodded, and finally managed to drag her eyes away from thepitiful spectacle of the desperate souls trying to board the shipbound for the States. They looked ragged, starved, and terrified.

What would her own friends from Kilbracken look like when they hadto board? And what of the other passengers, strangers fromgoodness only knew where?

"Come on, Emer, pick up that end, there's a good fellow," herbrother-in-law Tomas, a thin pale boy of fourteen, demandedpetulantly.

"Sorry, sorry, I'm coming," Emer apologized as she hurried over tolift the crate, her back and legs straining as they carried it fromthe top of the gangplank over to the companionway stairs.

The other three Lynch brothers, Reamann, Peadar and Ultan, alwayslisted in that order starting with the eldest, lined the top of the

steep stairs. Each handed the box down to the next person as itdisappeared deep into the bowels of the ship.

"I say, Emer, this is going to be some adventure, isn't it,"Reamann said with a grin, and then gave Emer a flirtatious wink andtried to kiss her.

"Reamann, really, what will the captain say if he catches youfooling with his cabin boy! Besides, I'm engaged, and far too old


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for you anyway," Emer scolded good-naturedly.

"Two years between us isn't so much!"

"Why don't you talk to Brona or Cara? They're more your age!"

"Oh, Brona is far too serious and stuck up. All she wants is to be

a farmer's wife! And Cara hasn't got your fiery locks!"

"Fiery locks, fiery temper, Reamann! Be careful you don't getburnt," Emer returned glibly, and left the young man thoughtfullygazing after her, until her sister Cara, with her lovely long maneof blonde curls and cornflower blue eyes, came into view.

Perhaps Emer has a point, Reamann admitted as he saw Cara strollalong the deck with a pile of sewing for the men.His three brothers began to tease him as Reamann continued to starewith his mouth open. He looked at them one by one and retorted,

"Well, there's no harm in looking, is there?"

"No, but if you want to keep your job, you'd better get on withyour work!" Ultan scolded.

"The captain and crew like me already," Reamann boasted. "They sayI'm a natural born sailor, and could earn a fortune on some of thewhaling ships out of America."

Peadar frowned. "Mother and Father won't like to hear you talkinglike that! They have their hearts set on a little farm somewhere

near Quebec."

"I'm eighteen, old enough to make up my own mind, and old enough tomarry as well if I like. Sure, and don't the old pair have youother three fine strapping sons to look after them in their oldage," Reamann pointed out as he laboured on.

"All the same, once this tub gets going, you might find you hateit. I hear the seasickness is terrible," Ultan cautioned.

Emer returned just in time to overhear their last snippet of

conversation. "The steward Mr. Bradley says drinking chocolate isthe best thing for that," she revealed sagely, with a solemnexpression on her lovely face.

"Why, does it stop the seasickness?" Reamann asked hopefully.

"No, but it's the only thing that tastes as good coming up as itdoes going down!" Emer repeated the witticism she had heard for theboys, and broke into peals of laughter as she saw the four faces


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drop simultaneously.

They began to laugh, then choked as their eyes widened.

"Uh, oh, we're in trouble now!" Reamann groaned under his breath.

Emer's heart sank as she suddenly heard a heavy footfall behind her.

CHAPTER FIVE

Emer's back stiffened as she suddenly became aware of a loomingpresence behind her, and someone clearing his throat loudly as heattempted to stifle his own laughter.

Emer turned to face him, and saw the most incredible man she hadever laid eyes on standing before her. Though Emer knew sheherself was tall for a woman, this gentleman positively dwarfedher, with each of his hands big enough to fit both of her own intheir palms.

He was richly clad in a thick light-blue linen summer coat and afine travelling cape. His immaculate white shirt, embroideredroyal blue waist coat with a matching silk cravat, and skin-tightfawn-coloured breeches, all evinced that he could patronize the

finest tailoring establishments in Dublin, if not the world.

But even more impressive than his ensemble was his face, for Emerwas certain he was a god come straight down from the heavens,perfection itself. She tried to look for a flaw as she scrutinisedhis visage, completely enthralled.

