Issue 001November 3016

FELINE PEACE

IN SPORTS: NO MESS CHESS

FEATURE STORY: BICYCLES

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The Enormous Chess Championship returns with 24 contenders, 12 planets, one galaxy. Broadcats details amid Pay-Per-View Cancellation announced. Final match venue and championship duration listed. Season tickets available for bookings.

City Council under the supervision of Mayor Gillian announces campaign launch for riding bicycles as an alternate to hover cars for transporation for numerous reasons and the campaign starting next month derives nonprofit organizations to promote donations through riding bicycles. Audience response documented in the past few days, mixed feedback available.

‘STUPID CUPID’

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Internaional story coverage on King Xavier, the ever-young immortal only remaining Turkish Angora Cat who is the face of the planets emblems as the World Peace creator and ambassador. Celebrations for this 5001st birthday and museum opening announcement.

National story coverage on Cupid’s padlock movement trial has been locked, locally referred by ‘Stupid Cupid’.Verdict and appeal informaion as well as crowd reaction covered 250 years later.

VIPTON TODAY

Vipton Publication HousePO Box 111, Postal Code 222, Planet Sarooch

Editor-in-chief Maryam A. Rehman

www.viptontoday.comeditor@viptontoday.com

Issue 001, November 3016 VIPTON TODAY2

King Xavier Turns 5001 And World Peace Remains

“Everyone owes their life today to our cherished Royal feline friend King Xavier and thus he must be worshipped and celebrated at all times” - Mayor Gillian.

Written by Maryam A. Rehman; Photography by Maryam’s Clone

Audio Classifieds Serenated, call: 1-800-SALE Xavier, the ever-young immortal cat that is behind world peace in our Vipton galaxy’s region turns 5001 years today. Dubbed the handsomest cat alive; he is the only surviving cat from his extinct breed Turkish Angora once plentiful in number in then flourished planet earth from the neighboring galaxy. The infamous cat came to be the reason behind world peace ever since the day he was the cause behind a war not being waged where just when Planet Cyro warriors were about to throw in their laser tagged axes against Planet Covu soldiers’ freeze blasts, Xavier calmly walked and stood in the middle and everyone stopped to pet him, and amends were made. He has contributed to keeping over 9000 wars from erupting and singlehandedly achieved world peace for the region. Today, in honor of his 5001th birthday, the galaxy’s Council of All Affairs has declared every planet’s official emblem to have a hologram of Xavier. All 12 planets; Cyro, Covu, Jobu, Kalib, Lopi, Ratishk, Nuvinchk, Sarooch, Bajink, Olympusiko, Itichikin and Wootland will commemorate in live simultaneous reveal of their emblems in a unionized broadcast above their towers. A grand tour opening will be held for the launch of All Lives Xavier museum on November 27th to showcase his story which will cover his early years, escape from clinical trials on planet earth, rescue mission by group of local humans, his transition into immortality, journey into outskirts to Vipton galaxy and current residential premises in his home planet Jobu where the museum is built. Special appearance will be organized for first three days of the opening, guests have been advised to sign up to the limited seating arena with tokens of treats for donations as an entry ticket. A three-day rally will also be organized to celebrate the occasion and events will be held in every planet for a week to mark the occasion. (Planet Soochi Reporter)

Xavier, the ever-young immortal cat that is behind world peace in our Vipton galaxy’s region turns 5001 years today. Dubbed the handsomest cat alive; he is the only surviving cat from his extinct breed Turkish Angora once plentiful in number in then flourished planet earth from the neighboring galaxy. The infamous cat came to be the reason behind world peace ever since the day he was the cause behind a war not being waged where just when Planet Cyro warriors were about to throw in their laser tagged axes against Planet Covu soldiers’ freeze blasts, Xavier calmly walked and stood in the middle and everyone stopped to pet him, and amends were made. He has contributed to keeping over 9000 wars from erupting and singlehandedly achieved world peace for the region. Today, in honor of his 5001th birthday, the galaxy’s Council of All Affairs has declared every planet’s official emblem to have a hologram of Xavier. All 12 planets; Cyro, Covu, Jobu, Kalib, Lopi, Ratishk, Nuvinchk, Sarooch, Bajink, Olympusiko, Itichikin and Wootland will commemorate in live simultaneous reveal of their emblems in a unionized broadcast above their towers. A grand tour opening will be held for the launch of All Lives Xavier museum on November 27th to showcase his story which will cover his early years, escape from clinical trials on planet earth, rescue mission by group of local humans, his transition into immortality, journey into outskirts to Vipton galaxy and current residential premises in his home planet Jobu where the museum is built. Special appearance will be organized for first three days of the opening, guests have been advised to sign up to the limited seating arena with tokens of treats for donations as an entry ticket. A three-day rally will also be organized to celebrate the occasion and events will be held in every planet for a week to mark the occasion. (Planet Cyro Correspondent)

