You can control your gambling - NSW Gambling Help€¦ · 1. You can control your gambling Most...

You can control your

gambling

4029_GH_PocketGuide_A6_FA.indd 3 14/05/10 1:08 PM

Contents

1.Youcancontrolyourgambling 4

2.WhydoIgamble? 11

3.HowcanIcutback? 16

4.HowcanIstopgambling? 32

5.Thefuture 40

6.Whatotherhelpisavailable? 45

7.Forfamilyandfriends 49

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1. You can control your gambling

Mostpeoplegambleatonetimeoranother.ItmaybeattheTAB,onlotto,onthepokermachinesorinacasino.Formostpeople,gamblingisfun,entertainingandachancetowinabitofmoney.

Ifgamblinghasstoppedbeingfunforyouandstartedtofeellikeaproblem,thisworkbookcanhelp.It’sforanypersonwhoisspendingtimeandmoneygamblinginawaythatisharmfultotheirspouse,friends,familyorworkcolleagues.Ifyouwanttocheckwhetheryouareaproblemgambler,askyourself:

“Am I always in control of how much I spend

on gambling?”

“Is the time and money I spend

gambling hurting anyone else?”

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This workbook can help if:

•youwanttolearnmoreabouttheimpactofgamblingonyourlife

•youhaveagamblingproblemandhavemadeupyourmindtodosomethingaboutit

•youwanttoenjoyproblem-freegambling,or

•youwanttostopgambling.

5


How this book can help

Thisworkbookasksyoutofillininformationaboutyourself.Onceyoudothat,itstopsbeingjustabookandcanbecomearealhelp.Everysuggestioninthisworkbookhasbeenputtherebecauseitcanhelpwithgamblingproblems.Theideascomefromyearsoflisteningtogamblerstalkingabouthowtheycoped,aswellasfrombooksaboutgambling.

Togiveyourselfafairgo,youshouldplanonworkingatyourproblemfortwelveweeks.Whenyou’vegotthatfar,seewhatyou’veachievedanddecidewheretogofromthere.

Gothroughthestepsinthebookcarefullyandslowly.Evenifitworksreallywellforyoudon’tthrowtheworkbookaway.Keepitsomewheresafesoyoucancheckouthowyou’regoinglateron.

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How bad can problem gambling become?

Beforewelookatwaystomanagegamblingit’simportanttohaveareallyclearideaofhowseveregamblingproblemscanbecome.Theharmcausedbygamblingcanimpacton:

Emotions

Youcanfeelanxiousordepressedwhenyouarelosingalotofmoneyandjugglingbills.Havingtolietofriendsandfamilytocoveruplossescanleaveyoufeelingisolatedandalone.

Money

Whengamblinggetsaholdonyou,youcanlosemoneymuchfasterthanmostpeoplecanearnit.Borrowingdelaysthedisasterbutdebtmakesthedrivetogambleevenstronger.

Work

Workperformancesufferswhenyou’reworryingaboutgamblinglosses,debtsandlies.Sometimesyoufeelsobadyoucan’tgotowork,orgambleinsteadofworking.

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Somepeopleevenenduptakingmoneyfromtheirwork,withpossiblelegalconsequences,orborrowingfromworkmates,whichcanleadtoconflictifyoucan’trepayintime.

Family

Relativesgetcaughtinabind;theywanttosavethegamblerfromlosingajob,beingtakentocourtetc.,buttheyarefedupwithlendingmoneyandnevergettingrepaid.

Social life

Peoplewithgamblingproblemshavelittletimeforsocialisingandoftenlosefriends.

Am I a problem gambler?

Sometimespeoplewithgamblingproblemsarereferredtoasbeingilloraddicted.Whenitcomestousingthisworkbook,thelabelsdon’tmatteraslongasyouacceptthatyourgamblingisaproblemandunderstanditiswithinyourpowertochangethatproblem.Ifyou’restillnotsurewhetheryouhaveagamblingproblem,tryansweringthefollowingquestions:

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Tick the boxes below, truthfully as you can, about your experiences over the last 12 months

1. Sometimes I’ve felt depressed or anxious after a session of gambling.

Yes,that’strue No,Ihaven’t

2. Sometime I’ve felt guilty about the way I gamble.


3. When I think about it, gambling has sometimes caused me problems.

Yes,that’strue No,ithasn’t

4. Sometimes I’ve found it better not to tell others, especially my family, about the amount of time or money I spend gambling.

