Top this for a Speeding Ticket... Two British traffic patrol officers from North Berwick, east of Edinburgh, were involved in an unusual incident, while checking for speeding motorists on the A1 Great North Road.

One of the officers (who are not named) used a hand-held radar device to check the speed of a vehicle approaching over the crest of a hill, and was surprised when the speed was recorded at over 300mph. The machine then stopped working and the officers were not able to reset it.

The radar had in fact locked on to a NATO Tornado fighter jet over the North Sea, which was engaged in a low-flying exercise over the Borders district.Back at police headquarters the chief constable fired off a stiff complaint to the RAF Liaison office.

Back came the reply in true laconic RAF style. “Thank you for your message, which allows us to complete the file on this incident. You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Tornado had automatically locked on to your ‘hostile radar equipment’ and sent a jamming signal back to it. Furthermore, the Sidewinder air-to-ground missiles aboard the fully-armed aircraft had also locked on to the target. Fortunately the Dutch pilot flying the Tornado responded to the missile status alert intelligently and was able to override the automatic protection system before the missile was launched.”

This issue’s TOPICS :

TOPIC 1Top this for a Speeding Ticket near Edinburgh...

TOPIC 2A Christmas narration by Hugh Bonneville...

TOPIC 3Ken Smith, the man with a dream in making music...

TOPIC 4A Christmas Poem and a new Christmas Song...

Issue No : 021 December 2020

No Nativity this year... because the three Wise Men face a travel ban.

The Innkeeper has shut under Tier 3 regulations and had a slump in bookings.

Santa won’t be working as he would break the Rule of Six, with Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Donner and Blitzen.

As for Rudolph, with that red nose, he should be isolating and taking a test!

‘It is Well with My Soul’ - A Christmas Narration...Guest Artist Hugh Bonneville narrates the true story behind the song ‘It is Well with My Soul.’ The narration was written by David Warner, with music by Philip P. Bliss, and arrangement and additional music by Mack Wilberg. I think you all will find it very moving and beautifully performed. Take a few minutes and watch by following the link on YouTube at https://youtu.be/ReApJymYSiw

One O Level and a Dream...A few months ago, parents and grandparents as well as young people were rejoicing in the GCSE level results. However, not every young person was covered in glory. I was reminded that a few doors down and on the other side of the road where I live, a 16 year old boy left school with just one O level (not music) and a dream of becoming a professional musician. It seemed he had little hope of his dream coming to fruition and most other occupations required more than one O level.

He became an apprentice in an engineering factory as his father had done before him. He was not at all keen on this job and kept his dream alive by going to evening classes until he had enough qualifications to get into University. He continued to practise his instrument obsessively.

He was accepted at Cardiff University and when staff heard his playing they said he should transfer to the School of Music and Drama from which he graduated - the dream was still alive.

The journey was not over, he then qualified as a teacher and taught in a local school - the dream still alive. Some time later he found an advertisement for principal flute for the Bournemouth Symphony orchestra. Ken applied and

was successful. All his hours and hours of practise and keeping his dream alive payed off. After some years with the Bournemouth Symphony orchestra he was appointed as principal flute of the London Philamonia Orchestra.

Those who listen to classic FM will often hear recordings of Ken Smith playing his flute as a soloist. I have not seen him for some years and he may have retired by now.

Parents, grandparents of those who don’t stack up GCSEs, it is not the end of the world. If your young people have a dream and the will for it to materialise, there is life after GCSE results. Sheila Barnfather

A Happy Christmas to you all...

A Christmas Poem 2020...Christmas is a time for singing Songs to welcome Christ our king. Choristers and music makers Join to make their offering.

Some will sing alone this Christmas. World of sound a different place. Instruments are solo voices In a quiet or silent space.

Christmas still a time for praising, With the Magi play our part Journeying to worship with them, Carolling within our heart.

Frightened shepherds hurry to Him And with joy they greet His birth. With them see the king of heaven And the Lord of all the earth.

Though the world is locked in silence Re-live Christ’s nativity. All the praise and music in us, Offer in humility.

Sheila Barnfather

The Brewood Singers perform a new Christmas Song...The Brewood Singers, formed over 45 years ago by David Brookes, are a small local SATB choir performing arrangements of songs from film, theatre, pop and light traditional choir music. They have produced a virtual choir video in which they perform a new Christmas song written and composed by their Musical Director David Brookes. It is called ‘The Song of the Angels’. Have a listen on YouTube at https://youtu.be/MpnrFHxmLWI

Gerard van Honthoust, 1622

This issue’s TOPICS :

TOPIC 1Val Fairclough, one of our sopranos, is ordained as a Deacon...

