Writing in the Style of Alice Pung

2016 – Creative Response Guidelines and examples

Selecting some basic principles for your story• Select an Institution: Prison, High School, Primary School, University,

Kindergarten, a bank, Trade school, TAFE, office environment, where you went for work experience.

• Select a gender for your institution: Your institution should be single-sex, all-male, or all-female, as this will allow you to focus on the way that this gender interacts.

• Select a dominant race, background or culture for your institution: For example, an accounting office full of private school males, a football club full of female suburbanites.

• Select a gender for your protagonist: Your choice, they do not necessarily have to be the same gender as the gender of the institution.

• Select a nationality or background for your protagonist: Choose a background you have some experience with, again, it does not necessarily need to be the same background as the dominant race, background, or culture as the institution.

• Think of at least three rather extreme events that will tie your story together, and teach lessons to your protagonist. They should be possible, but unlikely or uncommon for the institutional setting you have chosen. For example, a fight in a football club would not be too uncommon, whilst if it were to take place in the accounting firm that would be uncommon or unlikely due to the setting.

Selecting some basic principles for your story (2)

• Select a person for your story to be written to: Lucy is writing diary like accounts of her year to her former self Linh, who is writing to whom in your story?

• Select a form for your diary like response: perhaps you are writing a series of tweets, post secrets, a blog, Facebook posts, or post it notes back and forward. Or alternatively, just copy the style of Laurinda.

• Describe the routine of the institution that you are going to be exploring.

Activity 1 – Going from a general statement to extended elaboration• Think of a short and pithy truism.

• Women love to talk, Men don’t deal well with emotions, Schoolgirls travel in groups, life is hard.

• Then elaborate on it, using examples from school, or the institution that your piece of writing is set in.

• A truism is a claim that is so obvious or self-evident as to be hardly worth mentioning.

2. Pace• Is the writing heavily descriptive,

with emphasis on setting and atmosphere, or does it focus on action and plot movement?

• The novel Laurinda is very descriptive, focussing on the atmosphere of the school.

• If one were to plot the story of Laurinda, very little would actually happen that would warrant a mention in a more plot-driven book. For example, compare the plot of Romeo and Juliet with Laurinda.

Activity 2: Choose a suburb or place for your story• Select a suburb you do live in, or have lived in. Or a place that you

have visited for more than a month.

• Describe the types of people that you see on public transport.

• Describe the types of houses that are common there.

• Describe the types of families that live there.

• Describe the way that people speak there.

• Describe the fashion, or the clothing that people wear there.

3. Expansive/Economical Diction

• Is the writing tight and efficient, or elaborate and long-winded?

• When does the author use one or the other mode, and why?

• A mixture of both of these, depending on the situation, and purpose of the writing.

• Economical / Sparse writing:

• However, during the various incidents of the school day, the writing becomes simpler, and more precise.

Activity 3: Write a short and precise piece of writing about a dramatic event. • Try to use small sentences during the most active parts of the event, and more

complex, longer sentences when describing the scene, and setting up the event.

• For example:

The room was arrayed with many desks, and there were pens and scraps of paper all over the floor, the carpet was torn, with large holes revealing the under layer peeking through. As the young boy, spectacled, and red-faced entered the room, his head instantly snapped onto the face of the other boy.

“Troy!” he yelled.

Launching himself forward. His body a missile. Launched into the stratosphere.

We all blinked, our eyes glued to the rare sight of a year 7 in flight, mouths agape as we waved our arms, and called out to Troy, who sat, eyes widening, his mouth a maw of surprise.

Crunch. the sound of flesh and bone colliding rung across the room.

• During more descriptive sections:

• The language is very floral and descriptive when discussing aspects of school life, or when describing Stanley, or clothing. Remember you are describing a high school to high school students, or an institution that everyone is already aware of. This means that you need to go beyond the obvious associations to explain the significance of things.

Activity 4: Describe a part of school (or institutional) life.

• Take a whole paragraph, half a page or more. Describe the canteen line, the field at lunchtime, the library before school, the locker area before class begins.

• Include as much detail as possible. Imagine you are David Attenborough, or a sociologist. Observing and noting the patterns, behaviours, and appearance of the students, or members of your institution.

4. Figures of speech• Are there any metaphors, similes, metonymy or symbols?

• Clothing is used as a form of metonymy (a part representing the whole). Linh’s clothes are often described to establish things about her character, similarly, other girls, and boys, can be quickly grouped in this way.

• This excerpt is used to show that Christ Our Saviour was not a strict school, by focussing on one element, uniform.