Yes,that’strue No,that’snottrue

5. I often find that when I stop gambling, I’ve run out of money.

Yes,that’strue No,that’snottrue

6. Often I get the urge to return to gambling to win back losses from a past session.

Yes,that’strue No,Idon’t

7. Yes, I have received criticism about my gambling in the past.


8. Yes, I’ve tried to win money to pay debts.


9

EightGamblingScreen–EarlyInterventionGamblingHealthTest–DevelopedbySeanSullivan–GoodfellowUnit–AucklandMedicalSchool


Ifyouticked‘Yes’forfourormoreofthesequestionsthisindicatesaproblem,however,evenifyoutickedoneandarestillunsurewhynotfindoutmore?

Togetfurtherhelp,orifyouarestillunsurewhetheryouhaveagambingproblem,pickupthephoneorlogontoourwebsite,anonymouslyifyouprefer.

Do I need to give up gambling?

Somepeoplewhoareproblemgamblerscanreturntoacontrolledlevelofgambling.Howevermostpeopleprefertoabstain,orgiveupgamblingforgood.Therearenorulesfordeterminingwhetheryoushouldreduceorstopyourgambling.Generallyifyou’relosingmoremoneythanyoucanafford,accumulatingdebts,sufferingmentally,physically,and/orsocially,givingupmaybeyourbestoption.

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Why do I gamble?

Peoplegambleforlotsofdifferentreasonsandsometimesthosereasonschange.YoumightgambleregularlyattheTAB‘towinmoney’butjointheMelbourneCupsweepinyouroffice‘tobesociable’.Youmightusuallyplaypokermachinesalonebutshareamachinewhenyougooutwithfamilyandfriends.

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Understandingwhyyougamblecanhelpyouchangeyourbehaviour.Readthereasonsintheboxandcircletheanswerthatappliestoyou.

Why do I gamble?

1. to win money neversometimesregularly

2. for entertainment neversometimesregularly

3. to be sociable neversometimesregularly

4. to make a big win neversometimesregularly

5. to forget troubles neversometimesregularly

6. to escape from problems neversometimesregularly

7. for something to do neversometimesregularly

8. for excitement neversometimesregularly

9. to avoid talking to people neversometimesregularly

Write your own reasons below:

10. neversometimesregularly



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Check your reasoning

‘To win money’, ‘For entertainment’, 'To be sociable’.

Mostregulargamblerssaytheygambletowinmoney,forentertainmentortobesociable.Tickingthesecommonreasonsdoesnotnecessarilyindicateagamblingproblem.

‘To make a big win’.

Quiteafewregulargamblersalsotick‘tomakeabigwin’.Oftenproblemgamblershaveareallybigwinintheirpastthatputsthemthousandsofdollarsinfront.Whentheygetintodebttheythinkgamblingwilldeliveranotherbigwinandsolvetheirmoneyproblems.Ifyouthinkthisway,youshouldbeawareit’sareallydangerousreasonforgambling.Youarechasingyourlossesandthisisasteptowardslosingcontrol.Usepage26toGetYourThinkingStraight.

‘To forget troubles’.

Ifyouregularlygambletoforgetyourtroubles,youareaddingtothem.Theproblemsolvingtechniquesonpage44andtherelaxationstrategiesonpage37canhelp.

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‘To escape from problems’

Ifit’saproblemthatcantbefixed,likeajobyou’vegottoputupwithforthetimebeingorasickrelativeyoumustlookafter,thereareotherwaysofescapingforawhile.Seepage36forideas.

‘For something to do’

Sometimesaproblemgamblerstartsgamblingbecausetheydon’thaveanyinterests,sportsorhobbiestoenjoy.YoumightwanttoworkonotherintereststoFillTheGap(seepage36&37).

‘For excitement’

Peoplewhoregularlygetveryexcitedwhengamblingaremorelikelytolosecontroloftheirlosses.Youmightwanttogetsomelimitsandreducethecashyoucarry.Pages25&34canhelp.

‘To avoid talking to people’

Sometimesit’snaturalandhealthytowanttobealone.Butifyouneverfeeleasyincompanyandgamblingisyourescape,youcanendupfeelingcutoffandalone.Counselling(seepage45)canhelpyoudealwiththesefeelings.

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Aswellasthesereasons,peoplemaygambleasahabit.Thereasonstheystartedhavebeenforgottenandthehabitjustgoeson.Thefollowingchapterscanhelpyoubreakthehabit.

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How can I cut back?

Tell others about your decision

Itiseasiertosticktodecisionsifyoutellotherpeopleaboutthem.Whynotstartbytellingsomeoneimportanttoyouthatyouaregoingtotrytocutbackonyourgambling?

