Trauma Informed Care for Childrens Ministry

Trauma Informed Care

Tell short history of Foster Care and adoption1

To understand how trauma and risk factors effect the brainTo learn that the empowering, connecting, and correcting model of trauma-informed care is useful for all children in a ministry/classroom settingTo learn practical interventions along with empowering, connecting, and correcting strategiesObjectives

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Why Is This Training Needed?

Usually parents can choose from a wide variety of parenting styles to help a child feel love and trust, and mature in their reasoning and judgments.The child may respond appropriately to any one or more of these parenting practices giving a parent a wide window of opportunity to build connection while disciplining. This helps the child grow to be an adult with healthy relationships.But for parents with kids who have experienced trauma, the window narrows and many traditional parenting techniques do not work.In fact, some of those time-tested, traditional techniques can make parenting the traumatized children very difficult and even more traumatizing.

Watch this short video about how the brain develops3

Executive Part of the Brain

Controls reason, logic, language, interpretation of cues, the ability to regulate, etc.

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Survival Part of the Brain

The Survival Mode controls our fight, flight, or freeze reflex.

For most of us the executive part of our brain helps us keep the lid on the lower part of our brain.Kids who have gone through trauma commonly experience a lid flipping response to situations that does not make much sense to us.

Dog encounter example

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Six Risk FactorsPrenatal StressDifficult Labor or BirthEarly Medical Trauma (NICU, surgeries, painful experiences)AbuseNeglectTraumatic events

As you can see any child can be at risk for trauma-related behaviors.Discussion: What lifestyles do we lead that can cause children to have challenging behaviors even if they do not have one or more of these risk factors? (fast-paced causes a lack of nurture/connection, high divorce rate causing loss of predictability, trust, connection etcWhile this material addresses specifically the challenges and needs of traumatized children, it emphasizes healthy connection and trust. Therefore the interventions are applicable to all including adults 6

How Do We Fix It?

One of the common threads in all children who have experienced trauma is that when their brains needed another brain/person to help them understand the outside event or experience, there was no one OR they were in a situation in which a very caring person could not help them (NICU, medical trauma, etc). Our brains do not develop on their own. We are not born with all that we need, but, in fact, our brains REQUIRE connection and relationship with others in order to mature. 7

One Important Priority!

Connecting with the child 80% of handling difficult behavior is connecting with the child BEFORE the correction is needed. If you dont have a relationship, a trust, with the child then you wont get very far with them. Have you connected with the child BEFORE an issue arises?Are you connecting with them in a playful way and using the appropriate DEGREE of correction to keep them on track?Do they know you care and love them? Did they interpret your actions and words as love? Doesnt this make sense as Believers? Doesnt the Lord love us BEFORE he corrects us? His correction comes out of love. We are wired to relate to others this way.

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Three Common ChallengesTimeframeStimulating EnvironmentDisrespect or Disobedience

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Timeframe

Many of our childcare programs wrap-up close to lunch or dinner. Therefore our children are often hungry or tired, and their behavior goes downhill. Children with trauma are extremely sensitive to physiological stressors and needs. Are the children you are working with hungry or tired? Is there something physiological you can do to help them get through that last 20 minutes before pick-up.

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Try This!Protein Snack If the church cant provide one, then ask the parent to provide it. Send the child to a floating adult to step out into the hallway if needed.Hydration Water lowers glutamate levels (glutamate contributes to aggression and excitability) Water your kids!Arrange activities so they assist in your children being physiologically prepared

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Stimulating Environment

We can put on some pretty exciting programs for our kids. Music, dancing, lights on stage. Fun games and funny skits. And then with little warning, we ask them to listen, be still and respond sensitively and knowledgeably to Bible Stories. That environment challenges any child, let alone a child who relies on their lower brain to function (fight, flight or freeze)Is the environment affecting the child? Are transitions between activities difficult?

