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Transcript of Transactional Analysis How We Spend Our Time. Transactional Analysis A model for explaining why and...
Transactional Analysis
How We Spend Our Time
Transactional Analysis
A model for explaining why and how:People think like they doPeople act like they doPeople interact/communicate with others
Based on published ‘psychological’ work such as:Games People Play (Dr. Eric Berne)I’m OK - - You’re OK (Dr. Tom Harris)Born to Win (Dr. Dorothy Jongeward)
Our Brain (according to Berne)
Determines what we think and how we act Acts like a tape recorder while recording
Events Associated feelings
Has 3 distinct parts or ego states Parent Adult Child
Transactional Analysis Eric Berne was born in 1910 in Montreal, Canada. His father was a doctor & his mother was an editor.
His father died at age 38, when Eric was 9
Earned an MD in 1935 from McGill Univ
Became a US citizen and served in Utah during WWII, practicing group therapy
Transactional Analysis Was denied membership in the Psychoanalytic Institute
in 1956
This brought about his rejection of psychoanalysis and was a turning point in his life
Wrote the book Games People Play
Died of a heart attack in 1970 at the age of 60
Transactional Analysis Four methods of understanding & predicting human
behavior
Structural analysis – within the person
Transactional analysis – 2 or more people
Game analysis – understanding transactions that lead to bad feelings
Script analysis – understand a person’s life plan
Transactional Analysis
Structural analysis – Natural child – spontaneous, impulsive, feeling
oriented, self-centered & pleasure loving
Adaptive child – compliant, conforms to the wishes & demands of parental figures
Transactional Analysis
Transactional Analysis or TA is a way of understanding
… and changing human behavior
… why communication fails and how it can be corrected.
… one to one relationships
Transactional Analysis
TA Ego States or Personality Aspects
Parent Adult Child
Transactional Analysis
Parent… learned to act and feel much as those that raised us.Parent
Prejudiced/Critical Parent…
follows rules, accepts slogans, holds opinions without thinking first of facts.
Nurturing Parent…
Supportive and protective toward others, offers help and guidance.
Transactional Analysis
Clues to Someone in Their Parent
… a frown or stern look.… tone of voice.… pointing of the index finger.… arms folded as to say “what are you doing?”… uses phrases like; “you should,” “you ought to,” “that is
right!”… words such as; sympathizing, punishing. moralizing,
judging, giving orders, criticizing.
Recognizing the Parent State
A person in a NP stated is likely Use words such as well-done, good, gentle, caring,
don't worry Use a loving, caring, comforting or concerned tone of
voice Use open, encouraging gestures, smiling, leaning
forward, nodding of head Have a caring, understanding attitude
Recognizing the Parent State
A person in CP state may: Use words , such as bad, should, ought, must,
always, ridiculous, unacceptable Use a patronizing, critical or disapproving tone of
voice Use aggressive gestures Come across as judgmental, authoritarian Be intimidating or controlling
Transactional Analysis
Child… what we were when we were young.Child
Free Child…
Open to life, spontaneous, filled with the sense of wonder and delight, self centered, aggressive, rebellious, does not consider the consequences of feeling or actions.
Adapted Child…
Polite, sociable, recognizes the rights of others,adapts behavior to suit them, can resent the rights/demands of others, complies grudgingly, feels unsure about themselves, procrastinates .
Transactional Analysis
Clues to Someone in Their Child
… smiling, laughing, having fun.… tone of voice.… crying, having tantrums, getting into trouble.… childlike facial expressions.… uses words/phrases like; “Wow!,” “Gosh!,” “I wish,” “I
feel.”
Recognizing the Child State
A person in a free child state Use words as wow, great, ouch, want Talk loudly, energetically, free of constraint Use spontaneous gestures and expressions Be curious, fun-loving, changeable
Recognizing the Child State
A person in adapted child may
Use words such as can’t, try, hope, please, perhaps, wish
Sound sulky whinny, placating
Come across as innocent, helpless, sad, scared
Act in a defiant, ashamed or compliant way
Transactional Analysis
Adult… looks at the facts and reasons out the answer - the computer ins us.Adult
… figures things out logically.
… takes responsibility for thoughts, feeling and actions.
… solves problems and makes decisions.
Transactional Analysis
Clues to Someone in Their Adult
… straight forward facial expression.… active listener, eyes blink every 3 to 5 seconds showing
attention.… speaks of probabilities.… uses phrases like; “In my opinion,” “Based on what I
have observed,” “So far the facts seem to indicate.”
Recognizing the Adult State
A person in as Adult Sated is likely to Speak in an even voice Have an erect posture and use open gestures Be alert and thoughtful about a problem they are
facing Clarify the situation by careful questioning Hypothesize and process information Use words like correct, how, what, why, practical,
quality
People generally exhibit all three Ego states. All three Ego states are necessary to healthy personality
People can change the frequency of which They use one ego state by concentrating Or developing another
Ego Portraits People have favorite, preferred ego state, depicted by
larger circle in a diagram
Parent Adult Child
P
A
C
P
A
C
P
A
C
Human Interaction Analysis A transaction = any interaction or communication between 2
people
People send and receive messages out of and into their different ego states
How people say something (what others hear?) just as important as what is said
Types of communication, interactions1) Complementary2) Crossed3) Ulterior
Complementary ‘Transactions’ Interactions, responses, actions regarded as
appropriate and expected from another person. Parallel communication arrows, communication
continues.
Example 1: #1 What time do you have?
#2 I’ve got 11:15.
P
A
C
P
A
C
Complementary ‘Transactions’ cont’d
Example 2:
P
A
C
P
A
C
#1 You’re late again!
#2 I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.
Crossed ‘Transactions’ Interactions, responses, actions NOT regarded as appropriate or
expected from another person. Crossed communication arrows, communication breakdown.
