TX Citizen 6.5.14

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  • 8/12/2019 TX Citizen 6.5.14

    1/16

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    omatterhowgoodIget,I'llneverbeasgoodasawall."

    Mitch

    Hedberg

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    F a k e N e w s | O p a E s e l | A s k a M e x i c a n | F i s h , G r i l l e d

    VOLUME THREE

    I S S U E 23

    06 .05 .14

    VOLUME THREE

    I S S U E 23

    06 .05 .14

    PLUS : 7 DAY NEW BRAUNFE LS L IVE MUS IC GU IDE

    PLUS : 7 DAY NEW BRAUNFE LS L IVE MUS IC GU IDE

    Ranger Moneybags Fro l i c s Amongs t the Landa Park Money Tr ees

    F i r s t Word, Page 3

    RANGER

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    TXCITIZEN

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    TXCitizen.

    TXCitizenispublished

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    multiplecopiesfrom

    distributionpoints.

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    0each.

    ST

    AFF/

    CONTACT

    Publisher/Editor-in-ChiefMikeReyno

    lds

    DirectorofDistributionChaseCochran

    ArtDirectorKaylaWa

    llace

    Ed

    itorial:[email protected]

    Ad

    vertising:sa

    [email protected]

    Distribution:

    [email protected]

    PHOTOC

    RED

    ITS

    CoverPhoto

    ChaseCochran

    2 AD SALES 830.358.2493

    table of contents

    7Citizen

    SoundcheckThe ONLY guide of i ts kindfor the NB/SM Metroplex!

    13Hot in the Kitchen

    The TX Citizens Diva of theDish gets her halibut on.

    12The Countys

    Most WantedLook Mommy! Daddys in the paper!

    Ask a MexicanGustavo offends in two languages.

    14Best ofthe WurstResults!

    1st Word The Parks Department

    Money Grab 3

    Advice fromOpa Esel

    Questionable counselfrom Grandpa Karl.

    11

    Fake NewsNews that isnt true.Stop asking.6

    Sound Out of TownBecause Austin and San MarcosSan Antonio occasionally havelive music too.

    10

    Last WordThe VA health care fi asco. 15

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    TXCITIZEN.COM 3

    Sorry, Bruce.Last week, I unfairly referred

    to former Mayor and currentDistrict Judge Bruce Boyer as

    the guy that forced the still

    incomplete Walnut Avenue

    project upon us. Sure, the fiasco

    was authorized during his watch

    as Mayor, but (according to equally former

    Mayor Stoney Williams) he voted against it.

    We got in touch with Judge Boyer, and asked

    him to clarify the situation for us. Heres what

    he had to say, via the electronic mail:

    As I recall I voted against passing

    the bond issuance for the project because I

    believed it should have been put back before

    the voters on a bond election ballot. That

    was because the voters had previously voted

    against the project. And that is still my opinion.I was in the minority on that vote. So no, I did

    not vote to go forward on Walnut without the

    approval of the voters.

    Granted, it was his administration (for

    lack of a better word) and choice of City

    Manager that that did the actual shoving,

    but conscience demands we give Boyer a

    pass on this one. Council members haveshown their contempt for the public on more

    than one occasion, and this situation was no

    different. To the Judge, we apologize for the

    unfair stigmatization and want to thank you

    for giving us a prompt, straight answer. And

    for voting no, for that matter.

    From here on out well place the blame

    for this on the City Council that served with

    you as a whole, rather than you specifically,

    with special contempt heaped upon former

    City Manager Michael Morrison. Henceforth,

    we will refer to the Walnut debacle simply as

    the Morrison Parkway, rather than the Boyer-

    Morrison Parkway. Former Mayor Gale Pospisil,

    however, will still bear full blame for allowing

    City Staff to screw up the project over the last

    three years. Hopefully it will be complete beforeMayor Casteels first term is up in 2017. Hey,

    maybe we should call it the Morison-Pospisil

    Parkway. Yeah, thats got a nice ring

    to it. Lets do that.