Remember,youneedtochoosecarefullyandtalktopeopleyoucantrustwhenlookingforthesupportofothers.

Wife/Husband YES/NO

Girlfriend/Boyfriend YES/NO

Close friend YES/NO

Parent/Family YES/NO

Other friends YES/NO

Workmates YES/NO

Religious Adviser YES/NO

Which of these people have

you told?

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Stopping or Controlling?

Somepeople,perhapsthosewithasmallerproblemmaybeabletokeepgamblingandcontrolit.However,formanypeopletheonlythingthatwillbeeffectiveistostopaltogether.Youmustbehonestwithyourselfaboutwhethercontrollingorstoppingisthebestoptionforyou.

Ifyoudecidedtotrytocontrolyourgambling,thenyouneedtochangesomeaspectsofyourthinkingandbehaviour.

1. Expect to lose

Ofcourseyouhopetowin–that’spartofthefun.Butberealistic:thegamblingindustrydoesn’texisttomakeyourich!Itexiststoprovideentertainmentandmakemoneyforthosewhorungamblingvenues.

2. Set a budget

Choosetheamountthatyouwillspendperweekorpergamblingsession.Makesureyoucanaffordtolosewithoutitcausingyouhasslesinyourlife.Thensticktoit!Ifyoulose,youwillhavepaidforyourentertainment.Ifyouwin,trynottogiveitall

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backchasinganevenbiggerwin.Takeitaway andspenditonsomethingorotherthangambling.

3. Never chase losses

Thegreatestdangeringamblingcomesfromthemyththatafteralosingstreakawinisinevitable.Evenwhentheoddsare50-50,suchaschoosingredorblackatroulette,runsof25ofthesamecolourhavebeenrecorded.Youwillneverknowwhenalosingrunwillend.Andit’squitelikelyyourmoneywillallbegonewellbeforeitdoes!

4. Stick to your budget!

Keeparecordofwinsandlossesinyourgamblingdiary(p.19).Ifthisshowsyoucan’tsticktoyourbudget,thanyoumayneedtoseriouslyconsiderthenextoption:stopping(p32).

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Write your own gambling diary

Agamblingdiaryhelpsyoutobehonestwithyourselfabouthowoftenyougambleandhowmuchyoulose.Keepingadiarycanhelpyoudevelopself-awarenessandchangesyourbehaviour.Rememberyoudonothavetogambleeverydayorlosemoneyeverysessiontohaveaproblemwithgambling.

Byidentifyingthethoughts,feelingsandsituationsthatoccurbeforeandduringagamblingsession,youcanstarttounderstandthecausesofgambling.Thisknowledgeisimportantifyouaregoingtobreakyourgamblinghabitasitwilltellyouexactlywhattriggerseachepisode.

Remember,youmayhavemadethedecisiontogamblehoursordaysbeforeyouactuallygamble.Gamblingisnotspontaneous;youchoosetodoit…justasyoucanlearntochoosenottodoit.

Differentpeoplecangambleforcompletelydifferentreasonsandthediarycanhelptoidentifythereasonsthatarerelevantforyou.Forexample,whileone

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personmightgambletobearoundotherpeople,ortoescapetheirloneliness,someoneelsemightgambletobeawayfromthepressuresofotherssotheycanbe‘alone’.

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21

DA

TE

4

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yday

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Wha

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runk

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appy

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ted.

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e p

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:

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ere

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inni

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ple


Keep your diary up to date

Onceyou’vesetyourbudgetlimit,keepyourlimit,keepyourgamblingdiaryforatleasttwelveweeks.Ifyougetbehindit’sagoodsignalthatyouarenotreallytakingyourproblemseriously.Tryputtingadiarysheetwhereitcatchesyoureye;onthefridgedoor,byamirror,nexttothephone.Ifyou’vegotsomeonehelpingyou,putitwheretheycanseeittoo.

use your diary to work out danger signs

Usingtheinformationfromyourdiaryyoucanworkoutwhengamblingislikelytobeaproblemforyouandhowtogetitbackundercontrol.

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Youmightfindthingslike:

Gambling is a problem when:

• I’mbored

• Ifeelfed-up/angrybeforeIstart

• Ihavetimetospare

• Ihavemorecashwithme

• Ihavealreadylostalot ofmoney

• IbelieveIwillwintoday;ifI knowa‘surething’orthatthe pokermachineisjustaboutto payout.

