Customs and Traditions
Marriage by CaptureMarriage by CaptureThe bride is captured by the groom or his
tribe/clanMay be as a result of war
Marriage by PurchaseMarriage by PurchaseGroom (or his family) pays the bride’s family
a price to acquire her = “brideprice”Or
The Bride’s family pays the groom or his family to marry their daughter = “dowry”
In either situation the money is generally for the use of the women to support her if her husband dies
Marriage for ChoiceMarriage for ChoiceThe Bride and Groom choose one another
freelyMarriage for choice does not necessarily
imply that the marriage is for love
Where Does the Christian Wedding Ceremony Originate?
Christian wedding customs draw heavily from the traditions of ancient Israel and ancient Rome
Ancient Jewish Ancient Jewish WeddingsWeddingsThe Bride was the center of the ceremonyJewish weddings took place in the home of
the Bride
Betrothal:Arranged by the fathers who also settled the
amount of the dowryKetubah agreed upon and signed – at this point
the couple was legally married but did not live together
Usually the betrothal period lasted for a year
The Wedding:Groom and his
friends processed from his house to the home of the bride
Bride was then escorted by her parents and bridesmaids to the groom’s house
The bride and groom sponsored a large feast for family and friends – this could last for several days Wedding at Cana
John August Swannson
Ancient Roman WeddingsArranged by fathers of bride and groomBetrothal – a promise to marry made before
relatives and friends. The bride received a ring as part of the ceremony
Ancient Roman wedding ring
Before the wedding ceremony, the bride offered her toys at an altar to the family gods
Brides wore a white dress with a red or orange veil crowned with flowers
Bride was presented to the groom by her matron of honor
Priests offered a sacrifice to ascertain if the marriage would be happy and fertile
Wedding contract was read aloud
Bride’s family hosted wedding party
Bride and groom were escorted to groom’s house
Early Christian Early Christian WeddingsWeddingsFollowed the Roman practice but omitted
customs not compatible with Christian moral teachings
Forbade divorceCouple was usually blessed by their parish
priest on the Sunday following the ceremony – origin of the Nuptial Blessing
Weddings in the Early Weddings in the Early Middle AgesMiddle AgesAfter Fall of Roman
Empire, the Christian Church began to register marriages in parish books
Became more common for the wedding ceremony to take place at the parish church rather than at home
Religious symbols began to have a larger role in weddings
The priest became the official witness that the marriage had taken place – but the sacrament was performed by the couple
A couple could exchange vows privately without any witnesses
The wedding ceremony was always followed by a banquet
Weddings in the Late Weddings in the Late Middle AgesMiddle AgesMarriage was a legal affair which united two
familiesThe custom began of the parents “giving the
daughter away” as part of the Church ceremonyA dowry was importantThere were no special wedding clothes – but
white was not worn by bridesBrides never wore veils – they wore their hair
loose with perhaps a wreath of flowers over itThe exchange of vows took place on the church
porch, followed by Mass inside the church
GiftsThe bride provided a
dowryShe also provided the
linens and other essentials for the home
The groom provided the home
It was a tradition for the groom to offer the bride a gift on the morning after the wedding – usually a piece of valuable jewelry
RenaissanceRenaissance
Botticelli’s Wedding Banquet
Protestant Protestant ReformationReformation
The Reformers did not consider marriage to be a sacrament
In response, the Council of Trent emphasized the sacramental aspect of marriage and its indissolubility
Wedding of Martin Luther and Katharina von Bora
Post-Tridentine Post-Tridentine CatholicismCatholicismFor a marriage to be
valid, the exchange of vows must occur before a priest and two witnesses
Catholics and Protestants marrying one another cannot get married in a church ceremony
The Engagement PeriodOriginally an engagement lasted between 9
and 12 monthsThis as to insure that the bride was not
pregnant by someone other than the groom
Engagement RingsMedieval – to show the woman now “belongs”
to the man860 AD Pope Nicholas I decreed that the
engagement ring must be part of the betrothal process. The ring should be valuable enough to signify the serious intention of the groom to go through with this marriage.
