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THE BISHOPS CANDLESTICKS

Characters: the Bishop, the Convict, Persome, the Bishops sister, a i!o, Po"iceman#Scene: the Bishops $itchen# %inter o&tsi!e# 'arie stirrin(

some so&p on the )ire# Persome "a*in( the c"oth etc#Persome: it s ver* co"! toni(ht# The sno is )a""in( a"" over the (ro&n!# 'arie, isnt the so&p

+oi"in( *et'arie: not *et ma!am#Persome: e"" it sho&"! have +een rea!* a"rea!*# -o& havent ma!e a nice )ire, have *o&'arie: +&t ma!am

*o& *o&rse") ma!e the )ire on#Persome: !ont ta"$ to me "i$e that# -o& are r&!e#'arie: *es, ma!amPersome: then !ont "et me sco"! *o&a(ain#'arie: No, ma!amPersome: I on!er here m* +rother is# It is a)ter e"even o c"oc$# .Loo$in( at the c"oc$/ an! no si(n o) him#

'arie#'arie: -es, ma!am#Persome: !i! his "or!ship the Bishop "eave an* messa(e )or me'arie: no, ma!amPersome: !i! he te"" *o& here he

as (oin('arie: *es, ma!am#Persome: 0*es ma!am .imitatin(/# Then h* havent *o& to"! me, st&pi!1'arie2 ma!am !i!nt as$ me#Persome:

+&t that is no reason )or *o&r not te""in( me is it'arie: ma!am sai! on"* this mornin( I as not to chatter, so I tho&(ht 3 Persome2 Ah, m* 4o!,*o& tho&(ht1 Ah1 -o& are hope"ess#'arie: *es ma!am#Persome: !ont $eep sa*in( 5*es ma!am, "i$e parrot, +rain"ess#'arei: no,ma!am#Persome:e"", here !i! the Bishop sa* he as (oin('arie: to m* mothers ho&se ma!am#Persome: to *o&r mothers ho&se# In!ee!1

An* h*, ma* I as$'arie: the +ishop as$e! me ho m* mother as, an! I to"! him m* mother as )ee"in( ver* sic$#Persome:*o& to"! him she

as )ee"in( ver* sic$, !i! *o& An! so m* +rother is $ept o&t o) his +e!, an! (o o&t itho&t eatin( +eca&se *o& to"! him she as )ee"in( poor"*#

Ho nice *o& are, aren,t *o&'arie: ma!am, the so&p is +oi"in(1Persome: then po&r it o&t, )oo", an! stop chattin(# .'arie a+o&t to !o so/ No, no,

not "i$e that, here "et me !o it# 'eanhi"e, p&tthe sa"tce""ars on the ta+"e 3 the si"ver ones#'arie: the si"ver ones ma!am#Persome: *es, the si"verones# Are *o& !ea) as e"" as st&pi!'arie: the si"ver ones are so"!, ma!am#Persome: so"!1 .ith horror/ so"!1 Are *o& ma! %ho so"! them

%h* ere the* so"!'arie: His Lor!ship the Bishop to"! me this a)ternoon hi"e *o& ere o&t to ta$e them to the ship6$eeper ho o)ten

a!mire!them, an! se"" them )or as m&ch mone* as I co&"! (et#Persome: +&t *o& ha! no ri(ht to !o so itho&t as$in( me#'arie2 +&t, ma!am, his

"or!ship the +ishop to"! me# .ith ae/Persome: his Lor!ship the +ishop is a 3ahem1 B&t, hat can he have ante! ith the mone*'arie:

par!on, ma!am, +&t I thin$ it as )or 'rs# Dias#Persome: 'rs# Dias in!ee!1 'rs# Dias1 %hat, the o"! itch ho "ives at the top o) the hi"", an!ho sa*s she is a"a*s sic$ in +e! +eca&se she is too "a7* to !o an* or$ Ba! hat !i! 'rs# Dias ant ith the mone*, ma* I as$'arie:

ma!am, it as )or the rent# The po"iceman o&"! not ait an* "on( "on(er an! sai! he o&"! p&t her o&t to!a* i) themone* as not pai!, so she

sent "itt"e 8ennie to the Bishop to as$ )or he"p an! 3 Persome: oh, m* (o!, it is hope"ess, hope"ess# %e sha"" have nothin( "e)t# His propert* is so"!,

his mone* is a"" )inishe!# Hista+"es an! c&p+oar!s (one, ever*thin(# %ere it not )or m* "itt"e propert*, e sho&"! starve, an! no m* si"ver 3

si"ver .so+/containers (one# Oh, it is too m&ch, too m&ch# .she +ra$es !on cr*in(/'arie: ma!am, I am sorr*, i) I ha! $non#Persome: sorr*1