•WhenIlosemoneyIcan’tafford

•WhenIlosemoneythatI’ve committedtosomethingelse

Gambling is safer when:

• Ihavecompany

• Iambusy,thinkingabout otherthings

• Ihaveno/littletimetostay

• Ihavesmallamountsofcash

• Idon’ttakemycreditor EFTPOScard

• Itellotherpeopleabout whatI’mdoing

• Idon’tlieabouthow muchIspend

• I’mnotfeelingangry depressedorupset

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Thin

gs

I lik

e ab

ou

t m

y g

amb

ling

:

You

can

use

the

info

rmat

ion

iny

our

diar

yto

wei

ghu

pth

epr

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ndc

ons

ofy

our

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Fill

int

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able

bel

ow:

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gs

I d

o n

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like

abo

ut

my

gam

blin

g:

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Control cash for gambling

Lotsofgamblerskeeptheirlossesundercontrolbykeepingonlysmallamountsofcashonthem.Theyonlytakecashforlunchoradrink.TheyleaveEFTPOScards,creditcardsandchequebooksathomeandtheydonotborrowmoney.Onthedaystheyplantogamble,theydecidedhowmuchtospendandtakeonlythatsumofmoney.AskingyourbanktolowerthedailywithdrawallimitofyourEFTPOScardisalsoagoodidea.

limit the time to gamble

Stickingtoabudgetworkswellwhenyoucombineitwithagamblingtimelimit.Youcanlimittimeby:

•arranginganotherappointmentsothatyoucannotstayatthegamblingvenuelongerthanoriginallyplanned;

•startinglatersothere’slesstimetogamblebeforeracesendorthecluborhotelcloses;or

•havingafriendwithyouwhoyoureallywanttotalktosoyourgamblingdoesn’tgoonnon-stop.

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Get your thinking straight

Problemgamblersoftenendupwithsomeprettystrangewaysofthinkingabouthowmuchtheyloseandhowskilfultheyareatgambling.

Problemgamblershavenoideahowmuchtheywinorloseinthelongtermbuttheybelievetheyareinfront.Theonlywayagamblercanbesurethatheorsheisthinkingstraightwhentheysay‘I’mahead’isiftheirdiaryrecordsactuallyadduptoaprofit.Otherwise,youmustassumethatyouarebehindandmakesureyourthinkingfitsthefacts.Ifyouknowthatyourthinkingiswrongthenpracticesayingstraightthingstoyourself,like:

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•‘Gamblinghasputmeindebtby$2,000’

• ‘EachweekIlose/spendabout$60’

•‘ThemoreIplay,themorelikelyitisthatmyplaywillresultinmelosingoverall’

•Afterarunoflosses,raisingmystakesandbettingonoutsidersisstupid’

Someformsofgamblingareaboutchanceratherthanskill.Regularpokermachinesplayersoftenthinktheyknowwhenamachineisabouttopayout.Butit’simpossibletopredicttheresultwhenthereelsarespunatrandomandthereareseveralmillioncombinations.Ifyouthinkyoucanpredictawinyouneedtogetyourthinkingstraight.

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Whenyoustarttomakechangestoyourgamblinghabits,saygoodthingstoyourself.Thismayseemsillybutwhatwesaytoourselvesisreallyimportant.Ithelpsyouchangeoldhabits.Saythingslike:

• ’I’vesaved$100already.Itreallyis worththeeffort’.

•‘Ifeltreallygoodnotbettingoneveryrace. Iwasmoreskilfulinchoosingmybets’.

•‘It’sgettingeasiertokeepthegambling undercontrol’.

Practical tips for regaining control

Forsomegamblerscuttingoutgamblingistheonlywaytoreallysolvegamblingproblems.Thefollowingtipsmaybeusefulifyouaretryingtocutdowngamblingandreduceproblems.

Gamblingcanbetriggeredoffbythingsyoudo.It’slikeachain,onelinkleadstothenext.IfabarwiththeracingonTVoraclubwithafavouritepokermachineisthebeginningofthechainforyou,thenavoidgoingthereforawhile.Youcanevenexcludeyourselffrompokermachinevenuesandcasinos.IfyouliveinNSW,youhavetherighttoaskapuborclub

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toexcludeyoueitherfromthewholevenueorfromcertainareaswithinit.Inthecaseofclubs,youwillneedtosignaseparatedocumentforeachclub,youmayvisit,althoughyoucanself-excludefromseveralhotelsinonego.YourlocalgamblingcounsellororGamblingHelpServicecanhelpyoucompletethisprocess.Youcanalsoaskthecasinotoexcludeyou.

