Theatre 271 The Artists WayChapter Questions:

Chapter 1: Recovering a Sense of Safety

1. Examine the negative beliefs you have about yourself. Identify your top 10 core negative beliefs.

2. Time Travel. List 3 old enemies of your creative self-worth. Please be as specific as possible in doing this exercise. Your historic monsters are the building blocks of our core negative beliefs. (yes, rotten Sister Ann Rita from fifth grade does count, and the rotten thing she said to you does matter. Put her in.) This is your Monster Hall of Fame. More monsters will come to you as you work through your recovery. It is always necessary to acknowledge creative injuries and grieve them. Otherwise, they become creative scar tissue and block your growth. Describe what they said to you and how it made you feel.

3. Time Travel: List three old champions of your creative self=worth. This is your Hall of Champions, those who wish you and your creativity well. Be specific. Every encouraging word counts. Even if you disbelieve a compliment, record it. It may well be true. Describe what they said to you and how it made you feel.

4. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the chapter.

Chapter 2: Recovering a Sense of Identity

5. Where does your time go? List your five major activities this week. How much time did you give to each one? Which were what you wanted to do and which were shoulds? How much time is helping others or doing for others and ignoring your own desires? SchoolMusicGamesWorkSleep?I dunno, I havent really diversified myself much beyond that. I dont think Ive even really seen any friends this week. I spent honestly probably most of my time playing games. That should not be how it is. I wish I would have read some for pleasure, and spent more time on school and music. I wish I didnt have to work. I want to get a work study, so I can do work in things that I actually care about and get paid for it, but I think the window of opportunity is passed. Not a lot of my time is for others, really. I guess work kinda counts as doing for others, but mostly its getting the money for myself so I have the opportunity to do things like go see live theater. Im kind a selfish person, whoops.

6. Draw a circle on a sheet of paper. Inside that circle, place topics you need to protect and names of people in your life who are supportive of you. Outside the circle place the things or names of those you must be self-protective around.

I cant really do this online, so Im just gonna do a line and put people and things above and below the line.

Sisters, Mom, dad, theatre, artProfessors, Dad, non-artists

7. List 20 things you enjoy doing (rock-climbing, roller-skating, baking, riding a bike, riding a horse, playing catch, shooting baskets, going for a run, reading poetry, go-cart racing, dancing etc) When was the last time you let yourself do these things? Next to each entry, place a date you last did this thing. From this list, write down 2 favorite things that you will do this week. They need not be major; they can be small things. Find small bits of time that you can pursue these goals. Theatre This summer, if you count full scale productions. This week if you just mean work.Video Games This SaturdayReading probably a week agoEating good food todayTraveling August 30thBuying Carelessly August 20thMovies at the theatre August 20thDancing Thursday Singing TodayCoffee with friends about a week agoBoard Games a month or so, maybe moreTaking a bath August 30thDrawing A few daysMaking new friends Today!Tubing First week of julyTaking pictures a long long time. Ive snapped a few in the past dayOrganizing YesterdayBaking a couple of monthsSleeping in a couple of weeksKnitting a year or so

8. Life Pie: Draw a circle. Divide it into 6 pieces. Label one pie Spirituality, another exercising, another play, one work,, one friends, and one Romance/adventure. Place a dot in each slice at the degree to which you are fulfilled in that area (outer rim indicates great; inner circle, not so great). Connect the dots. This will show you where you are lopsided. Okay, so I did this, but I cant get it online. Ill bring it to class I guess?

9. List 10 Changes: List ten changes youd like to make for yourself, from the significant to the small or vice versa. Write them out I would like to before naming each one.

I would like to discover my full potentialI would like to take a leap of faithI would like to strive to be more understandingI would like to learn to step back from situations easierI would like to move awayI would like to take more time for meI would like to put more time into schoolI would like to learn to commit easierI would like to plan moreI would like to dress better

10. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the Chapter.

Chapter 3: Recovering a Sense of Power

11. Describe five traits you liked in yourself as a child.

To be honest with you, I cant even really remember what I thought of myself as a child.Uh, I think that I thought I was funny.I also think that I thought I was smart.I liked that I thought I was a good writer.I liked that I was energetic. It usually helped me to make friends when I was younger.I liked that I was imaginative. I remember being able to have fun just playing pretend far longer than most of my peers.

