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Friday 2nd November
Silwood Bonfire Night pl8
News p2,3 Science, Art and Ethics plO Edwina Currie p 11
: 3
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Massive restructur ing of the college day is
be ing cons idered by a col lege commit tee ,
the ' W o r k i n g Par ty on the Col lege Day ' ,
chai red by Professor A l a n Swanson.
The Rector , Sir Eric A s h , told Fe l ix that
the idea had emerged from a B o a r d of
Studies discussion in w h i c h students were
represented. He pointed out that the
college was 'short of teaching space -
lecture rooms, seminar rooms, short of
space at lunch , short of t imetabl ing space
wi th the n o v e l combinat ions l ike
chemist ry and management and four
year courses requi r ing language study'.
H e said that the commit tee was to
rec ieve feedback from students, and
stressed that there was to be no increase
in contact hours. He preferred a
' reduct ion on number of lecture hours'
and an increase in the number of
seminars.
He added that 'classical office hours
were a terr ible straitjacket' and 'there
was a lot to be said for start ing at 8.30',
w h i c h w o u l d ease t ravel f rom afar as it
w o u l d avo id the rush hour. He said that
staff w h o w o u l d still hit the rush hour
could come in earlier and w o r k before
the proper day started.
Professor Swanson said that the
commit tee was st i l l in the process of
asking the departments for their v iews,
and that the IC U n i o n President, Paul
Shanley, was on the commit tee to express
the students' point of v i ew. H e said that
the Humani t ies department couldn' t do its
job under the present t imetabl ing
constraints. In addit ion departments w i l l
have to be cont ro l led to stop them g iv ing
more lectures in the extra t ime this
proposal w o u l d produce.
H e added that he had wr i t ten to a l l the
people w h o might be affected - inc lud ing
Rob Northey, Refectories Manager - to
ask their opinions .
The change to the college day w i l l be
discussed at the U n i o n Gene ra l Meet ing at
1.00 on Thursday 8th N o v e m b e r in the
Great Ha l l . Please note that the date in
the advert isement on the back cover is
w r o n g - the U G M is on Thursday , not
Tuesday as pr in ted .
Stick-Up Suzanne Ahmet Resigns T h e Management schools ' plaque was
myster ious ly returned to its or ig ina l
posi t ion last Sunday. It was stuck to the
w a l l upside d o w n wi th B l u - T a c k , w i t h a
carrot attached. A message was left w i th
the sign saying that it had c o m e from 'the
Phan tom Carrot ' . The perpetrator is
thought to reside in Fa lmouth K e o g h H a l l .
It is be l i eved that a member of the
Roya l Col lege of Science U n i o n (RCSU)
stole the sign be l i ev ing it to be a part of
mascotry. T h e R C S U mascot ry team have
been unavai lable for comment .
T h e o r ig ina l sign was due for
repacement and a new plaque has been
on order for some time.
More Thefts A 'considerable amount of theft' has
occured this term, accord ing to M r T e r ry
Br i l ey , securi ty officer at IC. 'Since the
beginning of the te rm there have been 38
recorded thefts .. this is worse than
before', he said on Wednesday .
H e added that this week has seen three
b ike thefts - a total of £ 6 0 0 . A wallet
conta in ing chequebook, d r i v i n g l icence
and £ 2 2 0 was stolen from the U n i o n
G y m . M r Br i l ey advised that lockers must
be used, and added that if anyone is seen
act ing suspiciously - for e x a m p l e loi ter ing
a round cars o r in departments - the
observer should immedia te ly report them
on extens ion 3372.
A football kit and two footballs were
stolen from the Southside bar on
Wednesday even ing . Paul Shanley, U n i o n
President, said that the kit be longed to a
member of Imperial 's 1st team and was
insured for £ 3 6 0 .
Suzanne A h m e t has res igned as Ex te rna l
Affairs Officer (EAO) to enable her to
continue her normal affairs as R C S U
President. A letter of resignation was sent
to M u r r a y W i l l i a m s o n , H o n Sec (Events),
dated the 28th October .
Papers for the re-election of the E A O
Insult Last week the Universi t ies Fund ing
C o u n c i l (UFC) rejected univers i ty bids for
an increase in Gove rnmen t funding.
A lmos t 95% of universi t ies had requested
an increase exceed ing the levels
suggested. T h e move by the U F C may
have been in retal ia t ion for the
universit ies fai l ing to meet 'cost-cutting'
targets p rev ious ly set by the Government .
The decis ion was descr ibed by Sir
E d w a r d Parkes as a 'grotesque insult to
universit ies ' .
The univers i ty bids may have been an
attempt to c ove r the cost of the
Government ' s p lan to double the number
of students enter ing higher education by
the year 2000. Student numbers have
increased by about 13% o v e r the last two
years without an increase in funding.
Sir E d w a r d said that the Government ' s
expans ion plans were unrealist ic at the
present level of funding and that he
be l ieved universi t ies w o u l d not sacrifice
the quali ty of educat ion to augment
student numbers . He s t rongly denied
allegations that universi t ies had secretly
col laborated to sabotage the new funding
system in w h i c h funds w o u l d be al located
to universi t ies that could p rov ide the
cheapest educat ion.
Mrs . Curr ie said ' A n y expans ion has to
be funded three ways; tax payers, the
students and their families, and the
universit ies themselves. '
were put up o n the 29th Oc tober on the
staircase leading to the U n i o n Office.
W h e n quest ioned about the act ion Ms
A h m e t said T d rather do two jobs we l l ,
than three jobs in a mediocre-fashion ' .
Soon after Sir Geoffrey H o w e resigned.
UCLU Loss Univers i ty Col lege Student U n i o n (UCLU)
are to lose their G y m , w o r k s h o p and the
'Garage' . This fol lows last year 's wrangles
over the affair (Felix, issues 868-870, M a y
this year). N ick M c A l p i n e , Publ ic i ty and
Communica t ions officer of U C L U , told
Fe l ix that the affected clubs had been
relocated 'as a short te rm measure ' .
He added that the pharmaceut ica l
c o m p a n y 'E i sa i ' had 'donated ' £ 2 5 0 , 0 0 0 to
the college for the use of their facilities,
but that it was the M e d i c a l Research
C o u n c i l (MRC) that was to use the area
previous ly occup ied by U n i o n buildings.
H e added that 'the picture has i m p r o v e d
since we learned more .... w e have all
ta lked sensibly and the col lege is ve ry
helpful at the moment ' . He sa id that the
un ion 'aims to get a long t e rm solution -
we are m a k i n g sure that the issue is kept
on the boi l ' .
Give Blood If y o u want to help med ica l science but
don't want to die first, Ci ty and Guilds
Col lege U n i o n (C&GU) w i l l be running a
b lood donat ing session in the Southside
g y m on Tuesday the 13th November .
Sign up n o w in the Gui lds office or in
the J C R this Tuesday (6th November) . A l l
of the college are we lcome .
2
Solar Particle Detector 1
Non Sabbatical for Fe l ix to be elected
A mot ion p ropos ing the e lect ion of a non-
sabbatical F e l i x editor w i l l be put to the
U n i o n Genera l Meet ing (UGM) on
Thursday 8th November . He or she w i l l
w o r k alongside a Print Uni t Manager w h o
w i l l arrange the pr in t ing of F e l i x and
outside print jobs. The editor w i l l receive
an honora r ium similar to that rece ived by
the Presidents of C & G U , R C S U and
R S M U , equivalent to two terms' rent in
Southside.
This solut ion to the lack of a sabbatical
Fe l ix editor was produced by an elect ion
TO A L L L E C T U R E R S
THIS MONTH THE BOOKSTORE WILL BE
PLACING STOCK ORDERS FOR BOOKS
REQUIRED FOR CHRISTMAS READING AND
THE NEW YEAR.
PLEASE ENSURE THAT WE CAN GIVE THE
STUDENTS THE BEST POSSIBLE SERVICE BY
INFORMING US IMMEDIATELY OF THE
TEXTS YOU ARE ABOUT TO RECOMMEND.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION
ICU BOOKSTORE
commit tee compr i s ing the Execut ive
Commit tee and four others. The Un ion
C o u n c i l has agreed to the mot ion being
put to the U G M but the Col lege must
agree to the change in elect ion
procedure. The runn ing of a non-
sabbatical e lect ion w h e n a sabbatical post
has not been fi l led is a departure from
the no rma l sys tem.
If the mot ion is passed papers w i l l go
up on the 12th, d o w n on the 23rd. V o t i n g
w i l l be on the 3rd and 4th December .
E N G L A N D vrs
ARGENTINA Sat 3rd November
K.O. 2.30pm
TWICKENHAM
Tickets available from
I.C. Union Office
Friday lunchtime
A Cosmic Ray and Solar Par t ic le detector,
part of w h i c h was built at Imperial , was
swi tched on b y remote con t ro l on the
23rd October . It is aboard the space
probe Ulysses, more than 18 m i l l i o n k m
from Ear th . T w o days later Imperial 's
magnetometer was made opera t ional by a
s ignal that took over a minute to reach
the probe.
The magnetometer is a h ighly sensitive
magnet ic field detector, capable of
measuring fields up to a m i l l i o n times
weaker than the Earth's f ield. It w i l l study
the large scale structure of magnet ic field
lines in the hel iosphere.
A l l of the observat ions of the sun's field
have so far been conf ined to the ecl ipt ic
plane. The observat ions made wi th
instruments from Imperial Col lege and the
Jet Propuls ion Labora to ry w i l l p rov ide
data to test the three d imens iona l models
proposed by theorists. This m a y help us
to understand the e leven yea r solar
act ivi ty cycle . Rela ted to the Sun's
magnetic phenomena this is be l ieved to
affect weather patterns on Ear th .
Imperial 's other instrument on board, a
set of two a tomic particle detectors, w i l l
measure fluxes in energetic protons
released from the sun in solar flares. T h e
instrument, part of a complex of detectors
p rov ided by an internat ional consor t ium
of scientific institutes, w i l l investigate the
w a y in w h i c h the heliosphere, and in
part icular the sun, can act as a highly
efficient part icle accelerator.
