Lame SauceThe White Legacy:Generation Four, Chapter Three

Oooh… that was a good break. I feel so refreshed. *yawn….* I think I’ll go see what my sims are doing. I mean, they couldn’t have gotten into too much trouble while I was napping, could they?

Hmm, I think I’ll take a look in on the subhood where all my spares are before visiting my main legacy family. That sounds like a good idea. Doo de doo… hmmm, let’s see what’s been going on…

…………….what.

My sims are conspiring against me.

Well, more specifically, my spares are conspiring against me. They seem to want more face time than I’ve already generously allotted them.

Greetings from

Peachtree Valley

Remember Aquamarine and her family? I vowed that I would not return to them, ever. But I did, and now events have spiraled out of control. But who wants to hear me complain? I sure don’t. Take it away, Aqumarine. Explain to them your vile treachery.

Aquamarine: “Uh… well, Keika needed an aspiration booster.”

Yes. Go on.

Aquamarine: “So she decided to play our house because she doesn’t have to record what’s going on here as dutifully as in the legacy house. Thing is, we needed aspiration boosts, too. We’re pleasure sims. We decided to go on a date.”

Aquamarine: “…Risky may have been involved.”

Meet Corona, Aquamarine and Joshua’s second and very much unplanned daughter. She’s the one in pigtails, in the back. She was not supposed to exist. Oh, well, I can live with that. It’s the fact that this isn’t where Aquamarine’s family’s saga ended that has me ticked off.

Let’s start with the more innocuous event. After Corona had been born, causing me to stay at their house way longer than I had intended, Lyra, a member of the main bloodline and in the running for heir, comes home on the school bus with Tigris. You see how cute these two are? I swear, it’s all a plot to get more face time. They’re going to make me adopt Tigris as Lyra’s bestest friend.

I was curious, so I looked it up. According to the internet, these two are second cousins, because they share the same set of great-grandparents. Look, you can kinda see the family resemblance.

And then the apartment lot glitched up.

GRAAAAAGH!!

It all began with the mailbox. I looked over at it and realized it was a regular mailbox. “What to do,” I said to myself. “If this remains, my dear sims won’t be able to pay rent!” And so I did a few stupid things, which resulted in a seriously glitched up apartment lot, and I needed to get my sims out of there, fast. The neighborhood move-out button wasn’t working with this apartment (it was badly glitched up), and so I decided to have Aquamarine invite over all her siblings who lived in the building. They moved in, so they were all in the same household, and then I used the “Find Own Place” option to get them all to move out to the sim bin. Unfortunately, this meant that one person had to stay behind, get boolpropped to death, and then be resurrected in the new place, because “Find Own Place” forces you to have at least one sim still in the household after everyone else has moved out.

That sim ended up being Sulfur, Aquamarine’s twin brother.

Sulfur: “Thanks a lot.”

I had to plead and wheedle and beg Grim to let me resurrect him, since the phone lines between the Luau and Riverblossom Hills have officially been cut, but we got him back.

So I decided to reward Sulfur. I had seen him once hanging out with Sandy Fairchild in the apartment common area and thought they were cute together. Sulfur and Sandy are now married, have their own kid (a son by the name of Orion), and are living in their own little house next door to Callie.

But since this is a conspiracy, this happened during Sulfur’s play time, too. I don’t think this picture really needs a caption, do you?

My dumb spares.

At least I know my main house won’t have betrayed me.

It’s going to feel so good to get back to these guys. It’s been a month since I was last here, after all. Now, they were in the dining room celebrating birthdays at the end of the last chapter, right? Let’s go say hi.

Hmm…?

Huh?

Where are they?

Jenny: “Keika, we have a bone to pick with you.”

SimMe: “Hold on, I’m trying to find my legacy.”

Jenny: “See, this is just what we’re talking about. You have an ego as big as all get out, Keika. You’ve got pictures of yourself all over our house, the gen five party was all about you, and you’re always depicting us as angry. We’re tired of playing second fiddle.”

Gabie: “Pony, you’re supposed to look angry.”

Pony: “At least I don’t look like I’m in pain.”

SimMe: “Sorry. My game, my rules. I think there’s some leftover takeout in the kitchen if you want some, since you’re here and all.”

Mystery: “Blast it. She knows our weakness.”

Aha! Found them! My legacy family slipped off to Three Lakes while I wasn’t looking!

Andi: “Oh hey, Author. Long time no see.”

Andi, what are you doing here? Your father is a vampire! Do you realize how dangerous it is for vampires to go on vacation? He could have died!