12. Take a look at your habits. Many of them may interfere with you self-nurturing. Some of the oddest things might be self-destructive. Watching TV, playing computer games, hanging out with a really boring friend, drinking too much, smoking, eating etc ) List 3 obvious rotten habits. Whats the payoff in continuing them?

One of my obvious negative habits is playing video games. I usually play when I feel like I need to relax and want to put off doing more work. It doesnt really ever require critical thinking.

Another negative habit I have seems like it wouldnt be a habit, but its sleeping. A lot of the time when I just dont feel like working, I go to bed. It makes it so I literally dont have to do anything.

Finally, I waste a lot of time on my computer, especially on social media. I check twitter all the time, and really its 90% pointless. Its just another thing to distract me from doing my work.

13. List 5 people you admire. Now list 5 people you secretly admire. What traits do each of these people have that you can cultivate further in yourself?

Darren Criss, Nina Grollman, Angela Lansbury, Ramin Karimloo, Grace Helbig.I dont know if I really secretly admire anyone if I admire them, Im usually pretty open about it. As far as traits that these people have that I would like to emulate, one of the big ones is working hard. I struggle with being driven a lot, and all of these people are constantly busting their asses to make stuff happen, and it shows. Another big one is being positive, both about myself and towards other people. Having a sense of optimism is really important to me, just in being able to have a full life. If you go into stuff with a shitty attitude, it comes out shitty.

14. List 5 people you wish you had met who are dead. Now list 5 people who are dead that youd like to hang out with for a while in eternity. What traits do you find in these people that you can look for in your friends.

This question seems morbid as fuck. I dont really know of any dead people I was really disconnected from mainstream pop culture as a child, sooo My grandma and grandpa on my dads side, I guess. Amy Winehouse would be cool to hear her live, but I dont know if I would want to hang out with her

15. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the Chapter.

I failed at answering some these questions. I dont know why, I just couldnt come up with things that wouldnt be me bullshitting for the sake of bullshitting.

Chapter 4: Recovering a Sense of Integrity

16. Time Travel: Write a letter from you at eighty years old self to you at your current age. What would you tell yourself? What interests would you urge yourself to pursue? What dreams would you encourage? Any particular advice you would give to your self right now?

Tyler,

I want to let you know; it was worth it. Everything didnt work out, and thats okay, because the things that did work out far outweigh those that didnt. You cant let your expectations get in the way of great things. Trust me, its all much easier when you just let things happen.There are times when its going to be so hard, but know that your art is worth more than anything else in the world. If you cant stay true to that, you cant stay true to anything. But I know that you can. Be patient. Things will get there. You know that, I know that you do. You just have to learn to wait. That doesnt mean dont work. It just means wait for the work to show. Because it does, and when it does, nothing else matters. The work compared to the payoff was nothing.This is all very cryptic, I know, but just trust me when I tell you that it all comes together. Youre on your way.

Tyler

17. Time Travel: Remember yourself at eight years old. What did you like to do? What were your favorite things? Now, write a letter from you at eight years old to you at your current age. What would you tell yourself?

Dear Me,

Hi! I hope youre good. I know that youre probably real busy with swimming and school and stuff, so thanks for reading my letter! We got a big writing project in school, and I wrote more than anyone else in the class. I love writing stuff, its probably my favorite besides swimming. I wonder what youre writing right now. I had to write about my dream house, which is a huge treehouse with a butler and unlimited shrimp and a whole floor of this giant video game! Its kinda like the kids next door. You probably already know that, though, cause youre me.Today I beat everyone in my group in backstroke. Im getting pretty good. I gained time on my race last meet, but Im getting better in practice so hopefully it doesnt happen again. Im glad I have coach amandad, because bryan seems mean. He yells a lot and makes them do a lot of sprinting.

Okay, I have to go to practice. Bye!

18. Look at one situation in your life that you feel you should change but havent yet. What would your life look and feel like if this were gone? Why havent you done anything about it? What is your payoff for you staying stuck?

I should really learn to just get my shit done instead of putting it off, primarily in school. Life would be so much easier, because it would lift so much stress from me and allow me to enjoy all of my time, instead of constantly finding myself in a situation where I have too much to do and not enough time. The reason I keep on procrastinating is because it makes things easier. Its easier to say oh, I didnt have enough time or I just didnt really try. It takes pressure off of me, allows myself to distance myself from the work and not really worry about it. Thats really the only payoff of it as well. I really need to work on it.

