Train Up A Child

• "Train up" – proper conduct is not automatic; it is the duty of the parents to teach it (Eph. 6:1-4)

• "A child" – you must start early

• "In the way he should go" – there is a proper way to live according to God’s word

• "And when he is old" – we take with us what we were taught in childhood

Train Up A Child

• Instructive discipline – teaching with words, both positive and negative reinforcement (Prov. 1:8; 3:11-12)

• Corrective discipline – spanking (Prov. 13:24; 19:18; 22:15; 23:13-14; 29:15,17,19)

• Self-discipline – the goal of teaching and spanking early on is to develop self-control later in life (Prov. 20:11; 22:6)

Discipline Is Teaching & Training

Discipline Is Teaching & Training

Prov. 13:24 - - -Prov. 19:18 - - -Prov. 22:15 - - -

Prov. 23:13-14 - -Prov. 29:15,17 - -

Loving & diligentTimely & controlledAppropriate &correctivePainful & savingEducational & rewarding

• Note four important words:

– "rod" (use something other than your hand)

– "beat" (pain without abuse; 19:18b in KJV)

– "chasten" (instruct, correction, wisdom)

– "reproof" (calmly explain why they are getting a spanking)

Discipline Is Teaching & Training

• Give both positive and negative statements

• Make the punishment equal to the misbehavior and age appropriate

• Express disappointment without demeaning words: stupid, moron, idiot, etc.

• Set rules and boundaries and keep them

• Be consistent; don't make empty threats

Discipline Is Teaching & Training

• Say “No” and meant it; don’t lie to your child

• Punishment needs to be immediate

• Distinguish between willful disobedience and accidents

Discipline Is Teaching & Training

• Do not spank when you are out of control

• Do not spank in a way that abuses (lacerations, bruising, broken bones, scarring, etc.)

• Do not spank without cause; no constant hitting

• Do not spank without explaining why; use it as an opportunity to teach; reaffirm love

Discipline Is Teaching & Training

• Respect for authority and obedience is established early on with instructive and corrective discipline: home (Eph. 6:1), civil (Rom. 13:1), and church (Heb. 13:17)

• Disobedience to parents is a sin (Rom. 1:30; 2 Tim. 3:2)!

Discipline Is Teaching & Training

• Don’t ignore disobedience and the need for correction!

• Many parents are permissive like David; he wouldn’t question his child (1 K. 1:6)

• Many parents are permissive like Eli; he said “No”, but he didn’t enforce it (1 Sam. 2:22-26; 3:13; see Deut. 21:18)

No Discipline = Permissiveness

• Early to bed on Saturday night; naps on Sunday afternoon if necessary

• Face them forward so as not to distract themselves and others; adults should not "play" with them from across the room

• Bring quiet, Bible related activities (cloth books); wean them off of these as soon as possible so they can hold a song book or their own Bible; later they can take notes

In the Worship Service

• Use the break time to get all your “needs” done; constant “in and out” during the service is disruptive; emergencies are one thing, bad habits are another

• Use the nursery for accidents or discipline only, not for playtime or sleep time

• When you take them out for discipline, make it count: “take them out, wear them out, and bring them back in”

In the Worship Service

• The building is not a place to play

• Parents, take turns with the discipline

• “Practice” at home to have a time to sit still and be quiet; we can’t expect them to behave at the church building if they are not made to behave at home; quiet and still behavior is learned at home

• Be consistent at every service (Heb. 10:25)

In the Worship Service

• Love them by speaking the truth to them (Eph. 4:15) and love them by correcting and disciplining them (Prov. 13:24; Rev. 3:19)

• Save them (Gen. 18:19)

Love Them, Save Them