Authentic Communication:Skills for ManagingConflict

Laura KingHenley Leadership GroupSeptember 30, 2016

Intentional, Thoughtful Disruption™

The High Cost of Conflict

The Dreaded Drama Triangle™(Karpman Drama Triangle)

RescuerPersecutor

Victim

Meet the Persecutor

PersecutorYelling, Cursing, Dominating

Being Sarcastic

Being Smart

“What are you thinking?”

Say Hello to the Rescuer

RescuerPeace at any Price

Acting Politically

Being Nice When You Don’t Feel Nice

“Let’s just all get along.”

Greetings Victim

Victim

Poor Me

Feeling Powerless

Blaming Circumstance

“Why does this always happen to me?”

Positions Please…RescuerPersecutor

Victim

“Let’s just all get along.”

“Why does this always happen to me?”

“What are you thinking?”

Making the Shift From Drama to Empowerment

RescuerPersecutor

Victim

Creator

Challenger Coach

Increasing capacity to envision and create

outcomes by answering the question “what do I

want?”

Choosing your response to circumstances – even

when problems arise.

Welcome the CreatorAntidote to the powerless victim

Catalyst for change

Focused on the outcome

Courageous truth teller

“What is my intention?”

Embrace the ChallengerAntidote to the judgmental persecutor

Ask powerful questions

Utilize curiosity, inquiry and deep listening

See everyone as a natural Creator to finding

solutions

Engage as CoachAntidote to the overextended rescuer

Where’s your Shift?Creator

Challenger Coach

“What do I want?”

“What is my intention?” “What do you want?”

Putting it to work

Notice your position

Identify patterns and preference

Shift with intention

Commit to create

Laura Kinglaurak@henleyleadership.com

Carol Zizzocarol@henleyleadership.com

(206) 686-4400 x13www.henleyleadership.com

Intentional, Thoughtful Disruption™