His thick black hair, short and wavy on the sides, without anypomander to straighten it, fell to just above his shoulders, and


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was so dark as to be almost blue. His fine black brows arched overpale brown eyes, the colour of gold, which seemed to take ineverything with a penetrating stare. His nose was long andwell-boned, his chin finely-moulded, with a deep cleft. Hissideburns were neatly trimmed and quite short compared to thefashion of the period. His skin was a deep brown, and his strong

jaw was cleanly-shaven. His skin looks as soft as silk, Emer

marveled to herself.

"I'll have to remember that sage piece of advice for futurereference."

The stranger smiled, though his merriment failed to touch his eyes,which maintained their hard and assessing expression.

"My name is Dalton Randolph, and I'm to be one of your passengerstomorrow to Quebec. I was just shopping in town today, and since Iwas near the docks anyway, I thought I might as well bring my

things straight here rather than take them back to my hotel. IsCaptain Jenkins aboard, so that I may ask his permission to stowthem in my cabin?"

"He's away at the minute negotiating for supplies, but you'reexpected, sir, and so I'm sure he would have no objections. Showme where you've left your things, and we'll take them on board withall the other cargo," Emer offered, and signalled to Ultan andTomas to follow her.

"You're Irish," Dalton Randolph said abruptly.

"You're not deaf," Emer quipped.

"Humph." Dalton scowled. "Pretty saucy young lad, aren't you."

"I'm sorry, sir, but I don't see what I or my brothers being Irishhas to do with our loading your cargo, unless of course yousubscribe to the notion, popular in the English press, that we're abunch of idle, thieving vagabonds," Emer accused.

"No, no, I- it's just, it was just something to say by way ofconversation. I'm sorry," Dalton muttered.

"Well, I suppose me and the lads will forgive you, since mostgentry wouldn't usually take the trouble to converse with meresailors."

Emer grinned then, and strode down the gangway in front of Daltonas he paused in astonishment.

Ultan and Tomas followed her, and Dalton was left to make his way


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down to the dock alone.

"This cart over here," he indicated.

"Right, then, we'll look after these things, and we shall see youtomorrow, sir, with the rest of your luggage."

She and the two boys unloaded the cart quickly and allowed it todrive away.

Dalton got into his carriage, and jotted down his first notesconcerning his assignment: "Captain not on board upon firstarrival. Is hiring Irish crews, though strictly forbidden."

He put his top hat squarely back on his head, and thumped the roofof the carriage impatiently for the man to drive on.

Once the handsome Dalton Randolph had departed, Emer felt she

couldbreathe again, and she and her two comrades brought all the cargoon board safely.

He certainly was a handsome chap, fairly wealthy too judging fromall the fancy goods he had left for them to bring aboard. She hadseen food and clothing like it at Kilbracken in their better daysbefore the famine had struck. She just hoped Canadians weren'tquite as arrogant as the British. Though the less she had to dowith the huge, spectacular-looking passenger, the better, shedecided with a distinct shiver despite the heat of the day.

Then Emer went down the companionway nearest the mizzen-mast,whichgave access to the captain's quarters and the main saloon andgallery which were at the stern of the ship.

Emer stripped her waistcoat and sea cap off, and placed them in herown quarters, before walking halfway down the gallery, and goingthrough the door to her left.

Behind the door was a small passage, with a ladder up to the next

level where the captain's quarters and great cabin were situated.Another door led to the main passengers' stateroom. It was a long,fairly narrow chamber, with a large double bunk underneath a row ofthree portholes, and a dresser.

There was storage space under the bed and in the other threecorners of the room. A second door led out into the large open areaof deck below the open quarterdeck deck, where there was a largefireplace for cooking and keeping warm.


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The good-quality passengers would normally have this area reservedfor their recreation, but since it was going to be so crowded onthe ship, the captain had designated that midships was to be usedby the steerage passengers instead.

Mr. Randolph would be allowed to have the gallery all to himself

instead, and was to dine with the captain in his own quarters withhis wife for every meal.