    The Parks

    Department loves

    yo money.

    ParkingOver at Parks and Rec, we got action on two

    fronts. First, the parking pass situation hastaken a turn for the worst, as one might have

    expected. When parking fees were reinstated

    for Prince Solms Park, local tennis players

    stormed City Hall to protest. City Council

    came up with a plan to allow parking passes

    to be purchased for $20. Everybody seemed

    happy with that, until it was discovered that,

    while the park is equipped with picnic areas,

    a disc golf course, basketball courts, and riveraccess, that the parking passes are only good

    for people that play tennis. The public at large

    didnt see that one coming.

    At first, the passes were issued without

    photographs. Then pass holders were asked to

    come back to the Parks office to get new passes

    with their photographs on them.

    Of course, the passes are supposed

    to be good for an entire family, not just the

    purchaser. Now the purchaser will need to be

    on the grounds and visible in the tennis area

    to avoid being ticketed. And Rangers will

    need to go to the cars, memorize the faces

    on the passes on the dashboards, go back

    to the tennis area and check off the people

    in the photos.

    Maam, Im going to have to ask you to

    restyle your hair in order for me to compare

    you to the photo I memorized a few minutes

    back at your car.

    Maam, Im going to have to ask you

    to provide me with a photo of your husband

    to compare to the photo I memorized a few

    minutes back at your car.

    Continued on page 5.

    MIKEREYNOLDS

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    Continued from page 3.

    Thats the stupid. Now for the unfair, as

    previously mentioned: The parking pass is not

    valid if you are in the river, having a picnic,

    swimming, playing basketball or disc golf, or

    just walking around.

    Maam, it appears you played disc golf

    and took a walk. Im afraid Im going to have

    to ask you to play some tennis in order to

    avoid a fine.

    Never in the history of history has the use

    of a discount for something been contingent

    on increasedconsumption of a public amenity.

    Never before have parking passes been ruledvalid or invalid on the basis of what the parker

    is doing at any given moment. This is madness.

    PicnickingOn the second front, weve got the picnic

    table thing going on in Landa Park. As you

    might know, theres a $10 fee to use a Landa

    Park picnic table (although the first ones free

    if youre a local). What you may not know is

    that the same $10 fee applies if you bring your

    own table. But wait. Check this out. As usual,

    the City itself doesnt know its own laws. This is

    from the Citys website, emphasis ours:

    Per Article 1. Sec. 86-2 of the City of

    New Braunfels Code of Ordinances, individual

    picnic spacesare available throughout the parksystem on a first come, first served basis. Park

    rangers will collect a $10 per picnic spacefee

    in season. With proof of residency, citizens

    living inside the corporate city limits of New

    Braunfels will not be charged for the first picnic

    space. A picnic spaceis defined as the use of

    one picnic table for the purpose of picnicking

    or for additional setup areaswith table and

    chairs per day.

    So we went and checked Article 1. Sec.

    86-2 of the City of New Braunfels Code of

    Ordinances, and wouldnt you just know it? It

    says something completely different. Theres a

    chart with all the rates for things like the gazebo

    and various permits. There is no provision,

    at all, for a picnic space. Individual picnic

    tables are mentioned at $0 to $10 per. This

    refers to park equipment, like the dance slab.

    Its clear that certain activities and things

    brought into the park require permits, not just a

    fee. Live music, foot races, and inflatable games

    require permits. There is no permit required for

    privately owned tables, per ordinance. There is

    no fee noted for picnic spaces. The City madethat distinction when it passed the law, and now

    the Parks Department is trying to make an end

    run around it. The distinction stands. If a ranger

    tries to charge you for your privately owned

    table, show them the law and tell them to

    #### off. Or Take a hike. They like to hike.

    Much like parking passes that only work

    if you play tennis, charging someone to setup a table on land that would otherwise be

    free (say, for sitting on or playing catch)

    should be considered good for a one-way

    ticket to Crazytown.