Chaos 'Chaos in B io log ica l Systems' w i l l be
discussed by Professor R . M . M a y o n
Thursday 7th November . T h e lecture w i l l
be held at 1.15 in Physics Lecture
Theatre 1. E v e r y b o d y w e l c o m e .
Fire Fire broke out in Berna rd Sunley last
M o n d a y w h e n a gri l l caught light. Chr is
Donegan , a past wa rden of Be rna rd
Sunley, said that a student d iscovered the
fire and put out the flames wi th an
ext inguisher . He said that there had been
a large amount of smoke p roduced w h i c h
set of the a larms at a round midnight .
M r Donegan said that the cooker
i n v o l v e d had been examined by the
Col lege e lec t r ic ian and had been passed
as safe. It was n o w back in use.
M r Donegan said that there had been a
good response' to the a l a rm . H e
commented that there had been a fire
a la rm test o n l y that m o r n i n g at 8.00.
3
REVIEWS
The F r e s h m a n Brando! Broder ick! Together at last on
the big screen! Mat thew Brode r i ck is the
Freshman and M a r l o n Brando is Ca rmine
Sabatini w h o bears a start l ing
resemblance to., er-m...
Brode r i ck is new in the B i g A p p l e and
manages to find a w o r m in the first
nineteen minutes w h o makes off w i th all
his clothes, m o n e y and self-respect. (The
latter may not be strictly accurate). His
father is as nutty as someth ing ve ry nutty
indeed and tighter than someth ing we
can't ment ion on prime-t ime Fr iday fare.
His professor runs a fi lm col lege from his
o w n books, w h i c h are compul so ry to the
course (sound familar eh kids ?) and so
Our Hero has no choice but to take the
first job offer he gets.
W h i c h , in the way of such things, is
offered to h im by the ve ry self-same
crook w h o r ipped him off in the first
place. Said v i l l a in introduces B r o d to
Brand ; o l ' ' F ive M i l l i o n Dol la rs For The
First F ive Minutes ' plays an honest Italian
impor ter w h o has a poster of Mussol in i
for sent imental reasons and a vacancy for
a nice lad to run del iver ies at a thousand
dollars a trip.
This poses a mora l d i l e m m a for an
honest young fresher since he doesn't
k n o w the nature of his goods. A t this
point, the f i lm, w h i c h has thus far been
shaping up as a gentle but obvious M o b
comedy takes a turn for the surreal w i t h
the unment ionable package. It also grows
a good deal funnier, if y o u have a secret
hatred of shopping centres and petrol
station attendants.
Because this is a Mat thew Broder ick
film it ends in gratuitous but not
una l loyed happiness. Var ious compl ica ted
mora l issues resolve themselve neatly and
al l is we l l wi th the wor ld .
The Freshman is nicely made, cer tainly
not dull , and both stars give appeal ing
and credible performances. It wins big
B r o w n i e points from us and we saw
Mar ie l l a Frostrup in the audience.
P.S. For those of y o u w h o may not
have unders tood the above rev iew,
T . A . F . G . M . w o u l d l ike to summarise as
follows : It's a good fi lm. It's a light
comedy. Go and see it. A N D we saw
Mar i e l l a Frostrup in the audience
(P.P.S. W h y don't we get crap films any
more ?)
The Amaz ing Fly ing Gerbi l Machine
A n d A Bag Of Fish, Please.
The Enchantment The Enchantment (Japanese wi th Engl i sh
subtitles) is b i l l ed as an 'ul t ra-modern f i lm
noir ' . V e r y catchy, I'm sure. The plot
concerns a psychiatrist (played by a
r emarkab ly western l o o k i ng Japanese
mode l / ac to r—Masao Kusakari) w h o
becomes i n v o l v e d w i t h a mysterious (and,
quite natural ly, beautiful) patient. She
happens to have a serious mul t ip le
personali ty problem, , on top of w h i c h she
holds great a n d dark secrets in her
heart(s) etc, etc.
Unfortunately, though the plot may
twist and turn , the fi lm rattles a little too
much—it is not quite as smooth as the
makers must have hoped. It's not too hot
on the noir bit either. Y o u can't just have
a load of shadows and say: we l l boys,
here's a fi lm noir . It lacks the
psychologica l depth, the tension, the
atmosphere of the genre.
A l l this apart, however , there are some
'nice bits'. The re is a nice piece of i rony
in the opening and closing sequences (the
psychiatrist is seen in the first shot of the
movie to have near ly cured a taxi-dr iver
of his obsession wi th an ex-girlfr iend,
whi le at the end it is the kwack w h o
is . . .wel l , y o u can guess). T h e relat ionship
between the psychiatrist and his gir lfr iend
is also quite interesting.
The Enchantment runs at the ICA until
November 19.
lft.
D r . F a u s t u s English National Opera, London Coliseum, 20th October.
A cross between '42nd Street', 'The
R o c k y H o r r o r Show' and an amateur
Gilbert and Sul l ivan? That was one
verdict on the E N O ' s r e v i v a l of Busoni 's
Doctor Faust.
F r o m the momen t the cur ta in rises to
reveal Faust si t t ing at a mode rn
executive 's desk, wea r ing a mode rn suit
and towered ove r by piles of filing
cabinets a r ranged like a city skyscraper
skyl ine , the audience knows it is in for an
updat ing of the s ixteenth century
mora l i ty tale to the twent ie th century.
In fact the who le design lacks cohesion:
ostensibly set in the early twenties, w i th
the w o m e n at the court of P a r m a
wear ing beaded 'flapper' dresses, the
chorus are dressed l ike thirties mafia and
He len of T r o y appears to have wandered
in from the Cole Porter musica l next
door. Mephistopheles ' t ransformation into
Faust's stage assistant, wea r ing pink
basque, red garter and red stilettos was
obvious ly meant to parody the magician's
assistant's role , but mere ly ended up
camp.
These points w o u l d be mere ly irr i tat ing if
it were not that the set itself, dragged out
of mothballs for this rev iva l of a 1986
product ion , looks on the point of collapse.
H o w e v e r , the staging does show some
nice touches, for example , the tr iangular
floor consists of strips of rubber th rough
w h i c h heads, hands and bodies can
appear and disappear, but w h i c h can also
be wa lked across l ike a sol id floor.
A n o t h e r d isappoint ing area is the
choreography. It was difficult to tell
whether s imi lar movements were meant
to be unsynchronised or were s imply
s loppi ly performed. The E N O are
apparently unable to stage conv inc ing
look ing c r o w d scenes: the chorus seems
to m i l l r andomly , exhib i t ing no emot ion
or sense.
What is good about this product ion? The
orchestra, under the di rect ion of A n t h o n y
Beaumont , p lay br i l l iant ly as always, even
if they sometimes d r o w n out the singers.
A l a n Opie's Faust is excel lent in such a
chal lenging role . H e has m a n y protracted
monologues and is on stage for almost all
three hours of the opera. G r a h a m Clark ,
recreat ing the role of Mephistopheles
from the or ig ina l product ion, is also a fine
performer.
The direct ion shows some fine insight
dur ing parts of the product ion , but varies
be tween frenetic, seemingly pointless
act ivi ty and moments of v isual banali ty.
H o w e v e r it a l lows the opera's theme, that
'human beings are responsible for their
o w n actions a n d may not ascribe even
their cr imes and achievements to either
G o d or the D e v i l ' , to develop through
good use of repeated imagery .
This is cer ta in ly not a good int roduct ion
to opera for the uninit iated. It is perhaps
on ly fit for those w h o w i s h to be
chal lenged. This w o u l d have been far
better as a concert performance than as a
visual mess o n stage.
Doctor Faust continues in repertoire until
Novm be r 15th.
Liz W .
T h e H a n d m a i d ' s T a l e Kate (Natasha Richardson), her husband
her small daughter have just failed to
escape from the Republ ic of Gi lead
(formerly the U S A ) . Her husband lies
dead in the snow, she is sur rounded by
a rmed border guards, and her daughter
has s tumbled off into the bushes
frightened by all the noise.
She ends up wi th many other w o m e n
who , for one reason or another, have
been rounded up by the pol ice and they
are separated into those w h o are fertile
and those w h o are not. The fertile
w o m e n are sent off to be t ra ined as
handmaids—surrogate mothers for couples
w h o cannot have ch i ld ren of their o w n
because the wife is sterile.
It is the near future. W h a t was former ly
the U S A has been taken o v e r by a group
of rel igious r ight -wing fundamentalists.
99% of the popula t ion have been
rendered sterile as a result of nuclear
accidents and chemica ls in the
atmosphere. T h e government supports
rac i sm and capi ta l punishment (by
hanging) for such cr imes as rape, adultery
and homosexual i ty .
T h e or ig in for the handmaids comes
Queendom Come By Ellen Galford The author of this book doesn't have a
chip on her shoulder, she's got five
pounds of K i n g Edwards!
Set in a future w o r l d where the
Conservat ive party has created a Blue
Re ich , the s tory revolves m a i n l y a round
Scot land in general , and Ed inbu rgh in
part icular. T h e government has taken the
Conservat ive ideals to their i l logical
extremes, cu lmina t ing w i t h such
momentous pieces of legislat ion as 'The
Sexual Norma l i ty A c t . '
To save the people from their
predicament Queen A l b a n n a is brought
forward in t ime by her sorceress. A s y o u
can imagine she comes from a t ime
where things are rather different,
par t icular ly in sexual terms.
The P r ime Minister , as ever interested
in her publ ic i ty , tries to use her to gain
support for the dictatorship style
government . Unfortunately A l b a n n a
doesn't p lay by the rules, creat ing havoc
and m a y h e m whe reve r and wheneve r she
can.
It is defiantly not for the conservat ive
minded and I don't expect m a n y people
have read a lesbian love scene? W e l l y o u
won' t here ei ther but no subject is taboo
and she definatly pulls no punches w h e n
it comes to the present government .
A reasonable book but I can't help
th ink ing that if she could control her
paranoia the author could become a ve ry
good wri ter .
Ian Hodge.
from the story in the O l d Testament of
Jacob and Rache l . Rache l gave her
handmaid to Jacob so she could have a
ch i ld for her. This story forms the basis of
the ' ceremony ' : a sexual act tak ing place
at a t ime w h e n the handmaid is at her
most fertile a n d in the presence of the
wife. It is ve ry co ld and impersona l and
unsett l ing for a l l three i n v o l v e d .