Emer turned the key in the lock of the far door that opened outonto the deck amidships, and the boys began to bring DaltonRandolph's supplies into the stateroom. They piled them neatly inthe lockers nearest the door. Emer got fresh linen out of one ofthe drawers under the bed, and began to make the bunk.

Next she moved over to the small water closet across from the bed,where she laid out fresh towels and soap. She would come back to

fill the ewers full of water in the morning.

"It's so exciting, Emer. We're really going to Canada," Tomaswhispered, as he looked around at the cabin.

She nodded solemnly, struck by the enormity of it all. "I can'tbelieve it myself. One short week ago, we were all happy at homein Kilbracken, and now here we are about to cross the Atlantic."

"I know Ailis and Nuala have been really angry with you forsuggesting we become the ship's crew, but me and the lads love it,

honestly. Even Garvan and Oran are beginning to get the hang ofthings. It isn't the same as being on a farm, but you still need alot of muscle," Ultan said, as he flexed his own small bicepsproudly.

"Your sisters have never approved much of me anyway, so no offencetaken. I just hope we can all travel across the seas for six weekswithout scratching each others' eyes out," Emer commented wryly."I would be more worried about how your parents feel about all this."

"Dazed would be the best way to describe it," Ultan admitted after

a great deal of thought. "But they're a lot older than yourparents, so I think it's harder for them to accept that things haveto change.

"Father lends a hand, and all four of them have been put in chargeof belowdecks by the captain to ensure that the steerage area iskept clean at all times. But when he isn't working, Far just sitsand stares into space, and Brona told me that me Mar cries allnight."


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"It's a big wrench for them, having to leave their home. But then,it has been for all of us. We just have to make the best of it,and remind ourselves that we're a lot better off than those poorwretches we saw earlier today. Suffering and deprivation haveturned them into animals," Emer sighed.

"I don't understand why any of us have to leave," Tomas piped upwith his usual precocity. "I've looked around the docks here, andall I see are boatloads of food, oats, wheat and such like, beingshipped to other countries. I know that the potatoes have failed,Emer, but if there's other food available, why send it all away toother countries where there is no famine when everyone here isstarving?"

Emer brought the boys into the saloon to show them her quarters andCathan's, and they all sat down on the bunk as she pulled on herwaistcoat. She tried to get all her unruly hair back under her sea

cap again as she tried to explain the complex situation to herbrothers-in-law.

"It's the English government's policy, I'm afraid. They don'tthink that they should interfere with what they see as anexclusively Irish problem.

"They also believe in what they call free trade, so that themerchants can get good profits from buying and selling, and stay inbusiness and employ others to work for them, so that in turn thosepeople can eat.

"The government believes that if we didn't send food out by way oftrade, we wouldn't be able to import, to bring any food and othergoods into Ireland, because countries like America and Canadawouldn't think we were prosperous enough to be worth trading with.

"So the men in charge believe they should keep sending the foodout, since they say the amounts are so small compared to theoverall production in the country, that it wouldn't make adifference to the people anyway," Emer highlighted for them.

"Is what they think true, though?"

She shook her head and sighed. "I'm afraid not, Tomas. Thousandsstarved last winter because of the usual seasonal scarcity of food,you know, as the harvest supplies begin to dwindle. And matterswere made even worse by the total failure of the potato crop.

"Even if we do have a good crop this winter, many more will diebecause of the high prices, and so many being evicted from the


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land. It's only the end of May now, and a long way to October,when the potatoes will be harvested. They could come out of theground looking fine as they did two years ago, and still end uprotting in the stores once again."

They all shivered at this dreadful thought.

"Will Ireland have a good crop this year, do you think, Emer?"Ultan asked despondently.

Emer shrugged. "Who can say? But I really don't think so, andthat's why I want to go to Canada, before things get any worse."

"The blight can't last forever," Tomas pointed out.