Hyde: “Chill Author, it’s all cool. We shipped Dad here in a box. He never had to step out into the sun.”

In… a box.

Lyra: “Wheeeee!!”

Jade: “That was a long ride.”

Sun: “Let’s, like, go out into the town. I’m super thirsty. I’m sorry babe, but I’ve gotta hunt.”

Jade: “It’s fine. Don’t kill anyone.”

Sun: “Not without you by my side, Star.”

Andi: “Get a room!”

Last time I checked, you two had a baby at home. Dane? Does that name ring a bell?

Jade: “We hired a nanny.”

Sun: “Chill out, Author dudette. It’s all cool. Let us enjoy our time on this righteous mountain.”

Excuse me for getting concerned when my sims decide to run off to a sunny vacation spot when my back was turned!

Hyde: “Ha-ha!”

Lyra: “Whaaa!!”

Lyra: “Oh, gross! It’s a fish!”

What did you think you were fishing for, a cute little fuzzy kitten?

Lyra: “It’s called ‘catfishing,’ isn’t it!?”

Jade: “This was such a good idea.”

It was not a good idea to slip off into the mountains while I wasn’t looking!

Sun: “It totally was, babe. It’s been nice and quiet. Totally groovy.”

And they’re ignoring me.

You know that nice, quiet vacation you two were talking about? So much for that cute picture I wanted of you cuddling in front of the fire.

I blame this one on Maxis. They’re the ones who put the rug in front of the fireplace, not me.

Jade: “HOT!!”

Sun: “What is, babe?”

Sun: “YOWCH!! THIS COUCH IS EATING ME!!”

At least Maxis had the foresight to put a fire alarm in the room. Don’t worry, this is not the story of how the kids became orphans.

Look, I even got that picture I wanted.

Sun: “Heh heh heh…”

Lyra: “Daddy, what are you doing?”

Sun: “Shh! You’ll give away our position!”

Andi: “Our position? Are we at war or something?”

(Jaws theme) Duh-dun…….

Duh-dun…….

Duh-dun-duh-dun-duh-dun-duh-dun….

Sun: “BLEH!!”

Bigfoot: “WHOA!! Sun, is that you? My goodness, man, it’s been decades! It is delightful to see you again!”

Hyde: “Dad, why are you scaring Bigfoot? Isn’t that his job?”

Sun: “Alaric Bigfoot, this is my wife, Star. Star, Bigfoot. Bigfoot, Star.”

Bigfoot: “Very nice to meet you, Star. It is good to meet you and your lovely children; after he left the loathe, I would never have suspected Sun here to survive the year, much less be able to pull off having a family. And yet here you are!”

Jade: “The loathe? What about it?”

Bigfoot: “Did he never tell you? Sun, or Jimmy as he was called then, was in fact—”

Sun: “Hey Bigfoot! Smustle time!!”

Bigfoot: “I do love to smustle!”

Ah, back home from your illicit vacation already?

Sun: “Out of my way, and stop griping at us already. Three of my needs are in straight-out red desperation.”

Leave room for Jade, will you? She desperately needs a shower.

Hyde: “I hate studying.”

Lyra: “Shuddup. I just want to finish.”

Hyde: “Welcome home, Mom! This lady says she’s our aunt!”

Jade: “Please go back to studying, Hyde.”

Hyde: “Aw, man!”

Jade: “Hello, Aunt Arie. What’s the occasion?”

Arie: “I’m collecting on a deal I made with your grandfather. Let me in.”

Arie: “Toro—my big brother, your grandfather—told me I could be here for every birthday. But I haven’t been invited in two generations. In fact, I think my youngest nephew’s birthday is tonight, right?”

Jade: “I’m sorry, Aunt Arie.”

It’s really more your fault for not letting your nieces and nephews know you still wanted their cake, Arie.

Arie: “Not listening.”

As you can see, no one had time to change clothes before Dane’s birthday, and Arie did indeed wheedle her way into an invitation. Nice job, Arie.

Arie: *tooot toot toot!*

So finally, a month after he was born, Dane becomes a toddler.

…you know, in any other context, that would be incredible. Here it’s just sort of pathetic.

Jade: “I think we’ll leave him with this hairstyle.”

It is very cute.

Arie: “Hello there, you little cutie! Tickle tickle tickle!”

Dane: “Mehehe!! Baqbop she ba bop!”

Arie: “Now let’s get you out of this wall, shall we?”

Dane: “Booq.”

Sun: “Ooga ooga oo! Ooga ooga oo!”

Andi: “So… you’re my mom’s aunt… and you’re also my aunt?”