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For punters

•Checkform

•Neverbelieveinthe‘goodthing’

•WriteoutyourselectionbeforeyougettotheTAB

• Watchtheoddsbutdon’talwayschangeyourbetatthelastminute

•Ifyouaresure,placeyourbetwellbeforethestart

•Don’tbetoneveryrace

•Don’talwaysstayandlisten/watchtherace

•Collectanywinningswhenallracesareoverorthenextday

For poker machine players

•Limityourcashandgamblingtime

•Buysmallamountsofchange

•Don’tmixdrinkingandgambling

•Don’tbelievethefeelingthatyoucan tellwhenthemachinewillpayout

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•Doitforfunanddon’texpecttowin

•Setawinlimit.Makearuletocashoutcreditsabove$100forexample

•Whenyougettothevenue,talktosomeoneanddelayyoursessionfor30minutes

•Takeregularbreaks

•Goonlyatscheduledtimes,whicharepre-planned

Whenyouaretakingpartincasinoorsportsbetting,alwayssetalimitanddon’toverestimateyourlevelofskill.Checkyourbettingdiaryifyouneedareminder.

Summary of main points

Togetgamblingbackundercontrolyoucan:

1.Tellothersaboutyourdecision2.Setlimitsandsticktoabudget3.Keepagamblingdiary4.Useyourdiarytoworkoutdanger signsandplanyourgambling5.Controlyourcash6.Limitthetimetogamble7.Getyourthinkingstraight

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4. How can I stop Gambling?

Ifgamblingiscausingyoualotoftroubleandyouarereallystrugglingfinancially,itmightbebesttogiveitupaltogether.Herearesomeextrastrategiestohelpyoukickthehabit.

Get someone to help you

Don’tbeputoffbythis.Youcandoitonyourownbutasupportpersonmakesiteasier,especiallyifyou’vegotseriousproblemscausedbygambling.Thispersonmightbeaspouse,parent,friendorcounsellor.Onceyouchooseasupportperson,makeadefiniteagreementtoworkontheplansinthischapterwiththem.

Talk about lying

Manyproblemgamblersenduphidingtheirgamblingfrompeoplefromthem.Thisisunderstandableasitishardtoexplaintoapartner,familymemberorfriendsomeofthethingsthatproblemgamblersdo

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tokeeptheirgamblinggoing,suchasborrowingmoneyfromfinancecompaniesortakingcashfromachild’smoneybox.

Whenpeoplelieaboutgamblinganddebts,theymaysometimestrytogambletheirwayoutofdebtsotheywon’thaveto‘comeclean’.Thisusuallysendsthemfurtherintodebt.Comingcleanaboutgamblingwithatrustedpersoncanrelievepressureandprovidethespacetoprepareamorethoughtfulplanforrecovery.

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Lyingisahardhabittobreak.Ifithappenswithyoursupportperson,itstopsthembeingabletohelpyoubecausetheywon’ttrustwhatyousay.Youandyourhelperneedtotalkaboutthisandplanouthowtocope:

•talkaboutsomeoftheworstliesyou’vetold inthepastandtheconsequences

•checkoutwhat’shardesttotalkabout

•understandthatmoregamblingmayhappenandagreetotalkaboutitwhenitdoes

Onelastthingyouhavetoagreewithyourhelper:youmustnotexpectthemtogiveorlendyoucashforanypurpose.Theycan’tdothisandhelpyou.

Control your cash

Somegamblerscangiveitupfairlyeasily.Mostfindthatforquitesometimetheycan’tstopiftheyhavecashintheirpocketandtheclub,TABhotelorcasinoisopen.Manywhostopgamblingtakealotoftroubletogettheircashflowundercontrol.Tickthestepsyoutry:

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35

checklist

nolargesumsofcashkeptinthehouse

carryonlyenoughcashfortheday’sexpenses

wagespaiddirecttosavingsorbankaccount

wagescollectedbyspouse

allaccountsneedtwosignatures

billspaidbyautomatictransfer,chequeorcreditcard

familyandfriendsknowwhatyou’redoingandhavebeentoldnottolendyoumoney

allcashflowis‘visible’onaccountprint-outs

newplanstocontrolcashflowaremadewhenthereisachange,suchasaholidayoranewjob

jobshandlingcashareavoided

askyourbanktolowerthewithdrawallimitonyourATMcardto,say,$100aday


Thismayseemalotofworkbutifyouhaveagamblingproblem,youknowwhatanexpertyouareatgettingholdofcash.Onceyouworkoutasystemthatsuitsyou,youcanrelaxabitasyouhavemadeit‘impossible’togamble.Thereisanotherbenefitifyouareinarelationshipthathasbeenhurtbygambling.Yourpartnerwon’tstarttotrustyoustraightawaybutyoucanexplainwhatyouaredoingandencouragethemtolookataccountstatementsandcheckupforthemselves.

