# 2
guideA
zI
MO
NTA
NA
The last long weekend of sum
mer is alm
ost here,and I hope you’re hittin’ the road!
With a w
hole extra day to explore, why not cross
the border and spend a few days in M
ontana?
Montana is aw
esome. There are S
O m
any places to see &
adventures to have in Montana, so this guide
is an alphabetical list of some of m
y favouriteplaces, landm
arks & random
things I’ve found when
I’ve been out exploring!
So go! D
rive safe! Be nice! H
ave fun!B
ring back a case of coconut La Croix for m
e!
AB
I couldn’t decide which B
was m
ore important,
so here are two.
BB
iso
n Located about 1 hour N
orth of Missoula,
the National Bison R
ange is one of the oldestN
ational Wildlife R
efuges in the US. Along w
iththe bison herd, you’re likely to see antelopeand a shitload of different birds.
alza
da
is a small tow
n with a population of
about 29. This town used to be nam
ed Stoneville,after a local bartender, Lou Stone. N
ot sure if oldLou is still kickin’ but the Stoneville Saloon sureis, and it’s definitely w
orth a visit if you’re into drinking $2 beers in the coolest bar in the w
orld.If you’re not, you m
ay as well stop reading now...
BIS
CU
ITS
AN
D G
RAV
Y. G
uaranteed to be on every m
enu in every restaurant or diner that you stop in. Totally hits the spot after a night of $2 beer!
C R
ight after the Sweetgrass border crossing is a
little town nam
ed Sunburst. Not m
uch goin’ on inSunburst other than the C
HU
RC
H B
AR. A bar in
an old church. It’s actually called The Mint Bar,
but I like to call it the Church Bar. There’s even a
bunkhouse so you can sleep over! Thursday is C
LA
M N
IGH
T, which is also a C
-word.
DInto ghosts and spooky stuff? I’m
not. But theD
UD
E R
AN
CH
ER
LO
DG
E in Billings has a ghostthat I had to deal w
ith in real life. Other than that it
was a really great night. Super cute decor!
G
Ev
el K
nie
vel w
as b
orn
in B
utte
so
they
hav
e a
big
craz
y st
reet
par
ty in
his
hon
or e
very
yea
r. It
alre
ady
happ
ened
this
yea
r, bu
t may
be p
lan
ahea
d fo
r nex
t yea
r! (e
velk
niev
elda
ys.o
rg)
E F A
lso
in B
utte
is th
e FR
EEW
AY
TAV
ER
N. F
amou
sfo
r the
ir Po
rk C
hop
Sand
wic
h, a
nd th
e fis
h bu
rger
is p
retty
goo
d to
o! E
vel K
niev
el u
sed
to h
ang
out
ther
e, a
nd I
won
$40
on
the
slot
mac
hine
s.
Spea
king
of s
lot m
achi
nes,
one
of m
y fa
vorit
eth
ings
to d
o in
Mon
tana
is G
AM
BLE! B
elly
up
to a
lmos
t any
bar
and
look
for a
jar t
hat s
ays
“Sha
ke-A
-Day
”. It
will
usua
llly c
ost $
1, a
nd y
ouge
t one
cha
nce
to ro
ll 5
dice
. If y
ou ro
ll al
l the
sam
e nu
mbe
r, yo
u w
in th
e w
hole
pot
!
H I
love
a g
ood
Ha
mb
ur
ger
, and
the
ones
at t
heM
isso
ula
Clu
b (in
Mis
soul
a, o
bvs)
are
nex
t lev
el.
Not
hing
els
e on
the
men
u, ju
st b
urge
rs &
bee
r. So
don
’t go
if y
ou d
on’t
like
burg
ers
& be
er.
H A
noth
er g
ood
Mon
tana
“H” i
s H
UC
KLEB
ER
RY
!H
uckl
eber
ries
are
frigg
in’ e
very
whe
re th
ere,
and
mid
-Jul
y to
late
Aug
ust i
s pr
ime
pick
in’ s
easo
n.Pi
ck u
p so
me
loca
lly m
ade
jam
or p
ie, o
r jus
t pul
lov
er a
nd p
ick
som
e yo
urse
lf!
IU
mm
m...
the
I-90
is a
pre
tty
good
hig
hway
...