Arie: “Actually, I’m Jade’s great-aunt. I’m your great-great-aunt.”

Andi: “Crazy.”

Arie: “You’re telling me.”

Snow: “Hey, Arie.”

Arie: “Hi, Mom.”

Go home already, Arie.

Snow: “Ha! Look who’s ‘crabby’ now!”

Sun: “Far out! Like, flying baby!”

Dane: “Wheeee!!”

Sun, you were supposed to be teaching him how to walk, not fly.

Sun: “Whoa, Author. Don’t be putting us into boxes now. If the baby wants to walk, he’ll walk. If he wants to fly, he’ll fly. No need to, like, suppress his creative energies.”

Oh, brother.

Hyde: “I’m missing ‘Larry Lemon’ for this.”

Lyra: “Okay, seriously, Hyde. Shut up. I’m trying to concentrate.”

You got this, Andi. You’ve missed the last five shots, but you’re just having an off day. Never mind all that. Just concentrate. It’s just you and the net.

Andi: “Author, will you shut up already!?”

I don’t understand it. My sims are so touchy lately.

No way.

Sun: “What?”

You finally found your dream job in politics.

Sun: “I’m totally gonna fix up this government and, like, end all war and turn the cities into giant flower gardens.”

Good luck getting to and from work without crispifying.

Hyde: “How come she gets to play on the pinball machine?”

Because she maxed the skill she was working on.

Lyra: “And because I’m awesome.”

And she’ll be going on to the next skill after her fun bar’s full.

Lyra: “Aw… lame sauce…”

Hyde: “Yes! Finally, I get a chance to play on the pinball machine!”

Patrick: “Hello, great-great-grandson! You should return to your studies, or else you will never build sufficient scholarships for your sojourn at university!”

Hyde: “ACK!! Okay, okay, I’ll study, I’ll study!!”

Sun: *GASP!!*

Yeah, I know. “The sun, I must flee! Bleh bleh!”

Sun: “Your efforts to stereotype me like this cut me deeply, Author. No, see, I was totally just complaining about this suit I have to wear.”

You want to be a politician, you get to wear the suit. Now go get in your coffin-box. Smoking isn’t good for your health.

Hyde: “So if I play basketball with you, you’ll play SSX3 with me?”

Andi: “That’s the deal, squirt. Though why you want to play fake, pixilated sports more than the real thing is beyond me.”

Do you really need that fifth slice of cake, Hyde?

Hyde: “How old is this stuff again?”

Your great-grandfather made it when he was younger than your mother is now.

Hyde: “Sweet.”

Lyra: “What, another slice? He’s totally going to ruin his figure!”

You know, I don’t think he really cares, Lyra.

Lyra: “Well, he should!”

Hyde: “I can hear you, you know!”

It’s birthday time! Jade got inspired and invited not only Aunt Arie, but also Aunt Callie and Aunt Gizmo. Although Gizmo seems to have slipped behind the camera.

Hyde: “I wish for a new video game!”

Good luck with that one, kid.

Also transitioning tonight is Dane. No more toddlers for us!

Since we’re here, get a look at Hyde’s transition outfit. He looks like a watermelon.

Hyde: *tooot*

That outfit looks familiar. Didn’t Hyde transition into that, too?

Also note Isis floating in the background there, out haunting for the first time. Let’s just leave her to it, shall we?

Lyra: {Heh heh heh. Dane looks like a dork.}

Sun: {Not that suit again…}

Arie: {Where’s the cake?}

Okay, we’ve got some birthday close-ups to do. Here’s Hyde. He rolled Popularity, and apparently wants to become Mayor. I don’t really see that for him, but whatever.

I ended up granting his wish and buying him a game console.

Hyde: “Awesome! You’re the best, Author!”

Aww, you’re welcome, sweetie. It’s nice to get a little appreciation from my sims once in a while.

Hyde: “Could you get this camera out of my face? You’re in the way of the TV.”

And here’s the Great Dane, all birthday makeover’d. He’s so super cute, isn’t he? He of course doesn’t have a real aspiration yet—

Dane: “Isn’t ‘Grow Up’ an aspiration?”

Of course it is, squirt, it’s just not an adult aspiration. Anyway, Dane’s personality is, no joke, 10/3/10/3/9. The White family trait of extreme personalities is strong in this one.

I’ve noticed these breadfruit trees seem to like to burn forever once they’re struck by lightning. No one recognizes it as being on fire. No one except for me, of course.

Lyra: “I love this room!!”

Finally, someone who does! Seems like all my sims do nothing but complain about this room.

Lyra: “It’s so pink!!”

