14 CHICAGO READER | JANUARY 27, 2006 | SECTION ONE

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What Can YouDo With 8,000Plastic Soldiers?Sallie Gratch hopes she can make people talk about the war.By Kabir Hamid

S allie Gratch was on a mission.She walked into FlowersFlowers, a floral shop in

Evanston, gave a quick wave to thecashier, and made her way over to thetulips sitting in the storefront win-dow. As she leaned in for a closerlook she dipped into her purse andpulled out a two-inch green toy sol-dier, gun raised and at the ready, andplanted it beside a flowerpot. Shewandered around the store for a fewmore minutes, nonchalantly pokingat the other plants, then saunteredback over to the window and quicklyplaced another soldier on the ledge.

Gratch, a 70-year-old retired socialworker, leaves her house in Evanstoneach day with four or five Ziploc bagsfull of the little green men. On thebase of each one is a label printedwith the words BRING ME HOME. Sheleaves them wherever she goes—supermarkets, bookstores, coffeeshops—and even gives away bags tofriendly looking strangers. Gratchhas gone through more than 8,000 ofthe toys since she started passingthem out in September.

“These soldiers are an incrediblebonding tool,” she says. “In this worldof ours where we all keep so closed toothers, this provides an opening forpeople to begin to talk.” One time, forexample, she left a soldier in a restau-rant in Coal City, Illinois. “The wait-ress picked it up,” she says. “And I

heard her go back and talk to someother people. She said, ‘Will you lookat this? What do you suppose they’retalking about?’ And they were figur-ing the whole thing out, and it reallyprompted a conversation. Theyweren’t sure if this was the Iraq war—‘Is there another war going on thatwe don’t know about?’ So it is aboutpeople stopping. It doesn’t matterhow they understand what it means.”

The project was started in early2005 by Merry Conway and KattLissard, members of a New York-based political action collective called

Mouths Wide Open. “Lots of menhave had a really strong responsewhen they see [the soldiers], becauseit reminds them of being kids,” saysConway. “It reminds them of whenthey loved soldiering, when they hadall sorts of romantic notions about it.And you can see in their eyes thiskind of shuddering, of flashes of thepast meeting the present.” The phrase“bring me home” is intended to besimilarly resonant. “There could havebeen much more strong or literalmessages,” says Conway. “But we wentfor the one that was the most evoca-

tive, because we really thought that itopened conversation and wouldengage a relationship, rather thanjust ‘I’m telling you what I think.’”

Gratch overheard Conway talkingabout the idea during a performanceat the Brooklyn Academy of Musiclast March, and struck up a conver-sation with her to find out more.Back home she went to the collec-tive’s Web site, mouthswideopen.org,to order soldiers and downloadlabels, but felt nervous about provid-ing her credit card information

[snip] Bush legacy watch. From David Charter, writing in the Times of London: “The unprecedentednumber of troops who are returning from Iraq with missing limbs has given the US Paralympic Teaman unexpected recruitment boost and the chance to become ‘unbeatable’ at the next Games inBeijing in 2008. More than 60 potential recruits have already been identified in sports as varied aspowerlifting, archery and table tennis.” —Harold Henderson | hhenderson@chicagoreader.comOur Town

Sallie Gratch, toy soldiers at Thee Fish Bowl and Pick a Cup Coffee Club in Evanston

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An Afternoonto Wage PeaceWHEN Sun 1/29, 2-5 PMWHERE JewishReconstructionistCongregation, 303 Dodge,EvanstonINFO nsawc.org

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Our Town

online. She sent an e-mail sayingshe’d send a check instead but didn’thear back until the summer, whenshe got an apologetic reply fromConway, who promised to ship asmany soldiers as she wanted, free ofcharge. Gratch asked for four gross—that’s 576—and soon began leavingthem everywhere.

Political activism was nothing newto Gratch. She’d been involved in thenuclear disarmament movement inthe 80s, participating in cross-coun-try marches in both the U.S. and theSoviet Union, and was arrested twicefor trespassing on government prop-erty while demonstrating againstnuclear testing in Mercury, Nevada.She’s also the founder of ProjectKesher, a nonprofit devoted to issueslike domestic violence, sex traffick-ing, and women’s political involve-ment in Russia, Ukraine, Moldova,Belarus, and Georgia. But the sol-diers had a more immediate appeal.“Sometimes these global things makeyou feel like you’re just all aboutideas, and not about really doing,”she says. “And these little soldiersgave me something to really do.”

When she’d run through that initialshipment Gratch took matters intoher own hands. “I thought, this iscrazy, I can get them here,” she says.“So I went around to all the toy storesand I said, ‘Who supplies your toy sol-diers? Let me get in touch with them.’And here I am, a social worker. Whatam I getting obsessed with these toysoldiers for?” Toys Etc. in Evanstonput her in touch with their supplier,Best Toys in Lisle, and she called themto ask for a free sample. “I didn’t wantto get a bunch of strange-looking sol-diers,” she says. “Merry’s group had asoldier lying down, and there was noplace to put the label. Such detail!