A l t h o u g h , because of their fertility,
handmaids have theoret ical ly got a high
posi t ion in society, they are ve ry m u c h
beneath wives and are ac tual ly not
treated we l l—when they do have a baby
they don't even get a chance to see if it's
a boy or gir l before the mother has
wh i sked it off and c la imed it as her o w n .
Kate , a l though ou tward ly s u b s e r v i e n t -
one has to be to surv ive—never gives up
hope of f inding her daughter (who, she
finds out, is be ing brought up by another
couple) and either o v e r t h r o w i n g the
government or escaping from the
country. She has become i n v o l v e d wi th
an underground group w o r k i n g to restore
the country .
E v e n though Kate is go ing through a
ve ry t raumatic t ime the f i lm never
actual ly becomes emotional—it is far too
factual and realistic. Read ing about the
whole si tuation may seem very far
fetched but the f i lm makes it appear far
too plausible.
J L W .
Young Guns II
Not no rmal ly a fan of westerns I was
pleasantly surprised by this one. Un l ike
most sequels w h i c h seem main ly a
vehic le for m a k i n g a lot of money on the
strength of the or ig ina l film's name, this
one did actually appear to have a plot
and a purpose.
The fi lm begins w i th a solici tor 's
representat ive meet ing an o ld cowboy ,
w h o calls himself Brushy B i l l Roberts and
claims to be B i l l y the K i d . He knows he is
dy ing and wants to be pardoned. He says
he was pardoned over seventy years
before and wants this pardon to be made
official. The y o u n g man pooh-poohs this
story because he knows the legend of
h o w B i l l y the K i d was assassinated and
therefore can't be standing before h im
now. So the o ld c o w b o y tells h im how it
happened.. .
T h e story is ac tual ly based a round fact.
One of Bi l ly ' s former friends wrote a
book cal led 'The Real Life of B i l l y the
Kid '—but it was a failure, a n d a m a n
c la iming to be B i l l y the K i d did actually
turn up in 1950.
E m i l i o Es tevez as B i l l y the K i d
successfully combines characterists of the
a rche typal cowboy—spinn ing of pistols
and l igh ten ing qu ick d r a w — w i t h a
realistic por t raya l of the K i d as a person
rather than a legend.
I d i d real ly enjoy this fi lm it is a
humourous f i lm wi th a plot and also good
d r a m a w h i c h w i l l please people l ike
myself. Fo r the western buff there's the
obl igatory gratuitous v io lence , frequent
shootouts and even a little sex.
J L W .
Strategy Consulting
at
McKinsey & Company
McKinsey & Company
invite you to an
open presentation on
career opportunities for
graduates and postgraduates
on Wednesday,
November 7, 1990
at 6:30 pm in the
Pippard Lecture Theatre
McKinsey &Company
Greame chats to the Unstoppable Sex Machine.
C a r t e r I n t e r v i e w MUSIC
'He l lo . Have y o u got a tape recorder? ' He
smi led s incere ly and his manner was v e r y
poli te. Nice m a n this J i m Bob , 1 thought. I
did have a tape recorder so we got on
wi th the in te rv iew.
'Is it alr ight if its just me., he's in a bad
mood , probably just smash your
walkman! . . '
J i m Bob and Frui t Bat, the two
members of Carter The Unstoppable Sex
Machine, we re in B r i x t o n p l ay ing T h e
Fridge. Prac t ica l ly a home gig (they l ived
about two miles away), it comes towards
the end of a gruel l ing U K tour.
'It's just his name., his name is Carter
and I started taking the piss, about the
sex machine , and it just stuck. '
A l t h o u g h J i m Bob general ly sings the
songs, both members d e m a n d equal
attention on stage, and yet they both lose
to the adrenal ine pumped music they
thrash out. This is h igh technology guitar
pop, set against a manic b a c k i n g tape of
drums, keyboards , bass a n d samples.
E a c h of their guitars pierce through this
melange wi th ove rd r iven riffs of such
hype that even the stiffs g roove d o w n .
'Ye a h , we l ay the patterns d o w n on a...
yeah , good guess, as Ales i s . . ' (a d rum
mach ine for those not in the know) ' . .and
then go into the studio, add other sounds
and the rest of it. W e do use samples but
less and less now. '
The wa y their sound goes together
makes it hard to characterise Carter.
' W e l l , w e ' v e been c o m p a r e d to so
many , The Clash., even the Pet Shop
Boys.' I myself can find no adequate
compar i son a l though The Shamen p rov ide
a s imilar sort of stage show. Strobes and
lights all add to the si tuation to create an
audio visual exper ience.
'Ye a h , tonight we w i l l use their
projectors here. Basical ly because they
won ' t let us use our backdrops .
Appa ran t ly they ' re not p roper ly fire
proofed. W e k n o w because the stage
manager set fire to them. He S E T F I R E to
them just to p roove a point , wanker .
W e ' r e going to set fire to h i m later!' This
unique style also gives t hem a universa l
audience, f rom the indie biker ' s jacket to
the dancey Converse boot.
'I don't th ink it actual ly existed, it was
just thought up by somebody . Y o u can't
l iken The Happy Mondays to James or
The Stone Roses or The Inspirals. There
are bands around, l ike The Charlatans,
w h o are inf luenced by one of those four
and then other bands have copied them.
They ' re c o p y i n g the w r o n g ones. '
'The acid thing? Don' t rea l ly have t ime,
sometimes dance to it.'
Carter's n e w single, Any Time, Any
Place, Anywhere, is the first released
since s igning to R o u g h Trade . A l r e a d y it
snip - <!
" * ' 3 i .
is h igh up in the Indie charts at Number
4 and is a l l set to s torm the Gal lop po l l .
T h e single has been g iven g o o d reviews
and J im Bob tells me that the v ideo is
excel lent , though unfortunately is not
rece iv ing m u c h airplay.
'We do want to do we l l in the nat ional
charts. W e want to go on Top Of The
Pops. It's one of our a ims at the moment . '
After ta lk ing to h im, this didn't surprise
me. J i m Bob is actually quite a mi ld ,
conven t iona l chap, despite the impress ion
he gives on stage.
It's obvious Carter don't want to be just
another hip indie band al l their l ives, and
judging by the recept ion from the m i x e d
c r o w d at The Fr idge , I don't th ink that
w i l l be a p rob lem.
The tour has been ve ry hard w o r k for
the two lads and their c r e w (especially
'Fat Bastard ' w h o is hai led w i t h a half full
beer cans at the start of each gig) and
they w i l l be g lad to w i n d it up this week
in Canterbury .
It's then back into the studio to record
the a lbum for Chr is tmas release, at w h i c h
t ime another mini- tour is p lanned, vis i t ing
on ly their favourite venues.
A s the Top Of The Pops theme blur ted
out their entrance, Carter c ame on stage
to a rapturous w e l c o m e a n d qu ick ly went
about the task of b l o w i n g everyone away .
C lu tch ing m y tape recorder (which
hadn.t worked) I watched the steady
s t ream of stage divers jump about a round
Carter and not iced that Frui t Bat never
once stopped smi l ing . H e was l o v i n g it
and I thought about what J i m Bob had
said. I disagree. I can't imagine such nice
people wan t ing to smash m y w a l k m a n !
'Students., no I don't hate them., used
to but I real ised it was pointless. ' Wha t
about those w h o t idd ly-wink d o w n O x f o r d
Street? ' O h yeah , that sort., yeah , they ' re
wankers! '
Graeme
R o s e o f A v a l a n c h e Gone are the black sleeves. Gone is the
sombre dark base. In comes the M o d e r n
Beat and spacey designs IN C O L O U R .
Yes, Rose Of Avalanche have gone the
same way as the Soup Dragons to
achieve commerc i a l prestige...but it
works .
E v e n the first track blights away the
g loom, in Your Light's O n , the benefactial
purchaser is pleased by a l ibera l dosage
of the t radi t ional indie wah-wah and hip
beat, man. A s the cover implies , a
suitable concoct ion of Loop and Primal
Scream, in precise quantities, may total
Rose.
M u c h jolliness ensues. T h e vocals may
be an acqui red taste, but somebody had
to sing. Make It Right is bound to do we l l
when released, and they A R E look ing for
inspirat ion, honest. It's a happy thing.
Suddenly and dauntingly, the m o o d
String A' Beads LP
thickens. The acoustics strike wondrous ly .
E v e n the voice is listenable.
O o h , String'A'Beads is the title track
and deservedly so. Rose take the recipe
and define beat, bends and boppiness.
Shake the ce i l ing . The who le is d r o w n e d
in unashamed convic t ion , no concessions,
no defeat. T h e y seem to cont inue for
ever. The rest mere ly glances by, a
remnant from their earl ier days. H a v i n g
failed the bop-beat scene, they n o w
trespass on New Model Army acoustics
and cliches of typica l loves, lost, held and
lost again, sob, sob. The last track, B e
True To Your Love is memorab le , but
never quite gets there, and ends in a
frustration of noise and wah-wah .
Even so, they seem set to destroy any
mega-basses still intact after the dance
takeover.
SJH
A l i e n S e x F i e n d —Camden Underworld
Alien Sex Fiend, as you might guess from
the name, do not boast a reputat ion as
the most tasteful of bands. The i r difinitive
box-set contains a plastic dog-waste
s imulac rum (commemora t ing their first
release w h i c h flaunted the real vers ion of
same upon its sleeve). This , and the
photos w h i c h adorn the gatefold of their
double l ive L P , d id no th ing to reassure
me, so it was w i t h some trepidat ion that I
found myself dragged to their first U K
dates for a whi l e .
A t first glance the stage did nothing to
quel l m y doubts, swathed as it was in
cotton cobweb and amputee Barbies.
Nick Robertson & Slice
This acoustic offering shows precious little
talent. It ini t ial ly sounds quite pleasant,
Show Me A Sign 12"
inspired perhaps by early Housemartins;
but the singer hasn't got any th ing of
interest to say. The music is hardly
or ig inal , m a k i n g each song sound, at best,
unmemorab le . In an effort to rel ieve the
tedium, Nick deploys g immicks , such as
scatting, but his voice is s imply not up to
it. The title t rack thus ends up as a
complete mess. One song even ends up
wi th the o ld p u b - r o c k tr ick of speeding
the tempo up and up whi le The Flame
sounds l ike a bad copy of a Tracy
Chapman song.