Fill the gap

Problemgamblersmayspend10-20hoursormoreaweekgambling.Theyalsospendalotoftimethinkingandworryingabouttheirgambling.

Whenyougiveupgamblingyouneedtofillthegapitleaves.Therearelotsofwaystodothis:

•planahead

• gettoknowfamilyandfriendsifyou haveneglectedthemwhilegambling

• takeanotherpart-timejob

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• ifyouarealunch-timegambler,gosomewheredifferentwithworkmates,arrangetomeetsomeone,takeasandwichandreadabook,goforawalkorjog

• takeupahobbyorsport

• setshortandlongtermgoals

• lookatotherthingsyoucandoto‘treat’yourself

• makeyourhomeaninterestingplacetobein,withinterestingthingstodo

• starttodothethingsyoumayhavestoppedwhenyoustartedtogambletoomuch

Relax and look after yourself

Givingupwhenyou’vespenthourseachweekgamblingcanmakeyoufeeltenseandirritable.Thiscanfeelevenworsewhenyoustillgointotheplaceswhereyougambled,liketothecluborhotelifyouplayedthepokermachines,orpassaTABorthecasinoonyourwaytowork.

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Learninghowtorelax,gettingplentyofrestandeatingproperlycanhelpyousticktoyourgoalofreducingorgivingupgambling.Youcantry:

Muscular relaxation training

Thisconsistsoftensingandrelaxingeachmusclegroupinyourbodyuntilyoubecomeanexpertingettingridofalltension.Youcanlearnthisskillfromhealthcentrenursesorcounsellorstrainedinthetechnique.Arelaxationtapemightalsohelp.

Exercise

Walking,cyclingswimming,tennis,running,footballandahundredothersportsareagreatwaytorelax.Thinkofsportsyou’vedoneandcouldtakeupagainortryanewone.Tryandfititintoyourroutinesoitbecomesahabit.

Yoga

Thisisanothergoodwaytorelaxandtostopyourmindgoingoverandoverproblems.Findoutwhereayogaclassisheldandgiveitago.

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Meditation

Therearemanytechniquesformeditation.Checktheweboryourphonebookforlocalservices.

Anotherwaytogetusedtonotgamblingistopracticeitinyourheadwhenyouarerelaxed.Yes,that’sright,practicenotdoingit!Forexample,Helencouldpictureherselfgoingintotheclubwithsomefriends,seeingandhearingthepokermachines,havingadrinkandsittingandtalking.Thenshepicturesherselfgettingupandleavingtheclub.IfHelenpracticesthismanytimesinherheaditiseasiertodoinreallife.Acounsellormaybeabletohelpyouwithyourownstrategies.

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5. The future

Busts and setbacks

Problemgamblerscankickthehabit.However,youmustbefairtoyourself.Problemgamblingislikeanaddiction.Itisreallyhardtostoportokeepitundercontrol.Evenifyouhavecarefullyworkedattheideasgiveninthisworkbookyoumustexpectthattheproblemwillcomebackattimes.

Onethingweknowisthatyoucanoftenpredictwhenproblemgamblingwillreappear.Youaremorelikelytolosecontrolwhenyouhavehadbadtimesinotherpartsofyourlifethatmakeyoufeelsad,anxious,angryordepressed.Whenyoufeelthisway,it’schallengingtosticktoyourplans,asyoumayfeelanurgetoborrowsomemoneyandgobacktotheoldhabit.

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When you feel like you might gamble again, or if you do gamble again, there are five things you can do:

• ContactGamblingHelponline,byphoneon1800858858orfacetoface.Formoredetails,pleaseseepage45

•Talktoyourhelperorwriteyourfeelingsandactionsinyourgamblingdiary.Ifyougambled,lookatwhathappenedandseeifyoucanspotwaysofstoppingitnexttime.Lookforthegoodbitstoo

• Controlyourcash

• Fillinthegapwiththenewthingstodo

• Practiceyourrelaxation

Bustscanhappentoproblemgamblersevenayearorsoaftergivingup.Yougetbetteratknowingwhenitcanhappenandmakingsurethatyourplanslimittheharmdone.You’llfindthatifyoulearnfrommistakesyou’llgetmoreconfident.