"Aye, I know that, but where do you get potato seeds from to plantmore? From potatoes. There aren't any decent lumper potatoes tobe had after two years of famine, so the people would all have had

to buy seed this past spring. The price for seed will be veryhigh, and people already living on scraps for the past two yearswon't be able to afford them."Even if they did have seed, so many have been evicted, they mighthave no land to farm any more. Look at all the wandering folk wesaw on the road on our way here to Dublin. All the homeless livingin the streets and alleys of the capital. They've come from allover the country to look for work and a place to live. If theydon't work or grow food, they won't eat. Dublin is their last hope,as it was for us, and we found nothing. We could try to look harderand further. We could try to sell our billets and stick it out. But

how long would the money last, and where would we all live?

"I don't want us to be among them, so that's why I'm glad we'regoing to Quebec. We have a place to live, work to do, food threetimes a day which we can share with our families, and best of all,nearly every one of us have wages coming in. It may not be exactlywhat we're used to, but it's better than anything we could havehoped for in Dublin."

The boys all nodded.

"I didn't like saying this in front of the rest of the family, butthe truth is, I'm certain the situation in Ireland is going to geta lot worse before it gets better. So no matter how hard this

journey is going to be, it really is best if we all leave now whilewe can."

A sudden noise in the saloon caught her attention, and Emersilenced the boys with a quick movement of her hand as she stood upand walked out into the main salon.


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Just to the left of her sliding door stood Dalton Randolph, so tallthat he had to stoop even in the large spacious gallery.

"I'm sorry to interrupt your fascinating conversation," he saidsomewhat gruffly, "but I had a few more things to bring aboard,and...."

"Please, don't apologise, Mr. Randolph. The lads and I justfinished your room, so if you'd like to have a look around and seeif there's anything else you require, I'll take you there," Emersaid politely.

She tried to avoid the golden gaze which seemed to penetrate to thevery depths of her soul.

"That would be most helpful, my boy." With a sweeping gesture withone arm, he indicated that she should lead the way.

"This is it, sir," Emer declared as she pushed open the doornearest the ladder. "We've put all your food stores in thoselockers by the door, but there's still some room in this one."

He began to reach for what he thought was a cupboard."No, sir, that's the water closet," she corrected him hastily.

Emer blushed as Dalton took a quick glance in, and then shut thedoor again tightly.

He opened all three portholes to air the room, and then looked intothe drawers underneath the bunk, and on the far wall.

"Very fine. It seems most satisfactory," Dalton said withoutenthusiasm.

Emer dared to meet his golden gaze with her own aqua one. "Ifthere is anything you wish, you have only to ask. I'm to be yourcabin boy. My name is Emer, and the steward is Mr. Bradley."

"No, there's nothing wrong with the room," Dalton said impatiently.

"Would you like to see the captain or his wife then, sir? Or haveI caused you some offence?" Emer asked boldly as he continued tostare at her, his lips compressed into a thin line which revealedhis ill-humour.

"Boys, go up to the top of the companionway, and fetch down myboxes please, which you can put in this locker. I want to have alittle talk with your brother here for a moment," Dalton ordered


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suddenly.

Then he pulled off his travelling cloak and gloves, and sat on thebunk to test it.

Dalton scowled darkly. "In answer to your question, Emer, no, youhave not cause me offence personally. But I would not have you

filling your brothers' heads full of wild talk, and doom and gloom."

She blinked at him in confusion. "Pardon?"

"How can you presume to understand the complicated questions ofgovernment and economy, or predict the future of the potato crop?It seems to me you're in possession of very few facts, and evenless understanding. You have no idea how harmful your idle chattercan be to rebellious men just waiting for a chance to attack theirbetters."

Emer could feel her temper begin to soar, but at the same time sheknew this man was a foreigner, a Canadian, and a paying customer onboard the ship, while she was a mere cabin boy.

She couldn't tell him exactly what she thought of his arrogance,but she was not going to allow his scathing criticism of herknowledge and ideas to go completely unchallenged.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Randolph, if you disagree with me, but I alwaysread the papers, follow the Parliamentary debates, and...."

His brows shot up in surprise. "You can read?"

"I went to school sir, aye. My whole family can read. I've taughtnearly all of them, and my nieces and nephews as well."

