Why Can’t My Parents Let Go?

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Question: • I am 28 years old and a university

student. • I am still living with my parents • They still expect me to be home at a

certain time

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• My dad only supports my studies at a university of his choice

• My dad wanted me to car pool with his friends

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• I have a good job and am hardly ever at home

• My parents complain about not seeing enough of me

• When I want to move out there is an argument and I stay

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• I now want to move in with my boyfriend but don’t want to leave on bad terms.

• How do I deal with it?

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Answer: • Some parents find it difficult to

let a child go. • You cannot choose the way your

parents feel about you moving out – that is their choice

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• You can choose how you view their reactions to your choices

• Your parents choose to be angry rather than supportive

• Then you choose to feel guilty and stay with them

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• Why do your parents insist on you staying with them?

• What are they afraid of? • If they are afraid they won’t see

you again, tell them how often you will call or visit – and stick with your promise

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• If they have health issues or need physical support, find an alternative before you move out.

• If they no longer get on with each other, that is their issue to resolve

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• Find out what their biggest fear is and help them resolve it

• The fear is theirs, not yours • Don’t feel guilty about wanting

to get on with your life

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• Be firm and loving without taking on their issues

• If they choose to be angry, love them and remain calm

• They will choose to love you back

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Thank You