An! h*, ma* I as$ I) his Lor!ship the Bishop chooses to se"" his si"ver sa" t6containers he ma* !o so Is&ppose# 4o an! ash *o&r han!s, the*are rea""* !irt*#'arei: *es, ma!am .movin( to ash/.Enter the Bishop/Bishop: ah, ho nice an! arm it is in here1 It is orth (oin( o&t in the

co"! )or the sa$e o) the 9o* o) comin( in# .Persome has&ic$"* he"pe! him to ta$e o) his coat etc# 'arie has ma!e a !eep +o/ than$ *o&, !ear

;"oo$in( at her/ h* %hat is thematter -o& have +een cr*in(# Has 'arie +een (ivin( *o& tro&+"e, oh .sha$in( her )in(er at her/ ah1Persome:

No, it asnt 'arie 3 +&t 666Bishop: e"", e"", *o& sha"" te"" me a)terar!s# 'arie, m* chi"! r&n home no, *o&r mother is +etter# I have pra*e!ith her,an! the !octor has come an! (one#

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ant to (ive himsomethin( to eat#.the convict stan!s +ehin! him ith the $ni)e rea!*/Persome: hat, at this time o) the ni(ht %e have no time

even to s"eep# Some+o!* is a"a*s !ist&r+in( &s1Bishop: +&t, Persome, this is a poor h&n(r* man#Persome: oh, ver* e"", I i"" prepare some

)oo!# I am comin( .Persome sees the $ni)e in the convicts han! (ets )ri(htene!/#Brother, hat is he !oin( here ith that $ni)eBishop: the $ni)e,

oh, e"", *o& see, !ear, he !oesnt mean an* harm# He is a (oo! )rien! o) mine# ."a&(hs (ent"*/Persome: I am )ri(htene!# He is "oo$in( at me "i$e

a i"! +east# .asi!e to him/Convict: h&rr* &p# I sa*# Cha""o cha""o# 4ive me )oo! or I"" p&t m* $ni)e insi!e *o& +oth, an! start eatin(#Bishop:$eep the )oo! rea!*, Persome# .she $eep o&t the )oo!/# An! no, !ear (o an! s"eep#.Persome (oin(# The convict sprin( in )ront o) her/Convict:

stop# -o& i"" not "eave this room ti"" I !o# .he "oo$s at the +ishop/Bishop: Persome, i"" *o& remain $in!"* ith this (oo! man He nee!s *o&r

presence#Persome2 ver* e"" +rother#.she sits !on at the ta+"e starin( at the to/Bishop: here is some +rea! an! some ine an! some

c&rr*#Convict: p&t them on the ta+"e# An! stan! &p here I can see *o .+ishop ta$es o&t $ni)e an! )or$ an! (ives it to the convict/Convict: m*$ni)e is sharp# . he r&ns his )in(er a"on( the e!(e an! "oo$s at them meanin("*/ an! as )or )or$s .ta$in( it &p hethros it aa*/# %e !ont &se )or$in prison#Persome: prison

Convict2 .c&ttin( o)) a +i( s"ice o) +rea!# Eats then "oo$s at the !oor ith the start/ hat as that %h* !o *o& $eep *o&r in!os open an! the

!oor open An* one can a"$ in#Bishop: that is h* the* are "e)t open#Convict: are *o& not a)rai! o) ro++ersBishop: I )ee" sorr* )or the

poor#Convict: sorr* )or them# Ha1 ha1 Ha# .!rin$s )orm +ott"e/ thats +i( 9o$e# Sorr* )or them# Ha 1 ha1 Ha1 .!rin$s/ .s&!!en"*/ +*the a* ho are*o&Bishop: I am a +ishop#Convict: ha1 Ha1 Ha1 A +ishop# Ho"* smo$e1 A rea" +ishop1 %e"", that is (oo! "&c$#Bishop2 no, p"ease "eave &s# This