"Come from a big family, do you, boy?" Dalton asked, though withoutinterest.

"My family, including my four brothers-in-law, whom you've met,plus two other distant cousins, the Dillons, makes twenty four inall on board this ship. If you take away the four parents, I've

taught all the others how to read," Emer said proudly.

Dalton looked up as he worked out the figure of twenty, and thencontinued to stare at her silently.

Finally she grew uncomfortable under Dalton's sharp scrutiny andlowered her own aqua eyes.

"You're the gentleman, you know best," she said stiffly. "I'll keep


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my mouth shut, and my opinions to myself.

"Now, if you'd like to see the captain, we can go to his cabin tomake inquiries. It's just up this companion ladder outside yourdoor here," Emer indicated.

She left Dalton alone in the cabin to follow on behind.

On the deck above, Mrs. Jenkins was completely flustered by thelast-minute preparations.

"Emer, thank God you're here! Just look at what the captain hasbrought me!" she declared in a frightened voice, pointing to thepoop deck one level higher.

Emer popped her head through the hatch which led to the upper deck.

She was confronted by a long sharp pair of horns and a fearsome

pair of slanting yellow eyes. The horns took a sudden swipe at her.

Emer jumped back just in time to dodge the charge, but fell downthe ladder and landed on her posterior right at Dalton's feet.

"Are you all right, lad?" Dalton asked with concern; as he bentdown to offer her a hand up.

"Fine," Emer wheezed, as she clutched her chest with her other handand tried to get her wind back.

"I'm fine, really!" she insisted, alarmed, as Dalton began tocheck her legs for sprains. "I just got a shock, that's all."

"No, don't go up there!" she cried, clinging to Dalton's enormoushand with her own tiny one. "It's a goat!"

"For milk for the tea and so on," Mrs. Jenkins explained in ahushed voice.

They heard it stamping its hooves on the deck overhead. It wasevidently a most willful beast.

"Don't worry, Mrs. Jenkins, I've dealt with goats on the farm inthe past. I'll get it tied up and milk it for you every day," Emerreassured her hoarsely.

"Now, if I can introduce you to each other, Mrs. Jenkins, this isMr. Randolph, our passenger down below, who has begun loadingsomeof his things in his stateroom.


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"Mr. Dalton Randolph, may I present Mrs. Emily Jenkins, thecaptain's wife. Is there any sign of the captain while Mr. Randolphis here, Mrs. Jenkins? He was rather hoping to get a chance to payhis respects," Emer asked, as the two shook hands cordially.

"No, Emer, Mr. Randolph, I'm sorry. He's having a terrible time

securing food for the crew of any decent quality for a reasonableprice. He's had to go ashore again, and the good Lord only knowshow we'll be able to leave on time tomorrow," Mrs. Jenkins fretted,chewing her bottom lip.

Emer smiled in an effort to cheer the worried woman. "Never fear,Mrs. Jenkins, we'll get it all done, even if we have to work thewhole night."

Mrs. Jenkins smiled as she patted Emer's cheek. "You are a Godsend,child."

"In that case, ma'am, I shall defer the pleasure of meeting yourhusband until tomorrow. I apologize for taking up so much of yourvaluable time," Dalton said with a stiff bow.

Emer escorted him out of the captain's cabin and onto thequarterdeck.

"I hope your trip back here hasn't been an entirely wasted errand,"Emer remarked as she led the taciturn Mr. Randolph to the maingangway.

"No, not at all," Dalton replied with another stiff bow.

Without a word of farewell he stalked down the gangway and straighttowards his carriage.

"Now there is one careworn man," Reamann remarked as he and hisother brother moved to join Tomas, Ultan and Emer on deck as theyfinished putting Dalton Randolph's things down below.

"What makes you say that?" Emer asked curiously.

"Just look at the way he stares at everything, as though he isdetermining the value of it, and walks like he has the weight ofthe world on his shoulders," Reamann observed as they all staredafter Dalton's retreating figure.