TOPIC 2Live Music - Kate Procter tells how the Snape Maltings in Suffolk stages music performances...

Issue No : 022 December 2020

Valerie Fairclough ordained as a Deacon...Valerie Fairclough was ordained as a Deacon by the 99th Bishop of Lichfield, the Rt Revd Dr Michael Ipgrave, at Lichfield Cathedral on 26th September 2020.

Originally from Liverpool, Valerie now calls Wolverhampton home and is a member of WDCS singing in the sopranos. She lives with her husband Stephen, two dogs and a cat. Valerie has two grown up daughters and three granddaughters. She worked as a teacher, mainly in Further Education, for many years; this was her vocation for her adult working life. Valerie first felt a calling to be a priest as a teenager, but women were not allowed to be priests back then. So she waited.

During her years of teaching, she learnt what it is to walk alongside those who don’t have an easy life; she learnt to have a listening ear and empathy. Valerie learnt to respect and love those who are marginalised and oppressed. This was time not wasted. A few years before retirement, Valerie felt God’s call again and became a Reader but it was not enough. God called her on. Valerie thought she was too old, but remembered Sarah who laughed when God told her she would be the mother of God’s people. Valerie finally accepted God’s will for her. Valerie has learnt that God loves us and can call us into service at any age. Her advice for those exploring God’s call - do not be afraid if you are called later in your life; be open to all possibilities, with prayer.

Valerie will serve her title in the Central Wolverhampton team with Revd Ray Gaston.

To see the full service on video, follow the facebook link:https://www.facebook.com/JTV-Production-336366000157377/videos/858637204702428/ jumping the first 13 minutes of test screen...

December Madness W. S. Beattie

Advent LongingThese are the greedy days.It used to beThat Advent was a longing fast,A time to feel our needin faith and tingling hopeAnd keen-eyed looking forward.

Now we cannot waitBut day by day and week by weekWe celebrate obsessivelyClutching at Christmas.

When at last it comes,The day itself,Our glass is empty.

We have held the feastAlready, and the news is staleBefore it ever reaches us.We cheat ourselves.

Yet - somehow - still we hopeIn these spoiled daysThat there may be a child.

This poem always comes to mind when Janet Lungley is Christmas shopping... this year will be different, perhaps ?

Live Music...I write to tell you that even though news and times seem still to be depressing and seemingly no end to this dreadful virus, there is a little light at the end of the tunnel appearing in certain parts, with the re-emergence of live classical music that we have experienced first-hand and what a joy in these times it was.

We still have family connections and a home in Suffolk and have been spending more time during the last 3 months there, so the music venue in question is Snape Maltings, (formerly known as Aldeburgh Music), the venue that was brought to fruition many years ago by Benjamin Britten and Peter Pears, with it being quite close to their Aldeburgh home.

Snape Maltings have introduced weekend, socially distanced, limited time, classical concerts. Each performance lasts up to one hour, there is no interval, no paper tickets or programmes, just the information when booking online as to what is being performed by the artists. Generally, the afternoon concert is ‘free’ with the audience invited to donate, if they wish, what they feel is appropriate and the evening concerts are all £15 per person with the option to add an additional sum of your choosing as a donation. I presume the afternoon sessions also act as a type of rehearsal for the artists, although this is not stated.

We have attended two evening ones so far and thoroughly enjoyed the experience and felt very safe in doing so too. Seating is superbly arranged and very well and intelligently spaced. There is no sense that they are doing the ‘bare minimum’ in terms of socially distancing procedures and masks are compulsory for the audience, visors are not acceptable as an alternative either. At the end of the performance we leave the venue row by row, or seat by seat, as only one pair, or group of up to four per alternate row are available anyway.

Our first concert was with a favourite baritone of ours, Roderick Williams who shared the platform with Mezzo Soprano Kitty Whateley, (daughter of actor Kevin Whateley) and pianist Gary Matthewman. Roderick Williams performed a selection of songs from Schubert’s Winterreise Cycle which were interspersed by songs that

Roderick Williams Steven Osbourne Simon Keenlyside Julia Bullock

A Happy Christmas to you all...