Unless the group can develop an
or ig inal sound of their o w n (assuming
they can find one) they w i l l remain as
creators of sl ightly annoy ing background
music.
Rel
After m u c h be lch ing of d ry ice and not
inconsiderable amounts of audience
anticipat ion the band finally took to the
stage. The guitarist looks 'normal '
enough. The percuss ion/keyboardis t , c lad
in ragged labcoat, is otherwise. Mrs
F iend , also on keyboards, is downright
attractive in purple velvet . N i k Fiend. . .on
stage, at last, is the least pleasant- looking
man I have ever seen; whi te faced,
tarten-trousered and puke-green Riddler
coat.
Thankful ly the stage is too smal l for Nik
to engage in his full antics and the music
more than makes up for it. ASF play a
fusion of H M distort guitar and hard-
edged dance percussion a n d keyboard
w h i c h went d o w n we l l w i t h the audience,
most of w h o m were die-hard aficionados.
W h i l e the songs are formular ised to a
certain degree there's enough var ia t ion to
keep the gig from turning into a straight
forward industr ial dance race, the tempo
rising and fal l ing through the B P M scale.
Dur ing the hour-and-a-half set most of the
old favourites get a dusting off (Gef Into
It, Manic Depression and (ugh!) Sample
My Sausage) and the newer songs are
aired wi th a fair degree of panache for a
first time out. EST...Trip to the Moon and
Boneshaker Baby both m o v e d the c rowd ,
the first as a long, drawn-out synth riff
and the latter as a straight rock 'n ' rol ler .
If you enjoy dance music w i t h a little
more melody and power and y o u can
cope wi th cut-price A l i c e Cooper visuals
ASF might be wor thy of your attention.
Thei r latest a lbum, Curse, is avai lable
now, and they tour again next year.
(This r ev iew has been wr i t ten according
to the new hip 'n ' t rendy editorial policy).
Stone.
U L U A U - N i g h t e r It could have been the most crucia l event
in the L o n d o n student calender . It could
have been k i c k i n ' . I could have t r ipped
out on twelve hours of jol l i ty , music and
50:50 boy g i r l m i x . U L U a l l nighter could
have been A C E .
But it wasn't . Not even close real ly.
Quite an ant i -c l imax, and all rather
upsetting for those who h a d pa id the h igh
entrance fee of S I5 . Perhaps this cost was
the very reason for the night 's downfal l
since essentially the on ly things l ack ing
were people.
Those of us from Imperial Col lege had
the fortunate oppor tuni ty to start F r iday
night off w i t h a visit to the R o y a l Albe r t
Ha l l for a free peace concert wi th Sri
C h i n m o y . I was feeling pretty me l low so
went a long before setting off for U L U .
W h e n 1 left the place I was just so
re laxed m y essential bod i ly functions
were in danger of collapse. A ve ry
strange man that Sri C h i n m o y .
Q u i c k l y into the tube and out to Russell
Square for the g roovy do. W e a r r ived
a round ten thir ty, in just enough t ime to
ca tch Milltown Brothers do their set.
The i r M a n c u n i a n indie sound was to
prove the s tandard for the night, (by
heck, y o u should have seen the flares on
show! Baggy tops, they were pract ical ly
Nana Mouskaris!) but their performance
was one of the best. E v e r y b o d y was dead
jo l ly at this ea r ly stage.
F o l l o w i n g The Brothers came, among
others, Ocean Colour Scene and Flowered
Up. The former were personal ly rather
disappoint ing, a l though the sound was
good. A few songs stuck out as obvious
c r o w d pleasers but other more m o o d y
numbers just seemed to wash over us
i r re levant ly l ike ocean tides. Quite apt.
The f lowery lads from Kings Cross were
re la t ively good . T h e y were headl in ing and
k n e w it, f launt ing to the seething masses
wi th their b rand of scally pop. B y the
middle of their act, half the c r o w d
couldn' t see the band for the other half
we re a l l o n stage do ing their upmost to
be aresholes. Flowered Up actually have
a Bez (re H a p p y Mondays) of their o w n —
a total loony w h o looks l ike one of B i l l
and Ben's mates.
B y this t ime it was two-ish and people
were t i r ing. W e ' d all had our supper (a
jacket potato that I'm sure R S M w o u l d
have been interested in) a n d were
look ing for some s t imulat ion. The bouncy
castle beckoned but the smel l of sweaty
feet that had finally escaped from the
D M s soon put people off that as we l l .
T h e y showed Grease on v ideo , thus
inci t ing a bit of s inging en masse, w h i c h
Flowered Up was fun, but when Robocop came on the
general concensus was that it was just too
loud for five in the m o r n i n g .
The discos started w e l l . There were
two, one for the indie b lack jeans D M lot
and another for the dancy E-generation.
Breakfast was excellent—croissants, j am
and mult iple cups of coffee and at 4 .30am
seemed r emarkab ly appetising.
T h e securi ty staff, w h o were ini t ial ly
just indignant, had finally succumbed to
weariness and n o w couldn' t give a
monkeys fuck for the party, the people or
the rules that governed them.
Seven o 'c lock a r r ived a n d it was t ime
to go. A few hundred had lasted out but
those w h o were conscious numbered on ly
a few.
O n the w h o l e the night was fun, but
not w o r t h the money . L i v e A i d it wasn't .
L o n d o n meets Manchester? Perhaps.
P r e f a b S p r o u t Competition Hammersmith Odeon 22.10.90
W i t h the a lbum comes the tour, o r ig ina l ly
ti t led 'The Comeback . ' F in i sh ing wi th two
nights at the H a m m e r s m i t h Odeon , both
of w h i c h sold out, they p roduced a show
I w i l l r emember for a long t ime.
Prefab Sprout have never hit the mega
market and this showed in the age and
diversi ty of the audience, no sc reaming
teenagers here.
T h e y p layed tracks from four of their
five albums concent ra t ing equal ly on the
new and o ld mater ia l .
For me the whole show was one
continuous delight, cu lmina t ing in their
second encore wi th the p l ay ing of their
most famous song ' W h e n L o v e Breaks
D o w n ' and f inal ly 'Doo W o p in Ha r l e m . '
A wonderful night from a wonderfu l
group, they are not to be missed if you
l ike music where y o u can hear the words.
Ian Hodge.
W e are g iv ing y o u the chance of w i n n i n g
a copy of Prefab Sprout's latest a lbum,
Jordon: The Comeback. W e have three
copies of the cassette and two of the
compact disk, one of w h i c h could be
yours if y o u answer all of the fo l lowing
questions correc t ly .
W h o featured on ha rmonica on the From
Langley Park to Memphis a lbum?
W h i c h of the fo l lowing is not a Prefab
Sprout song?
a) Doo Wop in Harlam.
b) The Devil has all the best tunes.
c) Green Isaac.
d) On the right hand of God.
W h o are the last four t racks on side one
of Jordon about?
W h i c h two members of the band are
related and what do they play.
A l l entries should be sent to the F E L I X
office to a r r ive no later than Wednesday
31st October . Please specify w h i c h format
y o u require, compact disk or cassette.
In the event of more than five correct
entrants the winners w i l l be pul led from a
hat.
International poet and scientist to visit IC
Science, Art, and Ethics H o w long is now? L o o k i n g back it
seemed l ike ages of silence.
I was s tanding at the bar, a pint of
bitter comfor t ing my sense of doing, as
thought about what I could say. He was
an artist, and the other a poet. T h e y
looked at me . I said noth ing . T h e y
wanted me to speak. 1 had noth ing to
say. H o w cou ld I, a student scientist,
relate to their
ways of seeing
and doing.
Miros lav Holub
concludes the title
essay of his book
a metaphor ica l monumen t to the heroes
of science, in his short s tory Argonauts of
the Air.
Miros lav Ho lub is a scientist, in the true
Wel l s i an sense. He is a prol if ic wri ter of
poetry and essays, whilst researching into
i m m u n o l o g y in Prague.
Is he an unusual mam? Undoubted ly . A s
T e d Hughes, poet Laureatte, has wri t ten
The Demension
of the Present
Moment and
other essays w i th
'In this sense, our
ego lasts three
seconds.
Eve ry th ing else is
either hope or an
embarrass ing
incident. Usual ly
both. '
M y
embarrassing
incident was a
feeling of two
worlds , the artist
and the scientist.
The w o r l d of the
creat ive
imaginat ion and
personal
statement, and
that of the d ry
repeti t ive
c r amming ,
measur ing and
count ing. Ye t
does science
really destroy our
sense of wonde r
and creat ivi ty,
whilst art
nurtures and
expresses it?
This is a
question that H . G .
Wel l s raised as a
student here. In the preface to the
student magaz ine he founded and edited
he writes d o w n his expectations. He
expected scientists to be wri ters and
poets. Part of this v is ion of a creative
scientist was inspired by his lecturer, the
Dean of the Col lege , Professor T . H .
H u x l e y . Wel l s was bit terly disappointed
and uses the destruction of the Col lege as
Brief Reflection on test-tubes Take
a piece of fire, a piece of water, a piece of a rabbit or a piece of a tree, or any piece of a human being, mix it, shake it, stopper it up, keep it warm, in the dark, in the light, refrigerated, let it stand still for a while—yourselves far from still but that's the real joke.
After a while you look—and it's growing, a little ocean, a little volcano, a little tree, a little heart, a little brain, so little you don't hear it lamenting as it wants to get out, but that's the real joke, not hearing it.
Then go
and record it, all dashes or all crosses, some with exclamation-marks, all noughts and all figures, some with exclamation-marks,
and that's the real joke, in effect a test-tube is a device for changing noughts into exclamation-marks.
That's the real joke which makes you forget for a while that really you yourself are
In the test-tube.
'Miros lav H o l u b is one of the half dozen
most important poets w r i t i n g anywhere ' .
But is he an abberation? Is his
combina t ion of science and art a freak
accident against the nature of these
subjects?
