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Is there a tradition you love, or something you saw at a wedding that made you think,'never at mine'!

Is the ceremony the heart of your celebration, or is it something you have to do so you

can get to the party?"

Find an Officiant You Connect To.

The officiant plays a huge role in your ceremony. Try to find someone with whom youconnect. If you don't already have a relationship with a pastor or officiant, don't feelpressured to choose someone just because of their title.

Acknowledge the Past, Present, and Future.

All weddings give thanks for the past, celebrate the present, and honor the future," saysReynolds. "It's an affirmation of who the couple is at this moment in time, as well as whothey want to become individually and as a couple. It's both that simple and that profound."

Make the ceremony relevant to you.

You won't remember what was said five years from now, but you remember the tone andhow the ceremony made you feel. When done well, you and your guests should leaveyour ceremony feeling refreshed and ready to celebrate your love."

Exchange of Rings.

The highlight of the ceremony is the exchange of rings. If you don't have bridesmaids orgroomsmen, ask someone who has a meaningful connection to the two of you, such asyour parents, your children, I have even received rings from the couples dog. It is an honorto present the rings and be able to extend their love and blessing.

Ceremony VibeHow to get the exact ceremony you want

Make your wedding relevant to you!

Choose Music That Means Something to You.Music is highly personal. Think about the tone you want to set for the ceremony and thenchoose music that amplifies that tone. You will need 3 pieces for sure. One for theProcession (coming down the isle), one when signing the legal documents (keeps it frombeing awkward) and one for the recessional (leave the front as a married couple) Usemusic in the body of the ceremony to accompany some other action, such as a unity ritual,or a moment honoring your families.

Don't Include Things Just to Fill Up Time. Avoid clutter. Everything you include in your ceremony should be in service of highlightingthe two of you and your relationship.

Do you want to include Your Guests in the Ceremony?

Instead of a single reader, ask multiple guests to participate by dividing the reading intoshorter segments. You could also keep them seated, scattered throughout the rows ofguests, to surround your guests with the feeling of community.

Include Unity Rituals.

There are many unity ceremony ideas that you can include. Consider taking it one stepfurther: Amplify the emotion of a Unity ritual by asking your parents, your wedding party,or all of your guests to participate. Get creative. Doing a Wine box? Have your family andguests add their letters to the box. Doing a Sand ceremony? As people arrive, have smallvials of sand that each guest can pour into your vessel, then you can added your differentcolors during the ceremony, supported by the love of your friends and family. Always putthis in the context of family, and urge the couple to take the best of the people who lovethem and use that to create a home that is a safe haven. Use the Unity Ceremony as anopportunity to remind the couples of the love and support of the people they care about.

Include Traditions that are important to you.

"Something Olde, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue, A Sixpence inyour Shoe". This old time rhyme names the four good-luck objects (plus a sixpence) abride should include somewhere in her wedding outfit or carry with her on her weddingday. These itms were specifically meant to ward off "the evil eye"!

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Rev. Carol Surbey is a Spiritualist Minister in Prince George, BC, Canada who hasbeen performing weddings since 2017.