Xavier, the ever-young immortal cat that is behind world peace in our Vipton galaxy’s region turns 5001 years today. Dubbed the handsomest cat alive; he is the only surviving cat from his extinct breed Turkish Angora once plentiful in number in then flourished planet earth from the neighboring galaxy. The infamous cat came to be the reason behind world peace ever since the day he was the cause behind a war not being waged where just when Planet Cyro warriors were about to throw in their laser tagged axes against Planet Covu soldiers’ freeze blasts, Xavier calmly walked and stood in the middle and everyone stopped to pet him, and amends were made. He has contributed to keeping over 9000 wars from erupting and singlehandedly achieved world peace for the region. Today, in honor of his 5001th birthday, the galaxy’s Council of All Affairs has declared every planet’s official emblem to have a hologram of Xavier. All 12 planets; Cyro, Covu, Jobu, Kalib, Lopi, Ratishk, Nuvinchk, Sarooch, Bajink, Olympusiko, Itichikin and Wootland will commemorate in live simultaneous reveal of their emblems in a unionized broadcast above their towers. A grand tour opening will be held for the launch of All Lives Xavier museum on November 27th to showcase his story which will cover his early years, escape from clinical trials on planet earth, rescue mission by group of local humans, his transition into immortality, journey into outskirts to Vipton galaxy and current residential premises in his home planet Jobu where the museum is built. Special appearance will be organized for first three days of the opening, guests have been advised to sign up to the limited seating arena with tokens of treats for donations as an entry ticket. A three-day rally will also be organized to celebrate the occasion and events will be held in every planet for a week to mark the occasion. (Planet Jobu Reporter)

To learn more about Xavuer and have a virtual tour of the museum to be opened, kindly visit our homepage www.viptontoday.com for free and get a limited select-ed tour of the museum.

Xavier During Clinical Trials On Earth

Issue 001, November 3016VIPTON TODAY 3

Audio Classifieds Serenated, call: 1-800-SALE

Audio Classifieds Serenated, call: 1-800-SALE

To learn more about Xavuer and have a virtual tour of the museum to be opened, kindly visit our homepage www.viptontoday.com for free and get a limited select-ed tour of the museum.

To learn more about Xavuer and have a virtual tour of the museum to be opened, kindly visit our homepage www.viptontoday.com for free and get a limited select-ed tour of the museum.

Xavier Safe At Residence Once Upon A Time Ago On Earth

Xavier, the ever-young immortal cat that is behind world peace in our Vipton galaxy’s region turns 5001 years today. Dubbed the handsomest cat alive; he is the only surviving cat from his extinct breed Turkish Angora once plentiful in number in then flourished planet earth from the neighboring galaxy. The infamous cat came to be the reason behind world peace ever since the day he was the cause behind a war not being waged where just when Planet Cyro warriors were about to throw in their laser tagged axes against Planet Covu soldiers’ freeze blasts, Xavier calmly walked and stood in the middle and everyone stopped to pet him, and amends were made. He has contributed to keeping over 9000 wars from erupting and singlehandedly achieved world peace for the region. Today, in honor of his 5001th birthday, the galaxy’s Council of All Affairs has declared every planet’s official emblem to have a hologram of Xavier. All 12 planets; Cyro, Covu, Jobu, Kalib, Lopi, Ratishk, Nuvinchk, Sarooch, Bajink, Olympusiko, Itichikin and Wootland will commemorate in live simultaneous reveal of their emblems in a unionized broadcast above their towers. A grand tour opening will be held for the launch of All Lives Xavier museum on November 27th to showcase his story which will cover his early years, escape from clinical trials on planet earth, rescue mission by group of local humans, his transition into immortality, journey into outskirts to Vipton galaxy and current residential premises in his home planet Jobu where the museum is built. Special appearance will be organized for first three days of the opening, guests have been advised to sign up to the limited seating arena with tokens of treats for donations as an entry ticket. A three-day rally will also be organized to celebrate the occasion and events will be held in every planet for a week to mark the occasion. (Planet Wootland Reporter)