"We can't all be as happy and as carefree as you, you know," Ultanteased.

"Aye, but all the same, he looks miserable for all he must have


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scads of money. Ach, who know, maybe a marvellous sea voyage willcheer him up no end!"

"Stranger things have happened," Emer murmured to herself as shewatched the carriage drive away into the red gleam of the sunset.

Shaking her head, she pulled her sea cap off to wipe the

perspiration off her brow and ruffled her damp hair.

Then she twisted her braid around the crown of her head once again,and pulled the cap back on tightly to try to prevent her luxuriousburgundy tresses from slipping down her back and getting in the wayof her work all the time.

"Come on, we have to give the deck one more sanding and scrubbingtonight, so let's move," Emer chivvied her companions.

She paused for a moment to watch the glorious sunset, the last one

she would ever see in Ireland. She breathed in the sea air like atonic, and listened for a moment to the whistling of the wind inthe rigging.

Then she went back to her never-ending round of chores, her spiritshigh as she looked forward to setting sail on the morrow.


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CHAPTER SIX

True to Emer's predictions, the crew did indeed labour the whole

night ensuring that all the maintenance jobs aboard the ship werecarried out, and that the repaired sails were all in place.

Emer loved climbing aloft, for it afforded an excellent view of theskyline of the city, but Tomas in particular was quite terrified ofheights, a problem that the crew tried to help him get over byordering him up on the least excuse. If he was that scared whenthey were in harbour, he would be no use at all on the high seas.

Emer would often volunteer to take his place, but her overtureswere usually rejected. The first mate and bo'sun could see that she

was only trying to protect the boy, but her taking on his choresmight not be the best thing for either of them.

She was supposed to be the cabin boy, and he a full member of thecrew because he was male. Therefore, no leniency would bepermitted.

"He's an able lad. They all are. Give 'em a chance and they mightget themselves a good career on this or another ship," Charlie thedeck hand advised as they worked along side by side aloft on themizzen-mast tying the topgallant sail to the yardarm.

"I know they are, Charlie, but Tomas is genuinely terrified. Themate sending him up all the time just makes it worse, and we'restill in port. Think what it's going to be like when the shipstarts to roll from side to side," Emer said as she secured thesail, and then on the loud count of the bo'sun, began to heave thesheet up to fold it and furl it to the yard.

"You just worry about yourself, Missy," Charlie advised. "The


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missus is lovely, but the captain can be a right devil when thingsgo wrong. If you're the nearest target, you'll get it. And thesecond mate Pertwee can be worse if he's had a bit too much todrink."

This last comment was overheard by the rest of the men hanging overthe yard, and they all laughed.

"You'd better not tell the girl any more, Charlie, else she'll jumpship. Then we really will get hell from the captain. I hear shecan cook like one o' them French chefs," Fred, another deck hand,called.

"In that case, Emer, I take back every word I said, and will youmarry me!" Charlie teased.This became a standing joke between her and the rest of the men,that they all wanted to marry her because she could cook and sew.

Emer didn't mind the light-hearted banter, but Garvan objectedstrenuously when they came down to secure the mizzen topsail and heoverheard.

"She's marrying me, gentlemen, so I'll thank you to keep your ruderemarks to yourself," he thundered indignantly.

Emer blushed. "Garvan, they were just joking!" she scolded herblond fiance in an undertone.

"I don't care. Those Canadian louts have no right to speak to you

like that!" Garvan growled.

"Those Canadian louts, as you have so loudly called them, are ourcomrades for the next few weeks aboard this ship, and we all needto work together. So I'm not going to put up with any hostility or

jealousy, is that understood? I am a free woman still, Garvan, andI refuse to be treated like a piece of your property to do with asyou will."

"If I could treat you like that, Emer Nugent, I would make sure youwere dressed like a lady and safely confined in the hold, not

consorting with ruffians and swaggering about dressed as a man inthose shocking clothes."

"I don't see what's so shocking about a shirt and trousers. Youall wear them. I'm completely covered from head to foot. Besides,this shirt and waistcoat of Martin's are far more modest than someof the low cut gowns I've seen the women hereabouts wearing!"