19. Questions/Comments about the Chapter.

Im not sure how I feel about my letters. They feel a bit forced, but I think generally they are the things I would say to myself. Just maybe worded a bit differently.

Chapter 5: Recovering a Sense of Possibility

20a. Quiz: a. The biggest lack in my life is b. The greatest joy in my life is. c. My Largest time commitment is. d. As I play more, I e. I feel guilty that I am. f. I worry that. g. If my dreams come true, my family will h. I sabotage myself so people will i. If I let myself feel it, Im angry that I j. One reason I get sad sometimes is

20. If I had either faith or money I would try. (list five desires) For the next week, be alert for images of these desires. When you spot them, clip them, buy them, photograph them, draw them begin a file of dreams that speak to you.

21. Ten ways I am mean to myself are

22. Honestly, my favorite creative block is TV, computer games, friends, work, over exercise, friends, work, you name it.

23. My payoff for staying blocked is

24. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the Chapter.

Chapter 6: Recovering a Sense of Abundance

25. Send postcards to 5 friends who you think about, but who may not be a large part of your life right now. Please send to people you would LOVE to hear from.

26. Clearing: Any new changes in your home environment? Make some.

27. Money Madness

a. People with money are b. Money makes people c. Id have more money if d. My dad thought money was e. My mom always thought money would f. In my family, money caused g. Money equals h. If I had money, Id i. If I could afford it Id. j. If I had some money, Id k. Im afraid that if I had money I would l. Money is.. m. Money causes n. Having money is not o. In order to have more money, Id need to p. When I have money I usually q. If I werent so cheap Id r. People think money s. Being broke tells me

27a. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the Chapter

Chapter 7: Recovering a Sense of Connection

28. Quickly list 5 favorite films. Do you see any common denominators among them? Are they romances, adventures, period pieces, political dramas, family epics, thrillers? Discuss.

29. Finish the following sentences: a. As a kid, I missed the chance to b. As a kid, I lacked c. As a kid, I could have used d. As a kid, I dreamed of being e. As a kid, I wanted a f. In my house, we never had enough g. As a kid, I needed more h. I am sorry that I will never again see i. For years, I have missed and wondered about j. I beat myself up about the loss of

29a. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the Chapter.

Chapter 8: Recovering a Sense of Strength

30. In a perfect world, where would you like to be in 5 years in relation to your dream and true north?

31. In the world we inhabit now, what action can you take, this year, to move you closer? What action can you take this month? This week? This day? Right now?

32. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the Chapter.

Chapter 9: Recovering a Sense of Compassion

33. What resentments do you have locked away? It does not mater how petty, picky or irrational these resentments may appear to your adult self. To your artist child they are real big deals. List them.

34. Ask your artist self to make a list of any and all fears about your work and/or anyone connected to it. Again, these fears can be as dumb as any two-year-old. It doesnt matter that they are groundless to your adults eyes. What matters is that they are big scary monsters to your artist.

35. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the Chapter

Chapter 10: Recovering a Sense of Self-Protection

36. The Awful Truth: Answer the following questions: a. Tell the truth,. What habit do you have that gets in the way of your creativity? b. Tell the truth. What do you think might be a problem? It is. c. What do you plan to do about the habit or problem? d. What is your payoff in holding on to this block? e. Tell the truth. Which friends make you doubt yourself? f. Tell the truth. Which friends believe in you and your talent?g. What is the payoff in keeping your destructive friends? h. What destructive habits do your destructive friends share with your destructive self? i. What constructive habits do your constructive friends share with your destructive self?

36a. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the Chapter.

Chapter 11: Recovering a Sense of Autonomy

37. Get 7 blank sheets of paper. Give one page each to the following categories: Health, possessions, leisure, relationships, creativity, career, and spirituality. With no thought as to practicality, list ten wishes in each area. Let yourself dream a little.

38. Write and mail an encouraging letter to your inner artist. Remember that your artist is a child and loves, praise and encouragement and festive plans.

39. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the Chapter .

Chapter 12: Recovering a Sense of Faith

40. Write down any resistance, angers, and fears you have about going on from here. We all have them.

41. Take a look at your current areas of procrastination. What might be your hidden fears that are holding you back? What would help you to stop procrastinating?

42. Questions/Comments/Discoveries about the Chapter.