Xavier, the ever-young immortal cat that is behind world peace in our Vipton galaxy’s region turns 5001 years today. Dubbed the handsomest cat alive; he is the only surviving cat from his extinct breed Turkish Angora once plentiful in number in then flourished planet earth from the neighboring galaxy. The infamous cat came to be the reason behind world peace ever since the day he was the cause behind a war not being waged where just when Planet Cyro warriors were about to throw in their laser tagged axes against Planet Covu soldiers’ freeze blasts, Xavier calmly walked and stood in the middle and everyone stopped to pet him, and amends were made. He has contributed to keeping over 9000 wars from erupting and singlehandedly achieved world peace for the region. Today, in honor of his 5001th birthday, the galaxy’s Council of All Affairs has declared every planet’s official emblem to have a hologram of Xavier. All 12 planets; Cyro, Covu, Jobu, Kalib, Lopi, Ratishk, Nuvinchk, Sarooch, Bajink, Olympusiko, Itichikin and Wootland will commemorate in live simultaneous reveal of their emblems in a unionized broadcast above their towers. A grand tour opening will be held for the launch of All Lives Xavier museum on November 27th to showcase his story which will cover his early years, escape from clinical trials on planet earth, rescue mission by group of local humans, his transition into immortality, journey into outskirts to Vipton galaxy and current residential premises in his home planet Jobu where the museum is built. Special appearance will be organized for first three days of the opening, guests have been advised to sign up to the limited seating arena with tokens of treats for donations as an entry ticket. A three-day rally will also be organized to celebrate the occasion and events will be held in every planet for a week to mark the occasion. (Planet Bajink Correspondent)

Xavier, the ever-young immortal cat that is behind world peace in our Vipton galaxy’s region turns 5001 years today. Dubbed the handsomest cat alive; he is the only surviving cat from his extinct breed Turkish Angora once plentiful in number in then flourished planet earth from the neighboring galaxy. The infamous cat came to be the reason behind world peace ever since the day he was the cause behind a war not being waged where just when Planet Cyro warriors were about to throw in their laser tagged axes against Planet Covu soldiers’ freeze blasts, Xavier calmly walked and stood in the middle and everyone stopped to pet him, and amends were made. He has contributed to keeping over 9000 wars from erupting and singlehandedly achieved world peace for the region. Today, in honor of his 5001th birthday, the galaxy’s Council of All Affairs has declared every planet’s official emblem to have a hologram of Xavier. All 12 planets; Cyro, Covu, Jobu, Kalib, Lopi, Ratishk, Nuvinchk, Sarooch, Bajink, Olympusiko, Itichikin and Wootland will commemorate in live simultaneous reveal of their emblems in a unionized broadcast above their towers. A grand tour opening will be held for the launch of All Lives Xavier museum on November 27th to showcase his story which will cover his early years, escape from clinical trials on planet earth, rescue mission by group of local humans, his transition into immortality, journey into outskirts to Vipton galaxy and current residential premises in his home planet Jobu where the museum is built. Special appearance will be organized for first three days of the opening, guests have been advised to sign up to the limited seating arena with tokens of treats for donations as an entry ticket. A three-day rally will also be organized to celebrate the occasion and events will be held in every planet for a week to mark the occasion. (Planet Ratishk)

All Hail Xavier, Our King and Savior - Official Anthem Slogan For All Planets Approved by Council of All Affairs

Issue 001, November 3016 VIPTON TODAY4

Cupid in stone.

Woe is Cupid

Written by Maryam A. RehmanPhotography by Maryam’s Clone

n the bizarre trial of Cupid here in Sarooch, a verdict has been called. Cupid has been sentenced to turn into stone for two thousand years as a punishment after being indicted of being the one behind starting the padlock movement on the main bridge of planet’s gateway. The movement which had been a traditional practice in earth during modern ages; is banned in majority of Vipton galaxy due to no guarantee of said relationships lasting forever. It has been said Cupid started the movement falsely to encourage other love infected individuals to start a wave in the region, much of the controversy surrounds the matter as ‘love’ has been

