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Dilisa V. TownsendMrs. J. HillEnglish Comp. I1 December 2004

My Family’s Idea of Personal Achievement: Then and Now

This is one of the papers I dread writing because it is a comparison of my children

and me. My idea of personal achievement is different for each of us that now reside in

my home. My grandmother, who was my caregiver, had her own idea of personal

achievement. In some ways I have taken the ideals I was raised with and adapted them to

my children. I too have had to adapt them for me now that I am in college.

One thing I can remember from childhood is how my grandmother never read

anything. As a child, I had no opinion of this behavior. As an adult, I am surprised I

have the love of reading that I do. In so many ways my grandmother was the only role

model I followed. The lack of reading in my home shows me some behaviors can be

learned. I also don’t remember my grandmother ever putting any pressure on me to do

 better in my studies. A small part of me feels she did not understand the love of learning

I showed. Don’t get me wrong. I was not an A student, but I liked finding out new

things. In my home there was a monetary value put on my grades. An A was $5. A B

was $4. A C was $3. I don’t ever remember having to do more or be the best. I felt

comfortable in the place I had found for myself.

My boys, on the other hand, have me breathing down their necks all the time. I

know I do not handle their grades well, but I am learning. It matters to me that my

children have as much knowledge they can fit into their brains. It is worth my time to

figure out a way to get them excited about learning. I do feel I put pressure on them. The

main reason I pressure them is because they have been labeled “slow learners” by the

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school system. What I know of this label is not positive at all. In my mind, there should

 be something I can do that will flip a switch in their brains that will get them into the

mode of learning and loving it.

Grades are not always a factor I use when I approach the boys. The notes

teachers write do factor in our discussions. Very often I have found myself just trying to

understand why this letter grade was given. Effort, in my estimation, is a large amount of 

the learning process. Follow through has been a problem for both boys for far too long.

 Never in a million years would I have thought I would have to over motivate any child of 

mine into the learning process. It’s funny the preconceived ideals we try to inflict on our 

children.

In conclusion, I would like to say, though I was not held accountable for the

grades I received, I am holding my children accountable for theirs. There may be a better 

way of doing this. As a matter of fact, I know there has to be a better way. My children

will begin getting home schooled next grading period. I do this with the hope of finding

what motivates each of my children individually. I pray they understand my ranting and

raving is not about the grade, but the lack of effort they show.