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Try This!Give a child with noise sensitivity earphones/earplugs. Let a child choose the area of the room they want to stand in.If the child has difficulty regulating their bodies from being excited to being calm, then give them something heavy to carry like a stack of books or a weighted backpack to the next activity or room.Provide predictability or a heads up about transitions. Give a 5 minute warning or allow the child who has difficulty announce the next activity. Help them calm their bodies in a playful way.

3. A bit of control for a child goes a long way. Remember they are not IN control. You are sharing what you own 4. (Remember, brains do not develop alone. They need other mature brains to help them!) This activity may help the children process the transition from high energy to quiet calm. They may need to do it a couple times before they are ready to sit and listen.Say Shake, Wiggle squirm like flopping fish! (let the kids do this) Now, move like you are in jello. Slowly, slowly Now, act like a rock. A rock that has eyes. Look around the room like you are a rock with eyes. Use this activity often and over time, youll see a big difference in the amount of time a child takes to bring their bodies back to quiet calm.

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Disrespect or Disobedience

It happens. Even at church. Sometimes, especially at church. A child looks at you point blank and says no to your request and adds an eye roll for emphasis. Or they hear a rule and look left and right and then do exactly what they were told not to do. Doesnt that God given desire for justice burn in us sometimes when a child responds this way?? (But how often does God respond to us with justice v. grace?)

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Try This!Can you say that again with respect?If a child demands something, say Are you asking or telling? Can you say that again with respect?If a child becomes angry, throws a tantrum, or refuses to participate, you may need to change the subject for a few moments to help them calm down. But dont let them get away with the disrespect or disobedience.

2. They may need some coaching to use good words, but that is ok! They will catch on if you consistently use this phrase.3. Get on their level and talk to them. Encourage them to verbalize with good words the situation OR if that is too much, change the subject all together, and talk about something playful (summer vacation fun, sports, a silly story). Verbal communication comes from the executive function brain (the lid). You can possibly get the executive function part of the brain (reason, communication, etc) back online again through the use of language. And youll be building a connection with the child too which is ALWAYS helpful. Once you are in a good place of communication, bring the task or activity back up. Perhaps use slightly different wording. For instance, if you originally said you all are going to make cards for your moms today! Try a slightly different angle with the child, saying Can I work with you to make a card? Or do you want to sit with John or Bob while you do the activity. I call this a side-swipe (instead of a head-on collision you WILL do the activity.)

All of these interventions work just as well with kids who have not dealt with trauma. The reason is that at the core of all of these approaches is connecting while correcting. You dont need different interventions for various groups of kids, so even if you never know the past of a child, these work well. For child brain development, research tells us that brains mature through the connection with other mature brains. All children need consistent, mature adults to help them interpret information and then model an appropriate response. Traumatized children need a greater degree of this. It is with compassion and grace that we provide this. It is of the same fabric that God parents us.

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Questions?

What challenges or behaviors are you currently facing and how can you connect and correct?Based on what you learned about the way our brain functions, why would reward systems not work well with children from hard places? Why would consequences at times not work?How could the interventions be misunderstood as being soft on children? (Too soft or connection would cause our children not to mature/grow. Too much correction would cause children not to trust. Must be a balance.)

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Resourceshttp://empoweredtoconnect.org/understanding-sensory-processing http://empoweredtoconnect.org/parenting-strategies-that-connect/http://empoweredtoconnect.org/creating-a-healthy-adoption-culture-in-your-church http://empoweredtoconnect.org/whats-your-play-personality/http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3877861 http://www.KennethACamp.com

It is with compassion and grace that we provide this. It is of the same fabric that God parents us.

----- Meeting Notes (1/7/15 15:12) -----1.What challenges or behaviors are you currently facing and how can you connect and correct?2.Based on what you learned about the way our brain functions, why would reward systems not work well with children from hard places? Why would consequences at times not work?3.How could the interventions be misunderstood as being soft on children? (Too soft or connection would cause our children not to mature/grow. Too much correction would cause children not to trust. Must be a balance.)

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