classified as a disease in most planets enforcing limited public display of affection with the exception of Planet Ratishk where Cupid had sought exile. The trial came to an end after 250 years with an ongoing petition calling for Cupid’s freedom and reversal of the classification on ‘love’. The petition fell short of one signature just hours before the verdict being announced to the region. The defense team keeps arguing what led Cupid to rebel was simply not finding love himself and fear of love being eradicated due to his missing arrows’ which were stolen by allegedly a bitter man. An appeal may be presented to the judiciary but, irrespective of any future results, Cupid will have to serve at least one thousand years in stone in the form of a live sculpture. There have been many protests held across all planets given that ‘love’ is in fact practiced openly

and to all extents, much of the trouble falls upon laws that cannot be changed unless another billion years pass before new ones can be put into place. The petition aims to change that completely altogether calling for immediate abolishment. Cupid’s arrows remain missing. The arena will be open to the public throughout the week for six hours per day for viewing Cupid in ‘sculpture’. (Soochi Special Correspondent)

Be up to date with any new events and find your own soulmate via downloadable App now available on: “Where’s Cupid and Where’s My Soulmate?” View On E-Paper For Free

National Story on High Profile Trial Case

Issue 001, November 3016VIPTON TODAY 5

GetFitMonthly Expert Opinion Column On All Things Fitness

Written by Maryam A. Rehman

Quick guide to the perfect bodyFind someone who already has one, mimmic everything they do!

Eat 1000000 bananans a day2000000 jumping Jacks

400000 sit ups

Walk for a million years

Jog for a hundred

Sleep 80 hours a day

Practice meditation

Become a Jedi

Fight a bear in Virtual Reality

Race an actual Cheetah

Lose quitter jtters

Believe in yourself

Lift mountains for weight

Swim to Mars and back

Trust me

- Expert Opinion

Enormous Chess Championship

The Annual Championship Returns With Promising New Venue for Final Match Set to Astonish Crowd

Written by Maryam A. Rehman; Photography by Maryam’s Clone

In sports, the official 44th Enormous Chess Championship begins next week on December 2nd; running strongly after its revival from planet earth where it never made it into the Olympics. 24 number of champions have been announced with returning reigning champ Coco Pop who is the youngest toddler to compete. He represents planet Olympusiko (named after its many successful competing athletes) along with unidentical twins; Vikki and Nikki, Solaris, Lex and from Planet Kalib Atlab and Polly, Planet Wootland with a singular champion in representation Max, Planet Lopi with Chip and Chase, Planet Itichikin with Biv, Walt, and Fischer, Planet Nuvinchk with Carter, Florence and Jeremiah and for a record breaking number of representations hosting Planet Cyro with eight competing champions Jo, Jojo, Joji, Joba, Lance, Alex, Ash and Lexa. Planet Cyro won the bid after producing a short clip of all eight champions presenting a choregraphed match with the official anthem song for the championship which won over popular vote among the region’s audience. The Championship is known for its fierce

competing rules of getting harder by each qualifying stage with the finalists expected to win within 0000.1 seconds in the last match. Certain bonus awards will be added this year for best checkmate celebratory move and personal sprays will be allowed to carry for post win decorative move by the competitors. The Championship will be aired across the region for free after Pay-Per-View was cancelled early on this year, marking this year’s championship the first to be aired for free which is expected to make the championship even more popular among crowds. The final match will take place under the newly unveiled underwater arena with fish free to roam and special suits for those who do not have gills to assist them with breathing. The Championship duration will also be extended to two months. (All Things Sports Agency - Planet Olympusiko)

Voting Polls are now live, highlight your champion below for results tomorrow:-

*Who Will Be Our Next Enormous Chess Champion:-

1. Coco Pop from Planet Olympusiko2. Vikki from Planet Olympusiko3. Nikki from Planet Olympusiko4. Solaris from Planet Olympusiko5. Lex from Planet Olympusiko6. Atlab from Planet Kalib7. Polly from Planet Kalib8. Max from Planet Wootland9. Chip from Planet Lopi10. Chase from Planet Lopi11. Biv from Planet Itichkin12. Walt from Planet Itichkin13. Fischer from Planet Itichkin14. Carter from Planet Nuvinchk15. Florence from Planet Nuvinchk16. Jeremiah from Planet Nuvinchk17. Jo from Planet Cyro18. Jojo from Planet Cyro19. Joji from Planet Cyro20. Joba from Planet Cyro21. Lance from Planet Cyro22. Alex from Planet Cyro23. Ash from Planet Cyro24. Lexa from Planet Cyro

For more information on each Champion, please visit our downloadable E-Paper for free on www.viptontoday.com

A traditional bicycle parked.

