The U Turn: A Guide to Happiness

7/29/2019 The U Turn: A Guide to Happiness

1/11


2/11

The U-Turn

The U-Turn is a book which will have wide appeal. It is notjust those who have significant emotional or interpersonalproblems who will welcome its wisdom but the personon the street who has to deal with the day-to-day travails

of life. Conor Farren has produced a volume that isboth sensitive and practical, that does not minimise thedifficulties we face dealing with the rawness of life, but yetoffers a path through the forest of worry, anxiety and fearthat confronts us all from time to time. He explores thehidden underpinnings of our reactions to life stressors and

then provides us with help in tapping into the resourcesaround us that can guide us through these. As in his otherworks, Conor writes in a style that engages the reader ata human and personal level, and assists in the journey tocontentment and happiness.

Professor Patricia Casey, University College Dublin


3/11

The U-Turn

A Guide To Happiness

Conor Farren


4/11

viii

About the Author

Dr Conor Farren, Consultant Psychiatrist, St PatricksUniversity Hospital, and Clinical Senior Lecturer, TrinityCollege Dublin.

Conor Farren graduated in medicine from UniversityCollege Dublin in 1985. He went on to train in psychiatryat St Patricks University Hospital, Dublin. He taught andconducted research in psychiatry at Yale University, New

Haven, Connecticut, where he began work on the ideascontained in this book. He went on to take charge of theaddiction and mental health section of Mount Sinai School ofMedicine and the Bronx Veterans Hospital, New York for anumber of years, before returning to Ireland. He is a consult-ant psychiatrist based in Dublin, and also lectures in andconducts research at Trinity College Dublin. He has written

numerous scientific articles on the subject of mental health,and has also written extensively for newspapers and popularjournals and participated in media discussions on radio andtelevision on the same topic. He is the author of Overcom-ing Alcohol Misuse: A 28-Day Guide (Orpen Press, 2011). He ismarried and lives in Dublin.

Further information is available at www.conorfarren.com.


5/11

ix

Contents

Introduction What Is the U-Turn? .................................... 1

I. Why You Need this Book................................................. 51. Self-Understanding ....................................................... 7

II. Negative Emotions and How They Hurt Us ............... 232. Anger .............................................................................. 253. Jealousy and Envy ........................................................ 414. Depression: The Experience ........................................ 535. Depression: The Escape ............................................... 676. Fear and Anxiety ........................................................... 817. Criticism and Hatred .................................................... 105

III. The Fundamentals of Self-Belief ................................ 1198. Self-Belief and Inferiority ............................................. 121

9. Personality and Projection ........................................... 15510. Talking and Communication .................................... 181

IV. The Importance of Relationships................................ 21111. Relationships and Intent ............................................ 21312. Relationships and Power ........................................... 231

V. The Reason for It All ....................................................... 253

13. Joy and Purpose .......................................................... 255Recommended Books ............................................................ 283List of Useful Organisations ................................................. 285Index ........................................................................................ 289


6/11

1

Introduction

What Is the U-Turn?

We all think we are good at understanding other people,but many of us are not so good at understanding ourselves.Even those of us such as psychiatrists and mental healthprofessionals who try to help people understand andhelp themselves for a living are not so hot when it comes to

understanding and helping ourselves when it is our turn togo through an emotional rough patch.

The U-Turn will take you on a journey of understanding of your emotions, of your personal make-up and of yourrelationships with the aim of guiding you to a life of joyand self-fulfilment. That concept of the U-turn signifies ajourney of transformation; a journey in which a person with

a lot of self-hatred at one end of the scale can be transformedinto a person with self-appreciation at the other. The U inthe U-turn denotes understanding. The journey out of nega-tive emotions, unhappiness and low self-esteem is throughunderstanding understanding yourself, understanding theemotional forces that govern you, and understanding how tocomplete a personal U-turn.

As we all know, emotional logic is not logical logic; theemotional world is governed by different and unclear laws.This book aims to clarify those laws and reveal your underly-ing emotional logic, ultimately guiding you to a better place.