4. Figures of speech: Metonymy continued• This excerpt shows that Mrs V. dresses weird, to indicate that she is weird,

and to foreshadow the fact that she has other strange behaviours which the students will later exploit.

Activity 5: Symbolic language – Descriptive, observational piece• Choose a setting in your institution (For example, locker-area, canteen

line, boring classroom, sport on the oval).

• Develop the following expressions:

-Metaphor ( __________ is __________).

-Similes ( __________ is like _____________).

-Metonymy (Describe 1 part of a person to describe their nature).

-Adjectives (Write a list of 20 words to describe their appearance).

-Adverbs (Write a list of 10 words to describe their actions).

5. Use of Dialogue

• How often does dialogue tell the story?

• Dialogue is typically set out like this:

• Talking

• Description

• Talking

• Description

With the focus being on the effect of the talking, or the reaction to the talking, as this example shows.

Activity 6: Describe a conversation

• Use a blend of description, what is unsaid.

• Then show what is said.

• Then again describe the unsaid or unspoken communication.

• For example:

• “Hi, mum, great to see you!” she enthused.

• But my fake, Duchenne smile, suggested otherwise. God, I wish I never had to go shopping with her ever again. But, it is worth it for the things I take home.

• “What’s wrong you look unwell?” probed mum. With a look of mock concern, she had long suspected that her daughter was not taking her medication, and so had begun sending letters to her doctor, to ascertain whether or not this was indeed the case.

5. Use of Dialogue - 2

Notably, Alice Pung is not bound by strict rules in regards to adding ____ said after each piece of dialogue.Note the example, where only a minimal amount of these are used. Be cautious that meaning is not lost.

Activity: 7 Develop a list of alternatives to the word ‘said’• Then refer to this list, each time you have to use this expression in

your own writing. Or alternatively, make a substitution for these words at some point in your drafting of your practice piece.

• Use these alternatives for the activity you completed previously.

• Then highlight the ‘said’ statements that you believe you could remove without hurting the coherence of the piece.

6. Point of View

• Possibilities: first, second, third, omniscient, limited omniscient, multiple, inanimate, free indirect discourse.

• Always first person

Activity 8: Write a first person account

• Notably, your character cannot actually be involved, but again, takes the role of a sociologist, or David Attenborough, watching on with interest but not actually involved.

7. Character development

• How does the author introduce characters, and how do we see their evolution in the story? What is their function and motivation?

• What kinds of characters are they? Full/round? Stock characters? Stereotypes? Caricatures?

• The students are fully realised characters, whilst the teachers are only important in the way that their personalities impact upon the students. In this way, your story only needs to fully develop the main character, and a select few of their peer group. Whilst the instruments of the institution are only simple stereotypical, caricatures of their roles.

• Mrs V. is the weird teacher, Ms. Gray is the strong authoritarian, Mrs. Leslie is the caring but unaware mother, and so on. Whilst Linh is a character of distinction, with hopes, dreams, feelings, opinions, and so on.

Activity 9: Develop 1-2 complex characters, develop 1-5 minor, superficial characters. • You need a main protagonist, and 1 main antagonist.

• You also need 1-5 characters who are more simplistic, and are not as developed as the main protagonist and antagonist.

• Complete 1-2 of the “complex character chart”.

• Complete 1-5 of the “minor character chart”.

• Both document available from Compass.

8. Tone

• What is the author’s attitude? What is the mood of the story?

• Does the author seem sarcastic? Aggressive? Wistful? Pessimistic? In love? Philosophically detached? Hopeful? Ironic? Bitter? (And so on...)

• Whatever the tone, where is it visible in the narrative?

• The tone is typically optimistic, but also doubtful and concerned. As Linh states in the book, every event is crucially important, due to her young age. She does not know that in the future these events will have little impact on her sense of self, and will be simply trivial stories to be told at dinner parties.

Activity 10: Assigned tone and Setting

• Assign students a tone word and a setting, using the random picker wheels. They have to describe their selected setting in their selected tone.

• Setting:

• http://www.classtools.net/random-name-picker/35_hfh4ZC

• Tone words:

• http://www.classtools.net/random-name-picker/81_Vb5ZBL

9. Paragraph / Chapter Structure

• Are paragraphs very short, or are they enormous blocks running across many pages?

• Are the chapters short or long? How many are there, how are they organized, and why is this important?

• Each chapter, feature small vignettes, separated by a star / asterix symbol.

vignetteviːˈnjɛt,vɪ-/nounnoun: vignette; plural noun: vignettes1. a brief evocative description, account, or episode."a classic vignette of embassy life"

10. Time Sequencing / Chronology• How has the author organized the chronology of events? To what

effect? What is the work’s structural “rhythm”?