Hello,Bicycle

Written by Maryam A. RehmanPhotography by Maryam’s Clone

A campaign is set to launch next month till the upcoming spring season encouraging citizens to get back on bicycles and avoid driving hovering cars for transportation but, rather adopt cycling and learn to be ‘down to earth’ and humble by doing so. As well as an initiative to consume less energy from hovering cars. Bicycles were once upon a time the most popular choice of transportation; outranking vehicles and motorbikes. Posters have been hung all around the city in preparations for the campaign, one reads “Ride a bicycle, say hello to a bystander who could be your neighbor Tom from 2030” where another reads “Fix your bicycle, Stop Reminiscing and Live the Nostalgia Today” and multiple ones in every other corner reading “Save energy, burn some calories”. In order to boost efforts for the success of the campaign, several free bicycles have been provided to be picked up off the rails. In recent years only, the elderly has been seen riding bicycles across with the addition of a few young children who go out in pairs with their grandparents. Institutes have opened their doors for teaching how to ride a bicycle offering packages suitable for individuals and families alike and special offers are also available for any membership sign up. Air pump stations in maintenance centers are also going to make a comeback to ensure nobody faces issues in taking care of their bicycles. Every participating citizen will receive a badge of participation and an aisle with their name in their respectful hometowns. Old school traditional bicycles will be available as well as customized per request with different features are also going to be available from the main bicycle factory “Bicycles in Cycles”. The mayor in town; Gillian is quite fond of bicycles and a big-time advocate who is at the head of the campaign has mentioned plans for an entire island where only bicycles will be allowed to be used for transportation and no other means will be permitted. The island

will in fact be shaped like a bicycle; aerial photos will be released by the press during a press conference scheduled a day before the campaign launch. Audience reaction has been with mixed feelings; some were positive whereas others negative calling for the sense of being pressured into not driving their hover cars and some have a long way to commute and do not want to slow down their rushed lives for cycling across town. The city council has also announced camera drones will be taking footage for a time-lapse video broadcast after the campaign is over to document number of participants and activity across the city which will be part of an in preview for any new residents to witness some of the activities around the city. The campaign aims to have at least half the city household with two bicycles in their garage. Innovators are given a task to come up with different bicycle parts for new road functions such as gears for shift in slope or inflatable tires for over water crossing as well as easily detachable tires that could be turned into a grill for when taken on a hike or camping trip. The scope of the campaign is highlighting the need for a big wave of cyclists to emerge in the city and keep it a habitual practice for transportation as technology is more and more advancing to keep people in solitude rather than actively present in the society as a community. The mayor believes it is the right tool to bring people back together stating: “Bicycles are meant to be part of our lifecycle in every stage”. A special award has also been announced for the first citizen to get a million miles on their bicycle mileage within a year where they will receive a bicycle made entirely of gold with studded diamonds on the handlebars upon crossing that milestone. Some have called it outrageous but, many people are preparing for the task by mapping out the galaxy and set across on the journey. Plenty have been seen practicing in the streets traveling state to state. Strict guidelines are always to be followed such as wearing safety helmet and fluorescent clothing for nighttime riding. Some nonprofit organizations are also organizing “Pedal for a cause” movements by setting up “Rent a Bike” station charging

per hour and all proceeds will be donated to goodwill. Lack of participants will result in mandatory implication thus all citizens are encouraged to partake willingly, a disclaimer has to be noted in all promotional means.

For the complete article with vouchers to redeem for gifts, please visit www.viptontoday.com for free now.

Editor’s note:

pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal

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pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal

Please ride your bicycle today

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Today’s feature story is on transportation and campaigning.Read below (Obviously)

Bicycles are meant to be part of our lifecycle in every stage - Mayor Gillian

VIPTON TODAYIssue 001November 301611/25/3016

Universal PublicationDay One | Number Infinitewww.viptontoday.com

Reporters: Almost Every PlanetPhotographers: Maryam’s Clone | Design:Clone Again | Supervising producer: Another Clone | Editor: Maryam A. Rehman | Distribution: Planet Okay Distribution