This is one a m o n g many questions that
Miros lav explores , questions about the
nature of our behaviour , what is a sane
Poem printed by kind permission of Bloodaxe Books Ltd
person, ethics and science, disease and
society. His personal reflections give a
sense of exci tement and wi t whilst
t ravel l ing d o w n beautifully guided
pathways of d iscovery, full of unexpec ted
v iews and destinations. Y e t his grappl ing
w i t h the relat ionship be tween truth and
meaning places at the heart of his w o r k
this relat ionship between poetry and
science.
This is a
p r o b l e m he w i l l
be discussing on
Tuesday
November 13 at
1.15pm in the
Read Lecture
Theatre. It is a
unique and
exc i t ing
oppor tuni ty to
listen to a man at
the forefront of
the explorat ions
of the creat ive
nature of science.
This event is part
of a nat ionwide
tour organised by
the Nat ional
Poetry Society.
His theme is
one that he
shares wi th the
late Jacob
B r o n o w s k i ,
scientist,
broadcaster and
wri ter , whose
o w n explorat ions
of science took
h im to the
concentra t ion
camp at
A u s c h w i t z where
his family died.
His response
illustrates the
impor tance of the
issues at stake.
Issues about the
subjects y o u are
s tudying, the wa y
they are taught, h o w y o u perceive them
and h o w y o u may approach w o r k in
science.
Miros lav H o l u b may change your v iews
about science! He cer tainly raises
questions at Imper ia l that are sometimes
hard to find due to the silence, that Wel ls
also heard, of the c r a m m i n g of science
t ra in ing.
Michael Newman
WANTED Science articles of general interest for FELIX.
If you are interested in a particular aspect of your course then why not write about it? Fame and fortune beckons and it could favour you!
Interested? Come into FELIX and ask for Ian.
Edwina curries favour with students in an.
Unfold ing Future O n Tuesday, M r s E d w i n a Cur r ie , M P ,
visi ted Imperial College. Secur i ty was
rather higher than as for the s imilar visit
by M r Cec i l Pa rk inson , Transpor t
Minister , a fortnight ago, w i t h two
security men o n the door c h e c k i ng bags.
Mrs Curr ie started by ask ing whether
Labour w o u l d w i n the next elect ion, and
answered herself by say ing 'they haven't
got a chance ' . She cited three reasons
w h y she was optimist ic of the Tories
retaining a majori ty in Par l iament .
Firs t ly , Labour have a tendency to pile
up votes in seats they a l ready hold,
rather than seek ing to gain n e w terri tory,
and in many of the seats, they need to
w i n to cont ro l Par l iament , they are not
even in second place beh ind the Tories ,
thus they need to displace the L ibe ra l
Democrats (who she referred to as the
Al l iance) .
Secondly, as a Genera l E lec t ion
approaches, Labour pol icies w o u l d come
under closer scrutiny. She said that
people w o u l d find 'many of these
unworkable , expens ive or empty
promises ' . 'What Labour wants is to
satisfy every interest group in our society,
without it cost ing anybody any extra
money. '
'If y o u go through po l i cy documents
l ike Looking to the Future, w h i c h sounds
l ike something Spielberg should have
been i n v o l v e d in , and add up what they
want to do, and y o u ask whether it is
feasible, in m a n y cases the answer is
'Cou ld be'. '
H o w e v e r , she said that these policies
could not be ca r r i ed out 'wi thout
substantial increase in taxes' .
Th i rd ly , for this reason, she considered
that the T o r y pol icies were vote-winners;
ve ry few people want to part w i th more
money than they have to.
The rhetor ic over, she inv i ted
questions. D u r i n g these it emerged that
she was s trongly against parents hav ing
to support their offspring through college
or univers i ty . She said that w h i l e she was
at univers i ty , she was on full grant, but
the people who had to get some or all of
their money f rom their parents had a
harder t ime w i t h f inancial worr ies , it
be ing more difficult to get m o n e y from
them than a local authori ty . She was also
strongly against further educat ion
Ittfigii
' : i l ^ H H i
St FELIX
Edwina presenting a student with their top-up loan.
institutions cha rg ing tui t ion fees to U K
students, say ing that 'We, as a nation,
benefit from y o u being students'. She
thought that this should be the
Government ' s contr ibut ion towards
further educat ion. She added, ' L i v i n g
expenses are your business'.
H o w e v e r , w h e n quest ioned about
Student Loans , and the effect that this
w o u l d have o n d iscouraging people f rom
poorer backgrounds going to univers i ty
wi th the prospect of a large debt at the
end, Mrs Cur r i e said that as the current
student loan was on ly £ 4 5 0 a year, no
one wou ld get far into debt.
This begs the quest ion of w h o is to
fund further educat ion. If the Gove rnmen t
pays tuition fees, and parents are not to
be invo lved , w h o pays the l iv ing
expenses? She encouraged people to get
hol iday jobs; regardless of the fact that
nearly eve ryone does a n y w a y , even if
only to placate the bank manager .
W h e n quest ioned about the wi thd rawa l
of housing benefit to students, and the
effect this had o n d iscouraging students in
L o n d o n because of the high costs, she
said that the Gove rnmen t was neutral on
where students go for their educat ion, but
that housing benefit was 'for poor people,
not you ' .
She stated that a full grant is more than
a single pensioner gets, a n d that it w o u l d
be very hard to justify students gett ing
more than pensioners. ' Y o u ' d better stock
up on the the rmal underwear and save
on heating bi l ls . '
The National Cu r r i c u l um was raised,
and in defence of it she said that 'it is an
enormous step forward to have one, and
to insist that e v e r y b o d y learns their o w n
language, can spell , can put syntax
together, can add up'. ' Y o u go out and
just ask people how to conver t a fraction
to a dec imal , they don't k n o w what either
of them are, let alone how to do it.'
She thought that there was something
w r o n g wi th the nat ional ethos whe reby
people w o u l d m u c h rather become
apprentices rather than go to univers i ty ,
and w o u l d emp loy accountants rather
than engineers in industr ial management .
H o w e v e r , w i t h the increas ing unity w i th
Europe, she hoped that the respect for
engineers in the U K w o u l d increase, as
on the Cont inent . She suggested that
students should 'get good qualifications,
be ambit ious and get into management ,
or found y o u r o w n business' and then in
t ime it w o u l d be possible to push salaries
for engineers up.
No cont rovers ia l questions were put to
Mrs Curr ie , and this was not because of
the machinat ions of ConSoc: Mrs Cur r i e
selected questions at r andom (unless She
memor i sed a l l ConSoc ' s faces!). The re
wasn't even a reference to eggs. C o m e on
Socialists and Communis t s , where were
you? Af ra id of being conver ted?
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areas of the Arthur Andersen & Co. practice. It provides advice on
a range of strategic and operational issues that adds value to
clients' businesses and facilitates their growth.
Trainee Consultants joining the group undertake data research and
analysis within multidisciplinary FCS teams on assignments of
varying lengths. Thorough in-house training is given in business
skills and the opportunity exists to be sponsored to study for an
MBA at a top business school after two years with the Firm.
Limited vacancies exist for outstanding graduates to join FCS in October 1991.
Further information will be available at a presentation on:-
Monday 5 November 1990
at 6.00 p.m.
at Arthur Andersen & Co., Surrey Street, London WC2
or from Gillian Jones, Arthur Andersen and Co., 1 Surrey Street, London WC2.
a AR T HU R ANDERSEN
ICU Ents Friday Night—The Muscle Shoal.
B J P r e s e n t s . . IF FELIX
Hope you all enjoyed the gig on Fr iday
last, Spirit of Ecstacy—those of y o u w h o
came, tell your friends how to have a
good time. O n c e again any comments or
suggestions w i l l be welcomed—see us
last week's but different bands, obviously
(you're not stupid, are you!!). W e have
the effervessent Muscle Shoal plus support
from the Cuckoos. The Muscle Shoal play
their annual show, wel l they have p layed
probably wouldn ' t bel ieve me. So come
along and see for yourself. A s for the
Cuckoos—well the name speaks for itself.
The price is £ 2 . 0 0 in advance, SI w i th
ents cards and £ 2 . 5 0 on the door. Tickets
a round or drop us a line in the Ents
pigeonhole, this applies to tonight 's event
as we l l as all events.
Tonight , once again, is one of our
Lounge events. O n a ve ry similar ve in to
every year since I've been here and they
are great. 1 could tell y o u about their
haunt ing melodies and excel lent
harmonies these four lovable mop tops
from Moptop T o w n can generate but y o u
can be obtained from the U n i o n Office or
from the friendly hands of the Ents kids.
O h , by the wa y , tonight there is also the
great Ents disco in full effect and a bar
extension unti l 12 o 'clock. See y o u there.
B J , Ents Chair.
£ 2 0 c a s h t o b e w o n FREE PRIZE DRAW
The Union Snack Bar is planning an expansion and is interested to know your answers to the following
questions: 1. What times do you want the Snack Bar to open in the evening?
5-7pm / 6-8pm / 7-9pm / other times
2. On which days would you use it if it was open at the above times?
Mon / Tue / Wed / Thurs/ Fri
3. Would you like:
Hot Meals / Sandwich Bar / Snacks
Entries should be handed into the FELIX Office by Thursday November 8 to qualify for entry into the FREE Prize draw
Your name and department
13
S p o r t Football IC VI-5 QMC IV-4
IC 6ths scored five goals to total 17 in
on ly three games w h e n they k n o c k e d
Queen M a r y & Westf ield Col lege 4ths out
of the U L U cup on Saturday. The game
p roved ve ry tough wi th bo th sides
suffering a number of injuries, most of
w h i c h were caused by D a v e Buckle w h o
left players from both sides sprawled
a round the park. Star IC defender Yasser
H a m d i was taken to hospital w i th a badly
cut lip after a col l is ion in the first half.
Goals from Dave Phil l ips and A k i o
Iwase helped to make the score 2-2 at
half t ime but Q M W scored two quick
goals early in the second half. IC keeper
Mar t in A the r ton kept shout ing in order to
make up for the lack of the large c r o w d
that a team of this s tandard deserves. His
shout ing was rewarded w h e n two goals
from K e i t h Corde i ro and one from
A n d r e w Stanni land in the last 20 minutes
left Q M W w o n d e r i n g what had hit them.
