HELP FOR CHILDREN FROM DYSFUNCTIONAL HOMES
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Transcript of HELP FOR CHILDREN FROM DYSFUNCTIONAL HOMES
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HELP FOR CHILDREN FROM DYSFUNCTIONAL HOMES
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It’s a family that doesn’t satisfy the necessities of its members,
nor promote the integral development of each one.
WHAT IS A “DYSFUNCTIONAL” HOME?
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In a Dysfunctional Home…First, the parents don’t fulfill their own roles as
parents; they’re not healthy & happy.
Thus, the kids are aloof/stunted in their own growth, as parents haven’t encouraged & modeled typical development & behaviors.
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WHAT IS THE PROFILE OF A “DYSFUNCTIONAL HOME?”
Before we look at the profile of a dysfunctional home, let’s look at
the profile of FUNCTIONAL home.
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*Family relationships are clearly established and are positive for all the members.*The family dynamics permit for development of a personal identity and autonomy for all its members.
PROFILE OF A FUNCTIONAL HOME:
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*Favoritism, partiality, and “unspoken alliances” don’t exist. * Family limits are clear, and everyone is secure within them. Roles are clearly defined. *There’s a process for communication and conflict resolution that is clear and permits quick restoration of members.
PROFILE OF A FUNCTIONAL HOME…
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* There is empathy. * There is emotional support. * Family members are able to recognize & resolve personal issues through open, clear, and direct conversations.
PROFILE OF A FUNCTIONAL HOME…
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SO WHAT’S THE PROFILE OF A DYSFUNCTIONAL HOME?
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IN THE DYSFUNCTIONAL HOME…
* There is little regard given to the feelings and opinions of others.* Generally, these people are psychologically rigid, bossy, critical, and easily discouraged.
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IN THE DYSFUNCTIONAL HOME… ?¿
• There is no “reconciliatory attitude”* There’s a climate of DENIAL.
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IN THE DYSFUNCTIONAL HOME…
* No one knows how to openly discuss problems that come up in the family. If problems reoccur, the method is to deny or “stuff” the problems.*There is disorder and confusion in each person’s individual roles.
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IN THE DYSFUNCTIONAL HOME…
* Limits are not respected.
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PARENTAL CHARACTERISTICS OF DYSFUNCTIONAL HOMES
-Parents may be married, separated/divorced, but raised in dysfunctional homes themselves.-Parents don’t fulfill the role properly; many times
single parents become dictators.-Parents don’t permit proper development of their children to individuate, become their own person.
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PARENTAL CHARACTERISTICS OF A DYSFUNCTIONAL HOME -Their homes are characterized by an infinite number of rules and inflexible norms.- These dysfunctional parents don’t communicate, they MANDATE.
- One or both parents explode on the child or treat him as if s/he were a possession.
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HOW DO WE DESCRIBE A CHILD FROM A
DYSFUNCTIONAL HOME?
Children from these types of homes have difficulty developing emotionally and socially.
There are 3 rules that permeate and dominate dysfunctional homes. They infiltrate and mold the minds of these children. What are they?
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THE 3 RULES IN A DYSFUNCTIONAL HOME ARE:
THE 3 RULES: DON’T SPEAKDON’T FEEL
DON’T TRUST
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CHILDREN FROM DYSFUNCTIONAL HOMES…
TEND to adopt certain “roles” of how to function with others.
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THE “ROLES” A DYSFUNCTIONAL CHILD
LEARNS ARE:
-The “good or perfect” child. -The “black sheep” or problem
child.
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ANOTHER ROLE A CHILD LEARNS…
• BE A PEACE-MAKER-& DON’T “ROCK THE BOAT”
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LASTLY…A CHILD FROM A DYSFUNCTIONAL HOME
LEARNS:
• TRY TO WIN LOVE & APPROVAL BY SUCCEEDING IN SCHOOL
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?¿ SO HOW CAN WE HELP THESE STUDENTS?
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AS TEACHERS, LET’S LOOK AT SOME GENERAL PRINCIPLES…
PRINCIPLE 1It is the parents’ responsibility to form their child’s personality, NOT YOURS.
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GENERAL PRINCIPLES-CONTINUED
PRINCIPLE 2: OUR JOB IS TO PROVIDE ACADEMIC
EDUCATION.
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GENERAL PRINCIPLES-CONT’D. ?PRINCIPLE 3:
AS EDUCATORS, WE STILL MUST REMEMBER WE HAVE AN
INFLUENCE ON OUR STUDENTS & WE SHOULD BE GOOD EXAMPLES
IN WORD, DEED, & LIFESTYLE.
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GENERAL PRINCIPLES – CONT’D.
PRINCIPLE 4 “YOUR ACTIONS & ATTITUDES SPEAK
LOUDER THAN YOUR WORDS.”
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GENERAL PRINCIPLES – CONT’D.
PRINCIPLE 5 SAY WHAT YOU MEAN AND MEAN
WHAT YOU SAY.
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GENERAL PRINCIPLES- CONT’D.
PRINCIPLE 6 The teacher’s personal and emotional
maturity is CRUCIAL the moment a dysfunctional student is provoked or
tempted to “meltdown” publicly.
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A FEW LAST PRINCIPLES…cont’d: ?¿PRINCIPLE 7-9-The teacher is a facilitator of learning, not a “jack of all trades.”- Encourage the student to see a school counselor or psychologist.- Teacher’s goal should be to enlist parents as stakeholders for their child’s wellbeing AND academic success.
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A TEACHER SHOULD KNOW…
…when to speak…when to not give advice…
…when to listen.
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With all you do in teaching, remember the following…
KNOWING & APPLYING
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* Encourage the art of active, involved listening. * Accept one another’s differences, viewpoints, and faults, without passing judgment. * CELEBRATE each person’s individuality!
YOU MUST STRIVE TO:
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* Demonstrate and encourage interactive lessons one with another.
* Plan, encourage, & enjoy sharing and working together! * Encourage honesty and sincerity among students and teachers.
KNOW & APPLY…lastly,
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References
• Lamar, S., & Gatfield, T. (2007). The early impact program: An early intervention and prevention program for children and families at-risk of conduct problems. Journal of Early and Intensive Behavior Intervention, 4(4), 703-713.
• Kayfitz, A.D., Gragg, M.N. & Orr, R. (2010). Positive experiences of mothers and fathers of children with autism. Journal of Applied Research in Intellectual Disabilities, 23(4), 337-343.
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References-Cont’d
• Samms, G. (2012). Causes and effects of the dysfunctional family. Retrieved January 10, 2012 at: http://www.elium.com/items/849180-causes-and-effects-of-the-dysfunctional-family/print.
• Suarez, Gonzalo. (2011). Ayuda real a ninos que vienen de hogares disfuncionales. Presented at Conferencia Internacional para Educadores, 12 march 2011. Quito,Ecuador.
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References – Cont’d.
• Sugbu, L. (2012). Causes and effects of the dysfunctional family. Retrieved from Helium, Inc. on January 15, 2012 at: http://www.elium.com/items/.../print.