(oo! man an! I ant to ta"$#Persome: sho&"! I "eave *o& ith himBishop: p"ease## m* )rien! an! I are (oin( to ta"$ to(ether#Convict: .no ith

a (oo! moo! ith the +ott"e/ "eave &s, *es, "eave &s# I ant to ta"$ to the +ishop# The +ishop ha1 Ha1 Ha1."a&(hs as he !rin$s an! co&(hs/Bishop:

(oo! ni(ht, Persome s"eep e""#Convict: ."a&(hin( at himse")/ the +ishop ha1 Ha1 %e"" Im .s&!!en"* ver* "o&!"*/ D*o& $no hat I am

Bishop: I thin$ *o& have s&))ere! m&ch#Convict: s&))ere! .p&77"e!? s&))ere! '* (o!, *es# .!rin$s/ +&t that as a "on( time a(o# Ha1 ha1# Thatas hen I as a manno Im not a man, no Im a n&m+er2 n&m+er @;, an! Ive "ive! in he"" )or ten *ears#Bishop: te"" me a+o&t it 3 a+o&t

he""#Convict: h* .s&spicio&s"*/ !o *o& ant to te"" the po"ice 3 to p&t me +ac$ in 9ai"Bishop2 No# I i"" not te"" the po"ice#Convict: ."oo$in( at

him earnest"*/ I +e"ieve *o .scratchin( his hea!/ I !ont $no h*, +&t I +e"ieve *oBishop: ."a*in( his arm on the convicts arm/ te"" me a+o&t

the time 3 the time +e)ore *o& ent to 3 he""#Convict: it is so "on(, I have a"most )or(otten# I ha! a nice "itt"e ho&se, there as a nice (ar!en

.!reami"*/ it as a +ea&ti)&"home an!, an! 3 there as a oman, she as m* i)e 3 *es, I remem+er1 She as sic$, e ha! no )oo!, I ha! no

9o+, no or$,an! m* i)e, m* 8acinta, as sic$, !*in( .pa&se/ so I ro++e! some mone* to +&* some )oo! )or her# ."on( pa&se# The +ishop(ent"*pats his han!/ 3 the* ca&(ht me# I +e((e! o) them, I to"! them, I to"! them h* I ro++e!, +&t the* "a&(he! at me, an! Ias sentence! to ten *ears

in prison, .pa&se/ ten *ears in he""# The ni(ht I as sentence! the po"iceman to"! me6 to"! me8acinta ha! !ie! .so+s, ith )&r*/ Ah# Damn them,

!amn them# 4o! c&rse them a""# .he sin$s on the ta+"e so++in(/Bishop: no, te"" me a+o&t prison, a+o&t he""#Convict: te"" *o& a+o&t it "oo$ here, I

as a man once# No Im an anima"# The* chaine! me "i$e a !o(# The* ma!e me ananima"# I )e! on !irt# I as covere! ith insects# I s"ept onoo! an! I comp"aine!# The* +eat me a(ain# or ten *ears# Oh 4o!1The* too$ aa* m* so&", the* ma!e me into a !evi" +&t one !a*, I escape!# I

ran aa* )rom prison# That as si= ee$s a(o# Ias )ree, )ree to starve#Bishop: to starveConvict: *es to starve# The* ere "oo$in( )or me

ever*here, so I ha! to hi!e# I ha! to ro+ )oo!, to stea" )oo! ever*!a*# I s"ept&n!er trees, an*here# I as a)rai! to +e(# The* have me ma!e me a

thie), a ro++er1 4o! c&rse them a""1 C&rse them#Bishop: m* son, *o& have s&))ere! m&ch, +&t there is hope )or a""#Convict: hope1 Hope1 Ha1 Ha1