J K N
If yo
u fin
d yo
urse
lf in
the
grea
t litt
le to
wn
of
Anac
onda
, mak
e su
re to
sto
p in
to J
FK
BA
R!
Shuf
flebo
ard,
ju
ke b
ox
, che
ap b
eer &
frie
ndly
loca
ls m
ake
JFK
Bar a
fun
plac
e to
spe
nd a
co
uple
hou
rs!
Mic
hael
Keat
on
live
s ju
st o
utsi
de o
f Liv
ings
ton
whi
ch is
pre
tty n
eat,
I sup
pose
.
Min
t Bar
s: L
ivin
gsto
n, L
ewis
ton,
Big
San
dy, W
hite
hall,
Chi
nook
, Tow
nsen
d, L
ibby
, Bel
grad
e, M
alta
, Oph
eim
,W
hite
Sul
pher
Spr
ings
, She
lby,
Fro
id, M
artin
sdal
e
LI d
on’t
know
too
muc
h ab
out t
hose
LEW
IS
AN
D C
LA
RK
guy
s ot
her t
han
they
wer
e ex
plor
ers
and
they
had
to w
alk
ever
ywhe
re,
but e
very
thin
g in
Mon
tana
is n
amed
afte
r th
em. D
on’t
eat a
t “C
lark
& L
ewie
s” in
Gre
at
Falls
. It’s
real
bad
.
MIf
som
eone
tells
you
to m
eet t
hem
at t
he
MIN
T B
AR
, mak
e su
re to
ask
them
whi
ch o
ne,
as th
ere
are
at le
ast 1
5 di
ffere
nt M
int B
ar’s
in
Mon
tana
, and
they
’re a
ll aw
esom
e. S
o w
hy is
th
e M
int B
ar s
uch
a po
pula
r bar
nam
e? B
ack
in
the
min
ing
boom
day
s, th
e M
int i
s w
here
all
the
min
ers
& ra
ilroa
d w
orke
rs w
ould
han
g ou
t!
D
id y
ou k
now
ther
e ar
e 9
NAT
ION
AL P
AR
KS
in M
onta
na?
Ther
e ar
e. B
ig H
orn
Can
yon,
Bi
g H
ole
Nat
iona
l Bat
tlefie
ld, G
laci
er N
atio
nal
Park
, For
t Uni
on T
radi
ng P
ost,
Lew
is &
Cla
rk
His
toric
al T
rail,
Gra
nt-K
ohrs
Ran
ch, N
ez P
erce
His
toric
al P
ark,
Gla
cier
Nat
iona
l Par
k, a
ndYe
llow
ston
e!
Ok,
ther
e ar
e a
lot o
f gre
at P
thin
gs to
dis
cuss
.
O Q
Firs
t and
mos
t im
porta
nt P
on
my
list g
oes
toP
IAN
O P
AT
! Pat
pla
ys th
e or
gan
at th
e Si
p N
Dip
in G
reat
Fal
ls, a
nd is
the
real
sta
r of t
hat
Mer
mai
d Sh
ow, i
n m
y op
inio
n. S
he’s
old
and
awes
ome,
and
whi
le w
e’re
on
the
topi
c of
the
Sip
n D
ip, i
f you
boo
k in
adv
ance
you
can
pay
$100
and
sw
im w
ith th
e m
erm
aids
! Gro
ss.
In m
y lo
ng li
fe o
f bei
ng a
live,
the
best
bar
na
me
that
I ha
ve e
ver c
ome
acro
ss is
cal
led
PIS
SER
S P
ALA
CE in
But
te. I
t is
ever
y bi
t as
good
as
you’
d th
ink
it w
ould
be
with
that
nam
e. Th
ere
is a
tow
n ca
lled
Pr
ay
that
you
can
buy
for r
eal c
heap
. The
who
le to
wn!
And
Jef
fBr
idge
s liv
es th
ere!
(I’m
not
sur
e w
hy J
eff
Brid
ges
does
n’t j
ust b
uy th
e to
wn,
you
kno
w?)
Ther
e is
a to
wn
calle
d P
ra
y th
at y
ou c
an b
uyfo
r rea
l che
ap. T
he w
hole
tow
n! A
nd J
eff
Brid
ges
lives
ther
e! (I
’m n
ot s
ure
why
Jef
fBr
idge
s do
esn’
t jus
t buy
the
tow
n, y
ou k
now
?)
