Post on 21-Jul-2016
description
Boys Night OutTrainwreck
1 .
I N T R O D U C I N G
Initial Diagnosis: Catatonic.
The wounds seem to be healing, and he seems to be getting along without his appendages, and I know he seems fine, But ‘seems’ can be a very dangerous word, especially in this business, it can be fatal.
I know he’s back there somewhere
This man’s tragedy has made him a prisoner in his own body. And it’s not just tragedy, it’s dementia, despair; it’s this hole I can see in each of his eyes, where all the events that happen in this real world kind of just fall through. It’s loneliness in it’s most crippling form, the kind that no amount of love, or human contact, could ever mend.
The patient was plagued by violent nightmares, terrible, deeply troubling dreams, which one night overflowed in to reality, and he murdered his wife, in his sleep.
These people were in love, deeply in love. And it was that love filling those holes that I can now see behind his eyes. And it’s my job to try and fill those holes with something else.
But with what? Hope? I can try to fill those holes with drugs, soothing words, but that’s all.
I hope his wounds will heal with time, but right now, things aren’t looking good.
TH
E
LI
NE
S
I
WE
AR
AR
OU
ND
MY
W
RI
ST
AR
E
TH
ER
E
TO
P
RO
VE
TH
AT
I
EX
IS
T
2 .
D R E A M
I N G
I A M
SHAPE
LESS
FORM
LESS
I A M
FORM
LESS
On some nights I’m better left alone
On some nights you’ll find me falling
W A K E
U P
you’re bu
ried...or su
ffocating
...
.............or worse
T H I S
C O M A
K I S S I S
I N F I N I T E a n d y o u r b o d y t u r n i n g
b l u e a s y o u l a y
d i r e c t l y n e x t t o m e
c o l o r s t h i s o n e
i n b l u i s h h u e s a n d
d a r k e r g r e y s
T H I S
C O M A
K I S S I S
I N F I N I T E a n d y o u r b o d y t u r n i n g
b l u e a s y o u l a y
d i r e c t l y n e x t t o m e
c o l o r s t h i s o n e
i n b l u i s h h u e s a n d
d a r k e r g r e y s
we are this dream - fluid and intricate
so this is what has become
of everything that I loved
the betrayal and the blood
became inseparable
from the most beautiful
nightmare I’ve ever hadC O M P L E T E L YI N S E P A R A B L E
C O M P L E T E L YI N S E P A R A B L E
3 .
W A K I N G
Make this a dream because I really can’t believe that she’s gone
I ’ M
N O T
H E R E
A N D
T H I S
I S N ’ T
HAPPENING
I C A N ’ T
B E L I E V E
T H A T
S H E ’ S
G O N E
I C A N ’ T
B E L I E V E
T H A T
S H E ’ S
G O N E
Mar
vel
as t
his
mad
man
, as
th
is m
akes
hif
t-m
onst
er r
ips
thro
ug
h t
he
room
.
Wat
ch i
n f
ear
as h
e co
mes
com
ple
tely
un
glu
ed.
WE’LL
WAKE
UP AND
SHE’LL
BE NEXT
TO ME
I can’t breathe
I D O N ’ T
D E S E R V E
T O T A K E
T H E S E
B R E A T H S
I C A N ’ T F E E LNumb to everything
I C A N ’ T F E E LNumb to everything
I C A N ’ T
B E L I E V E
T H A T
S H E ’ S
G O N EWE’LL
WAKE
UP AND
SHE’LL
BE NEXT
TO ME
4 .
S E N T E N C I N G
my name is evidence, my role is undeniable, unless I’ve become inadmissible in crimes of consequence
I’m only as reliable as the
defendant’s defense is defendable
I’m
un
wil
lin
g t
o be
sti
ll a
nd a
ccep
t th
is e
vil
as m
y ow
n p
erso
nal
an
d s
enti
ent
wil
l.
when murder’s just a mistake that you have made
nothing makes sense anymore,
“It’s this hole I can see in each of his eyes...
where all of the events that happen in this
real world kind of just fall through”
IT
’S
LO
NE
LI
-
NE
SS
IT
’S
LO
NE
LI
-
NE
SS
5 .