Ha ha ."a&(hs i"!"*/Bishop: *o& have a"$e! )ar, *o& are tire!# Lie !on an! s"eep in +e!# I i"" +rin( *o& +e! sheets an! a +"an$et#Convict:an! i) an* one comesBishop2 no one i"" come, +&t i) the* !o, I i"" sa* *o& are m* )rien!#Convict: *o&r )rien! .p&77"e!/Bishop: the* i"" not

tro&+"e the +ishops )rien!#Convict: the +ishops )rien! .scratchin( his hea!, p&77"e!/Bishop: I i"" +rin( the +e! sheets#Convict: ."oo$s a)ter him,

scratches his hea!/# The +ishops )rien! .he sees the can!"estic$s# He "oo$s ro&n! to see i) he isa"one, an! ta$es them !on, ei(hin(

them/#Si"ver m* 4o!, an! heav*, hat a pri7e/.he hears the +ishops comin(, an! in his haste !rops one can!"estic$ on the ta+"e# Enter the+ishop/ +ishop: .sees hat is (oin( on, +&t starts preparin( a +e!/# Ah 1 *o& are ta$in( a "oo$ at m* can!"estic$s# I am pro&! o) them#The* ere

(iven to me +* m* mother# The* remin! me o) m* mother# -o&r +e! is rea!*# %i"" *o& s"eep noConvict: *es, *es# I i"" s"eep no# .p&77"e!/

"oo$ here, h* are *o& so $in! to me .s&spicio&s"*/ hat !o *o& ant EhBishop: I ant *o& to have a (oo! s"eep m* )rien!#Convict: I $no

*o& ant to convert me, ma$e me (oo!# %e"" its no &se see I !ont ant an* !amne! re"i(ion, an! as )or thech&rch, +ah1 I hate the

ch&rch#Bishop: hat is a pit*, m* son, +eca&se the ch&rch !oes not hate *o&, the ch&rch "oves *oConvict2 *o& are (oin( to tr* to ma$e me (oo!,eh Oh ha ha ha1 No, no +ishop1 I !ont ant an* )aith, hope, an! charit* seeIm a !evi", a !evi", &n!erstan! .De)inite"*/Bishop: e"", Im

rea!* to he"p a !evi"2 4o! can ma$e *o& an an(e"#Convict: .an(ri"*/ I !ont ant an* !amne! re"i(ion, I te"" *oBishop: its (ettin( "ate# Dont

*o& ant to s"eepConvict2 .(r&m+"in(/ e"", a"" ri(ht, +&t I ont +e preache! at, I 3 I 3 ."ies on +e!/ are *o& s&re, no one i"" come#Bishop: I

!ont thin$ the* i""# No one i"" !ist&r+ *oConvict: h&mph1 I on!er i) its sa)e 6666here1 -o& (o to +e!# I"" cover m*se")# .the +ishop

hesitates/ (o on I te" " *oBishop: (oo! ni(ht m* son# .E=it Bishop/Convict: ."oo$s ro&n! an! sees the can!"estic$s a(ain/ h&mph1 I"" haveanother "oo$ at them# .He ta$es them &p an! p"a*s iththem/ the* m&st +e orth h&n!re!s, h&n!re!s1 I) I ha! this mone* I co&"! +e(in a(ain#

H&mph1 The o"! +ishop is ver* )on! o) them too, sai! his mother (ave them to him# His mother *es, he* !i!nt thin$ o) m* mother, hen the*

p&t me in prison# B&tthe +ishop a nice man# He as (oo! to me# Oh, +o*, Im (ettin( so)t# An! o&"!nt m* prison )rien!s "a&(h at me i) I (ot

so)tHa, ha n&m+er @; +ecomin( so)t I) I sta* here, he"" preach to me in the mornin( an! I"" +ecome so)t# Damn him an! his preachin(,

too# Im (oin(#.he ta$es the can!"estic$s an! (oes o&t the !oor a"arms/Persome: hos there hos there Im s&re, I hear! someone (o o&t# Thecan!"estic$s, the can!"estic$s# The* are (one#Brother, +rother come o&t# ire, m&r!er, thieves1Bishop: hat is it, !ear, hat is it %hat is the

matterPersome: he has (one# The man has ta$en aa* *o&r can!"estic$s an! (one#

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