The whole crew hanging on the yard began to laugh uproariously.


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Fred said, "That wasn't a very good comparison to make, girlie."

"Why not?" Emer asked as she hauled up the sail.

"They're not exactly, er, um, ladies. They're plying their trade,er, showing their wares, so to speak," Charlie answered with a blush.

"That's enough, I will not permit such talk," Garvan blustered.

Emer's eyes lit up as she grasped what they were trying to tellher. "Oh, I see. They're prostitutes," she said matter-of-factly.

Garvan choked, while a few of the men giggled.Her brother Cormac glowered. "Disgraceful!"

"I don't see why! If men didn't pay women like them to do thatjob, they wouldn't have to walk the streets, displaying their wares

as Charlie said," Emer replied indignantly. "Or is it that youdon't object to them existing, you just object to my knowing aboutthem?"

"This is not the kind of conversation we should be having in frontof a respectable governess," Oran butted in gently.

Emer laughed. "Lord, I've heard far worse when the genteel Cormacover there stubs his toe on the bed-post in the morning, and thatfrom two doors away."

She grinned at her brother cheekily, as she furled the sail andtied it adeptly.

"That's it, I'm telling Da!" Cormac insisted.

"What, that I've seen a prostitute? You'd have to be blind not tonotice them," Emer said airily, causing the crew to snigger again.

"But before you permit yourself to get on your moral high horse,just stop to think that there's a famine raging in this country.Maybe some of those poor women, who look more like painted

skeletons than voluptuaries, are walking those docks because theyhave no other way of feeding themselves or their children. Maybewhoring is a damned sight better than starving to death!

"Or maybe they're saving up the money to get a passage on one ofthese ships the only way they can. So before you open your mouth,Cormac, just stop to think how lucky we are, with jobs, and ourpassage paid for. Who's to say what any of us would resort to inorder to protect our families and stay alive?" Emer concluded with


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a telling look at her brother.

He now climbed down the shroud to the deck below looking as blackas a thundercloud, with Garvan following on close behind.

Charlie let out his breath in a whoosh. "Well, Emer, you suretold them. Old Cormac there looked mad enough to spit."

"Ach, sure, we're always fighting. It's nothing to get worriedabout."

All the same, she knew Cormac and Garvan were seriously offendedbyher outspoken ideas.Fred continued to stare at her.

"What, do you disagree with me as well?"

"No, Emer, not at all," Fred denied quickly. "I've just neverheard a woman talk like that before. No wonder you and your brotherfight."

"Cormac may be the eldest, and a man, but anyone can see who's thehead of your family," Charlie admired.

Emer caught her other brother Martin's eye as the crew climbed downto lower the mizzen course yardarm to tie on the third sail.

He urged gently, "Don't let Cormac upset you, Emer. He's getting

more and more stuffy by the day."

"Thanks, Martin. I appreciate having you on my side for a change,"Emer said sincerely.

"It's better siding with Cormac than getting caught in the middle,and besides, I always did like supporting the underdog. With yourfiery temper and sharp tongue, Emer, the poor man never stands achance." Martin winked at his sister then, and they continued theirchores without any further incidents.


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CHAPTER SEVEN

The crew fell into their bunks exhaustedly as the darkness finallysettled over Dublin Saturday night, and the moon rose high in thesky. Most of the work was now done, and the ship was as ready as itcould be for the long voyage to Quebec.

All was well on the ship, high spirited in fact. They were feelingso lively, in fact, that after Emer's argument with her eldestbrother, the crew took to taunting Cormac with the word"Prostitute," muttered or called out from above every so often,

just so they could see his back stiffen.

Emer felt sorry for Cormac, but there was little she could do.

In any case, her many chores on the ship ensured that she usuallydidn't see him or Martin and the Dillon brothers as often as she

saw the Lynches, Charlie and Fred.

Her daily routine aboard ship began at four, when she was called bythe men just coming off watch. She would head to the main galleyabove, situated between the two companionways up to the poop deckand next to the corridors which led to the captain's livingquarters and the two cabins for the first and second mates.