M E D I C A T I N G
When you wake up to white walls and endless hallsthere’s an emptiness that echoes through it all
Can’t you see that I don’t need this place?Doctor, doctor what am I here for?
Can’t you see that I don’t need this place?
I D O N ’ T
N E E D
T H E S E
W A L L S
I ’ M N O
T H R E A T
A T A L L
I ’ M N O
T H R E A T
A T A L L
I D O N ’ T
N E E D
T H E S E
W A L L Sand I regret it every dayif I could make things right,
you know I’d find a way
Yes I know what I’ve done
I ’ M N O
T H R E A T
A T A L L
I ’ M N O
T H R E A T
A T A L L
Doctor, I can’t thank you enough
I ’ M N O
T H R E A T
A T A L L
Doctor, I can’t thank you enough
I ’ M N O
T H R E A T
A T A L L
Doctor you won’t regret this.
I ’ M N O
T H R E A T
A T A L L
I ’ M N O
T H R E A T
A T A L L
6 .
P U R G I N G
The first night after you’re release,
no one expects you to get much sleep
you’re the waking, walking dead
walk to the kitchen and grab a marker
T R A C E
T H E
P A T H
T H E
B L O O D
W I L L
F L O W
TH
E
LI
NE
S
I
WE
AR
AR
OU
ND
MY
W
RI
ST
AR
E
TH
ER
E
TO
P
RO
VE
TH
AT
I
EX
IS
T
these nightmare lines, an empty heartwe take for granted all the things that make us who we are
I’m th
e perfect p
icture of com
placen
cy and th
at’s all I feel
the perfect blade, was a perfect whiteagainst the perfect lines, from last perfect night
here lies clarity in a perfect grave comprised of perfect steel
as the h
orror fills th
eir eyes s
lo
w m
otio
n r
epla
ces
real
tim
e
THESE
CLAWS WILL
NEVER KILL
AGAIN
T H E L I N E S
I W E A R
A R O U N D
M Y W R I S T
ARE THERE
TO PROVE
THAT I
EXIST
T H E L I N E S
I W E A R
A R O U N D
M Y W R I S T
ARE THERE
TO PROVE
THAT I
EXIST
I am a monster, clothed in crimson sleevesand perforated lines where my wrists should be
A warehouse full of workers scramble like a pack of bewildered wolves
and I fall.
as my world turns black...
A warehouse full of workers scramble like a pack of bewildered wolves
7 .
R E L A P S I N G
it might not be the keyTo fix the memory of you and me
S U R G E R Y
There’s more to this than my Ex-love and my ex-limbs could ever in my life begin to explain
A S O N G
S O A W F U L
A N D S O
P E R F E C TEverytime I think of her and what went on that nightI don’t see it, instead I hear it.
Its like each word and every chord refuses to be ignored
I need this song to be shouted outAnd to be heard by everyone
Its like each word and every chord refuses to be ignored
I need this song to be shouted outAnd to be heard by everyone
THIS IS
BIGGER
THAN ME
But with no hands and even less skillI don’t know how it ever will come out
it might not be the keyTo fix the memory of you and me
S U R G E R Y
In such a way to bring out beautyThen, well, who am I to stop it?
I’ll bring her back and I won’t stop until it’s doneU N T I L T H I S
N I G H T M A R E ’ S
U N D O N E
I think it’s her I hearIt’s always beenBut if this pain can be arranged
I
NEED
HER
I
N
EE
D
HE
R
I
N
EE
D
TH
IS
The saddest songs can sing themselves, and just sing along
So if death’s the answer,
then the question
is the triggerand I’m just the firing pin
I’
M
JU
ST
A
ME
SS
EN
GE
RDO
OM
ED
TO
DE
TO
NA
TE
ON
DE
LI
VE
RY
DO
OM
ED
TO
DE
TO
NA
TE
ON
DE
LI
VE
RY
8 .