ULU Six-A-Side Sunday 21 October , W i m b l e d o n , IC II
began their annua l p i lgr image to Motspur
Park for medals and g lory . IC's qualifying
group compr i sed C H X , R F H , Golds I and
U C II.
U C II p rov ided IC wi th an excellent
aperitif as IC w o n 1-0. M A b d o scor ing
the decisive goal and T Hulber t , the fish
l ike keeper, do ing what fish-like keepers
do best.
R F H p r o v e d a nasty p r a w n cockta i l : IC
wi th D Cook scor ing twice in a 2-1
v ic tory . Next on the menu was Golds I, a
team full of U L U players a n d tournament
favourites. H o w e v e r IC were very hungry
and devoured Golds I and spat out their
bones wi th contempt, w i t h goals from S
Watson and N L e o n a r d in a 2-0 w i n . IC
' wrapped up their group, against C H X , 2-0
w i t h S Bar ry scor ing twice.
The quarter f inal , against Kings II, was
w o n at a trot, S Ba r ry scor ing the winner
to set up a semi-final c lash w i t h Golds 1
w h o had s o m e h o w sneaked through v i a
the backdoor .
IC dished out a second he lp ing and
k n o c k e d them out of the tournament . D
Cook scored the winner w i t h N L e o n a r d
scor ing arguably the goal of the
tournament . IC had marched ' Imperiously '
into the final but, sadly, RCI ended their
dreams. Fortune was against IC as a
l u c k y goal , inspi red goa lkeeping and
fading light den ied IC the r eward their
play undoubtedly deserved.
It was a complete team effort.
14
Sailing
The Firef ly Class Inland Championsh ips
were held at the Wel sh H a r p last Sunday
(October 21). IC Sai l ing C lub entered two
boats into the event, notable for the ve ry
strong w i n d w h i c h resulted i n the
majority of competi tors gett ing a touch
damp. The first race unfortunately saw
one team go s w i m m i n g after ro l l ing a bit
too far whilst runn ing , and the other
near ly joined them, fi l l ing up their boat in
the process. In the afternoon the teams
general ly sa i led better, apart from a
comple te ly successful attempt by one of
our boats to r am one of the competi tors
by r icoche t ing off a motor launch, and
were eventua l ly r ewarded w i t h 13th and
16th place. A v ideo was made of the
Canoe So far this te rm, the Canoe Club has had
two trips.
The first w e e k e n d trip of the year
i nvo lved seven of last year 's members
going up to Swaledale in Nor th Y o r k s h i r e
to take part i n a chari ty paddle on behalf
of the Samaritans, M.S . , and Guide Dogs
for the B l i n d appeal .
A we l l organised event was rather
spoiled by the fact that it hasn't ra ined up
there for some t ime and there was no
water in the r iver . After the first day's
paddl ing and dragging of boats over
rocks, we dec ided to head for wetter
parts.
After a w i l d goose chase Nor th to the
River Tees w e ended up o n the R ive r
Ure , near R i p o n , compe t ing for a scrap of
r iver wi th a l l canoeists w h o ' d realised
that this was the on ly spot of whi te water
available in the area.
Last w e e k e n d we headed for Symond ' s
Cross Country The rest of London ' s students were but a
hedgehog in the path of the IC
steamroller at the first col leges ' league
match, held at Par l iament H i l l over five
miles. Strong men were m o v e d to tears
as the Imperial warr iors s w a r m e d over
the field to w i n the first d iv i s ion and gain
th i rd place in the second and ladies
divisions. Resplendent in all whi te w i th
Captain M a r v e l himself, Pau l Nor throp,
taking it by the scruff and runn ing away
wi th the ind iv idua l honours by a
considerable marg in . B e h i n d h i m a flank
of home talent had formed, w i th a
s tunning freshman performance from
Dave Johnstone landing h i m in third and
gaining v i c to ry over F r a n k Dudbr idge and
A l e x Gaske l l (5th and 8th) both of w h o m
returning wi th a vengeance from the
abyss of phys ica l injury. F o u r in the top
ten was the best performance by IC in
event w h i c h w e w i l l try to show later in
the term, possibly at the bonfire party on
N o v e m b e r 3.
O n the w e e k e n d of Oc tober 27 and 28,
the IC Sai l ing C lub entered a team into
the Foot T r o p h y , one of the major team
rac ing events in Br i ta in . The new squad
found itself s t ruggling against m u c h more
exper ienced teams, but. managed to ra l ly
itself for a resounding v i c to ry against the
Univers i ty of L o n d o n second team.
A l t h o u g h hard ly a br i l l iant result for us,
the chance to see some of the country 's
best teams in act ion should pay off in our
c o m i n g matches against other
universit ies.
Ya t in South Wales for the first of our
Freshers ' trips. W i t h warn ings of gales
and floods, we set off enthusiastically on
Fr iday evening .
The weekend ' s paddl ing consisted of a
leisurely paddle in the W y e Va l l ey ,
l o o k i ng at the scenery and hav ing the
oppor tuni ty to pract ice a few skills. There
was also the chance to p lay on the rapids
of the Ya t itself. The weather was great,
and a good t ime was had b y al l .
The Col lege club is p redominan t ly
whi te water, a n d we have a number of
exper ienced paddlers w h o are w i l l i ng to
teach beginners, or people who 've done
just a little bit. W e have p o o l sessions for
this, but a better w a y is to come on a
trip.
For further details contact Ke i th W i l s o n
(Physics 2), J o h n Kent (Life Sci 2), or
Mar t in Hi l lcoa t (Chem E n g 3).
l i v ing memory , and to r o u n d off the team
Car l Edwards grunted his w a y to 19th in
his first league race after six years at
Col lege. His infectious enthusiasm
extended into the second team; B i l l
Skailes, Dan M c Q u e e n , Ian Wi l l i ams and
J i m Watson a l l enjoyed massive
improvements on previous placings to
launch the B-team p romot ion challenge,
w i th Duncan O ' D e l l and D a v e Budgett
m a k i n g fine debut contr ibut ions. In the
women ' s section a savage wa r n i ng was
issued to the w o r l d as a full Imperial
team was f inal ly assembeld and attained
thi rd rank. Spearheading the posse was
Edwige Pitel w h o finished thi rd and
promised more ; He len Mac in tosh and K e r i
W a r d e n - O w e n , 10th and 20th, also
showed posi t ive attitude as they prepare
to represent U L in Japan.
Gui ldford next week.
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(Tel: 071-334-0088)
ON Monday, 5 November 1990
AT: 7:00 pm
IN: The Cumberland Hotel,
Marble Arch, London W1 Please apply by C V .
before 16 January 1991
London Paris Munich Boston Los Angeles
LETTERS Scribblers' Corner
Spotty Dear Sir,
First the reply , from Saleem Choudhery ,
to m y previous letter. 1 indicated that the
A r a b Nations were perhaps 400 hundred
years less mature cul tura l ly . It also
appears that they are less menta l ly
mature. In rep ly to the reply; what do
y o u think 'per capita ' means? If you ' re
going to invade our allies, and study at
our Universi t ies , perhaps y o u had better
learn our language.
But to this week ' s letter. What is the
RCS p lay ing at? Last year three guys
stood for President, al l three failed their
year. So this year to fill the vacated
space, they held some new elections! This
p roduced two candidates. One has lots of
exper ience, but is not yet registered, has
failed her year , and w i l l be in the RSM
having d ropped out of physics into
Mater ia l Science! The other guy is the
opposite; arrogant, no exper ience
What's O n A N UP-TO-THE-MINUTE EVENTS GUIDE.
FRIDAY Yacht Club Meeting 12.30pm
Huxley 413.
Rag Meeting 12.40pm
Union Lounge.
Friday Prayers 1.00pm
Southside Gym. See Islamic Society.
C.U. Prayer Meeting 5.00pm
413 Maths.
Christian Union Meeting 6.00pm
308 Computing.
Swimming 6.30pm
Sports Centre. New members always welcome
to join in fun fitness training.
Fencing Club Training 6.40pm
Club training.
Water Polo 7.30pm
Sports Centre. Come along and join in one of
the most physically demanding sports ever
inveted.
Southside Disco 8.30pm
Southside.
SATURDAY Boat Club 9.00pm
Putney Boathouse
Rag's Leukaemia Research
Pub Crawl 7.00pm
Meet in IC Union Snack Bar.
Kung Fu Club 4.30pm
Wu Shu Kwan in Southside Gym.
SUNDAY
Hacks whatsoever , got 80% and is just do ing it
for C V points! I'm not sure w h i c h one is
worse. N o w that the one i n the R S M has
got in , two out of three of the RCS exec
are in the R S M ! ! People in the RCS seem
to be either spotty idle failures or spotty
workahol ics .
I on ly saw the maths vo t ing station, but
it consisted of a b lack box , a hack, and a
chair . No one was encouraged to vote;
there was no sign, no 'hello have y o u
voted yet?' nothing. W o u l d y o u go up to
a hack and ask h i m what he was doing?
I'm not sure I'd want to k n o w . The RCS
compla in of apathy amongst their
students, but what about the hacks
themselves? It's no wonde r that none of
their elections are quorate; ie 300 people
(out of 1,500) have to vote for it to be
quorate so that it is a fair representation.
If it's not quorate it has to be ratified by
a U G M (which are never quorate
Sunday Service 10.00am
Anteroom Sherfield Building. See West London
Chaplaincy.
Catholic Chaplaincy 11.00am
53 Cromwell Road.
Wargames 1.00pm
UDH. A l l welcome.
Catholic Chaplaincy 11.00am
53 Cromwell Road.
Bike for Fresh Air 12.00pm
Battersea Park. Join the campaign for clean air
and better conditions for cycling in London.
Assemble at the British Genius Site in Battersea
Park. Food Music and Stalls. Ride to Trafalgar
Square at 2pm.
Kung Fu Club 4.30pm
Wu Shu Kwan in the Union Gym.
Boat Club 9.00pm
Putney Boathouse.
MONDAY RockSoc Meeting 12.30pm
Southside Upper Lounge. Come and hear the
latest (beer optional). A l l abnormalities
welcome.
Environment Soc 12.45pm
Mech Eng 703. British Antarctic Survey with
Dr Shanklin.