This
P is
my
fave
- T
he P
ek
in N
oo
dle P
ar
lo
r!
is A
mer
ica’
s O
ldes
t Chi
nese
Res
taur
ant!
Foun
ded
in B
utte
in 1
911,
this
pla
ce s
till c
onta
ins
all o
f it’s
orig
inal
furn
ishi
ngs,
incl
udin
g ch
airs
, ta
bles
& d
ishe
s. L
ocat
ed in
But
te’s
old
Red
Lig
htD
istri
ct th
ere
are
som
e pr
etty
goo
d st
orie
s ab
out
the
nood
le p
arlo
r dou
blin
g as
a b
roth
el!
The
stat
e m
otto
is “ O
ro
y P
lata
” whi
ch is
Sp
anis
h fo
r gol
d &
silv
er -
two
of th
e m
iner
als
that
gav
e M
onta
na it
’s n
ickn
ame.
(See
“T”)
P P P P
I jus
t gav
e yo
u fo
ur P
’s, s
o I’m
goi
ng to
ski
pov
er “Q
”.
R S
T \U V
Sort
of li
ke h
ow th
ere
are
so m
any
Min
t Bar
s,th
ere
are
also
a w
hole
bun
ch o
f bar
s na
med
ST
OC
KM
AN
S b
ar
. At
leas
t 12,
acc
ordi
ng to
G
oogl
e. T
he S
tock
man
Bar
s ar
e na
med
af
ter a
ll th
e ca
ttlem
en th
at w
ould
han
g ou
tth
ere!
Mon
tana
is k
now
n as
the
TR
EA
SU
RE S
TAT
E
beca
use
of it
’s ri
ch m
iner
al re
serv
es. T
he
mou
ntai
ns o
f Mon
tana
hav
e ye
ilded
fortu
nes
ofsi
lver
& g
old
sinc
e th
e m
id 1
800’
s!
I’ve
neve
r driv
en th
roug
h M
onta
na w
ithou
t the
high
way
s be
ing
UN
DER
CO
NS
TR
UC
Tio
n.
So s
tay
fuel
ed u
p an
d m
ake
sure
you
hav
e lo
ts o
f sna
cks!
Ther
e is
a g
reat
bar
cal
led
the
Silv
ersp
urSa
loon
and
it’s
loca
ted
in V
AU
GH
N. N
ot m
uch
else
is lo
cate
d in
Vau
ghn,
thou
gh.
Pict
ure
it - M
ingu
sville
, sum
mer
of 1
884.
Th
eodo
re R
oo
sev
elt
arri
ves
at N
olan
’s H
otel
afte
r man
y da
ys o
f rid
ing
thro
ugh
East
ern
Mon
tana
. It w
as la
te a
nd h
e ne
eded
a ro
om.
One
of t
he b
ar p
atro
ns w
as d
runk
and
sho
otin
gof
f his
gun
s, a
nd h
e ca
lled
Roo
seve
lt “F
our
Eyes
” reg
ardi
ng h
is g
lass
es (l
ol).
Roo
seve
lt,
bein
g a
very
ski
lled
boxe
r, en
ded
up k
nock
ing
the
guy
out,
taki
ng a
way
his
gun
s, a
nd lo
ckin
ghi
m in
a s
hed!
WX
Y\Z
Rem
ember I m
entioned all those Mint Bars?
One of them
is in WH
ITEH
ALL. It burnt dow
na few
years ago, but it has been rebuilt. Thereis a bartender there nam
ed Bobbi who has a
photo album on her phone of all the patrons
who have passed out at her bar.
Cajun food in M
ontana seems w
eird, but C
afe Zy
dec
o is so good! Gum
bo, jambalaya,
shrimp & grits, po’boys! You can find C
afeZydeco in M
issoula, Billings, Bozeman &
Helena!
YELLO
WS
TO
NE, but not the park, the river.
Yellowstone R
iver is the last free-flowing river
in the lower 48 states. As it flow
s through MT,
it sees many different landscapes, from
deep-w
alled canyons to wide & lazy farm
land.
Do you know
what X
EN
AG
OG
Y means? It
means like a guidebook sort of thing. This is
sort of like a Montana guidebook kind of?
So there you go. X is for Xenagogy.