    If youd like to check out and print the

    code for yourself, navigate to tinyurl.com/

    nbparkscode, and click on Chapter 86

    PARKS AND RECREATION. And remember,

    dear taxpayer: youve already paid for those

    picnic tables and that parking lot, many times

    over. Might as well enjoy them.

    \m/

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    Chamber Goes-a-WooingNew Braunfels Chamber of Commerce, evereager to bring in new businesses, is offering

    $20 million to coax an insurance companyscalling center to Austin.The company, Red Shoes Inc., claims

    it sells insurance for shoes. The vast sum ofmoney would be used to help build the firma skyscraper in the capital city. The Chamberpromises that the money is well worth it, seeingthat it would bring nine minimum wage jobs tothe area, sort of.

    Its a no-brainer, said Chamberspokesperson Charlene Wanton-Hussy. How

    could we not take the opportunity to bring sucha large, reputable company somewhat nearNew Braunfels?

    I mean, nine jobs are nothing to sneezeat, the spokesperson said. Sure, theyre inAustin, but its a good possibility that at leastone of those jobs could go to a New Braunfelsresident. Its a win-win.

    However, what the Chamber seemed tooverlook is that Red Shoes Inc. is a well known

    collective front that launders money for Somalipirates and Mexican drug lords.When asked if the Chamber had any

    concerns about the criminal element behindRed Shoes Inc., Wanton-Hussy responded thatit wasnt the Chamber of Commerces habit ofinterfering in other peoples business.

    While simultaneously offering $20 millionto pirates and drug dealers, the Chamberalso announced that small businesses in NewBraunfels will now have to submit to public

    whippings and humiliation if those mom-and-pop shops want to continue receiving Chamberprotection. The small businesses will also haveto pay an extra $200 per month for the service.

    Look, were in the business of business,Wanton-Hussy said. If that means beatings andhumiliation, so be it. Were only looking out forwhat is best, financially, for the community.

    Asked if Red Shoes owners will have tosubmit to such treatment as well, Wanton-Hussyreplied, Oh, hell no! Theyre pirates and druglords, for Gods sake!

    When it was pointed out that she previouslysaid she didnt know about Red Shoes criminalactivities, the Chamber spokesperson quicklyhung up the phone, claiming that she wasabout to drive into a tunnel, of which there arenone in New Braunfels. Also, she was speakingfrom the Chambers landline.

    City Appeals AgainIn a fresh example of legal cognitive dissonance,the City of New Braunfels appealed a court rulingin a case that has nothing to do with the City.

    Jim Barnes successfully sued dentist ThadHatter after things went awry during Barnesvisit for fillings.

    Barnes said he went to Hatter to have

    cavities filled in two molars. However, whenBarnes awoke two days later in a seedy motelnear Ft. Stockton, he found that he had becomea woman and was pregnant. He accusedHatter, who was the last person Barnes saw, ofmedical malfeasance.

    I wondered why he was giving me amorphine drip just for fillings, Barnes said onthe stand, but I figured, hes the expert after all.

    The most damning evidence against Hatter

    was a post on his Facebook page: Big daytoday. Turned a male patient into a woman andgot her pregnant.

    Naturally, the court ruled in Barnes favor,awarding him $150 million.

    The case then took a strange turn as theCity of New Braunfels appealed the decision,irrelevantly claiming that it cant be sued.

    In a pitiful exchange, justices on the ThirdCourt of Appeals explained, in the simplest termspossible, that the City cannot appeal a case that

    it is not enjoined in nor is part of in any fashion.Confused City attorneys then asked

    for clarification.You. Cannot. Appeal. This. Case. the

    justices responded.We dont understand you, City

    attorneys replied. You are saying words, butthey make no sense.

    The justices then had the attorneys removedfrom the building.

    The City has since appealed the decisionto the Texas Supreme Court, arguing that courtsare not allowed to rule against the City.