Diamond Engagement RingsAncient Romans
believed that diamonds were sacred to Venus, the goddess of love
The first known diamond engagement ring was given to Mary, Duchess of Burgundy by the Holy Roman Emperor Maximilian I in the 16th century
Wedding RingsOriginated in ancient Egypt as a symbol that
marriage is foreverRomans originally used rings made of iron;
switched to gold or silver in 3rd century ADThe custom of placing the ring on the fourth
finger of the right hand is ancient – there was a belief that a vein went from that finger directly to the heart
This is not a universal custom – many Europeans place the ring on the right hand, as do members of the Orthodox Church
Bridal ShowerIn the Middle Ages, the bride was expected to
provide household linens and other goods when she married – prior to her wedding her friends would gather to help her complete the sewing of these
By the 1800’s it was a custom to have a party for brides where her friends gifted her with the things she needed to provide for her home
A tradition says that the term “shower” came from a party where the bride’s friends put gifts into an umbrella then opened it over the bride so that the gifts “showered” down onto her
Bachelor PartyOriginated in ancient
Sparta where men lived in barracks with their comrades
On the night before his wedding, his friends gave him a party to wish him good luck
It gave the groom one last opportunity to be with his friends and swear them continued allegiance
White Wedding Dress
Ancient Greeks brides wore white – as did all members of the wedding party. White symbolized joy.
Roman brides wore whiteThroughout the Middle Ages, brides wore any
color they wished, although wedding clothes for both the bride and groom often were banded in blue which symbolized loyalty
Anne of Brittany (1499) was the first bride since ancient times to wear a white dress – but the custom did not catch on
Queen Victoria of England wore a white dress for her marriage to Prince Albert in 1840 – this set a trend and white dresses became popular from this time on Queen Victoria
Wedding Portrait
Wedding Veil
Roman brides wore a red, orange or yellow veil which was believed to chase away evil spirits who were attracted to weddings
Ancient Jewish brides wore a veil to symbolize the purity and modesty of the bride and that no man other than her new husband had the right to see her face
In many ancient cultures, married women always were veiled in public – wearing a veil was symbolic of being married
In the Middle ages, brides wore their hair loose at their weddings without any covering as a symbol of their virginity
The wedding veil became popular in the 19th century
According to legend, George Washington’s grand-daughter Nellie Custis was the first to wear a lace veil at her wedding to Lawrence Lewis Eleanor Custis Lewis
Weddings on SaturdayEarly Christians married on SundayEnglish Puritans believed it was
inappropriate to marry on Sunday, because it was the Lord’s Day
Most Puritan weddings took place on Saturday – and this custom became widespread in the United States
Giving the Bride AwayThrough the 18th century this was symbolic of
the woman’s change of ownership – from her father to her husband
In some cultures and religions both the bride and groom are escorted to the altar by their parents – symbolic of their beginning a new family
The Bride Standing on the Groom’s LeftFrom when marriages were commonly by
capture or in the Middle Ages when someone else might try to capture an heiress before her wedding
It enabled a right-handed groom to easily reach his sword if anyone objected to the wedding
BridesmaidsIn ancient Rome, a
bride had 10 of her friends who dressed similar to her to confuse evil spirits
In Middle Ages they helped the bride at the wedding
In Britain, the bridesmaids are young girls – usually relatives of the bride
English bridesmaids
FlowersBrides have carried flowers in almost all
cultures and time periodsSometimes the flowers have symbolic
meaningsThe groom’s boutonniere is a carry-over from
the Medieval practice of a knight wearing his lady’s colors to display his love for her
Throwing the Bouquet and GarterIn ancient Rome,
anything touched by the bride on her wedding day was considered to be lucky
The custom of throwing a garter (Medieval women had several – they held her stockings up) was to keep the men from tearing them off because they were considered good luck!
The Wedding CakeIn Ancient Roman wedding ceremonies the bride
and groom shared a wheat cake that had been blessed by the priests – this was to insure fertility
In the Middle Ages guests brought small cakes to the wedding and piled them on a table – the bride and groom were urged to reach across the cakes to kiss one another
In England, wedding cakes are traditionally fruitcakes – the nuts and dried fruits symbolize fertility
Cutting the wedding cake together symbolizes the shared future of the newly married couple
Typical Medieval Wedding Cake
Throwing Rice or Flower PetalsSymbolizes fertilityWhat is thrown
varies by culture:Rice = ChinaWheat = northern
EuropeHard candy – ItalyNuts – Eastern
Europe
Carrying the Bride over the ThresholdAncient = remnant
of a time when many brides were captured
Europe – unlucky if the bride stumbled the first time she entered her new home
The HoneymoonIn the Middle Ages, the bride and groom
often did not know one another well before their marriage, so this was a chance to get to know one anohter
Since Biblical times, a newly married couple were given time away from societal obligations (mostly military for the man) to begin a new family
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