Precisely.

Hyde: “Hey Andi, I heard the Smis Shop is having a sweet sale on sports games. Wanna come with?”

Andi: “Are you kidding? At this time of night? You’re crazy!”

Hyde: “HEY!! You stepped on me!!”

Andi: “Heh. Oops. Sorry.”

Jade: “…”

Sun: *muffle gruffle muffle*

Jade: “Can’t hear you, honey. Put your arm down.”

Sun: “You look totally serious, babe. Wanna talk?”

Jade: “I’ve been thinking.”

Sun: “A dangerous pastime.”

Jade: “Ha ha. It’s just, my birthday is in less than a week. I’m going to be an elder. You never will be. You’ll still be an adult when our grandkids our born. And still when I die.”

Sun: “You want me to make you a vampire? I don’t like it, but I could totally do it.”

Jade: “No… I don’t want to live like that. I’m just… scared.”

Jade: “…”

Sun: “…”

Jade: “…I love you, Jimmy.”

Sun: “Love you too, Jade.”

Sun: “Say, have you, like, seen Hyde tonight?”

Hyde: “Crap crap crap crap. This was such a bad idea. What do I do, what do I do…”

Voice: “Hey! Get back here!”

Hyde: “No no no no! Not a dead end! It can’t be a dead end!”

Voice: “Hey.”

Woman: “Gotcha.”

Woman: “Listen, kid. You’re one of those legacy brats, right?”

Hyde: “Y-yes…”

Woman: “Quit mumbling and stuttering. You sound like an idiot. Inquiring minds want to know if this generation’s heir’s been chosen yet.”

Hyde: “I… I…”

Woman: “Seriously, kid. You and I both want to get out of this smelly alley as soon as possible, so just spit it out. It’s a simple question. Yes or no. Is there an heir yet or isn’t there?”

Hyde: “U-um…”

Voice: “SERAPHINE!!”

Woman: “Great. Just perfect.”

Seraphine: “Listen closely, kid.”

Woman: “Run.”

Hyde: “W-what?”

Woman: “Run. Go. Get out of here! What don’t you understand!? You do not want to be here in a few minutes from now!”

Woman: “RUN!!”

Sun: “Hey dude, where’ve you been? We were just totally going out to look for you.”

Hyde: *huff puff* “I am NEVER going downtown by myself *huff* EVER AGAIN.”

Sun: “You gonna, like, tell me what happened, or are you just gonna totally keep me in suspense?”

Orion.

Orion: “Author.”

What are you doing here?

Orion: “Making friends with Dane. Mom and Dad said to make sure to spend every moment I could making friends with the legacy kids. Some sort of face time conspiracy between all the spares’ kids. Author, what does ‘face time’ mean?”

I knew it.

Hyde: “Oh, yeah. Take a look at this studly bod. I am so groovy.”

At this point, I think it’s about time I deleted all the mirrors in the house. Go do your homework, Hyde, you’re falling behind.

Hyde: “Meh.”

Don’t “meh” me, go study!

Samantha: “Let me tell you, Jade, you are so lucky to be a member of a legacy. Look at me. I’m a bin sim, and I’m stuck perpetually pregnant for all eternity. Hint, hint, Author.”

You are not one of mine, heathen. Back away from my legacy lot.

Jade: “Hello, Aunt Arie. Yes, it is Lyra’s birthday this evening. Come join us. No, thank you. We cannot eat all of this cake by ourselves.”

Lyra: “It’s my birthday~!”

Yes, yes, you’re very cute. Hurry up and transition. It’s not like we haven’t seen ten kazillion of these before.

Lyra: “You’re no fun.”

BWAHAHAHA!!

Lyra: “Oh, no no no no. Excuse me while I go vomit. Nobody look at me!!”

Arie: “Don’t you think that’s a little too much makeup, Lyra?”

Lyra: “There is never such a thing as too much makeup, Aunt Arie.”

So, here she is. Lyra rolled Family for her aspiration, but she’s also got Popularity as a secondary. Yes, I did indeed roll for both. She hasn’t quite picked her LTW yet.

Hey, was that the doorbell? Either of you two going to answer it?

Lyra: “Nope. Mom’ll get it.”

Person At Door: “Can I come in? I’m sorry, it’s just really important…”

Jade: “…who are you?”

Arie: “Hey Jade, thanks for the cake, but it’s getting late and I should… probably…”

Arie: “…Baltic!?”

Hmmm… yes, this seems like a great time to cut off the chapter! Stay tuned for a ginormous interlude, and happy simming! Same journal, same channel!