Link to Snape Maltings... https://snapemaltings.co.uk/season/weekend-concerts-at-snape/

Kitty Whateley had chosen, which came from composers such as Korngold, Mahler, Clara Schumann, Robert Schumann and Ivor Gurney. Roderick Williams in his introduction said how happy they were to be back and able to perform somewhere where they all felt safe to do so too. A fitting comment to the foresight and tenacity of Roger Wright and the team at Snape.

Our second concert, a week later, was the pianist Steven Osborne. Not someone we had heard live previously, but who came across as a thoughtful and sensitive artist, whose performance of little known Rachmaninov pieces, we very much enjoyed.

As you can imagine, tickets are soon sold out and next weekend, 31st October, we have tickets for another favourite baritone, Simon Keenlyside, together with Malcom Martineau performing a programme of Mahler, Shubert and Strauss. We saw Simon Keenlyside last year with ‘his jazz friends’ in a concert to mark the end of season at Grange Park Opera, a lovely relaxed evening of quality music making.

Preceding that concert on the Friday evening, we have tickets for an American Soprano, Julia Bullock. She makes her debut with the London Philharmonia and Eska-Pekka Salonen in a live streaming two days before with the programme she brings to Snape with the same musicians and conductor, which is the performance of Britten’s Les Illuminations, but with the Strauss Metamorphosen as the additional piece for the Snape venue.

Music making is also ongoing at Snape in a semi outdoor setting inside a large Tipi they erected on the Hepworth Lawn in the summer. Here they provide at weekends, bookable table seating for a menu of stone baked pizzas and salads with the music being provided by a range of more ‘locally’ known artists’, mainly from the folk and jazz genres. We enjoyed attending one of these in the summer months.

So, with thanks to Snape Maltings and the artists who are performing…… long may it be able to continue whilst we are in these difficult times. Kate Procter (Sop2)

This issue’s TOPICS :

TOPIC 1The Twelve Days of Christmas...

TOPIC 2Name the Kings and Queens of England...

Issue No : 023 January 2021

The Twelve Days of Christmas...The first day after Christmas my true love and I had a fightAnd so I chopped the pear tree down and burned it just for spiteThen with a single cartridge, I shot that blasted partridgeMy true love, my true love, my true love gave to me

The second day after Christmas, I pulled on the old rubber glovesAnd very gently wrung the necks of both the turtle dovesMy true love, my true love, my true love gave to me

The third day after Christmas, my mother caught the croup;I had to use the three French hens to make some chicken soup

The four calling birds were a big mistake,for their language was obscene

The five gold rings were completely fake and they turned my fingers green

The sixth day after Christmas, the six laying geese wouldn’t layI gave the whole darn gaggle to the R.S.P.C.A.

On the seventh day what a mess I foundAll seven of the swimming swans had drowned,My true love, my true love, my true love gave to me

The eighth day after Christmas, before they could suspect,

I bundled up the eight maids a milking, nine pipers piping,

Ten ladies dancing, ‘leven lords a leaping,

Twelve drummers drumming (“actually I kept one of the drummers”)and sent them back collect,

I wrote my true love, “We are through, love”,and I said in so many words,“Furthermore your Christmas gifts were for the birds!”

(Frederick Silver - Loosely based on The Twelve Days of Christmas) Janet Lungley

Picked up a hitch-hiker. Seemed like a nice guy.

After a few miles, he asked me if I wasn’t afraid that he might be a serial killer ?

I told him that the odds of two serial killers being in the same car were extremely unlikely.

A Pictorial Quiz...Name the Kings and Queens of England and the building in the background (Answers are given at the bottom of the page.)

Answers to Pictorial Quiz - Kings and Queens of England1. George V (1910-36) - 2. Victoria (1837-1901) - 3. Anne (1702-14) - 4. Charles II (1660-85) - 5. Elizabeth I (1558-1603)

6. HenryVIII (1509-47) - 7. Edward IV (1461-70) (1471-83) - 8. HenryIII (1216-72) - 9. Richard I (1189-99)10. William I (1066-87) - Background Building is Windsor Castle

This issue’s TOPICS :

TOPIC 1The history of the great British Sunday Roast...

TOPIC 2Name the ten composers from the Baroque Period 1600 - 1750...

Issue No : 024 January 2021

The history of the Sunday Roast..Have you ever wondered about the history behind the Great British Sunday Roast? Where did they originate from? And how did we, as a nation grow to love this delicious hearty dinner so much? Cast your minds back to 15th Century Britain, right back to when it all began...