That’s when you know you’re going alittle crazy.” Gratch eventuallyordered 12 gross, then another 40—nearly 7,500 toy soldiers altogether,at a total cost of $90.

Hoping to get the new shipmentready for the High Holidays, Gratchwent to her synagogue, the JewishReconstructionist Congregation, andasked for help with the labeling andbagging. By Rosh Hashanah she and ateam of 40 had put together about600 bags. “Wshht—they all went likethat,” says Gratch. “It was amazing,just amazing.” A man at the syna-gogue told his wife, an editor atWBEZ, about the project, and inNovember Gratch was profiled byChicago Public Radio reporter CatrinEinhorn. Later that month she wasfeatured on NPR’s Day to Day. Afterthe broadcast, she says, her e-mail in-box was flooded with sympatheticmessages from across the country.“Some of the e-mails drove me totears,” she says, “because it was peopleexpressing how they finally could dosomething.” Some had even begunconstructing their own versions of thesoldiers. “They were making theirown labels, my god!” she exclaims.“Handwriting them. They didn’t thinkof the sticky stuff. And they were sta-pling them to little soldiers. But whatit demonstrated was the determina-tion people had out there to bring thetroops home, to stop this craziness.”

Gratch has just ordered another 40gross for “An Afternoon to WagePeace,” which will be held Sunday ather synagogue in Evanston and issponsored by the North ShoreAntiwar Coalition. She plans to fill atin bucket with 2,500 unlabeled sol-diers as a symbol of the number ofcoalition troops who’ve died in Iraq.She did have to go through a newsupplier, Oriental Trading Company,

for this batch because she andConway had both been told theirprevious outlets had run out. At onepoint they began to suspect thatsome cabal was sabotaging theirefforts. “We actually got a little para-noid for a while there,” Gratch says.

Handing out soldiers is “the gentlestkind of peace activism” Gratch saysshe’s ever done, but she thinks that’sthe key to its effectiveness. One of herfriends, Happie Datt, says she thoughtgoing to war was the wrong choice,but doesn’t consider herself the typeto “get up on rooftops and shout outhow you feel about things.” So Gratchencouraged her to take a bag and tryleaving a soldier someplace. Soonafter, while out shopping with herdaughter, Datt decided to do just that.“We were at Banana Republic or J.Crew or one of those stores,” she says.“So when it came time to sign out, Itook a soldier and I put it on thecounter. I felt very brave doing it.”

“Probably two weeks later I got ane-mail from her,” says Gratch. “Shewas excited. She felt like she had bro-ken down this wall, and she was nowable to say, ‘I’ve done my first antiwaraction.’ And she was empowered.” v

Public Displays

Now That’sEdutainmentA turtle that breathes onceevery half hour—and theman whose job it is tomake you care.By Jessica Hopper

Rusty Reed is a bit disappointedin how little Chicagoans knowabout turtles. “People keep say-

ing they’ve never seen a turtle likeCrunch,” he says, “but there was aneven bigger one at the Brookfield Zoofor 45 years!” Reed is the owner ofCrunch, a creamy green, 165-poundalligator snapping turtle who is overfour feet long and somewherebetween 150 and 200 years old.Crunch is in town as one of the hotattractions at the 2006 ChicagolandOutdoor Show in Rosemont, wherehe’s sitting motionless on the rocks atthe bottom of his illuminated travelaquarium. Three men with mus-taches, obviously coworkers, pass byholding plastic beer cups on their wayto the animal-jerky mega booth

What Are You Wearing?

E leanor Balson plays music, teaches yoga, and runs her own children’sentertainment company, making balloon animals, painting faces, and

occasionally dressing as the Sugar Plum Fairy. She’s about to move to SanFrancisco; her final performance as the techno-noise act Soft Serve isJanuary 28 at Heaven Gallery, and her final appearance with Lovely LittleGirls, a performance-art band she drums in, is January 30 at Schubas (seethe Treatment in Section 3).

Where did you get the hot-pink mesh shirt?I collect fishnet. Any time I see fishnet I get it.

It’s kinda slutty.Well, I’m kinda slutty. I saw a 70-year-old lady at the mini putt-putt inLincolnwood and she had on fishnets and big blond hair and she looked sexy.You can expose your entire leg and feel completely confident because allthe Xs cancel out any flaws you have. Everyone’s the same under fishnets.

What about exposing yourself makes you more self-confident?I want to be spontaneous and unafraid to say the wrong thing or to lookugly or to appear stupid. When I was a child, at the school I went to boyswould always take off their shirts and run around and play and the girlscould too. It just feels good. You feel more like an animal.

