7/28/2019 "Employ All Monsters!" (Godzilla movie marathon)

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Employ All Monsters!By Frank LoveceGodzilla has just been sighted!For further reports, stay tunedto your TV-specifically theSciFi Channel.That's where, in an annualritual not unlike the swallowscoming back to Capistrano, the giant nuclear-mutant dinosaur returns for a week of mirthand mayhem-including a letterbox version ofthat all-star creature feature Destroy AllMonsters, the only classic 'Zilla not on homevideo. lt opens the fest Monday, Aug. 25th, 9-11 p.m. ET, followed on successive nights by1 p.m. ET, followed on successive nights byGodzilla on Monster lsland (a.k.a. Godzilla vs. Gigan), Godzilla vs.lledorg (letterboxed, a.k.a. Godzilla vs. the Smog Monster), and

current features:Glory of GodzillaThe Making of MysteryScience Theater 3000Stargate SG-7: RichardDean AndersonSoldiers On

Godzilla vs. the Cosmic Monster (a.k.a. Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla).Hmm (a.k.a. hmmmm). We get the impression our favorite childhoodmatinee mauler has had a long and confusing journey from the1954 Japanese original, Gojira, which was reedited with newRaymond Burr footage as-1956's Americanized Godzilla, King of theMonsters. There was nothing funny or campy about either veision ofthat first film: lt was a dramatic sci-fi suspense-thriller with a serioustheme about the consequences not just of nuclear arms, but ofscience operating in a moral vacuum. The atomic bomb-whichspawned Godzilla and in real life gave the world a doomsdayweapon-was created as some marvel of theoretical physics, withappallingly little reflection on its long-term consequences. Only later,when Toho Studios began'aiming the series at younger viewers,.didthe destructive and unpredictable force of nature that was Godzillabecome (unlike The Bomb) a good-guy defender of Earth.Godzilla would again become a savage metaphor-given-form withthe sixteenth film, Godzilla 1985. But in the mid-1960s and '70s,Godzilla movies were low-budget kids'fare. And in the U.S. at thattime, children's films got no respect-even Disney was in a creativeand commercial void. The Godzilla films were distributed here bysmall, sometimes shady companies that would repackage, recutand retitle to make the films.appear new-or, sometimes, just toavoid lawsuits. rTake the case of Gojira tai Mechagohira (Japan 1974).lt arrivedhere quietly in 1977, playing in theaters regionally as Godzilla vs.The Bionic Monster. That wasn't quiet enough for MCA/Universal,

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7/28/2019 "Employ All Monsters!" (Godzilla movie marathon)

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producer of TV's The Six Million Dollar Man and The Bionic Woman.Universal threatened to sue over the title, and though the case may''have been without merit-there was a bionic monster in the film,and Lee Majors hardly looked like Godzilla (not then, anyway)-asmall distributor couldn't afford to fight Universal in court. "Bionic"was changed to "Cosmic," and later, for video, the title became atranslation of the original: Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla. But sinceToho put out a new one using that title in 1993 (not released here),having the current TV title as Godzilla vs. The Cosmic Monsterhelps avoid confusion.And for all that, the movie's travails didn't come close to ending theseries. Not like Godzilla vs. Hedora (1972) almost did.That happened after the death in 1970 of Eiji Tsuburaya-thespecial-effects wizard who with his staff created all those classicimages of stomping monsters, collapsing towers, exploding fueltanks and entire cities ablaze. That put the "pollution-is-bad" opGojira tai Hedora (Japan 1971) in the hands of hischosen successor, Teruyoshi Nakano. With seriesexecutive producer Tomoyuki Tanaka laid low byillness, Nakano and fledgling director YoshimitsuBanno had a hippie-dippy field day, as anyonewho's seen the trippy psychedelic fish-head shotsor sung along to the saccharine theme song "Savetestify."Tanaka," recalled Nakano in a magazine interview, "washospitalized while we were filming the movie. He was much olderand more restrained than Mr. Banno and l, so we were kind ofhappy to be able to make the movie freely. We decided to go for it.But after he returned from the hospital, Mr. Tanaka saw the movieand he wasn't pleased. He told Mr. Banno, 'You ruined the Godzillaseries.' Godzilla vs. The Smog Monster was Mr. Banno's first andlast movie as a director."

Not that Mr. Nakano was always blameless:Hedora was able to take flight by, well, releasingposterior bursts of noxious gas. That's right-it'sexactly what you think. And consider Nakano'sfollow-up qon9te1, Gigan-often derided as-aroruffi giarit ccj'smic chicken. As the titular costar ofGodzilla tai Gigan (Japan 1972, released here as Godzilla onMonster Is;land. 1977\. Gioan heloed make that flick what evenonster ), Giigan helped make that flick what even the

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cult-film bible Psychotronic called "probably the worst Godzillamovie."Yeah, but it does have Godzilla and his monster sometime-sidekickAngilas talkingl How you gonna beat that? ln the Japanese original,their two brief exchanges (along the lines of "Something funny goingon. You'd better check") were printed within word balloons. But inthe U.S.'version, we actually hear them grumbling like two grumpyold men. (And we can sort of see Walter Matthau playing an olderGodzilla.) But kids get it: Said nine-year-old Vincent Lovece,logically,."They're speaking in monstdf sounds. We're just hearingthe translation." '