7/11

The U-Turn

2

This book is divided into five sections. The first section isa general introduction to the book and an overview of justwhat the book is about. The second section is an explora-tion of the traumatic and negative emotions that can takeover a sufferers mentality and leave little room for anythingelse. This section contains an explanation of the reasons andforces behind negative emotions and includes exercises onhow to overcome them. The third section deals with thebasic underlying mental structures revealed by an analy-

sis of negative emotions. It explores the different aspects ofself-esteem, self-presentation and character, explaining howthese structures underlie our emotions and how understand-ing them leads to self-development. The fourth section dealswith relationships, how underlying forces influence them,and how we can use knowledge of these forces to take actionand correct the bad way we run them. The last section is a

synthesis of different ideas in the book, discussing how therules we have learned, the structures we have understoodand the emotions we have controlled can be used to help usgain direction and purpose in our lives.

Throughout this book the journey through self-under-standing to self-fulfilment is mapped out by the U-turnprinciples. These principles are very simple. They are feel,

think and act. These principles will guide you through thedifferent stages of the journey and let you plan a route foryourself. And although each section of the book deals withvery different emotions and the very different structuresbehind these emotions these principles will guide you onyour U-turn at every stage.

Each section of this book takes a different aspect of theU-turn, and brings you to a greater understanding of whatcauses hurt and unhappiness and what makes you fulfilledand content. The journey is personal and the route to befollowed is also personal. There can be only one author you.If you are not content with what you are at the moment and


8/11

What Is the U-Turn?

3

if you are suffering because of this discontent, you need todig inside yourself before you make your move outside. Thisbook maps out the pathway to self-understanding throughthe very emotions that make you unhappy. It explores theunderlying principles that govern those emotions and showsyou why you feel the way you do. It then moves through themost fundamental aspects of your relationships to show youhow to make them a positive and happy force in your life.Finally, it explores the journey you have to make to reach

your ultimate goals, and helps you find out just what thosegoals are.

The main method advocated in this book is one of action.The purpose of the journey of understanding is to makepossible a journey of action and change. The purpose of self-understanding is to use that understanding to transformyour life from suffering to contentment, and you need both

things understanding and action to do this. You cant haveone without the other. Understanding without action leadsto greater self-hatred and lower self-esteem. Action withoutunderstanding leads to frustration and unhappiness, becauseit is purposeless. The other important point about action isthat it must be worked out personally in order to have thedesired effect on your life and happiness. By understanding

what oppresses us, we can learn what we truly want fromlife. By taking action against our oppression, we can funda-mentally change what we think of ourselves. We can decideto take back control of our lives, armed with self-understand-ing in one hand and a plan of action in the other.

Using this book, and the principles of feel, think and act,you can turn your life around. And as you will see, theseprinciples and the journey they will set out for you are veryeasy to say but much more difficult to carry out. No matterwhat any other book may tell you, the U-turn in your life isnot a painless process and it is not going to happen withouteffort and action. Is this going to be just an interesting read?


9/11

The U-Turn

4

Or is it going to be a fulfilling journey? The only person whocan answer this is you. You can take a U-turn in your lifeand make it like your wildest dream, or you can let it go andleave it simply a dream. The choice is yours.


10/11

UI

Why You

Need this

Book

Clickhere to order Paperback

Clickhere to order eBook

Clickhere to order Kindle version
http://www.orpenpress.com/the-u-turn.htmlhttp://www.orpenpress.com/the-u-turn.htmlhttp://www.orpenpress.com/the-u-turn-ebook.htmlhttp://www.orpenpress.com/the-u-turn-ebook.htmlhttp://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Turn-Guide-Happiness-ebook/dp/B00BWT5IVYhttp://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Turn-Guide-Happiness-ebook/dp/B00BWT5IVYhttp://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Turn-Guide-Happiness-ebook/dp/B00BWT5IVYhttp://www.orpenpress.com/the-u-turn-ebook.htmlhttp://www.orpenpress.com/the-u-turn.html


11/11

The U Turn: A Guide to Happiness

Documents

Transcript of The U Turn: A Guide to Happiness