T h e U g g o U g l a c yC h a p t e r 1

Hello everyone! I’m here with a new Uglacy! Basically, 10 generations buttugly sims no cheat.

And this is my founder, Francisco Uglacy (named after Francisco Lachowski). I’m gonna follow a model naming scheme because I love the irony in naming ugly sims after beautiful people. Fran wants to be a Superstar Athlete. I would choose Supermodel as a LTW for him but dang no such option. Let’s get on with the legacy, shall we?

“Why did you put me on an empty plot of land?! Who are you anyway?!”

Well well you’ll find out soon enough. For now just think of me as… a voice in your head.

“Your house looks nothing like mine, sir. Please just adopt me.”

“I could be your personal trainer! Get you fit to get some ladies!! Just adopt me I don’t want to live on a plot of empty land!!”

Life will get better once you find an ugly soulmate, Francisco.

Did I not make myself clear? I said ugly, Francsico! And she is definitely not ugly.

“Shush voice in my head. She’s clearly smitten with me, can’t you see? And she’s rich. I want a sugar mommy.”

Everywhere Francisco went, everybody kept talking to him with these heart shaped speech bubbles. And none of them were ugly!! Seriously, where are the ugly girls hiding at?!

“Oh hey Molly, are you rich? Please save me!”

“What? Ok sure whatever you’re hot. *more hearts flutter*”

Well, tomorrow will be a better day.

“Come on if I can’t find anyone ugly, can’t I just marry someone pretty?”

No. You better find someone tomorrow or you can sleep on this lawn forever.

“You’re the worst.”

“I’M GONNA RUN AWAY FROM THIS MADNESSSSSSS”

“lol jk I’m just having my morning jog”

“WHAT? Now you expect me to shower in the open?”

I don’t see what’s wrong with it. Maybe this will help you attract some perverts to be your wife. And with a wife, you won’t need to bathe in the open anymore!!

“Ugh”

Okay actually this is a pretty bad idea.

I don’t think this is the correct reaction one is supposed to give when you see a stranger showering and vice versa. What’s up with those hearts?!

“Hnnnnng what a good day to be posting mail today…”

“GET OFF MY LAWN YOU WEIRD POSTWOMAN!!”

Yea this was what I was expecting.

“Give me your autograph before I leave! I know martial arts you better give me what I want!!”

“Okay okay chill man. I didn’t know I was a Superstar already.”

Ew what are those green fumes coming from your pits.

“Check out the lady checking out my ass from behind. Nobody will care about these green fumes when you’ve got a bod like mine.”

Go get her then!

“I rather die than marry an ugly girl, please don’t force me *cringes face*”

“DID I REALLY DIE? I can walk through doors!!”

Sim glitch every where.

I was sick of Fran not being able to find an ugly wife. So I called the ugliest person in his phonebook and invited her over.

But this was a mistake because I meant to call this person’s (Fiona) daughter, River, instead of her. Who cares, Fran can use some romancing no matter who????

“Francisco, I have something to tell you…”

“Yea Fiona?”

“I’m actually married…”

It still did not strike me at this point that I called the wrong person. So… I made her leave her husband. For nothing. Oops.

This was the ugliest girl (Blair Wainwright) Francisco could find in the entire neighbourhood. At this point I was like heck it!!! Just get married and get some children, next generation hideous soulmate searching will be better…… hopefully.

“So Blair, what do you say to having kids with me?”

“Uhh I don’t think so. You’re the kind of weird legacy people my rich parents warned me about…”

“Wait!!1!! Did you say rich? Marry me this instant, now PRONTO.”

“… just get away from me.”

As if the family isn’t poor enough, this burglar had to steal the toilet bowl. Seriously?! Who steals a toilet bowl??? I don’t understand these sim criminals at all.

Being poor and being in the athlete career means Francisco has to spend lots of time at the gym. But seems like today is bring-your-cocoons-to-the-gym day?

A baby in the gym. A+ for parenting, whoever the parent of this kid is.

FINALLY, GET THIS OVER AND DONE WITH!!!

“Marry me, Blair?”