    Krueger QuestionsCrownover CashAfter winning the primary runoff for the PrecinctFour Commissioners Court seat, Jen Crownoverhad her political donations questioned bydefeated foe Dan Krueger.

    Krueger asked Crownover to come cleanabout money she received from out of state.

    Mrs Crownover noted that the moneycame from her parents.

    That cant be true, Krueger said. Theirnames arent Crownover.

    Krueger then went on to say that he hasstrong evidence that the money actually camefrom a front that represents you-know-who,refusing to elaborate.

    Krueger also refused to answer questions

    about large sums of campaign funds hereceived from Red Shoes Inc.

    Tony Bell makes things up for the TX Citizen.

    FAKE NEWWith Tony Bell

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  • 8/12/2019 TX Citizen 6.5.14

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  • 8/12/2019 TX Citizen 6.5.14

    10/1610 AD SALES 830.358.2493

    Friday,

    June 27 at 7pm!SHOCK

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    all ages welcome! Admission Just $5 - Cheap!Mildly Gaffed Carnival Games! Valuable Prizes! Live Auction! 50/50 Raffle!

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    Featuring a Special Appearance by

    Luke the Chicken Boy

    & Victoria, the Not-Tattooed Lady!"You'll have to see her to believe it!"

    The TX Citizen and the phoenix saloon Brazenly Present

    Starring Le StrangeTexas Only All-Female Sideshow

    ADVICE FROM

    OPA ESEL

  • 8/12/2019 TX Citizen 6.5.14

    11/16TXCITIZEN.COM 11

    Enjoy Responsibly 2014 Shock Top Brew ing Co., Sh ock TopLemon Shandy Flavored Belgian-Style Wheat Beer, St. Louis, MO

    Dear Opa Esel:

    I was recently driving to San

    Antonio, when I noticed a sign for

    Screaming Woman Creek. Te name

    really gave me the creeps. Are there

    any other creepy creeks in and around

    Comal County?

    Just Curious

    Dear Just:

    Oh, my, yes. Screaming Woman Creek

    was named after the ghost of a woman who

    screams at passersby. But the creek isnt the

    only spookily named waterway by a long

    measure. Here are some more:

    Syphilis SpringsBack in the olden days, people believed you

    could cure venereal disease by swimming in

    these springs. They were wrong.

    Typhoid River

    This river once contained typhoid. It still does.

    Dont go there.

    Rabid Coon Creek

    The raccoons here are rabid and they bite. So

    do the people that live along its banks.

    Sociopathic Hobo LakeThere arent a lot of hobos here these days, but

    there are some businessmen and politicians.

    You can find them around campfires, cooking

    Sociopath Stew out of old tin cans.

    Dead Headless Clown CreekNot as terrifying as it sounds. This is just where

    clowns go to die.

    Liebe, Karl

    Dear Opa Esel:Whats with all the deer around

    here? Should I be frightened?Deer Wary

    Dear Deer:

    Yes, you should. They are plotting

    something. It is a well-known fact that deer

    are devout Communists. The proof of this is

    their unwavering support for Russias push into

    Ukrainian territory.

    The genus of this hard move to the leftcame as businesses started to build into areas

    that the deer once inhabited. Pushed from the

    homelands, the deer became anti-Capitalists.

    The situation was further aggravated after

    the deer were given copies of Karl Marxs

    Communist Manifesto by malcontent squirrels.

    Marxs work served as kindling to the dangerous

    fire of angry, establishment-hating deer.

    Now, they are planning to destroy us.

    When you pass them on the road at night, get

    a good look. Those big, angry, hateful eyes tell

    you all you need to know.

    Good luck.

    Liebe, Karl

    Karl Esel is a lifetime resident of our fair city, and is wellknown for his sage advice on a wide range of topics. Ifyou find yourself perplexed with no one to turn to, sendyour question to Opa Esel at: [email protected] sure to write Question for Opa Esel in the subjectline of your email.

