Commas, Conjunctions, and a Million Dollars

Commas after Introductory Elements

Write into the Lesson

What are your thoughts on grammar instruction? How do you teach grammar? Do you enjoy it? Why or why not?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5fPLtuqjCc

Writing Next (Graham and Perin 2007) summarizes current research on composition instruction.Grammar instruction in the studies reviewed involved the explicit and systematic teaching of the parts of speech and the structure of sentences. The meta-analysis found an effect for this type of instruction for students across a full range of ability, but surprisingly, this effect was negative…Such findings raise serious questions about some educators’ enthusiasm for traditional grammar instruction as a focus of writing instruction for adolescents. (21)

What does work?

A recent study (Fearn and Farnan 2005) found that teaching students to focus on function and practical application of grammar within the context of writing (versus teaching grammar as an independent activity) produced strong and positive effects on students’ writing. Overall, the findings on grammar instruction suggest that, although teaching grammar is important, alternative procedures…are more effective than traditional approaches for improving the quality of students’ writing. (Writing Next)

Goals

• Experience the interweaving of editing, grammar, and writer’s craft using Jeff Anderson’s methods as shared in books.

• Discover delight and surprise in the process of editing.

Who knew?

“The writer will also discover surprises in the process of editing, and the writer should delight in them.”--Don Murray, A Writer Teaches Writing (2003)

“I invite students to notice, to read like writers, to come into the world of editing—a friendly place rather than a punishing place, a creational facility rather than a correctional one. When we develop a place where concepts can be developed and patterns can be learned, kids feel safe, take risks, and feel welcome in every stage of the writing process.

“I invite students into editing rather than shutting them out of it. This invitational philosophy undergirds the everyday editing lessons in this book.”

• Invitation to notice

• Invitation to imitate

• Invitation to celebrate

• Invitation to collect

• Invitation to write

• Invitation to combine

• Invitation to edit

Invitation to Notice

If this were a movie, I’d probably have to kill off my father in the first scene. --Paul Acampora, Defining Dulcie (2006)

If this were a movie, I’d probably have to kill off my father in the first scene.

Probe beyond “What do you notice?”

Craft:

• What’s working with the text?

• What’s effective?

• Where’s the good writing?

• What else?

If this were a movie, I’d probably have to kill off my father in the first scene.

Probe beyond “What do you notice?”

Punctuation:

• What’s the punctuation doing?

• What effect does the punctuation have on my reading aloud?

• What changes if we remove it? Use something else?

• What’s the writer accomplishing with his or her choices?

• What else?

Invitation to Imitate

• If this were a movie, I’d probably have to kill off my father in the first scene.

• If my life is a movie, I hope it has a happy ending. (Colleen’s imitation)

• If my dad were a TV star, he’d be Ward Cleaver. He always had to help you see everything about your mistakes. (Jeff’s imitation)

Inviting students to imitate:

• Deconstruct the sentence for its prominent features.

• Show an imitation of your own or a student’s and connect back to the prominent features.

• Show students how to insert their ideas and experiences and still imitate the structure.

Invitation to Celebrate

Invitation to Collect

• Search writing that students have already read.

• When students find a sentence, they write it down in their writer’s notebook.

More Noticing

When she took Amy’s hand, she was startled by how damp it felt.--Scott Smith, The Ruins

When the web is finished, the spider waits for insects to fly into its web.--Seymour Simon, Spiders

Before the players begin drills, they must warm up properly.--Jeff Savage, Play-by-Play Football

When an AAAWWUBBIS is the first word of a sentence, it causes a comma; AAAWWUBBIS’s are regular comma causers. If a sentence starts with an AAAWWUBBIS, you are probably going to need a comma somewhere in the sentence.

Invitation to Write

Invitation to WriteWhen I was little, the world didn’t seem as complicated as it does now.When I was little, my brother attempted to run away to Texas but got caught up asking for directions.When I was little, I took off my shirt in the heat and tried to act like Daddy, but Mom got on to me.When I was little, I rode my dogs like trained stallions.When I was little, I rode the dragon that lived under my porch.When I was little, I counted to infinity twice.When I was little, my daddy and I would dance together.When I was little, I hated nap time, but now I want it back.When I was little, I was the center of attention.

Invitation to Combine

Uncombine the following sentences from Criss Cross (Perkins 2005) to make as many sentences as possible:

• As if to welcome them, a half-dozen lights on tall poles flickered to life.

• Because his burden of garbage was large and precarious, he could not look down at the path and had to go by the feel of dirt under his sneakers.

• If Rowanne said something important, something he need to know, he didn’t want to miss it.

Invitation to Combine

Combine the following sentences from Criss Cross. Use an AAAWWUBBIS word.

He ate dinner.Then he headed out to see Phil.Phil was at his house.

Hector put on his shirt.Hector slung the guitar over his shoulder.The guitar belonged to him.Hector was surprised at how well he had turned out.Rowanne was surprised at how well he had turned out.

The Original Sentence

After he ate dinner, he headed out to Phil’s house. When Hector put on his shirt and slung his guitar over his shoulder, he and Rowanne were both surprised at how well he had turned out.

Invitation to Edit: How’d They Do It?

When the web is finished, the spider waits for insects to fly into its web. --Seymour Simon, Spiders (2003)

Invitation to Edit: How’d They Do It?

When the web is finished, the spider waits for insects to fly into its web. --Seymour Simon, Spiders (2003)

When the web is finished, the spider waits for insects to fly into it’s web.

Invitation to Edit: How’d They Do It?

When the web is finished, the spider waits for insects to fly into its web. --Seymour Simon, Spiders (2003)

When the web is finished, the spider wait for insects to fly into its web.

Invitation to Edit: How’d They Do It?

When the web is finished, the spider waits for insects to fly into its web. --Seymour Simon, Spiders (2003)

When the web is finished the spider waits for insects to fly into its web.

Invitation to Edit: How’d They Do It?

When the web is finished, the spider waits for insects to fly into its web. --Seymour Simon, Spiders (2003)

The spider waits for insects to fly into its web when the web is finished.

Extending the Invitation

When I was young, I got lost in my favorite bouncy ball pit.I got lost in my favorite bouncy ball pit when I was young.

When I was three, my sister tried to suffocate me.My sister tried to suffocate me when I was three.

Before I learned about shallow water sharks, I would swim halfway out into the ocean.I would swim halfway out into the ocean before I learned about shallow water sharks.

If I could, I would skydive.I would skydive if I could.

Lesson prepared for professional development session at Laquey Schools by Colleen Appel, teacher consultant for the Ozarks Writing Project

Anderson, Jeff. 2007. Everyday Editing: Inviting Students to Develop Skill and Craft in Writer’s Workshop. Portland, ME: Stenhouse.