“OMG RING!!!!!!!”

Yes yes yes they are finally married!?!!

This Blair bitch didn’t say yes. Instead she just laughed really hard in Francisco’s face. OMG just look at Fran’s face. :’(

“Blair, I’m so hungry I’m GOING TO EAT YOU BIATCH FOR REJECTING ME”

“loljk, c’mon marry me.”

Francisco tries a second time.

“Yes of course Franny!!!”

Luckily for him, twice’s a charm.

Exchange rings yada yada. Apparently the game is screwing with Francisco because there is no option to move in Blair, AT ALL!! This means no extra simoleans for him to live in a proper house.

But I solved the moving in problem with boolprop but no money was moved from Blair’s family to Fran. So, too bad, 41 simoleans it is for a married life…

Even better news, he can’t earn any simoleans because newly wed couples get 3 days off from work. This is just ridiculous!!!

Since she didn’t bring any single simolean in, she gets to eat cereal on the toilet bowl. Ah the life experience of every legacy founder sim.

Oh yea if anybody is interested (probably nobody), Blair wants to be an International Super Spy.

“I’M SO FULL FRANNY”

“Lay off the cereal man Blair!! We’re so poor we can’t afford so much cereal!!!!”

Actually the cereal is free Fran.

“Oh.”

And she’s not full, she’s actually nauseated. That means she…

“It means she’s a glutton she ate so much she’s gonna puke yea yea I get it”

Fran is wrong, duh, cause she’s preggers!!!

Now, all of a sudden, Blair accuses Francisco of cheating. HOW DID THIS EVEN HAPPEN?!

“Blair, how could I cheat on you!!! I was in love with Fiona before I met you. That’s in the past now. We haven’t even talked or seen each other since I met you, how did you even find out I cheated on you?!?!!”

“Don’t be angry anymore please baby”

“DON’T EVEN TALK TO ME ANYMORE!”

“Chill Blair, why don’t you go get a facial?”

“ARRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHH”

No seriously that’s what she said in the game. I was just really amused throughout this whole scene.

“FUDGE OFF FRANCISCO”

“OMG DON’T HIT ME”

“Stop yelling Blair!!! You’ve been yelling non-stop since I asked you to go for a facial!!!!”

I think she’s in labour Fran.

“NO, she’s just angry at me for nothing I swear NOTHING!!”

“I’m going to bed. I hope she stops yelling soon ugh”

Um say what?

“FORGET IT, that cheater is useless. I’ll drive myself to the hospital with my broken water.”

Wow I’m just really confused now.

Francisco made it to the hospital in the end. Welcome Jake Uglacy (named after Jake Cooper) and Cara Uglacy (named after Cara Delevingne) to the family!!

You know what guys, Blair is not exactly the prettiest but she isn’t ugly. So I hope Jake and Cara gets the worst genetics from both of them... Is my uglacy gonna fail lol.

“Drive off, cabbie”

“Aren’t you going to wait for your husband?”

“That man is not my husband. DRIVE!”

In the end, Francisco did get into the cab. They don’t really hate each other that much huh.

You know what? They are too poor to afford cribs so the floor is where the babies will sleep.

“I don’t want to live such a broke life anymore I’m gonna run through the fridge!11!!!!!”

What the heck are you doing Fran?

“Running into a fridge to get cereal duh. It’s cool to do this (pun intended)”

Um.

Their marriage is in the ruins now. They can’t even sleep on the same bed.

“I refuse to sleep with that manwhore…”

“I’M SO HUNGRY I’M GONNA EAT YOU UP BLAIR BIATCH”

“loljk”

Blair is a really good mother actually. Just look at her using Jake to flatten her nose.

It’s like they are communicating using telepathy.

“Cheater get out of the bed so I can sleep in it”

“Biatch get your own bed”

“We’re too poor for another bed cheater”

I shall leave you guys with a sleep-deprived Blair and crying babies. What will happen to Blair and Francisco’s marriage? And how will the kids turn out? Stay tuned!! Any comments or tips regarding finding ugly spouses will be appreciated!!!