    OPA ESEL with Karl Esel

    Lets go to Texas, he said. Start a new life among the wide open ranges, he said. Now hesgone. Ran off to look for a city made of gold. She told him it was just a myth, but he didnt listenand now hes dead. Idiot. Now, she and her daughter are stuck in this God-forsaken place, aloneand frightened. The oxen with the freakishly small heads arent responding to commands and are

    pulling them through a patch of demonic carnivorous plants, which have points so sharp they cutthe very air. She knew they were doomed.

    MOST WANTEDCOMAL COUNTY S

    ASK A MEXICAN!!

  • 8/12/2019 TX Citizen 6.5.14

    12/1612 AD SALES 830.358.2493

    MOST WANTED

    $200REWARD

    MEDELLIN, JESSERODRIGUEZMale 507 200 lbsDOB: 01/01/1976CHARGE: Possessionof a controlled

    substance pg 1 under1 gram and theft ofproperty under $1500with 2 or moreprevious convictions

    CHANDLER,

    CASEY LEE

    Male 511 150 lbs

    DOB: 10/22/1991

    CHARGE: Assault

    family/ house memberimpede breath/

    circulation

    DENSFORD,

    TAMMIE JEAN

    Female 506 110 lbs

    DOB: 11/03/1963

    CHARGE: Motion to

    revoke probation forburglary of habitation

    DORPINGHAUS,JACOB MATHEWMale 602 167 lbsDOB: 10/10/1988CHARGE: Failure toappear motion to

    revoke probationaggravated sexualassault of a child

    AGUIRRE,REYNALDOLAGUNASMale 508 200 lbsDOB: 10/02/1971

    CHARGE: Possessionof a controlledsusbtance

    GANN,

    AMBER

    Female 506 185 lbs

    DOB: 04/16/1985

    CHARGE: Intoxication

    assault and aggravated

    assault with a deadly

    weapon

    HUGHES,

    CRAIG GLEN

    Male 504 135 lbs

    DOB: 01/13/1982

    CHARGE: Possession

    of a controlled

    substance

    OLVERA,

    CASSIEFemale 503 110 lbs

    DOB: 11/25/1967CHARGE: Motion to

    adjudicate forpossession of a

    controlled substance

    SAUCEDA,ADOLFO

    Male 509 165 lbsDOB: 10/07/1980

    CHARGE: Failure toappear/ motion to

    revoke/ driving whileintoxicated with 2 or

    more prior conv

    KINCAID,

    RYAN ANDREW

    Male 511 170 lbs

    DOB: 05/26/1989

    CHARGE: Bail

    jumping and fail toappear felony

    The names listed have been rele ased in accordance with t he Texas Public Information Act. This is a true andaccurate account as of Tuesday, June 3, 2014 at 10:53 am and may not be current by the time it is read. Donot try to apprehend anyone. These are listings of criminal warrants with the Comal County Sheriffs Officeand are not indicative of guilt or innocence. Officers are to verify the status of each warrant prior to makingan arrest. Any person is innocent of wrongdoing unless proven guilty in a court of law.

    FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE ARREST OF COMAL

    COUNTYS MOST WANTED.Callers will remain anonymous.

    830.620.3400 - 24-Hour

    830.620.3411 - Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm

    CARRILLO,

    CRUZ ANGELMale 510 145 lbs

    DOB: 05/03/1986

    CHARGE: Two counts

    of burglary of vehicleswith previous two or

    more convictions

    ARRESTED

    By Gustavo Arellano

    Dear Mexican: I am a Mexican who

    owns a successful wholesale liquidation

    business, which happens to be an

    industry dominated by Jews and Asians

    and some gringos. So why does almost

    everyone, including mexicanos, that

    visit my warehouse think my business

    or any successful business (for that

    matter) is always owned by a Jew or a

    gabacho? Cant a pinche Mexican own

    a successful business? Just cause Im

    54, named Armando and dont look

    like the typical business type and Idont have a MBA?

