THE NATIONAL ORCHESTRA OF THEUNITED KINGDOM OF GOATS

e COMPENDIUM

FRAGMENT FIVE

Fiing sist

THE PROPAGANDA OFFICE OF THEUNITED KINGDOM OF GOATS

REVISION 2.2

INTRIGUINGREVEALINGCONFIDENTIAL

- 21 -

Failing to resist

On the fourth day I gave in. I gave in to the nightmares, to

the visions, to the spectres of three days of horror they have

forced my mind to wander through.

Where was I anyway? The heat, the sun and the dry winds

constantly blowing sand into my mouth had gone. The crackling

laughter of the vultures flying above me and the myriad of insects,

creeping up my spine and constantly biting me, had vanished.

Where have they all gone?

I was sitting in a puddle of half thawed snow with the cold,

harsh wind blowing straight into my face. I did not feel my legs,

nor did I feel anything else. My journey had taken its toll, my

willpower was gone. I stared at the ground right before me. I was

sitting here, motionless, for quite a while now. In the midst of a

long deep valley, in the midst of nowhere. To the left and right of

me massive cliffs stood like guards to the vale, probably higher up

than heaven. Dark, foreboding clouds crowned them and left no

place for the suns to break through. I even started wondering if

- 22 -

they ever shone down upon this god forsaken land. On top of the

hills to the right stretched a giant forest. From where I sat, it

looked just as dark and hostile as everything else around here. But

every now and then, my tormented eyes caught a glimpse of light

peering through the dense and thick wood. Not the kind of light

that upon sight makes one rejoice. Nothing whatsoever. It was a

dire and threatening glow, an illumination looking like candles put

up to guard beside a man’s grave. Something told me, I had to go

there. Something was calling me. Maybe it was the light of my own

grave, calling me. I saw strange misshapen figures moving back

and forth behind the trees. Almost as if someone or something

was in there, waiting, watching. Again, I felt them calling me. But

alas, I could not gather the strength to get up at all. It might all just

have been my madness that was playing tricks on me again,

starting to make me lose myself completely.

On a second thought, it could have even been the last chance

I had been given. Not that it mattered. Not for me anymore.

I paused and looked around. There was no path, no tracks

and no road. No footsteps even. I must have lost the way. If I

remember correctly, it had been four or five days I was venturing

through these horrid lands before I sank down right here where I

was now. And nothing had ever changed during my journey.

Neither the landscape, nor my condition did. It was wet. Cold, dark

and wet. I couldn't even remember why I walked at all. Not that I

even knew or cared where I was headed. Oh, the madness.

I let my hands sink deeper and deeper into the cold. In a

sudden outburst of rage and hatred I pushed them down with full

force. I denied the muscles in my arms the much needed relief

- 23 -

from the pressure I was laying upon them. I didn’t even let me

stop as my bony fingers reached the ground deep below the snow.

I could not stop pushing forward even after the nails broke off

from my fingers. The pain, it felt so good. It made me feel alive. I

could almost taste the blood slowly dripping from my fingertips.

Only as my blood began to tin the snow in a light blood-red colour,

I let go. The last bit of energy, my body could still manage

produce, were depleted. Finally my rage passed. I didn’t know

what I was raging at anyways.

Still they were calling me. What if it are the Kramh? I was

one of them. And now they want me dead. I was easy prey out

here. Why play these games?

But I was still here. And I was still fighting their will. I was

still the one they were unable to lay low. But my mangled flesh no

longer carried the ability to put up with what they had thrown in

my way. I had to carry on. I could not allow myself to falter. I had

to push on, wherever this damned valley led me, and however I

came to be here. “The answer must lie ahead,” I thought to myself.

“I must ... push …on.”

But my arms gave way under the weight of my body. Face

down I fell into the snow. The cold weather had long penetrated

the few leather scraps I managed to put together as clothing. My

senses had grown tired of the wet chill that was piercing my skin

for days now. I did not want to allow myself to rest, although I was

desperately in need of sleep. A last bastion of resistance inside me

was vehemently fighting against me capitulating. But now I could

see my spirit break and fall apart, right before my very eyes.

- 24 -

Any attempt to get up failed. The dreams came back. I would

not endure them one more time. I did not have the strength, the

willpower to fight it any more. Slowly I slipped back into the land

of dreams; slowly I fell back into madness. The darkness around

me began to grow. And it grew even more, the longer I fought

against myself giving in. I could see the wall, the first wall of

Kolepta. I could hear the laughter shattering my core. I saw the

giant towers radiating madness, the green glow that shone from

behind the wall, fear in its purest form crept up my bones. The

spectres came back, floating. Oh by the gods, no. Twisted visages

circled around the gates from where the verdant glow pulsated.

The whispers, they were getting louder again. They spoke of

things I do not dare to repeat. They turned and tormented my will.

It started again, it started all over. The dark magic of the wall

attacked again. It all came back. “What can I possibly do against a

force so utterly evil?” I asked myself. “What am I to do in the wake

of my demise? Could this be the end?”

“Let it be, then” I muttered to myself. “If this is how the gods

want me to end, then I will not fail them. I have never failed them,

and I will not do so now.” Death can be salvation. I only prayed

that my body gave up before this vile power could corrupt my

mind beyond redemption. “At least I won’t become one of them.”

The lights over at the woods seemed to fade away and give

up, just as I did.

I must have fallen asleep shortly thereafter.

I must have given in.

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Written and published by

The National Orchestra of the United Kingdom of Goats

(www.ukog.net)

Eternal bliss be yours.