Once inside the galley, Emer had to build up and stoke the fires asshe heated water for breakfast and the senior crew's andpassengers' ablutions.

She was also instructed to put on a huge vat of porridge everymorning, and follow the steward's instructions concerning Mrs.Jenkins' menus for the day.

This morning they were to have steak and eggs, and Emer alsohurriedly kneaded some dough for biscuits, a particular favouritewith the captain.


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On other mornings, so long as the fresh ingredients held out, shewould beat flour with eggs and milk to make griddlecakes. Emerknew they would taste very different with goats' milk in them, anddreaded having to cross the wide Atlantic with no cow's milk forthe children.

Voicing her fears to Mr. Bradley the steward, he suggested she ask

for some of the goat milk in return for looking after thecantankerous creature.

Mrs. Jenkins agreed to the proposal with alacrity when she cameinto the salon that morning for breakfast.

When the water was hot enough and while the biscuits and oatmealcooked, Emer brought hot water to each cabin, and returned to setthe table.

Once she had milked the goat, set the table, and they had eaten,

she then cleared the table and washed the dishes.

Emer's next chore after the breakfast was to clean out the six mainrooms in the stern, starting with the captain's cabin and salon.

She made each bed, emptied each basin and chamberpot, andswabbedthe decks. Then she would have to go above to swab the poop deck,and return to the galley to do laundry for the senior crew and anypassengers on board.

Cathan's duties were quite similar, except that he helped in thelower galley next to the gallery and passenger's staterooms, andhad to keep the deck amidships in mint condition.

He fetched and carried for the cook who attended to the crew, andalso helped with their mountain of laundry and mending.

Emer was also asked to lend a hand if things were particularlybusy, and they were expected to help the lamp trimmer maintain hislanterns for the whole ship.

But Emer's favourite task was to go down with the storekeeper andhelp measure out rations of oatmeal and ship's biscuit and so onfor the crew.

It was like being a small child raiding a secret cupboard full offascinating objects. She especially loved siphoning off the crew'sallowance of lime juice in the mornings, and rum in the evenings,from the huge barrels stored below.


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By the time the morning chores were finished, it was time to startdinner. After that meal was completed and the dishes done, Emermight be asked to go up on deck to help with the sails, or give theship's carpenter some assistance in his little store up at thefront of the ship.

Her brother Martin discovered he had some woodworking talent, and

Emer would follow his instructions when required.

Then it would be time for supper, and early to bed for an earlyrise the next morning.On the morning of their departure, Emer hadn't needed to beawakened; she was already far too excited about leaving for Canadato sleep.

She went through her chores in a whirl that morning, and before sheknew it, it was time for all the passengers to begin boarding.

All the hands were on deck to help the steerage passengers boardand get settled as quickly as possible, and as Charlie had said,the captain made sure that the throng was kept in order, and onlyten women and children at a time allowed to board in and orderlybut brisk fashion.

As she watched, Emer saw many familiar faces from Kilbracken, suchas Marion Lacy and Aine Flanagan, who looked white-faced with fear.

But most of her friends and acquaintances, weary from their longwalk, and dazed by the enormity of what they were doing, staggeredup the gangplank almost blindly.

Emer said hello to them by name, and they would each smile whenthey finally recognized her in her sailors' outfit, and then movebelow.

Often Emer went down with them to help them stow their luggage, andthe bunks soon began to fill.

Busy though Emer was, she could not fail to notice the otherwretches who boarded the ship. Some of them look like skeletons,and one of them, who spoke no English, explained that since they

could get no ship from the western ports when they had been evictedfrom their homes, they had walked all the way from Donegal, almostthree hundred miles away. Their feet were bleeding and raw, andmany of the women were shivering even though it was a hot day inMay.

"They have fever," she said in a low voice to Charlie. "Whatshould we do?"


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"There isn't much we can do, except maybe to put the worst ones inthe bunks at the back, furthest away from the others," h

Hunger for Love

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