That’s an interesting way of looking at it.A couple days ago my friends had me over so they could show me thesecheesy, terrifying Diana Ross, Trina, and Vanity 6 videos. I thought, here aresome amazing women and they’re not going crazy trying to synchronize allthese instruments or do everything themselves and show how prolific andstrong and competitive they are. They were just allowing themselves to bethemselves, to be openly sexual. I used to think that was a crime.

Why?I always resented women that didn’t seem like they were doing anything.But now the music I try to make is always over my head. Everything isalways fucked-up. I can practice it really good at home but when I’m performing shit’s either broken or I can’t remember what I was doing orthe sound is off. So when I wore this outfit [for a Soft Serve performanceon January 18] I decided I just wanted to have a strong presence. . . . I onlydid what I really know how to do, really stripped-down, simple stuff.Mostly what I did was just stand up on an amp and sing to people. Andsometimes I’d stop singing and just flap my arms.

How did that feel?For the first time I put aside the feeling of being nervous, the feeling of “I hope they like me.” Instead I just gave this little thing that I have, just a simple thing that’s really natural and kind of retarded. I gave sweetness.It felt so good because there were a lot of people looking back at me andsmiling, instead of trying to figure out what’s going on.

What did you learn from your performance?I learned that if you like to set yourself apart you don’t have to be com-petitive about it. Be happy that you’ve done something unique. Just revelin knowing you had the energy to do it. —Liz Armstrong

Full-Body FishnetEleanor Balson

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Soldier with a message

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[snip] It’s not a conversation if only one side has to give up its assumptions.Georgetown University Press just released Anglican bishop Kenneth Cragg’s new book, TheQur’an and the West, and the press’s blurb reads: “Cragg argues that the West must putaside a ‘spiritual imperialism’ that draws on western prescripts alien to Muslims and ‘learnto come within’ Islam. Only then can a conversation begin that can relieve the misunder-standings and suspicion that have grown between Islam and the West since 9/11.” —HH

around the corner. Noticing Crunch,one of the men teases his friend: “Hey,you’re just like that turtle!” The otherman, laughing, joins in: “Yeah, it takesyou three hours to paint the line!”

Reed runs the Blackwater TurtleRefuge in Churubusco, Indiana, asmall town near Fort Wayne. He usedto have over 60 turtles but is nowdown to four, having sold most ofthem to zoos over the last few years.He purchased Crunch in 1989 from aman who had rescued him from acannery ten years before. The largestfreshwater turtles in North America,alligator snappers were hunted fortheir meat and brought to the brinkof extinction by the 1970s. Todaythey’re a protected species in theirnative states, and Reed spends fiveweeks a year on tour with Crunch topromote conservation efforts.

But Reed is more than Crunch’skeeper: he’s his hype man. He switch-es off his headset mike and explainshis strategy. “It’s a studied statistic atzoos: people only look at each exhibitfor 11 seconds,” he says with a smirk.“Lions, tigers, whatever—only 11 sec-onds. So, now, the shock value ofCrunch may lure people in—youknow, some people have never seen aturtle like this—and my job is to addthe entertainment value. My job is touse that minute to let them knowthat this turtle is amazing. You gottabe in their face, because if you getthem listening, they will stay arounduntil you are done talking.

“You know, [America] doesn’t haveelephants roaming around,” he adds,“but we do have the largest freshwa-ter turtles in the world.”

Just then Reed overhears a littleboy asking his father if the turtle isdead, and springs into action.Turning his mike back on, heannounces that Crunch only movesto come up for air every 24 to 30minutes. If they want to stickaround, he assures, the turtle will beup for a breath in a couple minutes.

Then he checks his watch. “I makesure never to say ‘last breath,’” Reedsays with his microphone still on,“but he last came up at 3:46, so hecould breathe again anytime now.”

Two high school seniors, NickOlsen and Andrew Grzelak ofDeerfield, decided to wait around forCrunch to surface. They’re both avidfishermen and decided to hit the out-door show after they finished examsearlier in the day. “I’ve never seen aturtle like this—it’s awesome,” saidGrzelak, who was entranced. “I’m notleaving till he breathes.”

Six minutes later the faithful arerewarded: Crunch, using his frontclaws and tail, lifts himself towardthe surface very slowly. Poking hisnostrils up so gently they don’t evenmake a ripple on the surface, he takesa breath, then returns to his previousspot at the bottom of the aquarium.

Reed switches off the headsetagain. “See, somebody’s gotta do thetalking,” he says, laughing. “He’s a lit-tle boring otherwise.” v

[snip] Double standard. Veteran local conservative commentator Tom Roeserwrites in his blog that Kathy Salvi, a Republican candidate for Congress fromthe northwest suburbs, ought to drop out of politics because “a mother shouldbe home with her kids; gender roles are not switchable.” Funny, I don’t remem-ber him condemning welfare-to-work programs on those grounds. —HH

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Rusty Reed and his 165-pound alligator snapping turtle, CrunchA

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