    My customers always assume Im

    the sales rep or the forklift operator

    and ask to speak to the owner or El

    Arabe and almost always include a

    statement like, El dueo es judio,

    verdad? Well, no, the damn owner

    is not judio: soy yo, si este mexicanito

    es el dueno de esta b odega. Like if only

    Jews can own a business? Like the

    stupid joke says, wo Jews walked into

    a barand bought the place. Yeah, I

    dont think its funny, either.

    Que la chingada, attention everyone:

    my pockets may not be as deep as those

    camellos but we are getting there.

    chame la mano to my Mexican-ownedbusiness. Im thinking about putting up

    a sign like during the Rodney King riots

    MEXICAN OWNED or maybe not,

    mis gabacho clients se van asustar. P.S.

    A Mexican designed our website, not

    Patrick or Chang, I support the cause.

    Mexican BusinessmanBelieve It

    Dear Wab: Okay, we get it: youre not a

    Jew, and you dont like Arabs (calling Arabs

    camels? Everyone knows Mexicans call

    Arabs Talibans if they want to be insulting).

    But the reason why people are so surprised

    you own a business is because theres nearly

    not enough of ustedes.

    Mexican-American Entrepeneurship,

    a 2008 study by Robert W. Fairlie and

    Christopher Woodruff, showed that only

    5.1 percent of Mexican-American men were

    business owners, compared to 12.6 percent

    of gabachos. The researchers blamed

    surprise, surpise!U.S. immigration policy

    that kept Mexicans undocumented and

    away from the roads to owning a legitimate

    business. On the other hand, recent research

    by University of Southern California professor

    Jody Agius Vallejo and others show Mexican-

    Americans getting into the middle class by

    starting their own businesses and in some

    ways succeeding more than other immigrants

    based on how low they started.

    And the Mexican would argue that

    Mexicans are born small-business owners.

    Selling oranges at freeway exits? Small

    businessperson. Tamales from car trunks?

    Small businessperson. Jornaleros, cutting

    grass for gabachos, screwing wives gabachos

    dont screw properly? Small businessperson,

    Small businessperson, small businessperson.

    Dear Mexican: Why do my

    90-pound junior high students wear

    three and four white -shirts (all sized

    6x or larger) layered one on top another

    in 100-degree heatthen complain

    about the heat?

    Maestro De Foto

    Dear Photography Teacher Gabacho:

    Por pendejosDUH. Then again, logic and

    fashion sense among American high schoolers

    of any ethnicity go together like the PRI and

    clean government.

    ASK A MEXICAN! VIDEOS ARE BACK!:

    Gentle cabrones: after a years-long

    hiatus, Ive relaunched the video version of this

    columna. Follow my weekly rants on Twitter by

    clicking the hashtag #askamexican and ask

    away. Enjoy!

    Ask the Mexican at [email protected], be his fan on Facebook,follow him on Twitter @gustavoarellano

    or ask him a video question at youtube.com/askamexicano!

    ASK A MEXICAN!!

    Hot in the Kitchen!

  • 8/12/2019 TX Citizen 6.5.14

    13/16TXCITIZEN.COM 13

    Out here on the ocean, I not only cook what our guests catch, I catch fish as well! We had a

    great day fishing, testing out our boats tackle and our on-board fishing guides skills before the

    first guests arrived for this weeks voyage on the M/V Liseron. I was lucky enough to catch two

    40 lb. halibut! Our guides and deck hands filleted the fish for me and I was off to the galley to

    whip up a spicy, yet sweet treat, for you and them!

    Alaskan halibut is a very mild and flakey fish. You dont need to season it too much to bring

    out its amazing flavor. I like to treat halibut like the steak of the sea, and the recipe I used is

    very simple for that very reason. The vinegar and oil is mostly used so that the halibut doesnt

    stick to the hot grill grates. The flavor will come from the fish itself, and the mixture of the lime

    and sweet chili sauce will add an Asian and Caribbean touch. Wild caught Alaskan halibut

    will run about $25.00 to $32.00 per pound in your local grocery stores fish department. It is

    worth the money and will make for a great celebration dinner or romantic evening. Pair with

    nice warm sak or a chilled white zinfandel wine.

