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THEOWLWHOWASAFRAIDOFTHEDARK-CHAPTER1

ORIGINALVERSION1211WORDS

2NDDRAFT–REWRITTENASSCREENPLAYANDPAREDBACK-537WORDS

1)  SIDECHARACTERS–couldmergeparents’roleinto1parent,andcutthe

numberofminorcharactersPlopspeaksto.Currentlyinthebookthere

are7minorcharactersincludingacat,plussomeextranon-speaking

scouts.

2)  PAREBACKSUBPLOTS–theseinclude“food”,“sleep”,andparentshunting.

3)  MAKETHEPLOTMOREEFFICIENT–notallparagraphscontributeto

characterbuildingorhelptocreatetensionandatmosphere.

4)  PHRASINGCHANGES–cutdescriptionsastheywillbeseenintheillustrations.

CH1–DARKISEXITING

SCENE1

EXT.TREE:PLOPFALLSDOWNTHROUGHBRANCHES

EXT:GROUNDATBASEOFTREE

PLOPsomersaultspastboy.

BOY:Ooh!AgiantCatherine-wheel!

PLOPActuallyI’maBarnOwl.

BOY:Ohyes-soyouare.Ofcourse,youcouldn'tbeafireworkyet.Dadsayswe

can'thavethefireworksuntilitgetsdark.Oh,Iwishitwouldhurryupandget

darksoon.

PLOP:Youwantittogetdark?

BOY:Oh,yes!DARKISEXCITING.Andtonightisspeciallyexcitingbecausewe'regoing

tohavefireworks.

PLOP:Whatarefireworks?Idon'tthinkowlshavethem-notBarnOwls,anyway.'

BOY:Don'tyou?Youpoorthing.Well,therearerockets,andflyingsaucers,and

volcanoes,andgoldenrain,andsparklers,and...”

PLOP:Butwhatarethey?Doyoueatthem?

'BOY:No!Daddysetsfiretotheirtailsandtheywhooshintotheairandfillthesky

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withcolouredstars-well,therockets,thatis.I'mallowedtoholdthesparklers.

PLOP:Whataboutthevolcanoes?Andthegoldenrain?Whatdotheydo?

BOY:Oh,theysortofburstintoshowersofstars.Thegolden rainpours-well,like

rain.

PLOP:Andtheflyingsaucers?

BOY:Oh,they'resuper!Theywhizzroundyourheadandmakeasortof wheeeee

noise.Ilikethembest.

PLOP:IthinkIwouldlikefireworks.

BOY:I'msureyouwould.Lookhere,wheredoyoulive?

PLOP:Upinthattree-inthetopflat.Therearesquirrelsfartherdown.

BOY:Thatbigtreeinthemiddleofthefield?Well,youcanwatchourfireworks

fromthere!That'sourgarden-theonewiththeswing.Youlookoutassoonasit

getsdark..'

PLOP:Doesithavetobedark?

BOY:ofcourseitdoes!Youcan'tseefireworksunlessit'sdark.Well,Imustgo.

These

Sticksareforthebonfire.'

PLOP:Bonfire?What'sthat?'

BOY:You'llseeifyoulookouttonight.Good-bye!

PLOP:Good-bye.

PLOPFlapsbackuptobranch.

EXT.TREEBRANCH.

MRSOWL:Well?

PLOP:Thelittleboysays“DARKISEXCITING”

MRSOWL:Andwhatdoyouthink,Plop?

PLOP:Istilldonotlikeitatall,butI’mgoingtowatchthefireworks-ifyouwillsit

byme.

MRSOWL:Iwillsitbyyou.

MROWL:SowillI.Ilikefireworks.

EXT.TREEBRANCH&FIELD,NIGHTTIME

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MROWL:Comeon,Plop!Ithinkthey'restarting.Weshallseebeautifullyfrom

here.

*Plopedgesfromnesthole*

MRSOWL:I'mhere.Comeon.

EXT:FIREWORKDISPLAY

MROWL:What'sthat?

EXT.C/UCATHERINEWHEEL

PLOP:Oh,that’saflyingsaucer

MROWL:Really?I'veneverseenoneofthosebefore.Youseemtoknowallabout

it.What'sthatfizzyonethatkeepsjiggingupanddown?

PLOP:Iexpectthat'smyfriendwithasparkler.Ooooh!TheresaMe!

MROWL:Ibegyourpardon?

PLOP:It'saCatherine-wheel!ThelittleboythoughtIwasaCatherine-wheelwhen

Ilanded.Oh,isn'titbeautiful?AndhethoughtIwasone!

MROWL:Thatmusthavebeenquitealanding.