By Adam Larter

integrated

There once was a very integrated caterpillar, his name was small-brand engagement.

He wanted to be big and strong and engage all his consumers with social media. . . So he asked his mum and dad.

How can I be big and

strong? Like you and all

the other big brands

You need to visit the Forrest, the Forrest of

paid, owned, earned media.

Off he trotted to the Forrest . . .

When he got to the Twitter tree he was so hungry for engagement he immediately set-up Several twitter accounts . . .

SocialCaterpillar  @thecaterpillartweets  Hi  all,  looking  for  everyone  to  retweet  everything  I  say  in  exchange  for  coupons  and  meaningless  drivel.  #SMWLDN  

He started spamming everyone with crap

He felt quite engaged, but still he wanted more . . .

He came across the YouTube bird who said that . . .

You could engage people by doing a version of the Harlem Shake set

in your office with your logo everywhere. . .

Despite being 5 months late to the party everyone would

definitely find it hilarious

 

He felt quite engaged, but still he wanted more . . .

You could engage a B2B audience by joining

LinkedIn and commenting on all the threads even if you don’t know anything

about that topic. You definitely wont just get

loads of Spam off recruitment consultants.

The LinkedIn . . . Log? Then approached him

He checked his Klout score and he STILL wasn’t as engaged as he wanted to be.

Engagement  Caterpillar  

He found an old empty barn they called Google+ but even a Caterpillar as hungry as him couldn’t be bothered to go in there . . . It looked so empty and he couldn’t really work out what it was. . .

Out of nowhere came the Facebook Fox.

Why don’t you run a competition where people have to like

your brand’s page in order to get a

chance to win some shitty prize, then they’ll be REALLY engaged with your

brand.

He was so engaged that he needed a big long nap . . . In his cocoon.

When he awoke he was a beautiful butterfly . . .

But he couldn’t fly because his wings were made of bullshit . . . He died.