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Friends can help

Thereisnodoubtthatifyouhavehelpfromyourpartnerandclosefriendsyouaremorelikelytosucceed.Byborrowingmoney,lyingandspendingalltheirfreetimegambling,problemgamblershaveoften‘pushed’theirpartnerorclosefamilyandfriendsaway.Nowthatyouaretryingtokeepyourgamblingundercontrol,makeanefforttoexplainyourproblemtoyourfriends.Mostpeoplecanunderstandtheproblemofgettingaddicted.Onceyoucanadmitthatyourproblemmayhavehurtthem,andyoucantellthemso,thentheywillbebarrackingforyou.

IfyouareshortofthissortofhelpthenyoumaywanttotrygoingtoaGamblersAnonymous.Youmayfindagoodfriendforlife.GamblersAnonymousisnotrunbyqualifiedstaff.Itisaselfhelporganisationandisindependentlyfunded.

Contact details are available through Gambling Help 1800 858 858.

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Become a good problem solver

Ifproblemshappeninotherpartsofyourlife,don’tstickyourheadinthesand.Dowhatyou’vedoneaboutgambling.Lookyourproblemintheeyeandcopewithit.Goodproblemsolvinghasthefollowingsteps:

• Recognisethereisaproblemandlookcloselyatit.Whendoesithappen?Whoisinvolved?Howlongdoesitlast?Whatstartsitoff?

• Brainstormthewaysyoucoulddealwiththeproblem.Writeoutalistandputdowneventhesillyorimpossibleideas.

• Decidewhichisthebestsolutionandtryitout.

• Checktoseeifitworks.Ifitdoesn'tstartagain.

Youcanseethatyouhavealreadydonethestepsforyourproblemgamblingwithabitofhelpfromthisworkbook.Itmakessensetousethesameapproachtoanyotherpartsofyourlifewhereyoumayhaveproblems.

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6. What other help is available?

GamblingHelpisaservicethatassistsproblemgamblersandtheirfamiliesinNSW.Allservicesarefree,highlyexperiencedandcompletelyconfidential.Youcanaccesstheserviceinthefollowingways:

By phone24hoursaday,7daysaweekon1800858858

Face to faceinmostlocationsinNSW.Tofindthenearestcounsellingservicetoyou,lookupthedirectoryatwww.gamblinghelp.nsw.gov.auorcalltheGamblingHelpline.

Gambling Help Onlineprovidescounsellingvialivetextoremail24hoursaday,7daysaweek.Youcanclickthroughtotheservicefromwww.gamblinghelp.nsw.gov.au.

The Gambling Help websitealsocontainsusefulself-helptoolsandtips.

See page 48forhelpinlanguagesotherthanEnglish.

AllGamblingHelpservicesarefundedbytheNSWGovernmentthroughtheResponsibleGamblingFund.

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Gambling-related relationship or marriage counselling

Oftenproblemgamblersneedtoworkhardatrepairingthedamagetheyhavedonetotheirrelationships.Afteryearsofliesaboutgambling,spousesandpartnersneedtore-establishtrust.Manyproblemgamblersandtheirpartnersdecidetoattendmarriageandrelationshipcounselling,knowingiftheycansortouttherelationshipitwillalsosolvetheproblemgambling.Ifyouthinkthisisthemostimportantpartofyourproblem,phoneRelationshipsAustraliaon1300364277todiscusswhattypeofcounsellingmightsuityoubest,andthelocationnearesttoyou.

Gamblers Anonymous (GA)

GAisavoluntarygrouprunbypeoplewhohavehad,orstillhave,problemswiththeirgambling.Theyarenotqualifiedcounsellors.TheyrungroupsthroughoutAustraliawhere,youcangetthehelpandsupportofagroupofpeoplewhohavesimilarproblems.CalltheGamblingHelpLineforagroupnearyou.

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Financial Counselling

Mostproblemgambersneedtosortouthowtoarrangepaymentofdebtsandyetbesurethattheyhaveenoughleftovertoliveon.TheNSWCreditandDebtHotline(1800808488)offersfreefinancialcounsellingtohelpyouregainstabilitywithyourfinancies.

Help in a crisis

Whenproblemgamblersfindthemselvesincrisistheymayfeeltoodepressedoranxioustothinkstraightabouttheirproblems.Dutyofficersathealthcentres,mostGPs,psychiatristsandpsychologistsareusedtohelpingpeopleinacrisis.Ifyoudon’tknowwhotoring,phonetheGamblingHelpLineon1800858858.

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Help in another language

TheNSWGovernmentfundsfacetofacecounsellinginGreek,Italian,Arabic,VietnameseandChinese.ItalsoprovidescounsellinginallotherlanguagesthroughtheMulticulturalProblemGamblingService.