• Every event is chronological, each section is scene that would follow the other. However, not every day, or every event is mentioned, only the very powerful and important scenes.

Activity 11: Time sheet / Timeline

• Write up a timesheet, with each hour recorded. What happens at your institution when.

• You may want to note down areas where there are possibilities of mischief, or misdeeds to occur.

11. Allusions• How and how often does the

author refer to other texts, myths, symbols, famous figures, historical events, quotations, and so on?

• Alice Pung’s Laurinda is full of references to books, TV shows from her time, films, and most often, art works.

Textual references in LaurindaSo much to tell you – John Marsden (Page 48-49)Stand by Me – Rob Reiner (Page 48-49)Romeo and Juliet – William Shakespeare (Page 48-49)The Great Gatsby – F. Scott Fitzgerald (Page 75, 151) Grease - Randal Kleiser(Page 107)The Bible – Ephesian 4:32 (Page 119)Emma – Jane Austen / BBC 1 (Page 130)Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen / BBC 1 (Page 130)Fat Cat and Friends – Australian TV Show (Page 138) Heaven and Earth - Oliver Stone (Page 139, 142)Born on the Fourth of July - Oliver Stone (Page 142)Platoon – Oliver Stone (Page 142)Hermes and the Infant Dionysus (Page 158)Ghent Altarpiece - Hubert van Eyck, Jan van Eyck (Page 160) The Incredulity of Saint Thomas – Carvaggio (Page 185) Dead Poets Society – Peter Weir (Page 240)

Activity 12: Allusions

• Google Image search artworks, for example: “renaissance era art”, then select an artwork. You could look for ‘depressed painting’, ‘joyous painting’, ‘morose painting’, and so on. Find a painting that suits the emotion or feeling you are trying to portray, or vice versa.

• Write a piece of writing that references this artwork and alludes to it, to support the events of your story.

Example: Laurinda – Alice Pung

This example takes place after Lucy has decided not to hang out with the cabinet, or her friend Katie. She has decided to hide in the library and ignore the other students as much as possible. In the allusion, Lucy is Jesus, and the man, Saint Thomas (whose actions give rise to the expression “doubting Thomas”) is Chelsea, who doubts that anyone would want to be alone.

Example: Stańczyk – Jan Matejko

I sat alone in the library, after my fight with Mudather. I had deeply offended him, and I had begun to feel deeply awful about myself. As I slowly leafed through my copy of Polish Art Masterpieces, my eyes fell upon ‘Stańczyk’. I saw my own wrongdoing reflected in his downward turned eyes and slouching repose. And I knew, tomorrow was going to be another hard day at Brunswick Secondary College. (Mr Kolber, best writer, world)

Example – ‘School of Athens’ - Raphael

The university quadrangle was a sandstone cavernous building, with students lounging on the grass, reading books and gesticulating excitedly. Two young men were walking through the corridors, each with laptops under their arms. Like a modern day Plato and Aristotle, they completed the ‘School of Athens’ feel. The snippets of conversation I caught were a reminder that here, in this place, I could really learn the answers to the Big Questions. I hurried off to my first lecture with a thirst for knowledge as deep as the ocean.Karlee Baker. *mic drop*

13. Metafictional techniques

• Does the author call attention to his or her own process of narration?

• Are the narrator’s position, role, and thoughts as a storyteller mentioned explicitly in the text? What function does this serve?

• Most notably, the story contains a dual narrator. Lucy is writing to Linh, who is part of her compartmentalised self.

14. Everyday items as symbols

• All aspects in Laurinda are simple, and common which means that everyone visualises the uniform of their own school. So if you just say, “They wore a school uniform”, everyone thinks about their own schools uniform.

• “I didn’t recognise anyone. The boys seemed handsome-forgettable, but of course I couldn’t look directly at their faces. They all looked desirably good, because they all looked decent, neat and clean. I could understand why some people fall in love with a uniform. These boys’ school uniforms were like suits, not only suggesting their future careers, but also preventing them from getting up to no good, like the boys of Stanley did.”

• Page 206 – Elaborating on the effect of the boys suited uniform.

Activity 13: Choose a feature of your institution

• Describe what it means, how does it position the participants, who is powerful, who is weak, who is talking, who is being spoken to?

• What does it represent, to the people who use it, to the people who are under the control of it?

• In Laurinda, the grounds, the crest, the uniform, are all symbols of aspirations, of goals, of expectations. Which elements are important to your institution?

• Write a list of features, then google image search them to create a collage of important images that relate to your setting.