Basketball Club 5.30pm
Volleyball Court. Men's Team.
Keep Fit 5.30pm
Southside Gym.
Rock 'n' Roll Lessons 6.00pm
JCR. Intermediate.
Swimming 6.30pm
Sports Centre. New members always welcome
to join in fun fitness training.
Flesh Gordon 7.00pm
themselves) w h i c h only the hacks attend,
so it's no w o n d e r the hack w o n .
A m o n g s t the R C S general populat ion
the w o r d 'hack ' is used as an insult. It
donotes a b u n c h of self-perpetuating
degenerates. A n d it's hard ly surprising
w h e n the hacks count the vote. Before
y o u ment ion it M r Hack; who ' s to say
that members of staff aren't pro-hack? Is
it any wonde r that they have this image
if the elections are not w e l l publicised,
are subsequently not quorate, and then
ratified by an even smaller minori ty!!
Guilds is exce l len t ly run and very
popular . The President is top of her year,
the Vice-President is top 12. Perhaps this
is not a coinc idence . Most people at
Imperial are here to get a degree (except
for, apparent ly, the RCS hacks), and so
long as they think that be ing an RCS
hack means be ing spotty and fucking up
your degree none of them w i l l get
Union Lounge. IC Science Fiction Soc.
Rock n Roll 7.00pm
JCR. Beginners
Water Polo 7.30pm
Sports Centre. Come along and try one of the
most physically demanding sports.
Latin American 8.00pm
JCR. Beginners/Improvers
TUESDAY C.U. Prayer Meeting 8.30pm
Chaplain's Office
Riding Club Meeting..... 12.30pm
Southside Upper Lounge. Come and see how it
feels to have 16 hands between your legs.
Radio Modellers 12.30pm
Southside Lounge.
Cathsoc Mass 12.30pm
Mech Eng 702. Followed by lunch.
Sailing Club 12.30pm
Southside Lounge.
Radio Modellers 5.30pm
Student training workshop, Mech Eng.
Keep Fit 5.30pm
Southside Gym.
Amenesty International 5.30pm
Clubs Committee Room. Weekly meeting.
Social Ballroom 6.00pm
JCR. Beginners.
Judo 6.30pm
Union Gym.
Latin American 7.00pm
JCR. Bronze Medal Class.
OpSoc Rehearsal 7.30pm
Union Building. 'Kiss Me Kate'.
16
i nvo lved . W h i c h means more hack
elections, and more apathy. Catch 22.
C o m e on RCS. Fuck the hacks. E ve ryone
at Imperial is intel l igent but if you can
sort out your degree, y o u c a n be a good
President, as Miss M c C l a y proves .
Perhaps in the next e lect ion in
February the union w i l l publicise its o w n
elections, and encourage people to vote.
If the RCS students see that the elected
execut ive were vo ted in by , perhaps, half
the student body , they might have a little
more faith in their un ion .
If M r Briant had the exper ience then he
wou l d , in m y i r re levent op in ion , have
made an excel lent f igurehead, if on ly to
encourage others (perhaps less b ig
headed). I hope he sticks a round ti l l
February .
Yours, Athena.
PS. M a y b e a nuke could 'miss' Iraq and
hit the R C S U ?
Accurate
Quotes!
Dear Chris,
In reply to Ul tan McCar thy ' s letter of
26.10.90:
W h e n I wro te the art icle concern ing
Cec i l Pa rk inson I took great care in be ing
as accurate as possible; especial ly as far
as quotes were concerned (now that
students are poore r than ever I cannot
afford to be sued for l ibe l by the
WEDNESDAY Keep Fit 12.30pm
Southside Gym.
Cycling Training l.OOpm
Meet at Beit Arch .
Wargames l.OOpm
UDH. Al l welcome.
Micro Club Meeting 1.15pm
Top floor NW corner Union Building. Every
week.
ICSF Video Buy at HMV 1.30pm
Meet in Science Fiction Library.
Rowing Club 2.00pm
Putney Boathouse.
Basketball Club 7.30pm
Volleyball Court. Women's Team
Kung Fu Club 7.30pm
Union Gym. Wu Shu Kwan.
THURSDAY Fencing Training 11.30am
Intermediate & advanced coaching.
YHA Meeting 12.30pm
Southside Upper Lounge.
Postgrad Lunch 12.30pm
Chaplains Office (10 Princes Gardens). See
West London Chaplaincy.
Fencing Training 12.30pm
Beginners Training.
Fencing Training 1.30pm
General.
Gliding Club Meeting l.OOpm
Aero 266. Come and arrange a trial flight. A l l
newcomers welcome.
Keep Fit 5.30pm
Southside Gym
Midweek Service 5.30pm
Chaplains Office (10 Prince's Gardens). See
Conserva t ive Party). After m y article was
publ ished in F E L I X (on Oc tobe r 19) I
spoke to many people (ranging from
Conservat ive to normal), a l l of w h o m said
that the art icle was fair and accurate. I
therefore take strong objection to being
cal led a liar b y M r M c C a r t h y , who in a
subsequent letter to F E L I X states that he
was not even present to hear M r
Park inson speak. Ei ther he is psychic or
M r M c C a r t h y was told by one of his
rel iable and total ly unbiased ConSoc
friends (he neglected to ment ion that he
is the treasurer of ConSoc) that 1
misquoted M r Park inson .
If I d id misquote, I d id so complete ly
unintent ional ly . M r M c C a r t h y may like to
k n o w that in future F E L I X w i l l endeavour
(where possible) to keep tape recordings
in such situations to resolve any
subsequent differences of opin ion
be tween conce rned parties.
Last ly I w o u l d l ike to congratulate M r
M c C a r t h y in m a k i n g fun of the complete
lack of security dur ing M r Parkinson 's
visit; he may have s tumbled upon an anti-
terrorist po l icy that is m u c h more
effective than the government ' s present
one; let's l augh at serious lapses in
security and maybe the I R A won' t b low
us up. I think that M r McCar thy ' s attitude
in this matter shows a comple te lack of
sensitivity towards families w h o have lost
relatives in terrorist activit ies. Just one
example is the compara t ive ly recent
murder of Ian G o w M P . I'm sure that his
family w o u l d not find his letter all that
amusing.
Kaveh Guilanpour.
West London Chaplaincy.
Social Ballroom 6.00pm
JCR. intermediate.
Judo 6.30pm
Union Gym.
Social Ballroom 7.00pm
JCR. Beginners.
FilmSoc: Dead Poets Society 7.30pm
Mech Eng 220.
Latin American 8.00pm
JCR. Gold medal class.
Southside Disco 8.30pm
Southside.
ICCAG Soup Run 9.15pm
Meet Weeks Hall Basement to take food to
London's homeless.
Small Ads ADVERTISE HERE FOR FREE!
ANNOUNCEMENTS
• T H E FBI codeword is Finance for small
businesses. The contact is on Wednesday
November 7 at 12.45pm in Computing 144.
• EDWINA who?
• RIPSOC-can you dig it?
• COME and worship God! There will be a
short service of worship and prayer in Huxley
308 on Tuesday November 6 at 5.30pm.
Organised by the joing Christian societies of IC.
Al l welcome.
• T H E R E WILL be a blood donating session at
College on Tuesday Nov 13 in Southside Gym.
Sign up in the Guilds Office or in the JCR on
Next Time
LETTERS
Dear FELIX,
Murray ' s apologies accepted. But next
t ime someone in author i ty wants our
posters taken d o w n ask us. 1 w o u l d m u c h
rather take d o w n all icsf posters myself,
than have t hem r ipped d o w n and b inned .
W e then have to print more , wast ing
t ime, money and paper (which we waste
to m u c h of already).
A n d as for the other times w h e n the
w a l k w a y s have been c leared for no
apparent reason, I consider t hem as acts
of vanda l i sm. E v e n if the Col lege c leaning
staff are responsible.
Alex McLintock.
PUZZLED? Do you enjoy inventing logic and other puzzles? If you are interested then
please come into the FELIX office with your ideas.
Tuesday Nov 6.
• G U I L D S UGM—Fri Nov 2, 1pm in Mech Eng
220. Featuring elections for our new publicity
officer. Bring your Union card.
• RECORDS, CDs for sale-recent Wedding
Present, Inspirals, Cramps, Stephen Daintree
and other Reading Fest bands. Ring Sarah on
3515.
• IT'S JUST round the corner
I can hardly wait
To give on to my mum
• BEIT HALL—storage rooms being cleared of
items left prior Sept 1990. If not claimed by
Nov 2. Housekeeper.
• MISSING: If anyone has seen the runaway
piano from the ground floor of Sherfield, could
they please let us know where it is. The West
London Chaplaincy, ext 3035.
• W O U L D you like to join 700 students from
all over Europe for a huge New Year's Party in
Luxemburg. Contact Nick Manzi, Mech Eng 3
through the Mech Eng pigeonholes asap.
FOR SALE
• FREE software for Archemedes! Contact Alex
McLintock, DoC 2 for catalogue and info.
• K M D 100W valve head + home-made 4x12
£200, Axxeman guitar processor £150, all
hardly used, telephone 071-228 0187.
• LOW ENERGY light bulbs-save money and
help the world! £11.50 each. Ideal X-mas
present? Ring Clare Smith, Env Tech ext 7204.
• TOP QUALITY running shoes. Unused men's
size 10. Retail £57. Selling price £35. Contact
Steve Ansell, Env Tech, ext 7207.
• DEAR SIR, 1 am exercising my reich of reply
in response to
Tonight at S i l w o o d Park there is a grand
f i rework ex t ravaganza . This even ing
promises to be a good one, not on ly have
Ents laid on a few bangs and flashes,
there w i l l also be a disco, l ive music by
the band 'fetch', a free barbeque (once
y o u have pa id for your ticket!), and most
important ly , a late bar. T h e cost for such
a wonderful even ing is a mere £ 3 , tickets
avai lable from the U n i o n Office. If y o u
need a lift £2 w i l l buy y o u a return coach
ticket. The coaches are l eav ing at 5.30pm
from outside Beit Quad , re turn ing
sometime in the evening, t ickets must be
bought from the U n i o n before 1.00pm
today.