Example 1 #1 What is the time ?
#2 There’s a clock on the wall, why don’t you figure it out yourself?
P
A
C
P
A
C
Crossed ‘Transactions’ cont’d
Example 2 #1 You’re late again!
#2 Yeah, I know, I had a flat tire.
P
A
C
P
A
C
Ulterior ‘Transactions’ Interactions, responses, actions which are different from
those explicitly stated
Example #1 How about coming up to my room and
listening to some music?
P
A
C
P
A
C
Life Positions
are attitudes which people adoptand act out concerning their self-worth and the value of others
Life Positions
I’m OK, you’re OK
I’m not OK, you’re OK
I’m OK, you’re not OK
I’m not OK, you’re not OK
I’m not OK, you’re OK
Submit to, concede You have a low opinion of your own
value and poor self esteem; lack self confidence and expect things to go wrong A negative outlook tends to lead to a self fulfilling prophesy and you often lose out in situations
I’m OK, you’re not OK
Compete, aggression You will tend to be
competitive. You may not cope well with failure, look down at others, blame other people and see them as cause of your failure
I’m not OK, you’re not OK
Avoid Life may seem to be futile and that
nothing can be done to improve things. A life of rejecting and feeling rejected
I’m OK, you’re OK
Cooperate, share
You believe in yourself and
others, are trusting and tend to
get on with life
Transactional Analysis- Script analysis
Script analysis – everyone develops a life script by age 5 & these scripts determine how one interacts with others based upon the interpretation of external events
A negative life script occurs when the person receives lots of injunctions by the parents that used the word DON’T
Transactional Analysis
Common negative life scripts: Never – one never gets to do what one wants
Until – one must wait until a certain time or until something is done to be able to do something they want to do
Always – one must continue to do what one has always done
Transactional Analysis
After – a difficulty is expected after a certain event
Open-ended – one does not know what to do after a given time
Mini-scripts: Hurry up! Try harder! Be perfect! Be strong! Please someone! These drivers allow for temporary escape from life scripts
Driver Styles or Commands
These are script messages which we have received from our parents when we were very young and which help to form our life script and OK positions
Drivers induce us to act in a particular way
The 5 Drivers are
Be Prefect – if a job’s worth doing, it’s worth doing well
Please (others) –be nice to everyone, guess what they want you to do and then do it
Try hard – try at something rather than focus energy on its completion
Be strong – I can cope, leave it to me Hurry up
Every time we act out a dominant driver we are responding in the adapted child ego state to an internal voice which is in parent mode.
Changing Life Script
The main aim of TA is to get an individual in a position of ‘autonomy’
Becoming aware of your life stance Adopting a more positive view of yourself and
other Recognizing that you can alter the way you
behave Recognizing that you and you alone control your
life and destiny
Strokes
Stroking is an act of recognition for another.
Everyone has to have strokes (affection, recognition and praise).
Strokes may be positive, negative and mixed Conditional and unconditional
Giving and receiving strokes Don’t be insincere
Accept strokes positively from other people
Make a conscious effort to give strokes to other people
Try to recognize other people’s reaction to strokes and the frequency/kind they appear to appreciate
Ask for strokes when you feel you need them
Give yourself strokes when you feel you deserve/need them
Games
Games are a set of transactions that have surface logic but hidden meaning and attempt to draw in an unsuspecting participant.
An outcome of games is always a win-lose propositions
Transactional Analysis- Game analysis
Game analysis - ulteriorly motivated transactions that appear complimentary on the surface but end in bad feelings:
1st Degree games – minor upset, played socially end up with minor discomfort
2nd Degree games – more intimate end up w/bad feelings
3rd Degree games - usually involve physical injury
Transactional Analysis
Very few games have a positive or neutral outcome
In these games, people play one of three positions:
Victim Persecutor Rescuerhttp://www.ericberne.com/Games_People_Play.htm
(T.A.) Games
Crooked or covert exchanges of strokes
Regularly repeated interactions with ulterior motives
Often the players of these games are not conscious they are doing this
But sometimes they are!
(T.A.) Games
An example of a game
Wooden leg:I’d be able to get a job, if only I didn’t
have this wooden leg (or other disability, or long term unemployment or this stupid federal government, or whatever)
Group Exercise
You have a friend who uses the wooden leg excuse. In their case it is depression.
How are you going to address this issue with them?
What steps are you going to take to stop playing the game?
(T.A.) Games
An example of games
“I’m only trying to help you!”
“What would you do without me?”
(T.A.) Games
A good example of a game that we are all familiar with is:
‘Why don’t you/Yes but…’
‘Why don’t you/Yes but…’
Friend says: ‘I want to work as a waiter but no one will give me a go.’
You say: ‘Why don’t we ring a few restaurants to see whether they are hiring at the moment.’
Friend says: ‘Yes, but my old collegue rang all the restaurants in town a few months ago and nobody was interested.’
Group Discussion
You have a friend who plays the ‘yes but’ game all the time.
How are you going to address this issue with them? What steps are you going to take to stop playing the
game?
‘Why don’t you/Yes but…’
How to stop the game Stop making suggestions!
Review how your sessions with friend progress. Need to change format?
Remember, within reason, some approaches are worth giving a second – or third - go
TA: How to use it
Be aware of your own ego state as well as the other’s
Try and stay in the Adult state
Be aware of any Games being played
If a Game is being played, find a fresh approach that seeks to engage the Adult in the client
T.A. Final Thoughts
Be aware of your own language/posture
Keep discussions result focussed
Beware going into Parent mode
Some attempts at rapport building may become parent-child interactions if you are being unconsciously patronising
Stick to the agreed Job Search Plan as much as you can
Thank you