TheGamblingHelpphonecounsellingservicecanalsoarrangeforaninterpreterinanylanguage.Justcall1800858858andtellthemwhichlanguageyouprefer.

PrintmaterialsinmanydifferentlanguagesareavailablethroughtheGamblingHelpwebsite.

Online Information: www.gamblinghelp.nsw.gov.auRemember,problemgamblingcanbebeaten.

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MulTICulTuRAl SERVICES PHONE NO

MulticulturalProblemGambling 0298403767Service(statewideservice)

ArabCouncilAustralia 0297094333

AuburnAsianWelfareCentre(services 0296463695theChinesespeakingcommunity)

GreekWelfareCentre 0295162188

VietnameseCommunityinAustralia 0297275599

Co-As-It(servicesforthe 0292640744Italianspeakingcommunity)


When someone you care about has a gambling problem

Problemgamblingcanaffectfamilymembersandpartnersinanumberofways,manyofthemstressfulanddifficult.However:

1.Therearethingsyoucandotoimprovethesituation.

2.Allofthesupportserviceslistedwithinthisbookletaretheretohelpyouaswell.Pleaseusethemifyouneedto.

How do I know if someone has a problem?

Unlikealcoholanddrugs,signsofproblemgamblingcanbedifficulttodetect.SomeoftheseMAYindicateproblemgambling:

•Timespentatthegamblingvenueorawayfromhome.TimeWITHfamilyseemslessimportant.

•Financialhassleswithbillsfallingbehinddespiteincomebeingadequate.

•Difficultiesinrelationship–moodiness,irritability especiallywhenbillscomein.

•Borrowinglargesumsorthesaleorpawningof householditems.

•Signingupfornewcreditcards.

•Notwillingtotalkaboutmoneymatters.

•Dippingintosavingsoften,butwithnothingtoshowforit.

The Consequences for partners and families

•Legaltroublewhentherearedebtsinbothnames.

•Stressforfamilymembers,includingchildren,thatmaycontributetoanxiety,depressionandphysicalhealthproblems.

•Whentheproblemisdiscovereditmayhaveabigeffectonyourstandardoflivingwellintothefuture.

•Children’sschoolperformancecanbeaffected.


Handling the situation

•Trytoencouragethegamblertoseekhelp.Therearemanyoptions:facetofacecounselling,GamblersAnonymous,GamblingHelp,OnlineCounsellingandmoreinthisbooklet,mostofthemfreeofcharge.

•Donotblameyourself!!Youdidnot“make”thepersongambleandasnotedsignsoftheproblemcanbehardtospot.

•Feelcomfortableaboutseekinghelpandsupportforyourself:

•TalktotrustedfriendsorcallGamblingHelpon1800858858.

•JoinGamAnon–asupportgroupespeciallyforfamiliesandpartners.

•Visitwww.gamblinghelp.nsw.gov.au.Thesitehaslotsofself-help tools,andadirectoryofcounsellorsandservicesinyourarea.

•Seekfinancialorlegalhelpifnecessarytoprotectassetssuchasyourhouse.Limitfurtherdebtthroughactionssuchasindependentbankaccounts,nojointcreditcardsandautomaticpaymentsofbillsfromanaccountthegamblercannotaccess.

Remember:Confrontationisnotlikelytohelp.Takeactionwithcurrentproblemsandworktowardlong-termgoals.Takecontroloffinancestemporarily.

NO MORE BAIlING OuT!

For Friends

Muchoftheaboveadvicecanassistfriendsaswell.It’simportanttoencouragethegamblertoseekouthelp.Don’tlendthemmoneyevenifsayingnoisdifficult.Helpyourfriendstayawayfromgamblingbynotsocialisinginagamblingsetting,orifyoumustmeetthere,helpthemtostayawayfromthegamblingareas.

You can also get help, tips and support from Gambling Help on 1800 858 858.


Now that you have finished the manual it’s a good idea to put it in a safe place to remind you of the good

work you’ve done and just in case you or a friend

needs it again.


ThismanualwasdevelopedfrommaterialsandpublicationsputtogetherbytheVictorianGambler’sHelpcounsellingservices, Professor Mark Dickeron, Ian Robertson andNick Heather. This edition includes text modified by DrCliveAllcockonbehalfoftheNSWGovernment,andwasprintedanddistributedinNSWin2008bytheResponsibleGamblingFund,OfficeofLiquor,GamingandRacingFund,OfficeofLiquor,GamingandRacing.Ithasbeenupdatedagainin2010.

©StateGovernmentofVictoria

See our website www.gamblinghelp.nsw.gov.auforusefulbooks.


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