    Spicy Grilled Alaskan Chili-Lime Halibut cup rice vinegar

    cup grape seed oil

    Juice from 1 fresh lime

    1 cup sweet Thai chili sauce

    cup black sesame seeds

    4 Alaskan halibut lets, about 8 oz. each

    Combine first 5 ingredients and pour into

    a large zip lock freezer bag. Reserve a little

    of the marinade for brushing the fish during

    grilling. Add halibut filets and ensure the

    filets are evenly coated. Refrigerate at least

    1 hour. Grill over white-hot charcoals until

    filets begin to flake easily with a fork; about

    5-6 minutes each side. Brush each halibut filet

    with the reserved marinade as needed. Serve

    with lime wedges, Asian vegetables, and my

    Cilantro-Lime Rice recipe below:

    Add 1 cup of white rice to 1.5 cups boiling water, add

    Juice from the 1 fresh lime

    tbls salt

    tsp coconut oil or unsalted butter After rice is cooked, add 4 tbls fresh chopped cilantro; mix with fork

    Lets see what I catch next!

    Until next time, Eat, Drink & Be Sherri!

    Sherri

    Copyright 2014 by Eat, Drink & Be Sherri. All rights reserved.Sherri Gallagher is a New Braunfels chef who grew up in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where she began cooking at the age of

    8. This summer Chef Sherri will be sailing on the M/V Liseron which sails weekly from Sitka to Juneau, Alaska. On board,Chef Sherri will be preparing breakfast, lunch, dinner, happy hour hors doeuvres, and cocktails for her 20 passengers andcrew, so get ready for some amazing new recipes! Chef Sherri can be contacted at [email protected].

    Hot in the Kitchen!with Sherri Gallagher

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  • 8/12/2019 TX Citizen 6.5.14

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    VA Hijinks,

    Shenanigans, Tomfoolery

    There are quite a few things worth talking

    about this week, but before some new scandal

    completely removes the VA from the news, I

    thought I would use this column to cover it.

    Its sad that we have a system in place that

    treats our honorable servicemen so poorly

    that many die before they can get the medical

    treatment they need, but its not surprising.Government does everything badly, and when

    you combine that incompetence with perverse

    incentives a tragedy was bound to occur.

    The media is unlikely to cover this scandal

    effectively primarily because there are several

    aspects to it that need to be examined, and

    none of them fit the comfortable narrative the

    media likes to work with.

    First is something that many

    conservative writers have already talked

    about at some length. What we see at the

    VA is just a preview for what we will see with

    Obamacare. Many liberals during the initial

    healthcare reform debate held up the VA as

    a shining example of a socialized medicine

    success story. This is true in the same way

    that many programs in the Soviet Union or

    Communist China were success stories: the

    government simply lies about the results until

    they get caught.

    Now that they have been caught, we can

    see that a one-payer system is not one that serves

    the patient best. As always, it is the customer

    that receives services. In a single payer

    system, the patient isnt the customer. Worse,

    when the payer is the government, a mismatch

    of power interferes with the normal economic

    relationship between customer and provider.

    The government has more power available to

    them than just economies of scale. Providers

    can be coerced into providing services that

    dont make economic sense. When they are,

    providers will either seek ways to cut corners

    or get out of the market altogether. The patient

    is left either with substandard care or no care

    at all because of shortages.

    This is what will happen with

    Obamacare as well. Healthcare providers

    forced to participate will look for ways to

    offset costs. This will lead to a decrease in the

    quality of the care provided. The alternative

    option for providers is to get out of the system

    entirely. We are already seeing this. Doctors

    who are unwilling to work for a pittance or

    compromise on their quality of care, are

    leaving the profession.