If y o u don't m a k e it to S i l w o o d there are
plenty of other displays in L o n d o n this
weekend:
S A T U R D A Y
Camden Primrose Hi l l . Bonfire l ight ing 7.15pm. F R E E
Ealing Southall Park. Bonfire l ight ing 8.00pm. F R E E
Ealing Cricket Club , Corston R d . Gates O p e n 6.30pm. £2
S U N D A Y
East Ham Central Park. Gates O p e n 5.30pm. £ 1 . 5 0
M O N D A Y - t h e 5th!
Battersea Park. Bonfire l ight ing 7.30pm. F R E E
Hammersmith Ravernscourt Park. Gates O p e n 6.00pm. £ 1 . 0 0
Kensington and Chelsea Maxil la Gardens. Gates O p e n 6.00pm. F R E E
Thames Barr ier (pier 7) at 10.15am - daylight fireworks!! F R E E
Wandsworth Battersea Park. Bonf i re l ight ing 7.30pm. F R E E
Westminster, C h u r c h of St.John and St.Michael. 6.30pm, w i t h Jazz. F R E E
List compi l ed courtesy of Capital Rad io
A T O T A L L Y F L E X I B L
Sooner or later, engineering graduates have to make a decision whether to stay dose to the technology that fascinates them and in which they have excelled so far, or whether to move out into management style functions which are perceived often quite rightly to be the most effective way up to the top.
In Schlumberger you don't have to make such black and white decisions.
| M A N U F A C T U R I N G
Schlumberger operates a policy of promotion from within which means that all senior managers (and we are talking about all the way up to the chairman) have come up from the graduate engineer level. While providing unsurpassed management opportunities for young engineers, our system of career development also means that employees are not pigeon holed or likely to experience one way tickets to support functions. A typical career in Schlumberger will lead in and out of technical, management, and support roles, broadening experience, providing a unique variety and building the strongest corporate management potential of tomorrow.
And while we are looking for the potential m our recruits to benefit from this philosophy, we do not compromise on engineering expertise. Which is why we are market leaders in our four mainstream activities and are continuing to invest in R&D with a commitment and confidence way beyond that of our competitors.
The Oilfield Services half of the Schlumberger group is recruiting Field Engineers to work all over the world in often isolated conditions and with irregular hours providing advice, expertise and specialised technical services to our clients. Such assignments require a high degree of initiative and give a huge amount of early responsibility. These field jobs lead after a period to management and staff positions. Moves are regular and development and training never stop
l#MMHM-| u o e o -
Schlumberger
The industrial half of the business comprises nine autonomous business units designing, developing and manufacturing a range of very high quality products using state-ot-the-art facilities. Our engineers work in small project teams that enjoy a great deal of operational independence. Graduates go straight into a productive role in such a team with training tailored to the individual by means of relevant courses. Careers may be developed in R&D, Production. Purchasing. Sales. Client Support to name but a few. In our relatively small business units, your achievements are quickly noticed and rapid career development will include movement between sites, across disciplines and overseas
If you would like further details, consult your careers department or contact us directly by calling Wendy Bailey on 0202 893535. Alternatively write to her at: Schlumberger Technologies, 23 Cobham Road, Ferndown Ind. Estate, Wimborne, Dorset BH21 7PP.
7777777? Schlumberger will be making a presentation on Tuesday 6th November at 6 pm. in the Sheffield Building's Ante Room, Everyone welcome, refreshments will be provided!
Manager's Bit Massive Typo!
I b o w m y head in shame for the
inclusion this week of a humungous
typographica l error. O n the back page in
big letters, the U G M is adver t ised as
happening on Tuesday 8 November . It
should of course read Thursday , before
y o u sharp eyed devils wri te me lots of
letters on the matter. A l so conta ined in
this issue is another typo of some
considerable amusement (well I thought it
was funny). No prizes but a pat on the
back if y o u can spot i t . . .and a slagging if
you find and tell me of a real ly mundane
one.
U L U G U C
W i t h their usual style and panache ICU
travel led to the U L U Genera l C o u n c i l this
week wi th var ious matters, heckles and
wi t ty retorts i n mind .
I was amused to hear of the verba l
tackl ing of the U L U V P (Services),
Desmond Qui l ty . W h e n speak ing about
the U L U A l l - N i g h t e r , he was asked by
Benjamin Turne r about the size of the
loss made on the night. Q u i c k as a flash
FELIX is produced for and on behalf of Imperial College
SW7 2BB (Tel: 071-225 8672). Manager: Chris Stapleton,
he returned the sharp b l o w of 'about two
grand less than yours did! ' Not
o v e r w h e l m e d by this apparent defeat,
Benjamin went on two consolidate his
stand by interrogat ing the V P further.
Regard ing the event he t ightened the
thumb screws and asked w h y the matter
had not been inc luded in his wri t ten
report. He was told that the report had
been pr inted before the matter had been
discussed by the Exec . W h y then, Benj
cont inued, had he not added it as a
ve rba l report. Desmond had no good
acerbic response to that one! and was
instructed that he should b r i n g the matter
up at the next meet ing. Nice one
Benjamin.
Box A d s and Collators
If anyone wishes to place box ads in
F E L I X they are most w e l c o m e to do so.
The arrangement is for the respective
people to organise some help for the
Thursday night col lat ion of F E L I X .
A l t e rna t ive ly the group can pay for the
advert isment or s imply settle for a free
Smal l A d or What 's O n inclus ion.
Union Publications Board, and is printed by the Imperial
Business Manager: Jeremy Burnell, Advertising Manager:
A box ad was put in last weeks issue
for the Chinese Society, for w h i c h a
m i n i m u m of three collators were
requested. O n e lonely chap turned up and
no blame on h im, but the rest of the
society owes me some w o r k (or money!).
If neither is for thcoming next week then
no ads of any k i n d w i l l be inc luded unti l l
their debt is repaid. Y o u have been
warned!
Credits:
Printer/Bandleader: A n d y Thompson .
Typesetter: Rose Atk ins .
News Editor: T o b y Jones.
Reviews Editor: A d a m T.
Music Editor: Sarah.
Features Editor: Ro land F lowerdew.
Science Editor: Ian Hodge .
Photography: R icha rd , K a v e h
Gui lanpour , D a n H o m o l k a and myself!
The Team: A d a m Har r ing ton , James
Grinter , Je remy, Richard , St .John Har ro ld ,
and H u g h Ea land .
The Collators: R ichard , Ian, James,
Toby , and A d a m . A n y b o d y else that turns
up w i l l get a credit next week .
College Union Print Unit, Prince Consort Road, London
Chris Adams. Copyright FELIX 1990. ISSN 1040-0711.
GETS TOTAL RESTyLE" PART 3...VfS, IT GOB ON...
FELIX FALLS TO THE FLOOR, THEN....
HE'DBECOM£...
A Lire s c i e N n s T !
OP UNTIL NOW FELIX HAD BEEN A SQOEAKy CLEAN, S M O G . P O R I N G , Is-r YEAR
PHYSICS LOOK-ALIKE, W H O
DRANK PEP5J, hit AT MCDONALDS , D I P N T GO TO
P A R T E S 'COS HE HAP TO WORK,
LISTENED TO KYL/F , DJU/VY
SMOKE (ANYTHING;, AWP
THOUGHT RO0OCOP W A S FAR
100 VIOLENT.
PILL THAT WAS PBOVT
TO CHANGE. . . .
WHAT HAS HAPPfNfP TO P£LIX ? WILL HE BE OKAY? IS HE (GULP) DEAD ? IF 50, WHAT THE HELL DO I P0
FOR NEXT WEEK? ANP WHY 90 f ALWAYS £7VP OP WITH THESE SILLY QUESTIONS If Y00 KNOW THE ANSWER'S, PLEASE TELL THE AbTHOR. *
NEX.TI5H: FELIX DISCOVERS THE EASY WAY ro GO our WITH A
BEAUTIFUL W O M A N A T 1 C .
!*IAT H i w t j w ' r TELL v o u . . . HUH))
?
y
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P u a s e N o t e " - The A u t n o r i s o w a r e t h a t j o m t r e a d e r s m a t )
b e o f f e n d e d , bvj t h e p o i - r r a y n l o f hi V - Physicists in t h i ' s
S t ' l p , a n d 50 w o u l d U B e t o p o i n t o u t t h a t t h i s is for t h £
f o l l o w i ' n q reasons: (oO I + ' s t r w t . J O ) T h e j d e s e r v e i t .
% Answers o n a p o s t c a r d to A S F .
c/o The ftUx Office- 5 e s t Ons iver g e t s
UNION
President —Paul Shanley
CYCLE CODING Monday 5th to
Tuesday 6th November 10am-4pm
Anteroom—Main
Dining Hall
Have a coded serial
number stamped on
YOUR crank shaft.
CYCLES &
CARS For Remembrance Service
F r o m 7am Fr iday 9th to Sunday
evening , cars, b icycles and
motorcycles w i l l be R E M O V E D by the
Pol ice from A L L roads and publ ic
areas a round the R o y a l A l b e r t Ha l l .
This includes Pr ince Consor t Road and
parts of E x h i b i t i on Road and
Queensgate.
The U G M on N o v e m b e r 8 w i l l n o w be
held at the m a i n Kens ington site, at 1pm
in the Great H a l l . The main i tem of
debate revolves a round proposed changes
to the Col lege day.
A W o r k i n g Party, on w h i c h 1 sit, has
been set up to make recommendat ions .
These w i l l p robab ly inc lude one or more
of the fo l lowing .
• Start ing the day earlier
• F in i sh ing the day late
• Lengthen ing the lunch hour
• M o v i n g the l unch hour
• H o l d i n g an even ing session
Some suggestions are m o r e probable than
others—the most l ike ly one is to ex tend
the day to finish at 6 .30pm.
In order to report back to the W o r k i n g
Par ty in t ime for its next meet ing on
N o v e m b e r 9, I need feedback from
everyone at the U G M .
It is possible that these changes may be
implemented next term—it thus affects
everyone . Please turn up a n d voice your
op in ion .
3—Ots
Stand up and be counted
UNION GENERAL MEETING
Tuesday 8 November 1.00pm Great Hall
To be discussed: • Changes to the College day
*Use of Harlington Gravel money ^Merger of ICU and Mary's Union
BE THERE!!