It’s starts with the ultimate Sunday Roast- Roast Beef. British people’s love of beef began during the reign of King Henry the VII in 1485. The royal guards would eat roast beef every Sunday after church, which enabled them to get a reputation and become widely known as ‘beefeaters’. This tradition swiftly spread across the UK and on their way to church, the British public would drop off their beef at the local bakers, so that it could be roasted in time for when their Sunday service had finished.

Although Roast Dinners began with Beef, nowadays there are plenty of options to choose from. Whether it’s Beef, Chicken, Pork, Lamb or Vegetarian, you’ll be sure to enjoy a delicious Roast Dinner!

A full roast dinner sometimes comes with a Yorkshire Pudding. However, back when the Roast dinner tradition originally began, a Yorkshire Pudding was not served alongside the meat as it is often seen today. Instead, it was a starter dish served with lots of gravy. The thinking behind eating a Yorkshire Pudding as an appetiser, was that everyone would be too full and eat less meat for the main course (which, of course, was very expensive).

Vegetables are also a must have with every Roast Dinner, particularly root vegetables such as potatoes, carrots and parsnips. Not only are they good for you but they really compliment the rest of the food items on your dinner plate to ensure a well-balanced, hearty and colourful Sunday lunch. Mike Coope

COVID News...Until further notice, the days of the week are called: This day, That day, Other day, Some day, Yesterday, Today and Next day.

The buttons on my jeans have started social distancing from each other.

The dumbest thing I’ve ever bought was a 2020 year planner.

1. Johann Sebastian Bach (1685 - 1750) 2. Antonio Vivaldi (1678 - 1741) 3. George Frideric Handel (1685 - 1759)

4. Henry Purcell (1659 - 1695) 5. Claudio Monteverdi (1567 - 1643) 6. Heinrich Schutz (1585 - 1672) 7. Domenico Scarlatti (1685 - 1757)

8. Jean-Philippe Rameau (1683 - 1764) 9. Arcangelo Corelli (1653 - 1713) 10. Georg Philipp Telemann (1681 - 1767)

Name the ten Composers from the Baroque Period 1600 - 1750

1 2 3

4 5 6 7

8 9 10

This issue’s TOPICS :

TOPIC 1How the coffee bean was spread around the world...

TOPIC 2Music improves your memory...

TOPIC 3In Memoriam - Janet Heaton...

TOPIC 4The Art of Wood Carving...

Issue No : 025 January 2021

All from a single coffee bean...In 1714, the Mayor of Amsterdam presented a gift of a young coffee plant to King Louis XIV of France. The King ordered it to be planted in the Royal Botanical Garden in Paris. In 1723, a young naval officer, Gabriel de Clieu obtained a seedling from the King’s plant. Despite a challenging voyage - complete with horrendous weather, a saboteur who tried to destroy the seedling, and a pirate attack - he managed to transport it safely to Martinique.

Once planted, the seedling not only thrived, but it’s credited with the spread of over 18 million coffee trees on the island of Martinique in the next 50 years. Even more incredible is that this seedling was the parent of all coffee trees throughout the Caribbean, South and Central America.

The famed Brazilian coffee owes its existence to Francisco de Mello Palheta, who was sent by the emperor to French Guiana to get coffee seedlings. The French were not willing to share, but the French Governor’s wife, captivated by his good looks, gave him a large bouquet of flowers before he left - buried inside were enough coffee seeds to begin what is today a billion-dollar industry.

Missionaries and travellers, traders and colonists continued to carry coffee seeds to new lands, and coffee trees were planted worldwide. Plantations were established in magnificent tropical forests and on rugged mountain highlands. Some crops flourished, while others were short-lived. New nations were established on coffee economies. Fortunes were made and lost. By the end of the 18th century, coffee had become one of the world’s most profitable export crops. After crude oil, coffee is the most sought commodity in the world. Mike Coope

Music improves your memory...How did you learn the alphabet? Probably by learning the song. At some point, you probably learned every county in the country, right? It was probably thanks to a song.

One reason for this is that the part of the brain that processes music is the same part of the brain that creates and stores memories. So when you hear a song you know, it's often attached to a memory.

That's because of the dopamine release we get when we hear a song we like. So your brain makes a positive connection between a song and a memory. Then your brain can more easily recall memories or things you've learned.

More facts on what music can do for you to follow... Mike Coope

Can you guess where this is with the river with a number?