YOU Gotta \know whenTO FOLD 'eMHOW
download & print the PDF on a regular piece of 8.5” x 11” paper, and follow these easy steps to fold into a tiny six-page book!
page 1
So go! Drive safe! Be nice! Have fun!
TORRINGTON GOPHER HOLE MUSEUM208 1 ST S, Torrington(403)631-2133Definitely worth the detour to go see Torrington’sonly attraction! This little museum features 75+ taxidermied gophers, dressed in their finest outfits,displayed in the most amazing diorama scenes. Admission is the best $3 you’ve ever spent, and there’seven a gift shop. Don’t forget to read through the guestbook which includes letters from visitors from all overthe world. When driving through the town, take note ofthe fire hydrants which have all been painted to look like, you guessed it, gophers.
Rowleyghost town pizza partYIf you find yourself with an open schedule on the lastSaturday of the month, head over to Rowley for someghost town good times! Sam’s Saloon swings open their doors around 5pm and people come for miles for one of their famous pizzas. Expect to wait a littlelonger than usual for your pie, (yes, it gets THAT busy) but have no fear - the beer is cold & the crowdis friendly! Next pizza night is scheduled for June 24,followed by July 29. Follow @RowleyAlberta on FBfor more details.
Torrington
Sam’s Saloon, Hamlet of RowleyStarland County
kneehill countyBLERIOT FERRYAB-838, Kneehill County
(403)631-2133Operating from late April to early November, this ferry
is the best. It’s basically just a giant piece of wood
that you drive onto and then it takes you to the other
side of the Red Deer River and the whole trip takes
about 2 minutes. But it’s an awesome 2 minutes.
DRUMHELLER!
THE FERRY
BASICALLY
TAKES YOU TO
Depending on which side of the ferry you get off on,make sure you stop and check out the views & stuffat Horsethief Canyon on the East Bank of the RedDeer River. Rumor has it that back in the day, horsesbeing smuggled illegally between the United States and Alberta were supposedly hidden in this canyon!
Drumheller is famous for a lot of things, so I’m not
going to bother elaborating on things like:
the Royal Tyrell Museum, The World’s Largest
Dinosaur, Bernie & the Boys Burgers (as seen on
Diners, Drive-In’s + Dives) or that man who sits on
the bus bench and will take you on a ghost tour.
You can google that stuff.
The Little ChurchNorth Side of North Dinosaur Trail, between the Royal Tyrell Museum &the Golf Course.Built in 1968 as an actual place of worship, the signbeside this little white church says “Seating 10,000people, 6 at a time.” With 6 one-person pews, this 11 foot tall x 7 foot wide church is a pretty cute photo-op stop!
Drumheller & area All of this stuff is either in Drumheller, or super close, like 20 minutes driving time.
ATLAS COAL MINE
110 Century Drive W, East Coulee
Atlas Coal Mine is a National Historic Site, and home
to the country’s last standing coal tipple. The Atlas is
is the last mine standing out of 139 that used to rule
the valley. It’s truthfully not much to see, but if you’re
into history & stuff you’ll probably think it’s cool.
Longbranch Saloon1606 N. Dinosaur Trail, Drumheller (403)823-6788This bar is the perfect place to stop and grab a beerafter a hot motorbike ride through the Badlands. Bellyup to the bar and get yourself a cold one, then relaxon the patio or try your luck on the VLT’s. The decor is the perfect amount of western kitsch, andthe washrooms are fully stocked with whatever youneed to freshen up/fix your helmet hair!
STAR MINE SUSPENSION BRIDGElook for the sign along East Coulee Road near RosedaleThis bridge is my nightmare because I don’t like thingslike this. Regardless, I have carefully crept along all 117 meters of this terrifying contraption quite a fewtimes, because I am a good friend and waiting in the car seems rude. Built in 1931, this bridge was used by coal miners to get to the mines, (I made that up, but I’d imagine that’s why.) PS - once you get to theother side it’s nothing special over there either. Everyone I go with loves it, so you may as well go.
rosedalein the 2016 census, Rosedalerecorded a population of 313.
Asteroid 163 Centre Street, Rosedale (403)823-2205This is the place that looks like a real-life bouncy castle? Do you know the one I mean? It seems like it’s always closed, but it’s seasonal, so if you do happen to rip past and notice it’s open, turn around and go back. Theirburgers are pretty good!
