Men are From MarsMen are From MarsWomen are from VenusWomen are from Venus

John Gray TheoriesJohn Gray Theories

Values Values

Men like to offer Men like to offer solutionssolutions directly to directly to women, when a problem arises, while women, when a problem arises, while women, offer women, offer unsolicited adviceunsolicited advice. .

When men do this, it invalidates the When men do this, it invalidates the women’s feelings, and men do not like to women’s feelings, and men do not like to be “told what to do”, especially if they be “told what to do”, especially if they didn’t ask for advice.didn’t ask for advice.

Stress Stress Men tend to Men tend to pull awaypull away and silently think and silently think

about what’s bothering them, Going into about what’s bothering them, Going into their “their “cavecave””

Women feel an instinctive need to Women feel an instinctive need to talktalk about about what’s bothering them. what’s bothering them.

Motivation Motivation

Men feel motivated Men feel motivated when they feel when they feel neededneeded

Women are Women are motivated when they motivated when they

feel feel cherishedcherished..

Languages Languages

Men express things more Men express things more literallyliterally

Women express things more about Women express things more about feelings feelings

Intimacy Intimacy

A man gets close, but then A man gets close, but then inevitably needs to inevitably needs to pull awaypull away

Women need to understand this, Women need to understand this, and understand that when he and understand that when he retreats, he will swing back like a retreats, he will swing back like a rubber bandrubber band

Loving Attitude Loving Attitude Women are more like a wave and men need to Women are more like a wave and men need to learn to interpret how to be supportive.learn to interpret how to be supportive.The wave is a natural cycle for women that is The wave is a natural cycle for women that is centered around their abilities to give to other centered around their abilities to give to other people. When they feel full of love and energy to people. When they feel full of love and energy to give to others their wave is in a stable place. As give to others their wave is in a stable place. As they give to others (and don't receive the same they give to others (and don't receive the same amount of love and attention given to them in amount of love and attention given to them in return) their wave begins to grow until it return) their wave begins to grow until it eventually crashes. This is a time when a women eventually crashes. This is a time when a women feels she has nothing else to give to those in her feels she has nothing else to give to those in her life and she needs the love of those around her life and she needs the love of those around her (including self love) to help come out of this dark (including self love) to help come out of this dark place. Once she is rejuvenated (by getting the place. Once she is rejuvenated (by getting the support she needs) she is able to pop out of this support she needs) she is able to pop out of this dark place and once again has love and energy to dark place and once again has love and energy to give.give.

Love Love

Men and women usually give the kind of Men and women usually give the kind of love love theythey need and not what the need and not what the opposite sex needs. opposite sex needs.

Men primarily need Men primarily need Trust, AcceptanceTrust, Acceptance, , and and AppreciationAppreciation. .

Women primarily need Women primarily need caringcaring, , understanding, and respect. understanding, and respect.

Argument Argument

MenMen like to act as if they are like to act as if they are always always rightright, which may , which may invalidate a woman’s feelings invalidate a woman’s feelings

Women sometimes Women sometimes unknowingly send messages unknowingly send messages of of disapprovaldisapproval instead of instead of disagreement, inciting a man’s disagreement, inciting a man’s defenses defenses

Score Score

Men think that one Big gift or Men think that one Big gift or sacrifice, balances many little sacrifice, balances many little signs of affection.signs of affection.

Ex. $200 gift = 20 acts of love or service.Ex. $200 gift = 20 acts of love or service.

Women put equal values on each loving Women put equal values on each loving act.act.

Ex. $200 gift = 1 act of love or service.Ex. $200 gift = 1 act of love or service.