In Memoriam Janet HeatonAs you all know, very sadly we lost Janet on 15th October. Some of you may have been able to see her funeral service on the live web-cam from Bushbury Crematorium on Tuesday 17th November. The celebrant specifically mentioned in her address the family’s gratitude for the support of her fellow volunteers at Wightwick Manor and all her friends in Wombourne Choral Society, where she had been a valued member and staunch supporter, along with her late husband Paul, for well over 45 years. With her family’s blessing we reproduce here extracts from this address.

Janet was born on 14th March 1933 in Letchworth, where she lived with her mother Doris and father Robert Wray, a cabinet maker destined to become a Director of his firm, being joined a little later by her brother John. Following her formative education at St Christophers School, she trained as an Occupational Therapist, gaining her Diploma from her Association in 1953, aged just 20.

Love soon followed when she met Paul, who was then working in Ipswich as an Optician, and courtship and planning happily lead to their wedding in Letchworth on 30th March 1957. By this time Paul was working in Birmingham, which is where they made their first home, but he was soon attracted by Gordon Flint, Opticians in Wolverhampton, where a new fulfilling career beckoned, so the young couple moved to Green Acres, Tettenhall, where they were to remain for over 60 years.

Fun and adventure started here and as their family grew, first with John, later to be followed with the arrival of Philippa and Rob, weekend sailing at Chelmarsh became a regular and much-

The art of wood carving...Wood carving is one of the oldest arts of humankind. Wooden spears from the Middle Paleolithic, such as the Clacton Spear, reveal how humans have engaged in utilitarian woodwork for millennia. Indeed, the beginnings of the craft go so far back that, at least where timber is present, the use of wood exists as a universal in human culture as both a means to create or enhance technology and as a medium for artistry. The North American Indian carves his wooden fish-hook or his pipe stem just as the Polynesian works patterns on his paddle.

Wood carving is a form of woodworking by means of a cutting tool (knife) in one hand or a chisel by two hands or with one hand on a chisel and one hand on a mallet, resulting in a wooden figure or figurine, or in the sculptural ornamentation of a wooden object. The phrase may also refer to the finished product, from individual sculptures to hand-worked mouldings composing part of a tracery.

The making of sculpture in wood has been extremely widely practised, but survives much less well than the other main materials such as stone and bronze, as it is vulnerable to decay, insect damage, and fire. It therefore forms an important hidden element in the art history of many cultures. Outdoor

wood sculptures do not last long in most parts of the world, so it is still unknown how the totem pole tradition developed. Many of the most important sculptures of China and Japan, in particular, are in wood, and so are the great majority of African sculpture and that of Oceania and other regions. Wood is light and can take very fine detail so it is highly suitable for masks and other sculpture intended to be worn or carried. It is also much easier to work on than stone.

Some of the finest extant examples of early European wood carving are from the Middle Ages in Germany, Russia, Italy and France, where the typical themes of that era were Christian iconography. In England, many complete examples remain from the 16th and 17th century, where oak was the preferred medium. Mike Coope

loved family activity, supplemented by regular and varied dog walks with their series of King Charles spaniels. Though holidays abroad eventually featured in their plans, the early Camper Van holidays in Wales are always fondly remembered, but wherever they went was never far from water!

As the children left the nest, Janet’s other activities blossomed; becoming a very active Secretary of Wolverhampton Ramblers Club; walking with friends the Pilgrimage route to Santiago de Compostela, a magnificent total of 500 miles completed in two legs in successive years; tennis and badminton at Newbridge; and with Paul, treading the boards at Tettenhall Operatic, and of course their joint membership of Wombourne Choral Society.

Fascinated with wildlife, Janet was an active member of RSPB, regularly enjoying bird-watching trips out with Philippa, and she also harvested grapes at Halfpenny Green, relishing the receipt of bottles of amber liquid in lieu of payment! A proud moment too, with the award of a long-service medal from the RVS for her work as a volunteer at New Cross Hospital, running their teashop. Janet was also a volunteer at Wightwick Manor, helping to preserve a part of Wolverhampton’s historical legacy.

When she sadly lost Paul in 2016, with the family fully behind her, she continued with these activities which helped her to come to terms with life without him. Janet will be fondly remembered as a special someone who made a difference in whatever activity she undertook. But more than that, it was the warmth, love and kindness she radiated with whomsoever she met which marked her out as a truly remarkable lady, and as someone who will be sorely missed by her loving family and by us all. Henry - 7th December 2020