    The government has a last option that we

    will no doubt see employed for both the VA

    and Obamacare: spend more money. When

    all else fails, the government inevitably throwsmoney at a problem, and this crisis will be no

    different. When faced with the inability to get

    services and angry taxpayers, the government

    will offer to pay more. This will drive up costs

    and lead to more waste.

    The larger scandal in the VA story is the

    fact that government workers were profiting

    from what was happening. The problemof long waiting times for veterans was

    something the government was aware of

    since the Bush administration. In an attempt

    to solve this problem, bonuses were offered

    for shortening waiting times. Having no

    way to avoid the basic laws of economics,

    workers and supervisors colluded to create a

    system where not all of the veterans waiting

    for care were placed on line. A separate,

    secret line was created, preventing the

    records from showing any overflow. As a

    result, they were given bonuses.

    While this behavior is reprehensible,

    criminal even, its probably worth understanding

    that the bureaucracy was reacting at least in

    part out of self-preservation. One can expect

    that after the carrot, the stick would be quick

    in coming out. There was no way to solve the

    problem they were presented with, and I have

    no doubt that many were convinced that they

    would soon be held responsible for something

    that was outside of their control.

    As I suggested before, the next step in this

    process will be to throw money at the problem.

    Expect to see calls for more funding for the VA

    soon. It wont matter that spending has already

    been ramped up. It will be assumed that only

    more funds will get results.

    In some respect this is correct. If enough

    money is spent, we probably will be able

    to hire enough doctors and other provides

    to decrease wait times, but it is also sure

    that most of the additional money will be

    wasted. Much of it will be eaten up in the

    bureaucracy. Fraud and waste will also takea good-sized chunk. When all is said and

    done, the costs will be far and beyond those

    in the private sector.

    Beware a call for vouchers from the

    Republican side. This is almost certainly the

    direction they will see as a solution. They

    will forget that this is no different than the

    low-interest loans that we offer for collegestudents. Government pumping money

    into any market will only increase costs.

    Vouchers offer a better solution than the

    standard think-happy-thoughts-and-keep-

    growing approach, but it is still a form of

    market interference.

    The way the administration has handled

    this is shameful but also no surprise.

    President Obama seems to ignore problems

    until they become so large that they are

    impossible to ignore. The VA seems to have

    worked this way; after all, the problem

    was specifically pointed out by the Bush

    administration when Obama came into

    office. Nothing was done until the media

    uncovered that the system was so broken

    that veterans were dying.

    Once Obama was forced to address

    the issue, he was far too slow to get

    Shinsekis resignation, and he still has not

    taken any real action. Part of this comes

    from Obamas belief that he already has the

    best people in place for the jobs they do. If

    that is true, he would argue that there is little

    to be gained by removing the person most

    capable of solving the problem. We saw the

    same attitude with Sebelius. Of course, it

    might not be true that these people are the

    best ones for the job, and regardless of how

    smart the technocrat in question, Obamas

    attitude simply ensures that there wont be

    any accountability.

    What Obama fails to understand is that

    leadership requires accountability. Shinseki

    was the head of the VA. The responsibility

    for this failure is his for that reason alone.

    Shinseki may not be the source of the

    problem; it may even be true, as he says,

    that he relied on people who deceived him.

    None of that matters. There may be a good

    many heads that need to roll at the VA, but

    Shinsekis must be the first.

    That has occurred now, but it is a little

    late in coming. The truth is that there is no

    way to solve the problem at the VA, but

    that doesnt mean that people shouldnt be

    held accountable. Shinseki has lost his job

    already, now its time to get rid of everyone

    who misled him, gave him bad advice, or

    sought to cover this up. This can be followedup with the firings and criminal prosecutions

    of anyone who sought to profit from filing

    false reports.

    There are others who should be punished

    for this too, but their firings arent possible until

    November 2014 and 2016.

    You can read more from Kelly Colby at yourfirstshrug.blogspot.com.

  • 8/12/2019 TX Citizen 6.5.14

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