R E C O V E R I N G
these w
alls are un
forgivin
g
One pill will get me through the day but I take two anyway
when I take three pills
Its in the back of my head and its everywhereand its all I can think about
TH
E
SO
NG
B
EG
IN
S
TO
P
LA
Y
the song begins to play
one that won’t go away.
comatose alm
ost
B E T W E E N
H A L F W A Y
L I V I N G
AND
HALFWAY
LYING
I float between hospitals
B E T W E E N
H A L F W A Y
L I V I N G
AND
HALFWAY
LYING
I take my medicine and make them believe that I’m a better man
and halfway homes
but still I hear the song
surrounding me and ringing in my ears.
I T S
E V E R Y
W H E R E
I T S
E V E R Y
W H E R E
the perfect song will call for sedatives, sacrifice and sing-alongs
SO
S
IN
G
AL
ON
G
9 .
C O M P O S I N G
It’s all about the song in my head
The one where the audience is all dead
I’ve begged friends and family for forgivenessAnd now for the first time
SO
C
OM
E
SI
NG
W
IT
H
ME
Together we’ll live this song I’ve been living incessantly
together we’ll witness
I S E E
H E R
F A C E
MY LOVE,
MY HEART
And the world will sing it
To me it’s everything
I HEAR
HER
LAUGHTER
S H E ’ S
S T I L L
A L I V E
I wrote this song
It’s all about the song in my head
The one where the audience is all dead
O N L Y
T H R O U G H
D E A T H
O U R
V O I C E S
W I L L
J O I N
T O G E T H E R
1 0 .
D I S I N T E G R A T I N G
This halfway house is home to a madman.His ghosts, and his perfect song
AB
AN
DO
N
AL
L
HO
PE
,
YE
W
HO
EN
TE
R
HE
RE
I’ve sensed her here, but I know that we’re destined
to stay seperated.
t
his
is
all
my
fau
lt.
It’s worsening, and my song demands an ending
K A R M A
C A N ’ T
C O N T R O L
T H E
B E A S TCLOSURE
SO
F
OR
GI
VE
ME
,
LO
VE
I’
M
CH
OO
SI
NG
A
FI
TT
IN
G
EN
D
TO
T
HE
AB
US
IN
G
1 1 .
H E A L I N G
TO
NI
GH
T,
IT
’S
W
OR
SE
TO
NI
GH
T,
TH
E
SC
RE
AM
IN
G
HU
RT
S
music this magnificentand medicine are one and the samethey make life worth living; hearts worth healing
they make life worth living; hearts worth healing
1 2 .
D Y I N G
Picture yourself in a nightmarish
scene of such grotesque complexity
that you’d kill to be dreaming.
Your body’s been dying, while your mind
has been trying to make you picture a life
where you’d kill for your lover
and a song in your head.
The deaths of countless others
merely set up the lyrics for your symphony.
That’s where you’ll find me.
God, what’s happened here? He’s completely torn his entire apartment apartThe smell is overpowering... a foul, pungent odor,Like rotten food or I don’t know, possibly something worse.But there’s something else that’s almost overpowering...
I think its a woman’s perfume. Oh no... no!
I found the patient, he’s lying on the floor in the center of the living roomCompletely naked, emaciated, deathly pale.
It appears he hasn’t eaten anything at all for weeksThe infection has spread up his arms, it must have reached his brainThere’s bulging, bright red veins all the way up from his wrist to his neck
There’s empty bottles everywhere... alcohol, medication...My god this smell is sickening!
There’s blood coming out of his mouth, nose, ears...
He’s not dead yet, but he’s close
I failed, this is my fault!And somehow, he’s smiling at me, I think he’s whispering something,No, not just whispering, I think he’s singing...
This is the end. This is death.
T H E L I N E S
I W E A R
A R O U N D
M Y W R I S T ARE THERE
TO PROVE
THAT I
EXIST
T H E L I N E S
I W E A R
A R O U N D
M Y W R I S T ARE THERE
TO PROVE
THAT I
EXIST
We were inseperable.
Artist: Boys Night OutAlbum: TrainwreckBooklets by: Brian Culmo ©2015
a story in 12 parts, revisited 10 years after the original releaseMusic: Boys Night Out 2005
Art: Brian Culmo 2015