TOP ROCKER11 - 2 Ave North, Rosedale, (403)823-GEAR The roads of the Badlands were made for motorbiking, and Top Rocker is here to take care of any gear you might need during your ride. Leather? Check. Helmets? Check. Oil? Check. Beer? Check. Burgers? Check. Great place for a patio pit stop!
wayne11 BRIDGES TO WAYNEOn your way from Rosedale to Wayne, take note of the 11 one-lane metal bridges that span approx 6km of thesedusty roads. The bridges were built to transport coal to thelocal mining communities, and are in the Guinness Book of World Records as the most bridges found in the shortestdistance.
LAst chance saloon555 Jewel Street, Rosedale (403)823-9189The Last Chance Saloon is my favourite place in Alberta.The beer is cold and served in quart sealers, and the staffis the best. Roll up on any given weekend in the summerand expect to be surrounded by bikers stopping in for a quick bite mid-ride. Think you might partake in more than a couple beers? Inquire about a room upstairs* - for around$70 you can stay in a clean theme room (I’ve stayed in allof them and highly recommend the Honeymoon Suite - laya couple blankets down in the clawfoot tub and you’ve gota whole extra bed for someone!) or pitch your tent right out back! Check their Facebook page for live band listings,and be sure to check out their annual music festival, Waynestock which runs from Sept 1 - 4 this year!(*Rumour has it the hotel is haunted, but in all my nights spent there, the only paranormal activity I’ve witnessed was coming out of the bedroom of another guest who hada little too much to drink, but as far as ghosts go, I’ve never seen any.)
Oh! Try to sweet-talk one of the staff into playing the Band Box for you. It’s one of only two in Canada, and the little creepy dolls pop out of the curtains and play Benny Goodman selections from the Big Band Era! Totally weird.
homeward boundThere are a couple different ways to head back to Calgary,but my favourite way is this way.
HORSESHOE CANYONAlong Hwy 9As you might be able to tell, I prefer seedy saloons overstunning scenery, but even I am impressed by the viewsat Horseshoe Canyon. For like, 5 minutes. Then it’s timeto hop back in the car and head to Beiseker.
beisekerFirst of all, Beiseker is awesome because the village slogan is “Crossroads to the Future.” What? Second of all, the village mascot is a skunk named Squirt.
SQUIRT485 4 Ave, Beiseker, (403)888-9730The Squirt statue is 13 feet tall and it is the cutest roadside mascot you will ever see, except for maybe that giant blueberry in Oxford, Nova Scotia. It’s located inside the Beiseker campground, so take a drive by tosay Hi to the not-so-little guy!
LAZY Ace saloon610 Hwy 9, Beiseker, (403)947-3300
If you’re itchin’ to hit just one more saloon before home,
this is your place! They’ve got beer, they’ve got VLT’s,
they’ve got surprisingly awesome food that comes from
the place next door...which I think is also a gas station
but who cares - the food is great!
Hello, fellow adventurers!
Summer is here which means it’s time to get outtatown! Gather up your funnest friends, put together the perfect playlist, and hit the road!
Already used up all your vacation days? Don’t worry!Alberta has plenty of places to visit that will have you out, about & home by the time you need to be back at your desk.
This little issue will be taking you East from Calgaryand into the Badlands, but not just your typical Dinosaur-Museum-and-hike-through-the-hoodoosBadlands. Not that there’s anything wrong with that,but there’s so much more to see & drink out there!
page 1 page 2
page 3page 4page 5page 6
page 7
Good Times
1 2 3this is what your piece of
paper should look like. fold it in half.fold it in half
the other way.
fold it in half two moretimes so you have 8 sections.4
get a blade and slice the pagein the middle. look at the picture
so you don’t screw it up!5
fold it in half and push edgestowards the middle so the sliced
part opens up like a diamond.6
keep pushing theedges together until
the diamond does a weird thing and
looks like this
7
now you gottatry to sort of �atten
it out and push itdown like a little
booklet. pay attentionto the page numbers,that will help for real.
8
now it should looklike a book! go overthe creases to makethem sharp. I use a
boning tool (best name) but you
can use anything that’skinda hard/soft.
9Good Times
summer 2017
ok! that’s it! you’re done! now put it in your wallet or your
bag and have it ready for the next time you’re itchin’ to get outta town!
COWBOYTRAIL
guideA z
I
MONTANA
guideA z
I
MONTANA
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