Funeral Components & Etiquette

INTRODUCTION TO SYMPATHY UNIT

SYMPATHY TERMINOLOGY

• Autopsy: It is medical examination performed at the hospital by a pathologist in order to determine the cause of

death. This is usually done when a death is sudden, unexpected or unexplained.

• Burial: The lowering of a casket into the earth. It continues to be the form of disposition many families prefer• Casket Biers: A stationary stand where the casket is

placed, usually for the viewing of the deceased at the funeral chapel/home.

• Church Truck/Casket Truck: A four-wheeled carriage that the casket can be placed on so that it is easily moved

in the church or funeral chapel.• Cremains: A coined term used for cremated remains, but

no such term really exists—the correct term is cremated remains.

TERMINOLOGY

• Cremation: The process of reducing the body into a few pounds of small skeletal fragments by the use of extreme heat over a few hours. The skeletal fragments are mechanically processed to create a fine powder. The cremated remains can be buried, placed in a memorial niche, or kept in some other location, such as the home.

• Eulogy: A tribute, honoring the life of the deceased, delivered by a family member, close friend, or clergy.

• Mausoleum: An above ground structure where the casket and deceased are placed. It is an alternative to burial.

TERMINOLOGY

• Viewing/Visitation: A time when family and friends can gather to see the deceased.

• Visitation Room, Reposing Room, Viewing Room, or Slumber Room: A room in the funeral home where the casket is placed so family and friends may pay their respects to the deceased.

• Bereavement: the state of sorrow or loss over a loved one. It is part of the mourning process.

• Casket Saddle: plastic form used to hold absorbent floral foam and flowers on top of a casket.

TERMINOLOGY

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• Mechanics: supplies, methods and materials used by floral designers to hold flowers and foliage in an arrangement.

• Obituary: short, published notice of a person’s death

• Stateroom: large bereavement arrangement made in absorbent floral foam; also called a sympathy tribute or sympathy basket.

• Memorial Arrangement: floral arrangement made of silk or other permanent floral materials and taken to a gravesite

TERMINOLOGY

• Cemetery: land used for the burial of the deceased

• Open Casket: top of a casket is half open

• Closed Casket: entire casket is closed

TERMINOLOGY

COMMON FUNERAL ETIQUETTE QUESTIONS &

INFORMATION

• Upon learning of a death, intimate friends of the family should visit the home to offer sympathy and ask if they can help.

• You may prefer to visit the family at the funeral home. This setting may be more comfortable for you and the family, as they are prepared for visitors.

WHEN SHOULD I VISIT?

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Most funerals have three events, The Visitation or Wake, The Funeral or

Memorial Service, and the Burial. Generally speaking, the number of people

who are considered obliged to attend each of these three rituals by etiquette

decreases at each step:

• Distant relatives and acquaintances may be called upon to attend the visitation.

• The decedent's closer relatives and local friends attend the funeral or

memorial service, and subsequent burial (if it is held immediately after the memorial service).

• If the burial is on a day other than the funeral, only the descendant's closest

relatives and friends attend the burial service (although if the burial service

immediately follows the funeral, all attendees of the memorial service are

asked to attend).

WHICH OF THE RITUALS SHOULD I ATTEND?

• It's quite common for a visitation (sometimes called a wake) to be held during

the day or two days prior to a funeral.• A formal visitation provides a time and place for mourners to

offer their expressions of sorrow and sympathy, and a chance to say goodbye to their loved one, while gathering together for support.

• This practice is most common among the Protestant and Catholic faiths.

• Most people appreciate the chance to attend a visitation. • It can provide a sense of closure or acceptance to those who

have lost someone. • A visitation can be either public or private, so if you're

organizing one you'll have to be clear about your expectations for family, friends and acquaintances.

THE VISITATION OR WAKE

• Funeral services differ depending upon the religious and personal beliefs of the

family. • Funeral services can be held at a church,

temple, funeral home, or even the residence.

• Most people will choose the funeral home, because of its centralized location.

THE FUNERAL OR MEMORIAL SERVICE

• Get to the church or funeral home at least 15 to 20 minutes prior to when you're expecting the service to start.

• If you happen to arrive late, you should quietly enter the service and take a place in the back row.

• Make sure to draw as little attention to yourself as possible.

WHEN SHOULD I ARRIVE AT THE FUNERAL?

• Immediately after the funeral, the family sometimes invites the attendees to join them for food or a reception at their home or designated place.

• This gives everyone a chance to talk and provides some time to relax and refresh.

• Sometimes friends or church members will take it upon themselves to prepare food ahead of time for this gathering, and relieve the family of this task.

THE CONCLUSION OF THE BURIAL OR SERVICE